This man & his research have made a lot of question marks i've carried around in my head for years disappear. I sure would enjoy meeting and having a chat with this brilliant man.
Yes!! Me too and I wonder why I’m just now discovering him seeing as how I relentlessly searched for this type of content 2 years ago and he never came across my radar. HOWEVER IN HINDSIGHT. I wouldn’t have been mentally ready to absorb the info as effectively then so There goes the higher power being rite on time again!!!🥵
@@ProdbyCeeSick Absolutely! Everything arrives when it's needed courtesy of our higher powers. I love the phrase "When the pupil is ready the lesson appears"
i knew the connection between illness and childhood. the study in my family of death and trauma is so evident to me. my aunt died of cancer, she said "do i have to die so everyone will get along". my brother died of m.s., he had hearing issues, criticized by my father, drinking, and another brother who died of cancer- he was the lost/forgotten child in a big family. he always felt unloved, unwanted and doomed. My mother died of a broken heart, abused by my father. I made up my mind- my nanny lived to be 95, she had values, morals and a strong belief in God...lived much alone and healthy connections- which is what i will do. My past does not define me..i choose to live an honest, joyful healthy long life, walk away from abuse.
@@deepachaudhury4336 that is unnecessary. There is trauma when a child doesn't bond to its birth mother and you are making comments about their financial status. Not appropriate
I’m 65 years and went through 12 years of psychotherapy when I was younger. I married for 35 years and divorced last year. Listening to this was what I needed. I broke down crying during it. I have a new outlet for everyone including myself. I’ve always been too nice. I’m learning boundaries and assertiveness finally and I’m healing a chronic condition. Hallelujah. It’s never too late. Thank you from my ❤️.
I am 65 also have been on a healing journey for all my life but actually the past 5 years have been life changing. I felt pretty silly that I didn’t realize the issues I was dealing with earlier in life. Celebrating with you! God bless! 😊❤
I don’t have enough words to describe how much admiration I have for the immensely helpful ways Dr. Gabor has put his lectures into effect. I mean from studies to completely understandable conclusions..I sincerely hope that Western society will catch up- and quickly, to the simple facts that need to be addressed: the whole person is the part to examine thoroughly- not only the illnesses, but first, the cause. Thank you infinitely for your lifetime achievement in studying, practicing and especially, sharing your valuable knowledge! God bless.
Western society has little interest/benefit in understanding or implementing his ideas or strategies..imo...the people who benefit from troubled humans are making all the money and money is power in the west...
With the exception of a few points he's tried to make, I agree with a lot of what he says. I'll take those parts that I believe are unquestionable and leave a few I disagree with.
I live in New Zealand which is a tiny country near Australia. I'm an addict of anything hard n fast, keeps me slim n didn't give me time to 'FEEL'. From listening to Gabor i know why I got Multiple sclerosis (MS). I wasn't listening to my body I kept using and self-abusing my mind body and soul along with never expressing my feelings/emotions needs/wants EVER to get an autoimmune dis-ease. I am meditating, being more at peace trying to live in the moment and bring EASE to self dissolving the DIS (DIS-EASE) you wouldn't even know i have MS it's 2022 I was violated as a child, then teen n again in my early 20s violent abusive terrifying daily PAIN. I saw 'him' 1st time since I got away from him, in 2013 at a music festival I was at with my fiance and I froze couldn't move, partner had2 help me sit, when I needed to go toilet i was in total physiological, psychological SHOCK n got diagnosed with MS a little after i saw him. I always thought I had been triggered so badly from seeing him that was why I got MS but hearing Gabor matè's talks i know it is because I never expressed myself when I needed to n I isolated myself from connections apart from partners being the absolute reason I got MS. The more I have therapy and express my feelings or journal the less symptoms I am having 🙏 Bless Gabor his knowledgeable learnings and teachings 🙏 I am feeling soooo grateful for him to be in this world. I hope everybody learns from him.
He is 100% right. The one thing he has left out is our education system. It's skewed for political and business gain, not the enrichment of the human race. Any scholar or professional who goes against their "education" in the university system is subject to punishment for telling the truth. Just ask Dr. Ira Price. He is Ontario's foremost expert on cannabinoid medicine and he has been punished more than any other doctor just for wanting to help people overcome physical and mental illness. As a person with Complex PTSD, we also need to address the healing process for people like me. We need to tell society that it is up to the individual HOW they want to proceed with the families who abused them and STOP telling them that 1. blood is thicker than water and 2. Make peace with your parents before it's too late. Someone like me doesn't want to keep hearing how wrong we are for trying to heal, live our lives, be free from abusers and abuse and be ok with never going back. We do NOT need society victimizing us again. I've come too far to be listening to other people's shit psychology.
Points 1 and 2 didn't hit a nerve for sure. The only healing I'll get is the healing I work for and receive on my own. People sit in their trauma, both wittingly and unwittingly, and expect everyone else to do the same. I've lived in that cesspool long enough. It's time to move forward.
Dr Gabor, wish I had found you before. Yes I agree that child sexual abuse is trauma which has caused my addiction and depression. I am getting better slowly, but daily . Thankyou
I'm thinking of you, never, never feel desperate or harm yourself- I speak from an abusive background too, sexually abused ironically by my psychiatrist! The creep who hired to fix what my parents did- no laughs. I am happy for you. Isnt this man a true "sage "? Namaste, Z.
@@MSYNGWIE12 you probably won't see this but I was with a therapist when I was 28, I finally put together 11 months clean from heroin addiction. One day he asked me if I knew where to buy some dope and I felt like it was a message from the universe that it was okay to get high,i did think that, I was young, anyways I did and we ended up getting high together. He had been doing drugs all along and running a drug rehab and a one on one therapist. I just thought I'd share that because you are the first person I've ever heard went through something akin to what I did. Peace out.
