Exactly. When something like this happens to a child, there's usually going to be a lot of support for them. But, no one is going to help a grown man except himself. OP cannot take any risks being involved with this family, especially considering that the nephew seems to be a demon child.
He's 7 and actually got molested. In my life I've had it both happen to me and be accused. The kid needs to be sat down and talked to. For everyone who cares so deeply about men's mental health. Consider this child is male and will grow into a man before you speak.
The mom needed to focus getting her son therapy about what happened to him and then therapy about the guilt for the false accusation. Leave the man alone.
Everyone is so quick to tell the man to suck it up and just deal with it. No concern that his life is over as he knows it. He doesn't owe that child or the gf anything. He should fix his life first before worrying about the kid that ruined his. Then send her Give her a cease and disist
Cop should also see about definition of character lawsuit. For what she posted against him after Her smear campaign post official breakup. OP should also take this experience as a cautionary tale to be wary of dating single moms
It's even wilder because after he broke things off with her, she was shit talking about him on social media about how he abandoned her. She ruined his life and crushed him, and somehow he was made as the bad guy, make it make sense 😂. Yeah, no, OOP deserves better. He was failed by almost everyone in his life.
Exactly. It is easier to regain your reputation after being falsely accused of murdering someone. Hell, it’s easier to regain your reputation after actually murdering someone.
as someone who was traumatized from 2 separate false accusations, no. there's enough barriers for actual victims to go through. don't need to add on the threat of legal action. this is a def two wrongs hypothetical.
Classic reddit if this would've happened to a woman there would be an uproar but because it's a man it's meh it doesn't matter it's just a man falsely accused
I am more and more consuming reddit through youtube so I don't have to suffer the brain rot of the comments. This feels like a curated less frustrating version.
I love how people think that a false allegation just magically f-ing disappears after the truth comes out no it doesn't he'll have to walk around on pins and needles for the rest of his life because of her son and some people will always look at him like someone that got away with it
People will never understand until it happens to them. The lack of empathy is telling of a sick society. As well as the abusers of empathy when it even bubbles up.
Story 1: OP is not responsible for the mental health of the kid that gave false accusations. Forgiveness is up to OP and should be solely on his terms. The EX needs to stop bothering OP for reconciliation. Instead she should invest that time and energy to getting help for her son's mental health and help her son heal from the SA incident.
Don't forget that little brat too. "BuT hE's JuSt A kId AnD wAs MoLeStEd!" Doesn't matter, he knew better than to lie, because we ALWAYS punish kids when WE "know" they're lying. Bet the little brat NEVER lies again after that.
S1: I found it noteworthy that the girlfriend never alluded to discussions with her family concerning the 12-year-old and the identity of his abuser. You’d think there would be more anger in that direction, particularly if she hoped to attempt reconciliation. Also suggests that there could be a family cover-up going on.
The commenters telling him to forgive are insane! His life is ruined because of his bs allegations. He needs to get a restraining order against both of them
Story 1 so he lost his job and reputation and the ex and her liying son want dnhin to welcome them back with open arms. Of course they want d that their ATM was leaving. Glad op cut off all contact
I don’t think that’s entirely it, but also I’m mad and I want to follow this for a bit: they’re gonna dump him soon once they’ve completely drained him, seeing as to how they broke the money generation of their ATM
I hate the comments in Story 1. No one will deny that what happened to the kid was disgusting and sad and the mom did the right thing by her child. However he LIED about an innocent man and ruined his life. The damn comments are like “but think about the kid! You need to care about the kid!” The guy is gonna be out on the streets with no job and no home by the looks of it. He has much bigger fish to fry than placating a kid’s feelings. Fuck off!
I can't really blame the mom as it is very hard to imagine a 7 yr old lying about SA. But the deed is done and there should no going back to this. OP should fully jettison these people from his life. OPs highest obligations are to himself; so whatever the kid is going to go through as a result of this situation should be on the mother to fix.
I agree. Mom really had no choice but to contact police. Where’s she’s wrong is to expect OP to brush all his own trauma aside and return to their relationship. That makes her a complete idiot. As you said, it’s now up to the mother to get counseling for her kid. Also, she needs to pursue some kind of legal remedy against the 12-year old.
But he DIDN'T lie about the SA. He lied about who did it. At the very least I, as a mother, would try to ascertain where this happened and ask the kid where I was when this happened, because assuming the kid was telling the truth I would want to know how I could have been so oblivious. The way he folded with the police leads me to believe he would have also folded with his mother's questions.
@@BruinPhD2009actually she did have another choice. Step 1- separate the victim and the accused. Step 2- get the story from each side. Step 3- gather information outside of Step 2. Step 4- contact police with whatever is found and then get the kid into therapy asap.
