The Weirdest Time Travel Conspiracy Theories

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  • Опубликовано: 24 янв 2025

Комментарии • 742

  • @brainblaze6526
    @brainblaze6526  Год назад +23

    Thank you Squarespace for sponsoring this video. Check out Squarespace: squarespace.com/blaze for 10% off on your first purchase.

    • @jonathanmimnagh8956
      @jonathanmimnagh8956 Год назад +4

      Fluid engine, go that Whistle zboy.

    • @justinanderson267
      @justinanderson267 Год назад

      Good to see the Spiffing Brit make an appearance

    • @JamesyBoy24
      @JamesyBoy24 Год назад

      @brainblaze6526 whats happening with your Biographics channel?

    • @markjones1337
      @markjones1337 Год назад

      As much as I want to watch this video, I only lasted about 8 mins, due to your totally fake posh uni voice, no one talks like that, it's not your real accent.

    • @somaraisan
      @somaraisan Год назад +1

      I know why Simon is bald. Squarespace. It's glitchy and laggy. It doesn't always save. It freezes up. I am literally pulling my hair out. I'm not blaming you, Simon, but it's slightly deceptive to omit all the screaming and pounding you did while building MULTIPLE websites with fluuuid engine.

  • @mikeharman4257
    @mikeharman4257 Год назад +118

    Simon, you are not paranoid, people from the future are literally watching you.

    • @nickabel8279
      @nickabel8279 Год назад +3

      We are not

    • @frankm.2850
      @frankm.2850 Год назад +5

      The recording, yes. But he specifies he's talking about people literally watching him as he's making the recording.

    • @eph2vv89only1way
      @eph2vv89only1way Год назад +1

      Yup. I am from the future of the day this was recorded and am watching him by watching the video.

    • @eph2vv89only1way
      @eph2vv89only1way Год назад

      ​@@nickabel8279rotfl

    • @notsoberoveranalyzer8264
      @notsoberoveranalyzer8264 Год назад

      @@frankm.2850Well, to be fair there’s a genuine chance that he is being monitored. Because plenty of people are.
      Not even for some nefarious purposes as much as just accumulating information, and improving spy tech and for the hell of it.

  • @samuel_avila
    @samuel_avila Год назад +400

    New theory: Simon is the prisoner, Danny the mastermind and I am the host of ETA’s soul.

    • @DannySalter
      @DannySalter Год назад +81

      Ssssh! We're not supposed to talk about that in public.

    • @samuel_avila
      @samuel_avila Год назад

      @@DannySalter go play with your Commodore before I get real *ETA noises*

    • @1st2nd2
      @1st2nd2 Год назад +35

      I miss ETA

    • @ZAR533
      @ZAR533 Год назад +4

      ❤❤❤❤

    • @LeNeovein
      @LeNeovein Год назад +21

      May ETA return this winter like an un-"Frosty Returns"

  • @wayneknox4510
    @wayneknox4510 Год назад +208

    Theory: Simon is a time traveler. How else does he have time to host like a thousand different RUclips channels?

    • @Daddyoh94
      @Daddyoh94 Год назад +14

      He has a time-turner to do all the videos like classes at hogwarts

    • @a-goblin
      @a-goblin Год назад +21

      he uses the power of _cocaine_

    • @brianlhughes
      @brianlhughes Год назад +7

      he is three guys that all look the same, it happens all the time

    • @ThatSockmonkey
      @ThatSockmonkey Год назад

      Cocaine. He does a lot of cocaine.

    • @PoisonSnowApple
      @PoisonSnowApple Год назад +6

      I bet he stole Bernard’s Watch
      Edit: I’ve just realised this is probably a very niche British reference

  • @soggybiscotti8425
    @soggybiscotti8425 Год назад +63

    I know for a fact I have a doppelganger in another state. The only difference is that I broke my nose as a kid so it's got that flat bridge.
    He worked for the same company I did and was in a branch photo that I saw on the company website. I even called the guy and explained, and sent him our branch photo and everyone working at either branch was blown away by the near exact face we had.
    Never got to meet him unfortunately, as Australia is a bloody large place. But had we met, I like to think the time-space continuum would have torn apart or something.

    • @pettycrockerx9855
      @pettycrockerx9855 Год назад +9

      I’m a Sydney gal and I have a doppelgänger who lives in the area I grew up! Apparently we both even have distinctive scars on our foreheads, and we both dyed our hair purple at the same time when I was a teen. I’ve been stopped by the local police who were mindblown when my ID proved I wasn’t the girl they were looking for because we look so similar, but we’re about five years apart in age also. I want to see her soooo badly

    • @Legendary_Detective-Wobbuffet
      @Legendary_Detective-Wobbuffet Год назад

      I had a lower classmate in japan who was this Swedish kid who looked exactly like me. I annoyed women less though, so i won.

    • @wolfkitteh
      @wolfkitteh Год назад

      Was living in Blacktown when I received a call [on my landline] from a friend in the Sydney CBD who told me he was watching me walk down the street near where he was walking. Same distinctive style of clothing, backpack, hair style/colour but he knew it wasn't me because he was talking to me at my home over more than an hour's travel away. I figure it was either the female model that another friend of mine swore was me who was pictured in the juice ad at his gym [def not me] or was ex-boyfriend's wife who deliberately copied my style - right down to make-up colours - before they got married. The other girls where we worked were so amused [at her expense] by this deliberate copying of me after she started dating my ex.

    • @Legendary_Detective-Wobbuffet
      @Legendary_Detective-Wobbuffet Год назад

      @@wolfkitteh you got Single White Femaled!?

    • @coleslawson9333
      @coleslawson9333 Год назад

      ​@wolfkitteh So your boyfriend started dating a girl who works at the same place as you, and she copied your style after you two started dating? Damn.

