Is Alicent Hightower a bad mom?
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- Опубликовано: 5 июл 2024
- Here's to hoping she doesn't do something crazy after this lol.
I have watched all of HOTD 3 times in the last 4 weeks and I found that I had a lot to say. I know she isn't perfect, but she deserves more than the cards she was dealt.
Shout out to my brother Colin for editing the script for this video, you a real one.
Follow me on ig: mad.westie
#houseofthedragon #rhaenyra #alicent
I think she tries but she clearly has favourites. Her treatment of Aegon before he goes off to Rook's Rest was awful and I felt really bad for Aegon tbh. Alicent clearly loves Helaena very deeply and seems to be alright with Aemond
She tells Rhaneyra "You know what Aemond is". She is aware that her son is a monster. But unlike Aegon, he doesn't embarrass her so she tolerates Aemond.
It's easy to love Helaena when she is so nice. But I highly doubt she had much effect on how Helaena became so nice, still we se heer looking bored while spending some time with Helaena
I think two things can be true at once, a chracter can have a tragic backstory/plot that has partly made them who they are while also having personal flaws at the same time. Cersei has a tragic backstory but is also a bad person at the same time. I agree that it is the shows point that its not a moral failing exactly that alicent is a bad mom tho.
Of course she would be a "bad mom", she was a pretty much a child herself when she had kids.
I agree partially but Alicent is not really like Cersei. Cersei chooses to the play the game and acts in her best interest, Alicent did not choose and does not act in her best interest. Cersei was undermined by her father, but she also had a lot of power of her own. I think I want to do a video about Cersei because I really do despise her, but I also think she is such an interesting character!
@maddsvlogs yeah I agree that alicent isn't like cersei at all, alicent was definitely forced to try to do the civil war. I was making a example of characters like that, probably should of made that more clear.
@@jaredmccain7555 it’s all good! I understand what you’re saying :)
Alicent would have done better to actually parent Aegon. She kept telling Aegon he needs to be King, but instead of teaching him to be King, she let him run around doing whatever he wanted. Instead of teaching him dignity and restraint, she just quietly cleaned up his messes.
She knew that he was a grapist and a drunk, and she never tried to curb those vices. She just gave out moon tea and hush money.
“Yes”
TLDR: where did she learn to be a parent? Same with Rhaenyra. Neither of them know how to be mothers, and it shows.
Rhaenyra at least has the love of her kids. That’s not a good thing. Her kids love her because she’s also immature. Vizzy T was a bad king and his daughter would be a terrible queen.
Honestly I’m team small folk. Targs are evil.
That’s the most interesting aspect. None of them are good rulers. Alicent and Rhaenyra are bad rulers. Otto is okay but his plots resulted in catastrophe for him.
@@misanthropicservitorofmars2116 how is Rhaenyra a bad leader?
She runs off without letting her council know.
She doesn't name a hand for like 5 episodes.
She sneaks into KL!!!!
She demands respect without earning it.
In the span of a month she has alienated Daemon her strongest ally, got Rhaenys killed, got Sir Darklyn killed, is distancing her son who is arguably the smartest in the room, insulting the men who are trying to help her all while crying that the big bad men won't follow her blindly.
You can't say it isn't fair to compare Alicent and Rhaenyra, because that is what the show is doing. They are meant to be compared. They are two sides of the same coin. Parallels. We are supposed to see it that way. But!! That doesn't mean we cannot contrast as well. We should compare AND contrast, and so I really do like what you're doing here.
That all said, Visarys should've been there for his entire family. Both daughter and wife, and all of his children and grandchildren. They should've all been loved equally and taught to be a tight family. That said, he shouldn't have let Alicent name Aegon "Aegon" or even Visarys. No previous King names. Just name him Vaegon or Daegon or something and the other names are fine. Furthermore, he should've abdicated the throne to Rhaenyra in his last, very ill days. That would've done a great deal to help her to be recognized as Queen. But then the story wouldn't be so good and dragons wouldn't have all but died out. 🤷♀️
@@Ash.Crow.Goddess I LOVE the way you put that!! I feel like people are comparing and not contrasting and that’s exactly why I framed this video in this way!