Reddit got it wrong, and the comments are complete and utter garbage. You don’t have to forgive anyone for telling lies that ruin your life unless you can and (more importantly) want to do so.
Certainly wouldn't have given the kid the time of day after what he did. "but what about his development ??" Well fuck, let it be a defining moment where he finally learns actions have consequences
Story 1: Why are people gaslighting Op? Yea its terrible what happened to the child yes, but the kid lied and said it was OP that did it! Because of said Lie, it ruined his Professional Life. Sue that woman for Defamation Also. Story 2: .. Ok Op, your mom is Disgusting. She's an adult, Its not like she doesn't know what you and your partner will be doing in said ''Wedding suite''. It seems like she just wants to get in the Way..
@@betterlatethannever4529 Oh they understand. They just don't care. If your a bloke you are basically just a pedo in waiting. I've had police called on me for playing with my own kids at the park. Apparently being 6', big and having a beard playing with a 3 year old automatically means I kidnapped the kid and am a pedo.
Story one: interesting that there’s no mention of the Mom going after the nephew. She was very quick to call the cops on her boyfriend, but the little fucker that actually did it? Well, he’s family, so they’ll cover it up, not call the cops,get him the “help” that he needs. But the boyfriend? He needs to forgive and forget and move on, get back with the mom and get back in line.
Would've just sued their asses for defamation, and the fact that she still gaslit him after saying he won't stay around. The audacity to twist the narrative to get a pity party after what he went through. Sick.
S1: those commenters are unhinged! What happened to the nephew and the GF’s son were both horrible, and yes, the kid was a lot in the wrong (I gave him a little credit for being too young and panicking. There are stories where the accusers did it on purpose), but OP’s career is irreparably ruined. That “glowing reference” won’t go too far because word travels, especially today, and it will mutate into, say, this rumor that OP SA’ed the GF’s son and tried to k**l all of them by burning down their house, or something like that. OP’s life is over because of the lie. He should not be the one who forgives. It’s the other side to suck it up and realize they did, inadvertently or otherwise, something so wrong that they deserve no mercy.
Story 1: It's not OP's job to focus on someone else's mental health and put his own on the back burner. What happened to the kid was terrible, but OP is allowed to not want to see someone again, companies drop people so dang fast if they hear about stuff like this, he's allowed to step away and focus on his own mental health.
I don’t really understand the logic of SA victims who open up about their assault only to lie about their assaulter’s identity?? I promise I’m not trying to victim blame, just genuinely curious about the thought process? Is it a fear thing that blinds them to the damage they are causing an innocent person by naming them instead of their actual attacker? Like how is potentially getting an innocent person locked up and their reputation ruined going to prevent them from being SA’d again by their real assaulter? Or preventing their assaulter from attacking other people? I just don’t get it… I hate that SA even happens. No one, regardless of age/gender/sexual orientation deserves to be abused so horrifically… But just because something awful and traumatic happens to you does not and never will give you a free pass to destroy an innocent person.
“I can’t be too sorry, because I wanted to protect my son,” lady, your son should be locked up for false allegations. EDIT: Have compassion for the son. No absolutely not!
Story 1: OP needs to get a lawyer on the case for the ex to nip it in the bud before it gets out of hand again. She's dragging him back into the provenly false lie.
Day 394 of commenting to help secretvoices Fun fact! Your organs move around and the brain fillers out the feeling, which is why most people don't realize 'it' got them
S1: sue the hell our of her for the accusation and for her comments "This can make us stronger" I'm so sick of this crap from women. Whenever they do some horrible crap, it's always "it'll make us stronger" instead of accountability.
These kinds of situations can not be recovered from. The trust is broken, and people's lives are destroyed. Forgiveness means letting go of the right to pay someone back for what they have done. It does not mean reconciliation. Yes, GF wanted to protect her son. But this is a relationship that can not be recovered from. They need to move on and OP may want to consider relocation to start over.
3:50 i feel like people focus too much on the son. Something terrible happens to him instead of telling the thruth,he lied, at this point his feelings doesnt matter anymore. Why do op have to do all this when he's real the victim? If i was op i would sue the mom for everything that she owned her son and the cousins. I would give Everyone something to really be sorry about.
OP in #1 doesn't owe anyone anything! The people guliting him are so, so very wrong. The child's mental well-being isn't his responsibility or problem. Kid needs a therapist and to leave OP alone. Period
All commenter's saying to forgive are delusional the last thing you give is forgiveness for something like this job ruined life ruined fk that first pay his food a rent till he gets a job back and until his name is cleared which while be never so fk your forgiveness yall preach how about yall grab the shit end of the stick he got before preach forgiveness
S1: Sorry, as much as it sucks for them cut all contact and move on. The consequences are the gf and her sons to deal with. You have to focus on rebuilding yourself before you can deal with others if you ever want to.