I have multiple sclerosis. And this guy is right. My childhood hasn't been the way it was supposed to be. And my teenage period was a nightmare, a long lasting one. I was forbidden to cry and didn't have freedom. Thank you, Gabor Mate for telling us all these
I understand you very well and I congratulate you on healing yourself. My childhood wasnt the way it was supposed to be either. I was physically and every day psychologically abused. I wasnt allowed to cry when I was yelled at by my father. In the name of giving me discipline, my father was trying to teach me things to make my life easier but his methods were terribly wrong. He used to yell at me too loud every day when I was 3,4,5,6,7,8,9 years old. I was too little, sensitive, and very silent child, very well behaved but still I wasnt good enough for my father. Every day he would come home from work and he would call me and yell at me. Every day I would wet my pants in front of him. I would be so ashamed, start to cry and he would tell me not to cry and that I was weak, then he would turn to my mom and accuse her of raising me as a weak, irresponsible child. He would treat my mom the same way he treated me. He never hugged me or kissed me on the cheeks. I remember how he taught me to ride bicycle. That was a nightmare. I was 9 yrs old. While learning the tire of the bicycle touched his white jeans and he had gotten so angry. He never had anger management. He had yelled at me as usual. He had told me I that I wasnt paying attention. I learned to ride that bicycle in pne hour, on icy and snowy grounds, it was a tough winter and it was -2,3 degrees (celcius) so instead of congratulating his 9 yrs old daughter who learned to ride the bicycle on icy grounds in one hour he kept putting me down. So all these traumas hit me hard at my teen age yrs and adult years too. I had several suicide attempts. I really wanted to die but somehow I couldnt die. I have oto immune system illnesses, high stress and depression. I am a college gaduate. I do have a good, respected job. I am a communication and leadership skills trainer. I am certified from very respectful international training companies. I am 49 yrs old and my father still tells me that I am a big dissapointment for him and that I should have been an auditor at a financial corporation, that way I would be making 4 times of what I am making as a trainer. He finds me unsuccessful in life. I educated my self in psychology in my 30s and since 35, I learned not to blame my father because I understood that he himself was very traumatised as a child and he could not heal himself. I am still trying to heal my self. Again, I congratulate you for your strength. ❤👌🙏👏👏
I gave up social work because I didn’t believe in what they were practicing...I always subscribed to Bowlby’s Attachment theory, which is very much what Gabor is expounding on but into adult illness!!! Thank you Gabor!
As someone who works in detox and rehab I put this on for everyone and almost all related to Gobor's words, incredible man and my go to for all talks on trauma.
I'm just like you. The worse for me when my Alcoholic Dad who raised me Died. He was in war twice. He goes to work yet came home and drank. My pets raised me. And gave me unconditional love. My abuse was sexual beaten by my Guardian and he molest me. My childhood dreams to become a veterinarian. To give back to my pets who took care of me. My dad died when I was 14. Left me two houses a four-bedroom and two bedroom He left me and Life insurance. Enough for college. My Guardian owed United California Bank money and Red Owl Liquor store money they took everything to pay his debt. I was 15 Norwalk Supreme Court did nothing to get it back. UCB bank because of what they did to me change their name. That is what hurt the most taking my childhood dream away. My guardian beat me with 2 * 4 and molested me.
Hi, I'm 19 and just wanna share my story. I grew up in a normal household. I never realized this, but now that I'm transitioning to the young adult life, I notice how my parents rarely praise me or give me physical touch as signs of affection (grew up in an asian household). I know they care about me, but somehow the need for physical touch and approval keep getting bigger and bigger. It hurts terribly when I'm in pain emotionally. For once, I just want them to ask me how I'm doing, without me having to approach them first. I do find myself procrastinating or indulging when I feel too much in pain. And they do interfere with my productivity in life, which I'm quite saddened at. But on the other side, I know my parents did not receive those types of affection. So right now I'm just figuring out how to get better so I can focus on my life again.. I've been unhappy.
You are on the road to a better life, simply recognising the trauma caused by loving yet distant parents is a significant step. I had similar early childhood needs to be touched, held and loved that lead to poor choices with drugs alcohol and partners. At 65 years old the pain is still there but so is an understanding of the root causes, people don’t change unless they want to.
I am the first to attempt to break the cycles with my children. There are many wrongs I've had to face from childhood early with family. I needed to hear this today. I woke up with an overwhelming feeling of not being worthy and very depressed and alone. This video was a reminder that I have to keep going to make my children's future right. I've never been addicted to any substance or anything but keep finding ways to cut out anyone even my own mother from my life who I recognize as an abusive person. In return am supporting my children's positive relationships. Showing them the opposite of how Ive been forced to live. It's the hardest thing to do.
This is one of the channels that gave me the courage to start my RUclips channel 10 months ago about self development. Now I have 1,969 subs and > 2k hours of watch time. I know it’s not comparable with others but I’m still proud I started because I’ve been learning so many lessons that I could haven’t learned without getting started in the 1st place.
Just the pure existence of this man is so astoundingly important. I literally felt myself heal just by the validation he gave through this 18 minute video. I hope his legacy will carry on forever. A great and wonderful man. Thank you.
I hope you heal my friend, but this man won't help you - what's he saying is completely anti-scientific bullshit based on his own neo-freudian ideas that have been long debunked. Please look for help in better places!
I am so grateful to you Gabor. I pass on your wisdom and like experience to my children to encourage them to value parenting above worldly and our cultural sick ideas of what success is.
