Real Talk on Menopause: My Story
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- Опубликовано: 11 сен 2024
- Today I'm sharing the real truth (real real) about this phase of my life and what it means to me. We HAVE to get menopause out of the shadows and start having the real conversations about what it means for us, our families, and our communities. Because it's not just hot flashes and mood swings, it's an entire phase of life. And I'm DONE acting like it's no big deal.
#menopause #jenlefforge
Here are books that have helped me on my journey (all are affiliate links but as always if you have a local bookshop please order from them!):
•Christine Northrup The Wisdom of Menopause → amzn.to/3TkinQa
•Falling Upward by Richard Rohr → amzn.to/3dW7rId
•The Body Keeps The Score → amzn.to/3ApDpnH
•Brene Brown Gifts of Imperfection → amzn.to/3e4KlPu
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Everything you said resonates with me, the anxiety, the food, the fogginess, the knee arthritis, the regret, etc. So tough.
My anxiety is also off the charts. I used one of those horrible bags on a recent flight. I was moving my daughter to Disney for DCP, missed our connection due to our first flight. Lost our first class seat. Thankfully I was able to get my daughter and her cat into first on the new flight because her cat wasn’t going to fit in coach. My daughter heard me get sick and she was so worried about me. The flight attendants were horrible. Since I had a double mastectomy a few years ago so I felt this white lid was ok. As I was leaving the plane with my 🤮bag in my hand because they wouldn’t take it. I said in a pretty loud voice “cancer really is a bitch,right” the look on their faces was priceless. I hope they learned at least a little about compassion.
Oh and you’ve got this!!!
OMG the part when you said I still feel like I am 12, 24, 30 inside. I have said that too. You feel the same inside but then you look in the mirror or you bend over to pick up something, the body ages but inside you feel the same. Thank you for this and ALL your videos, never stop.
I’m 45 and was thrust into surgical menopause a week before Christmas. You are the first person in my life to share anything about what to expect. I’m going through the spiritual exorcism in particular and am so grateful to have a good therapist. You covered all the things we have been covering and I just want to say thank you.
I’m currently sitting on an airplane and spiritual exorcism made me laugh Loudly. Best of luck on your journey!!🤩🤩🤩
More of this, please! We are a year apart, and I’m totally here for some true talk. As someone who works from home, with no coworkers, and no sisters, I’m so thankful I’ve found your channels. You are not just helpful. You’ve made me feel normal in so many ways. Thank you!
As a woman who is beyond menopause I can say it gets better. Having a child leave and go out on his own is truly a blessing- you did a fabulous job as a Momma - don’t look at it as a loss, look at it as a wonderful beginning!! You raised an independent human, secure enough to move out of the nest. Now it’s YOUR time. I have four kiddos, all wonderful adults - who still ‘need’ me. I also have 5 grand babies and one on way. Life truly opens up in the next stage. Embrace it!xoxo
Never has anyone resonated with me more than you right now! I teared up about still being all the ages behind your eyes…I’ve rewound and played it several times🙌🏻. Eloquently stated. I am a lifetime member of insomniacs are us and sweating it out…menopause made it all worse (surgically induced at age 39 so 18 years ago. I’m tired of justifying feeling blah…mental and physical states aren’t playing well with each other and I need to fix that. I taught 5 year olds for many years…I’ve raised 4 children including twins…I can do this🙌🏻
You absolutely can, Sara!!!!!
While I am still a good ways away from this period of life, I can't even tell you how much I admire and commend you for sharing your story and experiences, Jen. I agree that this subject is not talked about NEARLY enough and as someone who has yet to experience it for myself, that worries and concerns me. So thank you for, as always, using your platform to start meaningful and important conversations! ❤️
Jill I hope this helped you feel a bit more prepared for a weird time!!
My mom birthed me at age 16, so we aren’t that far apart in age. This was a HUGE eye-opener to help me understand her better. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!! I’ll be 37 this year, and this is the most I’ve heard on the topic. There’s plenty more room for this kind of content. Please don’t stop sharing!
Oh man Jenn!! I wanted to give you a hug right there when you were saying you are still the same girl. You got me emotional. I agree with everything you said.
Thank you for that because I wasn’t 100% sure people wouldn’t be like what are you talking about?!?!🥰🥰🥰
Thank you so much for this video. I turned 50 this year, and over the past 12 months or so, I've gone from "lightweight worry" to "constant, creeping sense of doom." Real, restorative sleep is a rarity at a time in my life when I have the most to do (thanks, Universe). Your comment about certain foods translating into bodily pain resonated with me enormously. That's been the most recent - and frankly, weird - addition to my new decade. Thank you for being so genuine.
