Hey is there any way that you could make a video on how to defend yourself without sounding defensive? Anyways I love your videos! you’re always so encouraging!!💖
The way I explain it to my mom is that having ADHD is like trying to parent a five year old but you are also the five year old, so you just get things that make things easier for the five year old part of the brain so that the parent part of the brain can get things like cooking and cleaning and work done
I realized that most people with adhd tend to be age reggressors! witch honestly makes a lot of sense, specially as myself being both an age reggressor and someone with adhd
A LOT of us with ADHD have had a good bit of childhood trauma. Forced to grow up early, or judged unfairly for being "too childish" when we are actually just "child-LIKE". Embracing the parts of us that are, functionally, still children, and nurturing that piece of you is always a good thing. Go climb a tree! Go play on a playground, or go to the zoo, or the kids science museum. It is good for your soul! PICK SOMETHING! Something you haven't done since you were a kid, or always wanted to do as a kid, and just fucking do it! In addition to all the obvious psychological ways it can help, it is just good for your soul.
Can confirm that going to the zoo as an adult because it seems fun is a *wonderful* and healing experience. We went the other week, and took my little, and just had a super chill time following the paths and experiencing the zoo with no pressure.
Yeah, I got bullied by some of the girls in my 5th grade class for still playing pretend. I couldn't understand why it was wrong to pretend when I was still a kid. Now I write novels (nothing published yet) because I never have wanted to give up pretending. Why be stuck with my boring life when I can imagine being someone else doing living a different one?
I love how our parents raised us when it came to ADHD. My mom has ADHD and knew her kids would probably inherit it before we came along, so we grew up knowing our diagnosis before we were even officially diagnosed. We always had loads of fidget toys, puzzles, quiet books for times where we had to be less rowdy, no one was ever pressured to be age appropriate with toys or books, and finding something that helped was celebrated. This continued as adults and was passed on to the new generation. My nieces and nephews got me addicted to the Gerald and Piggy books. I'm in my forties, they're meant for five year olds, and I have no shame about it. A good book is a good book. I always feel so lucky to have my family who are just amazingly supportive of each other. I think having such a strong family support is what allowed us to be so blasé about it when the rest of the world doesn't understand us. I would love to help everyone destigmatize this sort of thing, really glad you have this video.
Wow, that's wonderful! It's so great to hear of a positive growing up with ADHD experience, especially from that time period. I grew up around the same time, but wasn't diagnosed, so my experience was rather different. My family was/is supportive in general, but they just didn't understand me. I learned to embrace my uniqueness and not to feel shame, but it took a lot of time and emotional work.
As an adult i have a glitter wand, tangle toy and soft pink ostrich at my desk. I love my toys! The wand helps when I get mad! I love my local toy store!
reading your comment makes me feel a lot better about wanting to read a middle-grade book I've been recently interested in! I'm 21 now and was always reading books way above my grade level so it made me feel like I wasn't "reaching my potential" by going for a book targeted towards a younger audience. But you're right - a good book is a good book, so I shouldn't feel ashamed about it. Thank you
I love that you're normalizing buying "kid" stuff as an adult. My husband makes fun of my cute bandaids and sticker collection "problem", but I don't see why we shouldn't buy things that make us happy if we can afford it and it doesn't hurt anyone. I love fidget tools, creative projects/art supplies, and comfort items like stuffed animals. So what if my water bottle has Disney characters? At least I am drinking water!
I really don’t understand why doing more “kid” things as an adult is stigmatized. Who cares if you’re goofy or need to sleep with a stuffed animal at night because you need to hug something and temperature regulate with your spouse? I used to be so ashamed, and it’s ridiculous. The world is hard enough that things that bring you joy that don’t harm other people shouldn’t be stigmatized.
I love your "reality check" on the items you put in your basket at the end! I do this a lot when I go shopping because it helps me manage my impulsivity and I can reflect on whether I really need the items as I walk around, but some people I shop with get annoyed when I walk around with an item for the entire trip and then decide I don't want it. It also helps me save money and makes me feel less guilty later on about unnecessary spending.
I do this a lot with Sensory things specifically. Stuffed animals or squeeze balls etc. I get the hit of "mine" and then can rationalize a little better by the end of the trip if I "actually" want it or not.
Yes, this! It's also a reason I prefer to use a hand basket rather than a cart, because it makes me evaluate whether I want something enough to carry it around.
Agreed ! I find way to many adults books have SO MUCH violence in them and that is NOT relaxing. If it's violence in a "Hobbit" film, it's not as disturbing! I want intelligent characters, interesting stories & nothing like the "Real" world, which I am pretty 'done' with lately, lol !
I think that's where I started reading light novels and the books listed as LitRPG. they're like the young adult novels, only aimed for the teen through 99 audience, so it's not just the comming of age type stories where (at this point) I get bored of the umm...lack of knowledge that actually seems obvious for an adult- (of course you should...) but stories about adults put into fantastical situations and how they deal. My favortite recently would be the Ten Realms books by Micheal Chatfield. Excellent story that is with adult characters, making adult decisions, but doesn't have the gratutios bleh that novels usually found in the "grown up" section of book stores have.
@@m.maclellan7147 so true, I mostly just read Middle-Grade books and YA sometimes, why should I bother myself with books where adults are just suffering and are similar to our world...
I’m nearly 60 years old, and I read comic books, do LEGO sets, and play Dungeons & Dragons. Now, most of this stuff is cool, but for decades, it’s been frowned upon as “immature.” I realize now that most of these hobbies are things I’ve stuck with because for me, they are either ADHD-friendly or promote my executive functioning by learning new ways to get things done. Well, and their all very imaginative, and I love using my creativity! 😊
Pathfinder 2e is really ADHD friendly for GMs in my experience since 1. the rule set doesn't require inventing the missing half of the system (where I get bogged down in the details and forget to actually prep the session), and the adventure paths have good structure, so if I forgot to prep until last minute, it's ok; most of what I need is already there.
I’m an adult with ADHD and a nurse working on my masters degree. I recently had a day where I was melting down because I just absolutely could not focus on my paper that was due in just a few hours. I walked around a store, bought myself a giant sketch pad, pack of markers, and a koosh ball - and I took those with me and got the paper done ✅
As someone who's passionate about children's media and how we connect to it, I really appreciate that the ADHD community aren't ashamed of liking children's products! Here's some advice though: don't take 8 - 13 age range books lightly. Some of them can be *very* hard-hitting or depressing, so try not to dismiss them as "easy reading" just because the text is easy to read.
> try not to dismiss them as "easy reading" just because the text is easy to read. I'm almost sure I understood what you're trying to say: "a story can be both emotionally heavy and told with simple language". Is that an accurate restatement? [edit: quoted the contextual part of the paragraph instead of just the beginning.]
@@jonaskoelker I think that’s what was meant here. For example, one of my favorite books is a YA novel and the story is very heavy. It’s about a girl whose father abandons her and whose mother intentionally ran out in front of an ambulance to end her life during her pregnancy with the girl, obviously she survives, but her mother does not. No one in her family will get close to her because their too busy protecting the family secret that her mothers death was never an accident. First read it when I was 12. Yes, the prose is easy to get through since it’s written for younger readers, but obviously very heavy subject matter. I still love it though having been a traumatized kid myself.
The point isn't that the text is easy to read. The point is that they're hard hitting and depressing lol. Adult books are less emotion grabbing and more matter of fact sometimes. So boring.
Last Month I bought a book about local myths and legends clearly made for kids -but I loved it! The illustrations are cute and pretty, the stories are short enough for me to read one or two without getting overwhelmed or bored and the creepier stories are written in a way that wont disturb me xD 10/10 would recommend!
@@cathuff5802 as I'm from Germany the book is a german one and I dont think its available in english. The Title is "Hessische Sagen für Kinder" by Elke Leger (translates to something like "Hessian legends for children")
This really strikes a chord with me . I’m nearly 50 n a few years and I look around and see my ‘peers’ with all these mature ‘adult’ hobbies and I’m still into the same stuff I liked when I was a teenager. Comics, table top games, models, geek stuff! I think I must be immature but it just makes my brain happy, I like it! Life is tough with ADHD, hell my job is tough and I don’t want to have to feel ashamed that my interests are still, well, what I was into when I was a kid!
Young adults/teenagers/older kids stories often have more adventures, less stupid drama, and make more sense, especially character's actions. Story comes from the world around, not from characters not able to grow up like grownups should and talk to each other, or just doing something completely illogical for plot reasons.
100% agree! I'm glad to hear someone else feels that way: I was wondering if I was alone in this. :) Characters in most non-Young Adult "Contemporary Fiction" act in the strangest ways: like they need to generate problems for there to be a story. It reminds me of reality TV shows: neither feel "real" or interesting to me. I think Young Adult fiction doesn't do that because kids and young adults have a pretty good BS filter and won't put up with that. Other genres (fantasy, sci-fi, etc..) generally have other forces moving the plot and generating conflict, so the characters have clear motivations. It's like acting: the most realistic actions come when are when you are reacting to the world around you.
Yeah. I realised a few years ago the reason i love YA fantasy series is because of the focus on adventures. Which is also the reason i loved the three musketeers, Jules Verne's Extraordinary Voyages and LOTR/The Hobbit as a kid.
Thiss, this so much. Similar to series for me, the first season or 2 will be world/antagonists vs characters but then they so often devolve into solely character conflict, the problems/challenges the characters facing being just.. poor communication 9/10 times? It becomes so unwatchable as the characters you enjoy stop fighting the big bad evil monsters or whatever, & start to just argue with each other & That's the challenge to overcome. So painful every time
I personally found that a lot of “adult” fiction served a different purpose than why I was reading. I still read as an escape, a chance to go somewhere else in my imagination for a while. Adult fiction often takes itself so seriously, and I’m often not looking for that. Man, I gotta go get some of those journaling activities from target, tho. They look fun enough I might actually do them.
I feel like this is exactly why I'm so picky about the "adult" fiction I read, and why so much of it is fantasy and specifically "soft" sci-fi (stuff like Star Wars novels). I don't want serious, I want dragons and wizards, and all sorts of hokey things. It's why I find so much of modern young adult fiction sort of difficult to get into, as well; too much of it tries to imitate the serious drama of adult fiction, and it hits wrong...though manga and such are usually pretty agreeable for me. Also easy to read in a single sitting, two at most.
Have you read the Wide-Awake Princess series by E.D. Baker? If you haven’t, I highly recommend it! It is written by the author who wrote The Princess and The Frog, before it was adapted by Disney. She’s also written a few others in the same style that were great (I loved the one about Baba Yaga).
@@Mokiefraggle I totally identify with this. Though I do occasionally get into the "hard" fantasy and hyper focus on it. I loved the series(es?) by David Eddings as a teen. I've recently started rereading it.
@@tamoramuir2089 Mostly, I just find that it's the so-called "hard" sci-fi (the kind wherein the science is portrayed with aggressive accuracy, and things have to be "plausible" and have "verisimilitude" to be considered "good") is what I give a hard miss. Like, I love me some Star Wars, especially old expanded universe/Legends stuff from before the sequel trilogy. I like Star Trek, when people aren't trying to force the technology to make "sense." But when my fiance tried explaining the Ringworld series to me, in particular how the actual concept of the "ring-world" worked and why the fans actually fact-checked the author about how his science didn't work, and "the Ringworld is unstable!", I tuned out hard. Fantasy doesn't have quite as much of a "hard" equivalent, and even in those cases, it's still much looser and easier to swallow. Some folks try to create a reasonable plausibility for how their fantasy setting exists, or why it has the creatures it does, but most of that is still so fantastical that it's much easier to accept without making me tune out or cringe. Heck, I _love_ a good fantasy breakdown of how the dragons, etc. work in this world versus those in others, especially given how divergent they can be!
When I'm overwhelmed or anxious by a topic, I've found that sometimes looking at explanations of the topic intended for children help me a lot. Obviously no one likes feeling like they're being talked down to, but when it comes to explanations, I actively encourage people explaining things to me like I'm a child sometimes because it can help me understand so much.
If you ever find yourself searching something on wikipedia and it's a bit complicated, look at the translate options. You can actually translate most wikipedia pages into "simple english" and the goal of that 'translation' is to make it easier to understand. Great idea.
I’m in my 40s and have ADHD and I just started reading through the Percy Jackson books. They are targeted at middle schoolers but I still think they are great for adults too. I forgot to mention the Percy and many of his friends also have ADHD.
Riordan wrote them for his sons who have adhd. He probably has adhd himself too. That's my guess anyway. I think Percy's 'cool Latin teacher with real swords at school' is based on himself.
I absolutely love that series! I'll go back and re-read it on occasion. That and the Ranger's Apprentice. Another YA series but it's super great and quick to read.
That book series is great! No shame in reading it as an adult. Same with Harry potter and other fictional works. Stick with a genre you like or many likes and have fun with reading.
The Percy Jackson books are great! I’d recommend them and the Wings of Fire series by Tui T. Sutherland. Both are great books meant for middle graders that can also be interesting for adults.
Re: cookbooks, I really recommend the books by the amazing British anti-poverty campaigner, Jack Monroe. She is AuDHD and has written her books with really clear and accessible language and specific explanations. Her recipes are also pocket-friendly.
It's funny that this would come up now, because lately I've been thinking a lot about how having ADHD feels like having to essentially parent yourself. I do things like...buying weird, different toothpastes to make the idea of brushing my teeth seem more fun. I'm more likely to want to shower if I have fancy new soap, or fun shampoo. I stand a better chance of remembering to drink water if I have a cool new water bottle, etc. I just need to find ways of hitting that same chord without constantly buying new things.
Oooooo good ideas! Also buying stuff that is consumable helps with clutter, but satisfies an impulse purchase. I’ve landed on fennel toothpaste. One time I was on a trip and my friend forgot their toothpaste and I was like use mine!’ They were not happy! Lol~~
I always felt guilty for this part of me because I thought it was just terrible consumerism, so thank you for this perspective! Right now I'm on a search for a shampoo/conditioner I actually like lol
What if you cycled things out? I'm not sure how often you'd remember to do so but if you don't use the same bottles / soaps / toothpastes every day then surely it'll seem new? Or give you something to look forward to next week lol
I feel you on that one. I do. I like to experiment as well. As prices go up, it can be a fun challenge to find creative ways to optimize the things you have. A friend of mine told me tha tshe and her husband loved to eat rib eye staeks often. But the price went up. So she now buys a chuck roast, sclices the meat thick enough and cooks it as a rib eye steak, then she still has plenty of meat left over for more steaks or a pot roast, etc.
