Trump Hawking $60 Bibles to Help Legal Woes, Texas Man Runs for President as Literally Anybody Else
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- Опубликовано: 25 мар 2024
- Jimmy addresses the latest news, like Trump selling a new line of $60 bibles, a Texas man changing his name to run for president as "Literally Anybody Else" and the FAA preparing pilots to fly during next month's solar eclipse.
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Trump Hacking $60 Bibles to Help Legal Woes, Texas Man Runs for President as Literally Anybody Else
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#JimmyFallon 
Приколы
The ultimate con artist hawking Bibles. Priceless! Can't make this shite up!
You said it .. Just when you think this grifter can't sink any lower .. well .. he does, and no doubt his supporters will buy into it .
and if you order your Bible now, we'll throw in absolutely free, a pair of Golden Sneakers
His supporters are dumb enough to fall for it.
@@paddy.7784 Nothing surprises me from the Orange Maga-Pie , we might not wake up to sunshine every morning ; we can however count on another TrumpF atrocity🗽🧢
@@reveillerussell914 Right now we must find humor in this clown, at the same time he's serious
I literally hollered when he said it was his favorite book lmao!
Just don't ask him which part he likes best. Perhaps “Two Corinthians”, but “I wouldn't want to get into it. Because to me, that's very personal”.
😂
Well, it IS his favorite book! What we don't see is the bibble covers are pasted over the child porn mags he studies.
I doubt it is. He has read Hitlers book, but seems to know nothing about any fantasy book that doesn't include him.
Me, too - I split a gut when I heard that! His other "favorite" books must be kiddie porn and comic books... stuff with no words and just pictures.
Remember the last time he was filmed holding up a bible? It was 2020 during the George Floyd protests.....and he was holding it UPSIDE DOWN ! 🤣
That's a photo I will never forget
at least he was there...Biden was nowhere to be seen...just like East Palestine...
How can we forget😂😂😂
So funny hahahaha idiot
He is really devout not really , he is a dangerous fake wannabe tyrant
Never trust two kinds of people: A religious leader who tells you who to vote. A politician who tells you how to pray.
I'm stealing this!
especially if the guy is an orange haired liar !
Spot on
🤣😂 God sense of humor... Devil's servant selling Bibles...Jeremiah 31:34... Romans 1:20-21... Tap to John 14: 26 ❤
Vote to keep us free to participate in Christianity... It is a very low bar... Forcing Christianity is not Faith, just vote within the church, those who go to church, and don't call themselves the chosen... Protect the faith with your vote. Russia has designated JW as terror... When you don't involve you have no choice, no vote is a default to the worst.
This man never stops being an embarrassment to himself and to the United States.
💯 That.
I'll be totally fair, anyone watching him be a professional fool and doesn't realize it... "fill in what you like", personally I got click baited here.. normally I don't watch anything mainstream, I avoid it like the plague... no I won't see roadhouse, or bad boys, none of that, you get $0 of my support.
Trump or Jimmy Kimmel?
@@JTSA1234this is Fallon.
@@MisssKayy bots are known to hallucinate, it mixed up the Jimmys
Has anyone proofread this Bible? Does it have the infamous Thou Shall Commit Adultry?
Yes. Right there with Thou Shall Covet thy neighbor's ass.
His 10 Commandments give him immunity. It is his "to do" list.
Thou shall Not commit Adultery
@@lameckganda6469/whoosh
@@lameckganda6469
🧻misread the 10 Commandments is the point...he cheated - adultery.
Ivana, he cheated on her with Marla...
allegation Marla cheated on him...
and we all know he cheated on Melania!
"I have many" bibles -- 'the Gideons gave them to me'.
You mean you don’t want one from Jim Baker? Tammy will sign it for you.
@@SandraPerez-ck8xr😂😂😂😂
I got a few of those too . When I was homeless . Two green and one brown and Oh yes , one in military camouflage . All were freely given at the soup kitchens . I think the Salvation Army gives them out too . Also free .
@SandraPerez-ck8xr. I wouldn't take anything from any of the tele-evangelists . They're all a bunch of actors to me , looking to win an academy award .
When trump is reading his many bibles at home he just put play boy and penthouse magazines inside it !
Biff was always an idol of Trump's
Hustler I think
Play Girl
Money money money that who DT is
@@lameckganda6469 The world best salesman and the world's worst business manager.
Absolutely a banger Jimmy!💕🙏😂Love it when you put Trump in his place!🤣😂
Hawking Bibles.
