I've been meditating in this way for about six months. I like it - the smiling really helps but I've never had the warm feeling in my chest that you speak of, so I stay with a general feeling of goodness. Maybe one day there will be a warm feeling in the heart area,.
I am facing the same issue at the moment. I have tried to imagine the poor people in war who need help; the warm feeling may arise. However, it fades away very soon let's said 20~30 seconds, and after that, I can't feel/make "it" arise again easily, it is just gone. Therefore, I sit without a clear meditation object for about 30 minutes and just keep my attention to the chest area and using 6Rs while my attention moves to other place. So far, I thought that the seed of "loving kindness" in me is still very small, and I shall be compassionate to wait it grow.
@@rangamharsha i recently learned of TWIM a few months ago. I've been doing Goenka for 8 years now. Did a Goenka retreat in September and had a lot of confusion. Still quite confused and need guidance.
here is a question, probably one that is asked very often. I dont feel this warm feeling so easily and I am not sure if thats that or I am just feeling the sensations that already reside in the chest area. No memory that evokes that really comes to mind, a cute animal etc bring more of a head focused or smile sensation and even that after 3 seconds is seen as just sensation and not particularly positive or negative.
Yes its asked very often - Yep! So first sit for 2-3 minutes just doing nothing. Then smile for awhile. Then bring up the baby or anything that evokes the feeling. Just bathe in the feeling like you are happily doing a soak in a warm bubbly hot tub, Enjoy it. Don't 'try' but just feel the metta - Nothing to do -nowhere to go. Youmight not feel anything for 10-15 minutes! Just be patient and don't try to hard. Let it come to you. Smile all of the sitting and feel the smile. No goals, no trying-just doing.
You can send an email to info@dhammasukha.org - but complete the first part explained here. Try this for a few weeks. The next instructions are for after you have progressed through the lower stages of the meditation.
I am unable to sit for 30 minutes. I sit for 20 minutes and during that process of meditation, i send wish to myself and after that later stage, to my friend, spiritual friend.
Can my happy memory really be anything, like a song, a poem, painting, etc? What if I have no friends? Can I just love strangers or people I'm ready to forgive? A favorite tree even? Can they be a spiritual friend?
Please keep it to people you might like, had a cup of coffee with. They don't have to be perfect. No need to be a saint. Perhaps use the Dali Lama. He is a wonderful guy. Don't over think this.) To get it started you can think of a pet or dog or cat that made you smile.
What if nothing makes me happy? I honestly can't think of one thing. Remembering things that used to make me happy in the past fill me with only sadness and hatred.
Not to worry. Your comment is not that uncommon. Maybe focus on the feeling of lovingkindness - not necessarily happiness. They are related but not the same. Have you ever held a baby or a cat or dog - It can make you smile and feel good. That is what we are after. Just that. Don't make it a big deal. Just a smallest smile and loving feeling. Surely you can remember a time like that. HOWEVER some say no - so what is the answer then? It is Forgiveness meditation. The anger and sadness likely stem from disturbing situations that happened to you in the past. So what to do- Forgive them. Try some forgiveness - forgive everything that comes up in your mind for 7 days. It will change you. Here is a video with more: ruclips.net/video/bePv-F-c23I/видео.html
I am secretly mixing the technique with Vipassana and I see the results as well, I see kids smiling and saying hi to me, it's amazing feeling. My Question is, is it ok to mix with Vipassana, my teacher generally warns not to mix meditation techniques. I recognise my jaws clenched most of the time, kind of tension. Please answer. Thank you.
Please don't mix techniques. TWIM is a very specific "recipe" which must be followed very carefully for the best and quickest results. Yes you are trying way too hard and need to apply the relax step to your meditation as is spoken about in the anapanasati and the satipatthana sutta. Did you know that? No one talks about it but the basis of our 6Rs system is right there and the key to the attainment of jhanas and Nibbana. I would let go of Vipassana and try one of our online retreats for 10 days (free) and then decide how to go. wwww.dhammasukha.org
For a long time, I stubbornly tweaked the practice described in "The Path to Nibbana" according to my whims. But gradually, I did it more and more the way Bhante describes, and it worked better and better. I have changed my way of thinking. I think it makes sense to do a practice as suggested as wholeheartedly as possible to give it a chance to prove itself.
