EMDR: the weirdest therapy I've ever had
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- Опубликовано: 15 апр 2022
- After experiencing EMDR therapy, I knew I had to do a video about my experiences, because it's a very weird, very effective sort of therapy. EMDR is typically used to treat PTSD and trauma but is increasingly being used for other mental health issues.
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I am a retired Clinical Social Worker who was trained in EMDR about 30 years ago by the woman who discovered the process, (Francine Shapiro). She told the story of walking in a park and noticing disturbing thoughts coming up and then subsiding. She began to pay attention and realized her eyes were scanning back and forth. She went on to develop the process and tested it on traumatized vets from the Vietnam war. It proved highly successful. When I was trained there was no light bar, we used our hand and fingers much as Sam did in the video. Students brought in small traumas from their life, nothing major or serious. I identified three incidents. All were resolved and a few days later I could not even recall what one of the three was.
Later I was in therapy for a childhood trauma and my therapist used EMDR on me. I also experienced the dislocation after the session and usually the following day. I learned not to make big plans for the day after the session. I also noticed spontaneous changes in behaviors after the sessions. I would find myself acting and reacting to situation in a completely new way without conscious effort. Each time it was a spontaneous and correct action for the situation.
Thank you for presenting this to your subscribers and to people with ASD. It may be one of the weirdest therapies out there but it is very effective.
Since you have an international audience I will note that all of this took place about 1990 in Denver, Colorado USA.
Thank you for sharing this interesting story.
Would you post a video reading this narrative you wrote here please? And expand on any thoughts that would be helpful? It would be great to hear from you since you trained with the dear one, Francine, who discovered and developed EMDR.
That is so interesting that you trained with Francine Shapiro. ❤
I had EMDR treatment and it did change my life. I had CPTSD and as I got older the impact of that was making it so difficult to socialise as well as terrible body pain. I am also autistic, but the CPTSD just became too hard and I really wished to die. This EMDR treatment literally saved me. I’m much happier as it desensitised me , the flashbacks don’t happen now, I feel at peace now, and I feel emotionally safer. I did really go through hell though as everything had to be opened up, all my past childhood had to be confronted so I felt as if I was walking around with an open wound which was scary. I’m glad it’s over, but it was worth it to live in peace now.
Hi. I found your comment interesting. I’m cptsd. Childhood abuse/trauma. Maternal/family. A psychiatrist told me emdr wouldn’t be effective for me. As it is for individual event trauma. PTSD. Specifically. When I research it though I come across stories similar to yours. Who had cptsd and found the treatment to be helpful or even a total success. So I am really confused. Lost. I’m 51. Feel like time is my enemy. Sorry to bother. Just so frikn confused. 🙏bless. Thank you for sharing
@@akala-bluesaville9866 hi, I had quite severe cptsd and required several emdr sessions dealing with them all individually. I live without being triggered now which has changed my life considerably. I highly recommend it. 💚
Hi, I’m 24 and got diagnosed with cptsd, I’ve been on emdr for over a year now, it’s hard to go through but I would totally recomend it, cause life will get way easier with less trauma on it. Its scary at first but a lot of the time the reason we’re afraid to take active action in recovery is our own brain protecting itself because of the trauma. If you feel like you have a safe space with your therapist even if you go through tough times in the therapy you will feel safe and it will be ok. I wish you luck. :)
@@akala-bluesaville9866 It really works. Even a faint picture or a feeling is enough as a starting point. Current trigger situations work as well, since the feeling is the same. Also did a year and it changed my life. I started because of a problem with my dentist and the abuse cptsd with my mother unfurled. In the end i made peace with both my parents. Its a miracle.
You are not alone.
I do my own eye exercises at home that I learned off YT. Highly effective. No need for the memories, just be aware of how your body feels. It’s changed my life
I’ve done EMDR off and on since 2015. It changed my life! Helped me overcome loads of unresolved trauma and experiences over time that I didn’t realize were impacting my daily life years later. Also helped me overcome my active alcoholism (sober 7 years this September 💕). I had more frequent sessions in those earlier days of treatment, but even recently I had a session with my current therapist simply to process through some stress and anxiety I’ve felt because of my job that was triggering previous negative cognitions I thought I’d effectively worked through. I like that there’s no wrong way to be in those sessions, even if I hit a wall and feel a nothingness, there’s still information in that feeling. Really appreciate this video today :) thank you!
Congrats on your 7 years of sobriety!!! 🎉 That’s quite an achievement!
Wow, I had a GERD baby. I’ve said early parenthood has given me ptsd. People think I’m joking, but this was really validating. Thank you.
I totally thought EMDR sounded corny and pointless. Like ten seconds in, I was shaking and crying uncontrollably. This therapy is REAL.
I’m doing online EMDR! I’ve had one session so far to work on childhood trauma (oof). My therapist uses a website that has a ball that you follow with your eyes. It was very interesting to me how my memories are connected and how my childhood trauma memories are connected to my son (after his birth is when the trauma came out). I also experience a few days of very vivid memories/emotions/reactivity. I was supposed to do EMDR a week later but I asked my therapist to wait because I felt like my brain was very “sore” if that makes sense.
We’ve also used EMDR to “install” tools in my brain. For example, I have a box installed where I store unpleasant things, like sounds, etc. I can’t explain it, but I feel like there is an actual physical box in a corner in my brain! And it’s so helpful! I can go to crowded places and put people voices in the box so that I can enjoy and not being overwhelmed by stimuli! It’s amazing!
If you wouldn't mind could you elaborate on the "tool" bit and how you did that? :o sensory issues and especially noises are my biggest problem/trigger right now and I just can't not completely focus on them 😭 people tell me to ignore them or try to focus on something else or imagine like a barrier between me and the sounds but I have no idea how to do any of that
@@LordKiwii so, while doing the eye movements, my therapy guided me to visualize a box in my mind in as much detail as could. In this box, I will put all things that cause me a disturbance (a physical feeling in my chest, for example). She called this process “installing” the box. So now I can rapidly access this box and put whatever is making me uncomfortable in it. I think the eye movements enforced the image in my mind so it actually feels like a physical compartment in my brain, if that makes sense
@@AurorasWindow What is the website?
EMDR is really exhausting I feel you there. It's also a so crazy to walk out and be like, huh, that was only like as bad as a flashback but now I don't have to got through a flashback about it again once a week for the rest of my life👍
Anyway. Hugs and Bugs❤🐜 hope you're doing well.
@TheBioaurora please can you share the EMDR website you used? Thank you.
I've had one EMDR session so far. What it felt like was that memories that for me felt extremely real (they felt like I was there with all the feelings and emotions - think of the pensieve in Harry Potter) they started to feel less present, more like other general memories, less sensorial or emotional. That was my one and only experience so far.
And I have to thank @YoSamdySam for it, as because of another video of hers I've heard of EMDR, looked it up and insist on it with my therapist.