There… I fixed it.
Hocking
@@factz8131to hock something is to take it to a pawnshop
Yes! Hawking! 💋💖😆
@@factz8131when something is held by a pawnshop it is said to be “in hock”. If you’re the one who hocked the item that means you took it there. Hawking items is a sort of selling scheme.
Thank you!
Remember the Bible seller scene from 'Oh brother where art thou'? Yeah it's like that.
😅😅😅❤
Very much the same .
John Goodman, best Cyclops in a movie based on Homer's Oddyssy EVAH! It's a small category, but Goodman's performance really rocked.👏👏👏✌🖖
We need the 3 Sirens to turn X45 into a horney-toad!
@@caronstout354 he's already infamous for horniness and toadliness, so the spell should be easy.😎
"It is morally wrong to let a sucker keep his money.'
W.C. Fields
According to Trump and P. T. Barnum, "There's a sucker born every minute."
W.C. in D.C 2024
"Speaking of Trump"...something i dream of never hearing some day.
TRUMP 2024!!!
@@martinscrapp7166 KLUCK'O THE CLOWN ! "CONVICT". 2024
It also includes a copy of the constitution. Talk about separating church and state.
The same Constitution that he has posted on his Truth social that he wants to eliminate
The Democratic Party has become a religion itself. Speak for yourselves while yours push their own blue 📘 laws on every single American.
Keep on tithing, I mean donating to them! Let them run your thinking and your lifestyle choices, just like a religion seeks to! 😉
Two things he's never read.
@@richardsimon4135 Anyone who claims Trump can be a dictator hasn't read one of those either.
Trump separates church and state very well, thank you. He keeps one roll of bibble pages on the wall to the right of his toilet and a roll of Constitution pages on the left wall.
Makes you wonder when he'll take credit for personally writing his $60 bibles cover to cover also ?
Bible of con games.
Not to be outdone, Joe Biden is now offering his version of the Quran for $59.99. For $559.99 you can get a copy personally autographed by Allah. For $500,000 you can get one with original illustrations by Hunter Biden.
Like I said before, If Trump has many Bibles, & follows the Bible then I'm an Alien!! 🤣🤣
Alright OX2NZ-WTR, identify your place of precedence!
He was laughing when he said it psycho
@@factz8131, No He wasn't SNOWFLAKE!! Keep defending the MAGA cult leader!! Nice comment though. 🙄🙄
!!! I'm reporting you to high command !!! We're not supposed to reveal ourselves. I'm gonna need your DiP Division ID and rectal serial number so I can inform the correct superiors above you.
@@S.Shea2432 I’m not maga 🤣😂🤣 Trump was laughing when he said it was his favorite book I know it’s not funny but it is
My grandparents used to give bibles away
They would say
The good word is to be given
So is he and Ivanka going to do a remake of the movie Paper Moon?
It's about a conman selling Bibles too.
If Trump Senior has 5 kids by 3 wives and is traveling south at 50 mph, and Trump Junior has 5 kids by one wife and is traveling west at 40 mph, how many indictments until the 2 men meet in prison?
I don't know because they are both up past their jail time.
@@lmena5696
Best answer
🤣🤣🤣
💌
Never, dumbass.
So having a different number of kids and having different wives is supposed to help us figure out when an indictment happens with those two people?
Your question makes zero sense, which means Democrats on social media will upvote it to celebrity status.
With tax it comes to $ 66.60
That's already $200 more than all the bibbles on earth are worth.
He needs prayer.
@@deborahtate192 Sure he does. Forty thousand tons of prayer and $5 will buy a lousy cup of coffee at Denny's.
Not to be outdone, Joe Biden is now offering his version of the Quran for $59.99. For $559.99 you can get a copy personally autographed by Allah. For $500,000 you can get one with original illustrations by Hunter Biden.
That number suites him!
He tried to buy the NFL's Buffalo Bills pro football team back about 2014. He was in the pool of 6 final bidders the NFL chose and was asked to submit financial records to show he could either buy the team or could raise funds for it with solid collateral backing, but instead he submitted a letter with a copy of a Fortune Magazine article listing him as one of the wealthier people in the United States. The NFL turned him down.
THAT is so funny.
Imagine a Trump-owned sports team..cheap gold uniforms, unsafe football helmets, and unpaid players.
NFL showed some economic discernment!
@@kevinb3812 If only others could do the same.