When you mix teachings and "secretly" do things and think you're wiser than a teacher that has decades of experience KNOW that you are corrupting no one but yourself. You then simply self sabotage yourself and your progress. Quite unwise.
Question: If in 2nd jhana (or higher), where directed thought and evaluation has ceased, how do you verbalize the 6 R's, to get rid of a hindrance? Or, do you do it through non-verbalizing the 6 R's?
Non verbal. Just DO the 6rs and don't repeat them. Just make the wish for kindness for your spiritual friend instead of say a phrase like "May you be happy just as I am" Just wish it and do it - don't verbalize.
Keep in mind this is just a method to develop your metta. You don't have to have the "perfect" friend. Just pick a friend that would have coffee or tea with and use them as your spiritual friend. If that doesn't work you could use a monk. Don't make this a big deal. Just a way to develop some friendlieness.😄
i think for men 'may i be happy, may i be at peace' works for them because they are encouraged to value self the most. for women, it's the opposite. it will not work in that order. 'may she/he/they be well' will work because we are actively encouraged to put ourselves aside for others. 'may i be well' will come last for us until we can actual sit in the centre of ourselves. much harder to attain. loving others first is easier for women.
Then use someone a little more distant from you. Dali Lama. Delson himself. A monk. Try at first with a pet or image of a baby and then to your self and then to a Friend. This doesn't need to be that perfect. Just someone you might share coffee or tea with.
Hello I have attained 6 th or maybe upto seventh jhana very lovely state any my awareness aromatically suck into head side in 4th jana but are there any advance practice after it or I have follow the same I have also attained compassion and joy state what next there kind of fear that I will die after it what to do should I continue 🙂
Yes of course. More to go. Please write me david@dhammasukha.org But also please watch this video for the whole path laid out: ruclips.net/video/3ekGfIFRRU0/видео.html&lc=UgzFgpn9LUztA42GKTV4AaABAg.9PmE9hyHXej9PmrQQE0CVN
Thank you for this guidance, it is helpful. Why does the spiritual friend need to be the same sex? Is it to avoid any romantic feeling? For people who are gay, does that guidance still hold? Thank you.
Yes - avoids lustful feeling. If that doesn't work for you then pick someone who is a friend but there is no lust there. But if lust arises you can simply 6R and not get involved also.
Classic Lovingkindness Instructions are to use same sex so as to prevent lust arising. If that doesn't work you then pick someone for whom no lust will arise. You can pick a monk or nun or respected friend. Important thing is to have pure lovingkindness.
Thank you for clarifying. I am a gay man and my best friend is a lesbian so we’re opposite sex but there’s no possibility of lust in either direction. I’m glad to know she can be my spiritual friend. 🙏🏻
Thank you for gifting us the clarity that tightness & tension is a form of craving!
How to visualise while sending wish and how much time to be with sams wish and visualisation?
What are the next steps once you start finding the loving kindness in the head? Is there a video on it?
I've been meditating in this way for about six months. I like it - the smiling really helps but I've never had the warm feeling in my chest that you speak of, so I stay with a general feeling of goodness. Maybe one day there will be a warm feeling in the heart area,.
check this site link - might help www.dhammasukha.org/cant-find-the-feeling
I am facing the same issue at the moment. I have tried to imagine the poor people in war who need help; the warm feeling may arise. However, it fades away very soon let's said 20~30 seconds, and after that, I can't feel/make "it" arise again easily, it is just gone. Therefore, I sit without a clear meditation object for about 30 minutes and just keep my attention to the chest area and using 6Rs while my attention moves to other place.
So far, I thought that the seed of "loving kindness" in me is still very small, and I shall be compassionate to wait it grow.