PS: remember each brain is different, so it might or not work for other people
i had an extremely successful experience with ketamine-assisted hypnosis that saved my life. I think EMDR and hypnosis has some overlap. I think anything that kind of helps the body act on something else other than the trauma when you think of it helps it not go into fight or flight, and therefore let those memories through without blocking the system.
Can I ask where you are located?
This is actually so interesting. My husband and I almost died in a car accident, and during my recovery from it one thing that REALLY helped me was watching lots of ASMR optometrist videos or physical exam videos with bilateral exercises for the eyes. They also helped me a lot in physiotherapy. Listening to your story, I wonder if I was accidentally seeking something like this therapy.
I can't tell you how much this video and all these comments have helped. I'm 35, in and out of therapy since I was a teen. I've talked and talked and talked and the only relief is having someone to talk to. We always reach a point in therapy where they don't know how to help me and I hate to admit it but I steadily lost hope over time. Ive sort of accepted my life has been a series of traumas and now there's a pile of them and that's just who I am , this anxious and frequently depressed person who can't manage any kind of relationship. Honestly I could cry right now...
Hi Angela, I know that feeling, all talked out. I now dabble with Havenning on YT with Paul McKenna and EFT with Brad Yates. All free and effective. Best wishes.
Ohhh what you say sounds different from my story but has some similar qualities. I'm close to your age, and I feel like I'm just starting to get some embers of hope. I had stopped believing that things could be any better. I remember the day when I thought - for the first time in years - I see a future. My heart goes out to you and I hope you get what you need! Maybe it's EMDR (though I will mention that it took me a lot more sessions (and money) than it took yo samdy sam). Maybe you can find something really based in the body (speaking of... have you read the body keeps the score? could be a triggering book, but has so much hope in it! healing through theatre, through parts work in therapy, through EMDR of course).
Also, modern society is lacking in real community, and one thing that really helped me when I was feeling alone and really not sure how to maintain friendships, was I signed up for a yoga teacher training. This one was spread out over 9 months, and had the most wonderful community of people, and I think this was a really supportive thing while I was trying to heal, to experience belonging to somewhere again. Of course, that costs money, but if you can find one that seems to suit you and you have the money, that could be a wonderful thing. I don't teach yoga, but I know for sure that I'm doing the poses correctly when I go to a class...... and I've made friends who I'm still friends with today!
" the only relief is having someone to talk to " - that's how therapy has always felt for me! Which in turn made (makes) me think I just don't truly have any issues, or else I would find benefit in therapy. At the same time though I don't know if/what traumas I have (imposter syndrome also plays into this "it's not that bad others have it so much worse etc").... It's hard!!
This is such a touching comment and parts are so resonant - I'm 30 and have always inexplicably struggled with my mental health. I feel like I've earned myself a degree with how many different modalities, from psychological to spiritual, I've researched and attempted to implement. My level of struggle would make more sense if I had big T trauma, but it seems I'm a HSP with a small collection of little t's. I've also been in and out of talk therapy since I was a teen and I'm coming up to a year of a mixture of talk therapy and somatic work for chronic pain (which I'm certain is emotional in its cause), and whilst my life and relationships have improved on paper, my inner state is much the same. It seems like everyone else eventually reaches a point of resolution, or finally hits on the right treatment for them, but that doesn't seem to have happened for me and I'm not sure where else to turn. Although, EMDR does intrigue me and is something I'm willing to try.
Honey it will all work out bc it sounds like you want it too. Wanting to heal is half the battle. Your only in your 30's, which I personally thought were the toughest times, I'm 46 & still in therapy. Currently doing EMDR. It's very helpful but I still have a bit of a journey myself... just make sure the psychologist you chose is FULLY TRAINED IN ALL LEVELS OF EMDR. IF NOT COMPLETELY TRAINED THEY CSN CAUSE MORE DAMAGE THAN GOOD. Sending you strength 🙏@@francesprendergast1721 Honey. HHoney H.
I am autistic and had EMDR to cope with my support animal's rather graphic death. Took 3 or 4 sessions to go from off the scale levels of distress to about a 3, I might want a top up at some point but he flashbacks and screaming grief even after years were finally dealt with and in the great scheme of things so much more gently than other therapies.
Highly recommend
This is quite literally the MOST relatable thing I have ever seen on RUclips! Our first baby had that exact same "colic"/reflux issue from 5 weeks to 5 months of age, and I absolutely have diagnosed PTSD from it! Baby #3 is now 7 months and even though baby #2 & 3 were much happier, every time a baby cries I can feel my adrenaline spike and have that sense of dread and lack of control. Baby #1 is now a healthy 6 year old(!), and while I thankfully left the full-blown panic attacks complete with sensory flashbacks behind several years ago, I am still affected (both emotionally, and I suspect also with slight hearing damage). I have never heard of anyone else acknowledging this as a trauma (except my own therapist), but my husband and I know that to be a FACT, whether anyone else fully understands and takes it seriously or not. I know people with non-colicky babies often can't understand, but it truly is a form of psychological torture to listen to your baby scream in pain for hours on end and the there is absolutely nothing you can do about it. It would violate the Geneva Conventions to intentionally put someone through that. So I really, deeply appreciate you taking time to share this story and very glad you've found something that can help. ❤️
no, i understand. i have autism. i CAN'T stand crying babies. Makes me want to do things harmful to myself. It can absolutely ruin my day. I'm glad that you're doing slightly better now. Have a nice day
Yeah, EMDR fundamentally could not work because of my presentation of autism. They require you to pick an untrue negative belief that you have acquired because of your trauma that feels true but it is not (which is why the way they present it doesn't involve the word 'untrue') but I didn't have any because I am too technical about how I see everything, even emotions. My therapist ended up needing to go to the flash technique of EMDR. Unfortunately, I had to cut therapy with her due to insurance in the worse before better phase and we spent 3 years and brought in a lot of consultants for standard EMDR but it was simply not possible due to the fundamental lack of a core belief about my trauma that was unhelpful or untrue and the challenges with bilateral stimulation and autism. I am currently undergoing prolonged exposure therapy. I have some concerns about it but I have a feeling it might either make my symptoms WAY worse or WAY better. Even hearing it described made me tear up. The flash technique of EMDR did work better on the trauma than standard EMDR but I got sleep paralysis from it at first. I'm still working on trauma. Hoping for improvement soon.
Wishing you all the best on your healing journey!
@@YoSamdySam thank you and always wishing you my best too. I love your content.
I also struggle when my therapist phrases things like "untrue"/"false belief", as they feel real to me. I think I will actually make it clear to her that I take things literally and if she says to focus in "untrue" feelings I can't access them because they are true.
Good luck with your therapy.
PS: sleep paralysis sucks 😞
@@klassikbrasil oh mine didn't phrase it like that but the fact was that all my core beliefs on my trauma actually have the nuance to them such that they actually are true. Like I don't have any belief that doesn't have exceptions to them and I don't have beliefs that generalize to any situation beyond my trauma.