  • @PatriceRacine
    @PatriceRacine Год назад +51

    For Chapter 3, Simon should have worn his "Generic RUclipsr" t-shirt. I mean, it's not hard to believe that 2 people can look the same. Simon looks exactly like the host of MegaProjects and Geographics

    • @MissSimsalot
      @MissSimsalot Год назад +11

      Yep, he also really looks like the guy from biographics, casual criminalist and decoding the unknown. Man that guy has a lot of doppelgangers.

    • @ForestFire369
      @ForestFire369 Год назад +8

      I thought he looks just like the guy from Top Tenz

    • @SuzysRedStripes
      @SuzysRedStripes Год назад +4

      And the less we say about his similarity to the Sideprojects host, the better.

    • @willmfrank
      @willmfrank Год назад +1

      Not only do they look exactly alike, but they all have the same name...
      ...I mean...What are the odds?! 😉😁

    • @SuzysRedStripes
      @SuzysRedStripes Год назад +1

      @@willmfrank It's a conspiracy, I tell you!

  • @TheKalaxis
    @TheKalaxis Год назад +26

    My theory is that version of Simon is recording these videos from a future in which clones exist and is sending them back to the pre-cloning OG Simon to put on RUclips in some bizarre attempt to change that future in some way. The clones are how he managed to make so many each week.

  • @davidgreen3423
    @davidgreen3423 Год назад +12

    Simon speedrunning recording this video, I had to check and make sure I wasn't watching on 1.5x with how fast he was talking

    • @digigalbytes2445
      @digigalbytes2445 Год назад +3

      Yes, I've noticed Simon's speech has been reaching almost nonsensical speeds lately... I blame Danny's introductions for this phenomena.

    • @kayti6551
      @kayti6551 11 месяцев назад

      Okay it’s not just me! I’ve been having bad migraines and dead ass wasn’t sure if I was having an episode or if he just talks ridiculously fast at times😂

  • @a.wandering.hobbit42
    @a.wandering.hobbit42 Год назад +47

    I walked into a shop the other day and the cashier said I looked exactly like her wife and she actually thought it was her back early from her trip but then noticed the two teenagers with me (my kids) and then heard me speak ( I don’t sound like her) that she realized it wasn’t her wife. She said it was just amazing how much we looked alike and she shown me a picture and it was weird to look at a picture that looked like me but wasn’t.

    • @AltonV
      @AltonV Год назад +3

      Not long ago we looked at my grandparents wedding photos and in those he looked identical to my brother

    • @fabrisseterbrugghe8567
      @fabrisseterbrugghe8567 Год назад +6

      My great aunt died at 19 in the Spanish Flu. When I was 19, I was handled a photograph of her that was like looking in a mirror.

    • @BronzeDragon133
      @BronzeDragon133 Год назад

      One friend of mine resembles me so much it's a little scary; we even finish each others' sentences. The major difference between us is that I'm five foot seven and he's five foot four.
      My husband has expressed considerable frustration and internal confusion when confronted by the two of us together.

    • @kg-Whatthehelliseventhat
      @kg-Whatthehelliseventhat 11 дней назад

      She was hitting on you. Duh

  • @igitaq
    @igitaq Год назад +7

    There is one thing about time travel that most people don't consider is that travelling through time would not only involve figuring out how to travel through time itself but also how to calculate how much space has changed during that time. The earth is not only revolving around the sun but the solar system is rotating around the center of the galaxy. The galaxy itself is moving away from the center of the observable universe. It is easy enough to track your location relative to the surface of the earth but if you try to calculate your position in a constantly moving and expanding universe things are exponentially more difficult.

    • @SoManyRandomRamblings
      @SoManyRandomRamblings Год назад +1

      Yeah you go back or forward and so many bad places you could end up.... floating in space is bad....but what if you materialize inside a planet, asteroid, comet, star.

  • @DannySalter
    @DannySalter Год назад +53

    Apologies for cocking up Elon Musk’s age, no idea what happened there.
    It’s a bit annoying because it means that my perfectly credible theory of Elon Musk being the reincarnation of Canadian WW1 fighter Raymond Collishaw now makes no sense at all.

    • @samuel_avila
      @samuel_avila Год назад +13

      I blame the mushrooms.

    • @DannySalter
      @DannySalter Год назад +16

      @@samuel_avila By the time I get back from taking my pet lobster for a morning walk, most of the good mushrooms have already gone. Funny, that.

    • @callumfitzgerald7241
      @callumfitzgerald7241 Год назад +3

      Could also be to do with the hallucinations as a consequence of using too much beard blaze oil on your morning breakfast

    • @MCTicTac
      @MCTicTac Год назад +6

      That pilot looks nothing like Musk...

    • @brolohalflemming7042
      @brolohalflemming7042 Год назад

      @@MCTicTac That's because Musk was aware of the existence of cameras in that time period and the probability that a WW1 ace would get photographed. The image will be verifiable once Musk completes his plastic surgery, which is also evidence that he has successfully completed his time machine. Musk will be able to then claim he really did invent electric cars and pneumatic transportation.
      (Oh, and lottery tickets being a trap. This is true and how they caught me. I knew I shouldn't have won 3 weeks in a row, but I was just too greedy and impatient. Plus as Simon frequently points out, the past really is the worst.)

  • @josephxp96
    @josephxp96 Год назад +6

    “No one is coming back to watch me take a shit”. What if you die while on the toilet and they are looking back for comedic purposes?

  • @ignitionfrn2223
    @ignitionfrn2223 Год назад +41

    2:30 - Mid roll ads
    4:40 - Back to the video
    5:15 - Chapter 1 - Fatal time jump
    7:55 - Chapter 2 - Secrets of the tomb
    11:30 - Chapter 3 - Caugh on film
    16:40 - Chapter 4 - Trading futures

  • @jerrywood4508
    @jerrywood4508 Год назад +79

    The story about the insider trader falls apart when you ask yourself why he would be locked up when he's just suspected of white collar crime, and why he would be locked up in a NYC prison instead of a federal prison. But it's good to know the British tabloids were all over this story.

