That was a great breakdown! I got a divorce a few years ago and what did I do? Went straight to the internet! :) Looking for answers and wanting to learn how to be attractive. Mind you, I never went to the internet before for anything other then how to fix something. I've learned a lot but I see a lot of confusion also. I think people are for one, trying to sell you something and don't really care, and two, they are generalizing people, saying all men do this all women do that. Humans are complex creatures that need each other for love and to help guide each other through life. A LOT of people are broken and need help with controlling their emotions. Never been taught how or never had parents that cared. I think that would take care of a huge amount of issues we have today. Thank you for the video!
This is a beautiful comment, thank you. How have you found dating since your divorce? Agree re online advice. Unfortunately engagement often comes from controversial takes, so there are dating/life coaches and content creators who use sweeping generalised statements which create a buzz but aren't helpful to those who want to date successfully or build healthy relationships. Very few people are taught emotional regulation either which is critical! What have you found that helps you? Sam @ CATCH.
When thinking about my family goals, I realised I was heavily independent and afraid of commitment, afraid that he would be disloyal to me. But when I developed my communication skills, it took me about a week to move from freedom mode to commitment mode. It is scary but fun. I know that if i can confidently communicate, i can find out if a man has intention to be loyal and committed to me also. If he's not i happily let him go and meet the next match.
Love it! You are worthy of commitment and loyalty. Opening up can be difficult, and sometimes it just requires that awareness and shift in mindset and building positive beliefs. What bought you that level of self-awareness? Sam @ CATCH.
A lot of really solid advice in this. I'll admit I've fallen into the habit of reading lots of the anti-woman or anti-man stuff that comes up online, but my real life experience has been totally different. Like sure, if you look for people in distasteful places like bars and clubs, of course you'll find distasteful people. But for normal life, it's probably best not to believe all the negative crap about each side.
Thank you! Glad it resonated with you. Yes, controversial takes create an emotional reaction that draws us in, then social media algorithms see we have interacted with that content and shows us more of the same until it feels like the truth. Very dangerous, as a negative mindset creates negative perceptions and experiences whereas a positive mindset does the opposite. What anti-man/anti-women beliefs did you get drawn into and how did you snap out of it? Sam @ CATCH.
@@catchdatingofficial Well a lot of the common negative tropes are things like women lashing out aggressively at dudes that approach them. If it weren't for me approaching women in person, I'd probably believe that trope. But no woman I've approached has been rude at all about turning me down. Now I've also not been disrespectful or persistent either, so that may be a factor. If guys are overly weird about approaches, then I could see women's reactions being harsher. It's easy for people to believe the online messaging if they never actually try real life.
@@Totsy30 Absolutely, reading those narratives can breed fear and that's why we need to build our confidence and our own narrative. Re: approaching, sounds like you have it down! Being respectful and accepting the answer is key. We did two videos recently on approaching with confidence and respect, and how to not be creepy and make a good first impression and covered those points! Thanks for your comments - great to have you in the community. Sam
Just an unsolicited FYI on the audio quality: You have an echo in your recorded audio. It is caused by sound reflecting off the walls excessively. One easy way mitigate this is to set up a fabric covered or foam and fabric covered divider up behind you or in some other position that prevents sound from reflecting off the walls in the manner it currently does. Turning your recording desk and putting a bookcase filled with books on the wall is another potential solution.
@@catchdatingofficial No problem. essentially any number of things that dampen/absorb the sound reflected by the walls and wood floor will work. foam, fabric, and carpet are the best material types to mitigate sound. Shapes that direct sound away from the microphone work too.
I think your advice at the end is well intentioned, but horrifyingly dangerous. Mainly because if what you believe you want and deserve is out of tune with reality's objective limitations on you then you will drive yourself into psycosis trying to self actualize your desired relationship when it is physically impossible for such a relationship to happen in reality. It is especially dangerous for women who have yet to realize that men do not look at relationships the same way they do. It is far too common to find women who have made themselves into the man they wish to have based on this advice only to post videos online in frustration because they are baffled when they are rejected by men who don't want that in their potential wife.
what are reality's objective limitations in your view? or is physically impossible to happen? Also what do you mean when you reference women becoming the man they wish to have? I have thoughts but want to make sure I understand fully. Sam @ CATCH.
@@catchdatingofficial 1/2 Most of this is answered in my response to your other comment. like before you have to filter by newiest first to see it due to the yt bug. Comments over a certian length seem to get hit by the bug. edit: comment 2/2 was afected by the bug too.
@@catchdatingofficial 2/2 Also what do you mean when you reference women becoming the man they wish to have? When women assume that men look at relationships the same way they do they tend to think that acquiring more socioeconomic status (a career) makes them more valuable as a potential wife. They want a man like that so they take actions to achieve that because they assume men value the same things.