I think the problem with VizzyT is that he never really got over what he did to Aemma and could never love Alicent that way and Rhaenyra is the reminder to him of what he did because he mentions that she’s looks like HER (in the show of course).
i agree with u fully. I came this comment section to say this exactly. But I couldn't organize my words as beautifully as you did.
I agree that Alicent was made of circumstances and we cannot truly blame her for being not affectionate with her children. I have no doubt she loves them, but she struggles to properly show her love. BUT. She is adult and responsible now for her actions. She could chose different path for their children than what her father chose for her, simply by using rule "I was unhappy with my unbringing and I will do everything my children would not go the same path". I am sad you touched so briefly Alicent being violent with her Aegon - it is especially well seen during Eye for Eye situation, when she literally slaps him, when he was completely innocent in this situation. We don't see her abusing Aemond, but Aegon clearly is abused. He also feels unloved by her ("I try so hard but it will never be enough for you or father", "Do you love me?"). Alicent abusing Aegon sent his message "being violent is okay" and now he applies violence - towards Dyana in private and towards Kingdom on mass scale. Yes, we are talking about world where corporal punishment is okay, but even in such world it should not be applied innocent people and Aegon was innocent 13-year-old in that moment, but his mother publically violated his space and humiliated him.
Alicent also basically gave her permission to abuse Helaena by marrying her to Aegon. While Alicent might have had her reasons to not marry her to Jace, there was no need to marry her to Aegon. (If she wanted stregth line, she could chose Aemond or Daeron. It's not like Aegon himself was excited for Helaena being his wife.) She knew what person her eldest is, and she knew how it feels to be married without being given real choice. It was not Viserys who arranged this marriage - SHE did this. She married her daughter to man who "mostly ignores her except sometimes when he is drunk" and we can only imagine what things Aegon does to Helaena "when he is drunk". Yes, lot of Alicent's flaws are effects of abuse she had suffer, and we absolutely should have compassione towards her, as well understanding why she is how she is. But bad things happenieng to her do not excuse her abusing her children - she was not controlled by anyone in her parenting and she still decided to abuse Aegon and Helaena. So: is Alicent Hightower a bad mom? In the end, yes, she is. She might not be the worst mother, and she certainly should not be faulted if she doesn't love her children - but the thing is she DOES love her children and still abuses them.
Agreed, but I would also at least somewhat apply Heleana’s abuse to Aegon as well as he did not want to marry her, and apparently only be with her when drunk
@@islasullivan3463 I mean, this marriage is somehwat abusive towards Aegon either as he was forced to be with her. He might be abusing towrads Helaena, but this whole marriage idea was straightorward abuse of both her and him.
^Thank you that is what I was trying to say.
Absolutely agree
My problem is that people try and act like Rhae is a good mother when honestly she is pretty equally bad. At our first introduction to her children we learn 2 thing, 1. That they are illegitimate and 2. They are bullying another child because they do not have a dragon. She then refuses to give her child a straight answer when he asks a question which will fundamentally change his life by telling him it doesn't matter. When her son is grieving his father, she tell's him to shut up and go comfort his cousin instead of actually helping him deal with the stress of losing his father, something that she doesn't even say they can discuss this later in private (which is what a good parent would do.) In fact mere days later, she fake kills her husband and the boy's other father figure as though losing a father figure let alone 2 is not a huge deal for a small child (especially one who was not aware the death was fake.) Back to the bullying thing, while she is off sleeping with her Uncle at his wife's funeral, her children go try and attack the uncle they have been bullying, bringing a knife because he claimed a dragon, which he was well within his rights to do. This altercation includes Aemond being 4 on 1 attacked, and threatened with a knife after verbally insulting her sons calling them bastards (which is not treason, it's true) which leads to Aemond losing an eye disabling the child (which even if calling them bastards wasn't true and was treason is an extreme response.) This on it's own should reflect poorly on her parenting skills as her children don't think any of this is an overreaction but to make matter's worse, she rejects any punishment for her own child but insist that Aemond should be tortured because of his comments, which once again are true! (because that is what sharply questioned means.) Her response to literally ever issue is to make her kids go to bed instead of actually parenting them in any way, and this never happens when her kids are in the wrong as a punishment she just makes them leave whenever she doesn't want to deal with them anymore. As evident by her children's role in war she hasn't at all prepared her children for anything, which she absolutely should have given this war was obviously building for literal decades. But for some reason only Alicent cops any backlash for this, when if anything only Aemond did anything to actually meaningfully prepare for the conflict.