This is one of the genuine moments of seeing representation I didn't know I needed You shop exactly the way I do! I genuinely think my shopping choices make absolute sense, and I don't really understand when other people occasionally note them as unusual. Like, why wouldn't I want this super rad fidget thing? How do other people shop? But, in the same breath, watching this video makes me realize that, even though I think my behaviour makes complete logical sense, I've actually never seen someone else behave like me. Thank you! It's really nice to get to see someone like me 🙂 Many times in my life, when people've been perplexed by my behaviour - small things, like how I sit on a chair - I've first been like.. But, my behaviour makes sense? Besides social pressure, why aren't you behaving like this? And then I've been wondering - Do they see or know something I don't? Does this look different from the outside than what it feels like from the inside? Would I be weirded out if I saw someone behave like that? And then I realize that I don't actually know what it looks like from the outside, cause I've only experienced me doing it. It's so weird. So then I try to imagine what it'd look like and what I might feel in that situation, and try to understand what it must be like for others to experience from the outside, whilst trying to come up with answers for why no-one else is behaving this way, when it makes so much sense?! I've spent so much time on that mental assignment Actually being allowed to experience it from the outside is really refreshing. Then I don't have to imagine anymore. And my conclusion is that, even from the outside, I think everything you did makes complete sense. I don't think it's weird, and I'm perplexed that I haven't seen others do it. In general, it's really odd to me that other adults stop doing things that are fun just cause they're adults. Why rob yourself of fun? Interesting to hear that it appears to be a executive function thing Thank you ❤
Thank you for writing this, it really helped sum up something I've been thinking about a lot too. Since it's been brought to my attention that I most likely have ADHD, I keep wondering whether something is a 'normal' thing or an ADHD thing. It's often the latter, but even knowing that my behaviour doesn't seem abnormal. That bit where you said " Besides social pressure, why aren't you behaving like this?" really hit me! Like, how are you not obsessed with 3 different tvs shows and their respective fandoms while also having the same loop playing in your head? and like how do you not go upstairs to get the washing then proceed to forget and do like 5 other things? I legit thought everyone did these things! Thank you for writing it so clearly!
@@FoxInAShoe sometimes I wonder if people do, do those things, they just don't talk about it. I talk to so many people who have "adhd" issues. I'm beginning to think it's more common than not. I think as a society, we are so busy it makes it hard to keep up with our to do list. But it is what it is I guess!
Thank so much for this! It’s so validating! I used to really enjoy the book “7 habits for highly effective teens” when I was younger but now that I’m much older I felt I need to upgrade to the “7 habits for highly effective people” but it was so hard to get into reading it. I walked by the teen one many times at my local store debating if I should get it again and give it another read but I felt too guilty now that I’m an adult . But after watching this video and making the connection as someone with ADHD I am going to get it now😊 thank you!
Ohh I loved it when I was a kid! Lots of pictures, fun or interesting personal stories and it's much easier to read too. ...Now I have to get it from my parents' house, damn it 😂
That's a good idea. The original book always seemed too complicated to even get started. And I always check my local library's ebook collection when I want to read a book but I'm not sure about it. That way I feel like I'm not wasting my money. Or I'll download Amazon's Kindle samples.
I'm curious... does the same also apply with hobbies? For example, I still use my Legos from time to time. I sometimes feel a little weird, but I also feel like it's a part of me. A lot of people call me immature for a lot of my interests, and I wonder if what kind of reaction from neurotypical people is normal for those with ADHD as well?
im not an expert like her but i don’t think you should stop being happy once you become an adult. if legos make you happy then fuck what anyone thinks! if it doesn’t hurt anyone then enjoy it! i feel like sometimes ppl want adults to be miserable for no reason. good for you for finding things you like!
Lego is totally a thing for adults. And that is not just a marketing campain called "adults welcome". Put a box of Lego before any Millennial and sooner or later they will start building and enjoying themselves. I know that out of expirience. It is fun and creative. And we should celebrate that we kept a childish side. Life is boring enough🤣
My friend does that exact same thing at each shopping trip we take. She goes around and picks out things throughout the store, and then at the end she sits the cart down and takes out the stuff she doesn't want. I didn't know this was an ADHD thing, and it feels so good to realize that, now. I understand her better without feeling like a burden for asking. Thank you! I also have issues with cooking and your idea of using kids cookbooks is intriguing to me. My mom gave me a few "simple recipe" books long ago and I read them once. It was still too much. I may check that aisle out for both cooking and reading. I so wish I could read for pleasure.
My grandma always said there is a difference in being child like and childish and being child like is great! Also a tip for puzzles get one of those 12x12 scrapbook storage boxes than put the puzzle you are working on box and all in that container now you can build the puzzle inside the box and close it and go back to it even if you don’t finish it. That way you are less likely to lose pieces.
You can also get specific puzzle mats to roll up your puzzle on.. You do need to have some of it finished tho, cuz otherwise it will "collapse" when rolling out.. Also the puzzle needs a bit of straightening out and "mending" when rolled out.. I tried the box thing, but its much better if you dont have a lot of room.. 😁🥰 Another tip: use a sieve to get rid of some of all the "dust" that comes along from the cutting at the factory, before you do *anything* else.. As an Autistic ADHD'er, the "dust" really trigger my senses, and its annoying when sorting the pieces.. 🤐
Also, when I was admitted at a psychiatric hospital, I could do my puzzles on the floor in my room.. When the cleaning crew came along, I'd just drag the mat around to clear that specific area of floor for them.. 🤣
This is genius! I love puzzles but i never finish them in one sitting. But i get overwhelmed with trying to find a place where it can live while I’m doing it. Thank you for sharing this tip!
Thank you for this. I was diagnosed last year and have had a lot of moments where I've felt "behind" as an adult and this helps take some of that shame away. Also I'm still just kind of childlike in general and I don't really think that's a bad thing!!
PLEASE DO THIS AGAIN!!! This made me feel soooo much better about myself. I always feel embarrassed about how I love looking in the kids section for things. Getting diagnosed in my 20s meant that it was at a point where I was so good at masking it kinda hit a breaking point and now I'm trying to relearn executive functioning and coping with the fact that it's an ability lacking in my brain. Thank you so much!!
I'm a baker by profession. My hack for understanding adult recipes is I always re-write recipes I use in shorthand with arrows, parentheses, and a very minimal amount of words. I also make sure that the relevant instructions for each group of ingredients are next to those ingredients so that I don't have to keep looking back and forth between the list and a long paragraph of words at the bottom of the page. It's SO MUCH easier to read while baking. I wonder if my system would work for others with ADHD. I've thought about publishing a recipe book, but also that sounds like a whole process that I don't know how to do.
I LOVE that you made recipes more ADHD friendly and I would be very interested in any cookbook (or blog!) which wrote up recipes this way. I can't tell you how many times I have gotten part way through a recipe only to realize I forgot to prep something, or that I missed a step because I was trying to switch back and forth between the list of ingredients and the instructions. Ugh. And the incredibly long list of super specific ingredients of which I only ever have like 50 percent! And no suggestions about substitutions! Basically I ended up learning the "outline" for a couple easy recipes and just substituting in whatever I happen to have on hand because no way am I making a special shopping trip just for one recipe
I rewrite any recipe I plan on using. I can't stand that most recipes assume you can remember how much of an ingredient you need without referring to the ingredients list. Or you're supposed to just... Look at the beginning? I lose my place every time! Much easier to spend the spoons to rewrite a recipe in a format that works for me than to spend spoons trying to comprehend the original recipe.
This is also why all of my stuff is either gorgeous and “fancy” or cute (and 50/50 chance of being from the Pokémon Center); if I have to spend my time doing boring adult/bodily maintenance things, by God, I’m going to cram every scrap of dopamine into it possible. Boring stuff isn’t any cheaper, but does add insult to injury of having to spend hours a day writing notes for school or showering myself or my kid or wearing clothes or using my computer. So I use extravagant fountain pens that are beautiful, allow me to keep a constantly-changing variety of designs and inks on hand for visual interest (and color-coding!), and Pokémon-themed stationery and accessories from Japan for school (their paper quality is the best in the world and not even more expensive). I got the cutest, clickiest mechanical keyboard that I threw some craft foam in to make sound more thocky so the whole house can hear the sound of my Productivity because it’s so delightfully obnoxious and satisfying, on a huge antique desk with open and closed storage to keep my most-used items on hand (and VISIBLE so I remember that I own them!), a Master Chief controller stand as my iPad stand, and other decorative but functional stuff to make time at my desk enjoyable and productive. I only buy my sheets from the kids’ section (since I share a Full bed with my 6-year-old and he sure isn’t judging my Pikachu sheets), and my bed (when it’s made) is covered in *my* Pokémon plushes. I don’t wear boring clothes unless I’m way burned out or sick; nearly every day is some kind of themed outfit (Ms. Frizzle was more of a formative role model than I realized) because it brings me and my friends joy (and hopefully gives people more courage to dress in ways that make them happy, too). All this to say, whatever works and makes you happy is what you should be doing. There is no reason that anyone should try to avoid anything “fun” or “childish” just because they’ve circled the Sun a certain number of times, and anyone who suggest otherwise is still just trying to fit in with a boring world that doesn’t care anyway. If it’s worth doing, it’s worth enjoying!
Ayo let’s be friends because sounds like we’re twins already. It really is so helpful with ADHD to be our complete authentic selves because live is legitimately harder when we aren’t. Neurotypical people can learn from AT LEAST that. S🥰🥰
This explains why I like so many things meant for kids and teens. But also sparkles, dinosaurs, unicorns and holographic stuff is awesome and there is no reason the fun and whimsical things should be exclusive to kids and shamed for adults. Growing up and accepting dullness is lame. Play and whimsy and wonder should never be shamed out of people's lives.
I agree, it's sooo stupid... When did being cheerful, playful count as a kid thing exclusive.. I refuse to do that and really do not care what others think about like playing games, act silly, etc... Ppl should understand what really differentiates a kid from an adult... and it's not that we stop caring about our inner child, that would just brings sorrow, bitterness as we can see mostly on the older generation.
Ok but dinosaurs are amazing and I recently rediscovered my childhood obsession with dinosaurs and its so good!!! Spinosaurus is now thought to be semi aquatic!
I am very lucky to have two best friends who gets me. I'll be at the store with them, see something sparkly or whimsical, and get excited. They just laugh and support me with whatever crazy I'm up to next. I'm a sucker for anything soft, pink, sparkly, or unicorns. (and I'm 33). 😂 I love children's books too. I could be in that aisle forever if I could.
Watching a adult with ADHD a little older than me - only a few years - with the same name as me buy bath toys is just so gratifying. I'm not diagnosed yet, but it's like on a list of 10 things I'm 8 of them. I've always thought bath toys were cool and this just helps confirm that I am absolutely right! Thanks again Jessica!
I’m a retired librarian, a 74 year old with ADHD. I LOVE YA and children’s books! I have an extensive collection of each on my bookshelves. There is so much to be learned from picture books, coming-of-age stories, and books in verse. I share these with my grandkids (some ADHDers in the group) and we laugh, cry, learn, and wonder together. So happy to hear you are encouraging others to enjoy this wonderful world!
I loved seeing "The Island of the Blue Dolphins"! I re-read that book at least once a year when I feel like my mind is getting too cluttered or I'm struggling with emotional regulation. It's a short, fast read for me. Knowing what's going to happen really helps me just relax into the story. It's like a reset button for me.
Okay, so I listen to children's audio books to go to bed at night because they require limited executive function and the stories are really engaging and easy to follow. After watching this... I no longer feel shame! Here's to more children's audio books! I knew this was gonna be a good video! Thank you!! 💙🧡💙
I do as well. No suspense. A reader you love. Priceless. Like having a parent read you a bedtime story. I never had that. A short one I like (I cycle a few different ones) is Lyn Manuela-Miranda (hope I spelled that right?!) "Goodmorning Goodnight" I think it is called.
My MFA is in writing for kids and Young Adults and it is a GREAT genre for anyone. It's faster Paced and the characters experience emotions intensely and now that I think about it they're often impulsive too... maybe you're in to something!
I prefer YA fiction because a lot of adult fiction isn’t as fun to me. I’d never go back to high school myself (you couldn’t pay me to go through that again!) but reading some fictional high school drama can be nostalgic sometimes.
Love this. I stopped caring years ago but understand that the shame is still there for a lot of people, especially when people have had what being an "adult" means hammered into them. I'm glad I was raised by my mom who is a total nerd and likes things that others might consider "childish." Live your best life, or create it by playing DnD 😸
I would actually love a series on this. Since living alone I find it so hard to look after myself properly but if I found ways to make it 'fun' like this video I'd probably be better
Yet another amazing video breaking down huge barriers for ADHD people. I absolutely agree, I use a lot of “kids” stuff to help myself regulate and enjoy life. I love stickers and they help me get stuff done, I love dice and toys for fidgeting…the list goes on. Thank you for normalizing this!!!
Re: adult coloring books - I like the idea of coloring books, but my perfectionism tells me I'm going to "mess up" the fancy adult ones. Less complicated coloring books meant for kids might be the solution, thanks for the idea!
if it helps you get reassured, many of us adhders also have less than normal hand/eye coordination so when i color i usually go over spots ^^" i get some liquid eraser (idk what it's called in english) or use the undo buttons when it's digital!! also obviously digital painting is less hurtful when i go over the lines because i can erase it quickly and easily
This is one of the reasons why I paint my nails bright glittery colours. They're a great visual fidget and I love watching the light sparkle off them, it's soothing and stimulating at the same time. I just have to be careful not to get lost just staring at my nails for half an hour 😅
The thing I do with writing recipes is to: -Have one instruction per line -Have each quantity put in the relevant instruction lines (in addition to being in the ingredient list) -Put things in the actual order of time (so no need to scramble to work out what needs to be done when)
Thank you for making this channel! My husband and my daughter both have pretty intense ADHD and it’s really hard as a wife and mom to not default to “Why can’t you ______!” But I’m determined to make sure my daughter learns about her brain and how to live and have a life she enjoys, and also to be a wife that really helps my husband and supports him the way he needs without feeling like I just have to “make up” for the things he doesn’t do. THANK YOU!!