As a mom of two young boys, I always appreciate when you talk about parenting adult children. I don’t hear enough moms talking about how to have a good, healthy relationship with their adult children. Thank you for talking about how these events are happening at the same time as these other changes. Thank you for your honesty about this and all things 💕
More like these please! I’m 53 and I’ve almost hit that full year without a period! We need to be talking about menopause more! I was so happy to see the title to your video when i opened up RUclips tonight!
Thank you for this! So much resonance! Friend said “when you are closer to your death than your Senior prom it messes with you”… SO TRUE! Lost several female friends lately and not to accidents, to heart attacks in their sleep. I will soon be the age 53/54 they were when they passed. I have realized I want to feel like I did driving down the back country roads with my best friend when we were 16 years old again… but NOW, not wistfully remembering. Not sure how to get there, but I suspect much baggage to let go of along the way. To all those who are in this too and the people who love them HANG IN 💛
Thank you Jen. I am more than 20 years past my last period. But have not had any of the "normal" symptoms of menopause. Now at almost 68 I'm experiencing almost every thing that you talked about. Thanks for letting me know I'm not loosing my mind.
Jen, this was powerful. First, all the best to you and your family in the big life transition of your son moving on his own. This video is very important, not only for me (I'm going through perimenopause myself and its hitting me hard) but for the women who are approaching this time (or are in it) who NEED to hear this wisdom. I am a therapist and work with women in mid-life and I can't put a number on how many of them are feeling the bubbling up of traumas from their past and unaddressed pain (mental, physical, and spiritual). Or traumas that have been dealt with before, but are being seen in a whole new light. I could go on and on on that for days..... As you said so well, this is a chance we get to address these things now. Also- despite my profession, all of these issues are true for me too! Jen, you are so not alone. In fact, you are right on point! Our anxiety is sky high not just for ourselves and our lives but for our kids and the planet! I've had many sleepless nights and moments of great doubt about my ability to help others when I'm also going through so much internal transition into this phase of life at this time- specially in the past two years. Add some political and cultural unrest and oh boy, its enough to make our pot boil over. Anyway, you are wonderful. Please keep using your voice as you are.
Thank you for this comment. The mental health piece is no neglected by so many of us and coming from you this means a lot. Hang in there!!
We lost my mom when she was only 69 and neither my sister nor I ever talked with her about menopause or when she went through it. We as women need to have safe places for these discussions and thank you for encouraging discussion without preaching that what is working for you is what we all need to to.
THIS. It's very real and I don't want the only voices in the space to be the ones that are selling us something!
What an incredibly heartfelt video. After a year of hot flashes every 20 minutes I went on HRT and it was like someone hit the light switch. I’ve since backed off a bit with my doctor’s blessing to see if I NEED to take it every day….I don’t. Love a good doctor, so important. You saying you are your 12 year old self…right in the feels…
Yes to the good doctors!!
Loved this video ❤I just turned 50, and I've been freaking out. I have struggled with anxiety all my life.😢 been in perimenopause since about 45.
When I began taking medication for hypothyroidism ALL the symptoms you mentioned got so much better. One day I woke up and realized my joints didn’t hurt when I woke up, and hadn’t been. Then I realized that my anxiety was so much better and I was able to sleep all night, as well as, I wasn’t completely exhausted all the time. I feel blessed to have been diagnosed because the medication was life changing. I was convinced I had arthritis, and it was just a problem that came along with aging. I’m so thankful to my doctor for figuring this out when I only went in for blood pressure issues. I had googled my symptoms so many times and I knew I had thyroid issues, but I guess it has to be so bad before you can actually get a diagnosis.
Thanks for sharing.
I didn't know I needed this so much today. My mom has talked to me a bit about her experience, but I live overseas and those conversations are hard to have from a distance. I'm 44 and know that I've been in perimenopause for several years, but life on the mission field has also led to a lot of stress and trauma. I'm only now realizing that one has definitely affected the other, and that there are also things that I thought were stress/trauma responses that are related to perimenopause. We VERY much need more open conversation about this stage. I also really loved what you said about being all of our ages at this point in life. One of my big struggles as a wife and mom has been that feeling of losing myself in the midst of doing life, but as my kids get older I'm now realizing I haven't "lost" those things, they have been seasons and I'm now in a place where I can feed those parts of myself again. I think we need to talk about that more, and how we can age well in all seasons of our lives.