Exactly. So many of these commenters are putting all of the responsibility on him to console the boy, but who's doing anything for OP? His reputation, his job? The little boy will have a support system from his mother, but the only person who can protect OP is himself.
2nd Story: There is nothing normal about being this insistent on staying in your adult daughter's marital suite, post marriage. Either the mom is just really stupid and doesn't respect boundaries, or she has some weird ass ulterior motive.
S1: OP doesn’t owe anything to anyone. The kid is not his responsibility. He isn’t the father, has no rights to the kid, has no obligation to alleviate anyones guilt. If the kid needs support and trauma resolution it’s the responsibility of his actual parent(s) to actually parent and guide the kid as he grows. OP had his life destroyed and that matters, period. Anyone who acts otherwise does not have any respect or empathy for someone who did absolutely nothing wrong. Being THE victim and being told to just forgive, forget and “man up” is inexcusable.
Why don’t men share their feelings? “The man sharing his feelings on things that ruined his life and people beefing with him even though he was wronged”
1st Story: There are some things that once done can never be undone. I feel sorry for the boy, considering that he was a victim in this situation as well, by a member of his own family and a peer, no less. But at the same time, OP needs to watch his own ass because no one else is going to do it for him. The ex-girlfriend is delusional if she thinks this can "make them stronger."
Rookie move, first thing you do is you get her to publicly state everything was a lie and she believed it. That'll counter any shit talking she could do. Also, use every legal recourse you can to both expunge your record, distance yourself from her (including cease and desist if it's a thing there) and extract everything from those who turned on you, boss, employers etc. That's drastic but only by making a fuss will people pay attention because it's a case of "a man is believed guilty by default"
This is just tragic all around. The false accusation wasn’t out of malice like a lot we’ve heard about; it was a kid who had actually gone through that awful experience, panicked and said the wrong thing. OP is 100% right to leave, though. There’s just no coming back from that.
Why is it that men are still being told to man up for being hurt but have to be understanding if the woman was the one hurt. OP is the victim, the ex needs to be more understanding but she's still the AH for blaming him for breaking up with her, the workplace needs to make an open apology to inform his co workers.
Okay look Do I feel sorry for this kid? Of course I do So many claim to be SAd for attention but this kid actually was, and made a mistake BUT it's gross to act like OP has to let go of his trauma. His reputation's tainted There's no coming back from this. OP has every right to move on There might be bias because again unlike attention seeking menaces this kid went through stuff for real. It's sad, horrid and I hope the kid heals, but OP isn't obligated to just ignore his own problems.
First story: OP, RUN RUN RUN from your "girlfriend" and her son. After everything unspeakable they did to you--now, she's trash talking you because you went NC??!! That entire family is beyond toxic--it's demonic. She's the definition of narcissistic: "I know I judged you falsely, and my son very nearly destroyed your life forever with his life...but HOW DARE you leave me??" RUN. NEVER LOOK BACK. And get a restraining order.
The comments pissed me off, like hes supposed to ignore everything that happened to him because something bad also happened to the little sh*t that ruined his like it sucks whwt happened to him but he could've ruined his life, its up to the kids mom to get him justice but he is completely right to be angry.
Even on 2019 the stories on Reddit were already stupidly fake. I mean seriously??? The guy gets coerced into resigning, defamed by the gf and the most he does is threathen to take legal action to get 2 more months of pay and 2k more in cash? And let’s the gf defame him? Even the dumbest simp in the planet could not get this worse. The fact that he didn’t sue the company to oblivion and did not threathen the gf for defamation (not sure suing her straight would go anywhere since she did in theory apologise, but a cease and desist letter or a legal threat would probably be enough to make her shut up on social media and even do a public apology). Anyways, the cautionary tale stays there. Single mother whose baby daddy is in and out of jail = don’t stick around. It is that simple.
Wow the comments though. An innocent man's life was almost destroyed and people don't give a fcuk about it. He has to suck it up and play happy family. Classic reddit lol
Story 1: So this story is very believable until the end he said multiple times how he loves her and her son then out of nowhere at the end of the story he just said no I'd never loved yall like what 😂 also those Reddit comments are gold another batch of horrible advice to get to somebody Story 2: As soon as they said they part of the alphabet squad I didn't listen to the story
@@frgmented-dreams6140 ogically, if you're not reproducing as a human, you are literally worthless to the population. Then, when it's two people of the same gender together, it adds to the argument. If we talk morally, as a Christian, I find it very disgusting. Also, if you're going to reply, please don't try to pull any passage out of the Bible to prove a point, because every time people do that, I make them look very stupid.