Thank you for your perspective and thinking critically about how you relate to the brains in your life. There are things that we have to restructure for the most success, but there's also many awesome things that come to us naturally that people without adhd admire. Best of luck on your journey :)
Such a good concept. Since I've gotten to the age of like 14 even (I'm 22) I've started to be ashamed about liking things made for kids (I've always been more childish as a person, trauma maybe too?). Years and an ADHD diagnosis later, I've started to re-accept my childish side and realize that if I can make things fun, I'll actually want to do them, therefore it makes it worth it to have "childish" things. Slowly I'm stopping the shame more and more and honestly starting to enjoy life more again which is amazing. Crazy how much just treating yourself nicely and getting things to make your barriers less of an issue really really helps your mental health
I love this video! No one ever talks about this and i feel better knowing i shouldn’t feel ashamed for buying stuff from the kids section. Like i know it doesn’t harm anyone and it helps me but having other confirm it helps me feel less ashamed And shopping videos are also just really fun to watch
1. In my bullet journal I put a little sticker next to the day when I do All the Things. It's so motivating! Not just to do the things, but to not load my day up with an impossible list of tasks. 2. On the Headspace meditation app, I love the Kids exercise on Focus, because instead of focusing on an object in the room or your breath, you focus on a pretty sound that slowly fades to silence. I don't know why the adult focus exercises don't use this, since many people are more auditory than visual.
"trying so hard to meet the standards that everyone else is holding us to" crying now, thanks haha. i'm not a people pleaser but with my girlfriend it's what makes me happy, seeing her happy and up until recently I've sort of disregarded myself instead of balancing the two out. your channel gives me an absolute rollercoaster of emotion. i'm being tested soon. thanks so much for helping me catch this at 19 instead of 20 years down the line. :)
I often struggle with shame from feeling immature in relation to some of the close and accomplished people in my life, both friends and family. I sometims wish I had more friends like yourself. You always make me feel so heard.
I took my daughter to the bookstore about a month ago, and I was walking around the kids/young adults section, and man, those books looked so much more fun than anything in the adults section. I’ve been actually collecting old books from series I started but never completed as a kid, like Keys to the Kingdom by Garth Nix and the Pendragon series by DJ Machale, and they are really fun. I’ve read a few adult series and enjoyed them, like Dresden Files, Magic Ex Libris and Monster Hunter International, but overall it’s hard for me to find something interesting in the adult section of fiction literature, so going back to the books I read as a kid has been fun.
LOVE LOVE LOVE Garth Nix books. If you want something still YA but slightly higher level than Keys to the Kingdom, the Abhorsen series is amazing. I almost named my firstborn Sabriel 😆
@@MorriAelthyn I’ve heard good things about Sabriel, but I’m not a huge high fantasy fan. For some reason it’s really hard for me to get into high fantasy novels, even if I really like the concepts. The only one I can remember really getting into was the Eli Monpress series. I read through the first three books in an omnibus, but I still need to read the last two.
@@denycast yes. I’ve read up to Wednesday or Thursday if I remember right. I bought the books last year then stopped reading after a bit. I really like them. It sort of reminds me of a more ordered Alice in Wonderland. The different places In the House that the main character goes to are pretty imaginative, but it’s all bogged down in bureaucracy. It’s interesting to see the different worlds and what not.
This came at a great time for me - I've been angsting about my more "childish" habits and tastes, and it did my heart good to see you enjoying and using the tools and games aimed at children and young people. I remembered just today that I learned all my html skills from a website created by a kid!
I did too!! Then all the CSS I did learn I learned, usually, by asking fellow kids and learning from their codes. And glad the video hit at a good time for you
@@lv9265 I so wish I could! Unfortunately a lot of what I used to use I've either forgotten or eventually was taken down likely due to someone no longer paying for the domain name. But I definitely recommend looking for HTML/CSS for Kids on google, youtube, or checking out the HTML/CSS for kids books at a bookstore or library! Then using whatever clicks with your brain!
I still feel a bit childish for my age, I still play video games, watch cartoons, browse the web, watch streams, I liked toy cars until I was a teenager. People have told me that im childish and that I need to grow up at times. I do have meltdowns like a child at times when I get stressed. Im also Neurodivergent too(autism, undiagnosed adhd). Glad that I'm not alone with this at all, thank you!!!!
The reality check is my favorite feature of online shopping. By putting some distance between myself and the temptations, and having the cart keep a running total for me, I make MUCH better choices and spend less money overall, especially when I put off checking out for a day or two. The main dopamine come from the shopping, not the buying, anyway.
Yeah, I much prefer online shopping. I can look at the price of my total shop and ask myself "Is there anything I can buy later/next time?" And in most places they'll let you add a product to a different list. And there's a good chance I'll forget about that list, so I didn't really need the thing to begin with and added it on impulse. :P
Raise your hand if on a weekly basis you fill an online cart and don’t submit it because you forgot or because it’s a strategy to control impulsive shopping! 🤚🏽😄
"The main dopamine comes from the shopping, not the buying, anyway." 😂 Seriously! My friend and I will have a conversation that goes "What'd you do today?" "Oh, just went pretend shopping." "Find anything good?" "Yup, it's hanging out in my cart". We do it because we're poor, but I never thought of how the fun really is in the finding and picking out, not the actual stuff. I always go back and click "Save for Later" on a bunch of it, only to look at that list later and not even remember why I wanted something, lol. That reality check has saved me boatloads of overwhelm in how to organize even more stuff than I already have.
@@ArtzyZero this is actually a really cool idea ty, if it's something I genuinely do want then I'll remember to go back & buy it, if not.. delete months/years later when I randomly come across it !
Thank you for this! My desk is covered in fidget toys, but after watching this, I realize that I'd been keeping away from kids' toys just for the reason that I'm an adult and "shouldn't" use them. This video really broke down some barriers for me. :)
I read SO MUCH young adult stuff and used to be ashamed of it, but it was literally the only type of books I could comprehend and stay focused on. I also love slime as a fidget
Love this! I already get stim toys from kids' aisles, but I hadn't thought to look for things like kids' cookbooks, water bottles, toothbrushes, etc. Such a great tip. I have a tip that's more autism/sensory related: if you're averse to mint toothpaste, try kids' toothpaste in another flavor like bubblegum, strawberry, etc. I used to get nauseous every time I brushed my teeth but now I don't!
omg! I hate mint toothpaste! I have never heard of anyone else not liking mint toothpaste and I was reading through these comments and found like 2 or 3 people were talking about how they don't like mint either. I need to know what else we have in common now, so weird! :)
I like that you mention reading young adult books. It’s very helpful for me and they are less demanding. They also use simpler words and as someone who struggles with reading and comprehension(undiagnosed dyslexia, it makes me feel more motivated. This is SO HELPFUL!
I have a 6 year old boy. Some of the books that we have geared for him (and a bit older) are absolutely beautiful in their simplicity and explanation. Make me want to cry at times, they're so beautifully simple and effective.
The most ADHD-friendly modern fantasy series has to be: The Dresden Files. It's all first person, so you never have to adapt to a new perspective. The sentences are short, clear and informative. I can easily knock out a whole book in a few hours.
God, I read one of them... and maybe it was one of the worse, but I really did not like it... so much exposure, it felt overdone and clumsy. But I really like the RPG to the Dresden Files. I love Terry Prattchet as an easy engaging read, and reread. And the Ghostsitter series by Tommy Krappweis really rocks.
I just started rereading Storm Front for the nth time last night. It makes fir interesting bed time reading. I find myself looking for details or clues that relate to other books in the series to try to identify where the next book will go. Usually fail, but he has my attention. I picture Dresden as resembling a friend of mine that's about the same height and has a similar fatalistic view of life. I do not plan to tell him this either. The Dresden Files are fun reading. (So is anything by Terry Pratchett or Hillerman, Tony or Anne.)
For the writers who read this: The author, Jim Butcher, had a kickass a how-to-write guide on his Lifejournal page once upon a time. It might be still up. Mr. Butcher's text taught me some writing skills that I haven't found mentioned anywhere else since then. And I've been actively looking!
Totally different fantasy, it's paranormal horror comedy fantasy, but Fred the Vampire Accountant could work for you. The books a separated in 5 parts that each have their own story arc but something overarching to make the books feel like one book. The dry humor and Fred's voice take a bit of getting used to though and if you don't like books that read like diaries you might want to skip it. It's not blatant in the entire books but there are some moments where it's clear that Fred writes the stories in his diary after the fact (which sometimes include stuff like: I wasn't there so the next part is written by such and such character to give a complete view of the situation). The inclusion of some myths like sasquatch and a bunch of human shifter that aren't wolves (and also dragons) just makes it more fun. I love the world building in the books. About the Dresden Files: man the male gaze is real in at least the first and second noves and the first couple shorts in between them. That's my biggest drawback, also that I knew who did it in book 1 before the character was introduced on page. Because he's mentioned with suspicion before that. I love detectives though, it's partly a nostalgia thing and paranormal detectives are extra fun to me. They feel like comfort reads because of the nostalgia for detective stories I have and the fact paranormal stuff is relatively easy to understand compared to my fave political fantasies. If I have the focus and right head space though, I do an audiobook of a complex fantasy on like double speed and a jigsaw puzzle at the same time. But right now I can't really do either. I need simpler stories so I revert to romance instead.
thank you for this!! i'm one of those people whose hyperfixations almost always involve some sort of book/movie/tv show that's supposedly "for kids", and this video helped me remember that that's nothing to be ashamed of ☺️ also, anyone else here who realized that "kid's media" these days can often be just as complex and deep as adult media?
This video like some of your others bring tears to my eyes. I just thought I wasn't good or smart enough to do certain things, but now I'm understanding WHY and really just how much I was struggling with so many things. I'm 47, unmedicated, & un-officially ADHD and only found out about my own ADHD because I was in college working for an early childhood education degree 2 years ago. (My husband has it & was medicated & apparently many others knew I was,, but I never saw it in me.) I love reading kids books, coloring, playing with toys, LOVE stuffed animals, throw blankets, textures, & finished my first year teaching 4 yr old preschool....and I love it. The attention span is perfect for me in not needing to go so in depth with lessons. Thank you for your videos. I'm continuing to watch more. Even while watching I have found that I have to remind it, but please know just how much you are helping reassure & teach me in a more positive way about myself. God bless you always.
This made me cry a little bit. The YA books, the bath toys. Then at the end, putting everything in the basket... it looked like my shopping cart. I felt so seen. I have bath toys, a bubble gun, colorful and bright *everything*. This channel has changed my life in the last six months, and this was just like the big emotional cherry on top. I really appreciate normalizing buying children's toys for the ADHD brain.
Awesome video! Apart from lowering demand on executive function, I especially love the idea of "making boring things fun". I think that would benefit everyone, not just people with ADHD. I've only just started even thinking about that, f.ex. listening to music while doing chores, drawing cute doodles on reminders or shopping lists etc. It makes me smile and gives me a break from the tedious everyday boringness :)
The reality check at the end is always what does me in. I've overcompensated for the impulsivity of "I want this and this and this" by being able to talk myself out of buying anything, even if it is something I really should be getting
That... that is very relatable! It can be hard finding that middle ground. Takes practice, I think. And when you do put something away that you needed... figuring out why you put it back and learning from the mistake... as a way to kind of carve out the middle ground. That's what helped me anyway... I hope that maybe it can help you! At the very least know that you're deeeefinitely not alone!
Yes yes yes!!! Sticker charts always helped me and when I told my therapist, she got weirded out and told me that that’s a kid’s thing. I don’t care though as long as it works :3 Besides, I’ve always been more “kiddish” anyway:) Thank you for this video!! It means a lot to see that other ADHDers are the same way❤️✨
I thought that way too. But I am bad at keeping things going. So my alternative is Habit Hunter, a RPG. Its an app. But games are my thing at 50 years old.
@@elanorglf Bad at keeping going? Me too! Always starting a thing and finding it uninteresting after a week or a month. I strove for years to come up with methods of organization I can stick with. Sticker charts are not it! But I do have an excel table with bar chart i’ve been feeding for a while, maybe it’ll click :)
I related to this so much. My favorite genres to read are middle grade and YA. I still have a bunch of plushies, and still love Disney and Pokemon. These things are such a big part of emotional regulation for me. Using things for kids is helpful in a lot of ways, and it was really cool to see this video. ☺️
This video is so helpful. I particularly struggle with Eaton meals or knowing what to eat due to my ADHD and body insecurity, and never thought to look at kids snacks or cookbooks. It’s something that others may not understand, but for me this is a game changer. Thank you for always giving these simple tips that make life for fellow ADHDers easier. Also when it comes to reading- COMIC BOOKS! I used to love to read even YA books but it’s hard for me to focus on those. I find that visuals and shorter amounts of text are best, and so I’m even working on writing my own comic book (my friends have a bet on when it will actually happen, cause you know, getting things done) but yeah I highly recommend comics for anyone who has trouble with books, they can tell fantastic stories and even give you a better understanding of characters you know from the movies etc.
I think that whatever you find that works for you, is adult friendly! Also, when it comes to emotions, when we were little the resources, tools and understanding of emotions wasn’t as sophisticated as it is now. I’m pro learning from the books you have for emotions!
This is great! I'm a drama and movement therapist and work with lots of kids and teenagers with all sorts of life challenges. A lot of them seem to have complex diagnoses which include ADD/ADHD and we use a lot of the same toys/tools to support them at any age. Even pet toys can be helpful sometimes for sensory stimulation!!
Oooh I should check out the pets section for stim toys! I've been wondering where tf you buy them aside from online. I haven't seen them in supermarkets. Or maybe I couldn't recognise them? Honestly I haven't been to a supermarket for a while.