GOD this is so true . He just explained my whole life in 15 minutes . Holy fuck Addiction , always being nice , not letting anger out , letting others step all over my boundaries . Being extra nice
Never heard of him. This is mind blowing to me. Though I had a problem adjusting to his accent, I like his succint and logical explanation of things. I'm not new to the subject.. But much encouraged and enlightened by his delivery. Thank you. 🌹🌹🌹
Dr. Gabor Mate, honestly,, I DON'T THINK WORDS CAN DESCRIBE JUST HOW AMAZING THIS MAN IS!!! HIS KNOWLEDGE,, ALL OF HIS WORK,, IT SHOULD BE A COMPULSORY STUDY BY ALL HUMANKIND !!!
I am just reading on of your book and I wana say that for me and my family you are one of the most beautiful human in the world.Thank you for shearing your past and your path, helping me to be better person, better parent
Bcz working with children, retired now, this makes so much sense. LOVE this guy!!!! PLUS, seen how the correct environment actually works, most of all patience and a gentle/quiet attitude is exactly what makes it work.
Wow eye opening and a huge amount of truth bombs by this wise man. I had childhood trauma but did the whole I’m fine, I’m fine....until one big event just opened up that was traumatic and everything came up at once. It effected my health an I coped by taking more pain pills than what I needed. We handle addiction in this country so badly. We definitely need to change the paradigm on how we punish addictive behaviors. I found this because of Kourtney Kardashian’s Twitter link. Thanks KK
I found this video so inspiring. I remember I cried the first time I saw a short clip extracted from it. I finally found the integral one. In my opinion it's a great summary of modern society. Also very understandable, in less than 20 mins he explains the foundations of psychology in a "pop" way.
After watching a cartoon video by Dr gabor mate about childhood truma i understood why I had started taken drugs which eventually lead to a 24 year heroin/cocaine addiction through watching that video I found myself and was healed I didn't know I had childhood truma but after watching I relised I had thank you so much Dr gabor mate you give me back my life
This is very helpful because it allows me to understand that I am important and not take peoples problems personally, but also set my boundaries. Just because someone had a rough childhood does not give them the right to justify their behaviors. It should Empower them to say and take action to develop personal growth in the areas they need.
After the video, been thinking about my childhood, the trauma I got from my parents, the facade I put up at school being the "go-to" person, and the addiction I have with video games. All of it was somewhat correlated with my current understanding of how I got my depression. I've been thinking of how weak I was compared to who I was pre-pandemic until I got in college, online classes, and started out as anti-social, to becoming curious, and now, emotionally betrayed and depressed. Thanks to a random comment suggesting Sir Gabor, I have realized that not every problem have a single cause, it originated from a root cause and branches out to the point that you forget and overreact. Another additional topic for my overthinking! Thank you for educating everyone😊
I love the wisdom that Dr Gabor is putting forth. I do want to add a qualification to his statement that auto immune diseases are caused by trauma. For years I suffered from an auto immune condition and by my own reading I figured out that wheat gluten was at the root of my condition, so now that I've removed that I no longer have those physical maladies.
There are many types of therapy. For example, EMDR (please try it even if it seems weird) , físical experience like yoga or other body practices, internal family system. Etc.
While Gabor talks to us, he brings us at a whole new level. Many explanations he brought up here, gave us new recognizing thoughts for ourself, bringing us back to sensitivity once lost in time.. We all are factually hardened, in the way school's are set up for our later achiefment in this hardened society of us.., and we still bring 'our most beloveds' there, handing them over to uglyness. There is no such thing as a 'grey area' in Life itself, it is right, or it is bended, true or un-true ( which is false ), although our minds thinks in compromised mixtures, 'it is alright'. And here we are, with all our personal trauma's big or very small.., hardened against them, not sensitive at all. Buying a 'jeep' to ride a city, or a watch to connect my phone.. Asking myself after listening to Gabor, how long will his words be active, in the fight of my job? Thanks RILD for sharing to us! :-)
He absolutely speaks the truth. I recently went to a talk at Gonzaga University by a scientist who researches the connection between childhood negative events or abuse to mental and physical disease later in life. I was able to speak with her afterwards about my own issues.
Beautiful speech. Such care and compassion in his demeanour, voice and words. Honestly it feels like I’m lighter and less stressed just for having watched this. I feel like this should be mandatory viewing for all human beings. Trauma is a vicious cycle, and we all must make efforts to break it.
Thank you and may what you know, and what we have learned and know ti be true change the world and make this world a place worth living...and loving...and dying with and for.
I truly wish I could meet him in person and tell him I've found the same results by looking and wondering about my own life. I was fortunate to find ways toward healing but the pian...so much respect and appreciation for thses teachers of humanity.
I am 28 years old and Im having terrible abdominal pain. Still no diagnosis. but I have anxiety and I think it’s linked to a lot of childhood trauma . Such a heartwarming talk
.....Loretto, I don't want to be in the business of diagnosing be ause I have no medical background but I figured out I was celiac ( suffered abdominal pains) ....don't have ANY wheat gluten for 3 weeks and see if there's a difference???
I think every person should watch this. no matter If you have experienced childhood trauma, it helps you understand maybe why a person acts the way they do. Childhood abusive and neglect is more common than we think
I think I wrote an essay in my phone's Journaling app by taking so many notes from this presentation. Amazing doctor, amazing speech. Thank you so much for your researches and all the contributions to this world. I will work on my healing from your advices.
Our full attention to the trauma we receive in our lives, can potentially be an unimaginable, immense source of personal (psychic/mental) power, which is exactly what is necessary for someone to overcome the root of the problems that affect us. It's terrible how easy it is for the industries; that cater to the problems that exist in society, to take advantage, or even exacerbate these problems.