@@frgmented-dreams6140 Logically it makes no sense because you're useless to the population because you're not having kids secondly morally is wrong because I'm a Christian and I find it disgusting Also, if you're going to reply, please don't try to pull any passage out of the Bible to prove a point, because every time people do that, I make them look very stupid.
@@frgmented-dreams6140 Logically it makes no sense because you're useless to the population because you're not having kids secondly morally is wrong because I'm a Christian and I find it nasty Also, if you're going to reply, please don't try to pull any passage out of the Bible to prove a point, because every time people do that, I make them look very stupid.
Those commenter's on story one wouldnt be singing that same tune if it was them who had their life potentially ruined by a false allegation. Also, regardless of the charges being dropped people will still look at him differently. They will still think he's a predator who got away with it somehow. And OP does NOT owe the ex or that kid anything. Kid or not he knew what he was doing and he ruined someone's life who was innocent over the person who actually did it. If he knew to tell someone that something happened he knew to tell the truth of who did it. And ex is making herself look bad with the sh*t talking. Im guessing everyone knows what happened so her shit talking is pretty much "my ex abandoned me and my son who ruined his life by lying and saying my ex abused him.! How dare he not put our feelings over his and his trauma."
1st story: I disagree with a lot of the people in their comments. If a child accused me of sexual assault and it was someone in their family but you told someone it was me and all these boiled into the snowball effect of me being embarrassed that work going to the police station stating that I'm innocent and of course they're going to think that you're guilty because the fact that it's a child saying that somebody touched them. There is no reason for this man to talk to those people anymore I don't care how old this child is. Why do he need to go and apologize to a child that lied on him? And maybe it's because quite a few you up here was touched by family members or something but I disagree with you sucking up to these people to make this child feel better about the lies that he told.
Ridiculous comments . Every freaking time a parent acts like a pig someone tries to use mental issues. Its a mother teying to assert a dominant position in her daughters relationship, shes being a cow and needs reminding how to act
I dont care that it is just a kid, lying about SA isn't okay. He clearly knows what happened to him was horrible and yet he still said it was OP who did it. Nah, kid gets 0 sympathy or compassion. If it were possible, I'd say OP should sue the kid and his mum for damages, loss of earnings, all that, but that isn't possible coz it was a kid who accused him and for some stupid reason people get pissy when you sue people for wrongly accusing you of SA. Btw, you know the cousin is gunna get off scott free right? The second the victim makes a false accusation, chances of the person who actually did it getting punished drop to like 0 because you've literally handed the defense their arguement on a silver platter. So not only does lying screw over the falsely accused, it also keeps a predator on the streets. But I guess not upsetting family is more important then the huh?
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Story 1 the comments are ridiculous. Yes what happened to the kid is tragic but he still ruined an innocent man's life. He owes him nothing.
Exactly. When something like this happens to a child, there's usually going to be a lot of support for them. But, no one is going to help a grown man except himself. OP cannot take any risks being involved with this family, especially considering that the nephew seems to be a demon child.
💯
He's 7 and actually got molested. In my life I've had it both happen to me and be accused. The kid needs to be sat down and talked to. For everyone who cares so deeply about men's mental health. Consider this child is male and will grow into a man before you speak.
You know all the comments are from women. This guys life is ruined, it’s not his kid. He owes kid and his mother a lawsuit!
The mom needed to focus getting her son therapy about what happened to him and then therapy about the guilt for the false accusation. Leave the man alone.
Everyone is so quick to tell the man to suck it up and just deal with it. No concern that his life is over as he knows it.
He doesn't owe that child or the gf anything. He should fix his life first before worrying about the kid that ruined his.
Then send her Give her a cease and disist
💯👍🏿
Cop should also see about definition of character lawsuit.
For what she posted against him after Her smear campaign post official breakup.
OP should also take this experience as a cautionary tale to be wary of dating single moms
It's even wilder because after he broke things off with her, she was shit talking about him on social media about how he abandoned her. She ruined his life and crushed him, and somehow he was made as the bad guy, make it make sense 😂. Yeah, no, OOP deserves better. He was failed by almost everyone in his life.
False SA accusations should be met with massive consequences.
Exactly, and “He’s just a child” is a BS excuse. Where I’m from, age 7 is legally declared “old enough to know right from wrong”.
Exactly. It is easier to regain your reputation after being falsely accused of murdering someone. Hell, it’s easier to regain your reputation after actually murdering someone.
Should have sued the mother; garnished wages to pay his mortgage for a year would be fair.
THIS!!!!!!
as someone who was traumatized from 2 separate false accusations, no. there's enough barriers for actual victims to go through. don't need to add on the threat of legal action. this is a def two wrongs hypothetical.