One thing I’ve gotten from Target to help with my studying/note taking for college are colorful erasable pens. I love how smooth and bright they are but that I can basically use them like a pencil. Love them ✌🏼
I have learned more about understanding, accepting, and living with ADHD in this channel than I did while majoring in psychology and biology, and even now in med school. So I wanted to say thank you with as much gratitude as you can imagine because you have alleviated a great deal of hardship that is often difficult to express. I’m currently going through my second year of medical school where research is expected if not required, which can be grueling without ADHD. I lucky to be working on a project that I am passionate about, or else I wouldn’t be able to pull my fair share of work within the time limits. Reading through literature has been hard and I often find myself procrastinating and feel ashamed afterwards without realizing the reasons for the procrastination. The part of the video about dry adult books resonated me, while giving me comfort and helping me understand my behavior.
I bought myself the Burst toothbrush and it pauses the vibration when it’s time to brush a different part of your mouth. Then shuts off automatically after two minutes of brushing. Super convenient and useful for me. 😋 I unfortunately had to throw away all of my sons bath toys that squirt water because they developed mold in them.
Okay so I LOVE THIS!! Since becoming an adult, I’ve struggled reading adult appropriate books as much as I would love too. I have felt shame in reading young adult books since I am no longer a young adult even though I was more interested in their storylines and they were easier to read, process and follow along. I really love this!! This gives me motivation to read more again which I have been craving for YEARS!!
Thank you for putting yourself out there to show the struggles of what we struggle with sensory wise and that adults deal with and don't talk about. It's OK to do tasks and activities that are geared for kids, it will make us more productive in the other areas of our lives we struggle with.
Thanks so much for making this video! I don't have ADHD but I am neurodiverse and relate to a lot of this video. We shouldn't have to give up things when we're older just because they're considered for kids. If it helps us and makes us happy, there's nothing wrong with it
I teach a social emotional curriculum in preschool and have used those Little Spot books! They're awesome. Also, teaching 5 year olds how to identify and regulate their emotions has helped me immensely. It's like I'm learning with them!
Oh this explains so much I'm almost 45 years old and i currently have a huge collection of stationary , most of it very "childish" for my Bullet journal. You know with pokemons, pixis, dragons and so on... God to know that this makes some sense . Thank you so much!!
Couple of things. It goes for kids too! My 10 year old needed permission from himself and me to use things and watch shows for younger kids and he's much better for it. State champion runner, most challenging kid in the school but loves bluey, charlie and Lola, and pepper pig. Big kid shows from 7-730 and preschool shows from 730 to 8. Works wonders for his sleep. Biggest thing was chewing and sucking. He chewed his shirt to pieces while stressing before school. He eventually stopped but he was then always late or refused to go. I got him chews but he didn't like them. We had a 3 year old with the same name as him for a week (We're a foster family). He saw me bottle feeding him and, due to the name, imagined himself. He asked if he could have a baby bottle too. Has had one every morning and night for two months and he's on time to every day and arrives in a much better mood. School asked if I had increased his meds. Dentist dubious but said it won't harm his teeth. Psychologist cheered as it addresses trauma issues too. And kids books are much better written then adult books. They can't waste time with pointless filler so have to keep the story running. My mates an adult fantasy author and reads kids novels as he says they are some of the only good books being written.
Absolutely love and appreciate this video! I always get lost in target at the Bullseye section..so many cool fidgets and learning manipulatives. I think becoming an elementary teacher has really helped me embrace my ADHD. I'm so glad I found your channel.. I watched your ted talk a few years ago and it made me more confident with my "gift"!
I’m obsessed with puzzles! My mom works at a place that sells a lot of small company puzzles and she’ll come home and bring me a new one. It’s the only time I can really listen to a podcast without getting bored.
Until pretty recently I was a nanny/nursery teacher/babysitter/etc and it was so fulfilling and taught me so much. Learning about child development, helping kids through big emotions (even if it was about a zipper that "didn't work"), mediating issues between kids, and answering/trying to answer their questions really changed how I thought about a lot of things. I definitely learned the stuff in this video too; kids stuff is great! It's easy to use, super cute, and usually pretty tough. One of my favorite sensory-friendly kids things: non-mint toothpastes! Non-ADHD related tip: if you (like me) have really small feet, always check and see if you can get the shoes you're looking at from their kid's line. They're often the exact same shoes but cheaper!
I feel as an adult with adhd and asd, I used to read a lot, even if I didn't understand the context. But as I got older, even after I really gotten into reading with I got kindle account, I felt I lost some reading skills as I got older and more aware of my disabilities. But when I got into podcasts and audiobooks, it made reading so much easier. Granted, most adult books, especially old one's, are still hard to get through. So, I still have to find one's that only interest me but also keeps my attention. Like I was once listening to Hyperion and it was.... so boring. Granted, it was a full cast and had great voice acting. But... it felt... so slow. And it was only a few minutes from the start. Sometimes, there's just some that didn't work for me even though I wanted them to.
There is nothing wrong with just reading/listening to what is fun. And maybe its less that you are more aware of your disability, but that adult live is more taxing on you then childhood was. When you allready used up all your energy and focus for the day, how could anyone expect you to read something? If you ever should come into the situation that you need a " short version" of whats in a book, because you just can't get through the whole thing, you might find blinkist interesting. I consider to get it for a month or so, to get through some super dry medical books that conrain interesting knowledge but I could never read in full.
Oh dude, the slowness thing is DREADFUL- every audiobook/podcast I listen to is on 1.25-1.5 speed, it definitely helps (but obvi not if the story itself is boring lol)
Thank you for making this video! I like my apartment to look really "adult", so I don't end up using a lot of things that could really be helpful because they look too "childish". However, this made me realize that there is no shame in using things that are "for kids" if they work for my ADHD brain!
I am crying as I watch your videos as so much is making sense to me. Almost everything you pointed out are the things I find myself fidgeting with in store. Using stickers for organization and reminders has become my life since I discovered it. I need so many organization tools in order to adult.
I love reading kids books. I just ordered a set of books that I read as a preteen. I enjoyed it so much that I ordered the next series. It has occasional pictures and the story is easy to understand. I've also bought adult coloring books for the past two years and it helps me self soothe. Now I know why I love doodling and coloring. Stickers are soooo hard to find lately. I'm glad you found some. I do the "rethink/reevaluate thing" at the end of every shopping trip before I checkout. It takes extra time but it also helps me decide what's worth it, what's needed, and also prevents me from overspending. This feels so freeing to see someone else shop and act like I do.
Thank you for making this video! I am a preschool teacher with ADHD and I have found a lot of the toys meant for the children is calming to me. Thank you for taking the shame away from using things that are meant for children.
I remember when between somewhere around 5th grade to 6th grade, we stopped having math "workbooks," which had exercises in the book, that you write on in the book, and you turn in the book to your teachers -- to the system where: you are supposed to copy the problem onto a piece of your own ruled paper, and then solve the problem on the paper, with no prompts or structure -- and thinking: "This is objectively terrible! What does this have to do with learning the actual material? Why is this happening? Why are we making this harder, in a way that has nothing to do with the actual material?" And then as I was getting older, I realized, "They are putting more and more impediments to learning in the way, all the way up through grad school."
Not to downplay your frustrations but over here at least it's done to save money. Each department has a budget for the year. Say a classroom holds 30 students. It's cheaper to buy 30 textbooks and have them for years, rather than 30 that only get used once because a student has written the answers on every page. I'm speaking from my knowledge of UK schools so things may be different where you're from. But even in first school this was the case. Even colleges often expect you to buy your own supplies where possible.
Two of my kids have ADHD - 24 and 21yo and I appreciate your videos because I can better understand what they are going thru each day. The sleep thing really gets both of them. thanks!
I am so glad I am not the only one who does this. I used to struggle in certain subjects but childrens books made them so much clearer with pictures, quick concise language, and real world examples. Even the "For Dummies" type books for adults couldn't hold my attention for too long.
I do sudoku puzzles to relax. I also love puzzles, but if they have small pieces I get bored and lose pieces. My favorite puzzle was one that functioned as a coloring page the first time you finished putting it together.
@@HowtoADHD basically all my books 😅. But some of my fave books have been the series by Chris Colfer. And Ally Carter. I also still like twilight (partly coz it was the 1st books I actually enjoyed reading), hunger games.
Last week when I was at Target, I went into the arts and crafts aisle because of course I did 😂 I found a book of blank stickers in all kinds of shapes so you can make your own stickers! I couldn’t get anything extra that day but I think I’m gonna grab it when I go tomorrow. I can can make useful stickers and ones just for fun!
I'm a future Social Worker and these books look AMAZING!! I'm definitely going to need some of these for my future office!! Also...pretty sure my sister has ADHD and so I'm starting to learn more about it. Thanks for the great content!
I work at a pediatric office, there have been several times that my fellow neurodivergent coworkers have gone in the toy box to use like a stress ball, or the colored water drippy toy thing. Great for boring phone calls. Stressful days etc
I'm so glad to see a video on this!! I get embarrassed using stuff in public that's so obviously kid-intended for my ADHD/autism. And resting without doing anything is a total nightmare, which people can't seem to understand. I'm gonna check out those kids books on emotions. Also loved how you went through your basket before checking out. Definitely something I need to do more often! 😁
I love this, I am a teenager, yet for some reason I still feel ashamed to use things meant for teenagers, so while it would probably be so helpful for my brain I just make things harder for myself and avoid it..
I just need to say thank you so much for what you do. I've learned more about myself from just watch a few of your videos than I have my 28 years in this world. I can't stress how much I've come to understand things about myself since watching your videos and just wanted to let you know even if you don't like or comment on this I just hope you see this so you know how much you are appreciated. Again thank you and have a great day.
I was always thinking this, everytime I want to learn something I always look for the kids version as it's easier to understand and translate into the real world for me. If something is too technical and keeps me frustrated and zoned out then I just try the easier version which is for kids
The technical aspects, especially in my job , is why I am so happy to have things like RUclips to explain to visual and tactile learners like myself! I also zone out when things keep me frustrated or are too technical to break down
I really appreciate how the sponsors are at the end of the video instead of in the beginning or middle, it's very ADHD friendly. I always hated other vids that put sponsorships in between and make me lose focus.
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Slacker! I had time to watch the video before you posted this! 😂😉
Please do a video on how to Ace a Job Interview...
Your a awsome person i have been trying your brain times love them thanks
Hello sweetheart
Hey is there any way that you could make a video on how to defend yourself without sounding defensive? Anyways I love your videos! you’re always so encouraging!!💖
The way I explain it to my mom is that having ADHD is like trying to parent a five year old but you are also the five year old, so you just get things that make things easier for the five year old part of the brain so that the parent part of the brain can get things like cooking and cleaning and work done
I am a 65 year old with newly discovered ADHD. AND I have a 19 year old moving in with me. A challenge
Best definition I've seen so far.
I got lost reading this comment, and started think about something else. I must have severe adhd
I realized that most people with adhd tend to be age reggressors! witch honestly makes a lot of sense, specially as myself being both an age reggressor and someone with adhd
yes! i always feel like there are two people in my brain: the mom that tells me to do things, and the child that won't listen
A LOT of us with ADHD have had a good bit of childhood trauma.
Forced to grow up early, or judged unfairly for being "too childish" when we are actually just "child-LIKE".
Embracing the parts of us that are, functionally, still children, and nurturing that piece of you is always a good thing.
Go climb a tree!
Go play on a playground, or go to the zoo, or the kids science museum.
It is good for your soul!
PICK SOMETHING!
Something you haven't done since you were a kid, or always wanted to do as a kid, and just fucking do it!
In addition to all the obvious psychological ways it can help, it is just good for your soul.
If anyone asks you what you are doing, a grown-ass human being playing with kids stuff, tell them "It's good for your brain. You should try it too."
Yes!
Can confirm that going to the zoo as an adult because it seems fun is a *wonderful* and healing experience.
We went the other week, and took my little, and just had a super chill time following the paths and experiencing the zoo with no pressure.
Yeah, I got bullied by some of the girls in my 5th grade class for still playing pretend. I couldn't understand why it was wrong to pretend when I was still a kid. Now I write novels (nothing published yet) because I never have wanted to give up pretending. Why be stuck with my boring life when I can imagine being someone else doing living a different one?
I seriously want to go tree climbing now... I used to be really good at it when I was a kid.
I love how our parents raised us when it came to ADHD. My mom has ADHD and knew her kids would probably inherit it before we came along, so we grew up knowing our diagnosis before we were even officially diagnosed. We always had loads of fidget toys, puzzles, quiet books for times where we had to be less rowdy, no one was ever pressured to be age appropriate with toys or books, and finding something that helped was celebrated. This continued as adults and was passed on to the new generation. My nieces and nephews got me addicted to the Gerald and Piggy books. I'm in my forties, they're meant for five year olds, and I have no shame about it. A good book is a good book. I always feel so lucky to have my family who are just amazingly supportive of each other. I think having such a strong family support is what allowed us to be so blasé about it when the rest of the world doesn't understand us. I would love to help everyone destigmatize this sort of thing, really glad you have this video.
Wow, that's wonderful! It's so great to hear of a positive growing up with ADHD experience, especially from that time period.
I grew up around the same time, but wasn't diagnosed, so my experience was rather different. My family was/is supportive in general, but they just didn't understand me. I learned to embrace my uniqueness and not to feel shame, but it took a lot of time and emotional work.
This... makes me so happy to read. I'm so happy for you and your family. 🥲
I loved reading this
As an adult i have a glitter wand, tangle toy and soft pink ostrich at my desk. I love my toys! The wand helps when I get mad! I love my local toy store!
reading your comment makes me feel a lot better about wanting to read a middle-grade book I've been recently interested in! I'm 21 now and was always reading books way above my grade level so it made me feel like I wasn't "reaching my potential" by going for a book targeted towards a younger audience. But you're right - a good book is a good book, so I shouldn't feel ashamed about it. Thank you
I love that you're normalizing buying "kid" stuff as an adult. My husband makes fun of my cute bandaids and sticker collection "problem", but I don't see why we shouldn't buy things that make us happy if we can afford it and it doesn't hurt anyone. I love fidget tools, creative projects/art supplies, and comfort items like stuffed animals. So what if my water bottle has Disney characters? At least I am drinking water!
