@@bobbob-vw4cc men like him: women should just be stay at home moms. Men are the providers. Career women would just die alone with pets. Also men like him: best I can do is 50 bucks and issues
The fact that he was telling her to spend more time with the children when she was talking about herself and not a single clip shows him being with his kids is just mind-blowing. The mother is not just a mother but also her own person with a life. Now I see this and remember my own parents. This kid will never have a memory with the father and the mother is frustrated.
@@MelaniaRose or it could just be the editing, these shows tend to over-exaggerate things (not saying there isn't a possibility he's not around much though)
Both parents should give attention to their kids, but the mother should be giving 80% of effort because that's her duty as a full-time housewife while the husband works his ass off to feed the family. If she chooses to work, who's taking care of the kids?
@@Waterbug1591 I think that's a very old-school stereotype generally. Should be up to the parents to decide how they divide roles and do that BEFORE they even have kids. But I can see how that is still seen as a traditional thing in Korea.
@@Khritter Ya I agree with you completely, I think the husband should swap roles with the wife, she seems to have a brighter career path than him. Men should be allowed to be househusbands cleaning the house, making sandwiches, doing laundry, washing dishes and looking after the kid. It's 2022, not 1960, strong women should financially support weak men, men should be allowed to participate in women's roles and women should pursue a high-paying career to prove that the social construct is a myth.
Hey guys this is really important I noticed something at 4:38 when the light was directed at the girl's right eye so I really hope if someone tries to reachs out to them to get her eye checked because there is a type of eye cancer that has the same symptôme when light is directed toward the eye. hopefully the girl has nothing but at least get her eye checked out . Please sepread this message
It's crazy how almost everyone here is putting the blame on the husband when he's working his ass off so that the wife doesn't have to. If you don't want to deal with kids, don't even get married and give birth. You don't get to regret later on because I swear if the husband were some sort of millionaire she would be more than happy to be a full-time housewife enjoying a luxurious lifestyle.
This is why you should talk about your expectations BEFORE marriage! Too many people get married and then are shocked when their partners want something different from what they want talk about what you want before marriage to see if your ideals align don’t wait until you are married with kids to do so!!
Joking right? You can lie or have other expectations once married. Personally, I'd be more controlling if I were married than just being in couple and living together. Bc once married, I'd have other worries.
It's not like there's a teacher to check if they've passed the expectations or not. She didn't get to study as promised. Main thing is taking time to know the person you marry.
They did tho, he agreed she'd go to post grad college after they got married and then it didn't happen. People lie, circumstances change, no matter how much you talk things out before marriage, nobody can see the future
@@mirroruniverse9331 yes,sometimes third people especially parents can see clearer and that doesn't mean they interfere in their children's life..but now she made the decision and have to take responsibility for that!!
It's really sad seeing women who are more competent than their husbands being limited in this way. And you just know that the reason he doesn't want her to go to school is because she would very easily in a very quickly find someone better than him. A lot of men admire women like her and she is just stuck in an unfortunate situation. I hope he at least wakes up and starts being more present for his children.
What you are saying is pretty naive "very quickly find someone better than him" Yeah no, it would be very hard for a mid 30s(?guess?) woman with 2 children to find a good man. Ask woman in a similar situation that has tried unsuccesfully (there are unfortunately many)
None of us truly know who's more competent, you can't reach that concusion by watching a 20 minute snippet. People are quick to take sides with the person they relate more with, whether it's race, age, gender, but there's nothing factual about that.
its def not easy being over 30 with kids being able to upgrade or find someone good lol have you seen how many women are struggling with that search community stats and posts it says diffrent to what ur reaching for
I thought he had some empathy towards her hard work until he threw in the line "I can't always get my way", and then it just got worse and obviously about his ego, not the family. This man better take it to heart this time and support her even stronger, as a team.
He is unappreciated, unhopeful and ungrateful man. If he knows how to say thank you or appreciated his wife. She will not regret marrying him and will work together for their family.
Right, its for his ego not for the families. If it really for the family and the kids he will grateful and thankful to his wife. She want to help her family that absolutely wanderfull. From what I see, it looks like his wife's job is just a side job that won't take much time and energy. That women really care about their child education, education is expensive the woman is aware of that. Both of them work using their muscles to work, They are not always young and strong to work. So its better to let the woman work and save money for the future
Bless the mum. It's written all over her face that she is feeling confined by her husband. She holds up the kids but she looks completely drained. Her dancing seems like moments of release and a chance for her to feel herself. I hope the family finds happiness and comes out of this overwhelming life. No one should be working 3 jobs, looking after two kids and the home.
Humans inherited sins. Single or double parents families, guardians, & grandparents don't teach their infants or toddlers to lie, steal food or toys, and to not admit their faults. When u were babies, u inherited sins cuz sin was passed down from our first human father, Adam. As we grow older, we sin more and our magnitude of sins grow more extreme. God doesn't allow sin in heaven. Therefore if you want to spend eternity on heaven after your life here on earth 🌎, you should believe in your heart ❤️ that Jesus Christ is your Savior. If you don't, you will miss going to heaven and end up in the lake of fire. It is terrible so I beg you to make the only correct decision for God to allow you to go to heaven. Jesus Christ is the only way to eternal life. 🙏 Have a nice day.
I don’t understand why men who can’t provide for the entire family and keeps struggling financially have the nerve to say I don’t want her to work, like what? You are not even rich or financially stable that’s why she has to work as well so she can provide for her kids. Men like that are so selfish
Men like that are not only selfish but also putting a back hold to their own selves from upgrading and growing as a person. Men like that are uncooperative and very rigid, reminds me a lot of my own south Asian dad🙃🙃🙃
@@SweetPlain Better life while raising her children; a happy and satisfied woman makes a good mother, not a resentful woman regretting her life, as too much resentment for a long time can put more pressure on her children.
@@SweetPlainsí, dignidad. Ella quiere trabajar para volverse a sentir digna como persona. El trabajo te da el sentido de ser útil, digno y traer el pan de comida a tus hermosos hijos. Lo sé porque lo viví. Lo que falla acá es la dinámica familiar, su salud mental la está pagando Cuidar a los niños y al mariño 24/7 es un trabajo más pero ella no tiene descanso ni vacaciones. Acá solo veo el machismo del esposo y en corea pasa muchísimo esto, si miras solamente las parejas de YT internacionales esto se repite siempre. Y después se divorcian. Corea recién se está abriendo al mundo y la mentalidad que una mujer puede trabajar y cuidar de sus hijos es algo poco aceptable. En LATAM también encontras estás situaciones
Brazilian here, a friend of mine moved to Korea during college and she got a boyfriend there. Months after the relationship he commented WHEN (he didn't even say if) when they get married she would have to stop working and studying to stay at home and take care of their children and HIM. She said it felt like she was meeting a man from the 1800's. They broke up a few days later.
That's how South Korea went from a third wolrd country dictatorship to a 1st world country superpower, by having traditional society values. Or korean maybe should become like the shithole where you come from, where cheating is a national sport, where you are destroying the amazon forest everyday, where degeneracy is pretty much your entire culture ? Brazilians and their third worlds counterparts should not give lessons to incredible countries like South Korea, just saying, stay in your lane.
It's not as simple as speaking a different language = can be a translator. If she doesn't have training, qualifications, work experience, just knowing a language doesn't mean anything to an employer.
@@bobbob-vw4cc Neither one of them spoke about their expectations before marriage. That being said, sh deserves way better. Mans is batting out of his league.
@@bobbob-vw4cc smart ppl are fooled by love all the time. A true measure of a person and their relationship choices is how long it takes to regret the choice you made out of love. It seems she started to regret pretty soon after moving. Just remember, HE was the one who wanted her to move, HE was the one who made the promises so that she would make that choice to move away from her loved ones into his. If you are doing all that and have no intention of fulfilling your own part of the deal, then he’s lucky all she has is regrets and hasn’t filled out divorce papers and left.
@@supremacy2040 no, if you are older you have to know better!! Before she knew what she really wanted from her life she decided to get married to another country not knowing the reality and without talking about her expectation!!...don't blame love for their irrisp8nsible attitude!!
This episode taught me a lot of things: 1. Being financial independent should be your first priority. Money isnt everything but you need money to survive and it makes life easier. 2. Follow your dreams first. Marriage and kids can come later. 3. Before marriage discuss your roles in the family and financial situation. If your partner disagrees l maybe you shouldn't get married until you both come to an agreement. 4. Get kids when you finally have financial stability and have done what you wanted to do: like studying, dancing. You can do it after kids but still it will be difficult. 5. Life never goes the way you planned.
If he was rich you would be saying something different because he would be her sugar daddy and she would be outside shopping with his hard earned money buying 500 dollar Gucci purses and you would be saying he should let her spend all of his money
@@mrbobbilly2 why would you assume something about some stranger like you know about them your whole life? That's quiet presumptuous. Also if you dont agree with me, just dislike the comment and go instead of being a troll.
Wow! I really admire the mom. She loves her kids so much that she even opened an account for them. I believe that hard work will pay off eventually. I think the wife and husband have to talk to each other and try to understand what both are going through. Don’t fight in front of kids too because this can affect them mentally when they grow up. I’m rooting for this family! I hope that they can earn lots of money considering the amount of dedication and perseverance they have!! Hwaiting!
Hey guys this is really important I noticed something at 4:38 when the light was directed at the girl's right eye so I really hope if someone tries to reachs out to them to get her eye checked because there is a type of eye cancer that has the same symptôme when light is directed toward the eye. hopefully the girl has nothing but at least get her eye checked out . Please sepread this message
@@ayaaissou7671 thank goodness someone else noticed this too. I messaged the channel moderator as soon as I saw it. Hopefully someone takes notice asap!
@@ayaaissou7671 i hope this was filmed recently so that it can be resolved. pls post this as a separate comment instead of a reply so that people can get it to top comment
It's mostly toxic females being the same female privilege and toxic masculinity they accuse other men of being. Literally 99% of comments are toxic to the father. This is depressing literally no woman here is capable of being a good mother or wife.
Giving a man or anyone financial power over you is a big mistake. My mom and dad separated their bank accounts because my dad didn’t like the way my mom handled money and my mom thought my dad was very controlling with money. He was a good dad but very old fashioned and even after everything was said and done he kept trying to tell my mom how to spend her income. Having your own means is always better. People change a lot when it comes money.
Even that will be not better for the family. If you're independent in every way and not rely or depend on the relation. I have seen most breakups in marriages are made by the ones who are financially independent. Because in that way you will not depend on your partner and thus it results in breaking of a relationship. I also agreed upon your story as well even that will also lead to the breakup. I'm so concern about how to depend on your partner in a good way so that you will care about the relation and don't struck the relation for money. It's really hard to figure out a midway
yes..that is true..my friend that is married complained to me that her husband didn't want her to work..but he only give small amount of money for groceries and shopping and that is not enough..my friend barely can buy clothes or anything that she want..
@@Cxs1a3 nice try, she said her friend’s husband didn’t want her to friend to work, he cannot provide but he wont ‘let’ his wife to work too, the fault is completely on him 😁
Second income is never hurt. Maybe just man’s pride that could hurt, but when u have a child to support, u gotta push over that pride and let the income come.
He doesn’t even give them proper money for groceries, like he doesn’t want to spend money on his wife and kids and doesn’t want her to work to make money, it’s very upsetting
If a woman makes more money than her husband, she loses respect for her husband and dictates the rules of the family because she's the breadwinner. However, it was stated very clearly that she is expected to fulfil her duty as a wife and mother, nurture your own damn kids instead of dreaming to have a career and sacrificing your time with your kids. Dumb ass modern women choose career over motherhood and become single leftover women, then they cry about it or adopt 5 cats. LOL
This should be a lesson for every women. Never give up your financial independence to be a stay at home wife. What are you going to do if your husband cheat and you can't leave because you don't have money? So many men want to play the role of an "alpha male" or a "father figure" but if an opportunity present it self, they would leave you for someone else and you're left to pick up the pieces of what he left
Так большинство женщин получают образование и строят карьеру. Ничего, все успевают. А к вам едут из нищих стран и бедных решионов,подбирают шваль,на которых хангуеи не посмотрят. Старый, нищий мужик, еще и жадный. На фига он нужен? Какая мать рада таклму зятю? Это позо для корейца. Я-женщина, я могу содержать себя,своего ребенка, родителей, а жтот только детей делает. Это позор для мужика
A lot of men do work and support their whole families and they don’t cheat or act irresponsibly. This is a problem not so much of gender yet of individuals.
@@jm7578 us ladies already know that it's "not all men", but most women who are watching have had negative experiences with me. For me, I dated a hobosexual for 10 years who never got a job the entire time, my dad would always be controlling of me, my single male friends would always "fall in love with me" and cause drama when I only wanted a platonic relationship, ect.
8:52 - I don't know how this guy did it but I'm a 37 guy and if I was sitting next to that woman as her husband, I would be crying, hugging and begging for her forgiveness. One more thing, if you can't provide enough financially, at least be more compassionate, attentive, loving, etc. Don't act dumb or emotionless.
I don't know it either. But then when you look at life, a lot of people don't get what they deserve, good or bad. It's bizarre to see how undeserving people get better than what you have
Most dudes would apologize and assure them that they made the right decision, but I guess all that's all he could do. I can't imagine being in her situation.
It must be hard to be that vulnerable when you have a camera in front of your face. But then again we're so used to seeing that because of "reality" drama filled tv shows.
Yep. Gender roles are deep in the korean society. I saw a woman and she broke her arm and her husband still forced her to cook. Sje cried and was struggling
@@CanopusLux Time out, so you think if she was a man, she (now he) would be given time off? It'd be no different if she was a man. So there is no gender roles there, only gender equality, you just contradicted yourself.
@Lamou Lamou if men except women stay at home then he should earn enough money for his family but in this case he dont so that why the wife have to earn money too
I see that the mom cares more about the children than the dad. The fact that she thought of their financial future is just so thoughtful and way ahead of her husband.
There's a way to not suffer, not be in danger, not be poor, not get hurt, not have to work in vain, not have to feel any kind of negative vibe, & not to be disrespected anymore by anyone. Imagine you will be invincible, immortal, and holy with a new, upgraded body. Imagine everyone around you will be the same as you without ranking/hierarchy. Isn't that a delightful thought? It's true you or anyone can have eternal life. All you got to do is to accept Jesus Christ 🙏 as your Savior! Once you do, He will let you into heaven during your day when you finally see Him!