@@klassikbrasil good luck to you too
I’m having EMDR for CPTSD. It is a more difficult and definitely longer process than EMDR for PTSD (singular event).
So happy EMDR worked for you! I once saw a video on a therapist who did trauma therapy to a baby after a traumatic medical incident. There the mother told the baby the positivity sandwich story. I can‘t remember, if the therapist did EMDR, but she kind of worked with tensions in the baby‘s body. It was quite fascinating and it‘s so great to have trauma therapy for so tiny humans.
I’m going to cry. So happy for this little one
I'll be starting EMDR for cptsd next month. I have constant double vision so I am relieved to know many types of bilateral Stim work. I was diagnosed as autistic
last year,age 59.
My therapist had me close my eyes and hold the buzzers. Another option is beeps in your ears, I think.
@@theoldaccountthatiusedtous6767 My therapist has me cross my arms across my chest (think an Egyptian mummy) and tap my shoulders alternately.
I used to work with someone who raved about this, and it just sounded fake (and he was into some weird stuff), but I read about it and it got my interest so this was really good to hear from your perspective (this guy was also one of the first to say to my face he thought I was autistic)
It definitely sounds/feels like a pseudoscience thing! But it's not! It's really weird haha
@@YoSamdySam I'm lucky enough to have made it onto the local shortlist for extra support for adult-diagnosed autistic people, and this is of the things I'm hoping to be able to ask about
I've had a relatively good experience with EMDR. Ideally I would have done it for longer, so I'll probably do it again in the future. One of the things I found difficult was I found it really funny and would laugh! I was aware of feelings about an event changing while doing the bilateral movements. I found it funny because I was also thinking "this seems like it shouldn't work but it is"! Once I managed to settle back down and resume the therapy I found it more helpful.
Experiencing your feelings changing at the time is very strange. Glad it helped you!
I also laughed on mine... "What is this witchcraft!"
I also laughed. It was funny, stupid and so much relief. To see jumping monkeys instead of that what stressed you out?
You can also do emdr by yourself it you can’t manage humans. There’s guides on RUclips but because it’s seems to work by the mechanics of eye movement it’s still as effective. Just saying cuz nhs is poop and strangers are terrible
The eye movement is too much for me but I use the buzzy things but tapping can work as well. My brother uses tapping in their EMDR. I use the buzzy things in mine. I do EMDR every week for Cptsd.
Could you give us a specific recommendation that you found helpful? It would be of great help❤️
For those of you who also don’t like to talk to strangers 😊, I’ve listed several options to release trauma. I’ve worked with many, just to see what works for me.
Binaural Beats have a similar effect to EMDR when you think about an event, or have a physical stress response similar to your trauma response while listening 🎧. It’s not just the eye movement, clicking sounds that stimulate the amygdalae in alternated rhythm or binaural beats / binaural music with 🎧 have the same effect. There’s relaxing music as well as special subjects.
Guided hypnosis for trauma has helped me, Marisa Peer has several on RUclips. The Healing Vortex is one of them.
EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), tapping acupressure points, can also be used to relief anxiety & heal trauma with online guided scripts.
Vagus Nerve exercises reset the nervous system. They are easy to learn and to apply when you need a quick reset during the day.
TRE exercises help the body release traumatic stress without talking or thinking about it, even pre-verbal experiences.
All are available on RUclips. 🙏🏼🌺
Managing humans... Well put.
Not recommended to be done without a therapist
To me 20 min. EMDR=10-20 hours of talk therapy as far as healing. I get bad side effects exhaustion and headaches, but still do it whenever talk therapy uncovers a new little trauma I've got to work through, because it's just so fast easy to get to the healing. I do it with my online therapist, which involves scribbling a lot. I agree it's so weird it doesn't look like it would work but it does.
I have watched several videos explaining personal experiences with EMDR therapy and all, not some, but all have centered around an experience, recent experience, relatively speaking, and how it, the therapy, was successful. I experienced my trauma many years ago when I was in my 1st relationship, love, etc....and we were walking home from our local pub. Suddenly, a man jumped out from someplace which I cannot remember, shot me in the face and then shot my partner through the head. I am still here, as either a punishment or a gift, I am never sure as I relive those moments so often.....I am still here but PJ died in my arms 8 minutes post shooting and the man was never found (whole other story). I was stuck where I was, as the local police asked me not to go home in case they needed me, for nearly 6 months. Initially, it was OK as I had a support system but then that system began to move off, away and I was left alone until, finally, the police told me I cold leave. Indeed, a friend who was out with us that night and almost pleaded with us to let him drive us home that night, which we kindly refused as it was only 3 blocks...felt to guilty for letting us walk that he, who had a history of depression and anxiety, committed suicide. This further added to my survivor's guilt and feeling of being alone. When I was allowed to go, I was mandated into therapy by the state, as they were paying my salary for as long as I needed, in thanks to a Victims of Violent Crime, program....so I remained in therapy..for years from week 1. Thank God for it. They tried ECT....2 rounds of shock therapy, each with 10 episodes, so 20 in total..and it didn't work to extract certain memories from my psyche. As time went on, though I went back to work within 6 weeks of returning home, and I was trying to fake a brave face, things were getting worse until I finally had a complete breakdown 18 months later. Thankfully, my job was kept for me in the 2 month clinic stay I went through (1st round of ECT that did nothing but make me think of Olivia De Havilland in "The Snake Pit" and her character's experience with ECT in a whole new light..and made me some friends whom I remain friends with, today...but were there for alcohol and drug related issues. After 8 years of faking it, and doing a second round of ECT, I began experiencing colitis and had to go on disability as the medication they gave me, and I still take, is opium based so I couldn't work..and we tried dozens of medications. Anyway, my trauma turned into traumas...and they kept growing though I was still able to function and still do, but for medication reasons, and those days they don't work, my life is much changed. I didn't go out, socially, for so many years and some years ago, went to our ancestral home in Italy, where I am and where, per a huge coincidence, I met the man I am married to, today. Our relationship is unique but many are....and he is a prof in chemistry at a local university and a thesis student of his is going through this type of therapy, now, for something she experienced during lockdown. He wants me to look into it so that is what I am doing. I am not sure what my life would be like if my mind was rewired to deal with the many years of depression, anxiety, PTSD, nightmares, etc....and that frightens me. Also don't know if it would be advise for someone who's been living with the PTSD for decades. I will continue, though, seeking answers and I thank you for sharing your story.. So many people are so secretive about anything to do with mental health when we need to be more open about it so that the stigma is removed. I've found this for myself in speaking to schools and churches about my experiences. Thank you, again. Cheers! - Gary
Everybody has ideas about babies that cry for hours every day. My son kept me up so long and often that I would catch myself falling asleep while holding him. Nobody knows what the hell the problem is. Everybody questions what YOU are doing wrong as a parent. It was definitely traumatic for both of us.
