These guys are great. They seem like 2 guys that completely changed their lives. Its incredible to see someone this far in the recovery process. Cheers to these guys
I've never experienced anyone in recovery that has ever even attempted to make amends. They just make excuses. It's a good learning experience for me. But I wish everyone who actually does try to make amends the best of luck. You're probably on the right track if you're watching this video. I wish more people would do so.
Hi Amber. It's me again just watched your new video on Breaking the Cycle on Guilt Shame and Resentment and left a comment. Re this video. To be honest, l really needed to know more on making amends. I was quite sceptical and cynical about what this process involved. Especially just how deeply feeling, honest and genuine an ex addict needs to be to rally make amends. You covered all the areas l had doubts about, and what should really be included in an heartfelt, geuine apology from an Addict to a loved one they had treated appallingly. Also, it was very interesting, suprising and informative to be realise just how strong, decent, humble and honest a Sober Addict can become in time. Thanks to the guys for their contribution.
Thank-you Amber, David and Lucas. One's Authentic True Self in humble gratitude is a true amend. Yes show up in the now and be in the now and Love, always know every moment in life is special and precious.💞👍👍👏👏 Yes one must totally ""get that"" and prove it.💜
Dear Amber, I love your videos, they've got me through so many hard times!! I want to ask if you can make a video for loved ones of addicts, about how we can forgive the addict in our life? I am having a hell of a time letting go of the past & all the wrongdoings. Any tips you have would be so appreciated!
I would love to find a video that I could send to my family to help them prepare for my amends. They do not really understand the amends process. For example I got sober when my nephew was 1.5 and my sister seems to think my amends is making up for that lost time and support by now babysitting him for her an inordinate amount.
Thank you all 3 so much. I'm in the process of stepping to that stage of making ammends with several family members. I'm not sure if I am going to be able to word my letters as well as you guys spoke them. I will be honest & humble myself.
@@PutTheShovelDown To the people that I've harmed, they don't wanna hear that "well I'm sorry" bullshit when they wanted the money for the damage I had done over the years because saying sorry turns me sorry.
I can think of a situation where I got upset and, in hindsight, I could have or maybe should have handled it differently than I did. But I also kinda feel like my reaction was justified and he had it coming and maybe he even deserved worse. 🤔
What happens when someone makes amends with people who are not close, a non factor in our lives, but not to the one closest to them? I feel like I deserve it the most, but will either be last, or never.
It probably feels easier to make amends with people who aren't as close. Sometimes people have a heard time saying it, but they may show you through there actions.
Hi there. 14 months sober, getting ready to do this step w my sponsor. Mmy daughter is 18 and just had a baby. She told me that her daughter needs stability. Still no trust. Im starting a letter for her today. . wish me luck. Time to be brave. I know sometimes its too late. I have hope though. Any suggestion's?
@@SS-cd6ie HAve you done that amend yet+ If not, talk to ppl in the groups, share about it, that will generate ideas in yourself and help your HP to give you insights, sureness. And writing abóut it helps too. Sponsor should support and guide you too. I am not being sponsred as often and deeply and comprehensively as I need, so I have made some mistakes and it all takes too long. But mistakes can be learnt from. For me, the fear eased as I pictured Not making the A. and not getting the benefit of the promises in step 9 , BB. And as I decided to do it despite my fear, the fear eased. The soul and the brain need our decision, a task, a goal, because before that, the brain and soul are at a loss. Cf it to dog who is messing about and barking because its master neglects mastering it and telling it what to do. The dog wants and needs to be led, so do we. by our better selves co-working w our HP and God. Good luck! I am struggling and getting on.