My mom and grandma always told me, be educated, get a job where you can support yourself, date a generous man with a good job and strong work ethic, stay hot and confident, or stay single
I’m left speechless, she may not be completely aware but she is a victim of domestic abuse. Holding her financially hostage, and using his male privilege to manipulate her is so sickening. She was scammed into marrying this man-child. I hope she finds help in Korea for domestic abuse and leaves that abusive man.
That’s the father of her child. She’s not going to leave. And go where? Her dad died. Think realistically. It’s not that deep. I think she was young and naive and got wrapped up in him. She let him take over her life. She didn’t put her foot down enough and got caught up in this life. She let life happen to her. She’s not happy with the life she chose but it’s her choice in the end
I don’t blame her. He knew exactly what he was doing. Because she’s a foreigner he thought she’d be easy to tame and control considering she has no money and education. What kind of husband says to come out of work and focus on kids? It would be one thing if he was rich and could provide for family of 4. He’s in NO position to say that to her. He’s just want her out of work to boost his ego and feel like an “Alpha male”💀🤡 So sad and heartbreaking. She thought about her daughters future way ahead of time which her husband couldn’t do and with husband like that she needs to think way ahead for better future for her kids. I can’t stand this guy. I hope she divorces him for good.
@Moon Bae I could’t reply because you deleted your reply but yeah I understand what you’re saying. I do and I agree divorce is not always the solution.But in this situation you can see he thinks she don’t care enough for the kids. They both work but somehow she needs to look after the kids more..like huh?? He broke the promise as well. Running 4 member household with £50 allowance that he thinks is enough, working to get money, looking after 2 kids and one man child..if she wants to go have a little fun and do job that pays “nothing” to her..god forbid he should let her have it for her own sanity. This poor woman is over working.
@J P feminist ideology. I am a kpop fan 😂 I will go to south Korea 😂 I will get married and I will change another country ideology like in my country 😂if she doesn't like she can divorce and start working hard. Ah But this is Korea when a woman is old, fat and ugly more difficult.
As someone who wants to live alone my whole life, it is always surprising to me than people prefer bad relationship to being alone. I choose living alone over anything else
Omg after watching this couple's videos I can say that I'm grateful for the advices of my parents. "Study, get yourself a job you love and make your own money. Never depend on a partner financially, always have your own bag because you never know". I feel sorry for this lady, this guy is restraining her and she is not even fully aware of it 😢
4:44 Idk if they're reading the comments, but healthy eyes are supposed to flash red, but her's flashes white here. My sister's eye did this in our photos as well and when we had her checked, she ended up having retinoblastoma.
“Promises” we’re NOT broken. It CAN BE DONE. Husband just refuses to let wife go to grad school because he too knows how successful his wife would be. He’s selfish and can’t see past her becoming great. He can step up to be a stay at home father when she goes to school or when she works. IT’S DOABLE. Everything he’s saying are just excuses to prolong her being a SAHM.
@@GandalftheWise I really hate idiots like you who still think women lifes are just about being a stay mom raising kids and then dying really women can still be successful and be moms too
@@GandalftheWise i didn't know that a woman's only purpose in life is to be a child-bearing machine, thank you kind sir for enlightening me! (/s) ugh just shut up.
@@tribui3252 when it’s something only a woman can do, it’s expected that it becomes a true purpose. sure you can slave away for a corporation that can easily replace you if that’s what you value over raising a family.
This is one of the reasons why I refuse to give up working unless I marry very well off and receive investments, property in my name. The sadness in her eyes says everything. I refuse to struggle like this
Finally seeing the true nature of cultural issue of korean mens. Im reading alot of shared experience dating or marrying korean mens and most of the things they shared is especially if your marrying them is that you have to set things straight from the start to them. Meaning better tell them your plans for work or your career wise and tackle the money issue. At least from the start if they disagree you already have an idea what kind of guy your dealing with.
Hey guys this is really important I noticed something at 4:38 when the light was directed at the girl's right eye so I really hope if someone tries to reachs out to them to get her eye checked because there is a type of eye cancer that has the same symptôme when light is directed toward the eye. hopefully the girl has nothing but at least get her eye checked out . Please sepread this message
@@liquidswordfish nah , i have to correct you with all due respect . No , not all asian men thinks this way . With the new and upcoming generation we dont all think like that . Me and my male friends love cooking , this is what i would see as a stereotype in what foreigners thinks about us . I would LOVE my lady being successful in what she really does . What my male friends would like was the same as me. Maybe i grew up in Singapore so we do share quite a realistic approach or having the non traditional asian “ culture” because simply Singapore’s standards of living is too high for one men to tank the whole family 😅😂 But , with my experience for all to read , Asian men are not all like these XD it also depends on where they come from and how their family inculcate their culture on them, especially from young. For me and my friends , we are born in 2000 so … we just think that these sterotypes that men should only work or even cooking is an insult are literally bullshit 😂
@@joejackson6227 hello sir i am talking about south asian...which means india,pakistan and begladesi ...not whole asia ..i know them how they are ..its in culture and 99 percent are like that anyways you from singapore well i saw while in singapore how 99 percent of men carry their wives bags i assume how you guys are, its not bad but in singapore case i felt it is more female dominated unlike malaysia...and by the way i have never seen so much money hungry singaporean girl beside korean, i felt sorry for singaporean guys whose girl or wife treat them like shit just because they lack money...so i guess its time to man up huh..can or no ...can can 😂😂
Honestly this marriage reminds me of my parents' abusive marriage. My mom's parents also disapproved of her marrying my dad. My mom was the main breadwinner but also the one taking care of me and my siblings. When she found my dad had a mistress at his work, she quit her job out of anger- BIG mistake on her part. My dad became the breadwinner while my mom was reduced to just a housewife. When she tried to go back to work, he would belittle, gaslight, and manipulate her to discourage her from working even though we desperately needed the money since his money was not enough to sustain us. Many abusers are narcissists and my dad is one; he wanted to be the hero of the family. The one who gets to say "look at me, I'm working so hard to feed to you while you're just having fun at home with the kids". And the sad thing is everyone outside the family believes him. Luckily my mom is a strong woman and she's working hard for her Masters so she can return to work and divorce my dad. Ladies, it is important that you be financially independent! Or else there may come a day when you're treated like a housewife or- in the case for abusive marriages - a house servant. Edit: Since a few of you have been taking my words about being a housewife out of context, I want to clarify I am not belittling that role. But imagine that you are a woman with a successful job. You're able to buy whatever you want without anyone's permission or having to beg to borrow money. You are also a wonderful mother. You work 12 hours every day while your husband watches TV all day. Every night, you come home to do your household duties including cook dinner, help kids with homework, serve your husband, bathe the kids, etc. Next day - repeat it all. One day, you quit your job because you find out your husband has been spending your hard-earned money on his mistress. Now your husband is the breadwinner which leaves him in control of all finances. Since you have no job anymore, you're only a "housewife". Why the quotation marks? Because in the context of the situation, your husband treats you more like a house servant even though your role is called "house wife". Remember you are an immigrant without a job. You have no friends or family to help you out- only your physically and mentally abusive husband who controls all finances. "Go wash the dishes" , "cook me dinner right now", "wash my laundry", etcetc - you have to obey every command OR ELSE. You think Cinderella had it tough? My mom had it worse. She loved her job and I can see in the comments below that many of you guys can relate to wanting to be more than a housewife. For many women like my mom, their JOB is their pride. It's fine to be a housewife but you need to understand not every woman wants that role. As I explained below, nobody likes to be demoted to a job they never intended to be stuck with. But just because you don't want the job that doesn't mean you're belittling it or those who have it. It's simply a job you don't want, and for my mom who once made a LOT of money in her career, being a house servant with the label of "housewife" is a huge step down for her. Now she has to beg my dad for money to buy necessities like groceries. Please read my words in the context of the situation I have provided you. Now tell me, in her ABUSIVE situation, do you think it's okay for her to be "just a housewife"? It is incredibly hard for a woman to be "just a housewife" when she is in an abusive relationship with a man who holds her life (and her children's) in the palm of his hand. So please do not put words in my mouth and say I'm belittling housewives when I have only the highest respect for women like my mom who have to slave away in the house. Edit 2: For EXTRA clarification since some people are still misconstruing my words - It is NOT fine to be just a "housewife" for an abusive husband. It is NOT fine to have to beg for money to feed your children. It is NOT fine to be treated like a slave instead of an equal. Abused women CANNOT afford to be only a "housewife" because that leaves them at their abuser's mercy. They need financial independence aka a job in order to have the means to escape the abuse. However! If you are NOT in an abusive marriage then it IS perfectly fine to be a housewife if that's what a woman wants. Whatever role makes you happy then go for it. But obviously a "housewife" with an abusive husband would NOT have that opportunity and I already explained why. Honestly, the fact some people here think I'm talking about regular housewives when my whole context specifically revolves around ABUSED housewives really speaks volumes of your privilege and I am appalled. I hope you will never know what it's like to be a "housewife" for an abusive husband. For those of you below who have commented your experience and how you relate a lot to my comment as an abused housewife yourself, I'm so sorry you've had to suffer like that. I hope one day you find the means to escape your situation and improve your life.
The problem here is not that she was the breadwinner because sometimes women get better jobs than men. The problem is that she stayed after finding out he cheated on her. That must psychologically affect her. Money is not going to fix a toxic marriage. She should have left him the minute she found out. Its sad how we as women make excuses for men inorder to protect the family.
@@Katarina23 Yes, I asked my mom why quit your job and stay with a cheater? My mom said she did not want dad to be happy with his mistress. It angered me because my siblings and I had to endure years of physical and mental abuse because, by quitting her job, my mom left us completely at his mercy. Though I know she regrets it because she too had to suffer with us. She also said she didnt divorce him also because as an immigrant she had nobody else and was scared to raise 3 kids all by herself. It's hard to escape a bad marriage when you have kids and are a foreigner.
I hope she understands that once she gets her masters and a high paying job and *then* tries to get a divorce, she might end up being the one paying him alimony and child support if the kids are young. She needs to divorce first and get everything settled.
@@XactlyCeSe1 Thankfully my siblings and I are adults now although none of us have a stable or high paying job. We carry a lot of trauma and went through a lot of struggle because of decades of abuse that we're still finishing our degrees. Recently my older siblings were diagnosed with schizophrenia, so my mom is now relying on me to get a high paying but stable job so that we can leave dad and I'll take over as the main breadwinner. My mom is old now so, even with a degree, she likely won't be able to work for many more years. Sad to say she wasted her prime years acting as her husband's house servant. So please, any lady reading this - have some self respect and be as financially independent as possible! Even if your relationship seems perfect right now, you never know how circumstances might change. My dad was kind to my mom for the first few years, but that's how they lure you in. Once children come into the picture, your marriage will either change for the better... or worse.
I would recommend the book “Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982” for those of you that enraged by this video. It is very eye opening, and it is written following a woman’s life from her birth until she becomes a housewife. Reminds me a bit of this situation.
Yes the book was a difficult pill to swallow for the male Koreans I support the writer who wrote that book to portray the inequalities of the Korean society
@@Squirrel3174 The book is statistically backed and not "feminazi" in any way. Plus, the author is not even a "feminazi," and people should stop creating words with "Nazi." It completely downplays the horrors of World War 2. What the Nazis did is incomparable to the so-called "feminazi" movement. The movement we should be discussing is the strong anti-feminist movement amongst milennial Korean men. When Irene from Red Velvet recommended "Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982," her so-called male fans posted videos of them tearing and burning up her pictures while cursing her. This book is important, because it portrays discrimination and hardships that many Korean women went through. It tells the harsh truth about being a woman in South Korea. Why is the author being villainised when she is simply against gender inequality? Gender discrimination and s*xual harassment is a MASSIVE issue in South Korea. Why don't you focus your energy on bringing attention to that?
sigh... this is just sad bc she deserves much better ! she's quite talented and intelligent, I hope that she can get a job in a field she enjoys + pays well bc her I know for sure she should not be taking her loser husband's advice. I understand they're both stressed but he should be encouraging her to help instead of forcing her into a purely housewife role when they barely can support themselves on one income. Like I said on the last video, her late father was probably right to have disapproved of her moving away and marrying this man and I'm sure she knows that better than anyone.
They can work together and help together for household expenses, childrens and health check up/hospitalization just in case of medical emergencies, and the husband, he should be thankful for his wife and much appreciated for her genuine love for them. But he seems ungrateful and unhopeful man.
Why is he a loser? He had a good job and he lost it and they wont hire him due to his age. Is your job guaranteed or do you think every country provides a 401k?
Loser was a bit much people have different outlooks in life. You're right about them talking about instead of clashing like this. Don't have to call her husband a loser when he clearly still loves her.
@@Katarina23 I'm not saying he's a loser because he was made redundant from his job or really anything about his job security. It's about his attitude, he leaves essentially all of the child-rearing responsibilities to her and on top of that is reluctant to give her an allowance so she can buy things for the kids (not even for herself). If money is such an issue he needs to put patriarchal values aside and encourage her to find a better paying job so she can help out financially instead of having the burden of a single income household. Not to mention he questioned her abilities to take care of the children and asked her to 'focus more on them', as if she isn't the only one who actually ensures they are well fed, clothed and in school on time etc. That's loser behavior to me so I said what I said!
Women get your degrees!!! I remember since I could speak my mom hammered that into my brain day in and day out. She's obviously such a talented woman and I believe she could honestly excell if she went back to school. But now she has to think of the kids and how they're going to raise them so its hard. Children can be a blessing but they can also bring about feelings of regret and bitterness. Sometimes parents know best...its not that they don't want to see us happy but often times they've gone through things that they don't want us to go through.
woman in Africa, specifically my country, the woman here are studying with bursaries, and they are married with 3 or 4 kids. She will be better of studying, getting her degree and getting the hell out of that deadbeat marriage. She will be so much better off earning her own living, plus she wi be a good example for her daughters.