When I first learned about EMDR was when hypnosis finally made sense scientifically to me as a legitimate thing. I’ve been wanting EMDR for a couple years, but I’d prefer to do it in person, and I live in the US where there’s absolutely no care for immunocompromised people re: covid. Even just watching RUclips EMDR/bilateral stimulation videos has helped me a lot before.
I think describing it from going from distressing to sad is about right, it describes my experience at least. It sort of puts it aside into a story in the past, rather than being present and gripped in the body.
I find with sessions I'm totally zoned out after and need to just sit and stare into space for a while. With mine as well as the desensitisation there was quite a big emphasis on the reprocessing - so as well as the visualisation of the worst memories it was also thinking about what my inner story was about myself and the world in association with the memory (usually quite negative), and then thinking about what narrative might be better. I do it myself now - but I did a lot of learning to feel comfortable and safe doing that, with the main thing being having really good tools to regulate if emotions get flooded (or shut down) and being safe and supported for if things get stirred up. I find eye movements uncomfortable so I use bilateral sounds alongside tapping.
The other thing I've been trying and finding interesting is Trauma Release Exercises. They seem to work well for me as my tendency in stress response is to freeze and hold a lot of tension in my body. It has less supporting evidence than EMDR I think, but for myself at least it feels potentially beneficial and sort of resets and relaxes everything. It may be even weirder than EMDR!
I'm curious about TRE, never tried it but you just reminded me of it.
I was lucky enough to consistently have the day of therapy off work, so I'd go to therapy, then I'd maybe journal a bit, then go for a walk, then maybe have a nap. Walking and sleeping are bilateral stimulation. I allowed myself to sleep as much as I wanted.
I had EMDR therapy last year - perhaps 4-5 sessions. I don't have a specific instance of trauma like you; mine is more of a C-PTSD situation. My therapist had me first picture a calm, safe place that I could retreat too if the memories became to intense. Then, she had me cross my arms over my chest and alternate tapping against my chest for bilateral stimulation. One by one, over a few weeks, we went over the various prolonged experiences that were causing distress.
I do feel that it helped; I can revisit these memories now with a clearer view, which helps me actually begin to learn from them. Interestingly, she said that the way I responded to the prompts was what made her begin to believe that I was autistic (after I had brought it up multiple times prior). Did they mention anything to you about responding differently due to being neurodivergent?
I quit after two sessions because I was literally cured … and also cuz I didn’t like going outside for appointments lol
I've done some EMDR, as well, and I totally get how you were thinking it was BS. I legit thought it was super hokey when my therapist suggested it, and even after it has helped me process so much trauma and many of my traumatic memories have sort of lost their power, I still think of EMDR and am like, this feels like such a weird and nonsensical treatment, lol, but it does seems to really work.
This is the first time I’ve understood what emdr is, thank you.
Your early baby story sounds just like what I went through with my now 18 year old daughter. If people were to ask what the first five months were like with her, the only word I can describe was "hell". She was diagnosed with silent reflux, but only after finally getting a phone call to the paediatrician crying saying I couldn't cope with her crying any longer, she was not sleeping, I wasn't sleeping, my poor son was traumitised by her consistant crying. To this day I still cannot cope with crying babies. I did 2 EDMR sessions about 2 years ago to help with PTSD caused by surgery gone wrong. And I can attest as simple as what it is, it actually works. Although I still suffer from PTSD, I have learnt some strategies to help cope when I have to face medical procedures.
Oh my, now I want to try EMDR even more than before... I wish I could! Sadly, in my country EMDR is basically non-existent and not covered at all. I heard it's super hard to go through, especially with complex trauma, but that it's worth it and that it has really potential to help compared to therapies like CBT... I swear all my country has is CBT. I've spent years and years in CBT / talk therapy and it didn't do a single positive thing. At first it felt good to tell someone about the trauma, but then it... didn't really solve anything + it gets tiring & re-triggering(!) to constantly having to explain what happened over and over without any solution. Sometimes it made things even worse when the therapists reaction was something along the lines of "it could be worse, [insert random example of trauma] could happen to you on top of it" or something similar that basically puts you into more depression. That's really when I realized - hey, sometimes no therapy is better than random/bad therapy, I shouldn't be even more depressed day before and day after therapy and have no positive feelings nor relief about the experience, etc. I'm from Europe too and it really baffles me to see how it works in different countries, I wish we were on a level of Netherlands or Germany... I know there's no perfect place with perfect healthcare and there's always some struggle, but it all looks so much better than what we have where I live. Thank you so much for this video and overall the content you're creating. :)
Omg! CBT is emiotionally abusive and ridiculous in my experience!! I'm the US which has a corporate healthcare for profit system run by big pharma! The book "Sickening"
@@dee5331 I believe the huge problem with CBT is that meanwhile it can be incredibly helpful for some people, it's abusive and harmful for others. Always one of these, nothing in between. I think we need some way how to sort people into "could benefit from CBT" and "definitely not CBT", but the sad part is that nobody cares and everyone things CBT is the golden standard that should help everyone. My partner is the one who could potentially benefit from CBT and DBT techniques since he's autistic with BPD and his main issue are his core beliefs that affect how he feels then, when he analyzes his thoughts and beliefs and comes to conclusion that they're not true, he's actually relieved, because his beliefs and thoughts are like "everyone must hate me" (even though people love him), "I'm not good enough" (even though he is), etc. For me on the other hand, CBT doesn't work... because CBT really works with the idea that the patient basically has every aspect of their life in their own hands, that their issues are only in their head, that anything can be changed when you "try enough" & that you shouldn't suffer if you don't have any cognitive distortions. Which is untrue for many of us.
the situation in the netherlands is not that great either. there are super long waiting lists for trauma therapy bc it's so underfunded. i'm literally typing this on the train to amsterdam where i'm going to a protest about it.
@@ldekker97 I hope the protest goes well! I totally get that it's not perfect, as I wrote I know that every country has it's issues in healthcare..., but I honestly wish there would be at least some EMDR therapists - even with long wait lists. Because when there's basically nothing, I can't even wait for anything... For example I waited about 2,5 years for an autism testing. It definitely does suck and it needs to change. It caused me a lot of issues (I lost tons of things due to lack of help and it impacts me to this day). But it was definitely better than no testing. I kept going because I was looking forward to the testing and that things are going to get better once I get there. But with the therapy... I realistically know I can't expect anything here, I'm not waiting for anything...
I'm glad it worked so well for you and all the commentors on here. I tried EMDR when I was in the hospital. And honestly had zero results. There was no change or shift what so ever.
Thinking about it now. It may well have something to do with me having Strabismus (wandering eyes) as getting both eyes to focus at the same time is difficult to impossible depending on how tired or anxious I am.
The worst sound in the world, is a crying baby. My kids are 21 and 14 YEARS old, and… I STILL can’t stand the sound
As a parent in the states who had a “colic” baby and no support, thank you. I had no idea you could get EDMR for things such as that.