    • @ashwilliams4959
      @ashwilliams4959 Год назад +1

      If you were successful in insider trading, you'd be made president or something

    • @lesliekilgore648
      @lesliekilgore648 Год назад

      depends on who arrested him on site at the time. if NYPD got ahold of him, he would be held in NYC facilities for a period of time till the FBI got ahold of him. if the FBI nabbed him, they have holding facilities at their HQ in NYC. the FCC does NOT have a law enforcement division! and does NOT have arrest powers! the 'talking head' from the FCC blurb would be entirely in-correct.
      without an arraignment or grand jury being called nor an arrest warrant being filed, neither the Feds nor the NYPD would want to hold him beyond 24 hours. so, why was he accosted, arrested, a mug shot taken (shown in the news article) probably fingerprinted and so forth? as well as interrogated and interviewed with the FACTS of his statement to somebody in law enforcement or some other statement being released to some form of recorder or witness?
      THEN Simon states the trader was BAILED OUT! this means the man had MULTIPLE appearances in court. he had been officially charged with a crime by some jurisdiction inside the USA. a grand jury put out an indictment on him and if the prosecutor for that case did NOT call the trader in for questioning before said grand jury... the barrister in question was an idiot. the trader was officially jailed and presented with the full list of charges. then the trader while incarcerated had a bail hearing. where his flight risk was assessed, his passport and other required documents would be presented, his crime would be announced, his plea of guilty not or other would be entered, and the amount for his release upon his own recognizance or into the custody of a bail bondsman or remanded back to incarceration if he could not produce enough funds.
      now according to procedures and laws and suchforth any person or persons or entity can be indicted by a grand jury and need not be present for said hearings.
      also, an arrest warrant can be signed by any seated judge in that jurisdiction for that jurisdiction's crimes. depending on the circuit that judge sits in be it civil or criminal law. so maybe the FBI and/or NYPD got that warrant and served it on that trader and officially arrested him right then and there. they incarcerated him until such time as the grand jury met and fully indicted him for said crimes.
      because without that indictment and official reading of charges during the bail hearing the guy is supposed to be released entirely and utterly within 3 days after being officially arrested and incarcerated. as long as he files a writ of habeas corpus which entirely and utterly DERAILS the police and prosecutors' jobs and puts everything before a judge. one who decides yes or no. the guy goes 100% free for now, or the guy stays in jail because the case is compelling enough that prima facia (on the face of it) it is a legitimate criminal investigation and not some elaborate fishing expedition by the police and prosecutors' offices.
      since the guy got bailed out and VANISHED 100% 'somebody' was out that bail money, and his personal information was held onto and his 'existence' pre 2003 was called into question and suchforth.

    • @KS-PNW
      @KS-PNW 8 месяцев назад

      ​@@lesliekilgore648the FCC wouldn't have anything to do with this. The Securities and Exchange Commission regulates securities trading. The Federal Communications Commission regulates radio/TV/Internet.

  • @ZazuYen
    @ZazuYen Год назад +1

    Man, the Weekly World News was great back in the day. A tabloid that originally competed with The Enquirer but slowly evolved into a precursor to the Onion. My dad was an editor for The Washington Post for decades and knew a journalist who went to work for the WWN, she compared it to going from a war room at her old paper to a nerf battle with adult kids. She was told the only fact checking they expected was, "Is it a fact that this article could get us sued?" She also said it was the best job she'd ever had but the pay was crap :D

  • @RDSwords
    @RDSwords Год назад +3

    I might not ever stop laughing after that "who was she talking to" cutaway hahaha

  • @Darkflowerchyld718
    @Darkflowerchyld718 Год назад +27

    When I was a kid I would use my allowance money to buy The Weekly World News. It was fricking amazing. I knew it was all nonsense but the stories were always so fantastical it was better than any book I could get my hands on at the time. The world before the internet truly was a different world. #BatBoyStan4Life

    • @dilldowschwagginz2674
      @dilldowschwagginz2674 Год назад +3

      The world before the internet was better in many ways. I'll admit that I spend way too many non-working hours watching RUclips and reading articles but social media has triggered a rapid decay in civilization and it will eventually result in the collapse of western economies. These kids think all the luxuries (air conditioning, heat in the winter, microwaves, cars, comfy beds, toothpaste, etc, etc) have magically always been and always will be. They have no idea how hard life will get when the sh*t finally hits the fan. We'll be suddenly back in "survival of the fittest and smartest" times.

    • @LoPhatKao
      @LoPhatKao Год назад

      there's an archive of TWWN you can read online, think its through google books
      found it during c19 shutdown

    • @irighterotica
      @irighterotica Год назад +4

      You too? Remember the saga of Bat Boy? Wild stuff, which was the point I guess.

    • @joshjones6072
      @joshjones6072 Год назад +3

      I loved the Weekly World News too. Some of my favorites! Giant salmon caught on with ship anchor and a goat for bait in China, mysterious old west town discovered on Moon, two weeks later...old west town found on Moon has mysteriously disappeared. 🤣🤣 Oh yeah, tiny rooster the size of a bee found in China. Hahaha

    • @elizabethsullivan7176
      @elizabethsullivan7176 Год назад +2

      the writers of the Weekly World News even say on their website that it's a satire paper not to be taken literally. I've always been a big fan of satire.