Ah, the usual suspects on Reddit: "A man's life was ruined due to false accusations? Screw your feelings and trauma!"
Classic reddit if this would've happened to a woman there would be an uproar but because it's a man it's meh it doesn't matter it's just a man falsely accused
That kid will learn that forgiveness is not guaranteed and there are consequences for lying
💯👍🏿
I am more and more consuming reddit through youtube so I don't have to suffer the brain rot of the comments. This feels like a curated less frustrating version.
Ikr
I love how people think that a false allegation just magically f-ing disappears after the truth comes out no it doesn't he'll have to walk around on pins and needles for the rest of his life because of her son and some people will always look at him like someone that got away with it
People will never understand until it happens to them. The lack of empathy is telling of a sick society. As well as the abusers of empathy when it even bubbles up.
Story 1: OP is not responsible for the mental health of the kid that gave false accusations. Forgiveness is up to OP and should be solely on his terms.
The EX needs to stop bothering OP for reconciliation. Instead she should invest that time and energy to getting help for her son's mental health and help her son heal from the SA incident.
Sue her for defamation
Don't forget that little brat too.
"BuT hE's JuSt A kId AnD wAs MoLeStEd!"
Doesn't matter, he knew better than to lie, because we ALWAYS punish kids when WE "know" they're lying. Bet the little brat NEVER lies again after that.
You can't
OP does have a case if her lies after the breakup affect his employment. He needs to at least get a lawyer to write a cease and desist.
@@JoshuaMaupinyou sound extremely stupid and privileged.
S1: I found it noteworthy that the girlfriend never alluded to discussions with her family concerning the 12-year-old and the identity of his abuser. You’d think there would be more anger in that direction, particularly if she hoped to attempt reconciliation. Also suggests that there could be a family cover-up going on.
Story 1 OP owes his ex and the kid nothing. This could have destroyed his life. The comments have no empathy.
They did ruin his life
The commenters telling him to forgive are insane! His life is ruined because of his bs allegations. He needs to get a restraining order against both of them
Story 1 so he lost his job and reputation and the ex and her liying son want dnhin to welcome them back with open arms. Of course they want d that their ATM was leaving. Glad op cut off all contact
I don’t think that’s entirely it, but also I’m mad and I want to follow this for a bit: they’re gonna dump him soon once they’ve completely drained him, seeing as to how they broke the money generation of their ATM
Why does he have to care about the child’s feelings. There is no coming back from this
It’s awful what happened to the kid, but he potentially could’ve ruined OP’s life because he threw him under the bus
I hate the comments in Story 1. No one will deny that what happened to the kid was disgusting and sad and the mom did the right thing by her child. However he LIED about an innocent man and ruined his life. The damn comments are like “but think about the kid! You need to care about the kid!” The guy is gonna be out on the streets with no job and no home by the looks of it. He has much bigger fish to fry than placating a kid’s feelings. Fuck off!
Also not his kid.
“He’S jUsT a ChIlD!” What nonsense. Age 7 is legally declared old enough to know right from wrong, where I’m from.
@@princessmarlena1359And where is that? "Legally declared old enough" sounds weird to say the least, but you seem to be repeating that mantra.
THIS!
Hear! Hear! Not his blood, not his problem!
I can't really blame the mom as it is very hard to imagine a 7 yr old lying about SA. But the deed is done and there should no going back to this. OP should fully jettison these people from his life.
OPs highest obligations are to himself; so whatever the kid is going to go through as a result of this situation should be on the mother to fix.
I agree. Mom really had no choice but to contact police. Where’s she’s wrong is to expect OP to brush all his own trauma aside and return to their relationship. That makes her a complete idiot. As you said, it’s now up to the mother to get counseling for her kid. Also, she needs to pursue some kind of legal remedy against the 12-year old.
But he DIDN'T lie about the SA. He lied about who did it. At the very least I, as a mother, would try to ascertain where this happened and ask the kid where I was when this happened, because assuming the kid was telling the truth I would want to know how I could have been so oblivious.
The way he folded with the police leads me to believe he would have also folded with his mother's questions.
@@BruinPhD2009actually she did have another choice.
Step 1- separate the victim and the accused.
Step 2- get the story from each side.
Step 3- gather information outside of Step 2.
Step 4- contact police with whatever is found and then get the kid into therapy asap.
Reddit got it wrong, and the comments are complete and utter garbage. You don’t have to forgive anyone for telling lies that ruin your life unless you can and (more importantly) want to do so.
Certainly wouldn't have given the kid the time of day after what he did. "but what about his development ??" Well fuck, let it be a defining moment where he finally learns actions have consequences
What is wrong with reddit forcing OP to forgive the kid? He is old enough to learn action has consequences
Reddit is very misandrist.