THANK YOU, Dr. Gabor, so much for shedding so many insights, light, and compassion in my life, and for others, with the ability to allow myself to see EVERY single reason why my health issues exist. You've opened up so much in my subconscious and gave me the opportunity to be able to understand why and how, and in that knowing, I can begin to treat myself to heal in ways I've never before considered. You are a blessing to this world beyond words.
This is all true. Parents take note; I'm not saying treat your children as fragile beings that will just shatter at any given word/deed, kids are resilient. BUT: be careful what you say to your kids. How you treat them, how you behave around them. I lived through extreme psychological/emotional abuse from before I was born until I was in my late teens. I'm 58 and I'm still struggling with my self worth. And boy! What a terrible struggle it has been and still am.
Dr.gabor mate you are the best, you know what your talking about, you make soooo much sense I can identify with some of the things you say! Linda I love you 🙂🙏 God bless you!
I told myself that whatever bothered me as a young person will give me trouble now. I twisted my ankle in my teens and I am dealing with it now at 52. This may be a superficial , but I understand what he is saying. It all makes sense.
I am raising a prenatally drug and alcohol exposed child with complex trauma and attachment issues. It's a hard life for this little guy and our whole family. You are saying the things I have learned about devastatingly, through the eyes of a child. I've created my RUclips channel to share our life and support other families on this path.
I felt this Ted talk on a whole other level!! I grew up with my mom who was a heroine addict who would leave for weeks and months just to go on binges with her tweaker friends or boyfriend she had at the time! Watching her use drugs and my brother was the hardest thing that I have witnessed and no kid should grow up around it. Addiction is no fuckin joke and I watched it kill my mom and brother!!
Dr. Gabor, You made a beautiful video about your thoughts on the current war in the middle East. I really wanted to share it with a friend but I can't find it on your channel. Many thanks and Blessings to you.🙏
Listening to Dr Gabor Maté at the age of 67 makes me realise I never had a chance. Shocking emotional environment in utero. No one clever enough to realise I was fucked in the head as a child & teenager & get meaningful help for me (as if such was even available back then) The miracle is that people like me make it to 67. I was just not emotionally clever enough to realise the pity of my emotional poverty and kill myself. Now I'm too old to care - actually that's not right, I'm working under the delusion that meditation etc can make for a reasonable life. Maybe only someone with severe emotional damage could believe in such a Shangri-La.
As a child I was practically skinned alive with a rubber exercise cord - because I didn't do well in school - the beatings from my mother lasted up to 15yrs of age or more / The trauma haunted me into my sleep - I'm now 67yrs of age - and the trauma has never left me.. Although, in spite of everything - I've done well - but I've been alone...
I’ve always said happy people don’t do drugs. Drugs are a way to temporarily escape your reality. You only want to do that if your realty sucks. But those addictions don’t have to be drugs.
This man & his research have made a lot of question marks i've carried around in my head for years disappear. I sure would enjoy meeting and having a chat with this brilliant man.
💯
Yesssssss
Yes!! Me too and I wonder why I’m just now discovering him seeing as how I relentlessly searched for this type of content 2 years ago and he never came across my radar. HOWEVER IN HINDSIGHT. I wouldn’t have been mentally ready to absorb the info as effectively then so There goes the higher power being rite on time again!!!🥵
@@ProdbyCeeSick Absolutely! Everything arrives when it's needed courtesy of our higher powers. I love the phrase "When the pupil is ready the lesson appears"
👍👍😎
When I listen to him, I want to cry with relief that someone has the answers!
this man is the Master of Common Sense
Well he also has patterns and recorded the evidence through his patients ❤
i knew the connection between illness and childhood. the study in my family of death and trauma is so evident to me. my aunt died of cancer, she said "do i have to die so everyone will get along". my brother died of m.s., he had hearing issues, criticized by my father, drinking, and another brother who died of cancer- he was the lost/forgotten child in a big family. he always felt unloved, unwanted and doomed. My mother died of a broken heart, abused by my father. I made up my mind- my nanny lived to be 95, she had values, morals and a strong belief in God...lived much alone and healthy connections- which is what i will do. My past does not define me..i choose to live an honest, joyful healthy long life, walk away from abuse.
Thank you Makayla
Wow, I admire your belief in life. Thanks for your words. Take care
Amen 🙏
You must be very rich to have a nanny Wow
@@deepachaudhury4336 that is unnecessary. There is trauma when a child doesn't bond to its birth mother and you are making comments about their financial status. Not appropriate
I’m 65 years and went through 12 years of psychotherapy when I was younger. I married for 35 years and divorced last year. Listening to this was what I needed. I broke down crying during it. I have a new outlet for everyone including myself. I’ve always been too nice. I’m learning boundaries and assertiveness finally and I’m healing a chronic condition. Hallelujah. It’s never too late. Thank you from my ❤️.
May allah guide you
I am 65 also have been on a healing journey for all my life but actually the past 5 years have been life changing. I felt pretty silly that I didn’t realize the issues I was dealing with earlier in life. Celebrating with you! God bless! 😊❤
🙏🏽
@@hippieatheart2667 Blessing to YOU , heartly greetings from Austria ❣
It is NEVER too late to have a happy life! ❤️
I don’t have enough words to describe how much admiration I have for the immensely helpful ways Dr. Gabor has put his lectures into effect. I mean from studies to completely understandable conclusions..I sincerely hope that Western society will catch up- and quickly, to the simple facts that need to be addressed: the whole person is the part to examine thoroughly- not only the illnesses, but first, the cause. Thank you infinitely for your lifetime achievement in studying, practicing and especially, sharing your valuable knowledge! God bless.