Also - thank you for talking about anxiety!! I've been experiencing anxiety in a way I never have in life, and it was so refreshing to hear that it's not "me" it's the changes my body is going through. Helps ease my mind a bit :)
This video spoke so directly to me. I agree with everything. As women we need to advocate more for ourselves at this time of life. There is just so much that the medical field does not know about this period. I had no clue what to expect with peri and menopause. I did not realize who my body, soul, and psyche would change.
You are speaking to me 🥹😭 I’m 39 soon to be 40 and I’m struggling. Thank you for sharing. I appreciate you.❤
Thank you so much for this video ! Watching here in UK thinking why didn’t anyone talk to me about all this stuff! 59 and not fully menopausal and it’s been a difficult ten or more years.
Really appreciate all your content, found you via a DVC search and now really enjoy what you do. Thank you for speaking so openly.
Aww, I loved this. It definitely needs to be talked about more. Aging as a woman is so hard, emotionally AND physically. The hardest part is finding others to talk about it with. Thank you for being vulnerable for others!!! 👍🏻😊
This video spoke to me in so many ways. I am 50 and experiencing so many of these things. Thank so much!
More of these videos please.
My frustration is when you go to medical professionals, regardless of their practice is the “well you are of that age” and brushing symptoms aside. I decided against hrt don’t regret that, most of my physical symptoms were manageable. The lack of ability to concentrate and mind fog bothers me way than the physical things. No secret remedies, other than this to will pass.
I’m just starting the video and I don’t know if you’ll see this since it’s 3 weeks old, but I’m so thankful for people like you who are willing to talk about these kinds of topics. Originally I was going to skip this video. I’m 37, so menopause seems far away. However, I was reading a Reddit thread recently and menopause/peri menopause came up and I realized: I don’t know much about it. And that was the same with the pretty overwhelming majority of the commenters. So I started reading. And it clicked that I’ve had some symptoms of just the beginning of perimenopause over the last year. I just saw my gyn for my annual and brought it up and she was so helpful and understanding. I feel young for this but she said it can last for 5-10 years so it’s really not unusual for someone to start seeing those symptoms at my age. So now that your video popped up again, I was thankful that you happened to post about this.
I'm so glad you're on the path to getting the help you need!!! And we are all so different and it can be exhausting and you just want to lay down:). Thanks for telling me the video helped, Becca! That means a lot to me.
Thanks for talking about this. Just turned 50 and did the blood tests. I had a huge talk with my doctor. Please more videos. We need this community. Thanks Jen. Have a great trip.
I’m 63 and reached menopause at 51. About a dozen hot flashes per day (none at night), went on HRT and within 24 hours, I had maybe one hot flash! Stayed on it for 6 years but then went off of it because I developed a small polyp and a small fibroid. I do notice I can’t eat as many sweets as I was used to - I never had a problem with weight, but have gained about 10-12 pounds in the last 8-10 years. The big thing for me is that I feel I’ve developed menopausal ADHD - I can’t think about anything too long, so I haven’t finished a book since age 51, can’t concentrate on understanding anything financial related (which I need to understand). I feel 1) unmotivated 2) overwhelmed 3) fragmented.
Not sure what to do with all that, and I agree with the whole needing to face things and get down to brass tacks, so to speak…I just can’t seem to concentrate enough and am unmotivated to deal!
Thank you so much for this. I feel every word you said in my heart. I am 53, in the perimenopause time. Periods are erratic. I feel like Al Pacino "Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in". I have amazing doctors, an internist and a gynecologist (both women) who have brought the subject up to me , rather than the other way around. Acknowledging that this is hard helps so much. Body image issues, anxiety, fatigue . Questioning my value/worth while still wanting to be a role model of strength and resilience for my young adult daughters. This stage of being human should be one the most important topics of conversation! Thank you for being brave enough to start a meaningful discourse. I feel better knowing that we are all in it together
I love a good Godfather reference 😂❤️
Gosh, you nailed it. The example of being boiled and everything is coming to the surface is exactly it. My physical symptoms have been mild but emotionally I’ve been turned upside down. You are the first person to articulate what I have been feeling. It brought me to tears.
That makes my day and humbled me and thank you. In it with you!
Thank you for this! I am almost 52, have now missed 3 periods. I must say I was ready to embrace this period of my life, the freedom. But 😆 I was not prepared for the changes. I assumed the anxiety and the fog is heightened because of the lack of sleep. As for my body, i have lost weight through exercise but all the weight now goes directly to my lower stomach. Which is comical. Sometimes you just need to laugh as you introduce yourself to the new you. My body temp has increased about 10 degrees but I have stopped the hot flashes through an OTC supplement (rhubarb).
71 degrees is now 96.