My EMDR therapy lasted a lot longer than that, mainly because I had a lot of different traumas to get through and a lot of it was C-PTSD rather than just PTSD, which made it a bit more complicated to untangle. My therapist held up two fingers and asked me to follow them with my eyes while focusing on the negative experience, but I couldn't do both at the same time, so instead she asked me just to focus on the negative experience with my eyes closed, and she tapped the top of my knees in quick alternance for a while instead, and that worked. When Covid happened and we had to stay 6ft apart, she suggested I do the tapping, and that also worked.
Oh my god. I was a silent reflux baby. I also choked on my own vomit and couldn't breathe twice. The first time was during the day and my mother noticed immediately and picked me up. My parents were dismissed at the hospital and sent home without a diagnosis or any help. The second time was a few weeks later at night and I was without air for a longer time. My mother woke up because it was so quiet because she was used to my constant crying. She went to check on me to find me purple-faced and not breathing. This time the hospital took it seriously and I was diagnosed with reflux, given medication and got to stay at the hospital for a day while my parents went home. My mother is a very abusive person, she has a lot of deep issues but I'm sure this didn't help. Crazy thing is this was also at a Dutch hospital. I'm glad that you had a much better experience with the medical system in this instance than me and my parents did. It's good to see that 25 years later there is more awareness of how having a silent reflux baby impacts the parents.
Approaches that are about getting you to be fine with what happened as opposed to making it better piss me off and feel like a hostile scam.
This brings to mind that I am both heartbroken and thankful that my life has not gone in a way which allowed me to have children. With my own health being the multiple chronic illnesses mess it is, on top of being autistic, I can see no way whatsoever that I could have coped with having a child who was chronically ill.
Oh, forgot to include that several years back, before the world recently changed, my Psychologist tried EMDR with me. Yes, it helped. Thought I don't see or know how it works I have experienced that it works. Which is good enough for me.
Thank you! This was VERY interesting. FYI; you should look into EMDR for your daughter when she is old enough to go through it. I was adopted and have trauma that reoccurs whenever I am in any way abandoned again. Even though babies (until about 2) do not make permanent memories, the memory will still be in her Amygdala in the form of feelings that can be triggered again. (Say when something else causes her to cry or experience pain.) Best wishes💕💕
Even though babies may not make memories before the age of two, body trauma is often stored nevertheless. Releasing body trauma doesn’t need a memory with TRE (Trauma Release Exercises) 🙏🏼
The title of this video got my attention because I have explained my EMDR experiences as "the weirdest experience" as well! Very positive, very beneficial, but holy wow it felt so foreign and bizarre the first couple of times. And then the effects of the therapy that continue after a session. Dreams, memory recall, and other things. I feel like it gave back several years of my life and confidence.
Thank you. It takes courage to be vulnerable and share your experiences for the benefit of others. You do great work. Keep it up 👍
I had my first EMDR today and my first comment post to therapist was “this is the weirdest thing I have ever done” but bloody amazing I can’t wait for more!
EMDR was developed by Francine Shapiro (psychologist) in the 70's. I researched it when I started it over a year ago . it kind of worked for me but the psychologist I was seeing was not very good at it. I am searching for another EMDR psych atm.
You know I'm really glad you're posting videos again. I'm an autistic mother myself and I don't really have anyone I can talk to so you're videos help me with that. I feel like I have someone who's going through the same thing with me and if you can make it through I can make it through. So we'll make it through together and I'll be here for the next video!
*waves in autistic mama*
Oh wow! When you said screaming baby, I immediately thought: silent reflux. Our first baby was like that from day 1. She screamed every 1-1.5 hours for a bottle. She was diagnosed with silent reflux around 2 months of age (she's 15 now). Those were ROUGH times. I remember lying in bed thinking about leaving her at the fire station. A lot. My husband and I had PTSD for YEARS. I wish we had access to EMDR back then. I first learned of it in The Body Keeps the Score.
My daughter had that! It was awful! It was an occupational therapist who figured it out. I'm an autistic only parent, I had no help, or therapy. I'm so glad for you that you have support!
So great to hear someone talk about this! I had EMDR a few years ago and it felt a bit like magic. You notice it works, but you don't have a clue why. I had the lights and headphones with sounds and it worked really well. I remember my therapist getting the buzzers as a new gadget and when she tried them with me I threw them on the table when she put them on 😅 She was laughing so hard, cause all her other patients liked them very much, while she herself had the same reaction as I did.
I've heard of EMDR therapy but have never tried it. Thanks for sharing your family's experiences. I'm definitely intrigued! 🤔
I had EMDR a few years back for childhood trauma, and I believe it worked for me. The trauma memory is still there, but it no longer triggers me. I had about 6 sessions of this. And I also felt very vulnerable and emotional during the process and a few weeks after. I would do it again and recommend it to others.
I had a great experience watching a training video for therapists. Watching the video actually gave me a healing result.
Very helpful & informative thank you. It also gave me compassion for myself, my baby was 2 months prem and suffered reflux... it does get better, funnily enough it improved a bit after fleeing my husband once i realised he was a sabotaging narcissistic psychopath. Babies reveal what was there all along, fully awake now! 🙏
I tried EMDR, for bullying trauma in elementary school, but it wasn’t doing anything for me. It didn’t make the trauma better or worse. It just didn’t do anything and it’s hard to tell what exactly went wrong. I remember really struggling to access tangible enough memories to work on. Because to me it wasn’t the actions that distressed me, but more so how that fake friend betrayed my trust by gaslighting me. It made me lose trust in average neurotypical people my age once and for all. It doesn’t really help that I had to quit early, because of other trauma I was going trough at the time and EMDR being quite intense. The irony is that the other trauma was far more traumatic than the bullying.
I’m autistic and having EMDR at the moment. The therapy plan is basically an A4 size of stuff that’s been really traumatic and needs addressing. The first trauma image took 3 sessions and the second trauma took 1 session. My childhood trauma is taking longer as there is a ton of later traumas that have overlaid themselves within the same neural network and it’s taking a while to unpick as sometimes I get a flood of different flashbacks at the same time. I couldn’t cope with the eye movements so I’m just using the hand buzzers or leg tapping if we’ve had to do it online. I leg tap if I’m triggering with something between sessions as it’s helping me to work through it a bit quicker and then I can regulate my emotions quicker. The whole opening up of processing channels seems to be having an overlap into other areas not related to what we’re working on either. Like I’m noticing more quickly when I’m getting sensory or information overload (I would not have even noticed before) and so I’m able to manage my autistic symptoms much better too. EMDR does feel bloody miraculous though and I’m telling everyone I know about it
I struggle to find the things that actually do cause the endless anxiety within me. Because my body is so overstimulated by multiple traumas over my entire life.
I tried EMDR for the first time 5 years ago after my third was born. The therapist held up her finger and moved it back and forth for my eyes to follow. I used the buzzy things but switched to me just tapping my knees. My therapist said I was processing super fast. But each time I felt so frustrated because I'd start to shutdown.
My second therapist, after my 4th baby. did the finger movement and me tapping my knees. Again if feel a sense of shutdown.