Western society has little interest/benefit in understanding or implementing his ideas or strategies..imo...the people who benefit from troubled humans are making all the money and money is power in the west...
With the exception of a few points he's tried to make, I agree with a lot of what he says. I'll take those parts that I believe are unquestionable and leave a few I disagree with.
I live in New Zealand which is a tiny country near Australia. I'm an addict of anything hard n fast, keeps me slim n didn't give me time to 'FEEL'. From listening to Gabor i know why I got Multiple sclerosis (MS). I wasn't listening to my body I kept using and self-abusing my mind body and soul along with never expressing my feelings/emotions needs/wants EVER to get an autoimmune dis-ease. I am meditating, being more at peace trying to live in the moment and bring EASE to self dissolving the DIS (DIS-EASE) you wouldn't even know i have MS it's 2022 I was violated as a child, then teen n again in my early 20s violent abusive terrifying daily PAIN. I saw 'him' 1st time since I got away from him, in 2013 at a music festival I was at with my fiance and I froze couldn't move, partner had2 help me sit, when I needed to go toilet i was in total physiological, psychological SHOCK n got diagnosed with MS a little after i saw him. I always thought I had been triggered so badly from seeing him that was why I got MS but hearing Gabor matè's talks i know it is because I never expressed myself when I needed to n I isolated myself from connections apart from partners being the absolute reason I got MS. The more I have therapy and express my feelings or journal the less symptoms I am having 🙏 Bless Gabor his knowledgeable learnings and teachings 🙏 I am feeling soooo grateful for him to be in this world. I hope everybody learns from him.
He is 100% right. The one thing he has left out is our education system. It's skewed for political and business gain, not the enrichment of the human race. Any scholar or professional who goes against their "education" in the university system is subject to punishment for telling the truth. Just ask Dr. Ira Price. He is Ontario's foremost expert on cannabinoid medicine and he has been punished more than any other doctor just for wanting to help people overcome physical and mental illness. As a person with Complex PTSD, we also need to address the healing process for people like me. We need to tell society that it is up to the individual HOW they want to proceed with the families who abused them and STOP telling them that 1. blood is thicker than water and 2. Make peace with your parents before it's too late. Someone like me doesn't want to keep hearing how wrong we are for trying to heal, live our lives, be free from abusers and abuse and be ok with never going back. We do NOT need society victimizing us again. I've come too far to be listening to other people's shit psychology.
I do agree all of us need to steer clear of toxic families
Weed gave me psychosis
Points 1 and 2 didn't hit a nerve for sure. The only healing I'll get is the healing I work for and receive on my own. People sit in their trauma, both wittingly and unwittingly, and expect everyone else to do the same. I've lived in that cesspool long enough. It's time to move forward.
Listening to this man’s voice is my new addiction
Dr Gabor, wish I had found you before. Yes I agree that child sexual abuse is trauma which has caused my addiction and depression. I am getting better slowly, but daily . Thankyou
I am sorry all that happened to you. Keep moving forward. You CAN do this, you CAN heal. You are not alone.
I'm thinking of you, never, never feel desperate or harm yourself- I speak from an abusive background too, sexually abused ironically by my psychiatrist! The creep who hired to fix what my parents did- no laughs. I am happy for you. Isnt this man a true "sage "? Namaste, Z.
ruclips.net/video/KalA5o8YG2k/видео.html
What have you done to try and heal your trauma? Or what can be done ? Just curious?
@@MSYNGWIE12 you probably won't see this but I was with a therapist when I was 28, I finally put together 11 months clean from heroin addiction. One day he asked me if I knew where to buy some dope and I felt like it was a message from the universe that it was okay to get high,i did think that, I was young, anyways I did and we ended up getting high together. He had been doing drugs all along and running a drug rehab and a one on one therapist. I just thought I'd share that because you are the first person I've ever heard went through something akin to what I did. Peace out.
I have multiple sclerosis. And this guy is right. My childhood hasn't been the way it was supposed to be. And my teenage period was a nightmare, a long lasting one. I was forbidden to cry and didn't have freedom. Thank you, Gabor Mate for telling us all these
I understand you very well and I congratulate you on healing yourself. My childhood wasnt the way it was supposed to be either. I was physically and every day psychologically abused. I wasnt allowed to cry when I was yelled at by my father. In the name of giving me discipline, my father was trying to teach me things to make my life easier but his methods were terribly wrong. He used to yell at me too loud every day when I was 3,4,5,6,7,8,9 years old. I was too little, sensitive, and very silent child, very well behaved but still I wasnt good enough for my father. Every day he would come home from work and he would call me and yell at me. Every day I would wet my pants in front of him. I would be so ashamed, start to cry and he would tell me not to cry and that I was weak, then he would turn to my mom and accuse her of raising me as a weak, irresponsible child. He would treat my mom the same way he treated me. He never hugged me or kissed me on the cheeks. I remember how he taught me to ride bicycle. That was a nightmare. I was 9 yrs old. While learning the tire of the bicycle touched his white jeans and he had gotten so angry. He never had anger management. He had yelled at me as usual. He had told me I that I wasnt paying attention. I learned to ride that bicycle in pne hour, on icy and snowy grounds, it was a tough winter and it was -2,3 degrees (celcius) so instead of congratulating his 9 yrs old daughter who learned to ride the bicycle on icy grounds in one hour he kept putting me down. So all these traumas hit me hard at my teen age yrs and adult years too. I had several suicide attempts. I really wanted to die but somehow I couldnt die. I have oto immune system illnesses, high stress and depression. I am a college gaduate. I do have a good, respected job. I am a communication and leadership skills trainer. I am certified from very respectful international training companies. I am 49 yrs old and my father still tells me that I am a big dissapointment for him and that I should have been an auditor at a financial corporation, that way I would be making 4 times of what I am making as a trainer. He finds me unsuccessful in life. I educated my self in psychology in my 30s and since 35, I learned not to blame my father because I understood that he himself was very traumatised as a child and he could not heal himself. I am still trying to heal my self. Again, I congratulate you for your strength. ❤👌🙏👏👏
@@muhalifx626 , I'd love to learn of my strengh which one is it
Thank you Dr. Mate for all that you do. His books need to be taught in every medical school.