As crestons wife I hear what you are saying but it can be difficult when they don't have anything to be sorry for I mean truly everything is always somebody else's fault it's the person they hit with their fault it's the person who they hit it's their fault it's not the one who caused the car wreck to happen it's the cops fault it's their mother fault it's always someone else fault I'm like forget I'm not making amends with those kinds of people I just avoid them when all they do is blame everyone else when they caused the wreck or whatever they did all they can say is I'm sorry I'm like so what you say you are sorry if are truly sorry where is the amends even if they do it's just for a little while then they are breaking the rules of your home and manipulating you again I'm tired of making amends with these kinds of people I just avoid them I'm not waiting for them to change when all they do is same things over and over only in a different way I don't have time for those people let them drown I'm not drowning with them I don't want them to drown but I'm not going to drown with them either
Hi. My thinking has gotten so bad. I had a really cool co-worker, but my negative thinking mess it all up. He kept reassuring me it was not me!!! He has moved on got another job. Found out that he left because of this place, but also me!! It has been over a year, want to call him so bad and meet up with him, talk to him face to face. I chicken out, I am a POS. I HATE THIS !! YOU DON'T DO THIS!! ANY HELP WOULD BE GREATLY APPRECIATED 🙏 PL
So, advice on making an amends to an ex should not happen? Just delete them from your life? I’m confused about that part. If you’re clear and up front then why not?
I think your just not supposed to stir up there emotions and make them believe you want back in. You have to let them go on with their life. It's the kind thing to do
If you'd like to know more about David and Lucas' young men's living program visit www.greenvilletransitions.com
These guys are great. They seem like 2 guys that completely changed their lives. Its incredible to see someone this far in the recovery process. Cheers to these guys
I've never experienced anyone in recovery that has ever even attempted to make amends. They just make excuses. It's a good learning experience for me. But I wish everyone who actually does try to make amends the best of luck. You're probably on the right track if you're watching this video. I wish more people would do so.
Exactly. They just want to offload their guilty conscience and then make excuses, no genuine accountability or compassion for those they hurt.
Very helpful and nice of them to share
Hi Amber.
It's me again just watched your new video on Breaking the Cycle on Guilt Shame and Resentment and left a comment.
Re this video. To be honest, l really needed to know more on making amends.
I was quite sceptical and cynical about what this process involved. Especially just how deeply feeling, honest and genuine an ex addict needs to be to rally make amends.
You covered all the areas l had doubts about, and what should really be included in an heartfelt, geuine apology from an Addict to a loved one they had treated appallingly.
Also, it was very interesting, suprising and informative to be realise just how strong, decent, humble and honest a Sober Addict can become in time.
Thanks to the guys for their contribution.
Thanks Mary, David and Lucas are great 💖
thankyou for making this video. It gave me the courage to make amends and they accepted
Thank-you Amber, David and Lucas. One's Authentic True Self in humble gratitude is a true amend. Yes show up in the now and be in the now and Love, always know every moment in life is special and precious.💞👍👍👏👏
Yes one must totally ""get that"" and prove it.💜
David and Lucas are great guys. I strong reminder of how different life can be
@@PutTheShovelDown Yes..agreed😊💜💜💖💖💞👍👍👏👏
I really needed to hear this. Thank You
You are so welcome
PRECIOUS video. Thank you so much
You can watch David's full story here: ruclips.net/video/qu7_idmI_sE/видео.html
and Lucas' full story here: ruclips.net/video/IWMEnO5PIDY/видео.html
Wonderful video. Thanks.
Dear Amber, I love your videos, they've got me through so many hard times!! I want to ask if you can make a video for loved ones of addicts, about how we can forgive the addict in our life? I am having a hell of a time letting go of the past & all the wrongdoings. Any tips you have would be so appreciated!
I would love to find a video that I could send to my family to help them prepare for my amends. They do not really understand the amends process. For example I got sober when my nephew was 1.5 and my sister seems to think my amends is making up for that lost time and support by now babysitting him for her an inordinate amount.
Thank you all 3 so much. I'm in the process of stepping to that stage of making ammends with several family members. I'm not sure if I am going to be able to word my letters as well as you guys spoke them. I will be honest & humble myself.
You got this!
Truth is, saying sorry versus asking what I can do to fix what carnage I had cause are two very different things!
💯You're absolutely right. You hit the nail on the head!
@@PutTheShovelDown To the people that I've harmed, they don't wanna hear that "well I'm sorry" bullshit when they wanted the money for the damage I had done over the years because saying sorry turns me sorry.