I’ve started doing this I’m 28 and find stuff with fun colors I’m more likely to use like pens and band aids and toothbrush
Tell your husband he's being a killjoy lol
Ah, hello 👋🙂 kindred spirit
I really don’t understand why doing more “kid” things as an adult is stigmatized. Who cares if you’re goofy or need to sleep with a stuffed animal at night because you need to hug something and temperature regulate with your spouse? I used to be so ashamed, and it’s ridiculous. The world is hard enough that things that bring you joy that don’t harm other people shouldn’t be stigmatized.
He shouldn't be making fun of things that make you happy and calling it a "problem." That's whack
"I tend to like things that are smaller because they are less overwhelming."
I hear you, girl. I'm right there with you.
The more Mini the better🎉
That's what she literally said
I guess that's why at 6 years old I chose stuffed mouse less in size and without talking abilities than the mouse my mum offered me at first🤔
@@morandi9inna9marius one yes little stuffed mice are cute
Same!
I love your "reality check" on the items you put in your basket at the end! I do this a lot when I go shopping because it helps me manage my impulsivity and I can reflect on whether I really need the items as I walk around, but some people I shop with get annoyed when I walk around with an item for the entire trip and then decide I don't want it. It also helps me save money and makes me feel less guilty later on about unnecessary spending.
I do this a lot with Sensory things specifically. Stuffed animals or squeeze balls etc. I get the hit of "mine" and then can rationalize a little better by the end of the trip if I "actually" want it or not.
I do this too. I put stuff back when I see how much I have altogether.
Yes, this! It's also a reason I prefer to use a hand basket rather than a cart, because it makes me evaluate whether I want something enough to carry it around.
Esp for online shopping
I do this too!
I love this, there's no need for us to be ashamed of using things that are meant for 'kids', if it makes our lives easier and more fun, why not?
Agreed ! I find way to many adults books have SO MUCH violence in them and that is NOT relaxing. If it's violence in a "Hobbit" film, it's not as disturbing!
I want intelligent characters, interesting stories & nothing like the "Real" world, which I am pretty 'done' with lately, lol !
I laugh out loud when I read my daughter’s Dog Man books over her shoulder. Bonus points to Dav Pilkey for having a character named “80-HD”👍
@@manzelli1981 would you recommend them to an adhd adult?
I think that's where I started reading light novels and the books listed as LitRPG. they're like the young adult novels, only aimed for the teen through 99 audience, so it's not just the comming of age type stories where (at this point) I get bored of the umm...lack of knowledge that actually seems obvious for an adult- (of course you should...) but stories about adults put into fantastical situations and how they deal. My favortite recently would be the Ten Realms books by Micheal Chatfield. Excellent story that is with adult characters, making adult decisions, but doesn't have the gratutios bleh that novels usually found in the "grown up" section of book stores have.
@@m.maclellan7147 so true, I mostly just read Middle-Grade books and YA sometimes, why should I bother myself with books where adults are just suffering and are similar to our world...
I’m nearly 60 years old, and I read comic books, do LEGO sets, and play Dungeons & Dragons. Now, most of this stuff is cool, but for decades, it’s been frowned upon as “immature.” I realize now that most of these hobbies are things I’ve stuck with because for me, they are either ADHD-friendly or promote my executive functioning by learning new ways to get things done. Well, and their all very imaginative, and I love using my creativity! 😊
Sounds super fun I’m Neurodiverse and would totally be up for that I’m 41
You are AWESOME!!!
Pathfinder 2e is really ADHD friendly for GMs in my experience since 1. the rule set doesn't require inventing the missing half of the system (where I get bogged down in the details and forget to actually prep the session), and the adventure paths have good structure, so if I forgot to prep until last minute, it's ok; most of what I need is already there.
I’m an adult with ADHD and a nurse working on my masters degree. I recently had a day where I was melting down because I just absolutely could not focus on my paper that was due in just a few hours. I walked around a store, bought myself a giant sketch pad, pack of markers, and a koosh ball - and I took those with me and got the paper done ✅
Well done! Good thinking!
Having ADHD was one of my super powers as a pediatric nurse. I got kids in a way that my co workers who didn't have ADHD did not
As someone who's passionate about children's media and how we connect to it, I really appreciate that the ADHD community aren't ashamed of liking children's products!
Here's some advice though: don't take 8 - 13 age range books lightly. Some of them can be *very* hard-hitting or depressing, so try not to dismiss them as "easy reading" just because the text is easy to read.
> try not to dismiss them as "easy reading" just because the text is easy to read.
I'm almost sure I understood what you're trying to say: "a story can be both emotionally heavy and told with simple language". Is that an accurate restatement?
[edit: quoted the contextual part of the paragraph instead of just the beginning.]
@@jonaskoelker I think that’s what was meant here. For example, one of my favorite books is a YA novel and the story is very heavy. It’s about a girl whose father abandons her and whose mother intentionally ran out in front of an ambulance to end her life during her pregnancy with the girl, obviously she survives, but her mother does not. No one in her family will get close to her because their too busy protecting the family secret that her mothers death was never an accident. First read it when I was 12.
Yes, the prose is easy to get through since it’s written for younger readers, but obviously very heavy subject matter. I still love it though having been a traumatized kid myself.
Yes, that was my comment's intention. My apologies if the comment might have been misconstrued, I wasn't in the right headspace when I wrote it.
The point isn't that the text is easy to read. The point is that they're hard hitting and depressing lol. Adult books are less emotion grabbing and more matter of fact sometimes. So boring.
@@unicornlover1237 No need to apologize, I just wanted to increase clarity. I like clarity. A lot. It's a me thing ;-)
Last Month I bought a book about local myths and legends clearly made for kids -but I loved it! The illustrations are cute and pretty, the stories are short enough for me to read one or two without getting overwhelmed or bored and the creepier stories are written in a way that wont disturb me xD 10/10 would recommend!
I love that children things are less disturbing... i can't watch anything that is Pegi 16 😅
YES! I love books like that. What is the book called? Mythology is one of my favorite subjects
Yes!! This is why 90% of the time, I only watch kids shows. Things always end happy and nothing is too creepy:)
@@cathuff5802 as I'm from Germany the book is a german one and I dont think its available in english. The Title is "Hessische Sagen für Kinder" by Elke Leger (translates to something like "Hessian legends for children")
I've always been into mythology I have to check this out
This really strikes a chord with me . I’m nearly 50 n a few years and I look around and see my ‘peers’ with all these mature ‘adult’ hobbies and I’m still into the same stuff I liked when I was a teenager. Comics, table top games, models, geek stuff! I think I must be immature but it just makes my brain happy, I like it! Life is tough with ADHD, hell my job is tough and I don’t want to have to feel ashamed that my interests are still, well, what I was into when I was a kid!
We do need to have nights where us ND individuals get together and play tabletop games
Your hobbies are great! And sound affordable.
This sounds awesome! Hobbies are just things you enjoy, whatever they are is valid!
We have the same first name too lol
@@Lkat. Man I love neurodivergent people, they're always just so damn supportive, it's like they just get it lol!
Don’t be ashamed for finding you in something that does absolutely no harm! You seem to be someone fun to be around :)
Young adults/teenagers/older kids stories often have more adventures, less stupid drama, and make more sense, especially character's actions. Story comes from the world around, not from characters not able to grow up like grownups should and talk to each other, or just doing something completely illogical for plot reasons.
THIS is probably why I prefer YA genre more.
Yes!
100% agree! I'm glad to hear someone else feels that way: I was wondering if I was alone in this. :)
Characters in most non-Young Adult "Contemporary Fiction" act in the strangest ways: like they need to generate problems for there to be a story. It reminds me of reality TV shows: neither feel "real" or interesting to me. I think Young Adult fiction doesn't do that because kids and young adults have a pretty good BS filter and won't put up with that.
Other genres (fantasy, sci-fi, etc..) generally have other forces moving the plot and generating conflict, so the characters have clear motivations. It's like acting: the most realistic actions come when are when you are reacting to the world around you.
Yeah. I realised a few years ago the reason i love YA fantasy series is because of the focus on adventures. Which is also the reason i loved the three musketeers, Jules Verne's Extraordinary Voyages and LOTR/The Hobbit as a kid.
Thiss, this so much. Similar to series for me, the first season or 2 will be world/antagonists vs characters but then they so often devolve into solely character conflict, the problems/challenges the characters facing being just.. poor communication 9/10 times? It becomes so unwatchable as the characters you enjoy stop fighting the big bad evil monsters or whatever, & start to just argue with each other & That's the challenge to overcome. So painful every time
I personally found that a lot of “adult” fiction served a different purpose than why I was reading. I still read as an escape, a chance to go somewhere else in my imagination for a while. Adult fiction often takes itself so seriously, and I’m often not looking for that.
Man, I gotta go get some of those journaling activities from target, tho. They look fun enough I might actually do them.
I feel like this is exactly why I'm so picky about the "adult" fiction I read, and why so much of it is fantasy and specifically "soft" sci-fi (stuff like Star Wars novels). I don't want serious, I want dragons and wizards, and all sorts of hokey things. It's why I find so much of modern young adult fiction sort of difficult to get into, as well; too much of it tries to imitate the serious drama of adult fiction, and it hits wrong...though manga and such are usually pretty agreeable for me. Also easy to read in a single sitting, two at most.
Have you read the Wide-Awake Princess series by E.D. Baker? If you haven’t, I highly recommend it! It is written by the author who wrote The Princess and The Frog, before it was adapted by Disney. She’s also written a few others in the same style that were great (I loved the one about Baba Yaga).
@@Mokiefraggle I totally identify with this. Though I do occasionally get into the "hard" fantasy and hyper focus on it. I loved the series(es?) by David Eddings as a teen. I've recently started rereading it.
@@tamoramuir2089 Mostly, I just find that it's the so-called "hard" sci-fi (the kind wherein the science is portrayed with aggressive accuracy, and things have to be "plausible" and have "verisimilitude" to be considered "good") is what I give a hard miss. Like, I love me some Star Wars, especially old expanded universe/Legends stuff from before the sequel trilogy. I like Star Trek, when people aren't trying to force the technology to make "sense." But when my fiance tried explaining the Ringworld series to me, in particular how the actual concept of the "ring-world" worked and why the fans actually fact-checked the author about how his science didn't work, and "the Ringworld is unstable!", I tuned out hard.
Fantasy doesn't have quite as much of a "hard" equivalent, and even in those cases, it's still much looser and easier to swallow. Some folks try to create a reasonable plausibility for how their fantasy setting exists, or why it has the creatures it does, but most of that is still so fantastical that it's much easier to accept without making me tune out or cringe. Heck, I _love_ a good fantasy breakdown of how the dragons, etc. work in this world versus those in others, especially given how divergent they can be!
This is one of the reasons I read so much romance.
When I'm overwhelmed or anxious by a topic, I've found that sometimes looking at explanations of the topic intended for children help me a lot. Obviously no one likes feeling like they're being talked down to, but when it comes to explanations, I actively encourage people explaining things to me like I'm a child sometimes because it can help me understand so much.
I volunteer in the scouts and I've been told about my email drafts to parents, "they're adults!" Like I guess I spoke too clearly? Lol.
If you ever find yourself searching something on wikipedia and it's a bit complicated, look at the translate options. You can actually translate most wikipedia pages into "simple english" and the goal of that 'translation' is to make it easier to understand. Great idea.
@@cullly That's absolutely amazing oh my lord! I never knew that was a thing, thank you so much!
@@watercolourAlto No problem. It's helped me a ton :)
I’m in my 40s and have ADHD and I just started reading through the Percy Jackson books. They are targeted at middle schoolers but I still think they are great for adults too.
I forgot to mention the Percy and many of his friends also have ADHD.
Riordan wrote them for his sons who have adhd. He probably has adhd himself too. That's my guess anyway. I think Percy's 'cool Latin teacher with real swords at school' is based on himself.
I absolutely love that series! I'll go back and re-read it on occasion. That and the Ranger's Apprentice. Another YA series but it's super great and quick to read.
That book series is great! No shame in reading it as an adult. Same with Harry potter and other fictional works. Stick with a genre you like or many likes and have fun with reading.
The Percy Jackson books are great! I’d recommend them and the Wings of Fire series by Tui T. Sutherland. Both are great books meant for middle graders that can also be interesting for adults.
As a an adhd teen now going into high school that’s still one of my favourite book series.
Re: cookbooks, I really recommend the books by the amazing British anti-poverty campaigner, Jack Monroe. She is AuDHD and has written her books with really clear and accessible language and specific explanations. Her recipes are also pocket-friendly.
Yes!!! Jack Monroe is fabulous! 🥰
Wow those look awesome! Thanks for the tip
It's funny that this would come up now, because lately I've been thinking a lot about how having ADHD feels like having to essentially parent yourself. I do things like...buying weird, different toothpastes to make the idea of brushing my teeth seem more fun. I'm more likely to want to shower if I have fancy new soap, or fun shampoo. I stand a better chance of remembering to drink water if I have a cool new water bottle, etc.
I just need to find ways of hitting that same chord without constantly buying new things.
Oooooo good ideas! Also buying stuff that is consumable helps with clutter, but satisfies an impulse purchase. I’ve landed on fennel toothpaste. One time I was on a trip and my friend forgot their toothpaste and I was like use mine!’ They were not happy! Lol~~
Check out your local ButNothing group! Great way to try new things without buying a thing!
I always felt guilty for this part of me because I thought it was just terrible consumerism, so thank you for this perspective! Right now I'm on a search for a shampoo/conditioner I actually like lol
What if you cycled things out? I'm not sure how often you'd remember to do so but if you don't use the same bottles / soaps / toothpastes every day then surely it'll seem new? Or give you something to look forward to next week lol
I feel you on that one. I do. I like to experiment as well. As prices go up, it can be a fun challenge to find creative ways to optimize the things you have. A friend of mine told me tha tshe and her husband loved to eat rib eye staeks often. But the price went up. So she now buys a chuck roast, sclices the meat thick enough and cooks it as a rib eye steak, then she still has plenty of meat left over for more steaks or a pot roast, etc.