Exactly. Age 7 is old enough to know right from wrong (by law, where I’m from).
Story 1: Why are people gaslighting Op? Yea its terrible what happened to the child yes, but the kid lied and said it was OP that did it! Because of said Lie, it ruined his Professional Life. Sue that woman for Defamation Also.
Story 2: .. Ok Op, your mom is Disgusting. She's an adult, Its not like she doesn't know what you and your partner will be doing in said ''Wedding suite''. It seems like she just wants to get in the Way..
They gaslight because it’s a guy. They don’t understand how bad false accusations can effect one’s life
@@betterlatethannever4529 Oh they understand. They just don't care. If your a bloke you are basically just a pedo in waiting. I've had police called on me for playing with my own kids at the park. Apparently being 6', big and having a beard playing with a 3 year old automatically means I kidnapped the kid and am a pedo.
The guy doesnt even owe the kid anything....the kid has learned a lesson! DONT LIE
Story one: interesting that there’s no mention of the Mom going after the nephew. She was very quick to call the cops on her boyfriend, but the little fucker that actually did it? Well, he’s family, so they’ll cover it up, not call the cops,get him the “help” that he needs. But the boyfriend? He needs to forgive and forget and move on, get back with the mom and get back in line.
Would've just sued their asses for defamation, and the fact that she still gaslit him after saying he won't stay around. The audacity to twist the narrative to get a pity party after what he went through. Sick.
S1: those commenters are unhinged! What happened to the nephew and the GF’s son were both horrible, and yes, the kid was a lot in the wrong (I gave him a little credit for being too young and panicking. There are stories where the accusers did it on purpose), but OP’s career is irreparably ruined. That “glowing reference” won’t go too far because word travels, especially today, and it will mutate into, say, this rumor that OP SA’ed the GF’s son and tried to k**l all of them by burning down their house, or something like that.
OP’s life is over because of the lie. He should not be the one who forgives. It’s the other side to suck it up and realize they did, inadvertently or otherwise, something so wrong that they deserve no mercy.
Story 1: It's not OP's job to focus on someone else's mental health and put his own on the back burner. What happened to the kid was terrible, but OP is allowed to not want to see someone again, companies drop people so dang fast if they hear about stuff like this, he's allowed to step away and focus on his own mental health.
Its amazing those people are telling him to drop it but he lost his whole life its amazing men and our feelings are thrown to the side
Story 1. Child or not, he doesn’t have to forgive or understand anything. That’s life ruining stuff.
Do what's best for your mental health and ignore everyone who says anything.
I don’t really understand the logic of SA victims who open up about their assault only to lie about their assaulter’s identity?? I promise I’m not trying to victim blame, just genuinely curious about the thought process? Is it a fear thing that blinds them to the damage they are causing an innocent person by naming them instead of their actual attacker? Like how is potentially getting an innocent person locked up and their reputation ruined going to prevent them from being SA’d again by their real assaulter? Or preventing their assaulter from attacking other people?
I just don’t get it… I hate that SA even happens. No one, regardless of age/gender/sexual orientation deserves to be abused so horrifically… But just because something awful and traumatic happens to you does not and never will give you a free pass to destroy an innocent person.
This is a SVU episode. Only thing missing is OP breaking out of jail to confront his accuser
No you don’t they ruined you life for this crap
“I can’t be too sorry, because I wanted to protect my son,” lady, your son should be locked up for false allegations. EDIT: Have compassion for the son. No absolutely not!
Story 1: OP needs to get a lawyer on the case for the ex to nip it in the bud before it gets out of hand again. She's dragging him back into the provenly false lie.
This is really mess up, yes this child panic but this man's life is ruin, and this child can recover but this man will never recover,
Day 394 of commenting to help secretvoices
Fun fact! Your organs move around and the brain fillers out the feeling, which is why most people don't realize 'it' got them
Day 394 of commenting thank you for your support ❤️❤️❤️
Guess ignorance really is bliss!
1st story, OP should sue for defamation, tortious interference with contractual relationships, and a restraining order/injunction.
S1: sue the hell our of her for the accusation and for her comments
"This can make us stronger"
I'm so sick of this crap from women. Whenever they do some horrible crap, it's always "it'll make us stronger" instead of accountability.
lol the way they treat men on Reddit
A lot like they treat women.
These kinds of situations can not be recovered from. The trust is broken, and people's lives are destroyed. Forgiveness means letting go of the right to pay someone back for what they have done. It does not mean reconciliation. Yes, GF wanted to protect her son. But this is a relationship that can not be recovered from. They need to move on and OP may want to consider relocation to start over.