Also the narrative that Alicent doesn't love her children is crazy, she spends so much of her time with Heleana and Aemond really seems to respect his mother and go into harms way to protect her. Even though she doesn't have the strongest relationship with Aegon at the end of the day she to puts her body over him to try a shield him from Meleys at the coronation. When they have their tense moment when Aegon is grieving she is actively blaming herself for this death as well as grieving herself, which causes her to act the way she does, I mean we saw the frantic Rhae on the beach finding her son's body if she was still at that point in her grief when Jace arrived it's unlikely she would have had the same reaction as she did. It takes Jace at least a week to return to dragonstone from the wall, and while that might not seem like much she has had time to decompress, which leaves her only with sadness instead of anger and guilt as her driving emotion.
Is Alicent a good parent either, no of course she isn't but people need to stop acting like Rhae is a perfect mother when she really is far from it even for Westerosi standards.
@@Stay_Zerose my fiancé says that he thinks Rhaenyra is a bad mother because she knew what happens to bastard children from women and should have know what that means for her, especially since it is worse for a woman to have a bastard child than a man in Westeros. Did knowingly did that to those boys - but I think had she not had children with Harwin it would have been worse for her because her life could have easily been ended by the Hightowers.
@madds And she couldn’t have tried to find someone who looks more like Laenor?? And yes while it might have been bad for her but that doesn’t change that knowingly having bastards she chose a very hard and dangerous life for her children.
Most bad moms had bad upbringings.. does that mean, they are not bad mothers?
I think that was such a beautifuly and direct way to describe Allicent a little girl trapped in a woman’s body
@@miguelcorres338 thank you 😌
I agree with your point overall. However, I disagree with your thoughts on driftmark. I thought Aegon was very dismissive of Alicent's warnings in 1x06, but after seeing his brother lose an eye, and his mother commit treason and attack the princess for Aemond, him (and Aemond) realized that their mother was speaking the truth. They have to look after each other because their father will always put his first family over his second one. Calling Rhaenyra's boys bastards was seen as more of an offense than his own child being blinded, and that's when everything shifted for Aegon and Aemond. That's why when Aemond shifts the blame onto Aegon, we see Aegon take it rather than direct it back to his mum. Aemond was always dutiful to his mother, but i think after driftmark he became even closer to her (and that is why her anger over luke is a huge blow to him). She starts losing influence over them because of her stance on the war in s2 tho. Everything else I agree with! I also think it's interesting that when Otto is unable to comfort Alicent, she in-turn is unable to comfort Aegon. Maybe if he had let her confide in him and confess her sins, then she wouldn't be so guilt ridden, and she could then face Aegon as a mother and comfort him. Great showcasing of generational trauma there.
It must have been some hurtful words said for Aemond to go from worshipping the ground his mother walked on, to calling her Alicent. He's even going as far as using a prostitute as a surrogate or substitute for Alicent. After watching tonight's episode, I don't know if he will listen to his mother anymore or not.
Love the name haha
You also need to remember that Lucerys was Viserys' grandson, and you also have three different people saying it was done in self defense. You want Viserys to be more upset about Aemon getting hurt in a fight that he both started and escalated?
It was only his fault that he was blinded.
And then they forgot about all of that in season 2 weak ass writing bruh
Yes. Alicent suffers from intergenerational family abuse passed down from parent to child.
Generational abuse and being manipulated by her father.. He literally pimped her out to Viserys!
Personally, I can't stand Alicent as a parent.
I understand she was a child herself when she had Aegon and Helaena (and I think Aemond, too).
But she is absolutely horrible to Aegon. She seems annoyed by his very existence, as if he were to blame for being bred into existing.
She forces Helaena to do stuff she doesn't want to, much like Otto, towards herself.