Yes & also keep working with the degree you earn!! My mom got her degree but then she stopped working for a while when we moved to the US. When she fought with my dad she felt trapped bc it was harder to leave with no income lined up :( Thankfully she has found a job now & their relationship is much better from it tbh
She has a degree and said in another video that she could do other work, but once children came into the picture she needed a flexible schedule so she had to take odd jobs and small part time work.
It's not about getting degrees it's about getting a husband that supports the wife and doesn't put all the responsibility of caring for the children on the wife. Mothers almost always give up their careers because their husbands think caring for the children is a mom's job when it should be both.
Now that I’m older I understand how important it is to be financially independent. Always keep that in my the next time you think of giving up your studies/job/career/good opportunities … for the sake of someone else.
I'm from Philippines, not a rich country, but I'm educated here, working and somehow living a good, middle class life. Once there was a Chinese man in Australia, wanted me to live with him there and have a family. I didn't accept because I have more dreams like this girl. But I didn't get manipulated because I didn't believe that the man would send me to graduate school. I don't want to have children yet. I believe once I got pregnant, like this man, all of those false promises will never happen. I trusted my guts and I'm firm to my principle that a woman should be financially independent and must not depend on someone, especially a man, to get her out of her bad life situation like poverty etc. I must do it myself so I don't owe anyone
If I was her I would get a job no matter what he says. She needs to be financially independent. Every woman should. Not only that but what if he loses his job, they would have no income then.
@@lester2162 Ya I agree with you completely, I think the husband should swap roles with the wife, she seems to have a brighter career path than him. Men should be allowed to be househusbands cleaning the house, making sandwiches, doing laundry, washing dishes and looking after the kid. It's 2022, not 1960, strong women should financially support weak men, men should be allowed to participate in women's roles and women should pursue a high-paying career to prove that the social construct is a myth.
@You need a medic YOU SPOT ON BRO, I yearn for the day when women will fully accept a stay-at-home man to prove that the equality they've been fighting for is feasible. The reality is however, when a woman makes more money she WOULD NOT respect her man the same way she would respect him if he earned MORE than her. It's crazy.
My dad did this to my mom and then they had divorce. My mom struggled bad to raise me up now I am working and things are bit calm ..few days back she told me never drop your financial independence no matter how secure or trustworthy guy you get ..financial independence is your wing ❤
God will bless you and her 🙏. Keep it up ❤ Life is unpredictable and fragile...it's ok to worry cuz as humans we don't live in a perfect, secured society. Have u thought about whether u go 2 heaven or hell after this life? Cuz life is short & fragile. Look at how many peeps die each day...but there's hope... Fortunately there's a way to not suffer, not be in danger, not be poor, not get hurt, not have to work in vain, not have to feel any kind of negative vibe, and not to get tired anymore. Imagine you will be invincible, immortal, and holy with a new, upgraded body. Imagine everyone around you will be the same as you. Imagine everyone will respect each other. Isn't that a delightful thought? It's true you or anyone can have such a perfect, eternal life. All you got to do is to accept Jesus Christ 🙏 as your Savior! Once you do, He will let you into heaven during your day when you finally see Him!
My mother can sadly not leave him, she can‘t find a job anymore at her age and she suffers badly. Our entire family suffers under our narc father who made her stop working nearly 30 years ago. I hope we can be free some day
I really advise all women to be financially independent. No one would want to manipulate and abuse you even further cuz you're capable of standing up for yourself. Narcissists don't like that.
yup..but right now I just being fired from my job after over two years working there..I cry so hard..I do want to get married and have kids..but suddenly I lost my job..I am women..no men want women that don't work..
@@bella8145-d9z Hey, how are you now? Do you have any backup plan in mind? If not, you can start reevaluating your goals. You don't have to succumb to pressure in getting married and having kids. Do your own pace :) It is okay to start over. I'm hoping all the best for you.
@@btsmochimi7924 thankfully I have save a lot during my time working there..but need to find other job fast..but my company and my boss is also toxic..sometimes I feel glad that I am not working there anymore but it is hard to get a job nowadays
@@bella8145-d9z This is true but the thing is men want women who work at the time of meeting them and then expect them to quit for them in the future after marriage, while dating of course you need your own job. I think this is the issue with this type of relationship, the fact that you will quit when they ask you is an ego boost.
It warmed my heart to see her saving money for her daughters! Like what is it that women can't do?? She gave birth to them + loves them + takes care of them + performs and saves money for them! She's such a good person!! But one income is not something you should depend on. She should try teaching those multiple languages in an institute! I was raised by a working mother, I turned out fine. She's a great mom, her kids will turn out fine too! Go and get a full time job! 💜💜 You're doing great! Don't depend on your husband and his limiting beliefs.
Sheesh he never shows any emotions at all and looks so repressed, like he’s hiding something. For all the girls who think they should go to Korea and find a husband because they think Korean men are perfect, let this be a WARNING.
Same worldwide 🌐. 😅 Men are men especially the older generation born in da 50s, 60s, and 70s. Traditional narrow minded men from that boomer gen are ummm #sussy #mentallyill
Hey guys this is really important I noticed something at 4:38 when the light was directed at the girl's right eye so I really hope if someone tries to reachs out to them to get her eye checked because there is a type of eye cancer that has the same symptôme when light is directed toward the eye. hopefully the girl has nothing but at least get her eye checked out . Please sepread this message
Yes moms are amazing. Nowadays younger dads are becoming increasingly amazing too! It's just the older, more narrow-minded, more selfish men who are the problematic parasites in the marriages 😅
I have watched all three clips. It reminds me that no matter how romantic and wonderful a relationship looks like in K dramas or any dramas,it actually just a trick or a propaganda to encourage marriages and improve birth rates for countries’ future labour.And young women like us are vulnerable to these “sugar coated bombs”.Like all the fairytales end up with “they live happily ever after”,it never shows the hard part of maintaining marriage,supporting family and much less the pain of labor. Let’s be realistic and independent.People and life are more complicated than they looks like in a drama or a movie. Do not let the “love scenes”blind your eyes and make decisions depending on emotions. Do not rush into committing a relationship and a marriage when you or your partner are not ready.
God is love ❤. He will offer eternal life after this life. There's a way to not suffer, not be in danger, not be poor, not get hurt, not have to work in vain, not have to feel any kind of negative vibe, & not to be disrespected anymore by anyone. Imagine you will be invincible, immortal, and holy with a new, upgraded body. Imagine everyone around you will be the same as you without ranking/hierarchy. Isn't that a delightful thought? It's true you or anyone can have eternal life. All you got to do is to accept Jesus Christ 🙏 as your Savior! Once you do, He will let you into heaven during your day when you finally see Him!
She can speak 5 languages. Let her get a job where she can work from home. Be a translator, or a tour guide. She's super talented. Don't waster your life away waiting for something to happen. Be happy please. You both are truly blessed with true love (that's why you both got married in the first place) and 2 beautiful, healthy daughters. Make happiness happen. Wishing you both the best!
The valuable lesson that my mom taught me is to never quit my job. I did not listen and i quit my job so i can join my partner overseas. he then became ill and had to quit. Thank goodness i was able to get a job again after being unemployed for a couple of years. I was incredibly lucky to get back to my career when a lot of people didnt have the chance. That's why ladies, dont rely on a man's promise that he'll take care of you.. some unexpected things might happen.
When I first laid my eyes on the title, I automatically knew the marriage was a big hot red flag. The husband deprived the wife of her financial abilities just so he could show his pride and have his masculine ego. Its so obvious that the wife looks depressed and drained. He is abusive and wicked. Plus, the wife could probably earn more money if she worked. This is just outrageous and I feel so uncomfortable knowing that she just scammed herself into such a toxic environment. Worse part is, since she has kids now, its going to be way more difficult to leave him. I really pray she gets out of this marriage and live happier.
All korean men have a mind 1800 Because their parents think that way They follow in their parents' footsteps Their parents, who follow the thinking of 1800, are the ones who force their children to blindly obey, so you find a young man in his twenties or thirties saying that the woman is in the home, obeying her husband, pregnancy and childbirth, and the most important thing is to serve my parents. Rather, the words of his parents, because from his childhood he was raised by his parents, the old generation that follows retrograde customs and traditions from the 1800s. The child’s brain is washed from his childhood with these ideas, and he applies them to his future wife This is not the incitement of his parents against him and their incitement against him in any decision he takes
The mother reminds me of mine..she sacrificed so much for love, her husband and their children. Just like the lady here, my mom also saved every little extra she had in a dedicated savings account. I have not touched a cent of the amount in there. I will pay it forward to my own children one day. And I will cherish and honor my mom more, while she’s still around.
She’s way out of his league. She’s an attractive intelligent talented woman and a great mother. Like bro you couldn’t have asked for a better wife appreciate her instead of criticizing her when you’re doing the bare minimum. She deserves better
This is why I refuse to stop working. Had that happen to me for less than 6 months and I can't even buy myself soda or chips. It's exhausting to work full time and be a full time parent but it's more exhausting to feel helpless stuck at home.
Share custody or give the father primary custody then you get to be the "cool parent". The problem with women is that they forget that children have a FATHER and a mother, give him the kids and make HIM take care of them fulltime. We're not Virgin Mary, that child has a human father lol.
She looked so tired and lifeless at the table and in the filming. i hope things are better. I hate when ppl get married men expect the wife give up 100% of themself, while men give up nothing or just a little bit. You never want to be the reason your partner is stagnant. You’re suppose to help each other grow to be the best person/parent you guys can be together🥲
The husband is giving up nothing? Dude works so hard everyday and barely gets time to relax . You make it sound like he's out there drinking and partying while his wife is providing enough for a family of four. He could 100 percent do better but it's unfair to say that he's given up nothing and she's the only one trying her best.
But he’s unhappy too?? All he does is work, work, work… he wishes he could be at home with his wife and daughters and he can’t because he has to provide for them
The man give nothing??? What are you an idiot??? He's working his ass off all day long to provide for his family, he even got badly injured while doing his job... you bunch of retard biased feminists know nothing about real life .
@@schwabschwab1842 Agree, initially I thought he didn't try hard at work but it seems he's doing the best he can delivering ice cream n at least that is commendable. Not everyone can be a high flyer n earn big bucks, what matters is giving his best n hopefully in time finds a better paying job. As long he's not spending it on smoking, gambling, womanizing n alcohol like some men do..
@@soulwinner247 He's literally controlling her finances. He won't let her have access to her own money and only gives her an incredibly small allowance that can barely cover the grocery bill and clothing for her children. That is literally financial abuse. Also he isn't contributing anything. He barely takes care of the children too (in the first part he gave his child food that could have landed her in the hospital because she has a some sort of food disease). So not only is she working multiple jobs, she is being financially abused by her husband, and she is the one doing most of the work taking care of their children.
I've had some guys tell me that "oh your just mad because your alone and that you think making a world a better place and being in a relationship is a waste of time". Honestly I enjoy my peace and tranquility.
It's scientifically documented that single women who never got married and don't have kids are the healthiest and happiest in the population. Married women live shorter lives than unmarried women. For men, it's the opposite, unmarried men live shorter lives, are more depressed, less happy than married men. Men want women to want to marry and have kids. They shame those who don't want to because it serves their best interest when more women want kids and marriage. Men treat women like objects that can serve them in some way. So many men never stop seeking greener pasture even after marriage. They just know they want kids and they know most women will never abandon their kids so they get her pregnant, exhaust her youth and beauty before leaving her for someone who hasn't bear the burden of having and caring for his kids. It's not worth it to get married and have kids for 50% divorce rate and 8 years average marriage length. Make your own money, get rich, stay single, stay unburdened, untraumatized, and unaffected by this patriarchal society.
Some races are incompatible with east asians. Only europeans can fit into east asian culture. N vice versa. Coz both races have high iq. Rest of the races could be very harmful. South asians,south east asians,africans. It has been in germany. Lots of bad stuff. I dont wanna go deep in that.
@@tmtmtm520 Actually it happens in countries with a history of different groups of people too. Well more particularly, the countries built as European colonies taking over land that belonged to the people who live there before, the natives. Look at the history of the U.S.A. - the colonists sailed over from England and set up a colony, they eventually grew in number and decided to get rid of British rule and established a free nation, then they fought wars with the native Americans and wiped out many and forced them to live in certain areas, they brought over slaves from Africa and got rich from cotton and tobacco etc. using the unpaid labor of slaves. And then they kept black people in check with laws after slavery was abolished. When waves of immigrants came into the U.S. they also faced discrimination and sometimes violence - for example the Chinese laborers, then the Japanese agricultural workers (sugarcane cutting is why Hawaii has so many Japanese descendents). Eastern European and Southern European (e.g. Italians) immigrants faced a lot of discrimination as well. Then Mexican immigrants and workers in southwestern U.S.A., then Vietnamese and Koreans aftee the Vietnam War and Korean War brought refugees, war brides and economic migrants. Then immigrants with more education from India and South Asia who took IT jobs. The U.S. has a very long history of immigrants from all parts of the world, and yet issues of discrimination have not gone away - yes, they're much better than in the past, but racial politics is still a very sore spot there. Meanwhile South Korea used to a country where people left as migrants to go to other countries. And it's only recently become a "wealthy" developed country where people from poorer countries want to move to, to work and to live. So the history of Korean contact with foreigners in Korea is very short. Would this woman have gone to live in Korea during the 80s? When people were forced to keep quiet and avoid criticizing the government, when wealthy factory owners would ignore safety rules and force bad conditions upon workers, when the military would crack down on civil protests or demonstration by shooting them, when police would beat up ordinary people if they even suspected them of anything, when there were night curfews and military controlled everything? Yes, Korea is a very homogeneous country. And that's a factor in their difficulty accepting different people. But we also need to look at their history and lack of contact until quite recently.
Frankly it's not as bad as people make out when you consider that nobody was going to South Korea just 40 years ago. Look up some videos about 1980s Korea. The people were still mostly poor, and a brutal military dictatorship was in control of the country. Don't forget that the country was rebuilding from the extreme poverty and devastating effects of the war with the Communist North (the Korean War). By the 90s standards of living had improved but you could still see a lot of poverty in the nation. Then they suffered the IMF crisis and gradually rebounded from that. So the building up of living standards and wealth to what you see now, is fairly recent if you think about it. Koreans in their 50s and 60s would still remember how things were in the 80s when they were kids. Anyway it's only recently that Korea has had the money that would attract people from poorer countries. Before that, Korea WAS one of those poorer countries - in fact, a very poor one. So foreigners coming in and living there (as opposed to staying there for a few years like the many Americans and other English speakers who teach there, or work for companies, or the U.S. Department of Defence employees) is really really new. As new as Korea's new wealth and modernity. It's a very short time for people who had previously lived in a sealed-off all-Korean world for most of their history.