This is one of the genuine moments of seeing representation I didn't know I needed
You shop exactly the way I do! I genuinely think my shopping choices make absolute sense, and I don't really understand when other people occasionally note them as unusual. Like, why wouldn't I want this super rad fidget thing? How do other people shop?
But, in the same breath, watching this video makes me realize that, even though I think my behaviour makes complete logical sense, I've actually never seen someone else behave like me.
Thank you! It's really nice to get to see someone like me 🙂
Many times in my life, when people've been perplexed by my behaviour - small things, like how I sit on a chair - I've first been like.. But, my behaviour makes sense? Besides social pressure, why aren't you behaving like this?
And then I've been wondering - Do they see or know something I don't? Does this look different from the outside than what it feels like from the inside? Would I be weirded out if I saw someone behave like that? And then I realize that I don't actually know what it looks like from the outside, cause I've only experienced me doing it. It's so weird. So then I try to imagine what it'd look like and what I might feel in that situation, and try to understand what it must be like for others to experience from the outside, whilst trying to come up with answers for why no-one else is behaving this way, when it makes so much sense?!
I've spent so much time on that mental assignment
Actually being allowed to experience it from the outside is really refreshing. Then I don't have to imagine anymore.
And my conclusion is that, even from the outside, I think everything you did makes complete sense. I don't think it's weird, and I'm perplexed that I haven't seen others do it.
In general, it's really odd to me that other adults stop doing things that are fun just cause they're adults. Why rob yourself of fun? Interesting to hear that it appears to be a executive function thing
Thank you ❤
That’s a good mental assignment right there! 😃
Thank you for writing this, it really helped sum up something I've been thinking about a lot too. Since it's been brought to my attention that I most likely have ADHD, I keep wondering whether something is a 'normal' thing or an ADHD thing. It's often the latter, but even knowing that my behaviour doesn't seem abnormal. That bit where you said " Besides social pressure, why aren't you behaving like this?" really hit me! Like, how are you not obsessed with 3 different tvs shows and their respective fandoms while also having the same loop playing in your head? and like how do you not go upstairs to get the washing then proceed to forget and do like 5 other things? I legit thought everyone did these things! Thank you for writing it so clearly!
@@FoxInAShoe sometimes I wonder if people do, do those things, they just don't talk about it. I talk to so many people who have "adhd" issues. I'm beginning to think it's more common than not. I think as a society, we are so busy it makes it hard to keep up with our to do list. But it is what it is I guess!
This comment passed the vibe check!!
To me, becoming an adult was about realising that no one ever stops being a child
Thank so much for this! It’s so validating! I used to really enjoy the book “7 habits for highly effective teens” when I was younger but now that I’m much older I felt I need to upgrade to the “7 habits for highly effective people” but it was so hard to get into reading it. I walked by the teen one many times at my local store debating if I should get it again and give it another read but I felt too guilty now that I’m an adult . But after watching this video and making the connection as someone with ADHD I am going to get it now😊 thank you!
Ohh I loved it when I was a kid! Lots of pictures, fun or interesting personal stories and it's much easier to read too.
...Now I have to get it from my parents' house, damn it 😂
ooo i also love that book. your comment makes me wanna read it again 😆
That's a good idea. The original book always seemed too complicated to even get started. And I always check my local library's ebook collection when I want to read a book but I'm not sure about it. That way I feel like I'm not wasting my money. Or I'll download Amazon's Kindle samples.
I've always been super intimidated by that book! I didn't know there was a teen one i'll have to pick it up!
I'm curious... does the same also apply with hobbies? For example, I still use my Legos from time to time. I sometimes feel a little weird, but I also feel like it's a part of me. A lot of people call me immature for a lot of my interests, and I wonder if what kind of reaction from neurotypical people is normal for those with ADHD as well?
im not an expert like her but i don’t think you should stop being happy once you become an adult. if legos make you happy then fuck what anyone thinks! if it doesn’t hurt anyone then enjoy it! i feel like sometimes ppl want adults to be miserable for no reason. good for you for finding things you like!
I do legos at times too! One of the things I phase in and out of.
Lego is totally a thing for adults.
And that is not just a marketing campain called "adults welcome".
Put a box of Lego before any Millennial and sooner or later they will start building and enjoying themselves. I know that out of expirience.
It is fun and creative. And we should celebrate that we kept a childish side. Life is boring enough🤣
@@denycast Right?! To be fair, I also sometimes use Duplo as it fits into some Lego bricks, so I sometimes use it as a foundation material.
I totally feel this I have a child and i love to play with his toys and always loved toys regardless of having him or not so play on 😁
My friend does that exact same thing at each shopping trip we take. She goes around and picks out things throughout the store, and then at the end she sits the cart down and takes out the stuff she doesn't want. I didn't know this was an ADHD thing, and it feels so good to realize that, now. I understand her better without feeling like a burden for asking. Thank you! I also have issues with cooking and your idea of using kids cookbooks is intriguing to me. My mom gave me a few "simple recipe" books long ago and I read them once. It was still too much. I may check that aisle out for both cooking and reading. I so wish I could read for pleasure.
It's also a frugal thing, to limit spending.
I would get reprimanded for taking things out of my cart or basket at the end of the shopping trip. Didn't realize it was a neurodivergent habit.
I do it in the supermarket as i go so i leave a trail of abandoned items around the store 😅
It's just a smart thing to do. Going over the stuff you got when dopamine hit and judging them when you have calmed down helps curb regret spending.
@@justbeegreen who would reprimand you for that?? You aren't even at the check out! seriously, anyone is allowed to change their mind 🙄
My grandma always said there is a difference in being child like and childish and being child like is great!
Also a tip for puzzles get one of those 12x12 scrapbook storage boxes than put the puzzle you are working on box and all in that container now you can build the puzzle inside the box and close it and go back to it even if you don’t finish it. That way you are less likely to lose pieces.
Totally gonna use this tip if I remember when pay day rolls around 😂
You can also get specific puzzle mats to roll up your puzzle on.. You do need to have some of it finished tho, cuz otherwise it will "collapse" when rolling out.. Also the puzzle needs a bit of straightening out and "mending" when rolled out..
I tried the box thing, but its much better if you dont have a lot of room.. 😁🥰
Another tip: use a sieve to get rid of some of all the "dust" that comes along from the cutting at the factory, before you do *anything* else..
As an Autistic ADHD'er, the "dust" really trigger my senses, and its annoying when sorting the pieces.. 🤐
Also, when I was admitted at a psychiatric hospital, I could do my puzzles on the floor in my room.. When the cleaning crew came along, I'd just drag the mat around to clear that specific area of floor for them.. 🤣
This is genius! I love puzzles but i never finish them in one sitting. But i get overwhelmed with trying to find a place where it can live while I’m doing it. Thank you for sharing this tip!
I don't get it. What if the puzzle size is larger than 12x12? I need a diagram LOL.
Thank you for this. I was diagnosed last year and have had a lot of moments where I've felt "behind" as an adult and this helps take some of that shame away. Also I'm still just kind of childlike in general and I don't really think that's a bad thing!!
Me too I always thought I was alone even though my mom has have developed past the hard yrs I still feel it
PLEASE DO THIS AGAIN!!! This made me feel soooo much better about myself. I always feel embarrassed about how I love looking in the kids section for things. Getting diagnosed in my 20s meant that it was at a point where I was so good at masking it kinda hit a breaking point and now I'm trying to relearn executive functioning and coping with the fact that it's an ability lacking in my brain. Thank you so much!!
I'm a baker by profession. My hack for understanding adult recipes is I always re-write recipes I use in shorthand with arrows, parentheses, and a very minimal amount of words. I also make sure that the relevant instructions for each group of ingredients are next to those ingredients so that I don't have to keep looking back and forth between the list and a long paragraph of words at the bottom of the page. It's SO MUCH easier to read while baking. I wonder if my system would work for others with ADHD. I've thought about publishing a recipe book, but also that sounds like a whole process that I don't know how to do.
I LOVE that you made recipes more ADHD friendly and I would be very interested in any cookbook (or blog!) which wrote up recipes this way.
I can't tell you how many times I have gotten part way through a recipe only to realize I forgot to prep something, or that I missed a step because I was trying to switch back and forth between the list of ingredients and the instructions. Ugh. And the incredibly long list of super specific ingredients of which I only ever have like 50 percent! And no suggestions about substitutions! Basically I ended up learning the "outline" for a couple easy recipes and just substituting in whatever I happen to have on hand because no way am I making a special shopping trip just for one recipe
I rewrite any recipe I plan on using. I can't stand that most recipes assume you can remember how much of an ingredient you need without referring to the ingredients list. Or you're supposed to just... Look at the beginning? I lose my place every time!
Much easier to spend the spoons to rewrite a recipe in a format that works for me than to spend spoons trying to comprehend the original recipe.
@@rystong2796 otherwise you need to reread it over 100 times the simpler it is the better makes it more executive functioning friendly to cook
This is also why all of my stuff is either gorgeous and “fancy” or cute (and 50/50 chance of being from the Pokémon Center); if I have to spend my time doing boring adult/bodily maintenance things, by God, I’m going to cram every scrap of dopamine into it possible. Boring stuff isn’t any cheaper, but does add insult to injury of having to spend hours a day writing notes for school or showering myself or my kid or wearing clothes or using my computer. So I use extravagant fountain pens that are beautiful, allow me to keep a constantly-changing variety of designs and inks on hand for visual interest (and color-coding!), and Pokémon-themed stationery and accessories from Japan for school (their paper quality is the best in the world and not even more expensive). I got the cutest, clickiest mechanical keyboard that I threw some craft foam in to make sound more thocky so the whole house can hear the sound of my Productivity because it’s so delightfully obnoxious and satisfying, on a huge antique desk with open and closed storage to keep my most-used items on hand (and VISIBLE so I remember that I own them!), a Master Chief controller stand as my iPad stand, and other decorative but functional stuff to make time at my desk enjoyable and productive. I only buy my sheets from the kids’ section (since I share a Full bed with my 6-year-old and he sure isn’t judging my Pikachu sheets), and my bed (when it’s made) is covered in *my* Pokémon plushes. I don’t wear boring clothes unless I’m way burned out or sick; nearly every day is some kind of themed outfit (Ms. Frizzle was more of a formative role model than I realized) because it brings me and my friends joy (and hopefully gives people more courage to dress in ways that make them happy, too).
All this to say, whatever works and makes you happy is what you should be doing. There is no reason that anyone should try to avoid anything “fun” or “childish” just because they’ve circled the Sun a certain number of times, and anyone who suggest otherwise is still just trying to fit in with a boring world that doesn’t care anyway. If it’s worth doing, it’s worth enjoying!
I Didnt know beauty produce dopamine
You sound authentically you & hella cool for it :)
Omg yes! This is awesome, I totally agree! Also Magic School Bus was my jam as a kid, and I am also obsessed with matching themes and colors! xD
I love Miss Frizzle too and Pokèmon I'm in my early 20's and have adhd.
Ayo let’s be friends because sounds like we’re twins already.
It really is so helpful with ADHD to be our complete authentic selves because live is legitimately harder when we aren’t. Neurotypical people can learn from AT LEAST that.
S🥰🥰
This explains why I like so many things meant for kids and teens. But also sparkles, dinosaurs, unicorns and holographic stuff is awesome and there is no reason the fun and whimsical things should be exclusive to kids and shamed for adults. Growing up and accepting dullness is lame. Play and whimsy and wonder should never be shamed out of people's lives.
I agree, it's sooo stupid... When did being cheerful, playful count as a kid thing exclusive.. I refuse to do that and really do not care what others think about like playing games, act silly, etc... Ppl should understand what really differentiates a kid from an adult... and it's not that we stop caring about our inner child, that would just brings sorrow, bitterness as we can see mostly on the older generation.
Ok but dinosaurs are amazing and I recently rediscovered my childhood obsession with dinosaurs and its so good!!! Spinosaurus is now thought to be semi aquatic!
Im a sucker for anything with a unicorn on it.
I am very lucky to have two best friends who gets me. I'll be at the store with them, see something sparkly or whimsical, and get excited. They just laugh and support me with whatever crazy I'm up to next. I'm a sucker for anything soft, pink, sparkly, or unicorns. (and I'm 33). 😂 I love children's books too. I could be in that aisle forever if I could.
@@cathuff5802 Amazing!! Remind me to revisit the two dinosaur books I have left on my book shelf later🤩🤩
Watching a adult with ADHD a little older than me - only a few years - with the same name as me buy bath toys is just so gratifying. I'm not diagnosed yet, but it's like on a list of 10 things I'm 8 of them. I've always thought bath toys were cool and this just helps confirm that I am absolutely right! Thanks again Jessica!
Get diagnosed ASAP it matters time wise
I’m a retired librarian, a 74 year old with ADHD. I LOVE YA and children’s books! I have an extensive collection of each on my bookshelves. There is so much to be learned from picture books, coming-of-age stories, and books in verse. I share these with my grandkids (some ADHDers in the group) and we laugh, cry, learn, and wonder together. So happy to hear you are encouraging others to enjoy this wonderful world!
I loved seeing "The Island of the Blue Dolphins"! I re-read that book at least once a year when I feel like my mind is getting too cluttered or I'm struggling with emotional regulation. It's a short, fast read for me. Knowing what's going to happen really helps me just relax into the story. It's like a reset button for me.
That's my fav book. I got so excited to see you reading it.
I should read that book again.
Okay, so I listen to children's audio books to go to bed at night because they require limited executive function and the stories are really engaging and easy to follow.
After watching this... I no longer feel shame!
Here's to more children's audio books!
I knew this was gonna be a good video!
Thank you!! 💙🧡💙
Ooh! I love audiobooks. Any recommendations?
Alexa has a good one about an acorn that became a tree. It was very relaxing.
I do as well. No suspense. A reader you love. Priceless. Like having a parent read you a bedtime story. I never had that.
A short one I like (I cycle a few different ones) is Lyn Manuela-Miranda (hope I spelled that right?!) "Goodmorning Goodnight" I think it is called.
I use one called Get Sleepy. It's not made specifically for kids but the stories are simple and the voices soothing.
I listen to the same lullaby soundtracks I did as a child. If it works, it works.
My MFA is in writing for kids and Young Adults and it is a GREAT genre for anyone. It's faster Paced and the characters experience emotions intensely and now that I think about it they're often impulsive too... maybe you're in to something!