Others have told me how they have had amazing results. I want to experience it as well. I think EMDR makes me uncomfortable but I do want to give it another try.
I'm glad you have a positive experience. It's others positive experiences that make me want to keep trying it.
Really interesting video, thanks! I've been debating trying it to help finally move past the experience of acute Covid, which then led into two years (and counting) of long Covid. (Or, acute trauma, followed by looonnng trauma.) It's nice to hear that you've had success with it even though, similar to me, you're still in a situation that could be triggering those same feelings on a daily basis, rather than addressing something with the benefit of distance.
I was treated with TFT many years ago, and it worked wonders! In just one session…! If I have understood it right, EMDR is quite similar to TFT? Cool that we’re finally starting to recognize more untraditional methods for helping people with trauma etc.
TFT combines all sorts of techniques while EMDR is solely bilateral stimulation. I prefer EMDR as it is simple and really effective. TFT uses specific “codes” for each issue which gets quite cumbersome.
@@taoist32 Ah, I see! I thought TFT was easy to use, I quickly learned the technique. However if things can be made even easier- sign me up lol 😂
EMDR changed my life, too! I also thought it was weird & fake. It worked for my PTSD & I was quite surprised......not to mention beyond thankful! Decades of pain, gone. Decades of mental health issues, gone. Decades of intermittent talk therapy, over & done. Anyone hesitant to try it should just go ahead if your mental health provider recommends it. There's no downside & it just might change your life, too. 😊
Emdr worked so well that it actually scared me 🤣
I’m so happy to hear that!
"It's the bit where she cries" awww hahaha, that is so precious! Dude, I am so sorry life has been so tough for your family. I'm feeling stressed and anxious just imagining dealing with all that. Yikes. Hope things get easier and easier every day. Thanks for making this video, I've been very curious about EMDR but also it seems like quack pseudoscience stuff AND I'm not sure that I have such specific "images" I can produce... anyway this was great, thanks again!
It took a while (2 yrs) before we got to do the actual bilateral stimulation, but we did good therapeutic work during that time (EMDR is just one of the tools she has up her sleeve). Then when I actually experienced EMDR, I could tell how powerful it is, and I could see why she waited until I was ready.
I heard somewhere that they think EMDR could work in a similar way that processing happens while you sleep. I always write down my dreams, so sometimes this helps me - I make the weirdest connections in dreams, and never have to rate any of my feelings on a scale from 0-10. (actually, rating the level of distress is supposed to be part of EMDR, but my therapist stopped asking me because I just... couldn't. it still worked wonderfully.)
Wow, the Dutch healthcare system sounds great! (Speaking from the perspective of living in the United States which is a healthcare wasteland unless you are wealthy.) It sounds like this treatment should just be available to folks who may need it, which is a lot of people. I wish we could have systems here established where the physical AND mental health care of everyone is covered.
Sounds like the not knowing was going on and people not listening could be traumatic as well
That sounds incredibly awesome of the Dutch healthcare system. I had one baby and we had no issues like colic, but I can imagine the screams as you described... I am so sorry. Nobody should ever diminish what you've been through, that sounds horrific. Hearing a baby cry is one thing, but hearing your own baby cry after giving birth... just absolutely.... so much. Especially with sensory issues from autism. I absolutely would consider it PTSD. I'm going to give this EMDR therapy a try, I think. Thank you for your video. I hope all is well now after it all. I cannot imagine how hard that must have been.
Thank you SO much for recognising during the description that not all of us can form images in our minds! I'm so desperately sorry for the reason you had to find out how effective this technique would be for you, but my word the healthcare system there sounds absolutely amazing.
It didn’t do anything for me but I think it’s because I most probably have adhd. My thoughts were racing like crazy, instead of focusing on one event it felt like I am rewinding a tape with a recording of my whole life… 😅
You're not alone, but for me I think it's a problem with c-ptsd. Mine has gotten extremely better in the past few months by understanding my attachment style and finally seeing I'm not the crazy person my ex made me out to be. He was literally gaslighting me on purpose. Recognizing that has helped. I'm not sitting here flipping through my memories like it's my personal cartoon flipbook horror story style. There's still loads to uncover but at least my mind doesn't race like that anymore.
I really enjoyed hearing your experience and appreciated all the information you shared about the actual appointment! Lovely how your son was so engaged with the therapy and even wanted to go back haha! great to see your family getting the relief and help they deserve. especially the little one with reflux! poor thing. sending love to you all xx
Thanks for sharing, Sam ❤️ I have a few friends with children that have also had a rough start due to reflux, and also from them I've noticed it's very impactful on the whole family. All the best to you and your family!
And thanks for posting this video! I haven't had any experience with EMDR yet, but your video inspired me to look into it. From my therapist I've understood EMDR can also help with low self image and deep-set negative convictions about yourself that are limiting ones thought process. I'm struggling with those quite a bit and it's so hard to shake it off by just cognitive therapy. And, now I think of it, EMDR might just give that extra push to help myself make better life choices that help me in the long term..
You're an inspiration, Sam! Keep up the good work ❤️
I'm so glad you and your family had access to this help and are starting to feel better. You also really give me hope cause (I'm one of those ppl that are like omg I'm so much like samdysam) but yeah, you make me feel like ok I can do this. I'm hoping to start a family but, definitely nervous with me and my partner both being autistic-adhd.
Also, a few years ago before I knew I was autistic, I was a respite worker for an autistic woman and she had a period of almost constant meltdowns. So kind of like with your baby it was inconsolable. I didn't know what to do to help her and unfortunately they really do not provide enough training and awareness around what was happening. They probably don't even know 🙄. But ultimately it was traumatic for me as well as for her and I had similar responses to how you describe with the bebe. Now that I've realized myself and learned SO much I just feel so sad that I didn't have that knowledge before. It's like damn! The crap people go through especially when they have limited communication. Kinda went off a tangent but all that's to say... I think I totally get where you're coming from and I do think people with screaming babies deserve the treatment. I'm sure it helps save marriages and keeps families more sane. Thank you for sharing!! Much appreciated.
I just had emdr for the first time today so I thought I would do some research on it and i came across your video - it's super helpful and interesting. I then heard you reference dutch healthcare and found out from your website your just done the road from me I think, I'm in Haarlem but from England originally. Also my second child had silent reflux but I struggled for ages after, trauma really does make sense now. Thanks so much for sharing 😊
My teenage son had EMDR about age 13 , he didn't get it, tried a few session and couldn't grasp it. Just after that he was a lso referred for Autism. Now he's nearly 16 , we are still in the process of Autism pathway to the point they'll be discusing evidence soon. However, listening to this made me realise why he didn't get it, his Autistic brain... he's not creative and can't really visualise, he also dosent often understand his own feelings around events, or should I say can't explain the whys. Now I realise putting the 2 together why it didn't work for him back then. This was really useful in helping me understand why. Thank you for putting this video out there. Not getting "how" to do the EMDR can go in his reports as more proof to how his brain works differently. ❤
Love and compassion to you and your family. The Dutch healthcare system sounds amazing!