This is what exactly also happens to Korean married couples when especially wives don't have their own jobs. I personally want to say it’s trace of patriarchalism that still heavily lingers on Korean society, and it can even link to domestic violence, given my personal experience.
@@lua-user you should be happy Korean society survives in progressive societies no one has kids and those societies slowly disappear because of selfish women who want career
I don't know why she married him...he don't have good looks nor have money and more important he don't even have good heart who support her wife and family😒..she deserves better than this
That's why people should learn to love themselves every day than to set for so low. She knows 5 languages, has many interests and had plans to get a college graduation but instead she's with that guy, she'd go far without him
The one area where he obviously fell short was in supporting her when she wanted to work...but he is likely also thinking of the children's welfare & the importance of having 1 parent around. Looks are a really superficial way of determining if someone is a suitable partner, and as much as one person might value it there's no reason why that should be the 'standard' that every person seeking a spouse should bow to. He clearly had a fairly well-paying job when they got married, given that he worked in a semiconductor company until not long ago when retrenchment came his way, and he isn't bumming around but working to financially support his family, so I don't understand the logic of most of this comment.
Did you even watch the video? He had a good job in semiconductors, that's computers. It's not ok to body shame women, but somehow it's ok to body shame men, that's why there will never be "gender equality".
I want to give her my warmest hug. She is the definition of supermom. I can’t even imagine doing what she’s doing, that’s a lot to juggle. 아이고 이거 눈물난다 ㅠㅠ
Hi, I’m a Neurology resident from Germany, and I think the older daughter might possibly have Retinoblastoma. At 4:44, there’s a typical sign where the pupils appear white when exposed to light. I would recommend having her eyes checked by an ophthalmologist if it hasn’t already been done. I hope I’m wrong, and that she and her family are healthy. Please make the family know, @K-DOC. Thanks.
And they always blackmail women with "too late". There's no too late. They just want you to rush in and make the same mistakes they made because they don't want to be the only ones suffering while you're unburdened because you don't have a husband and kids.
@Riya exactly. Who is he to "allow" his wife to make choices. If she needs permission from her husband to do the same things she could freely do before marriage, then 100 times better being single
I felt her.. she knows now and she is doing her best to give something to her kids, she is amazing for sure, I admire her and I would like to know how is she doing, we have little yet I would love to send something to their kids, just to share our little too, there was a time when we had a hard period an a random mom send me a small package with cute stuff for kids, she said "we have little, we can share very little but I hope you feel this beautiful warm feeling", I felt it and when we were doing better I send her a small package too with a "thankyou".
That was so rude of him to insinuate that she doesn't care about her kids wtf what kind of husband says "you need to start paying attention to the kids" while she literally works three jobs so the kids can go to college , cooks, cleans and teaches them.
Humans inherited sins. Single or double parents families, guardians, & grandparents don't teach their infants or toddlers to lie, steal food or toys, and to not admit their faults. When u were babies, u inherited sins cuz sin was passed down from our first human father, Adam. As we grow older, we sin more and our magnitude of sins grow more extreme. God doesn't allow sin in heaven. Therefore if you want to spend eternity on heaven after your life here on earth 🌎, you should believe in your heart ❤️ that Jesus Christ is your Savior. If you don't, you will miss going to heaven and end up in the lake of fire. It is terrible so I beg you to make the only correct decision for God to allow you to go to heaven. Jesus Christ is the only way to eternal life. 🙏 Have a nice day.
And that, my dear sisters, is the lesson to be learned here! Be productive and independent, cultivate hobbies and social life outside of your husband and children. As the other half of a transnational marriage, I could not understand how two people form a union without discussing important topics like career, children, integration/assimilation, etc. I knew that language proficiency, education and work come first before children. The longer you stay in your partner's country, the higher the expectation of your language proficiency. But, this is just me...
I walking outside when suddenly a pregnant woman approached me and said "do you study? Do you work?" I told her yeah i study in college then she said "whatever you do work and earn money don't depend on a man because he won't provide the things you want" then proceeded and said "you see I'm pregnant and my husband doesn't give me enough money to take care of myself"
He promised her, and he broke it. It sounded like they did have that prep talk before marriage. But why is he sending her off to grad school? Shouldn’t she go herself? Unless she meant he is either paying or will help pay for it. My dad does this to my mom so I hate things like this. If you make an agreement prior to marriage, keep it. What does she even see in this guy? With her ability, wouldn’t she bring in more $$?? Who knows. I wish better for her.
Actually, no, without him she'd still be in Uzbekistan, so she would be making less than even a poor Korean, even is she made above average salary. Westerners find this difficult to understand, cuz they live in a priviliged environment where different races get paid somewhat equally, that's not the case in the rest of the world. Koreans get paid literally like 10x what Central Asians get paid for the same job.
Look at how amazing she is doing with those girls. Why in the world would she want to leave them? Just get a side hustle and keep raising those babies and teaching them all those languages, that’s amazing!
She can work and raise her children. Kids will go to school learn better they need money for raising them. And the women want to work which is her right. Happy mams makes family happy. My mom had to give up her career to raise us and she got worse and worse mentally. I wish she thought about herself. When you sacrifice all yourself you start depend on them and when kids go you cant find reason to be happy again.
I’m glad on my maternal side, women are encouraged to be financially stable first before getting married. Full of indepent and strong women from that side...something I am able to enjoy now in my 30s☺
And that's why mothers should teach their daughters to be careful picking a husband. There's a longterm effect on the rest of your life if one does choose poorly. Also be careful when moving away from your support people like your family and friends. It's really tough when being completely on your own as a woman, because you're in a really vulnerable position. You really have to watch out.
It's always the husband trying to control his wife. I'm glad my mother stood her grounds because in the end, she's all we got when he cheated and decides to spend on his other family. Don't ever give your financial independence. Have a prenuptial agreement if you want it to be safer. Don't let husbands control you; he's there to protect not control.
Don't marry controlling men. Women control the dating place and look at the men they choose. Your mom destroyed your family with the help of her "husband"
That's why you have that conversation BEFORE the wedding. My husband & I had these talks early in our relationship; I wasn't going to waste my time with someone who didn't share similar views on family, career, etc
Hey guys this is really important I noticed something at 4:38 when the light was directed at the girl's right eye so I really hope if someone tries to reachs out to them to get her eye checked because there is a type of eye cancer (retinoblastoma) that has the same symptoms when light is directed toward the eye. hopefully the girl has nothing but at least get her eye checked out. Please spread this message (from one of the concerned commenters)
Are the children should raised by their mother alone? This husband said, 'as the child grows up, the mother has to be close to their children. Why are you trying to work that doesn't even cost money?' It is ridiculous. The representative Confucianism of Korea is that the wife should raise her children well and take care of her husband at home twenty four hours seven days a week. If a loved one loves her work, isn't it right to encourage her?
One of the reasons why cohabiting couples should allow themselves to be acquainted with each other first before having kids. Be open with your thoughts to each other. If your needs aren't met in that relationship, then it will be less complicated to consider taking a break
It's wonderful that he doesn't want her to work, but she needs to also be independent and he needs to give her more allowance to run a role of a house wife with ease.
Sometimes a parent knows best....her father disapproved the marriage because he knew it wouldnt be the best life for his precious baby girl. So sad he passed away and shes unhappy.
They are only still together, because of the kids. It seems like a lifeless marriage, filled with shattered dreams, and deep regrets. They don’t look like a natural pairing, not even because of racial differences, just something seems off between them. I didn’t feel their love towards each other. These are the impression I got from this video. For the kids sake, I do wish them the best.
I understand her feelings. I'm following my husband as well overseas. It must be hard for her, but she gave a really good example. She is a warrior and a super woman. I hope all the best for her.
Wow, this last part of the video is hard to watch. I cannot blame the wife for this as it was super hard for her to deal with the loss of her dad. I almost lost my dad after he was rushed to the hospital and stayed for almost a month and poor mom was stressed to the max and couldn't take it. Thankfully, I was there to take care of mom and visit dad a lot in the hospital. Thankfully, God saved my dad and he was discharged last week from the hospital and on the road to a full recovery at 89 years old........ultimately amazing!!
![Uzbek mom sends kids to school, works 3 jobs and eats lunch alone at the park [Part 1] | K-DOC](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/UubLgYtU-Kw/mqdefault.jpg)
![Uzbek mom sends kids to school, works 3 jobs and eats lunch alone at the park [Part 1] | K-DOC](/img/tr.png)
![Belly dancing license costs $4,200. Will her husband help her out? [Part 4] | K-DOC](/img/1.gif)
This episode is an eye opener. It is very important for a woman to be financially Independent. It allows you to make important decisions in your life.
if you are financially independent, why even think of marriage? that's stupid. go buy a dog or something...
@@bobbob-vw4cc what point were you even trying to make lmao
@@bobbob-vw4cc what’s wrong with you
@@bobbob-vw4cc men like him: women should just be stay at home moms. Men are the providers. Career women would just die alone with pets.
Also men like him: best I can do is 50 bucks and issues
@@crewmatewillthrowthesehand7600 that's not what he is saying I think .
The fact that he was telling her to spend more time with the children when she was talking about herself and not a single clip shows him being with his kids is just mind-blowing. The mother is not just a mother but also her own person with a life. Now I see this and remember my own parents. This kid will never have a memory with the father and the mother is frustrated.
He could have a gambling problem or has a mistress on the side.
@@MelaniaRose or it could just be the editing, these shows tend to over-exaggerate things (not saying there isn't a possibility he's not around much though)
Both parents should give attention to their kids, but the mother should be giving 80% of effort because that's her duty as a full-time housewife while the husband works his ass off to feed the family. If she chooses to work, who's taking care of the kids?
@@Waterbug1591 I think that's a very old-school stereotype generally. Should be up to the parents to decide how they divide roles and do that BEFORE they even have kids. But I can see how that is still seen as a traditional thing in Korea.
@@Khritter Ya I agree with you completely, I think the husband should swap roles with the wife, she seems to have a brighter career path than him. Men should be allowed to be househusbands cleaning the house, making sandwiches, doing laundry, washing dishes and looking after the kid. It's 2022, not 1960, strong women should financially support weak men, men should be allowed to participate in women's roles and women should pursue a high-paying career to prove that the social construct is a myth.
That was the BEST slap in the FACE ever. "Do you think I am out there PLAYING? Everything I earn is for the kids". Good job Mom!
Hey guys this is really important I noticed something at 4:38 when the light was directed at the girl's right eye so I really hope if someone tries to reachs out to them to get her eye checked because there is a type of eye cancer that has the same symptôme when light is directed toward the eye. hopefully the girl has nothing but at least get her eye checked out . Please sepread this message
@@ayaaissou7671 i hope your comment gets noticed. This is a big concern.
@@ayaaissou7671 it's the reflection of the light maybe
It's crazy how almost everyone here is putting the blame on the husband when he's working his ass off so that the wife doesn't have to. If you don't want to deal with kids, don't even get married and give birth. You don't get to regret later on because I swear if the husband were some sort of millionaire she would be more than happy to be a full-time housewife enjoying a luxurious lifestyle.
@@jaewin4078 not a physical slap they meant like slap with words/reality
Being trapped in this kind of marriage is my worst nightmare. Ugh.
Yes unfortunately the older generation of women chose the wrong men to marry. Now they regret like my neighbors Diane & GRACE! 😅😂😢
@@small_fries7573True men are the worst
Right. Being single is better than this crap.
Agreed....
@@small_fries7573if the most man are bad... who will you want to choose? Be a lesbian 😂
This is why you should talk about your expectations BEFORE marriage! Too many people get married and then are shocked when their partners want something different from what they want talk about what you want before marriage to see if your ideals align don’t wait until you are married with kids to do so!!
Joking right? You can lie or have other expectations once married. Personally, I'd be more controlling if I were married than just being in couple and living together. Bc once married, I'd have other worries.
Facts 💯
It's not like there's a teacher to check if they've passed the expectations or not. She didn't get to study as promised.
Main thing is taking time to know the person you marry.
They did tho, he agreed she'd go to post grad college after they got married and then it didn't happen. People lie, circumstances change, no matter how much you talk things out before marriage, nobody can see the future
Exactly!
5 languages!? Just so impressive... From the looks of both her parents expressions in those pics, neither wanted her to marry & leave.
Yeah her dad was against this relationship even on the day of marriage. Sometimes elders can be right
They didn't want her to leave Kurdistan
Many young people in Uzbekistan know more than 3 or 4 languages
@@mirroruniverse9331 yes,sometimes third people especially parents can see clearer and that doesn't mean they interfere in their children's life..but now she made the decision and have to take responsibility for that!!
I thought it was only 4, but still that's super impressive
It's really sad seeing women who are more competent than their husbands being limited in this way. And you just know that the reason he doesn't want her to go to school is because she would very easily in a very quickly find someone better than him. A lot of men admire women like her and she is just stuck in an unfortunate situation. I hope he at least wakes up and starts being more present for his children.
What you are saying is pretty naive
"very quickly find someone better than him" Yeah no, it would be very hard for a mid 30s(?guess?) woman with 2 children to find a good man.
Ask woman in a similar situation that has tried unsuccesfully (there are unfortunately many)
None of us truly know who's more competent, you can't reach that concusion by watching a 20 minute snippet. People are quick to take sides with the person they relate more with, whether it's race, age, gender, but there's nothing factual about that.
its def not easy being over 30 with kids being able to upgrade or find someone good lol have you seen how many women are struggling with that search community stats and posts it says diffrent to what ur reaching for
Statistics show that single women are the happiest so she would probably have a better life without whether she finds someone or not
@@katelyn9677 that stat referees too single without children or spouse in her case she has kids
Her father understood that she was settling for sooooo much less than she deserved and tried to put a stop to it . He was right .