  • @dsxa918
    @dsxa918 Год назад +5

    I'm watching this at least 8 hours after Simon and Danny produced this, easily week's after it was written on a script! Excellent

  • @donatodiniccolodibettobardi842
    @donatodiniccolodibettobardi842 Год назад +7

    Also, sometimes people look earily like other people, but only under the right conditions: right angle, lighting, hairdo, expression, age.
    Just a little bit to the side and you'd see they're nothing alike.
    Plus, we humans are not that different looking, we're just incredibly well trained to differentiate faces and that skill can be spoofed.

  • @Stormy_Fairweather
    @Stormy_Fairweather Год назад +15

    i speculated 'time cameras' would be possible some 20 years ago. on the one hand, it would be AMAZING to have them. so many questions about history and prehistory could be definitively answered, which is a wet dream for anyone with a sense of curiosity. but on the other hand... every single one of us has done shit in private we would be absolutely humiliated, or worse, to have go public.

    • @QBCPerdition
      @QBCPerdition Год назад +5

      Time cameras have been used in fiction a number of times. Oddly, there is some scientific basis for this.
      When we look out into space, we see stars, but since those stars are hundreds, to thousands, to millions or more light years away, we are seeing those stars as they were hundreds or thousands or millions or more years ago. If we had a mirror, or some other way to reflect light back, maybe an intense gravitational source, we could see our reflection from the year that is in thr past equal to double the number light years away the reflector is.
      However, that light would not be of inside anyone's home, it would be akin to a very high altitude satellite shot, assuming we could even resolve the image at all.
      Maybe with some impressive telescopes and some conveniently placed reflector, though, we could see dinosaurs or the troop movements of ancient Greece, or something.

    • @soggybiscotti8425
      @soggybiscotti8425 Год назад +2

      Can't remember what it's called, but there was some bishop or something that invented some alleged mirror or camera device that was supposedly used to look back in time at the death of jesus and whatnot.
      It's nonsense, but a cool concept. I'm sure there are videos on it out there. I think The Why Files did one on it. Should ha e a look.

    • @QBCPerdition
      @QBCPerdition Год назад

      @@soggybiscotti8425 I never said anything about light from the future. I was always only talking about seeing the past, hence the comment about dinosaurs or ancient Greek troop movements. I think you misunderstood my comment.

    • @magnemoe1
      @magnemoe1 Год назад +1

      This, yes it would be cool to see live how they build the pyramids and stuff but the real use would be to look back a day to an crime scene or simply that somebody was up to simply to dig up dirt on them.

    • @CoPoint
      @CoPoint Год назад +1

      There's a classic science fiction story about pretty much that - I just can't, for the life of me, remember the name or author: in the story, you can see everything, everywhere you want, but it has a max 'time range' of about 120 years, after that, the picture is just drowning in the noise (so, no watching, for example, the Crucifixion of Jesus...), and it is heavily controlled by the government - only scientists that can prove a very good reason in their application get a limited time of use granted, at the one existing, enormous device, as the waiting list is endless.
      One scientist, after again and again only getting denied, gets the idea of just building his own version of the device and starts to search for the papers and plans that led to the development of the original machine, which he finds rather suspiciously absent from patents, libraries and such, including the basic science that started the development. After months and months of much digging (not without the nagging feeling of someone always being on his tracks in the process), he finally manages to procure the special parts needed to get it to work, and builds his 'homebrew' variant device. During the building process, he discovers that it isn't nearly as impossibly hard to build the machine as it's everywhere purported to be, and it can be much, much smaller (fitting inside an average room in a house), and gets the bright idea of sharing his plans for it with all the world. Just as the spreading of the plans is impossible to stop, a police riot squad knocks down his door, led by just the government official that always denied his applications. The scientist tells the official basically: "You're too late, soon everyone will know how to make one!", in a rather triumphant tone. The official proceeds to knock him off his feet, cursing him: "Do you even know what you've done?!?" After the scientist picks himself up from the floor, the dejected official explains to him why the use of the device is so heavily controlled: When you're able to see everything, everywhere, inside the last 120 years, what exactly is keeping you from setting the machine not to decades back in time, but just one second? One hundredth? One thousandth? Now that the plans are out in the world, for everyone to see, everyone can have his own copy of the thing, and practically spy on all the world - neighbors, celebrities, politicians, you name it, and there's no way on earth to stop getting viewed, by practically everyone! Then, the official waves the riot squad out of the scientist's home, and then leaves himself, not before practically spitting in his face: *"Welcome to hell!"*

  • @MAGGOT_VOMIT
    @MAGGOT_VOMIT Год назад +10

    Danny has tried nailing himself on a cross in the basement 3 times but always finds it impossible to drive-in the last nail. 😳😵‍💫

  • @Daddyoh94
    @Daddyoh94 Год назад +1

    Probably the best ad-read of any video I've ever seen. Fluid Engine is going to be in my head forever now

  • @calibmatlock
    @calibmatlock Год назад +3

    I definitely thought about 10:06 am thing. Some watches do include am/pm indicators but I would think a ring face is too small.

  • @AletuatheFallen
    @AletuatheFallen Год назад +7

    I remember reading a short story published in the 50's that referenced the story about the guy that went missing ~50 years before he got run over, it was part of an Isaac Asimov anthology (it's from either 1958 or 1953, I can't remember). It's interesting how source materials can be lost in such a short time.

    • @petrmaly9087
      @petrmaly9087 Год назад +2

      It's more like such a story was copied over and over and over again... There are legends such as the seven sleepers in the cave dating back to early christianity. Most European countries have legends of people walking through the underground for a day and a whole year passing on the surface in the meantime.

  • @dat_chip
    @dat_chip Год назад +36

    To anyone in the future: This video is worth traveling back in time to watch!

    • @picklerism
      @picklerism Год назад +1

      I'm from the future and disagree.

    • @HaHa-t4b6m
      @HaHa-t4b6m Год назад

      Ble

    • @XtreeM_FaiL
      @XtreeM_FaiL Год назад

      I don't know. Your today, my yesterday kind a suck.