3:50 i feel like people focus too much on the son. Something terrible happens to him instead of telling the thruth,he lied, at this point his feelings doesnt matter anymore. Why do op have to do all this when he's real the victim? If i was op i would sue the mom for everything that she owned her son and the cousins. I would give Everyone something to really be sorry about.
Hell with that kid and her. I would avoid them both. Your life has been turned upside down and damn near ruined.
OP in #1 doesn't owe anyone anything! The people guliting him are so, so very wrong. The child's mental well-being isn't his responsibility or problem. Kid needs a therapist and to leave OP alone. Period
All commenter's saying to forgive are delusional the last thing you give is forgiveness for something like this job ruined life ruined fk that first pay his food a rent till he gets a job back and until his name is cleared which while be never so fk your forgiveness yall preach how about yall grab the shit end of the stick he got before preach forgiveness
Here we go again
S1: Sorry, as much as it sucks for them cut all contact and move on. The consequences are the gf and her sons to deal with. You have to focus on rebuilding yourself before you can deal with others if you ever want to.
Exactly. So many of these commenters are putting all of the responsibility on him to console the boy, but who's doing anything for OP? His reputation, his job? The little boy will have a support system from his mother, but the only person who can protect OP is himself.
2nd Story: There is nothing normal about being this insistent on staying in your adult daughter's marital suite, post marriage. Either the mom is just really stupid and doesn't respect boundaries, or she has some weird ass ulterior motive.
Don't date Single Moms. I hope he learned the lesson here
S1: OP doesn’t owe anything to anyone. The kid is not his responsibility. He isn’t the father, has no rights to the kid, has no obligation to alleviate anyones guilt. If the kid needs support and trauma resolution it’s the responsibility of his actual parent(s) to actually parent and guide the kid as he grows. OP had his life destroyed and that matters, period. Anyone who acts otherwise does not have any respect or empathy for someone who did absolutely nothing wrong. Being THE victim and being told to just forgive, forget and “man up” is inexcusable.
He needs to be held accountable for lying and making a choixe to ruin your life
Why don’t men share their feelings?
“The man sharing his feelings on things that ruined his life and people beefing with him even though he was wronged”
op does not need to forgive this child/his mother
even tho what happened to him was HORRIBLE op needs to put himself first
1st Story: There are some things that once done can never be undone. I feel sorry for the boy, considering that he was a victim in this situation as well, by a member of his own family and a peer, no less. But at the same time, OP needs to watch his own ass because no one else is going to do it for him. The ex-girlfriend is delusional if she thinks this can "make them stronger."
Sue the mother and the son
Why even ask the people on reddit for advice about something like this? You know they're just gonna spout worthless nonsense.
Rookie move, first thing you do is you get her to publicly state everything was a lie and she believed it. That'll counter any shit talking she could do. Also, use every legal recourse you can to both expunge your record, distance yourself from her (including cease and desist if it's a thing there) and extract everything from those who turned on you, boss, employers etc. That's drastic but only by making a fuss will people pay attention because it's a case of "a man is believed guilty by default"
This is just tragic all around.
The false accusation wasn’t out of malice like a lot we’ve heard about; it was a kid who had actually gone through that awful experience, panicked and said the wrong thing.
OP is 100% right to leave, though. There’s just no coming back from that.
Why is it that men are still being told to man up for being hurt but have to be understanding if the woman was the one hurt.
OP is the victim, the ex needs to be more understanding but she's still the AH for blaming him for breaking up with her, the workplace needs to make an open apology to inform his co workers.
Okay look
Do I feel sorry for this kid? Of course I do
So many claim to be SAd for attention but this kid actually was, and made a mistake
BUT it's gross to act like OP has to let go of his trauma. His reputation's tainted
There's no coming back from this. OP has every right to move on
There might be bias because again unlike attention seeking menaces this kid went through stuff for real. It's sad, horrid and I hope the kid heals, but OP isn't obligated to just ignore his own problems.
First story: OP, RUN RUN RUN from your "girlfriend" and her son. After everything unspeakable they did to you--now, she's trash talking you because you went NC??!! That entire family is beyond toxic--it's demonic. She's the definition of narcissistic: "I know I judged you falsely, and my son very nearly destroyed your life forever with his life...but HOW DARE you leave me??" RUN. NEVER LOOK BACK. And get a restraining order.
The comments pissed me off, like hes supposed to ignore everything that happened to him because something bad also happened to the little sh*t that ruined his like it sucks whwt happened to him but he could've ruined his life, its up to the kids mom to get him justice but he is completely right to be angry.
Even on 2019 the stories on Reddit were already stupidly fake. I mean seriously???
The guy gets coerced into resigning, defamed by the gf and the most he does is threathen to take legal action to get 2 more months of pay and 2k more in cash? And let’s the gf defame him? Even the dumbest simp in the planet could not get this worse.