@@caronstout354and Peter Navaro as the head coach and Rudy Giuliani running the Defense😮
I cannot wait for some business to begin selling "Stormy Daniels" picture inserts for these bibles. You need the whole package!
@bmwtravel1100
Ok that was brilliant 😅
You'd like that right? She's on the hub, just remember Donnie T already tapped that
You'd like that right? She's on the hub, just remember Donnie T already tapped that
You'd like that right? She's on the hub, just remember Donnie T already tapped that
You'd like that right? She's on the hub, just remember Donnie T already tapped that
Hey, my dad bought one of Jerry Falwell's bicentennial bibles. It was from a Goodwill store in Pasco, hehe
we always Knew this Guy is Nothing but a Snake Oil Sales Man...
Yeah bibles are all snake oil...regardless of the religion in them.
Trump has been a professional conman, from the day he elbowed his way into the New York celebrity scene back in the 70s. A fake from day one. I guess we need to give him props for faking it until he made it to President of the United States. But from day one, he was an unctuous blowhard and repugnant self-promoter. Anyone paying attention knows this.
That's coming, 12oz. bottle for $29.95
Please don't insult Snake Oil. Even Snake Oil is more useful than Donald Trump.
😂
The sketch quotes was absolutely hilarious 😂.
The Golden Bull Thumping the Bible is a Revelation.
It's blasphemous
@cjcarver6290
Indeed it is also additionally that, cj carver 6290; as further research, and/or knowledge of the first five books of the old testament and the (very) last book of the Bible would elicit. It is also God-tier Boss Level Hypocricy at it's moldy feces covered finest.
OMG, OMG, OMG Say it isn't so!!
@cynthianolder3557
Only if the shoes come without tongues.. 🚫👅 ...one must keep things like this Straight Laced You Know... .
💯👍
T never stops to prove the gullability of his supporters
Decades ago, there was a write-in campaign promoting "anybody" for president and "nobody" for VP
Nixon : If a president do it it's not Illegal.
Trump : If I do it even Illegal becomes Legal.
And he's the only POTUS who can DECLASSIFY HIGH LEVEL SECRET DOCS just by THINKING ABOUT IT.
What a Jedi! 🤣🤣🤣
@@cobrakai388 and change the course of hurricanes with the stroke of a Sharpie! And triple the size of a penthouse. 😂✌🖖
@@cobrakai388… you see ? you underestimated him
If I dood it I get a whippin'.-----I dood it.
-----Red Skelton as The Mean Widdle Kid
I think you mean "Hawking" - carry around and offer (goods) for sale, typically advertising them by shouting.
"street traders were hawking costume jewelry"
No, hawking died last year.
@@douglasdavis8395😂😂
'That'll be $ 66.6 after tax...😈'
🙄
.59 on sale @ Goodwill
$DJT was worth that today
Reminds me of the Character Moses Pray in the movie Paper Moon...
There isn’t anything that Trump won’t exploit. Not. One. Single. Thing.
Who went to the funeral of the fallen cop in NY......TRUMP...not anyone from your TRIBE...they were to busy raising $$$$$$$$$$$$$
@@amazinggrace6640 Trump looted his mother's pockets for candy just before she was planted.
@@amazinggrace6640 Bot.
Go buy some Butterfingers.
even the bible he wants to exploit what a clown 🤡
@@amazinggrace6640
I heard he was trying to offload a few Bibles.
Lets ask him what his favote bible verses???
He'll say his favorite is Roe versus Wade but they don't rhyme.
Thou shall let me get away with all in any crimes
He was asked that question and declined to answer on the basis that it was too personal. Really, because he can't quote even one verse.
@@ritacouchcooper2842 I couldn't quote a bibble verse if one jumped out of the toilet and bit me on the HOO-HAW, because I don't study useless horseshit. But I'll always know right from wrong, a lie from the truth, honesty from dishonesty, and a real president from a phony career criminal. Too bad 62 million naive souls, who call themselves Americans, can't make the same claim.
That dog catcher skit told one hell of a story!
First he sells golden idols, then Bible's. Always working both side's of the fence!
Vitamins are next!
I want one of those bibles…they’re the ones that are hollowed-out so you can store stuff in it like crushed up Adderall or top-secret documents?
"Just say...yes."
And guns.
Now that is one individual who’s never cracked a Bible in his life.