She told Rhaenyra last episode "You know what Aemond is". Like, yeah... she knows because you turned them against their sister, Alicent.
And any time Daeron is mentioned, she looks annoyed and constipated. I would wager they don't have a strong relationship, either.
Alicent was definitely a child bride, but she grew up, she was the Queen Consort to a very malleable man and now she reaps what she sowed.
She was a terrible person that shaped her sons into being monsters, but now she's playing victim.
I think all the criticism she gets is deserved, except that time people were angry because she looked bored while talking to Helaena. At least then, she was trying.
Saying that Alicent turned them against Rhaenyra is slightly unfair bc regardless of what Alicent told him Aemond would hate Rhaenyra and her kids due to the loss of his eye and Rhaenyra asking for him to be tortured over where he heard the rumors like he didn’t have two eyes an hour ago.
It’s also not like Rhaenyra did anything to improve her relationships with her siblings by the fact that she only refers to them as Alicent’s children or as half-sibling.
@islasullivan3463 Aemond would not have lost his eye if both sides of parents had stopped being babies and fostered love between the children. The lose of the eye and alicents violence after was exactly what to they fostered for years
@Ayshagyle Yes and Aemond would not have lost his eye if the kids had actually been properly supervised by the parents, and the knights. But instead one was sleeping and the other was going off to sleep with her uncle on the night of his wife’s funeral.
And again it’s not Rhaenyra did anything to foster any real love between her siblings and herself.
I think Alicent hates Aegon because he bullied his brother and graped servants in the palace. If you look at the scene in the first episode where he goes to pick up Jaeherys, all of the women there seem to be afraid of him. Aemond hated the other side of the family just due to bullying, but Aegon actually seemed to get along with them. The night Aemond lost his eye is the night that everything turned sour.
This right here! Viserys was neglectful, but Alicent is the one who bred hate and blood lust into her sons against Rhaenyra and her son's. She is now playing the victim because she can't manipulate them to her will and turn off the war machine she started.
Really, the only one of Alicents kids she ever showed any physical affection for was Aemond. Olivia Cooke alao said the only one of Alicents kids that actually loves her is Aemond.
Which is so different from the books where she only shows Helaena attention
lol, she coddled Aemond, a little too much.
She's not a bad mom. She's a horrible, irresponsible almost cruel mom.
she is exactly the same way as Otto was with her...she sees her children more like pawns in a larger political game , overall Alicent does just everything wrong...and we can see it already when Helaena and Aegon are just children...she clearly doesnt enjoy raising them , she isnt able to connect with them either and basically ignores them, I dont like Aegon but my heart broke when I saw how she treats him , when Aegon loses his son and cries then Alicent just walks away without even trying to comfort him , she calls him useless eventhough she never did anything to prepare him either only thing she did was to brainwash Aegon into thinking that Rhaenyra wants him dead , she literally raised him to be who he is today and then later when Aegon almost dies and is definetly on his lowest point, Alicent just walks away again leaving Aegon alone calling for his mother( that broke my heart) also with Aemond , its soo funny when Alicent says to Aemond in season 1 that " oh you cant call Rhaenyras sons strong" while she literally raised them like this, she told them all the time that its okay to call Rhaenyras sons bastards and Rhaenyra herself a w*ore....she shouldnt be surprised at all that her children act like this
This take confuses me so much because she seems to be affectionate with Haelana and Aemond (before killing Luke). The only child she seems to hate is Aegon, but I can give her some leeway due to the fact that he grapes servant girls.
@@user-xh6jk4mi8u The writing is frustrating. They can’t make up their minds about these characters. It’s like the writers don’t understand their own creation. Which makes a frustrating watch
@@bh3855 Rhaenyra is one of the worst victims too. Rhaenyra going from grief and wanting Aemond’s head to hatching a harebrained scheme to go to King’s Landing to seek peace with Alicent is such a disservice.
@@user-xh6jk4mi8u Agreed, very much. Obviously they want her to be on screen as often as possible as she is a main character but my God, did they make her completely uninteresting and not compelling even a little bit. They are so afraid to make her have some edge, flaw or some personality. Just awful. The whole season is saved by team green scenes even if they are terrible people. Even Alicent's scenes have been much better than that of Rhaenyra. She at least goes through changes, Rhaenyra whinned about being a woman for 5 episodes while not even naming a hand the whole time.