I gave up social work because I didn’t believe in what they were practicing...I always subscribed to Bowlby’s Attachment theory, which is very much what Gabor is expounding on but into adult illness!!! Thank you Gabor!
As someone who works in detox and rehab I put this on for everyone and almost all related to Gobor's words, incredible man and my go to for all talks on trauma.
I am a demestic abuse servivor, molestation survivor and I've been seeing a doctor for 33 years and no one has told me this. This mans words are gold.
I'm just like you. The worse for me when my Alcoholic Dad who raised me Died. He was in war twice. He goes to work yet came home and drank. My pets raised me. And gave me unconditional love. My abuse was sexual beaten by my Guardian and he molest me. My childhood dreams to become a veterinarian. To give back to my pets who took care of me. My dad died when I was 14. Left me two houses a four-bedroom and two bedroom He left me and Life insurance. Enough for college. My Guardian owed United California Bank money and Red Owl Liquor store money they took everything to pay his debt. I was 15 Norwalk Supreme Court did nothing to get it back. UCB bank because of what they did to me change their name. That is what hurt the most taking my childhood dream away. My guardian beat me with 2 * 4 and molested me.
Hi, I'm 19 and just wanna share my story. I grew up in a normal household. I never realized this, but now that I'm transitioning to the young adult life, I notice how my parents rarely praise me or give me physical touch as signs of affection (grew up in an asian household). I know they care about me, but somehow the need for physical touch and approval keep getting bigger and bigger. It hurts terribly when I'm in pain emotionally. For once, I just want them to ask me how I'm doing, without me having to approach them first. I do find myself procrastinating or indulging when I feel too much in pain. And they do interfere with my productivity in life, which I'm quite saddened at.
But on the other side, I know my parents did not receive those types of affection. So right now I'm just figuring out how to get better so I can focus on my life again.. I've been unhappy.
Here's a virtual hug: 🤗
Jessica buy his books & really keep working on your self so that your future will be safe & beautiful 🙏 💐
See the inner yats on Instagram... he talks about attachment theory and healing emotions and needs that your parents couldn't give you
You are on the road to a better life, simply recognising the trauma caused by loving yet distant parents is a significant step. I had similar early childhood needs to be touched, held and loved that lead to poor choices with drugs alcohol and partners. At 65 years old the pain is still there but so is an understanding of the root causes, people don’t change unless they want to.
Praying for you
Dr Gabor Mate speaks to my soul. Thank you for sharing your intelligence & wisdom
ruclips.net/video/KalA5o8YG2k/видео.html
Everyone should take time daily to listen to this Dr.! 💓
I love you, Gabor Maté for you research and emathy and big heart
ruclips.net/video/KalA5o8YG2k/видео.html
I am the first to attempt to break the cycles with my children. There are many wrongs I've had to face from childhood early with family. I needed to hear this today. I woke up with an overwhelming feeling of not being worthy and very depressed and alone. This video was a reminder that I have to keep going to make my children's future right. I've never been addicted to any substance or anything but keep finding ways to cut out anyone even my own mother from my life who I recognize as an abusive person. In return am supporting my children's positive relationships. Showing them the opposite of how Ive been forced to live. It's the hardest thing to do.
I concur ...but keep going...you are doing gods work ❤🙏
This is one of the channels that gave me the courage to start my RUclips channel 10 months ago about self development. Now I have 1,969 subs and > 2k hours of watch time. I know it’s not comparable with others but I’m still proud I started because I’ve been learning so many lessons that I could haven’t learned without getting started in the 1st place.
These few minutes have CHANGED my life. I would love to meet him and thank him!
thank you Dr. Maté, you have changed my life.
Just the pure existence of this man is so astoundingly important. I literally felt myself heal just by the validation he gave through this 18 minute video. I hope his legacy will carry on forever. A great and wonderful man. Thank you.
I hope you heal my friend, but this man won't help you - what's he saying is completely anti-scientific bullshit based on his own neo-freudian ideas that have been long debunked. Please look for help in better places!
I am so grateful to you Gabor. I pass on your wisdom and like experience to my children to encourage them to value parenting above worldly and our cultural sick ideas of what success is.
GOD this is so true . He just explained my whole life in 15 minutes . Holy fuck
Addiction , always being nice , not letting anger out , letting others step all over my boundaries . Being extra nice
Never heard of him. This is mind blowing to me. Though I had a problem adjusting to his accent, I like his succint and logical explanation of things. I'm not new to the subject.. But much encouraged and enlightened by his delivery. Thank you. 🌹🌹🌹
Gabor you are brilliant!
ruclips.net/video/KalA5o8YG2k/видео.html
Dr. Gabor Mate, honestly,, I DON'T THINK WORDS CAN DESCRIBE JUST HOW AMAZING THIS MAN IS!!!
HIS KNOWLEDGE,, ALL OF HIS WORK,, IT SHOULD BE A COMPULSORY STUDY BY ALL HUMANKIND !!!