Jiminy cricket!!!!!😂😂😂😂
"Corinthian leather" I see what you did there 😉
Sneakers were the real crime
Ha. So far…. He just went public with a failing Social Media company. The gullibles will ape in to the stock and he will rug pull and steal their money. Just wait
Trumps reselling the bedside Gidians from his closing hotels.
LOL ! Hope he doesn't get caught doing that too .
You're on Fire 🔥🚒💨💨💨💨💨 tonight 😅😂😊
Trump's grifting never ends.
Who went to the funeral of the fallen cop in NY......TRUMP...not anyone from your TRIBE...they were to busy raising $$$$$$$$$$$$$
😭😭😭😭@@amazinggrace6640
@@amazinggrace6640😂😂😂😂😂😅😅. Raise the money are you a little bit delusional I think, b look up the disgrace orange face, book yourself in the mirror and see who's raising money 💰 education please 🥺
@@amazinggrace6640 how are those Butterfingers going on those Bibles😂😂
He’s the grift that keeps on grifting.
*Trump is doing a two-for-one offer, his Bible plus+ a copy of Mein Kampf for just $199!* 👍😎📚
Not to be outdone, Joe Biden is now offering his version of the Quran for $59.99. For $559.99 you can get a copy personally autographed by Allah. For $500,000 you can get one with original illustrations by Hunter Biden.
Who went to the funeral of the fallen cop in NY......TRUMP...not anyone from your TRIBE...they were to busy raising $$$$$$$$$$$$$
@@amazinggrace6640Fake news. Trump is bankrupt and would sell his own mommy for a penny if he could.
You hit the nail on the head!
So true,he reminds me of a televangelist with a bad tupe and phony attitude ! 😅
It's like devil selling Bibles😂😂😂😂😂
True words!
My favorite book😂😂😂
Diplomacy plz😂😂😂😂😂
HELL YES
"In the beginning there was light. And Trump saw that there was light, and said "This is no good..."
And then he looks into the sun
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
how is it not bursting into flames! oh, its not a real bible.
Maybe the assumed power is merely superstition ?
how you make the same typo TWICE lol in the title AND thumbnail; "hacking" you mean "HAWKING"? 😂 (maybe they were just laughing too hard to focus)
You can get a free Buy-Bull in any Motel room~!
Surprised he can hold it without bursting into flames 🔥
#fakebible 😂
60 bucks for a Bible? I have three and they were all free.
He's marketing to people who have everything BUT ( a Bible ) in their home . Probably make a killing on the deal .
Damn Jimmy did u hafta spoil the Bachelor for me? I was waiting til tonite to watch...a warning woulda been nice sheesh.
“Desperate people do desperate things”!
Trump should be held accountable..
You don’t say😂
I know he should for being the best president since Ronald Regan.
@2crude2crudeofficialband3 Yea ok.
@@2crude2crudeofficialband3 👍
@stlrecon2475 It's the new generation we live with. Nothing but a bunch of sheep.
His cult comparing him to Christ has gone to his head. 😂
and all the cheeseburgers have gone right to his ass
Cults, Christ and Trump are all bad omens. Turds never fall far from the butthole.
You sound like a 🤡
Regard, the rich Corinthian leather....😁
You'd think with all those writers, they could tell the diff between hacking and hocking.
Love the sketches!!!!
I'm sure the title was meant to be 'hawking bibles'
I like hacking better
corinthians leather = Love it
And if you buy that, I got 2 Corinthians I wanna sell ya 😂🤣🤣
Trump says this is the only Bible he endorses? I would check the entire text for any changes he made. My father was issued a Bible in WWII that changed “Thou shalt not kill” to “Thou shalt not kill except in case of war.”
Seriously??
To be fair "they" have been rewriting history for a good while, Trump is just attempting to go further back in history. The Bible is basically a history book so why not, revelations be damn.
Worth checking out...could be valuable.
Did the research. The only alteration to the WW2 Roosevelt issued bible was the added letter.
"To the armed forces:
As commander-in-chief I take pleasure in commending the reading of the Bible to all who serve in the armed forces of the United States. Throughout the centuries men of many diverse faiths and diverse origins have found in the Sacred Book words of wisdom, counsel, and inspiration. It is the fountain of strength and the highest aspiration of the human soul." -Franklin D. Roosevelt
"All Americans need a Bible in their home."😂 "And I have many. It's my favorite book."😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🥴
No kidding, anyone that would believe that must have a real struggle getting through life, 🫣
@@griggbaylee5808 Dorks who choke on bibbles usually do!