    • @krisstopher8259
      @krisstopher8259 Год назад

      i'm commenting from the future. it's a day later at least. lol

    • @joelellis7035
      @joelellis7035 Год назад

      Good to know. Watching from the future.

  • @jacksonstarky8288
    @jacksonstarky8288 Год назад +5

    Remember, folks: If "Back to the Future" were made this year, Marty would be travelling to 1993. This makes me feel old, only because I remember seeing the original movie when it came out. From what Simon has said around the Whistlerverse, the year he was born and the year I finished high school might be the same.

  • @jeffjones4654
    @jeffjones4654 Год назад +2

    "Fluid Engine" is what I'm going to call my gangsta techno-bluegrass band.

  • @qlue7881
    @qlue7881 Год назад +4

    I'm waiting for Simon to promote Raid Shadow Legends
    🤣😂

  • @TeamSoraPresents
    @TeamSoraPresents Год назад +36

    If it really were possible for people to time-travel AND actively affect the timeline while doing so, you'd think the present would be better by now.

    • @renaissanceredneck73
      @renaissanceredneck73 Год назад +9

      What's to say this version isn't the better one? It can always be worse. Germany could have won WWII, the Soviets could have won the cold war. We could be living in a crazy authoritarian technically advanced version of the Roman empire. This may be the best possible outcome, hard to tell.

    • @Michael75579
      @Michael75579 Год назад +4

      Depends on exactly what sort of time travel is being used. For example, if wormholes exist and we find a way to stabilise and manipulate them, then we can turn them into time machines. The limitation is that a wormhole can't be used to travel back in time to before it was turned into a time machine, so there would currently be no time travelers in the world.

    • @SuzysRedStripes
      @SuzysRedStripes Год назад +4

      Maybe time travelers are just jerks.

    • @deelee4639
      @deelee4639 Год назад

      ​@@renaissanceredneck73there arealso multiple realities going on at once. So there is a universe where all of those things happened. There is also a universe JFK didn't die the way he did, and a universe where we got off fossil fuels back in the 70s and the same time started using solar panels, theres a universe the internet was released to the public in the 80s instead of the mid 90s... there's a universe Dubya bush lost the 2000 election ....

    • @Bacopa68
      @Bacopa68 Год назад +2

      Unless bad rich people are the only ones who can time travel. Current world is a lot like what they would want.

  • @ArcherSuh4721
    @ArcherSuh4721 Год назад +3

    My personal favorite is how Taylor Swift regularly travels back and forth in time and lives a double life. In our current time, she's a famous popstar. In the past, she's Zeena LaVey, the daughter of Church of Satan founder Anton LaVey. She also uses this ability in order to find hit songs from the future and then steal them before they come out, which explains why she has so many hits.
    Another variation of this story is that Taylor Swift is a clone/reincarnated version of Zeena LaVey... but that's just ridiculous.

  • @katcurnow1934
    @katcurnow1934 Год назад

    Lol gotta love the "how bout it brotha" from whistle boy
    I genuinely enjoy your podcasts, thanks!

  • @pamelamays4186
    @pamelamays4186 Год назад +6

    Simon is alone in his basement office.
    ALLEGEDLY!

  • @frankm.2850
    @frankm.2850 Год назад +2

    What good would.a cell phone do a time traveler? Without the internet and the infrastructure that supports it, a smartphone is basically useless.

    • @alphavasson5387
      @alphavasson5387 Год назад

      Unless the phone also has time traveling abilities

  • @mattalford3932
    @mattalford3932 Год назад +6

    Danny has so many stories maybe he's the time traveler lol.

    • @piperjaycie
      @piperjaycie Год назад +1

      That’s a good point!🤔 His stories are endless and very random.

  • @IanM-id8or
    @IanM-id8or Год назад +2

    The time travel in the first story is even more amazing than you realise - Joni Mitchell didn't release Big Yellow Taxi until 1970, so it would have been hard for it to kill a guy in 1951 ;-)

    • @petrmaly9087
      @petrmaly9087 Год назад

      Yellow taxi service was operating in New York since at least 1909 (Rockwell taxicabs), in London since the 1890s as cars, before that it was horse carriages, also often yellow.

    • @alphavasson5387
      @alphavasson5387 Год назад

      ​@@petrmaly9087r/woosh

  • @markbeards4441
    @markbeards4441 Год назад

    It’s quite surreal when you go through the videos over the years and see the evolution of Simon Whistler. 😀👍

  • @RobiticDuck
    @RobiticDuck Год назад

    Great video Simon, and i love all the duck quacks used in the edits

  • @janlee6188
    @janlee6188 Год назад

    This is by far my favorite channel of yours!

  • @thetruebluestarj4746
    @thetruebluestarj4746 Год назад +3

    I came here for the first time in over a year because metatron did a response to one of your videos. Good to see danny still has a job. It was my biggest concern while watching it.

  • @Makesmistakes
    @Makesmistakes Год назад +1

    0:51- Simon sings “Kumbaya”, forgetting that was a joke from a different video… again…. 😂

  • @VoodooAngel63
    @VoodooAngel63 Год назад +1

    There is a statue in the Egyptian collection of The Field Museum in Chicago that looks EXACTLY like Michael Jackson!!!
    When traveling in Luxembourg during my childhood in the 1970s my family was visiting a museum and saw a painting of me! Obviously it wasn't me, it was several hundred years old but it was such a striking resemblance that other people in the museum even asked me to pose with the painting. Or maybe I'm a Medieval princess.😊

  • @lostbutfreesoul
    @lostbutfreesoul Год назад +1

    Stock trader:
    Let us assume that the trades themselves do exist....
    It is far more likely that an individual with a fake set of paperwork, at that level of involvement, was doing a lot of insider trading. Not so much the 'shady smoke filled room' type of insider trading, but the more organized version of carried out by some large cartel. It would also explain why the government wanted to lean so heavily on this guy. They may have been looking for a certain pattern that would indicate someone is a family member of a big player in the underworld... a family member who has big ears and might have a lose tongue if pressure is put on them.
    One less ear now they had to extract this guy from prison for being stupid with family information.