As soon as I wish the thought may I be well my heart.opens and get the feeling
It's amazing meditation. Iam following it last Nine months after failing in other meditation including vipassana
I have a few doubts... please share me your contact number
Did you do Goenka retreats?
@@Havasu1976
I am following Vipassana meditation ...sn Goenka tradition..
(11 years)....may I know how many years onwords ur practicing TWIM
Gopi..
Please share me your contact number...
@@rangamharsha i recently learned of TWIM a few months ago. I've been doing Goenka for 8 years now. Did a Goenka retreat in September and had a lot of confusion. Still quite confused and need guidance.
Very good explanation. Thank you.
here is a question, probably one that is asked very often. I dont feel this warm feeling so easily and I am not sure if thats that or I am just feeling the sensations that already reside in the chest area. No memory that evokes that really comes to mind, a cute animal etc bring more of a head focused or smile sensation and even that after 3 seconds is seen as just sensation and not particularly positive or negative.
Yes its asked very often - Yep! So first sit for 2-3 minutes just doing nothing. Then smile for awhile. Then bring up the baby or anything that evokes the feeling. Just bathe in the feeling like you are happily doing a soak in a warm bubbly hot tub, Enjoy it. Don't 'try' but just feel the metta - Nothing to do -nowhere to go. Youmight not feel anything for 10-15 minutes! Just be patient and don't try to hard. Let it come to you. Smile all of the sitting and feel the smile. No goals, no trying-just doing.
@@DhammasukhaOrg this is an amazingly specific answer, really appreciate it, thank you so much.
Thanks Delson 😊 metta!
Great video thanks for going into detail.
Great video, thanks! What is the next set of instructions?
You can send an email to info@dhammasukha.org - but complete the first part explained here. Try this for a few weeks. The next instructions are for after you have progressed through the lower stages of the meditation.
I am unable to sit for 30 minutes.
I sit for 20 minutes and during that process of meditation, i send wish to myself and after that later stage, to my friend, spiritual friend.
How to smile by eyes,mind and heart ?
Just feel the smile everywhere.
Can my happy memory really be anything, like a song, a poem, painting, etc? What if I have no friends? Can I just love strangers or people I'm ready to forgive? A favorite tree even? Can they be a spiritual friend?
Please keep it to people you might like, had a cup of coffee with. They don't have to be perfect. No need to be a saint. Perhaps use the Dali Lama. He is a wonderful guy. Don't over think this.) To get it started you can think of a pet or dog or cat that made you smile.
@DhammasukhaOrg That's a good suggestion! Thank you for letting me know
What if nothing makes me happy? I honestly can't think of one thing. Remembering things that used to make me happy in the past fill me with only sadness and hatred.
Not to worry. Your comment is not that uncommon. Maybe focus on the feeling of lovingkindness - not necessarily happiness. They are related but not the same. Have you ever held a baby or a cat or dog - It can make you smile and feel good. That is what we are after. Just that. Don't make it a big deal. Just a smallest smile and loving feeling. Surely you can remember a time like that. HOWEVER some say no - so what is the answer then? It is Forgiveness meditation. The anger and sadness likely stem from disturbing situations that happened to you in the past. So what to do- Forgive them. Try some forgiveness - forgive everything that comes up in your mind for 7 days. It will change you. Here is a video with more: ruclips.net/video/bePv-F-c23I/видео.html
Ajahn Brahm recommends thinking of a kitten or puppy, if I recall correctly. Maybe you could try that, if you like either of those animals.
I am secretly mixing the technique with Vipassana and I see the results as well, I see kids smiling and saying hi to me, it's amazing feeling. My Question is, is it ok to mix with Vipassana, my teacher generally warns not to mix meditation techniques. I recognise my jaws clenched most of the time, kind of tension. Please answer. Thank you.
Please don't mix techniques. TWIM is a very specific "recipe" which must be followed very carefully for the best and quickest results. Yes you are trying way too hard and need to apply the relax step to your meditation as is spoken about in the anapanasati and the satipatthana sutta. Did you know that? No one talks about it but the basis of our 6Rs system is right there and the key to the attainment of jhanas and Nibbana. I would let go of Vipassana and try one of our online retreats for 10 days (free) and then decide how to go. wwww.dhammasukha.org
@@DhammasukhaOrg can I practice TWIM after my Vipassana sitting, so that I'll not mix up techniques.