We are just getting by. We have to care about how we are managing this time because for many our caregiving roles are at their peak. (My Mother lives with us). One day it hit me. When you are young and starting puberty, it is so complicated. You need more sleep, your body changes, your mental and emotional self changes. Yet THIS time in our life is just as complicated in every aspect, our bodies are changing daily. Of course we feel like a lunatic, of course we cry over the smallest moments, of course we have strange hairs appear on our……..
Life is precious and we know this now. Hopefully many of us have supportive partners or friends. We need to be kind to ourselves. Calm seas ahead…. Again, thank you.
Tracy.
Awww man Jen thank you so much for this. I'm going through menopause as you talk about this. My baby is going out of control. I'm also finding myself at thos time. Thank you for all the info. Really appreciate it.
Thank you for just putting it out there that it's *literally* different for everyone. I'm 63, and am still flashing even after 18 years. Nobody talks about it - why is that?? Most doctors don't even consider menopause when treating us. Thanks again!
Thank you for sharing- it’s always nice to hear others going thru similar health/life experiences.
I am past this stage, but even post menopause has its challenges too. I really enjoyed this video. I saw so many parallels to my own journey. Thank you for doing this one.
I am soon to be 39, and I’ve had some really weird problems going on with my reproductive organs. I’ve been to my doctor twice now and all testing is coming out normal. My emotional state has been so strange, and I’m stressed out about it so often I can’t imagine it is helping whatever is wrong! Thank you for some strategies and sharing your journey in this way. I wish more women in my life would be open to speaking about these things.
Phew! Feel like I just had a heart-to-heart with a good friend. I was crying with you. Thanks so much for your honesty and openness. I relate to so much of what you're talking about, and I really appreciate hearing your perspective.
Thank you so much Elizabeth!! We are all in this together!
This video was honestly like a sit down chat with a good friend. Thank you for being so open, honest and casual with us. I shared tears with you as I feel 100% the same....I feel exactly like I did when I was 18, 21, 30, 40....I'm approaching 44 and don't know how it's happened so quickly. I enjoy your videos so much, as it's content that I can relate to. Thank you for being our friend!!
Thank you so much, Adele. That means a lot to me.❤️
Thanks so much for sharing your transparent personal self. Your comments and observations have helped me greatly.
This is hard. And it doesn’t help that there hasn’t been enough investment in the research of women’s health. And I agree with your thoughts on soul work. It is the work for the rest of our lives. When I came to the realization and that doing the work wouldn’t “fix” me, it changed my perspective in a profound way.
Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing. And yes - more of this, please! Be well, Jen!
I feel like you are talking about me. It is refreshing to have a peer say they feel the same things and validate that I am not just crazy.
Yes girl! A little louder for the people in the back. I have been listening to this video with my head constantly nodding 'yes' ! I know I am 'only' 39, but I do feel that my body is already preparing itself to shut the baby factory down LOL
Night sweats? CHECK! My goodness, the times I had to get up, change my PJ's and put a towel on my pillow and my side of the bed because it was just drenched .... I lost count. Now, that can also be caused by my medication perhaps, but I'm just trying to say that I know how that feels, my goodness, I know! And the first few times, I was embarrassed towards my husband for it. But he was so sweet about it.
And we are so hard on ourselves and I don't know why...well, no that's a lie, I do know why: this society, the media, the world we live in, push us towards being hard on ourselves, they push us to look 25 forever indeed. 'anti aging' bahaha :p
So with that in the back of my mind, I am trying to raise my daughter on a different path, a path where she can be who she wants to be. If she doesn't want to shave her armpits, well fine by me. She knows ppl might point, stare or laugh or make nasty comments about it, but she doesn't care. I couldn't be more proud of her. The only thing she doesn't like at the moment, she is 12 by the way(turns 13 on our debarkation day from the Wish next year ;-) ) are her boobs and her periods .... which I can totally understand. :-p
Thank you for this very candid video. It's very brave of you to share with us your experiences. Confronting your Dragons and addressing the issues that we face as we get older is very important and can't be swept under the rug if we are to be honest and want to enjoy our journey through life. There are no bandaids that can cover or heal these issues. Thank you for this so important conversation! ❤❤❤❤
I am going through the same thing but being a grandparent also magnifies some emotions....WORRY! Thanks for this video!
OMG I can only imagine, Kim!! Thank you for this!