  • @Zackaria_sMax
    @Zackaria_sMax Год назад +1

    8:45 How could they possibly tell Am vs PM?!

  • @cleverusername9369
    @cleverusername9369 Год назад +1

    My watch has a very small dial that displays the date and moves slowly throughout the day, so for example, today is the 7th, and at 10:07 am it would very clearly read 7, but at 10:07 pm it would already be starting to turn towards 8 as it gets closer to midnight, so you'd be able to tell am from pm

  • @2FRESH-4U
    @2FRESH-4U Год назад +5

    I’ve been traveling through time my whole life

    • @wingerding
      @wingerding 9 месяцев назад

      Just one step backward after another

  • @mho...
    @mho... Год назад +1

    The biggest thing that most "timetravel" storys forget to think about, is the fact that it would also be a "space machine"!
    because, everything always moves, soooo if you travel back in time where you are now, you would end up in empty space, because the planet isnt there yet 🤷‍♂

  • @battlesheep2552
    @battlesheep2552 Год назад +4

    Imagine a timeline in which Hitler won WWII by equipping his troops with the advanced weapons taken from the time travellers trying to kill him.

    • @SoManyRandomRamblings
      @SoManyRandomRamblings Год назад +1

      There are a few of shows made with that concept.

    • @petrmaly9087
      @petrmaly9087 Год назад

      Doesn't make much difference. How many assassins are we talking about? 10 ro 100? What weapons? You aren't gonna take a LaserTurboBlaster 3000 to kill a drunk puking behind a German pub in 1920, a rusty old knife would be enough. And if you do and get captured with it, the more advanced weapon, the harder to manufacture, so if the nazis steal 100 laser blasters, that's all they are gonna have. They actually has relatively advanced weapons, they used some on civilian targets (V1, V2), cut funding to others and rejected the rest, because hitler didn't like the design (StG 44). Most of the army still relied on horses and old, often first world war weapons captured in various countries all over Europe in the beginning of the war.
      The main reason why the allies didn't kill hitler in the last year of the war was that there was no point. Half of his subordinates would be more dangerous enemies if in charge.

    • @dimadobrik4516
      @dimadobrik4516 Год назад

      ​@@petrmaly9087I know this is hypothetical but it doesn't make any sense for them to only have the captured weapons, at least after some time. Theyd pick it apart to figure out how to manufacture them aswell

  • @twocvbloke
    @twocvbloke Год назад +1

    The idea of being observed from the future, our everyday activities being watched, people taking notes of how their ancestors behaved and what activities they got up to, think about that next time you're having a vigorous 5-knuckle shuffle session... :P

  • @lohwenli
    @lohwenli Год назад

    I remember reading Weekly World News. That stuff was *_wild._* Even as a naïve wee lad i was left incredulous after 2-3 issues.
    Headlines included
    -Michael Jackson is pregnant
    -Government building bunker to prepare for Armageddon
    -First human baby born to chimp via in-vitro fertilization

  • @jrfish007
    @jrfish007 Год назад +4

    If any of this was true, wouldn’t there be things we don’t know how to use? 😂

  • @rapaladude
    @rapaladude Год назад

    10:06 is really close to where most analog watches are set for advertising. This can also be seen on display models. It's a good position because it usually isn't in the way of any logo or function window, allowing the whole dial to be seen.

  • @Amehana
    @Amehana Год назад +2

    Yes, it is indeed a watch on a ring. I remember those. I wanted one but my fingers were too small when I was bothering my dad for one (even as an adult until recently). I got a nice wrist watch instead.

  • @jaydephoenix8712
    @jaydephoenix8712 Год назад +1

    People always ignore a specific detail about time travel... If you jump years in either direction, you're going to pop into open space and die.
    The planet is moving. The solar system is moving. The galaxy is moving. 65 million years ago, the planet was on the opposite side of the galaxy to where it is now. Go back to see the end of the dinos, and you're going to be in open, interstellar space. 😂

    • @SoManyRandomRamblings
      @SoManyRandomRamblings Год назад

      Exactly. Best chance of it being successful is a wormhole. But for it to be stable it would have to be anchored at both ends....which means we would only have access to it for a brief period of time before it was no longer on our planet but "left behind" in space and time. So if you were to go through unless you immediately returned you would also end up in empty space (or INSIDE another celestial body)

  • @stigmaoftherose
    @stigmaoftherose Год назад +1

    How to look backward in time: move a certain number of light years away from earth at a speed faster than light, then look back toawrds earth and the light boucing off earth will be back in time, obviously you probably can see much as the earth will be so small at such a distance but its still technically possible.

  • @fredhannum4015
    @fredhannum4015 9 месяцев назад

    I inherited something, in 1970 when I was 12 years old. When my great aunt told me how important it was, I couldn't comprehend how important it was. She told me, how it came to be in our families possession, it sounded too incredible. She told me that, the other members of the family, thought it was too important to be passed to someone so young, but that she thought, I was the right person to receive it. I believe it to be a time travel device because of the events that have happened to me and my family. There are too many things to list here, but I can say that I have met many famous people and been at many events that have changed and affected our society. Many times these meetings with some of my heroes, seemed to be 'coincidence' but maybe not. It appears to allow travel back in time not forward. As many of these events, happened before the device came into our possession. My Great Uncle received it in 1923. I can't really discuss where it came from, due to current popularity of repatriation, but I can say that he received it legally, from the head of state at that time. His name was David Smith, and he was a Captain for White Star steamship lines. Many members of my family have been involved in shipbuilding and sailing profession.