That was a great breakdown! I got a divorce a few years ago and what did I do? Went straight to the internet! :) Looking for answers and wanting to learn how to be attractive. Mind you, I never went to the internet before for anything other then how to fix something. I've learned a lot but I see a lot of confusion also. I think people are for one, trying to sell you something and don't really care, and two, they are generalizing people, saying all men do this all women do that. Humans are complex creatures that need each other for love and to help guide each other through life. A LOT of people are broken and need help with controlling their emotions. Never been taught how or never had parents that cared. I think that would take care of a huge amount of issues we have today. Thank you for the video!
This is a beautiful comment, thank you. How have you found dating since your divorce?
Agree re online advice. Unfortunately engagement often comes from controversial takes, so there are dating/life coaches and content creators who use sweeping generalised statements which create a buzz but aren't helpful to those who want to date successfully or build healthy relationships. Very few people are taught emotional regulation either which is critical! What have you found that helps you? Sam @ CATCH.
When thinking about my family goals, I realised I was heavily independent and afraid of commitment, afraid that he would be disloyal to me. But when I developed my communication skills, it took me about a week to move from freedom mode to commitment mode. It is scary but fun. I know that if i can confidently communicate, i can find out if a man has intention to be loyal and committed to me also. If he's not i happily let him go and meet the next match.
Love it! You are worthy of commitment and loyalty. Opening up can be difficult, and sometimes it just requires that awareness and shift in mindset and building positive beliefs. What bought you that level of self-awareness? Sam @ CATCH.
A lot of really solid advice in this. I'll admit I've fallen into the habit of reading lots of the anti-woman or anti-man stuff that comes up online, but my real life experience has been totally different. Like sure, if you look for people in distasteful places like bars and clubs, of course you'll find distasteful people. But for normal life, it's probably best not to believe all the negative crap about each side.
Thank you! Glad it resonated with you. Yes, controversial takes create an emotional reaction that draws us in, then social media algorithms see we have interacted with that content and shows us more of the same until it feels like the truth. Very dangerous, as a negative mindset creates negative perceptions and experiences whereas a positive mindset does the opposite. What anti-man/anti-women beliefs did you get drawn into and how did you snap out of it? Sam @ CATCH.
@@catchdatingofficial Well a lot of the common negative tropes are things like women lashing out aggressively at dudes that approach them. If it weren't for me approaching women in person, I'd probably believe that trope. But no woman I've approached has been rude at all about turning me down. Now I've also not been disrespectful or persistent either, so that may be a factor. If guys are overly weird about approaches, then I could see women's reactions being harsher. It's easy for people to believe the online messaging if they never actually try real life.
@@Totsy30 Absolutely, reading those narratives can breed fear and that's why we need to build our confidence and our own narrative. Re: approaching, sounds like you have it down! Being respectful and accepting the answer is key. We did two videos recently on approaching with confidence and respect, and how to not be creepy and make a good first impression and covered those points! Thanks for your comments - great to have you in the community. Sam
Just an unsolicited FYI on the audio quality: You have an echo in your recorded audio. It is caused by sound reflecting off the walls excessively. One easy way mitigate this is to set up a fabric covered or foam and fabric covered divider up behind you or in some other position that prevents sound from reflecting off the walls in the manner it currently does. Turning your recording desk and putting a bookcase filled with books on the wall is another potential solution.
Thanks so much! This has been on my mind. The fabric divider is a great idea. Hope you enjoyed the video content despite the audio. Sam @ CATCH.
@@catchdatingofficial No problem. essentially any number of things that dampen/absorb the sound reflected by the walls and wood floor will work. foam, fabric, and carpet are the best material types to mitigate sound. Shapes that direct sound away from the microphone work too.
❤❤❤
Thank you!
I think your advice at the end is well intentioned, but horrifyingly dangerous. Mainly because if what you believe you want and deserve is out of tune with reality's objective limitations on you then you will drive yourself into psycosis trying to self actualize your desired relationship when it is physically impossible for such a relationship to happen in reality. It is especially dangerous for women who have yet to realize that men do not look at relationships the same way they do. It is far too common to find women who have made themselves into the man they wish to have based on this advice only to post videos online in frustration because they are baffled when they are rejected by men who don't want that in their potential wife.
what are reality's objective limitations in your view? or is physically impossible to happen? Also what do you mean when you reference women becoming the man they wish to have? I have thoughts but want to make sure I understand fully. Sam @ CATCH.
@@catchdatingofficial 1/2
Most of this is answered in my response to your other comment. like before you have to filter by newiest first to see it due to the yt bug. Comments over a certian length seem to get hit by the bug.
edit: comment 2/2 was afected by the bug too.
@@catchdatingofficial 2/2
Also what do you mean when you reference women becoming the man they wish to have?
When women assume that men look at relationships the same way they do they tend to think that acquiring more socioeconomic status (a career) makes them more valuable as a potential wife. They want a man like that so they take actions to achieve that because they assume men value the same things.
Get a microphone sweetie :)
We will, but no sweeties here trust me 😆