I am just reading on of your book and I wana say that for me and my family you are one of the most beautiful human in the world.Thank you for shearing your past and your path, helping me to be better person, better parent
Bcz working with children, retired now, this makes so much sense. LOVE this guy!!!! PLUS, seen how the correct environment actually works, most of all patience and a gentle/quiet attitude is exactly what makes it work.
Wow eye opening and a huge amount of truth bombs by this wise man. I had childhood trauma but did the whole I’m fine, I’m fine....until one big event just opened up that was traumatic and everything came up at once. It effected my health an I coped by taking more pain pills than what I needed. We handle addiction in this country so badly. We definitely need to change the paradigm on how we punish addictive behaviors. I found this because of Kourtney Kardashian’s Twitter link. Thanks KK
I found this video so inspiring. I remember I cried the first time I saw a short clip extracted from it. I finally found the integral one.
In my opinion it's a great summary of modern society. Also very understandable, in less than 20 mins he explains the foundations of psychology in a "pop" way.
After watching a cartoon video by Dr gabor mate about childhood truma i understood why I had started taken drugs which eventually lead to a 24 year heroin/cocaine addiction through watching that video I found myself and was healed I didn't know I had childhood truma but after watching I relised I had thank you so much Dr gabor mate you give me back my life
I was in foster care as an infant, only found out a few years ago, now I know it was more than the trauma I already knew about!
Gabor Mate is amazing, I admire him so much.
This is very helpful because it allows me to understand that I am important and not take peoples problems personally, but also set my boundaries. Just because someone had a rough childhood does not give them the right to justify their behaviors. It should Empower them to say and take action to develop personal growth in the areas they need.
This I think is the most revealing , amazing Speach I ever heard … so much to heal , so much to forgive …Thank you 🙏🏻
This Guy is a genius in my eyes, absolutely spot on!
After the video, been thinking about my childhood, the trauma I got from my parents, the facade I put up at school being the "go-to" person, and the addiction I have with video games. All of it was somewhat correlated with my current understanding of how I got my depression. I've been thinking of how weak I was compared to who I was pre-pandemic until I got in college, online classes, and started out as anti-social, to becoming curious, and now, emotionally betrayed and depressed. Thanks to a random comment suggesting Sir Gabor, I have realized that not every problem have a single cause, it originated from a root cause and branches out to the point that you forget and overreact. Another additional topic for my overthinking! Thank you for educating everyone😊
I’m addicted to listening to Dr Mate…
I love the wisdom that Dr Gabor is putting forth. I do want to add a qualification to his statement that auto immune diseases are caused by trauma. For years I suffered from an auto immune condition and by my own reading I figured out that wheat gluten was at the root of my condition, so now that I've removed that I no longer have those physical maladies.
An amazing healer. Thank you 💙
Oh the thing about not feeling worthy is so true.
you took your time addressing the problem but only short few second on how to solve it? what a good job !
There are many types of therapy. For example, EMDR (please try it even if it seems weird) , físical experience like yoga or other body practices, internal family system. Etc.
@@EvgeniiaDolinenko I appreciate your help. Thank you
While Gabor talks to us, he brings us at a whole new level.
Many explanations he brought up here, gave us new recognizing thoughts for ourself, bringing us back to sensitivity once lost in time..
We all are factually hardened, in the way school's are set up for our later achiefment in this hardened society of us.., and we still bring 'our most beloveds' there, handing them over to uglyness.
There is no such thing as a 'grey area' in Life itself, it is right, or it is bended, true or un-true ( which is false ), although our minds thinks in compromised mixtures, 'it is alright'.
And here we are, with all our personal trauma's big or very small.., hardened against them, not sensitive at all.
Buying a 'jeep' to ride a city, or a watch to connect my phone..
Asking myself after listening to Gabor, how long will his words be active, in the fight of my job?
Thanks RILD for sharing to us! :-)
He's very brave. inspiring
Thank you, thank you!! Listened in awe... Brought tears to my eyes. So candid and said with so much humility.
Makes a world of sense! I love this
He absolutely speaks the truth. I recently went to a talk at Gonzaga University by a scientist who researches the connection between childhood negative events or abuse to mental and physical disease later in life. I was able to speak with her afterwards about my own issues.
Beautiful speech. Such care and compassion in his demeanour, voice and words. Honestly it feels like I’m lighter and less stressed just for having watched this. I feel like this should be mandatory viewing for all human beings. Trauma is a vicious cycle, and we all must make efforts to break it.
Nagyon szep beszet. Szerettem halgatni.
Thank You Gabor
Thank you and may what you know, and what we have learned and know ti be true change the world and make this world a place worth living...and loving...and dying with and for.
Thank you so much suddenly a lot of stuff makes sense to me
ruclips.net/video/KalA5o8YG2k/видео.html
I truly wish I could meet him in person and tell him I've found the same results by looking and wondering about my own life. I was fortunate to find ways toward healing but the pian...so much respect and appreciation for thses teachers of humanity.
I am 28 years old and Im having terrible abdominal pain. Still no diagnosis. but I have anxiety and I think it’s linked to a lot of childhood trauma . Such a heartwarming talk
.....Loretto, I don't want to be in the business of diagnosing be ause I have no medical background but I figured out I was celiac ( suffered abdominal pains) ....don't have ANY wheat gluten for 3 weeks and see if there's a difference???
I think every person should watch this. no matter If you have experienced childhood trauma, it helps you understand maybe why a person acts the way they do. Childhood abusive and neglect is more common than we think
I think I wrote an essay in my phone's Journaling app by taking so many notes from this presentation. Amazing doctor, amazing speech. Thank you so much for your researches and all the contributions to this world. I will work on my healing from your advices.