I prefer YA fiction because a lot of adult fiction isn’t as fun to me. I’d never go back to high school myself (you couldn’t pay me to go through that again!) but reading some fictional high school drama can be nostalgic sometimes.
Other than like thriller let mystery novels I deff prefer young adult novels. I also have dyslexia.
Love this. I stopped caring years ago but understand that the shame is still there for a lot of people, especially when people have had what being an "adult" means hammered into them. I'm glad I was raised by my mom who is a total nerd and likes things that others might consider "childish."
Live your best life, or create it by playing DnD 😸
I would actually love a series on this. Since living alone I find it so hard to look after myself properly but if I found ways to make it 'fun' like this video I'd probably be better
Yet another amazing video breaking down huge barriers for ADHD people. I absolutely agree, I use a lot of “kids” stuff to help myself regulate and enjoy life. I love stickers and they help me get stuff done, I love dice and toys for fidgeting…the list goes on. Thank you for normalizing this!!!
Re: adult coloring books - I like the idea of coloring books, but my perfectionism tells me I'm going to "mess up" the fancy adult ones. Less complicated coloring books meant for kids might be the solution, thanks for the idea!
You're welcome! Let us know how it goes!
if it helps you get reassured, many of us adhders also have less than normal hand/eye coordination so when i color i usually go over spots ^^" i get some liquid eraser (idk what it's called in english) or use the undo buttons when it's digital!! also obviously digital painting is less hurtful when i go over the lines because i can erase it quickly and easily
@@mus1c3gg Interesting! Digital coloring books are a great idea. Thanks!
@@mus1c3gg I used to go over the lines but now I like to do them. :)
My thought exactly!
This is one of the reasons why I paint my nails bright glittery colours. They're a great visual fidget and I love watching the light sparkle off them, it's soothing and stimulating at the same time. I just have to be careful not to get lost just staring at my nails for half an hour 😅
The thing I do with writing recipes is to:
-Have one instruction per line
-Have each quantity put in the relevant instruction lines (in addition to being in the ingredient list)
-Put things in the actual order of time (so no need to scramble to work out what needs to be done when)
Thank you for making this channel! My husband and my daughter both have pretty intense ADHD and it’s really hard as a wife and mom to not default to “Why can’t you ______!” But I’m determined to make sure my daughter learns about her brain and how to live and have a life she enjoys, and also to be a wife that really helps my husband and supports him the way he needs without feeling like I just have to “make up” for the things he doesn’t do.
THANK YOU!!
Thank you for your perspective and thinking critically about how you relate to the brains in your life. There are things that we have to restructure for the most success, but there's also many awesome things that come to us naturally that people without adhd admire. Best of luck on your journey :)
Such a good concept. Since I've gotten to the age of like 14 even (I'm 22) I've started to be ashamed about liking things made for kids (I've always been more childish as a person, trauma maybe too?). Years and an ADHD diagnosis later, I've started to re-accept my childish side and realize that if I can make things fun, I'll actually want to do them, therefore it makes it worth it to have "childish" things. Slowly I'm stopping the shame more and more and honestly starting to enjoy life more again which is amazing. Crazy how much just treating yourself nicely and getting things to make your barriers less of an issue really really helps your mental health
I love this video! No one ever talks about this and i feel better knowing i shouldn’t feel ashamed for buying stuff from the kids section. Like i know it doesn’t harm anyone and it helps me but having other confirm it helps me feel less ashamed
And shopping videos are also just really fun to watch
1. In my bullet journal I put a little sticker next to the day when I do All the Things. It's so motivating! Not just to do the things, but to not load my day up with an impossible list of tasks.
2. On the Headspace meditation app, I love the Kids exercise on Focus, because instead of focusing on an object in the room or your breath, you focus on a pretty sound that slowly fades to silence. I don't know why the adult focus exercises don't use this, since many people are more auditory than visual.
Totally love how unstigma you make what ever makes your life easier better more Neuro diverse friendly with no guilt
"trying so hard to meet the standards that everyone else is holding us to" crying now, thanks haha. i'm not a people pleaser but with my girlfriend it's what makes me happy, seeing her happy and up until recently I've sort of disregarded myself instead of balancing the two out. your channel gives me an absolute rollercoaster of emotion. i'm being tested soon. thanks so much for helping me catch this at 19 instead of 20 years down the line. :)
I often struggle with shame from feeling immature in relation to some of the close and accomplished people in my life, both friends and family. I sometims wish I had more friends like yourself. You always make me feel so heard.
I took my daughter to the bookstore about a month ago, and I was walking around the kids/young adults section, and man, those books looked so much more fun than anything in the adults section. I’ve been actually collecting old books from series I started but never completed as a kid, like Keys to the Kingdom by Garth Nix and the Pendragon series by DJ Machale, and they are really fun. I’ve read a few adult series and enjoyed them, like Dresden Files, Magic Ex Libris and Monster Hunter International, but overall it’s hard for me to find something interesting in the adult section of fiction literature, so going back to the books I read as a kid has been fun.
LOVE LOVE LOVE Garth Nix books. If you want something still YA but slightly higher level than Keys to the Kingdom, the Abhorsen series is amazing. I almost named my firstborn Sabriel 😆
Oh how are the Keys or the Kingdoms? It is the one with the weekdays, right?
@@MorriAelthyn I’ve heard good things about Sabriel, but I’m not a huge high fantasy fan. For some reason it’s really hard for me to get into high fantasy novels, even if I really like the concepts. The only one I can remember really getting into was the Eli Monpress series. I read through the first three books in an omnibus, but I still need to read the last two.
@@denycast yes. I’ve read up to Wednesday or Thursday if I remember right. I bought the books last year then stopped reading after a bit. I really like them. It sort of reminds me of a more ordered Alice in Wonderland. The different places In the House that the main character goes to are pretty imaginative, but it’s all bogged down in bureaucracy. It’s interesting to see the different worlds and what not.
Keys to the kingdom is a GREAT series! I recommend the audiobooks, Tim Curry narrates some of them.
This came at a great time for me - I've been angsting about my more "childish" habits and tastes, and it did my heart good to see you enjoying and using the tools and games aimed at children and young people.
I remembered just today that I learned all my html skills from a website created by a kid!
I did too!! Then all the CSS I did learn I learned, usually, by asking fellow kids and learning from their codes. And glad the video hit at a good time for you
Hey, can you please recommend to me these html and CSS resources? 😭❤️
@@lv9265 I so wish I could! Unfortunately a lot of what I used to use I've either forgotten or eventually was taken down likely due to someone no longer paying for the domain name. But I definitely recommend looking for HTML/CSS for Kids on google, youtube, or checking out the HTML/CSS for kids books at a bookstore or library! Then using whatever clicks with your brain!
Paint by numbers! Great adult coloring book feel for ADHD. Also helps working memory for me and gets easier
I still feel a bit childish for my age, I still play video games, watch cartoons, browse the web, watch streams, I liked toy cars until I was a teenager.
People have told me that im childish and that I need to grow up at times. I do have meltdowns like a child at times when I get stressed. Im also Neurodivergent too(autism, undiagnosed adhd).
Glad that I'm not alone with this at all, thank you!!!!
The reality check is my favorite feature of online shopping. By putting some distance between myself and the temptations, and having the cart keep a running total for me, I make MUCH better choices and spend less money overall, especially when I put off checking out for a day or two. The main dopamine come from the shopping, not the buying, anyway.
I also find the opposite. Way too easy to move from "oooh, sparkly" to purchase.
Yeah, I much prefer online shopping. I can look at the price of my total shop and ask myself "Is there anything I can buy later/next time?" And in most places they'll let you add a product to a different list. And there's a good chance I'll forget about that list, so I didn't really need the thing to begin with and added it on impulse. :P
Raise your hand if on a weekly basis you fill an online cart and don’t submit it because you forgot or because it’s a strategy to control impulsive shopping! 🤚🏽😄
"The main dopamine comes from the shopping, not the buying, anyway." 😂 Seriously! My friend and I will have a conversation that goes "What'd you do today?" "Oh, just went pretend shopping." "Find anything good?" "Yup, it's hanging out in my cart".
We do it because we're poor, but I never thought of how the fun really is in the finding and picking out, not the actual stuff. I always go back and click "Save for Later" on a bunch of it, only to look at that list later and not even remember why I wanted something, lol.
That reality check has saved me boatloads of overwhelm in how to organize even more stuff than I already have.
@@ArtzyZero this is actually a really cool idea ty, if it's something I genuinely do want then I'll remember to go back & buy it, if not.. delete months/years later when I randomly come across it !
Thank you for this! My desk is covered in fidget toys, but after watching this, I realize that I'd been keeping away from kids' toys just for the reason that I'm an adult and "shouldn't" use them. This video really broke down some barriers for me. :)
I read SO MUCH young adult stuff and used to be ashamed of it, but it was literally the only type of books I could comprehend and stay focused on. I also love slime as a fidget
Love this! I already get stim toys from kids' aisles, but I hadn't thought to look for things like kids' cookbooks, water bottles, toothbrushes, etc. Such a great tip. I have a tip that's more autism/sensory related: if you're averse to mint toothpaste, try kids' toothpaste in another flavor like bubblegum, strawberry, etc. I used to get nauseous every time I brushed my teeth but now I don't!
omg! I hate mint toothpaste! I have never heard of anyone else not liking mint toothpaste and I was reading through these comments and found like 2 or 3 people were talking about how they don't like mint either. I need to know what else we have in common now, so weird! :)
I gagged this morning from this! Thank you for this tip!!!
I like that you mention reading young adult books. It’s very helpful for me and they are less demanding. They also use simpler words and as someone who struggles with reading and comprehension(undiagnosed dyslexia, it makes me feel more motivated. This is SO HELPFUL!
I have a 6 year old boy. Some of the books that we have geared for him (and a bit older) are absolutely beautiful in their simplicity and explanation. Make me want to cry at times, they're so beautifully simple and effective.
The most ADHD-friendly modern fantasy series has to be: The Dresden Files. It's all first person, so you never have to adapt to a new perspective. The sentences are short, clear and informative. I can easily knock out a whole book in a few hours.
God, I read one of them... and maybe it was one of the worse, but I really did not like it... so much exposure, it felt overdone and clumsy. But I really like the RPG to the Dresden Files.
I love Terry Prattchet as an easy engaging read, and reread.
And the Ghostsitter series by Tommy Krappweis really rocks.
oh so the difficulty to read 3rd person multi-pov could be adhd related as well
I just started rereading Storm Front for the nth time last night. It makes fir interesting bed time reading. I find myself looking for details or clues that relate to other books in the series to try to identify where the next book will go. Usually fail, but he has my attention. I picture Dresden as resembling a friend of mine that's about the same height and has a similar fatalistic view of life. I do not plan to tell him this either. The Dresden Files are fun reading. (So is anything by Terry Pratchett or Hillerman, Tony or Anne.)
For the writers who read this: The author, Jim Butcher, had a kickass a how-to-write guide on his Lifejournal page once upon a time. It might be still up. Mr. Butcher's text taught me some writing skills that I haven't found mentioned anywhere else since then. And I've been actively looking!
Totally different fantasy, it's paranormal horror comedy fantasy, but Fred the Vampire Accountant could work for you. The books a separated in 5 parts that each have their own story arc but something overarching to make the books feel like one book. The dry humor and Fred's voice take a bit of getting used to though and if you don't like books that read like diaries you might want to skip it. It's not blatant in the entire books but there are some moments where it's clear that Fred writes the stories in his diary after the fact (which sometimes include stuff like: I wasn't there so the next part is written by such and such character to give a complete view of the situation).
The inclusion of some myths like sasquatch and a bunch of human shifter that aren't wolves (and also dragons) just makes it more fun. I love the world building in the books.
About the Dresden Files: man the male gaze is real in at least the first and second noves and the first couple shorts in between them. That's my biggest drawback, also that I knew who did it in book 1 before the character was introduced on page. Because he's mentioned with suspicion before that. I love detectives though, it's partly a nostalgia thing and paranormal detectives are extra fun to me. They feel like comfort reads because of the nostalgia for detective stories I have and the fact paranormal stuff is relatively easy to understand compared to my fave political fantasies.
If I have the focus and right head space though, I do an audiobook of a complex fantasy on like double speed and a jigsaw puzzle at the same time. But right now I can't really do either. I need simpler stories so I revert to romance instead.
thank you for this!! i'm one of those people whose hyperfixations almost always involve some sort of book/movie/tv show that's supposedly "for kids", and this video helped me remember that that's nothing to be ashamed of ☺️ also, anyone else here who realized that "kid's media" these days can often be just as complex and deep as adult media?
Yes! I was OBSESSED with Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure and could not get enough of it! I was also like, "there are some really dark themes here"
@@courtneydobbertin THAT SHOW IS LITERALLY MY CURRENT HYPERFIXATION
@@sophieti9707 omg it's SOOOOO good!!
This video like some of your others bring tears to my eyes. I just thought I wasn't good or smart enough to do certain things, but now I'm understanding WHY and really just how much I was struggling with so many things. I'm 47, unmedicated, & un-officially ADHD and only found out about my own ADHD because I was in college working for an early childhood education degree 2 years ago. (My husband has it & was medicated & apparently many others knew I was,, but I never saw it in me.) I love reading kids books, coloring, playing with toys, LOVE stuffed animals, throw blankets, textures, & finished my first year teaching 4 yr old preschool....and I love it. The attention span is perfect for me in not needing to go so in depth with lessons. Thank you for your videos. I'm continuing to watch more. Even while watching I have found that I have to remind it, but please know just how much you are helping reassure & teach me in a more positive way about myself. God bless you always.
This made me cry a little bit. The YA books, the bath toys. Then at the end, putting everything in the basket... it looked like my shopping cart. I felt so seen. I have bath toys, a bubble gun, colorful and bright *everything*. This channel has changed my life in the last six months, and this was just like the big emotional cherry on top. I really appreciate normalizing buying children's toys for the ADHD brain.