The fact that he didn’t sue the company to oblivion and did not threathen the gf for defamation (not sure suing her straight would go anywhere since she did in theory apologise, but a cease and desist letter or a legal threat would probably be enough to make her shut up on social media and even do a public apology).
Anyways, the cautionary tale stays there. Single mother whose baby daddy is in and out of jail = don’t stick around. It is that simple.
Wow the comments though. An innocent man's life was almost destroyed and people don't give a fcuk about it. He has to suck it up and play happy family. Classic reddit lol
Story 1:
So this story is very believable until the end he said multiple times how he loves her and her son then out of nowhere at the end of the story he just said no I'd never loved yall like what 😂 also those Reddit comments are gold another batch of horrible advice to get to somebody
Story 2:
As soon as they said they part of the alphabet squad I didn't listen to the story
You are one of the worst people on this planet.
Is there something inherently worthless or gross about two women in a relationship. Seems like you think so.
@@frgmented-dreams6140
ogically, if you're not reproducing as a human, you are literally worthless to the population. Then, when it's two people of the same gender together, it adds to the argument.
If we talk morally, as a Christian, I find it very disgusting.
Also, if you're going to reply, please don't try to pull any passage out of the Bible to prove a point, because every time people do that, I make them look very stupid.
@@frgmented-dreams6140
Logically it makes no sense because you're useless to the population because you're not having kids secondly morally is wrong because I'm a Christian and I find it disgusting
Also, if you're going to reply, please don't try to pull any passage out of the Bible to prove a point, because every time people do that, I make them look very stupid.
@@frgmented-dreams6140
Logically it makes no sense because you're useless to the population because you're not having kids secondly morally is wrong because I'm a Christian and I find it nasty
Also, if you're going to reply, please don't try to pull any passage out of the Bible to prove a point, because every time people do that, I make them look very stupid.
Story 2. The mom is a narcissist.
Those commenter's on story one wouldnt be singing that same tune if it was them who had their life potentially ruined by a false allegation. Also, regardless of the charges being dropped people will still look at him differently. They will still think he's a predator who got away with it somehow.
And OP does NOT owe the ex or that kid anything. Kid or not he knew what he was doing and he ruined someone's life who was innocent over the person who actually did it. If he knew to tell someone that something happened he knew to tell the truth of who did it.
And ex is making herself look bad with the sh*t talking. Im guessing everyone knows what happened so her shit talking is pretty much "my ex abandoned me and my son who ruined his life by lying and saying my ex abused him.! How dare he not put our feelings over his and his trauma."
I will always
Op dumb kisses and hugged his ex
Reddit being misandrist as usual
“You will never find a more wretched hive of villainy and scum!”
Wow Reddit being Reddit with those comments only caring about the child being the victim while ignoring the other
1st story: I disagree with a lot of the people in their comments.
If a child accused me of sexual assault and it was someone in their family but you told someone it was me and all these boiled into the snowball effect of me being embarrassed that work going to the police station stating that I'm innocent and of course they're going to think that you're guilty because the fact that it's a child saying that somebody touched them.
There is no reason for this man to talk to those people anymore I don't care how old this child is. Why do he need to go and apologize to a child that lied on him?
And maybe it's because quite a few you up here was touched by family members or something but I disagree with you sucking up to these people to make this child feel better about the lies that he told.
Ridiculous comments . Every freaking time a parent acts like a pig someone tries to use mental issues. Its a mother teying to assert a dominant position in her daughters relationship, shes being a cow and needs reminding how to act
Reddit victim blaming
I dont care that it is just a kid, lying about SA isn't okay. He clearly knows what happened to him was horrible and yet he still said it was OP who did it. Nah, kid gets 0 sympathy or compassion. If it were possible, I'd say OP should sue the kid and his mum for damages, loss of earnings, all that, but that isn't possible coz it was a kid who accused him and for some stupid reason people get pissy when you sue people for wrongly accusing you of SA.
Btw, you know the cousin is gunna get off scott free right? The second the victim makes a false accusation, chances of the person who actually did it getting punished drop to like 0 because you've literally handed the defense their arguement on a silver platter. So not only does lying screw over the falsely accused, it also keeps a predator on the streets. But I guess not upsetting family is more important then the huh?
Day 176 of telling secretvoices to have a good day
Day 176 of telling you to have a great day
Story 1: you can tell which comments were written by women. No regard to the man whatsoever. Men always comes last.
We need a society when womens words are not believe and regarded as lies, you never hear a man do this
In this particular situation, the accuser wasn't a woman.
Never the are faking idiot and egoistic never regift and Thes stupid people raid to you you don't need to