Thanks a lot for your channel, it helped me figuring out what's "wrong" with me, i'm still not sure but I can relate a lot on what you're saying
I am really considering it! My psychiatrist supports it :) I'm so glad to hear it worked for you. ❤❤
I'm so sorry for your experience, i know how hard and stressfull it can be. But how great, that there have been professionals that have been so caring -and gave the advice to try EMDR! (Typicall for the netherlands?) I have had an EMDR -"session" long time ago, but the therapist did not use light but her finger, which she moved in front of my eyes from left to right and back for several times. I don' t remember weird feelings after this, but i have had a trigger who constantly made me panic- and this did not happen anymore after the EMDR- Therapy, so it was very helpfull.
That reminds me of another therapy, that worked with the body(--movement), and that helped in a very deep way ( if you are interested, see: Peter A. Levine:" In an Unspoken Voice. How the Body Releases Trauma and restores Goodness" and :" Healing Trauma. A Pioneering Programm for Restoring the wisdom of your Body")You can do it from home, with the programm in the book! It is very helpful in cases of long lasting traumatisations and in my case, it helped me to feel normal for the first time in my life after my childhood!
And by the way: I'm glad to see you a bit "recovered", i already missed your vlog😊!
Don't know, what happend to the text, it should not be striked out!
@@kind_of_willow3193 You might've put a short dash ( - ) at the beginning and ending word of that section, which act as -strikethrough- tags on YT. If you keep the dash from actually touching the letters, that won't happen.
@PLThank you for your explanation. I really do that very often😁
Definitely need to try that. Nothing else worked, so might as well. Cool video. Thanks for sharing.
I am so happy to see you again on video, and to know you found an emdr practitioner and some relief.
I did it on and off for two years and the difficult parts for me were (1) to follow the movements with my eyes since I rely heavily on visual memory to reconnect with the traumatic bits, and (2) to identify what was going on in my body and with my emotions since at the time I didn’t know I have alexithymia.
So I did better closing my eyes and being gently tapped on my knees or hands.
I agree it is so weird and yet so effective. Such an amazing therapy.
Anyway, my therapist recommended to be careful to repeat the movements on my own (with a specific speed and cadence) since there was the risk to re-experience specific bad memories without proper supervision. Sorry if my english isn’t good enough to explain this better, but I think it’s better to be cautious and to do not try emdr without proper guidance, especially when childhood trauma is involved.
This is amazing. Thank you so much for such a detailed description of how it all works, I’m gonna take the idea of EMDR to my therapist as soon as I can to see if I’m in a place where I can do it right now. I have CPTSD after 20 years of living in an abusive household, so this is, if you can believe it, making me really excited. I’m hopeful that this will help.
Thanks, Sam! My psychiatrist had mentioned EMDR, but I didn't really understand it, so this was very helpful. (One of the character traits that makes me think I may be autistic is that it is very hard for me to do something if I don't really understand the purpose of what it is I'm doing...I'm having that problem trying to do CBT with my therapist.) One of the things that is making me think of trying EMDR is that it appears to address physiological aspects of trauma, and I'm not sure that CBT does...it feels like it's all cortically driven, "good thoughts/bad thoughts". And I am now quite certain that a lot of my trouble stems from a central nervous system whose homeostasis skews heavily to the sympathetic side. I'm becoming aware of how much my homeostatic balance colors a given thought: the sympathetic side thinks it's a disaster, and the parasympathetic side is comfortably philosophical with it ("yeah, it's a bit of a drag, but stuff happens and that's okay"). So I can have a very different reaction to the same thought, depending on who's in charge. I wonder if any of the bilateral transfer is related to that?
Glad you are doing better! I got anxious just hearing about what happened with you and your family. I've considered PTSD as a root issue for my current state, but one problem has been that, in the states at least, PTSD seems to be heavily focused on a single, probably life-threatening event, like what happened to you at university. I lack that, but recent circumstances have some things in common with what you have just been through...very high (I hate to use the word "intolerable") levels of stressors for an extended period. So I am reconsidering PTSD as maybe being plausible component of my current situation.
Thank you for sharing your experience! I'm doing online EMDR therapy for CPTSD, and as others have mentioned, it seems to take longer and be a bit more complicated than in the case of a single traumatic incident. My version of bilateral stimulation is my arms crossed over my chest and gently tapping my hands on my chest. My therapist guides me to speed up or slow down depending on how I'm reacting to the treatment. It's definitely a slog, especially considering I've been doing it almost every week now for almost two years, but it has helped so much, and gives me a lot of hope for the future. It truly is so weird - it sounds like snake oil but there's a lot of research supporting it, not to mention personal experience.
Reminds me of Havening, which can be surprisely good for Trauma and a few other things. Recall the issue, stroking of shoulders, face, hands (all can be done on yourself, if touch/trust an issue).
There's also some similarities of NLP in the qualifying, almost surprised they didn't use a future question?
I use headphones that play a soft beep in alternating ears! I pair that with the hand buzzers, but I don't use the light bar because it's too distracting and I can't hold the image in my brain. My therapist has me identify the image, feeling, body sensation, and negative belief that are associated with the event, and also a positive belief that I would like to have instead (e.g. replace "I can't handle this" with "I am capable"). We do the rounds until the image transforms to something less distressing and then check in on the distress level and belief. This has been a miracle for me, though out of the 6 or so things I've tried to process two have been "unsuccessful" because in one I got stuck on an image and it didn't go anywhere and the other my dissociative disorder kicked into gear and derailed it. For people like me who have CPTSD plus a dissociative disorder I recommend doing it in person if you can simply because I feel safer knowing that someone is physically present to support me if my brain goes weird. But if you have a trusted support present at home that could work too!
glad you're back after so long!
For me, I got home and realized a couple of lynchpins that were involved in the trauma and had a massive cry where I cried so hard I broke tons of capillaries all around both eyes. Best cry ever.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience.
You seem more animated than on other videos. A friend loved this therapy. Other people have reported it's too overwhelming and nauseating. My therapy is a slow approach as I get so intensely triggered.
I’m a weaver and don’t have access to EMDR so I’ve been doing a homemade version of this as I weave.
I had a PTSD diagnosis (together with chronic adjustment disorder - which I now think was my autistic reaction to having my life turned upside down overnight. Didn't know I was autistic at that point though) and the treatment was EMDR. It took a few sessions before I even felt comfortable attending - I had a full blown panic attack in the waiting room before my first session - and it included some talking therapy before and after the light show. My experience of it was similar to Sam's except that my psychologist would interrupt a few times, to ask simply what was I thinking or feeling. She didn't let me talk much though so that I wouldn't 'stop processing' as she put it and I was always instructed to return to the image of trauma. I had 12 sessions before I felt the real benefit, followed up by a few talking sessions. The result was incredibly good and I was able to completely stop the antidepressants within 6 months of stopping the EMDR. I guess the way it works depends on each individual case and also the psychologist's style? I'd say if you are ever offered EMDR, grab the opportunity with both hands. I have friends with complex PTSD diagnoses who have also benefitted a lot from the lights.