I think she’s a bad mom, but I also think that’s a predictable result of a father manipulating a teenager into marrying a man thrice her age and thus forcing her to have his children.
While I agree with some of your character analysis I think the show runners made the comparisons purposefully evident between the two of them and that Alicent is meant to seem like a bad mother
@@aryanahampton I agree but I also think they’ve given us enough to recognize why each parent the way they do!
She's undoubtedly a bad mom. But did she ever get a chance to be a good mom? I'd say no.
Nah, I get upbringing and trauma but A is objectively a worse parent, and toxic af (even considering the "time period/expectations" or whatever) lol.
Explanations arent excuses.
i mean, multiple things can be true at once.
So my issue is Alicent plays both sides. So either the direction of her writing changed or she plays like she hasn’t been playing the game. I do agree she originally wasn’t trying to play it she was forced into it. But the scene where she comes in after Aegon was relieving himself to the world her words were to him “ he will be king”. That implies somewhere in her mind she want to take the crown from Rhaeynra, so she was playing the game. So she isn’t innocent she wasn’t just about duty. Also she clearly has favorites but never prepped or prepared her kids to rule though she wanted them too. She became Otto so I can see why she’s compared to Cersei who did the same but in still get a weird sense of more love from Cersei towards her kids. However I get Alicent didn’t choose to have hers like Cersei did. The scene with Aegon and scene with Otto about how she was playing the game showed me at some point they were going to have Alicent go darker then switch it Like she got overeager and misheard or misunderstood her husband.
Goading your child into committing a suicidal act? mother of the year
Young Alicent is such a cutie.
I think Alicent wants to be a good mom, but she has this thing that holds her back from being a true mother. I think she let's fear cloud her mind. She's been sculpted and misguided by old men her whole life. When you're raised by a bunch of old men, I'm sure it dulls her motherly instincts a hair. I imagine it would make her a bit harder as a mother. Then again, I don't know. She had an opportunity to stop the war or at least try to come to an understanding, but she didn't, so I don't know.
I think she wants to be a good mother but does not know how. And if you are talking about her talk with Rhaenyra in the Sept, by then it was already too late to stop the war as blood has been spilled on both sides, and Alicent already does not have much say in the council if she came in saying stop I misunderstood Viserys words, was going to stop them.
I think she did initially try to stop the war by sending Otto with the page of the book they would always read to Rhaenyra, but Aemond killing Luke ruined any chance for peace.
Aemond loves Alicent because she was the only one standing up for him after he lost his eye. This is why he tracks down Aegon for her in S1.
hmmm, love her how? His relationship with Sylvi is weird.
@@Nalhirrim think Aemond loves her and I think Alicent loves him, but Aemond has deep rooted mommy issues because Alicent is not nurturing because she does not know how. Aemond is very angry with his mother. He’s angry he was born as a second boy to a brother who sucks and gets a lot of attention.
You kinda look like a young Alicent ^^ very pretty!!! Great video too. ♥
Someone new to obsess with about ASOIAF! Love your channel immediately!
We are used to seeing bad men in positions of power in media and history. It’s a trope afterall. Selfish men with power on their mind being the villain.
This series has clearly disturbed many modern people. They can’t see two women both being equally bad people.
Cercei is a better mother than Alicent 😅
Goodness guys this is where we have become! A GoT story about a mother who is worse than Cersei!!! How could these writers do this.
ofc she's a bad mom, she never had a real role model around AND she was still a child when she had her kids
Alicent is a horrible mother. Rhaenyra is an amazing mom. End of discussion.
This right here.
TLDR; Yes.
Imagine if people are so obsessed with women's actions what is viserys credit then
This might be just me talking but I despise Alicent she's very hypocritical and is not a mother to her children she basically sees them as not her children. I always feel for Aegon the most he was neglected and treated like he didn't even exist.