For a long time, I stubbornly tweaked the practice described in "The Path to Nibbana" according to my whims. But gradually, I did it more and more the way Bhante describes, and it worked better and better. I have changed my way of thinking. I think it makes sense to do a practice as suggested as wholeheartedly as possible to give it a chance to prove itself.
@@pbrninja19 Yes I agree with you. Just follow teachers instructions carefully. 🙏🙏🙏
When you mix teachings and "secretly" do things and think you're wiser than a teacher that has decades of experience KNOW that you are corrupting no one but yourself. You then simply self sabotage yourself and your progress. Quite unwise.
Question: If in 2nd jhana (or higher), where directed thought and evaluation has ceased, how do you verbalize the 6 R's, to get rid of a hindrance? Or, do you do it through non-verbalizing the 6 R's?
Non verbal. Just DO the 6rs and don't repeat them. Just make the wish for kindness for your spiritual friend instead of say a phrase like "May you be happy just as I am" Just wish it and do it - don't verbalize.
@@davidjohnson8218 Thank you. Just to be clear, I'm referring to internal verbalization, not aloud verbalization.
@@OldWolf9226 yes that is what I mean.
What if you don't have a spiritual friend?
Keep in mind this is just a method to develop your metta. You don't have to have the "perfect" friend. Just pick a friend that would have coffee or tea with and use them as your spiritual friend. If that doesn't work you could use a monk. Don't make this a big deal. Just a way to develop some friendlieness.😄
Is it okay if I make my mother my spiritual friend?
No- Don't make it part of your family. There can be issues that come up. Better to be someone outside your family.
i think for men 'may i be happy, may i be at peace' works for them because they are encouraged to value self the most. for women, it's the opposite. it will not work in that order. 'may she/he/they be well' will work because we are actively encouraged to put ourselves aside for others. 'may i be well' will come last for us until we can actual sit in the centre of ourselves. much harder to attain. loving others first is easier for women.
There is no friend that doesnt bring up resentment in me...
Then use someone a little more distant from you. Dali Lama. Delson himself. A monk. Try at first with a pet or image of a baby and then to your self and then to a Friend. This doesn't need to be that perfect. Just someone you might share coffee or tea with.
Hello I have attained 6 th or maybe upto seventh jhana very lovely state any my awareness aromatically suck into head side in 4th jana but are there any advance practice after it or I have follow the same I have also attained compassion and joy state what next there kind of fear that I will die after it what to do should I continue 🙂
Yes of course. More to go. Please write me david@dhammasukha.org But also please watch this video for the whole path laid out: ruclips.net/video/3ekGfIFRRU0/видео.html&lc=UgzFgpn9LUztA42GKTV4AaABAg.9PmE9hyHXej9PmrQQE0CVN
@@davidjohnson8218 thanks ❤️sir
🙏
Thank you for this guidance, it is helpful. Why does the spiritual friend need to be the same sex? Is it to avoid any romantic feeling? For people who are gay, does that guidance still hold? Thank you.
Yes - avoids lustful feeling. If that doesn't work for you then pick someone who is a friend but there is no lust there. But if lust arises you can simply 6R and not get involved also.
Can your spiritual friend be a living pet?
You can use your pet to get started and bring up the feeling and get that going along with smiling. THEN move to a spiritual friend.
Why is the requirement for the same sex in your meditation?
Classic Lovingkindness Instructions are to use same sex so as to prevent lust arising. If that doesn't work you then pick someone for whom no lust will arise. You can pick a monk or nun or respected friend. Important thing is to have pure lovingkindness.
Thank you for clarifying. I am a gay man and my best friend is a lesbian so we’re opposite sex but there’s no possibility of lust in either direction. I’m glad to know she can be my spiritual friend. 🙏🏻
First step for me is to find a friend in real life before doing this meditation then...