I thought he had some empathy towards her hard work until he threw in the line "I can't always get my way", and then it just got worse and obviously about his ego, not the family. This man better take it to heart this time and support her even stronger, as a team.
He is unappreciated, unhopeful and ungrateful man. If he knows how to say thank you or appreciated his wife. She will not regret marrying him and will work together for their family.
Unfortunately most men are like that
right my thoughts exactly!!
Right, its for his ego not for the families. If it really for the family and the kids he will grateful and thankful to his wife. She want to help her family that absolutely wanderfull. From what I see, it looks like his wife's job is just a side job that won't take much time and energy. That women really care about their child education, education is expensive the woman is aware of that. Both of them work using their muscles to work, They are not always young and strong to work. So its better to let the woman work and save money for the future
He’s just unsuccessful. Unsuccessful men are like this
Bless the mum. It's written all over her face that she is feeling confined by her husband. She holds up the kids but she looks completely drained. Her dancing seems like moments of release and a chance for her to feel herself. I hope the family finds happiness and comes out of this overwhelming life. No one should be working 3 jobs, looking after two kids and the home.
he saying shell be underpaid
Humans inherited sins. Single or double parents families, guardians, & grandparents don't teach their infants or toddlers to lie, steal food or toys, and to not admit their faults. When u were babies, u inherited sins cuz sin was passed down from our first human father, Adam. As we grow older, we sin more and our magnitude of sins grow more extreme. God doesn't allow sin in heaven.
Therefore if you want to spend eternity on heaven after your life here on earth 🌎, you should believe in your heart ❤️ that Jesus Christ is your Savior. If you don't, you will miss going to heaven and end up in the lake of fire. It is terrible so I beg you to make the only correct decision for God to allow you to go to heaven. Jesus Christ is the only way to eternal life. 🙏 Have a nice day.
@@draco2xxProbably the husband’s fault
Well she wanted to be a mother this life aint for the weak.
I don’t understand why men who can’t provide for the entire family and keeps struggling financially have the nerve to say I don’t want her to work, like what? You are not even rich or financially stable that’s why she has to work as well so she can provide for her kids. Men like that are so selfish
It's a sign of domestic abuse. He wants to isolate her and make her totally dependent on him.
I think most Korean men are generally quite chauvinist in their mindset.
Men like that are not only selfish but also putting a back hold to their own selves from upgrading and growing as a person. Men like that are uncooperative and very rigid, reminds me a lot of my own south Asian dad🙃🙃🙃
If the woman works who is going to look after the kids.
@@theonef570 A nanny in other countries women r very independent work to contribute to the household and taking care of themselves
I got 3 words for this video.
_She deserves better._
Better than raising her own children?
So does he
Average korean jealous men
@@SweetPlain Better life while raising her children; a happy and satisfied woman makes a good mother, not a resentful woman regretting her life, as too much resentment for a long time can put more pressure on her children.
@@SweetPlainsí, dignidad. Ella quiere trabajar para volverse a sentir digna como persona. El trabajo te da el sentido de ser útil, digno y traer el pan de comida a tus hermosos hijos.
Lo sé porque lo viví. Lo que falla acá es la dinámica familiar, su salud mental la está pagando
Cuidar a los niños y al mariño 24/7 es un trabajo más pero ella no tiene descanso ni vacaciones.
Acá solo veo el machismo del esposo y en corea pasa muchísimo esto, si miras solamente las parejas de YT internacionales esto se repite siempre. Y después se divorcian.
Corea recién se está abriendo al mundo y la mentalidad que una mujer puede trabajar y cuidar de sus hijos es algo poco aceptable.
En LATAM también encontras estás situaciones
Brazilian here, a friend of mine moved to Korea during college and she got a boyfriend there. Months after the relationship he commented WHEN (he didn't even say if) when they get married she would have to stop working and studying to stay at home and take care of their children and HIM. She said it felt like she was meeting a man from the 1800's. They broke up a few days later.
Ainda bem que ela se livrou dele
Korea men once get married turned into man-children.
How's your friends spousal visa fantasy going?
@@Sam-hk4qj I don't think she fancies it much lol. Or else she wouldn't have broken up with that guy
That's how South Korea went from a third wolrd country dictatorship to a 1st world country superpower, by having traditional society values. Or korean maybe should become like the shithole where you come from, where cheating is a national sport, where you are destroying the amazon forest everyday, where degeneracy is pretty much your entire culture ? Brazilians and their third worlds counterparts should not give lessons to incredible countries like South Korea, just saying, stay in your lane.
That woman speaks 4 languages and doesn't even work as a translator? That's crazy.. I'm sure she could make a lot of money.
Lol he would feel threatened if she did, coz she would definitely leave his pathetic ass
It's not as simple as speaking a different language = can be a translator. If she doesn't have training, qualifications, work experience, just knowing a language doesn't mean anything to an employer.
In the first video she said she does translating and interpreting for the police. That's her third job.
Working as a translator does not pay. At all!
Knowing languages doesn't make you qualified to be a translator.
She’s a way bigger catch than he deserves. That’s just the truth
than why did she say yes? lol
seems like he's the catch....
@@bobbob-vw4cc Neither one of them spoke about their expectations before marriage. That being said, sh deserves way better. Mans is batting out of his league.
@@bobbob-vw4cc smart ppl are fooled by love all the time. A true measure of a person and their relationship choices is how long it takes to regret the choice you made out of love. It seems she started to regret pretty soon after moving.
Just remember, HE was the one who wanted her to move, HE was the one who made the promises so that she would make that choice to move away from her loved ones into his.
If you are doing all that and have no intention of fulfilling your own part of the deal, then he’s lucky all she has is regrets and hasn’t filled out divorce papers and left.
@@supremacy2040 no, if you are older you have to know better!! Before she knew what she really wanted from her life she decided to get married to another country not knowing the reality and without talking about her expectation!!...don't blame love for their irrisp8nsible attitude!!
Why you gotta be so calculative, why can't marriage be just about love, why you gotta make it a transaction? You have serious issues you need to fix
This episode taught me a lot of things:
1. Being financial independent should be your first priority. Money isnt everything but you need money to survive and it makes life easier.
2. Follow your dreams first. Marriage and kids can come later.
3. Before marriage discuss your roles in the family and financial situation. If your partner disagrees l maybe you shouldn't get married until you both come to an agreement.
4. Get kids when you finally have financial stability and have done what you wanted to do: like studying, dancing. You can do it after kids but still it will be difficult.
5. Life never goes the way you planned.
If he was rich you would be saying something different because he would be her sugar daddy and she would be outside shopping with his hard earned money buying 500 dollar Gucci purses and you would be saying he should let her spend all of his money
@@mrbobbilly2 why would you assume something about some stranger like you know about them your whole life? That's quiet presumptuous. Also if you dont agree with me, just dislike the comment and go instead of being a troll.
@@mrbobbilly2 you sound so ignorant.
@@mrbobbilly2 what an idiotic thing to say.
@@mrbobbilly2 Forcing your opinions on others is one of the most stupid things that people nowadays love to do.
Wow! I really admire the mom. She loves her kids so much that she even opened an account for them. I believe that hard work will pay off eventually. I think the wife and husband have to talk to each other and try to understand what both are going through. Don’t fight in front of kids too because this can affect them mentally when they grow up. I’m rooting for this family! I hope that they can earn lots of money considering the amount of dedication and perseverance they have!! Hwaiting!
Hey guys this is really important I noticed something at 4:38 when the light was directed at the girl's right eye so I really hope if someone tries to reachs out to them to get her eye checked because there is a type of eye cancer that has the same symptôme when light is directed toward the eye. hopefully the girl has nothing but at least get her eye checked out . Please sepread this message
@@ayaaissou7671 I noticed the same thing too. I hope it's not serious though.
@@ayaaissou7671 thank goodness someone else noticed this too. I messaged the channel moderator as soon as I saw it. Hopefully someone takes notice asap!
@@ayaaissou7671 i hope this was filmed recently so that it can be resolved. pls post this as a separate comment instead of a reply so that people can get it to top comment
It's mostly toxic females being the same female privilege and toxic masculinity they accuse other men of being. Literally 99% of comments are toxic to the father. This is depressing literally no woman here is capable of being a good mother or wife.
Giving a man or anyone financial power over you is a big mistake. My mom and dad separated their bank accounts because my dad didn’t like the way my mom handled money and my mom thought my dad was very controlling with money. He was a good dad but very old fashioned and even after everything was said and done he kept trying to tell my mom how to spend her income. Having your own means is always better. People change a lot when it comes money.
Very wise words to be spread.
Even that will be not better for the family. If you're independent in every way and not rely or depend on the relation. I have seen most breakups in marriages are made by the ones who are financially independent. Because in that way you will not depend on your partner and thus it results in breaking of a relationship. I also agreed upon your story as well even that will also lead to the breakup.
I'm so concern about how to depend on your partner in a good way so that you will care about the relation and don't struck the relation for money. It's really hard to figure out a midway
yes..that is true..my friend that is married complained to me that her husband didn't want her to work..but he only give small amount of money for groceries and shopping and that is not enough..my friend barely can buy clothes or anything that she want..
@@Cxs1a3 nice try, she said her friend’s husband didn’t want her to friend to work, he cannot provide but he wont ‘let’ his wife to work too, the fault is completely on him 😁
@@AB-ce3nn Ok it's his fault, you still can't do sh:t about it, except complain, you have to take it whether you like it or not😁
Second income is never hurt.
Maybe just man’s pride that could hurt, but when u have a child to support, u gotta push over that pride and let the income come.
Exactly. What’s more important? Your pride or money to support your children?
He doesn’t even give them proper money for groceries, like he doesn’t want to spend money on his wife and kids and doesn’t want her to work to make money, it’s very upsetting
If a woman makes more money than her husband, she loses respect for her husband and dictates the rules of the family because she's the breadwinner. However, it was stated very clearly that she is expected to fulfil her duty as a wife and mother, nurture your own damn kids instead of dreaming to have a career and sacrificing your time with your kids. Dumb ass modern women choose career over motherhood and become single leftover women, then they cry about it or adopt 5 cats. LOL
This should be a lesson for every women. Never give up your financial independence to be a stay at home wife. What are you going to do if your husband cheat and you can't leave because you don't have money? So many men want to play the role of an "alpha male" or a "father figure" but if an opportunity present it self, they would leave you for someone else and you're left to pick up the pieces of what he left
Так большинство женщин получают образование и строят карьеру. Ничего, все успевают. А к вам едут из нищих стран и бедных решионов,подбирают шваль,на которых хангуеи не посмотрят. Старый, нищий мужик, еще и жадный. На фига он нужен? Какая мать рада таклму зятю? Это позо для корейца. Я-женщина, я могу содержать себя,своего ребенка, родителей, а жтот только детей делает. Это позор для мужика
I 100% agree, do not become a bird trapped in a cage
These statements are based in reality.
A lot of men do work and support their whole families and they don’t cheat or act irresponsibly. This is a problem not so much of gender yet of individuals.
@@jm7578 us ladies already know that it's "not all men", but most women who are watching have had negative experiences with me. For me, I dated a hobosexual for 10 years who never got a job the entire time, my dad would always be controlling of me, my single male friends would always "fall in love with me" and cause drama when I only wanted a platonic relationship, ect.
8:52 - I don't know how this guy did it but I'm a 37 guy and if I was sitting next to that woman as her husband, I would be crying, hugging and begging for her forgiveness. One more thing, if you can't provide enough financially, at least be more compassionate, attentive, loving, etc. Don't act dumb or emotionless.
I don't know it either. But then when you look at life, a lot of people don't get what they deserve, good or bad. It's bizarre to see how undeserving people get better than what you have
Most dudes would apologize and assure them that they made the right decision, but I guess all that's all he could do. I can't imagine being in her situation.
Are you American? Because their culture is WAY different than ours… they handle things way differently than we do
@@soulwinner247 no matter what culture we come from..... if he cannot raise enough money then he should be quiet. And love should always be shown!
It must be hard to be that vulnerable when you have a camera in front of your face. But then again we're so used to seeing that because of "reality" drama filled tv shows.
Consider this as a warning to those girls out there that think married with koreans guys is different from drama and reality
Yep. Gender roles are deep in the korean society. I saw a woman and she broke her arm and her husband still forced her to cook. Sje cried and was struggling
@@CanopusLux Omg! really? She should boil a pot of ramen and pour on his head!
@@CanopusLux Time out, so you think if she was a man, she (now he) would be given time off? It'd be no different if she was a man. So there is no gender roles there, only gender equality, you just contradicted yourself.
@Lamou Lamou if men except women stay at home then he should earn enough money for his family but in this case he dont so that why the wife have to earn money too
@@Cxs1a3 No. no one thinks like that. everyone is sad nowaday. be it housewife or a working women or just any other human.
I see that the mom cares more about the children than the dad. The fact that she thought of their financial future is just so thoughtful and way ahead of her husband.
She chose the husband and the situation that she's in. She was even warned by someone very close to her. If she cared it would be a different outcome
@@alanm6o9 Peterpan syndrome. Some women think they can change the men. Guess what! They never change.
There's a way to not suffer, not be in danger, not be poor, not get hurt, not have to work in vain, not have to feel any kind of negative vibe, & not to be disrespected anymore by anyone.
Imagine you will be invincible, immortal, and holy with a new, upgraded body. Imagine everyone around you will be the same as you without ranking/hierarchy. Isn't that a delightful thought? It's true you or anyone can have eternal life.
All you got to do is to accept Jesus Christ 🙏 as your Savior! Once you do, He will let you into heaven during your day when you finally see Him!
@@alanm6o9like my neighbors Diane & GRACE. They chose horrible husbands! 😅😅
My mom and grandma always told me, be educated, get a job where you can support yourself, date a generous man with a good job and strong work ethic, stay hot and confident, or stay single
Best advice ❤
Here for this! Being a wife slave is my worst fear
I’m left speechless, she may not be completely aware but she is a victim of domestic abuse. Holding her financially hostage, and using his male privilege to manipulate her is so sickening. She was scammed into marrying this man-child. I hope she finds help in Korea for domestic abuse and leaves that abusive man.
That's the comment I was looking for!!! 100%!!!!!!!