  • @chrisyanover1777
    @chrisyanover1777 Год назад +2

    Simon, If I could turn back time! If I could find a way. I'd take back all the things that would hurt you, and you would stay! If I could reach the stars. I'd give them all all to you! Then you would love me, love me. Like you used to do!

  • @SwitchKrookedGrind
    @SwitchKrookedGrind Год назад +1

    I'm not even joking. That last "Fluid Engine" really did it for me 😊

  • @AgentOracle
    @AgentOracle Год назад +6

    The funniest thing you said in the entire episode, (which was quite funny) was that "Mark Zuckerberg does actual fighting"... That man's arms are so thin you could give him cheerio cereal as a bracelet.

    • @obmarte3803
      @obmarte3803 Год назад +2

      And the fact Elon Musk has a black belt in Brazilian Jui-jitsu.

    • @petrmaly9087
      @petrmaly9087 Год назад

      But, but, but... he won a medal... in a local competition... in featherweight category... among the white belt fighters. That's gonna eliminate the problem of being half a head shorter and 1/3 of a person lighter than Musk.

    • @worldcomicsreview354
      @worldcomicsreview354 Год назад

      ​@@petrmaly9087But he is also an emotionless android from 2637, so there is that.

    • @petrmaly9087
      @petrmaly9087 Год назад

      @@worldcomicsreview354 Of course he has to be emotionless. If he cries, he rusts.

  • @Onewheelordeal
    @Onewheelordeal Год назад +2

    Simon you need your own app or something so I can watch new Simon content without having to check several channels

  • @katwitanruna
    @katwitanruna Год назад +1

    Actually physicists now say that time travel is theoretically possible but not practical at this point in space and time.

  • @jandrews8365
    @jandrews8365 Год назад +1

    I'm sure Squarespace loves the ad placement on this one.

  • @johnvaughan8239
    @johnvaughan8239 Год назад

    Literally the first thing that I thought when you said it was stuck on 10:06 am was, “How did they know it was am?” Lol

  • @LorriBaker-nq8rs
    @LorriBaker-nq8rs Год назад +3

    During my rebellious years i found myself in the county jail with a friend who shares the same tribal heritage in about the same proportions and resembles me as much as to appear surely to, at very least, to be my half-sister.. no relation. Guards were calling BS until I pointed 👉 that their computers could access our data.. and we got to laugh our @$$e$ off at the looks on their faces..😂❤

  • @vampcaff
    @vampcaff Год назад +1

    @16:20 or, i know this sounds crazy but maybe, just maybe she was talking to the people literally standing right next to her and she was just itching her face.

    • @SoManyRandomRamblings
      @SoManyRandomRamblings Год назад

      Especially since......ever tried to use a cell phone without a cell tower in range? Lol.

  • @ninehundreddollarluxuryyac5958
    @ninehundreddollarluxuryyac5958 Год назад +3

    People can have an amazing resemblance to other unrelated people at times. Which probably explains gold rush Greta Thornburg. Another hilarious example would be Trump's former attorney general Bill Barr, and the actor who played commodore Matt Decker in the original star trek series episode "The Doomsday Machine". The physical resemblance is amazing, and truly hilarious if you play back the part of the episode where he kamikazes a shuttle into the doomsday machine. The faces he makes are truly epic.

    • @SoManyRandomRamblings
      @SoManyRandomRamblings Год назад +1

      Exactly. Plus there are only so many combinations of options for faces..... so of course there are goimg to be "repeats"

  • @evilblack2416
    @evilblack2416 8 месяцев назад

    "The lottery is just an elaborate trap to catch time travellers"
    i'm totally using that line from now on. Personally i've always said it's not really a game but a tax on people with poor math skills, but the time traveller trap clearly makes much more sense.

  • @AlexSandul
    @AlexSandul Год назад +2

    Yay new business blaze

  • @Caleb1874ya
    @Caleb1874ya Год назад +2

    My friends dad found a picture from when his band was playing a rather well known music venue (Tipitinas) in 1977 and were arriving to venue in Red Limousine and they are a Funk band so lots of collars and sparkles and THEN YOU SEE ME…. Like just kinda off in the back just chillin like I do now at that same club….only thing I was born in 1979…. If I could post the picture it’s pretty funny… and idk what’s better that I get a time machine or that I use said time machine to GO SEE FUNK SHOWS FROM 70’s…. Which is in fact what I would do… so idk it legitimately looks EXACTLY like me down to my facial hair and style hat… so let’s hope I get so see some James Brown Band and EARTH WIND & FIRE…. Oh and my friends dad is the late GREAT Mr. Mardi Gras Mambo aka Poppa Funk Mr. Art Neville of THE METERS: The Best Band Ever

  • @ingrid_mxx
    @ingrid_mxx Год назад +1

    I need an episode about project blue beam...idk if there is one, simon has too many channels 😂

  • @nova9sw
    @nova9sw Год назад +1

    Donald Chump is an ancient alien time traveler ......

  • @kenneybis1097
    @kenneybis1097 Год назад

    Perspective is everything, many of the stars we see in the night sky have already burned out and we are seeing them as they appeared millions of years ago. Basically we are looking back in time any time we look up at the night sky..

  • @bazzer124
    @bazzer124 Год назад +2

    Einstein said time is an illusion. We measure it as sequence of events but can't really define it. BTW, time travel is real. The Easter Bunny told me. Cheers....

  • @5minsoffish
    @5minsoffish Год назад

    Man everybody is quick. Either way. Hooray for a new Brain Blaze and being here within the first min of upload... always a nice surprise.