"All Americans need laughter in their home." "And I have Trump. He's my favorite comedian."
I thought it cost less than $60. Why is that funny. Lawyers are expensive. I'm a member of the American Bar Association.
That look on Jimmys face at 1:11!!!
Supporters of his must have a hard time when people ask them who they are voting for.
Person: Who are you voting for to be president?
Supporter: Literally Anybody Else.
Person: Okay, so you aren't voting. Gotcha. So who would you vote for if you did vote?
Supporter: Literally Anybody Else.
Person: You already said that, but if you had to choose, who would you vote for?
Supporter: Literally Anybody Else! That's who I'm voting for!
Person: Be more specific.
Supporter: Aaaaaaaah!
The King Donald version of the Bible. Called it years ago...
King Donald's Version is the True Bibull.
Is that the same Corinthian as received the letters from Paul, MCP?
No, that was the Chrysler Cordoba!
“But Faith, like a jackal, feeds among the tombs, and even from these dead doubts she gathers her most vital hope.”
(Moby Dick; Chap 7 p36) ― Herman Melville
The Bibles burst into flames when you open them
That would be Creepy Joe.
They have a Phoenix is inside of them ?
Really?
Has he bragged about ‘I’d be married to Ivanka if she wasn’t my daughter!”
No?
That was #45?
Ok, thought so.
@@POWERQUEST123
AD Miles cameo, lezz gooo
You make me laugh !!
Yeah but how much would you really pay for a re-gifted hotel bible? Seriously?
..a Bible that was worth only $49.99 three years ago.
Don the Con selling Bible is like a Serial Killer selling Life Insurance.
Didn't you mean life insurance?
I have many, many Bibles in my house. So many... too many even to count.
Lots of uneven table legs at Mar-a-Lago.
How come he didn't try to joke about the Bridge in Baltimore though, huh?!?!
Hahahaha the sketch quotes 🤣🤣🤣
Value! Comes with prayer, personal blessing and a mugshot!
45 bible on sale @ GW .59.
Last Book, there are four books. You there?
Boy buy😂 He would know know the Bible unless he was using it as toliet paper...
What is a boy buy? ''Know Know''? Are you even carrying a full suitcase?
@lancasterritzyescargotdine2602 Ummm.....it's a Expression. 'Buy not bye because he's selling Bibles. Did you see the same clip?🤔
@@candymonay You're still not making a bit of sense. Maybe you should employ "a Expression" [sic] others are familiar with.
@lancasterritzyescargotdine2602 🤣🤣🤣 If you were not raised in the culture why would you argue. Move on. 💯
@@candymonay If you were raised alone on a south seas desert island and never spoke any language, how would you argue with bullshit?
Move on, indeed.
And don't drop out of 5th grade. You have a lot to learn.
Trump has just gone completely nuts..🤯
Did you just find that out?
It was an extremely short trip for him.
@@lancasterritzyescargotdine2602 no..guess l should of highlighted " completely " 😉..take care
I look forward to ALL the Trump court sketches as NFTs.
Biden be like.
my favorite is a ice cream and lollipops. Oh sorry I forgot I was in middle of a live event
Trump edited his Bible like Thomas Jefferson did, except he took out the parts about sins and judgement.
It's $60, but the edited version is only seven pages.
If you didn't know it comes with a copy of The Constitution as well, So 2 things DJ has never read before
His favorite book is Mein Kampf
Yes, but since he can't read German or English, he just looks at the pictures and stimulates himself.
@@lancasterritzyescargotdine2602 Good one!
He has a lot of them. One in every hotel room night table in Mar A Lago.
Is he holding the Bibles the right way up this time in the promo add?
That new sketch of dɯnɹ⊥ looks like Dr. Oz.
Be nice, it’s a miracle he condensed the Bible down to maybe 100 pages and mostly about him.
is shermanburger sherminators big brother from american pie lmao
Hawking
I watch Jimmy Fallon when Jimmy Kimmel doesn’t post
I prefer Jimmy Kimmel 1,000x
Thanks Jimmy for the laughs! Because the News stinks! 😉✌️❤️🦋🙏
It's Jimmy Fallon
Dufference between true prophets and false prophets in the Bible is motivation. True prophets are motivated by loyalty to God above all else, whereas false prophets are motivated by self-interest and a desire to be popular among the people.
Hey Don, having multiple bibles doesn't make you holier you only need one but it only works if you read it, start by turning it right side up😂😂