Unfortunately this is so common especially in asia that sometimes even the women themselves don't know they're being abused.
THIS
That’s the father of her child. She’s not going to leave. And go where? Her dad died. Think realistically.
It’s not that deep. I think she was young and naive and got wrapped up in him. She let him take over her life. She didn’t put her foot down enough and got caught up in this life. She let life happen to her. She’s not happy with the life she chose but it’s her choice in the end
@@SisterSanMiguel victim blame harder, yikes bro
I don’t blame her. He knew exactly what he was doing. Because she’s a foreigner he thought she’d be easy to tame and control considering she has no money and education.
What kind of husband says to come out of work and focus on kids? It would be one thing if he was rich and could provide for family of 4. He’s in NO position to say that to her. He’s just want her out of work to boost his ego and feel like an “Alpha male”💀🤡
So sad and heartbreaking. She thought about her daughters future way ahead of time which her husband couldn’t do and with husband like that she needs to think way ahead for better future for her kids. I can’t stand this guy. I hope she divorces him for good.
@lunatic “its too long I didn’t read it”🤡Its okey. I really don’t care if you read it or not. People who care will read it.
I think she is better educated than him to be honest. What can he do? Seriously? What did his grand education get him?
@Moon Bae I could’t reply because you deleted your reply but yeah I understand what you’re saying. I do and I agree divorce is not always the solution.But in this situation you can see he thinks she don’t care enough for the kids.
They both work but somehow she needs to look after the kids more..like huh?? He broke the promise as well. Running 4 member household with £50 allowance that he thinks is enough, working to get money, looking after 2 kids and one man child..if she wants to go have a little fun and do job that pays “nothing” to her..god forbid he should let her have it for her own sanity. This poor woman is over working.
@@supremacy2040 THIS. I completely agree. She’s a saint and has better education than him. He’s embarrassing
@Moon Bae where can we see the update?
I’d rather die alone than be in a controlling marriage
She chose to get married. She doesn't have the capacity to think?
@J P feminist ideology. I am a kpop fan 😂 I will go to south Korea 😂 I will get married and I will change another country ideology like in my country 😂if she doesn't like she can divorce and start working hard. Ah But this is Korea when a woman is old, fat and ugly more difficult.
As someone who wants to live alone my whole life, it is always surprising to me than people prefer bad relationship to being alone. I choose living alone over anything else
@@pedrojulio1960 always somehow ends up being the woman’s fault
@@KateeAngel ur biologically incorrect
Omg after watching this couple's videos I can say that I'm grateful for the advices of my parents. "Study, get yourself a job you love and make your own money. Never depend on a partner financially, always have your own bag because you never know". I feel sorry for this lady, this guy is restraining her and she is not even fully aware of it 😢
4:44 Idk if they're reading the comments, but healthy eyes are supposed to flash red, but her's flashes white here. My sister's eye did this in our photos as well and when we had her checked, she ended up having retinoblastoma.
Bumping this for it to get noticed. I spotted this too, my nephew has it. Please help get this pinned!
Oh you are right. Bumping this!
“Promises” we’re NOT broken. It CAN BE DONE. Husband just refuses to let wife go to grad school because he too knows how successful his wife would be. He’s selfish and can’t see past her becoming great. He can step up to be a stay at home father when she goes to school or when she works. IT’S DOABLE. Everything he’s saying are just excuses to prolong her being a SAHM.
@@GandalftheWise i know you got no bitches man
@@GandalftheWise I really hate idiots like you who still think women lifes are just about being a stay mom raising kids and then dying really women can still be successful and be moms too
@@GandalftheWise i didn't know that a woman's only purpose in life is to be a child-bearing machine, thank you kind sir for enlightening me! (/s)
ugh just shut up.
@@tribui3252 when it’s something only a woman can do, it’s expected that it becomes a true purpose. sure you can slave away for a corporation that can easily replace you if that’s what you value over raising a family.
@@GandalftheWise 🙄
This is one of the reasons why I refuse to give up working unless I marry very well off and receive investments, property in my name. The sadness in her eyes says everything. I refuse to struggle like this
well... good luck to you
🤣🤣🤣, dfkm. 💀
@@DenisFrance88 Thank you!
@@j.rjunior5584 I won't 😊
@@raquelmacdonald8572 noo one is gonna give you investments, nor property.
You're supposed too create that yourself. LoL
Finally seeing the true nature of cultural issue of korean mens. Im reading alot of shared experience dating or marrying korean mens and most of the things they shared is especially if your marrying them is that you have to set things straight from the start to them. Meaning better tell them your plans for work or your career wise and tackle the money issue. At least from the start if they disagree you already have an idea what kind of guy your dealing with.
Hey guys this is really important I noticed something at 4:38 when the light was directed at the girl's right eye so I really hope if someone tries to reachs out to them to get her eye checked because there is a type of eye cancer that has the same symptôme when light is directed toward the eye. hopefully the girl has nothing but at least get her eye checked out . Please sepread this message
@@ayaaissou7671 i think thats red reflex but it doesnt hurt to go for a check up. U mean retinoblastoma, right
Korean and south asian men seems same...wife is for looking house and kids...oh yeah by the way both men dont cook...cooking is considered insult
@@liquidswordfish nah , i have to correct you with all due respect . No , not all asian men thinks this way . With the new and upcoming generation we dont all think like that . Me and my male friends love cooking , this is what i would see as a stereotype in what foreigners thinks about us . I would LOVE my lady being successful in what she really does . What my male friends would like was the same as me. Maybe i grew up in Singapore so we do share quite a realistic approach or having the non traditional asian “ culture” because simply Singapore’s standards of living is too high for one men to tank the whole family 😅😂 But , with my experience for all to read , Asian men are not all like these XD it also depends on where they come from and how their family inculcate their culture on them, especially from young. For me and my friends , we are born in 2000 so … we just think that these sterotypes that men should only work or even cooking is an insult are literally bullshit 😂
@@joejackson6227 hello sir i am talking about south asian...which means india,pakistan and begladesi ...not whole asia ..i know them how they are ..its in culture and 99 percent are like that anyways you from singapore well i saw while in singapore how 99 percent of men carry their wives bags i assume how you guys are, its not bad but in singapore case i felt it is more female dominated unlike malaysia...and by the way i have never seen so much money hungry singaporean girl beside korean, i felt sorry for singaporean guys whose girl or wife treat them like shit just because they lack money...so i guess its time to man up huh..can or no ...can can 😂😂
Honestly this marriage reminds me of my parents' abusive marriage. My mom's parents also disapproved of her marrying my dad. My mom was the main breadwinner but also the one taking care of me and my siblings. When she found my dad had a mistress at his work, she quit her job out of anger- BIG mistake on her part. My dad became the breadwinner while my mom was reduced to just a housewife. When she tried to go back to work, he would belittle, gaslight, and manipulate her to discourage her from working even though we desperately needed the money since his money was not enough to sustain us. Many abusers are narcissists and my dad is one; he wanted to be the hero of the family. The one who gets to say "look at me, I'm working so hard to feed to you while you're just having fun at home with the kids". And the sad thing is everyone outside the family believes him. Luckily my mom is a strong woman and she's working hard for her Masters so she can return to work and divorce my dad.
Ladies, it is important that you be financially independent! Or else there may come a day when you're treated like a housewife or- in the case for abusive marriages - a house servant.
Edit: Since a few of you have been taking my words about being a housewife out of context, I want to clarify I am not belittling that role. But imagine that you are a woman with a successful job. You're able to buy whatever you want without anyone's permission or having to beg to borrow money. You are also a wonderful mother. You work 12 hours every day while your husband watches TV all day. Every night, you come home to do your household duties including cook dinner, help kids with homework, serve your husband, bathe the kids, etc. Next day - repeat it all. One day, you quit your job because you find out your husband has been spending your hard-earned money on his mistress. Now your husband is the breadwinner which leaves him in control of all finances. Since you have no job anymore, you're only a "housewife". Why the quotation marks? Because in the context of the situation, your husband treats you more like a house servant even though your role is called "house wife". Remember you are an immigrant without a job. You have no friends or family to help you out- only your physically and mentally abusive husband who controls all finances. "Go wash the dishes" , "cook me dinner right now", "wash my laundry", etcetc - you have to obey every command OR ELSE. You think Cinderella had it tough? My mom had it worse. She loved her job and I can see in the comments below that many of you guys can relate to wanting to be more than a housewife. For many women like my mom, their JOB is their pride. It's fine to be a housewife but you need to understand not every woman wants that role. As I explained below, nobody likes to be demoted to a job they never intended to be stuck with. But just because you don't want the job that doesn't mean you're belittling it or those who have it. It's simply a job you don't want, and for my mom who once made a LOT of money in her career, being a house servant with the label of "housewife" is a huge step down for her. Now she has to beg my dad for money to buy necessities like groceries. Please read my words in the context of the situation I have provided you.
Now tell me, in her ABUSIVE situation, do you think it's okay for her to be "just a housewife"? It is incredibly hard for a woman to be "just a housewife" when she is in an abusive relationship with a man who holds her life (and her children's) in the palm of his hand. So please do not put words in my mouth and say I'm belittling housewives when I have only the highest respect for women like my mom who have to slave away in the house.
Edit 2: For EXTRA clarification since some people are still misconstruing my words - It is NOT fine to be just a "housewife" for an abusive husband. It is NOT fine to have to beg for money to feed your children. It is NOT fine to be treated like a slave instead of an equal. Abused women CANNOT afford to be only a "housewife" because that leaves them at their abuser's mercy. They need financial independence aka a job in order to have the means to escape the abuse. However! If you are NOT in an abusive marriage then it IS perfectly fine to be a housewife if that's what a woman wants. Whatever role makes you happy then go for it. But obviously a "housewife" with an abusive husband would NOT have that opportunity and I already explained why. Honestly, the fact some people here think I'm talking about regular housewives when my whole context specifically revolves around ABUSED housewives really speaks volumes of your privilege and I am appalled. I hope you will never know what it's like to be a "housewife" for an abusive husband. For those of you below who have commented your experience and how you relate a lot to my comment as an abused housewife yourself, I'm so sorry you've had to suffer like that. I hope one day you find the means to escape your situation and improve your life.
The problem here is not that she was the breadwinner because sometimes women get better jobs than men. The problem is that she stayed after finding out he cheated on her. That must psychologically affect her. Money is not going to fix a toxic marriage. She should have left him the minute she found out. Its sad how we as women make excuses for men inorder to protect the family.
@@Katarina23 Yes, I asked my mom why quit your job and stay with a cheater? My mom said she did not want dad to be happy with his mistress. It angered me because my siblings and I had to endure years of physical and mental abuse because, by quitting her job, my mom left us completely at his mercy. Though I know she regrets it because she too had to suffer with us. She also said she didnt divorce him also because as an immigrant she had nobody else and was scared to raise 3 kids all by herself. It's hard to escape a bad marriage when you have kids and are a foreigner.
I hope she understands that once she gets her masters and a high paying job and *then* tries to get a divorce, she might end up being the one paying him alimony and child support if the kids are young. She needs to divorce first and get everything settled.
@@XactlyCeSe1 Thankfully my siblings and I are adults now although none of us have a stable or high paying job. We carry a lot of trauma and went through a lot of struggle because of decades of abuse that we're still finishing our degrees. Recently my older siblings were diagnosed with schizophrenia, so my mom is now relying on me to get a high paying but stable job so that we can leave dad and I'll take over as the main breadwinner. My mom is old now so, even with a degree, she likely won't be able to work for many more years. Sad to say she wasted her prime years acting as her husband's house servant.
So please, any lady reading this - have some self respect and be as financially independent as possible! Even if your relationship seems perfect right now, you never know how circumstances might change. My dad was kind to my mom for the first few years, but that's how they lure you in. Once children come into the picture, your marriage will either change for the better... or worse.
Quite similar to me
I would recommend the book “Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982” for those of you that enraged by this video. It is very eye opening, and it is written following a woman’s life from her birth until she becomes a housewife. Reminds me a bit of this situation.
Thanks
I read it, it was really good. Definitely similar to this situation.
Yes the book was a difficult pill to swallow for the male Koreans
I support the writer who wrote that book to portray the inequalities of the Korean society
Then I need to read it for sure! I'm buying it right now
@@Squirrel3174 The book is statistically backed and not "feminazi" in any way. Plus, the author is not even a "feminazi," and people should stop creating words with "Nazi." It completely downplays the horrors of World War 2. What the Nazis did is incomparable to the so-called "feminazi" movement.
The movement we should be discussing is the strong anti-feminist movement amongst milennial Korean men. When Irene from Red Velvet recommended "Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982," her so-called male fans posted videos of them tearing and burning up her pictures while cursing her.
This book is important, because it portrays discrimination and hardships that many Korean women went through. It tells the harsh truth about being a woman in South Korea.
Why is the author being villainised when she is simply against gender inequality? Gender discrimination and s*xual harassment is a MASSIVE issue in South Korea. Why don't you focus your energy on bringing attention to that?
If there’s one thing to learn from this show, it’s that many Korean men treat their Korean wives poorly, and treat their foreign wives even worse.
Right but delusional foreigners believe they will marry a K-Drama oppa😂
Its not a Korean thing. Its a MALE thing
@@EughhBrothereughh But in korea it's like a culture thing, no wonder the birth rate went down
@@EughhBrothereughhyeah sure
um, no , it just shows the expectations for husbands are way higher than as a wife.
sigh... this is just sad bc she deserves much better ! she's quite talented and intelligent, I hope that she can get a job in a field she enjoys + pays well bc her I know for sure she should not be taking her loser husband's advice. I understand they're both stressed but he should be encouraging her to help instead of forcing her into a purely housewife role when they barely can support themselves on one income. Like I said on the last video, her late father was probably right to have disapproved of her moving away and marrying this man and I'm sure she knows that better than anyone.
They can work together and help together for household expenses, childrens and health check up/hospitalization just in case of medical emergencies, and the husband, he should be thankful for his wife and much appreciated for her genuine love for them. But he seems ungrateful and unhopeful man.
Why is he a loser? He had a good job and he lost it and they wont hire him due to his age. Is your job guaranteed or do you think every country provides a 401k?