It's Time for Action!!!
It's a Wake Up Call!!!
Let Do.....Our Own Part😇
Start Today!!!
Deeply Honer dr.Gabor Mate 💚🙏🏽💚
Our full attention to the trauma we receive in our lives, can potentially be an unimaginable, immense source of personal (psychic/mental) power, which is exactly what is necessary for someone to overcome the root of the problems that affect us. It's terrible how easy it is for the industries; that cater to the problems that exist in society, to take advantage, or even exacerbate these problems.
fantastic, in his professionalism, in his humanity. Thank you, I have been following you for years, you have opened up a world to me❤
THANK YOU, Dr. Gabor, so much for shedding so many insights, light, and compassion in my life, and for others, with the ability to allow myself to see EVERY single reason why my health issues exist. You've opened up so much in my subconscious and gave me the opportunity to be able to understand why and how, and in that knowing, I can begin to treat myself to heal in ways I've never before considered. You are a blessing to this world beyond words.
Genius, kudos Gabor for keeping it real
This is all true. Parents take note; I'm not saying treat your children as fragile beings that will just shatter at any given word/deed, kids are resilient. BUT: be careful what you say to your kids. How you treat them, how you behave around them. I lived through extreme psychological/emotional abuse from before I was born until I was in my late teens. I'm 58 and I'm still struggling with my self worth. And boy! What a terrible struggle it has been and still am.
Send some personal hug for you man, you suffer enough, you living in pain enough man, hope you getting well and healed....
I adore you dear dr Gabor. Thank you for so much insight and help❤❤❤
Love this man.
Such a beautiful insightful and compassionate talk. Thank you
Dr.gabor mate you are the best, you know what your talking about, you make soooo much sense I can identify with some of the things you say! Linda I love you 🙂🙏 God bless you!
Thank you so much to your channel, and to Professor Maté for all the insights born with his clinical practice and enriching teachings.
Truly amazing, everything Dr. Gabor Mate said is 10000000000% true.
I have fibromyalgia and this is very true !
Thank you for showing the way to healing.
My goodness thank you 🙏 With abundant love light and solidarity 💜🙏🧚♂️☮️
I told myself that whatever bothered me as a young person will give me trouble now. I twisted my ankle in my teens and I am dealing with it now at 52. This may be a superficial , but I understand what he is saying. It all makes sense.
Magnificent gentleman, just brilliant 👏
I am raising a prenatally drug and alcohol exposed child with complex trauma and attachment issues. It's a hard life for this little guy and our whole family. You are saying the things I have learned about devastatingly, through the eyes of a child. I've created my RUclips channel to share our life and support other families on this path.
Oh my god the best speech ever. I have no words to thank you sir. Thank you very much
his calm voice is so soothing
He's incredible. Thank you Dr!
Brilliant man with a very important message
Dr gabbor your an inspiration I love you you give me so much strength
I really respect your work and am reading your book. It makes so much sense.Many blessings to you.😊🌸🦋🌟
I felt this Ted talk on a whole other level!! I grew up with my mom who was a heroine addict who would leave for weeks and months just to go on binges with her tweaker friends or boyfriend she had at the time! Watching her use drugs and my brother was the hardest thing that I have witnessed and no kid should grow up around it. Addiction is no fuckin joke and I watched it kill my mom and brother!!
Sorry to hear. What don’t break you make you stronger my brother in Humanity 💐 I send you Peace and Love 😊
@@TranquilityH ❤️
So correct you are Dr. Gabor!
Exercise, meditation, healthy diet and good sleep can help traumatized people.
...this can help just about anybody :)
More than that
DepthOfField How is that helping with emotion issues in the trauma?!🙃
its definitely part of the healing equation
Yes, bc you’re showing self love w those behaviors and it’s definitely a piece of the puzzle!!
It was really worth watching❤
Thank you Maestro :-)
Am so relieved after hearing that. Thank you
Dr. Gabor, You made a beautiful video about your thoughts on the current war in the middle East. I really wanted to share it with a friend but I can't find it on your channel. Many thanks and Blessings to you.🙏
I think he’s got it 100%
Thanks for sharing this
He literally spoke words about my life without ever knowing anything about me. Wow, best lecture I’ve heard.
I love what he's saying. Only thing I'm not keen on is how we're supposed to heal past wounds
realization of having self compassion that it was not your fault, of who you became. Healing can then begin
Listening to Dr Gabor Maté at the age of 67 makes me realise I never had a chance. Shocking emotional environment in utero. No one clever enough to realise I was fucked in the head as a child & teenager & get meaningful help for me (as if such was even available back then) The miracle is that people like me make it to 67. I was just not emotionally clever enough to realise the pity of my emotional poverty and kill myself. Now I'm too old to care - actually that's not right, I'm working under the delusion that meditation etc can make for a reasonable life. Maybe only someone with severe emotional damage could believe in such a Shangri-La.
As a child I was practically skinned alive with a rubber exercise cord - because I didn't do well in school - the beatings from my mother lasted up to 15yrs of age or more /
The trauma haunted me into my sleep - I'm now 67yrs of age - and the trauma has never left me..
Although, in spite of everything - I've done well - but I've been alone...
❤
Thank you very much doc
From the other side of world 🌍 egypt
Thanks for this video, he's great and I really like him🙏🌺
Just brilliant! Absolutely amazing! Thank you.
I’ve always said happy people don’t do drugs. Drugs are a way to temporarily escape your reality. You only want to do that if your realty sucks.
But those addictions don’t have to be drugs.
It’s a sense of trying to normalize.
😳 WoW! Words of Wisdom
Thank you for posting this it means so much to me