Great information. I had a hysterectomy at 53 due to large fibroids that caused 24/7 HEAVY period for almost 2 years (talk about no fun!) I have struggled with weight gain and definitely found that eating keto (removing sugar and gluten) have a huge positive effect on reducing inflammation. Intermittent fasting has helped with weight control but it's still a struggle. I also believe that we deal with a lot of issues (like fibroids) due to bcp and I don't think there's enough research out there on how that effects us as we age and get into menopause. I don't deal with anxiety but I'm sure that just adds another layer to the problem. Thanks for talking about it!
Great video. Have always been curious and concerned about menopause. This topic is such a taboo in our part of the world that women who experience it, don't openly share their experience with even other women, which makes you even more scared and anxious. Thanks for sharing your experience so boldly. Proud of you.
I'm in the middle of watching this right now and it's so helpful, so much "yeah! That's me!". I was always anxious for the "normal stuff" but menopause sent me to a dark place of anxiety for a couple of years. You just mentioned the book about "I'm the same 12 yr old girl, the 24 yr old girl etc" and I so empathize with you and recognize that. We are still those little girls and young ladies. I want to read that book. Anyways... I'm rambling. Thank you for sharing this and I'm sure that I will enjoy/agree with the rest of it. I'm 59 and I've been postmenopausal for 7 years. It's been a strange time.
I don’t think I’ve ever needed one of your videos more.
Wow Lindsey I’m honored!
Thank you so much for doing this video. You will never know what it meant to me. God bless you. Please continue to make more videos on this subject
Thank you for this. It is so validating to know that I am not crazy. Please keep sharing!
Yes, Jen! I reached menopause menopause (not peri) earlier this year. It's a rough journey. You are correct, everyone is going to go through this differently, because everyone is built differently. What I can tell you that helped me was (and is) support from other women. My nutritionist, therapist, my GP, my OB all women within the sphere of menopause - so they get it. I'm part of a FB group of women who speak frankly (and bluntly, and crassly, and hilariously) about going through menopause. Whenever I'm in a group of women my age, I bring it up - and 100% of the time they are so happy we can't shut up about weight gain and night sweats. Having other gals to share it with isn't going to make it go away, but when the crying fits start because you can't fit in your underwear anymore, it really does help.
My mom has arthritis and she has found that bleach is a factor for her. Not just cleaning products in her environment but anything with bleached flour also. Enjoyed the video, thanks for sharing.
I’ve had moments of despair at how much has changed my brain fog has been so bad I just can’t remember things that my family have told me recently that really upsets them. My daughter was scared I was starting with dementia because it’s sooo different to how I used to be. I fear they think I don’t care any more at these times as I could always remember everything they told me they were going to be doing.
I’ve woken up today with extreme hip pains after a night of shattered sleep (broken doesn’t cover it).
My doctor says everything is menopause now & it upsets me because it means they don’t look into things like they used to.
I watched your video & I didn’t feel like I was alone in this. You made me feel it’s ok to catch up on sleep later too if I’ve had a night like last night, I felt I should be putting up & shutting up before. Thank you for sharing your personal journey so far, it’s not something that’s openly spoken about & my Mum passed away at 49 so I don’t have someone who has gone through it to chat to in my life. Seriously thank you don’t cover it enough. 🤗🤗🤗
Wow 👌 I am not in that part of my life yet but thank you for being so vulnerable. When you started tearing up, I immediately started to tear up. Also, random, but I noticed the sound on the past few videos of yours has been way lower than normal. I can turn my sound up higher on my tv (where I normally watch) but wanted to let you know!!!
By far, my favorite video Jen. I cannot thank you enough for being so vulnerable. I am 47 and am most definitely beginning perimenopaus. I for one would love more videos like this. Part of me wishes I could sit and have coffee with you as friends but this is the next best thing! Thank you.
thank you for your kind words and encouragement Tanya!
Menopause is such a big thing and so different for everyone. The emergency surgery I had the other week I told you about was my right ovary flipped and so they removed it. My left ovary flipped while we were doing infertility treatments but since we were trying they saved it this time they removed my right ovary. I asked if they were going to remove my left ovary too and they said no because then I would go through menopause and they assured me I did not want to do that at 32. When I told my cousin that she said menopause is great and the hairs on her leg have quit growing and she loved it. Pretty sure she might be the only one
Omg, this is 💯what I’m going through… anxiety, panic, intermittent fasting, “stupid” calorie restriction, sweating…. I just want to ignore menopause. Thanks for making me feel I’m not alone.