Loser was a bit much people have different outlooks in life. You're right about them talking about instead of clashing like this. Don't have to call her husband a loser when he clearly still loves her.
@@Katarina23 I'm not saying he's a loser because he was made redundant from his job or really anything about his job security. It's about his attitude, he leaves essentially all of the child-rearing responsibilities to her and on top of that is reluctant to give her an allowance so she can buy things for the kids (not even for herself). If money is such an issue he needs to put patriarchal values aside and encourage her to find a better paying job so she can help out financially instead of having the burden of a single income household. Not to mention he questioned her abilities to take care of the children and asked her to 'focus more on them', as if she isn't the only one who actually ensures they are well fed, clothed and in school on time etc. That's loser behavior to me so I said what I said!
@@misslday9848 his a loser
Women get your degrees!!! I remember since I could speak my mom hammered that into my brain day in and day out. She's obviously such a talented woman and I believe she could honestly excell if she went back to school. But now she has to think of the kids and how they're going to raise them so its hard. Children can be a blessing but they can also bring about feelings of regret and bitterness. Sometimes parents know best...its not that they don't want to see us happy but often times they've gone through things that they don't want us to go through.
woman in Africa, specifically my country, the woman here are studying with bursaries, and they are married with 3 or 4 kids. She will be better of studying, getting her degree and getting the hell out of that deadbeat marriage. She will be so much better off earning her own living, plus she wi be a good example for her daughters.
Yes & also keep working with the degree you earn!! My mom got her degree but then she stopped working for a while when we moved to the US. When she fought with my dad she felt trapped bc it was harder to leave with no income lined up :( Thankfully she has found a job now & their relationship is much better from it tbh
She has a degree and said in another video that she could do other work, but once children came into the picture she needed a flexible schedule so she had to take odd jobs and small part time work.
It's not about getting degrees it's about getting a husband that supports the wife and doesn't put all the responsibility of caring for the children on the wife. Mothers almost always give up their careers because their husbands think caring for the children is a mom's job when it should be both.
@@beany1944 Yeah, African culture is much better for women, she should of Married an African man who are richer and treat women better than Korea
Now that I’m older I understand how important it is to be financially independent. Always keep that in my the next time you think of giving up your studies/job/career/good opportunities … for the sake of someone else.
I'm from Philippines, not a rich country, but I'm educated here, working and somehow living a good, middle class life. Once there was a Chinese man in Australia, wanted me to live with him there and have a family. I didn't accept because I have more dreams like this girl. But I didn't get manipulated because I didn't believe that the man would send me to graduate school. I don't want to have children yet. I believe once I got pregnant, like this man, all of those false promises will never happen. I trusted my guts and I'm firm to my principle that a woman should be financially independent and must not depend on someone, especially a man, to get her out of her bad life situation like poverty etc. I must do it myself so I don't owe anyone
If I was her I would get a job no matter what he says. She needs to be financially independent. Every woman should. Not only that but what if he loses his job, they would have no income then.
@@Waterbug1591 he can stay at home while she works 🤷🏻♀️ and she probably will make more money than him
@@lester2162 Ya I agree with you completely, I think the husband should swap roles with the wife, she seems to have a brighter career path than him. Men should be allowed to be househusbands cleaning the house, making sandwiches, doing laundry, washing dishes and looking after the kid. It's 2022, not 1960, strong women should financially support weak men, men should be allowed to participate in women's roles and women should pursue a high-paying career to prove that the social construct is a myth.
@@Waterbug1591 I never said she should get a full time job, part time job is also okay.
@You need a medic YOU SPOT ON BRO, I yearn for the day when women will fully accept a stay-at-home man to prove that the equality they've been fighting for is feasible.
The reality is however, when a woman makes more money she WOULD NOT respect her man the same way she would respect him if he earned MORE than her. It's crazy.
Very true
My dad did this to my mom and then they had divorce. My mom struggled bad to raise me up now I am working and things are bit calm ..few days back she told me never drop your financial independence no matter how secure or trustworthy guy you get ..financial independence is your wing ❤
Thanks for sharing 👍. I hope your mom find happiness 😊.
God will bless you and her 🙏. Keep it up ❤
Life is unpredictable and fragile...it's ok to worry cuz as humans we don't live in a perfect, secured society.
Have u thought about whether u go 2 heaven or hell after this life? Cuz life is short & fragile. Look at how many peeps die each day...but there's hope...
Fortunately there's a way to not suffer, not be in danger, not be poor, not get hurt, not have to work in vain, not have to feel any kind of negative vibe, and not to get tired anymore.
Imagine you will be invincible, immortal, and holy with a new, upgraded body. Imagine everyone around you will be the same as you. Imagine everyone will respect each other. Isn't that a delightful thought? It's true you or anyone can have such a perfect, eternal life.
All you got to do is to accept Jesus Christ 🙏 as your Savior! Once you do, He will let you into heaven during your day when you finally see Him!
My mother can sadly not leave him, she can‘t find a job anymore at her age and she suffers badly. Our entire family suffers under our narc father who made her stop working nearly 30 years ago. I hope we can be free some day
I really advise all women to be financially independent. No one would want to manipulate and abuse you even further cuz you're capable of standing up for yourself. Narcissists don't like that.
yup..but right now I just being fired from my job after over two years working there..I cry so hard..I do want to get married and have kids..but suddenly I lost my job..I am women..no men want women that don't work..
@@bella8145-d9z Hey, how are you now? Do you have any backup plan in mind? If not, you can start reevaluating your goals. You don't have to succumb to pressure in getting married and having kids. Do your own pace :) It is okay to start over. I'm hoping all the best for you.
@@btsmochimi7924 thankfully I have save a lot during my time working there..but need to find other job fast..but my company and my boss is also toxic..sometimes I feel glad that I am not working there anymore but it is hard to get a job nowadays
@@bella8145-d9z This is true but the thing is men want women who work at the time of meeting them and then expect them to quit for them in the future after marriage, while dating of course you need your own job. I think this is the issue with this type of relationship, the fact that you will quit when they ask you is an ego boost.
@@jasminejo1846 yup..men are ego..they want to be a breadwinner even they can't afford it..and I just find a new job with higher salary..so it is ok
This is why if you love K-pop keep your fantasy within kpop. Real people lives in reality
It warmed my heart to see her saving money for her daughters! Like what is it that women can't do?? She gave birth to them + loves them + takes care of them + performs and saves money for them! She's such a good person!!
But one income is not something you should depend on. She should try teaching those multiple languages in an institute! I was raised by a working mother, I turned out fine. She's a great mom, her kids will turn out fine too! Go and get a full time job! 💜💜 You're doing great! Don't depend on your husband and his limiting beliefs.
Much respect to women in general ❤. As a man, I have respect and sympathy 👏 for them. God bless them and not those kind of bad men 😊
Sheesh he never shows any emotions at all and looks so repressed, like he’s hiding something. For all the girls who think they should go to Korea and find a husband because they think Korean men are perfect, let this be a WARNING.
Ok next ATM machine
Same worldwide 🌐. 😅
Men are men especially the older generation born in da 50s, 60s, and 70s. Traditional narrow minded men from that boomer gen are ummm #sussy #mentallyill
@@Squirrel3174atm machine? Hahahah he's fucking poor. I bet if the woman was the one working she would be the atm haha
@@Squirrel3174he’s controlling you nut
This woman is the whole package. She deserves BETTER!!!
it's supply and demand, not about deserve
4B movement all the way! I’m rooting for these women who have to deal with Korean men. As the women deserve so much in life!
That’s why watching 90 Day Fiancé series is an eye opener. You have to ask serious questions for a marriage to work.
Has to be hard being along in a foreign country, and raising two kids? Wow… moms are amazing..
Hey guys this is really important I noticed something at 4:38 when the light was directed at the girl's right eye so I really hope if someone tries to reachs out to them to get her eye checked because there is a type of eye cancer that has the same symptôme when light is directed toward the eye. hopefully the girl has nothing but at least get her eye checked out . Please sepread this message
Yes moms are amazing. Nowadays younger dads are becoming increasingly amazing too! It's just the older, more narrow-minded, more selfish men who are the problematic parasites in the marriages 😅
I have watched all three clips. It reminds me that no matter how romantic and wonderful a relationship looks like in K dramas or any dramas,it actually just a trick or a propaganda to encourage marriages and improve birth rates for countries’ future labour.And young women like us are vulnerable to these “sugar coated bombs”.Like all the fairytales end up with “they live happily ever after”,it never shows the hard part of maintaining marriage,supporting family and much less the pain of labor. Let’s be realistic and independent.People and life are more complicated than they looks like in a drama or a movie. Do not let the “love scenes”blind your eyes and make decisions depending on emotions. Do not rush into committing a relationship and a marriage when you or your partner are not ready.
God is love ❤. He will offer eternal life after this life.
There's a way to not suffer, not be in danger, not be poor, not get hurt, not have to work in vain, not have to feel any kind of negative vibe, & not to be disrespected anymore by anyone.
Imagine you will be invincible, immortal, and holy with a new, upgraded body. Imagine everyone around you will be the same as you without ranking/hierarchy. Isn't that a delightful thought? It's true you or anyone can have eternal life.
All you got to do is to accept Jesus Christ 🙏 as your Savior! Once you do, He will let you into heaven during your day when you finally see Him!
She can speak 5 languages. Let her get a job where she can work from home. Be a translator, or a tour guide. She's super talented. Don't waster your life away waiting for something to happen. Be happy please. You both are truly blessed with true love (that's why you both got married in the first place) and 2 beautiful, healthy daughters. Make happiness happen. Wishing you both the best!
The valuable lesson that my mom taught me is to never quit my job. I did not listen and i quit my job so i can join my partner overseas. he then became ill and had to quit. Thank goodness i was able to get a job again after being unemployed for a couple of years. I was incredibly lucky to get back to my career when a lot of people didnt have the chance. That's why ladies, dont rely on a man's promise that he'll take care of you.. some unexpected things might happen.
When I first laid my eyes on the title, I automatically knew the marriage was a big hot red flag. The husband deprived the wife of her financial abilities just so he could show his pride and have his masculine ego. Its so obvious that the wife looks depressed and drained. He is abusive and wicked. Plus, the wife could probably earn more money if she worked. This is just outrageous and I feel so uncomfortable knowing that she just scammed herself into such a toxic environment. Worse part is, since she has kids now, its going to be way more difficult to leave him. I really pray she gets out of this marriage and live happier.
All korean men have a mind 1800
Because their parents think that way
They follow in their parents' footsteps
Their parents, who follow the thinking of 1800, are the ones who force their children to blindly obey, so you find a young man in his twenties or thirties saying that the woman is in the home, obeying her husband, pregnancy and childbirth, and the most important thing is to serve my parents.
Rather, the words of his parents, because from his childhood he was raised by his parents, the old generation that follows retrograde customs and traditions from the 1800s. The child’s brain is washed from his childhood with these ideas, and he applies them to his future wife
This is not the incitement of his parents against him and their incitement against him in any decision he takes
The mother reminds me of mine..she sacrificed so much for love, her husband and their children. Just like the lady here, my mom also saved every little extra she had in a dedicated savings account. I have not touched a cent of the amount in there. I will pay it forward to my own children one day. And I will cherish and honor my mom more, while she’s still around.
This reminds me of my mother also. But everything my mom saved was stolen by my father. After 17 years of marrige, she divorced my father.
She’s way out of his league. She’s an attractive intelligent talented woman and a great mother. Like bro you couldn’t have asked for a better wife appreciate her instead of criticizing her when you’re doing the bare minimum. She deserves better
This is why I refuse to stop working. Had that happen to me for less than 6 months and I can't even buy myself soda or chips. It's exhausting to work full time and be a full time parent but it's more exhausting to feel helpless stuck at home.
Cannot you find something to work from home? Lmao You can earn a good wage on your own, a lot of mothers with small kids do it in my town.
Share custody or give the father primary custody then you get to be the "cool parent". The problem with women is that they forget that children have a FATHER and a mother, give him the kids and make HIM take care of them fulltime. We're not Virgin Mary, that child has a human father lol.
Such a good mother, saving for her kids future 😢
She looked so tired and lifeless at the table and in the filming. i hope things are better. I hate when ppl get married men expect the wife give up 100% of themself, while men give up nothing or just a little bit. You never want to be the reason your partner is stagnant. You’re suppose to help each other grow to be the best person/parent you guys can be together🥲
The husband is giving up nothing? Dude works so hard everyday and barely gets time to relax . You make it sound like he's out there drinking and partying while his wife is providing enough for a family of four. He could 100 percent do better but it's unfair to say that he's given up nothing and she's the only one trying her best.
But he’s unhappy too?? All he does is work, work, work… he wishes he could be at home with his wife and daughters and he can’t because he has to provide for them
The man give nothing??? What are you an idiot??? He's working his ass off all day long to provide for his family, he even got badly injured while doing his job... you bunch of retard biased feminists know nothing about real life .
@@schwabschwab1842 Agree, initially I thought he didn't try hard at work but it seems he's doing the best he can delivering ice cream n at least that is commendable. Not everyone can be a high flyer n earn big bucks, what matters is giving his best n hopefully in time finds a better paying job. As long he's not spending it on smoking, gambling, womanizing n alcohol like some men do..
@@soulwinner247 He's literally controlling her finances. He won't let her have access to her own money and only gives her an incredibly small allowance that can barely cover the grocery bill and clothing for her children. That is literally financial abuse. Also he isn't contributing anything. He barely takes care of the children too (in the first part he gave his child food that could have landed her in the hospital because she has a some sort of food disease). So not only is she working multiple jobs, she is being financially abused by her husband, and she is the one doing most of the work taking care of their children.
She can make good money being a translator. She's smart. I hope she does what will make her happy.
I've had some guys tell me that "oh your just mad because your alone and that you think making a world a better place and being in a relationship is a waste of time".
Honestly I enjoy my peace and tranquility.
😂 see you on tik tok in a year complaining
Ur just mad coz ur alone.
@@d1user you're just proving their point
@@takumint8172 I take it ur alone aswell.
It's scientifically documented that single women who never got married and don't have kids are the healthiest and happiest in the population. Married women live shorter lives than unmarried women. For men, it's the opposite, unmarried men live shorter lives, are more depressed, less happy than married men.