  • @jonasholm-mw5bn
    @jonasholm-mw5bn Год назад +3

    That would be kind of fun. They’re inventing timetravel and it’s just this portal where you can see what’s going on. The first one is just some random guy and he whatever e did will forever be known and studied because it was just that time they happened to be able to see

  • @SESauvie
    @SESauvie Год назад +5

    It is so refreshing to see somebody talk about these kinds of things and just logic the stories into submission.
    I wish that last story was real though, would have been very neat.

  • @adammcinnes5615
    @adammcinnes5615 Год назад

    I'm surprised that John Titor didn't make the list of time travelers.
    For those not familiar with the story, between 2000-2001, on online forums, someone going by the name of John Titor claimed to be an American military time traveler from 2036. He said that he had originally been sent back to 1975 to retrieve an IBM 5100 computer to debug something in the computers of his day, but he decided to stop off on his way home to attend to some personal matters and warn people about future events (including hinting that he had helped to stop the Y2K bug from having devastating effects).
    No proof was ever presented, his narrative made his predictions unfalsifiable, and it's considered to have been a hoax.

  • @Bill-jc1fy
    @Bill-jc1fy Год назад +1

    Even if you had a cell phone 60 years ago there would be no cell towers so you couldn't use it.

  • @infidelcastro5129
    @infidelcastro5129 Год назад

    I’ve loved this episode since I first watched it next Tuesday.

  • @gregoryheim9781
    @gregoryheim9781 Год назад +1

    Plot twist: The two college students that looked like brothers, actually had the same father.

    • @nealjroberts4050
      @nealjroberts4050 Год назад

      One was the other 's father...

    • @gregoryheim9781
      @gregoryheim9781 Год назад +1

      @nealjroberts4050 Except that a father and son wouldn't look like brothers.
      Just because you can change a little of someone's comment doesn't make it a new comment (this isn't Reddit). And often times it's just plain stupid (even on Reddit). So congratulations for not being able to stop being a Reddit fanboy for a few minutes in your day. Apparently, you can only do one thing. And only do it poorly.

  • @veteranrebuild5661
    @veteranrebuild5661 Год назад +1

    Are we going to ignore how during Simons growth to power, big brain and fame that he was ALWAYS confused with Michael stevens from V Sauce?

  • @blitzthose
    @blitzthose Год назад

    My brain did a werid thing, Simon spamming Fluid Engine, made me thing of Mickey from the League of Gentlemen and his Spamming of "Fire Engine"

  • @Nipplator99999999999
    @Nipplator99999999999 Год назад +1

    Not the private moment he referenced, it was more related to whipping the special mayo manually.

    • @MorbinNecrim86
      @MorbinNecrim86 Год назад

      Yea the private moment more fun than taking a dump

  • @xybalba
    @xybalba Год назад

    Thanks for saying I'm a big brain, I needed that today

  • @MAGGOT_VOMIT
    @MAGGOT_VOMIT Год назад +1

    Club all Cig-Thieves and Greta, like Baby Fur-Seals!! 🦭😆 😆

  • @puteminyomouf
    @puteminyomouf Год назад

    Was on the verge of falling asleep, but then I woke up to Simon creepily whispering "fluid engine".

  • @thegreatpotat0948
    @thegreatpotat0948 Год назад

    OK, now I really want to be on the inside part of the joke with the "kumbaya, my lord"

  • @JordanLane7
    @JordanLane7 Год назад +1

    4 MINUTES AND 43 SECONDS UNTIL YOU ACTUALLY GET TO CONTENT. Love you’re videos though mate, just maybe shorten the intros/ads

  • @variaxi935
    @variaxi935 Год назад +1

    ohhhh it's like this video was perfectly tailored to me at this moment oh Simon you beautiful bald maniac I love you

  • @SneezingEagle
    @SneezingEagle Год назад +3

    Fluid engine seems somewhat fitting for a time travel blaze

  • @dark4x440
    @dark4x440 10 месяцев назад

    Danny causing Simon to worry that people are watching him. Simon there's millions of us 😈 we're always watching you.

  • @thisistherevolt
    @thisistherevolt Год назад

    Did not expect to see The Spiffing Brit's avatar in a Simon Whistler video lol

  • @theofficialken1755
    @theofficialken1755 Год назад +1

    I'd leave a copy of Frampton comes alive in Tuts tomb.

  • @wolfieworby5653
    @wolfieworby5653 Год назад

    Great. Now I'm sat repeating "FluidEngine!" At random. Thanks whistleboy... 😅😂

  • @worldcomicsreview354
    @worldcomicsreview354 Год назад

    I used to teach a 12 year old kid English, then I got a compilation record from 1962 and one of the singers was her! Looked so similar.

  • @ComradeQuagsire
    @ComradeQuagsire Год назад

    Love going back in time with my cell phone and getting 5 bars from all the cell towers that existed in the 1930s

  • @DNS-FRANK09
    @DNS-FRANK09 Год назад

    Simon has either like a million channels or he's got a bunch of clones either one is really cool 😎

  • @chefdean7257
    @chefdean7257 Год назад

    Anyone ever notice how time travel movies never address the time/SPACE correlation ? If I travel back in time a month, I'm floating in space, where Earth was, last month.
    "Am I Right, Peter ?!?"🤓

  • @nDndAd
    @nDndAd Год назад

    The Red Bull is strong with this one. Damn, Simon was wired af! lol

  • @ReverentVengeance
    @ReverentVengeance Год назад

    I laughed harder than I should’ve at the Yoshi bit

  • @williamwilkins8037
    @williamwilkins8037 Год назад

    You should do an video about out-of-place artifacts and the possible explanations for them

    • @williamwilkins8037
      @williamwilkins8037 Год назад

      We all know how reliable Google is lol but it says Elon Musk was born in 1971, not 1981