Hey Jen, A little late commenting and watching your video but thank you, thank you so much for this and just trying to explain what we are all going through and feeling. Perimenopause started for me at age 42 and now I’m just about to turn 58 and things have somewhat settled down but one thing is the extreme insomnia that also goes along with this. Some nights I feel lucky if I can just get a “nap” in rather than a full night of sleep. Download the audiobook looking forward to listening to what she has to say even just the preview really hit home. For sure keep doing these type of videos I think we all enjoy relating to your journey throughout your life thanks again, Terri
Thanks for talking about this Jen. As someone rapidly approaching menopause no one ever told me about anxiety, sleep problems, weight gainand the horrible monthly migraine!
Hi my name is Tammy. I am 57 and I am menopausal..well more like post menopausal, but who really knows! That intro seemed appropriate after watching your video this morning. I find this time of my life more freeing, yet more unsettled if that even makes sense. Thanks for sharing your journey.
I’m just a little older than you and have been struggling with peri menopause for the past 1-2 years, so I can completely relate to everything you’re going through!! I agree that we need to talk about menopause and normalize it. It’s not shameful, it’s something every woman will experience, although in different ways. I found the book, “The Menopause Manifesto” by Dr. Jen Gunter to be an awesome resource, and would recommend reading for any woman (or family member - my hubby has read some of it as well)!! Hang in there!!
I have been saving this video like I would hide and save a candy bar for a bad day. Thanks so much because I can relate and I really needed to hear it all.
Appreciate the video, Jen! I had a total hysterectomy just before I turned 50, went on HRT, and then caught a very early stage breast which requires hormone blocking meds. It is a roller coaster, for sure! I really miss my estrogen for many reasons, but am coming around to accepting this is where I am now.
Thank you for posting this and helping me to realize that I am not the only one facing these issues right now! I will be 49 in 2 weeks and in the midst of peri menopause. This spring, I watched my oldest son move 3 hours away. At the same exact time, my husband had an unexpected retirement! Coupled with worrying about my parents’ health decline, another son in college, and a learning-disabled daughter struggling through high school, I’ve had many sleepless nights! My own aging body issues add to the anxiety as well! I don’t have anyone to talk to so hearing another person’s perspective is refreshing!
Im 49. This year I started Perimenpause. Ive never had a decent cycle as when I was 17 I had an ovary remove. I went 5 months without a cycle then had a cycle in June and a double cycle in July. I had hotflashes and night sweats, and your right there is not a lot of info out there. I have seen my Dr im actually trying a blood pressure medication that is working really well. Ive also been seeing a nutritionist. Its defintely not a one size fits all process
Thanks for this! 43 with young kids (started a little later on). Suffered from anxiety my whole life and became MUCH worse after the birth of my first baby. No therapy really helped much. Zoloft (prescription SSRI) changed everything. I know it's not for everyone but for me it's helped so much. Never really understood a good night sleep until after I started the medication. Sending you hugs.
As someone in the perimenopause stage of life I am finding this so helpful. I’ve already started noticing some of these symptoms and while I’m not looking forward to more or worse symptoms it’s always more comforting than not knowing what to expect.
Thank you for being candid and sharing so much of yourself. You are not alone. We are all on this journey . . . together! God is so good. All the time. 🥰.
Hi Jen - so glad you did this video. I'm 70 and I didn't have anyone to help me through it, plus at the time I went through it all they had stopped HRT. MY Big warning to all women going through it - if you can afford it, get a scan for Osteoporosis. The insurance company's don't recommend until I think 65 or so and by then it is too late to do much. I was healthy ( for the most part ) did everything I thought would make it come out wonderful only to be told I had major Osteoporosis. I never cried so much in my life. Also if you feel comfortable doing it get HRT, I couldn't afford it and as I said in the early years it was taken away as an option and often insurance will not cover it. I could go on and on, but I do sympathize with you, I've gone through it all. Some of it gets better and some of it you learn to accept and move on. Glad I'm not the only over worrier around. If you ever need to talk ...
Thanks really helpful, Can truly understand going through the same phase of life ,it's very traumatic to deal with every symptom of menopause
God bless n thanks
Thank you for your openness! I'm 45, and have been in perimenopause for 2+ years. Anxiety, feelings of dread, physical pains, flushes, stomach troubles... textbook stuff. I have been working with a therapist and psychiatrist for 2 years. Like you said, finding an OBGYN that has any idea what to do with this is near impossible. PLEASE keep these videos coming... You're a blessing!
We get “the talk” when we are adolescents but no one addresses the much more difficult “puberty in reverse”. Doctors are not trained in menopausal management and we are often brushed off. I’m a wellness coach who IS post menopausal and I work with women in menopause. Thank you for making this video because, like you said, there are so many unique challenges in this time of life and it’s so important to talk about it.
Also, thank you thank you for mentioning our youth-obsessed culture, pressure to get botox, fillers, etc.