Awesome video! Apart from lowering demand on executive function, I especially love the idea of "making boring things fun". I think that would benefit everyone, not just people with ADHD. I've only just started even thinking about that, f.ex. listening to music while doing chores, drawing cute doodles on reminders or shopping lists etc. It makes me smile and gives me a break from the tedious everyday boringness :)
The reality check at the end is always what does me in. I've overcompensated for the impulsivity of "I want this and this and this" by being able to talk myself out of buying anything, even if it is something I really should be getting
That... that is very relatable! It can be hard finding that middle ground. Takes practice, I think. And when you do put something away that you needed... figuring out why you put it back and learning from the mistake... as a way to kind of carve out the middle ground. That's what helped me anyway... I hope that maybe it can help you! At the very least know that you're deeeefinitely not alone!
Yes yes yes!!! Sticker charts always helped me and when I told my therapist, she got weirded out and told me that that’s a kid’s thing. I don’t care though as long as it works :3 Besides, I’ve always been more “kiddish” anyway:) Thank you for this video!! It means a lot to see that other ADHDers are the same way❤️✨
Awwwww, I'm glad you didn't let that response discourage you! If it helps then that's all that matters! 😊
I thought that way too. But I am bad at keeping things going. So my alternative is Habit Hunter, a RPG. Its an app. But games are my thing at 50 years old.
What do you use sticker charts to help with?
Ummmm I'm a therapist and I love my sticker charts! I have one for my exercise routine.
@@elanorglf Bad at keeping going? Me too! Always starting a thing and finding it uninteresting after a week or a month. I strove for years to come up with methods of organization I can stick with. Sticker charts are not it! But I do have an excel table with bar chart i’ve been feeding for a while, maybe it’ll click :)
I related to this so much. My favorite genres to read are middle grade and YA. I still have a bunch of plushies, and still love Disney and Pokemon. These things are such a big part of emotional regulation for me. Using things for kids is helpful in a lot of ways, and it was really cool to see this video. ☺️
This video is so helpful. I particularly struggle with Eaton meals or knowing what to eat due to my ADHD and body insecurity, and never thought to look at kids snacks or cookbooks. It’s something that others may not understand, but for me this is a game changer. Thank you for always giving these simple tips that make life for fellow ADHDers easier. Also when it comes to reading- COMIC BOOKS! I used to love to read even YA books but it’s hard for me to focus on those. I find that visuals and shorter amounts of text are best, and so I’m even working on writing my own comic book (my friends have a bet on when it will actually happen, cause you know, getting things done) but yeah I highly recommend comics for anyone who has trouble with books, they can tell fantastic stories and even give you a better understanding of characters you know from the movies etc.
I would also suggest getting the large print editions of books they make for the elderly. I started doing that last summer and I've not looked back
I think that whatever you find that works for you, is adult friendly!
Also, when it comes to emotions, when we were little the resources, tools and understanding of emotions wasn’t as sophisticated as it is now. I’m pro learning from the books you have for emotions!
This is great! I'm a drama and movement therapist and work with lots of kids and teenagers with all sorts of life challenges. A lot of them seem to have complex diagnoses which include ADD/ADHD and we use a lot of the same toys/tools to support them at any age. Even pet toys can be helpful sometimes for sensory stimulation!!
Oooh I should check out the pets section for stim toys! I've been wondering where tf you buy them aside from online. I haven't seen them in supermarkets. Or maybe I couldn't recognise them? Honestly I haven't been to a supermarket for a while.
One thing I’ve gotten from Target to help with my studying/note taking for college are colorful erasable pens. I love how smooth and bright they are but that I can basically use them like a pencil. Love them ✌🏼
I have learned more about understanding, accepting, and living with ADHD in this channel than I did while majoring in psychology and biology, and even now in med school. So I wanted to say thank you with as much gratitude as you can imagine because you have alleviated a great deal of hardship that is often difficult to express.
I’m currently going through my second year of medical school where research is expected if not required, which can be grueling without ADHD. I lucky to be working on a project that I am passionate about, or else I wouldn’t be able to pull my fair share of work within the time limits. Reading through literature has been hard and I often find myself procrastinating and feel ashamed afterwards without realizing the reasons for the procrastination. The part of the video about dry adult books resonated me, while giving me comfort and helping me understand my behavior.
Best of everything to you!
Re-reading books I LOVED as a kid is exactly how I started getting into books again!!
I bought myself the Burst toothbrush and it pauses the vibration when it’s time to brush a different part of your mouth. Then shuts off automatically after two minutes of brushing. Super convenient and useful for me. 😋 I unfortunately had to throw away all of my sons bath toys that squirt water because they developed mold in them.
Okay so I LOVE THIS!! Since becoming an adult, I’ve struggled reading adult appropriate books as much as I would love too. I have felt shame in reading young adult books since I am no longer a young adult even though I was more interested in their storylines and they were easier to read, process and follow along. I really love this!! This gives me motivation to read more again which I have been craving for YEARS!!
Thank you for putting yourself out there to show the struggles of what we struggle with sensory wise and that adults deal with and don't talk about. It's OK to do tasks and activities that are geared for kids, it will make us more productive in the other areas of our lives we struggle with.
Thanks so much for making this video! I don't have ADHD but I am neurodiverse and relate to a lot of this video. We shouldn't have to give up things when we're older just because they're considered for kids. If it helps us and makes us happy, there's nothing wrong with it
I teach a social emotional curriculum in preschool and have used those Little Spot books! They're awesome. Also, teaching 5 year olds how to identify and regulate their emotions has helped me immensely. It's like I'm learning with them!
Yeah they were not teaching this stuff when we were that age!
Oh this explains so much I'm almost 45 years old and i currently have a huge collection of stationary , most of it very "childish" for my Bullet journal. You know with pokemons, pixis, dragons and so on... God to know that this makes some sense . Thank you so much!!
Couple of things.
It goes for kids too! My 10 year old needed permission from himself and me to use things and watch shows for younger kids and he's much better for it. State champion runner, most challenging kid in the school but loves bluey, charlie and Lola, and pepper pig. Big kid shows from 7-730 and preschool shows from 730 to 8. Works wonders for his sleep.
Biggest thing was chewing and sucking. He chewed his shirt to pieces while stressing before school. He eventually stopped but he was then always late or refused to go. I got him chews but he didn't like them. We had a 3 year old with the same name as him for a week (We're a foster family). He saw me bottle feeding him and, due to the name, imagined himself. He asked if he could have a baby bottle too. Has had one every morning and night for two months and he's on time to every day and arrives in a much better mood. School asked if I had increased his meds. Dentist dubious but said it won't harm his teeth. Psychologist cheered as it addresses trauma issues too.
And kids books are much better written then adult books. They can't waste time with pointless filler so have to keep the story running. My mates an adult fantasy author and reads kids novels as he says they are some of the only good books being written.
Absolutely love and appreciate this video! I always get lost in target at the Bullseye section..so many cool fidgets and learning manipulatives. I think becoming an elementary teacher has really helped me embrace my ADHD. I'm so glad I found your channel.. I watched your ted talk a few years ago and it made me more confident with my "gift"!
I’m obsessed with puzzles! My mom works at a place that sells a lot of small company puzzles and she’ll come home and bring me a new one. It’s the only time I can really listen to a podcast without getting bored.
Until pretty recently I was a nanny/nursery teacher/babysitter/etc and it was so fulfilling and taught me so much. Learning about child development, helping kids through big emotions (even if it was about a zipper that "didn't work"), mediating issues between kids, and answering/trying to answer their questions really changed how I thought about a lot of things. I definitely learned the stuff in this video too; kids stuff is great! It's easy to use, super cute, and usually pretty tough. One of my favorite sensory-friendly kids things: non-mint toothpastes!
Non-ADHD related tip: if you (like me) have really small feet, always check and see if you can get the shoes you're looking at from their kid's line. They're often the exact same shoes but cheaper!
I feel as an adult with adhd and asd, I used to read a lot, even if I didn't understand the context. But as I got older, even after I really gotten into reading with I got kindle account, I felt I lost some reading skills as I got older and more aware of my disabilities. But when I got into podcasts and audiobooks, it made reading so much easier. Granted, most adult books, especially old one's, are still hard to get through. So, I still have to find one's that only interest me but also keeps my attention. Like I was once listening to Hyperion and it was.... so boring. Granted, it was a full cast and had great voice acting. But... it felt... so slow. And it was only a few minutes from the start. Sometimes, there's just some that didn't work for me even though I wanted them to.
There is nothing wrong with just reading/listening to what is fun.
And maybe its less that you are more aware of your disability, but that adult live is more taxing on you then childhood was. When you allready used up all your energy and focus for the day, how could anyone expect you to read something?
If you ever should come into the situation that you need a " short version" of whats in a book, because you just can't get through the whole thing, you might find blinkist interesting. I consider to get it for a month or so, to get through some super dry medical books that conrain interesting knowledge but I could never read in full.
Oh dude, the slowness thing is DREADFUL- every audiobook/podcast I listen to is on 1.25-1.5 speed, it definitely helps (but obvi not if the story itself is boring lol)
I discovered how great audio books were for ASD and ADHD Inattentive when I ran out physical space for hard copies of books
Thank you for making this video! I like my apartment to look really "adult", so I don't end up using a lot of things that could really be helpful because they look too "childish". However, this made me realize that there is no shame in using things that are "for kids" if they work for my ADHD brain!
I am crying as I watch your videos as so much is making sense to me. Almost everything you pointed out are the things I find myself fidgeting with in store. Using stickers for organization and reminders has become my life since I discovered it. I need so many organization tools in order to adult.
I love reading kids books. I just ordered a set of books that I read as a preteen. I enjoyed it so much that I ordered the next series. It has occasional pictures and the story is easy to understand. I've also bought adult coloring books for the past two years and it helps me self soothe. Now I know why I love doodling and coloring. Stickers are soooo hard to find lately. I'm glad you found some. I do the "rethink/reevaluate thing" at the end of every shopping trip before I checkout. It takes extra time but it also helps me decide what's worth it, what's needed, and also prevents me from overspending. This feels so freeing to see someone else shop and act like I do.
Thank you for making this video! I am a preschool teacher with ADHD and I have found a lot of the toys meant for the children is calming to me. Thank you for taking the shame away from using things that are meant for children.
Awwwww you're welcome!!! We're allowed to like what we like too... regardless of what some people might say. 🧡
I remember when between somewhere around 5th grade to 6th grade, we stopped having math "workbooks," which had exercises in the book, that you write on in the book, and you turn in the book to your teachers -- to the system where: you are supposed to copy the problem onto a piece of your own ruled paper, and then solve the problem on the paper, with no prompts or structure -- and thinking: "This is objectively terrible! What does this have to do with learning the actual material? Why is this happening? Why are we making this harder, in a way that has nothing to do with the actual material?" And then as I was getting older, I realized, "They are putting more and more impediments to learning in the way, all the way up through grad school."
Not to downplay your frustrations but over here at least it's done to save money. Each department has a budget for the year. Say a classroom holds 30 students. It's cheaper to buy 30 textbooks and have them for years, rather than 30 that only get used once because a student has written the answers on every page. I'm speaking from my knowledge of UK schools so things may be different where you're from. But even in first school this was the case. Even colleges often expect you to buy your own supplies where possible.
Two of my kids have ADHD - 24 and 21yo and I appreciate your videos because I can better understand what they are going thru each day. The sleep thing really gets both of them. thanks!
I am so glad I am not the only one who does this. I used to struggle in certain subjects but childrens books made them so much clearer with pictures, quick concise language, and real world examples. Even the "For Dummies" type books for adults couldn't hold my attention for too long.
I do sudoku puzzles to relax. I also love puzzles, but if they have small pieces I get bored and lose pieces. My favorite puzzle was one that functioned as a coloring page the first time you finished putting it together.
I love kids stuff! I'm always made fun of for the books I read, but they are way more relaxing.
I totally want that emotions book set!
Awwwwwwwww do you mind sharing the titles of those books? No pressure if you don't feel comfortable sharing! 🧡
@@HowtoADHD basically all my books 😅.
But some of my fave books have been the series by Chris Colfer. And Ally Carter. I also still like twilight (partly coz it was the 1st books I actually enjoyed reading), hunger games.
Last week when I was at Target, I went into the arts and crafts aisle because of course I did 😂
I found a book of blank stickers in all kinds of shapes so you can make your own stickers! I couldn’t get anything extra that day but I think I’m gonna grab it when I go tomorrow. I can can make useful stickers and ones just for fun!
I'm a future Social Worker and these books look AMAZING!! I'm definitely going to need some of these for my future office!! Also...pretty sure my sister has ADHD and so I'm starting to learn more about it. Thanks for the great content!
I work at a pediatric office, there have been several times that my fellow neurodivergent coworkers have gone in the toy box to use like a stress ball, or the colored water drippy toy thing. Great for boring phone calls. Stressful days etc
I'm so glad to see a video on this!! I get embarrassed using stuff in public that's so obviously kid-intended for my ADHD/autism. And resting without doing anything is a total nightmare, which people can't seem to understand. I'm gonna check out those kids books on emotions. Also loved how you went through your basket before checking out. Definitely something I need to do more often! 😁
I love this, I am a teenager, yet for some reason I still feel ashamed to use things meant for teenagers, so while it would probably be so helpful for my brain I just make things harder for myself and avoid it..
you do what works for you. If others around you and your inner critic say no - I give you permission. I have grandkids with this kind of issues.
@@jillianguilford5191 thank you very much, I appreciate you:)
I just need to say thank you so much for what you do. I've learned more about myself from just watch a few of your videos than I have my 28 years in this world. I can't stress how much I've come to understand things about myself since watching your videos and just wanted to let you know even if you don't like or comment on this I just hope you see this so you know how much you are appreciated. Again thank you and have a great day.
I was always thinking this, everytime I want to learn something I always look for the kids version as it's easier to understand and translate into the real world for me. If something is too technical and keeps me frustrated and zoned out then I just try the easier version which is for kids
The technical aspects, especially in my job , is why I am so happy to have things like RUclips to explain to visual and tactile learners like myself! I also zone out when things keep me frustrated or are too technical to break down
I really appreciate how the sponsors are at the end of the video instead of in the beginning or middle, it's very ADHD friendly. I always hated other vids that put sponsorships in between and make me lose focus.