No but writers destroyed her character
Alicent knew exactly what her father wanted her to do. She wanted an heir to replace Rhaenyra. She heard what she wanted to hear, She wants Aegon on the throne no matter how unfit. She lets her kids torture Aemon but blames Rhaenyra's kids. She demands to see Rhaenyra's infant instead of walking across the hall. She demanded a SEVEN YEAR OLD'S EYE, something Aemon decides is his right. She marries her gentle, mentally challenged daughter to her monster rapist kid who lets his own bastards fight each other with filed teeth. She lets Llarys pleasure himself to her feet and has an affair with Cole, which was her issue with Rhaenyra in the first place. When she sees Rhaenyra in the Sept she realizes she was wrong and apparently feels no guilt whatsoever. AWFUL person. Cause of the entire war. That entire war! All on her! I'm so glad at the very end the Hightowers wind up as Bronn's bannermen. They deserve it.
Both are bad moms. Tf? Alicent and Rheanyra are bad women. Neither should be examples to follow.
While Rheanyra and her kids have a better relationship. It’s not for good reasons. Rheanyra is childish. She’s immature well into her adulthood. Probably because of her father. Both of them are bad elites.
Isn’t that the point? That both these women are bad people?
Yes, she is.
18:40 gave me the ick I don’t think your intentionally victim blaming but it does kinda sound that way I would have said “Any unwanted children caused by Aagon’s actions against her.” But that’s just me sorry, love your hair btw. ☺️
Is that a question? 💀
Man that is one question I know fs the answer is yes to. I love watching fans talk about the show but let’s discuss something less obvious
Yes she is
Yes? Like, i can understand why she isn't the best mother to her children. She is not like Cersei exactly.
Weird take. They’re both bad moms. All targs are bad parents. Only Jahearys the conciliator was a good ruler. Every single other Targ was awful.
I know I’m a dude, but both Alicent and Rhaenyra are bad women. They’re both bad mothers, bad rulers, that’s why this whole Dance started.
To everyone in the comments:
Yes, Rheanyra is a FAR better mother than Alicent. But everything has been in Rheanyra's favor as explained in the video.
How do you expect Alicent to be a better mother just because she's an adult? Go to therapy? Where and how do you expect her to learn how to treat her children right?
She's never known or felt real parental love. She has no one to talk to and get parental advice from .
I think everyone is expecting too much from her.
I’m a little confused as to how Laenor and Rhaenyras marriage could be considered “better”
Than Viserys and Alicent. Laenor is a gay man is he not? Then Rhaenyra goes on to have multiple bastard children. To me it’s kinda whatever but that of course complicated things even further than they already were.
Well they both have an understanding that they don’t want to be together but are trying to make the best of it and at least listen to each other, their relationship is consensual, so even if there is no romantic love there is a bit of a friendship, and they have an open relationship.
Way better than Viserys and Alicent as Viserys does not actually listen to Alicent, and Alicent gets marital graped by Viserys.
The marriage with Laenor is automatically better than Alice and Viserys because Laenor doesn’t force Rhaenyra to sleep with him whenever he wants.
Considering Alicent agreed to the marriage certainly the expectation exists that she fulfill her marital duties and help to produce heirs no? Rhaenyra and Laenor on the other hand apparently cannot produce any heirs and so their marriage is really rather pointless. This is a medieval society after all and it just seems kind of silly to me to project the modern complete and total lack of respect for the institution of marriage on to it.
@caseyhart She actually did not agree to the marriage Otto ordered her to visit Viserys and Viserys did not ask for her hand he just announced that he was going to marry her to everyone. Also you really expected this 15 year old to say no to the most powerful man in the country. It’s very likely Alicent felt she could not refuse Viserys.
Alicent was not given a choice. both times the maid comes into her chambers to tell her Viserys has asked for her she says “The hour is quite late” and if that wasn’t clear enough to the audience we literally see her beneath Viserys staring up at the ceiling and barely responding to anything (likely disassociating).
Just bc Alicent isn’t fighting him doesn’t mean it’s consensual. Just because she doesn’t realize or acknowledge that this is grape doesn’t mean Alicent isn’t being graped.
First
She is no better a parent than her father, slightly worse actually.
SO well said. I was waiting for a deep-dive into this topic, and this exceeded my expectations 🤍