Most women on RUclips (at least in my experience) have had work done, and I can’t relate to them in a meaningful way.
I also have had to examine what I really believe about religion, spirituality, morality…and it’s changed. I am seeking again, and not in a church setting.
I’ve gotten honest and involved in recovery from lifelong codependency- which is NOT easy, but totally necessary if I am to thrive this second half of life.
Thanks again. Very much needed. 🌸
This was so helpful. I’m about a year and a half older than you and am going through everything you’ve mentioned. I’ve always been anxious and I am having a really hard time as of late, hearing you give voice to what I’m experiencing has helped me more than you can know.
I Am a fellow autoimmune perimenopausal woman that struggles with arthritis pain. What has helped me is I cut out oil and dairy out of my diet and my arthritis pain is totally gone. If I happen to eat something with oil in it, the pain in my feet, ankles, and hands does come back. I eventually went vegan because that is how I feel best. Thanks for sharing your story and I hope you find what works for you soon! Big hug!
SUCH WISDOM! This is why I try to read books, articles about other cultures that really value their elders. Thankfully was raised in a family that included this, at least to some degree. Have been thinking of my mother and grandmothers a lot through this. You are an elder, there is such power in that. Thanks…commented twice but you really got me with this one. Appreciate you…
Thanks for sharing Jen! I have Hashimotos and I had my thyroid removed in 2012 I was 48 yrs old. I hadn’t had my period for 1 year prior to my thyroid operation and 3 days after my operation I got my period, weird. I don’t recall but I think that was it for periods but definitely Hashimotos effected my menopause I’m sure. Post menopause is not fun either, anxiety etc. anxiety worse post menopause. 🤪
Jen, thank you for sharing!! I am 52 years old, going through this alone. Everything you are talking about I am there too. My (only child) adult son is the same age as your twins. He is looking at moving within the next few months. I just do not know how I am going to cope. I am experiencing the mind, body and soul issues too. I agree with everything you are saying. Hang in there and I do hope you share your journey with us. I hope you feel our love out here for you and I hope we can help you as much as you are helping us. I wish I could give you a hug. 💖💖
Totally get so many things you said! Hardest part for me is I think I’m still in my 20s and am wanting to do all the things but the body is not willing to cooperate. That’s ok. Im making adjustments and not giving in.. even if that means I’m just living my life in a different way! Thanks for all your positivity in all you do! ❤️
Thanks for sharing your journey - I found it very affirming and agreed with you on so many issues you touched on, e.g. so called anti-ageing industry is really insulting. I'm 63 and proud of it - many don't reach my age. It is a transformative time of life so you go girl!
Jen thank you for sharing this with us! I know I’m not there yet but as I near my 40’s seeing how my mindset has changed seeing how my body has changed and at times it’s so hard because I want to scream hello the 21 year old Anna is still here 😭! I’m still here even tho I’m different now in so many ways. This journey is hard and very emotional. 😭❤️
I’m 54 with Graves Disease (I’m now hypothyroid due to radioactive iodine). You are speaking my language.
Gosh, I remember when I was a teenager and my mom would have those hot flashes at night…I slept with a sweatshirt during summer 🙃. Not that it helps you right now, but it did not last for long for her. She had hysterectomy as well. She’s back to being cold all the time like usual
Jen, you do what works for you. Menopause was a difficult time for me but at 72 there’s peace and understanding on the other side! Much love❤️
It’s a very weird and emotional time. Please allow yourself to feel and know you will come out of this. It’s like growing pains - and it’s hard! Be really good and encouraging to yourself too! So glad you’ll be in your happy place very soon! Being in that environment will help! Praying for you!
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I am right there with you. The consent worry and the weight that just won't come off. Ugh!!! It is such a confusing time. Nothing makes sense. Things don't work the way they used to. Glad to know we are walking through this season together. On a happier note, I got to say hi to Liam at Disney this week!
You just described me.. I so feel you… thank you so so much for sharing…for me HRT was a game changer. My sleep is wonderful again and hot flashes gone. I still have some symptoms like fatigue but HRT was the best decision I ever made. Thank you again.
I fully expect this to be my next thing, Luna, and I'm hearing from so many women that have had good experiences!
