Absurdities Restaurant Review 2022

Absurdities Restaurant Review 2022
Absurdities Restaurant offers quirky themed rooms restaurant with food to match. You book Absurdities with no menu and no address. All you have is some potential word of mouth and some pictures you can find on their website and social media. Friends of ours had posted some snaps on Facebook, so I thought time for the wife and me to go and have some date-night fun. AKA, the kids are not permitted.
Absurdities price was $368 for 2 pax + $5 booking fee + $26 GST and another $100 on top of that for accompanying cocktails! That’s $499, are you surprised?
The concept is not fine-dining, but fun-dining. I’ll give them that much. Absurdities location is kept secret, until 24 hours before your dining date and time. You get an SMS with an address and photo of where you need to report to. It was outside some random coffee shop. The Wife and I sat waiting, giggling a little with the excitement and wonder of what was coming.
You must book in 2’s of 4’s only. They only have 8 pax per sitting, but they have 2-3 sittings a night. As you exit one room, another sitting is not far behind you. It’s a slick operation. Everyone is has a number on arrival and when you enter a room you informed. “Number 1 and 2 sit here please”. Where you end up sitting depends on the menu and whether you have acquired the cocktails package.
1st you start in a random coffee shop for course #1. Then select one of 5 doors to your second room and second course, which is through a hall of mirrors. You enter room two into a setting from Avatar the movie with a tree trunk as a table, and a hostess dressed in a zebra suit.
You then exit that into a Bedouin tent (well Moroccan) with your second host. You then climb and crawl, exiting a tunnel through a kitchen cabinet into a 50’s pastel American kitchen. You exit under the kitchen table into a Harry Potter-style wand store in the film. Your final room is to board Absurdities Airlines, styled to 70’s garish Austin Powers. Once that is complete you exit a door, and hey presto you’re on the street.
Let’s hear what Absurdities have to say about themselves;
“Absurdities is an Omakase which means you trust us, our chef, the kitchen team. The team at Absurdities are there to serve you a kick-ass delicious 6 course anti-fine dining, fun-dining dinner. Wacky food, quirky realities, welcome to Absurdities. The most absurd restaurant in the world.”
To the food at Absurdities. Omakase can also be an excuse to change the menu. Hey, it was Chef’s choice right, it’s Omakase.The cocktails were excellent, well done to the bar person.
Dish #1 was a vegetable soup. Pretty bland I must say, but the plating was cool. They had fruit balls in a bowl, with some bread and a green topping. Then the server comes over with a kettle and pours the soup.
Dish #2 in Avatar-land was vegan. A pulled-Jackfruit burger, with charcoaled semolina chips. Quite a few people left this dish. I ate it. Not bad, but please no more veggie stuff, one is a carnivore.
Dish #3 came with an apology. “Sorry, this should have been Moroccan-style Quail…” ooooh awesome I thought. But why sorry and supposed? “But we haven’t got any, so it exchanged for Codfish…” Are you are kidding me? “Ah but #2 for you because you don’t like fish, we have replaced it with Falafel.”
Are you kidding me? Vegetarian dish number three in as many rooms. And the Falafel was as dry as the mock-dessert setting we were in.
Dish #4 was the only dish that had any merit to me. That was in the 50’s American pastel kitchen. A deconstructed chicken pot pie, covered in some cornflakes with a cauliflower puree. Top marks for that. Very flavourful and seasoned so very well. I liked the plating, and the cauliflower puree was kicker. I liked it so much though because it was the FIRST chance I had all night to eat some meat.
The biggest joke was with whatever the dish was in the Harry Potter room. Dish #5. Described as squid risotto. I don’t like squid and was yet again force-fed on some bland inedible vegetable substitute.
Even wifey could not even tell what her dish was, and that was the original squid risotto. As in, there seemed to be no squid or rice and enough of whatever it was to only sustain a small shrew.
Then we enter room #6, rather the fuselage of the Austin Powers’ plane. Dessert was something like 4Kg of jelly. Add to this some crushed biscuit, a chocolate dial and some gold flake to bejazzle it. I couldn't consume this all.
Absurdities you need to up the ante with your choices. If someone doesn’t eat fish it does not mean they are vegan.
"Kick-ass and flavourful, texturally exciting, absurdly delicious" is a NO. Absurd is a YES.
For dinner at Absurdities, that is our first and last. Absurdities Restaurant is fun but the food needs to up the ante to match their fixed pricing. $500 is up there with top chef dining, the food did not match by a mile.
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