EMDR was quite of a mixed result for me. When I was young (around eight years old) some f**ed up dude spied on me at the pool and followed me home. Then, at night, he tried to use a ladder to climb into my room. I was so lucky that my father saw it (he was in the room under mine, so he saw a ladder through the window and went outside with a kitchen knife xD). I heard noises outside and went down and just quickly saw the man in question (who was working at the pool I used to go) while my sister explained the situation to me. At that moment I didnt quite undersand, the man had fled and the cops never found him. But, curiously, I was suddenly very affraid of windows at night. I simply could not sleep without my shutter tightly closed and I kept looking at my windows with anxiety. I was 20 when finally EMDR cured this trauma and for that it worked like a charm. One session and I could even open my windows in summer ! It simply chased away that image that my young brain had created of that man face looking at me through the window, even if remembering it still feels extremly disturbing. However, despite 2 full years of therapy, my therapist could not cure the trauma of being harassed in school, maybe because it was a very VERY long trauma (from 4 years old to 20, every year, almost every school/uni day). So yeah, it was astoundingly effective for this one time extremly traumatizing thing, but for this long term neverending story, it did not work quite as well
I did this a long time ago with little vibrating globes that flashed green lights inside. It helped me with the trauma of a suicide attempt my father did in front of me when I was 13. I got in a place of empathy for my dad and stopped viewing myself as the victim.
I've recently qualified as a Clinical EFT Tapping Practitioner and we use elements of EMDR. The information provided within my course is that EMDR imitates the eye movements of REM sleep which are a natural way for our body and mind to 'figure things out' and/or complete the trauma cycle. EFT and EMDR have both proven to have positive and long-term benefits in war veterans - better than CBT! ❤ I will be adding EMDR to my repertoire as soon as I can! Love these amazing tools!
People like myself really underestimate trauma. Even the smallest and strangest things can throw you into such a constant traumatic/fear response that can ruin your life. Im a truck driver and had a strange thing ruin my life. I choked on my own saliva when swallowing and for some reason it processed that as extremely dangerous or even a near death situation even though its something I've typically overcame and moved on from as most people do and the fact that this has practically paralyzed me and made me terrified of swallowing and constantly defensive and on edge for so long is insane but learning about how the brain works lead me to try emdr. I really hope it works. Definitely a bit scary to face but when you hit rock bottom emotionally the only way out is through.
Dont ever underestimate the power of your mind. Literally any experience, silly or not, can become trauma and ruin your whole life when not processed the right way. It is so important to take care of our mental health!
Fascinating. Apparently, alternating sides is an important part of this bilateral stimulation, so the brain's thoughts cross back and forth from one side to the other. Just fascinating.
I just found this channel, my s/o has autism and they like this channel too. So I subscribed for them but this therapy is something I'm trying to get for myself. So this content is useful even for me who doesn't have autism and (to my knowledge) isn't neuro divergent.
I have had a good experience with using EMDR for trauma. But my sensory sensitivities, tendency to take questions very literally, and difficulties pretending made it challenging at first. Luckily I have a therapist who is very experienced with it and was great at making adjustments based on my needs- adjustments she said she has now used successfully with other patients on the autism spectrum. I did it virtually, which I didn't expect to work well, but it did and was maybe even more effective for me because I was able to be in the comfort of my own space and wasn't distracted by every object, sound and temperature shift in her office. I've done mostly remote work with her, so this may not be as much of an issue for those who've had predominantly in-person sessions.
For me things like having my back against a wall for stability, having my therapist augment certain questions to be more specific and less open to misinterpretation or confusion, wearing very comfortable clothes and prepping my space beforehand so there were no outside sensory distractions (I had a noise machine on and the curtains drawn, for instance) made all the difference.
I've only done it a couple of times so far because of how intense it was, and can corroborate that there are aftershocks in the days following that people should be prepared for. They were not as bad, however, as those I've gotten when discussing traumatic events in therapy- I could still work and communicate reasonably well.
I wouldn't recommend doing self-administered EMDR, as it appears via a quick youtube video search a number of people are doing, but this video is a good example of what my therapist used in our virtual session ruclips.net/video/pR1qShUsHc0/видео.html
I found accommodations like that in my sessions were very helpful as well! I struggled with the verbiage my therapist used after the stimulation of “what do you notice?” Like what does that mean? How am I supposed to respond to that? What if I didn’t noticed anything or had a jingle from a commercial from the 90’s in my head? So, once I realized where my disconnect was, or pinpointed whatever my discomfort was, we were able to adjust and change it up. Also love the options of stimuli - I’ve used vibrating/pulsing nodes, eye tracking laser pointer on a wall, recorded videos, and even a feather pen waved back and forth :) I think most therapists are happy to be creative and work with us through these, I’m glad you found one to help you feel comfortable and get something out of it!
tank you for this
My therapist (psychologist) has suggested EMDR for my bullying as a child.. only thing is there is no specific one bullying memory for. Lots of different ones that slowly ruined my self confidence, so am wondering whether this will be prodctive for me?
Oh my gosh, here in England they would have sent you an orde of social workers to blame you for everything that didn’t happen, and give you more trauma.
I have always been very interested in EMDR. In the past, before my diagnoses, before I KNEW about trauma, autism, adhd, I tried it, but I got so hung up on WHAT I was supposed to be picturing or thinking. I needed more literal instructions, or to know it could be some general thought or whatever. I think the therapist thought I was being defiant. I didn't have BIG T traumas, so I couldn't picture what I should be.... picturing... this is helping me to understand how I might be able to approach it now. I think I could generalize say, the misphonia episodes, and the general feeling of being mistreated by certain people over and over. It doesn't have to be each individual incident, right, it can be like "HOw I feel when this person continually crosses my boundaries."
Additionally, I have misphonia, so the crying, wow. I mean, for sure, the sound, the relentlessness, the feelings of helplessness, because you cannot communicate with a baby, "Hey baby, why are you screaming and what can I do to help?" And of course loving your baby and not wanting them to be in any pain or misery at all let alone to the extent of hours of crying.
I think the hand buzzers must be extra useful because we also tend to have some issues feeling, literally, our bodies, or whatever, so having that extra stimulation might be very useful.
The body awareness is hard. Lately I have begun using Peter Levine's exercises which I found here on the 'Tube, to feel my body and to finally understand what NTs mean by "grounding."
"Hamster psychologists, you can keep them in your room."
EMDR actually backfired with me and ended in a suicide attempt. I hadn't been diagnosed with ASD at the time.
CBT helped a lot, as did MDMA assisted therapy.
Thank you for sharing! I've been avoiding making my appointment (go figure) the online wiki definition seemed a little vague, or maybe too simple to be true.