Hrt has been a game changer for me to esp w sleep. I take my progesterone at night & feel like I've been drugged lol in a good way. I sleep so good. It was he'll getting my dr to put me on it tho. I knowbshe just wanted to be thorough but still. Great video
Lord I needed this. I was starting to wonder if I was going crazy; joint pain, anxiety (I've never had anxiety) heart racing, sleeplessness. I'm 48 so I'm in peri-menopause. Don't even get me started on the fact that my cycle skipped nine months and then returned 🤦🏽♀️😫
Jen, thank you for opening up the conversation about this. I am 39 and although I am not in this phase of life yet, I am experiencing some changes in my cycle. When I mentioned it to my doctor I was told to expect that. Now I am tracking each month so I can be armed with information and advocate for myself.
This video was great to hear that I’m not alone…I’m 66… and went through menopause at 52…so it’s been awhile for me…but you’re right on about the anxiety…
Jen what a great video 😲💕😊 I'm a person knocking on 60, it's so nice to hear I'm not alone and can so much relate to everything you are saying. Thanks for sharing 😊
Are you not through it yet I’m 45 and be terrified if it continued by 60 🙈 hope you ok x
I’m at the beginning of this stage and I’m so thankful you made this video. When you said you feel like your are running out of time that really hit home for me. I have been dealing with personal and professional changes recently and I just keep thinking I need to hurry up and figure everything out before I run out of time. I appreciate your honesty and openness.
I knew that you didn't seem like your usual self, Jen. It took a lot of courage for you to make this video and I appreciate you for doing it. I am well passed this stage of life at age 68, but because I had my child late at age 42, I can relate to what you said about your child having just moved away. My daughter moved out just 2 weeks ago. She has been away to college and lived away from home for about 4 years, but then she she came back and was with me from 2018 until now. I realize that this time the move is meant to be permanent and when it hit me, it hit hard. But I know it is time for her to be on her own and I am excited for her as she begins this next chapter in her life. I realized that my period of menopause took place late, while she was going through those anxious teen years, and because of that, I was not totally there for her the way she needed me to be. The guilt that I feel about that is temendous. There is nothing I can do to get that time back, but I can be here for her now for as long as possible, supporting her in every way and letting her know that I love her and that she can count on me. I wonder, myself, if I might still benefit from hormone therapy. Like you, my doctors did not know enough about menopause to give me any clear answers or remedies to address many of the issues that I faced. I do feel more centered and at peace now, though. My biggest issue at the moment is finding new purpose for my life now that I am retired (one year this past May!) and have an empty nest. I have always been a late bloomer. My daughter says I should start my own RUclips channel. I don't think I want to work that hard, but who knows? Thanks for sharing! Praying that you find peace and joy and contentment! 🥰
Roxanna I have absolutely been my usual self as these symptoms have been going on the entire time I’ve had my channel to one degree or another. If anything I’m more authentically myself because of the work I’m doing. Thanks for watching!
Thank you for sharing...and people don't really talk about it, and when they do they make light...like mocking the hotflashes. What courage and strength you have. There are things people didn't talk about about being pregnant, like how I literally had panic attacks about the cleanliness of our home and postpartum, how I felt like I was the worst mother in the world for the first month. It's like we only share the things that everyone experiences in the stages of being a woman and the rest of it we just feel like we are the only ones. Females are strong as hell to go through all these stages and deal with all the things. And you are inspiration, even in suffering. Hope you having an amazing trip, may your WISHes come true this week!
Thanks Carissa!!!!! And yea to all that you said!
You are such a beautiful person Jen, inside and out. This journey is still a few years away for me but I am so thankful that you are sharing your story. You are so right that no one talks about this stage of life. Sure people make jokes about the hot flashes, but it is clear that A- it is so not a joke and B- there is soooo much more to menopause than that. Hats off to you Jen as always for being a pioneer and talking about the hard stuff, because we can do hard things 💜💜 sending hugs and hope you enjoy your cruise!
Thank you, Jen. It is really nice and great that you share and talk about these things with us. You are older than me and I really do appreciate having your perspective in my life. It helps me reflect on and appreciate now as well as think about the future. Also, I hear you on the no fun diet stuff. I have gallstones and need to have my gallbladder removed, until that time though I have to maintain a low fat and low calorie diet and it is rough.
Yes! Please talk more! It is such an isolating feeling to not know if things are a "normal" part of menopause or something to be concerned about. I just can't run to my dr everytime something seems different because it is all different!
The bit about dealing with what is in your soul that you have been suppressing for years…that hit home so much for me and validated some of my recent choices. Thank you, Jen, for being vulnerable in order to help others know that they are not alone. I would love to hear more about your journey as you walk through this stage of your life.
Jennifer right there with you and I wish you courage on the journey! It's not easy but worth it!
The sleep disturbances was the biggest issue I had. It lasted for years. I am now starting to sleep better but I feel as though i have been sleep depraved for years ☹️