I can think of a situation where I got upset and, in hindsight, I could have or maybe should have handled it differently than I did. But I also kinda feel like my reaction was justified and he had it coming and maybe he even deserved worse. 🤔
What about something you did sober when you were 11?
I think that making amends is almost always helpful. It doesn't have to be related to an addiction.
Nice video. Thanks
Thanks Joe Mama! Fun user name BTW😄. How’d you find our channel?
Thanks Joe Mama! Fun user name BTW😄. How’d you find our channel?
What happens when someone makes amends with people who are not close, a non factor in our lives, but not to the one closest to them? I feel like I deserve it the most, but will either be last, or never.
It probably feels easier to make amends with people who aren't as close. Sometimes people have a heard time saying it, but they may show you through there actions.
Hi there. 14 months sober, getting ready to do this step w my sponsor. Mmy daughter is 18 and just had a baby. She told me that her daughter needs stability. Still no trust. Im starting a letter for her today. . wish me luck. Time to be brave. I know sometimes its too late. I have hope though. Any suggestion's?
Should I make amends for stealing from my friend?? She knows I stole but we never talked about it. It's super embarassing.
I think making amends will help you not to have to feel embarrassed about it anymore.
@@PutTheShovelDown thank you. I have worked the steps but still making amends and was struggling with this one. It's very powerful!
@@SS-cd6ie HAve you done that amend yet+ If not, talk to ppl in the groups, share about it, that will generate ideas in yourself and help your HP to give you insights, sureness.
And writing abóut it helps too. Sponsor should support and guide you too. I am not being sponsred as often and deeply and comprehensively as I need, so I have made some mistakes and it all takes too long. But mistakes can be learnt from. For me, the fear eased as I pictured Not making the A. and not getting the benefit of the promises in step 9 , BB. And as I decided to do it despite my fear, the fear eased.
The soul and the brain need our decision, a task, a goal, because before that, the brain and soul are at a loss. Cf it to dog who is messing about and barking because its master neglects mastering it and telling it what to do. The dog wants and needs to be led, so do we. by our better selves co-working w our HP and God. Good luck! I am struggling and getting on.
As crestons wife I hear what you are saying but it can be difficult when they don't have anything to be sorry for I mean truly everything is always somebody else's fault it's the person they hit with their fault it's the person who they hit it's their fault it's not the one who caused the car wreck to happen it's the cops fault it's their mother fault it's always someone else fault I'm like forget I'm not making amends with those kinds of people I just avoid them when all they do is blame everyone else when they caused the wreck or whatever they did all they can say is I'm sorry I'm like so what you say you are sorry if are truly sorry where is the amends even if they do it's just for a little while then they are breaking the rules of your home and manipulating you again I'm tired of making amends with these kinds of people I just avoid them I'm not waiting for them to change when all they do is same things over and over only in a different way I don't have time for those people let them drown I'm not drowning with them I don't want them to drown but I'm not going to drown with them either
Is this person in recovery?
Hi.
My thinking has gotten so bad.
I had a really cool co-worker, but my negative thinking mess it all up.
He kept reassuring me it was not me!!!
He has moved on got another job. Found out that he left because of this place, but also me!!
It has been over a year, want to call him so bad and meet up with him, talk to him face to face.
I chicken out, I am a POS.
I HATE THIS !!
YOU DON'T DO THIS!!
ANY HELP WOULD BE GREATLY APPRECIATED 🙏
PL
You DO NOT know the definition of making amends!!!
It IS NOT APOLOGIZING!!
Making amends is doing what ever you can to MAKE THINGS RIGHT!
This is what I thought I was like man did she actually do the steps or read it online.
I apologize for. Everything
💓💓💓💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻
I last apologize
this is fabulous...please consider removing the pictures of the dead tigers. It is horrifying.
😑
⁰
So, advice on making an amends to an ex should not happen? Just delete them from your life? I’m confused about that part. If you’re clear and up front then why not?
I think your just not supposed to stir up there emotions and make them believe you want back in. You have to let them go on with their life. It's the kind thing to do