Men want women to want to marry and have kids. They shame those who don't want to because it serves their best interest when more women want kids and marriage. Men treat women like objects that can serve them in some way. So many men never stop seeking greener pasture even after marriage. They just know they want kids and they know most women will never abandon their kids so they get her pregnant, exhaust her youth and beauty before leaving her for someone who hasn't bear the burden of having and caring for his kids.
It's not worth it to get married and have kids for 50% divorce rate and 8 years average marriage length. Make your own money, get rich, stay single, stay unburdened, untraumatized, and unaffected by this patriarchal society.
My wish for her n all like her is that the country of Korea would STOP being so prejudice against outsiders or those of a different race
Some races are incompatible with east asians. Only europeans can fit into east asian culture. N vice versa. Coz both races have high iq. Rest of the races could be very harmful. South asians,south east asians,africans. It has been in germany. Lots of bad stuff. I dont wanna go deep in that.
It happens to every homogeneous country sadly 🤷♀️
@@tmtmtm520 Actually it happens in countries with a history of different groups of people too. Well more particularly, the countries built as European colonies taking over land that belonged to the people who live there before, the natives.
Look at the history of the U.S.A. - the colonists sailed over from England and set up a colony, they eventually grew in number and decided to get rid of British rule and established a free nation, then they fought wars with the native Americans and wiped out many and forced them to live in certain areas, they brought over slaves from Africa and got rich from cotton and tobacco etc. using the unpaid labor of slaves. And then they kept black people in check with laws after slavery was abolished. When waves of immigrants came into the U.S. they also faced discrimination and sometimes violence - for example the Chinese laborers, then the Japanese agricultural workers (sugarcane cutting is why Hawaii has so many Japanese descendents). Eastern European and Southern European (e.g. Italians) immigrants faced a lot of discrimination as well. Then Mexican immigrants and workers in southwestern U.S.A., then Vietnamese and Koreans aftee the Vietnam War and Korean War brought refugees, war brides and economic migrants. Then immigrants with more education from India and South Asia who took IT jobs. The U.S. has a very long history of immigrants from all parts of the world, and yet issues of discrimination have not gone away - yes, they're much better than in the past, but racial politics is still a very sore spot there.
Meanwhile South Korea used to a country where people left as migrants to go to other countries. And it's only recently become a "wealthy" developed country where people from poorer countries want to move to, to work and to live. So the history of Korean contact with foreigners in Korea is very short. Would this woman have gone to live in Korea during the 80s? When people were forced to keep quiet and avoid criticizing the government, when wealthy factory owners would ignore safety rules and force bad conditions upon workers, when the military would crack down on civil protests or demonstration by shooting them, when police would beat up ordinary people if they even suspected them of anything, when there were night curfews and military controlled everything?
Yes, Korea is a very homogeneous country. And that's a factor in their difficulty accepting different people. But we also need to look at their history and lack of contact until quite recently.
Frankly it's not as bad as people make out when you consider that nobody was going to South Korea just 40 years ago. Look up some videos about 1980s Korea. The people were still mostly poor, and a brutal military dictatorship was in control of the country. Don't forget that the country was rebuilding from the extreme poverty and devastating effects of the war with the Communist North (the Korean War).
By the 90s standards of living had improved but you could still see a lot of poverty in the nation. Then they suffered the IMF crisis and gradually rebounded from that. So the building up of living standards and wealth to what you see now, is fairly recent if you think about it. Koreans in their 50s and 60s would still remember how things were in the 80s when they were kids.
Anyway it's only recently that Korea has had the money that would attract people from poorer countries. Before that, Korea WAS one of those poorer countries - in fact, a very poor one.
So foreigners coming in and living there (as opposed to staying there for a few years like the many Americans and other English speakers who teach there, or work for companies, or the U.S. Department of Defence employees) is really really new. As new as Korea's new wealth and modernity. It's a very short time for people who had previously lived in a sealed-off all-Korean world for most of their history.
Korea is very rich now and popular. They think they are the new Americans.
This is what exactly also happens to Korean married couples when especially wives don't have their own jobs. I personally want to say it’s trace of patriarchalism that still heavily lingers on Korean society, and it can even link to domestic violence, given my personal experience.
Oh I'm sorry for you.
@@lua-user you should be happy Korean society survives in progressive societies no one has kids and those societies slowly disappear because of selfish women who want career
@@tanura5830 smh go back to war and serve the country
@@h0zumi I will serve my country if needed
Thanks for sharing your experiences and opinions 🎉. Men in usa, China, and Japan are similar particularly the older generation from ages 50 to 80!
Id be so proud to have a mother like her. So selfless and hardworking. I salute and bow to you Maam.
That's not good though. She shouldn't have to be selfless. This is soul breaking. And that rubs off on the kids.
@@chaosswa-ee-ty5911 exactly. So frustrating to see
She is truly amazing! She deserves the world. Her husband is underappreciating her :(
I don't know why she married him...he don't have good looks nor have money and more important he don't even have good heart who support her wife and family😒..she deserves better than this
Cos love is blind 🤗
That's why people should learn to love themselves every day than to set for so low. She knows 5 languages, has many interests and had plans to get a college graduation but instead she's with that guy, she'd go far without him
she’s not much of a score in the beauty department, either and it looks like she was depending on him towards her success so she married him.
The one area where he obviously fell short was in supporting her when she wanted to work...but he is likely also thinking of the children's welfare & the importance of having 1 parent around. Looks are a really superficial way of determining if someone is a suitable partner, and as much as one person might value it there's no reason why that should be the 'standard' that every person seeking a spouse should bow to. He clearly had a fairly well-paying job when they got married, given that he worked in a semiconductor company until not long ago when retrenchment came his way, and he isn't bumming around but working to financially support his family, so I don't understand the logic of most of this comment.
Did you even watch the video? He had a good job in semiconductors, that's computers. It's not ok to body shame women, but somehow it's ok to body shame men, that's why there will never be "gender equality".
I want to give her my warmest hug. She is the definition of supermom. I can’t even imagine doing what she’s doing, that’s a lot to juggle. 아이고 이거 눈물난다 ㅠㅠ
The look on her mum's face in the wedding photos says it all!
Hi, I’m a Neurology resident from Germany, and I think the older daughter might possibly have Retinoblastoma. At 4:44, there’s a typical sign where the pupils appear white when exposed to light. I would recommend having her eyes checked by an ophthalmologist if it hasn’t already been done. I hope I’m wrong, and that she and her family are healthy. Please make the family know, @K-DOC. Thanks.
Yes!!! I do agree!
And people tell me I'll change my mind about getting married when it's "too late." I've known since I was 14 that I do NOT want to be a wife.
Period
Same
And they always blackmail women with "too late". There's no too late. They just want you to rush in and make the same mistakes they made because they don't want to be the only ones suffering while you're unburdened because you don't have a husband and kids.
Same, that shit is not made for me at all 💀
@Riya exactly. Who is he to "allow" his wife to make choices. If she needs permission from her husband to do the same things she could freely do before marriage, then 100 times better being single
I felt her.. she knows now and she is doing her best to give something to her kids, she is amazing for sure, I admire her and I would like to know how is she doing, we have little yet I would love to send something to their kids, just to share our little too, there was a time when we had a hard period an a random mom send me a small package with cute stuff for kids, she said "we have little, we can share very little but I hope you feel this beautiful warm feeling", I felt it and when we were doing better I send her a small package too with a "thankyou".
Ohh wow!!!!! Damn how on earth this woman have soooo much talent like that!!! wowwww i love and adore her sooo much..
It’s because of reasons like this that I have extreme doubts about getting married
I feel so sad for her. I hope she got a chance to visit her parents before her dad died. Life has a way of turning things upside down
That was so rude of him to insinuate that she doesn't care about her kids wtf what kind of husband says "you need to start paying attention to the kids" while she literally works three jobs so the kids can go to college , cooks, cleans and teaches them.
They both are are really hardworking parents and she’s such a great mom, I hope she gets to do what she loves
Humans inherited sins. Single or double parents families, guardians, & grandparents don't teach their infants or toddlers to lie, steal food or toys, and to not admit their faults. When u were babies, u inherited sins cuz sin was passed down from our first human father, Adam. As we grow older, we sin more and our magnitude of sins grow more extreme. God doesn't allow sin in heaven.
Therefore if you want to spend eternity on heaven after your life here on earth 🌎, you should believe in your heart ❤️ that Jesus Christ is your Savior. If you don't, you will miss going to heaven and end up in the lake of fire. It is terrible so I beg you to make the only correct decision for God to allow you to go to heaven. Jesus Christ is the only way to eternal life. 🙏 Have a nice day.
She a wonderful lady, beautiful, wife and an amazing mother. ❤
And that, my dear sisters, is the lesson to be learned here! Be productive and independent, cultivate hobbies and social life outside of your husband and children.
As the other half of a transnational marriage, I could not understand how two people form a union without discussing important topics like career, children, integration/assimilation, etc. I knew that language proficiency, education and work come first before children. The longer you stay in your partner's country, the higher the expectation of your language proficiency. But, this is just me...
I walking outside when suddenly a pregnant woman approached me and said "do you study? Do you work?" I told her yeah i study in college then she said "whatever you do work and earn money don't depend on a man because he won't provide the things you want" then proceeded and said "you see I'm pregnant and my husband doesn't give me enough money to take care of myself"
He promised her, and he broke it. It sounded like they did have that prep talk before marriage. But why is he sending her off to grad school? Shouldn’t she go herself? Unless she meant he is either paying or will help pay for it.
My dad does this to my mom so I hate things like this. If you make an agreement prior to marriage, keep it. What does she even see in this guy?
With her ability, wouldn’t she bring in more $$?? Who knows. I wish better for her.
Actually, no, without him she'd still be in Uzbekistan, so she would be making less than even a poor Korean, even is she made above average salary.
Westerners find this difficult to understand, cuz they live in a priviliged environment where different races get paid somewhat equally, that's not the case in the rest of the world. Koreans get paid literally like 10x what Central Asians get paid for the same job.
Who's gonna take care of the kids if she goes to grad school and spend 90% of her time there?
@@Waterbug1591 I'm pretty sure there are daycares in South Korea. And maybe the father's side of the family can also help take care of their girls.
@@janibit Yeah, do 50 50 and split the nanny bills i think that works!
@@Waterbug1591 why are kids always a woman responsibility? They husband can also raise his kids.
Look at how amazing she is doing with those girls. Why in the world would she want to leave them? Just get a side hustle and keep raising those babies and teaching them all those languages, that’s amazing!
@Lu Zu work from home
She can work and raise her children. Kids will go to school learn better they need money for raising them. And the women want to work which is her right. Happy mams makes family happy.
My mom had to give up her career to raise us and she got worse and worse mentally. I wish she thought about herself. When you sacrifice all yourself you start depend on them and when kids go you cant find reason to be happy again.
I’m glad on my maternal side, women are encouraged to be financially stable first before getting married. Full of indepent and strong women from that side...something I am able to enjoy now in my 30s☺
And that's why mothers should teach their daughters to be careful picking a husband. There's a longterm effect on the rest of your life if one does choose poorly. Also be careful when moving away from your support people like your family and friends. It's really tough when being completely on your own as a woman, because you're in a really vulnerable position. You really have to watch out.
It's always the husband trying to control his wife. I'm glad my mother stood her grounds because in the end, she's all we got when he cheated and decides to spend on his other family. Don't ever give your financial independence. Have a prenuptial agreement if you want it to be safer. Don't let husbands control you; he's there to protect not control.
Don't marry controlling men. Women control the dating place and look at the men they choose. Your mom destroyed your family with the help of her "husband"
Always the husband? Women are as toxic as men, do you live in a bubble?
Follow Jesus
She's way too good for him. You are a gorgeous, competent and lovely lady. I wish the best for you and your children.
That's why you have that conversation BEFORE the wedding. My husband & I had these talks early in our relationship; I wasn't going to waste my time with someone who didn't share similar views on family, career, etc
Her father could see what type of man her husband was
Women must be strong
Hey guys this is really important I noticed something at 4:38 when the light was directed at the girl's right eye so I really hope if someone tries to reachs out to them to get her eye checked because there is a type of eye cancer (retinoblastoma) that has the same symptoms when light is directed toward the eye. hopefully the girl has nothing but at least get her eye checked out. Please spread this message (from one of the concerned commenters)
This comment should be on top 😮
Are the children should raised by their mother alone? This husband said, 'as the child grows up, the mother has to be close to their children. Why are you trying to work that doesn't even cost money?' It is ridiculous. The representative Confucianism of Korea is that the wife should raise her children well and take care of her husband at home twenty four hours seven days a week. If a loved one loves her work, isn't it right to encourage her?
One of the reasons why cohabiting couples should allow themselves to be acquainted with each other first before having kids. Be open with your thoughts to each other. If your needs aren't met in that relationship, then it will be less complicated to consider taking a break
She should of listened to her Father. Her husband was not honest with her about a lot of things, he basically lied just to keep this woman smh
as bad as it may be, it may very well be the best she's capable of.
It's wonderful that he doesn't want her to work, but she needs to also be independent and he needs to give her more allowance to run a role of a house wife with ease.
you want her to spend more time to kids yet you dont even give her an allowance,your wife deserve more
Not every Korean guy is going to make you a main character of whatever K-Drama you're fantasizing about.
Sometimes a parent knows best....her father disapproved the marriage because he knew it wouldnt be the best life for his precious baby girl. So sad he passed away and shes unhappy.
This was 2018… Wondering how’s this family now…
They are only still together, because of the kids. It seems like a lifeless marriage, filled with shattered dreams, and deep regrets. They don’t look like a natural pairing, not even because of racial differences, just something seems off between them. I didn’t feel their love towards each other.
These are the impression I got from this video. For the kids sake, I do wish them the best.
I understand her feelings. I'm following my husband as well overseas. It must be hard for her, but she gave a really good example. She is a warrior and a super woman. I hope all the best for her.
I admire this man for coming up with a new way to provide for his family. Its really hard to find a job when your already old
Wow, this last part of the video is hard to watch. I cannot blame the wife for this as it was super hard for her to deal with the loss of her dad. I almost lost my dad after he was rushed to the hospital and stayed for almost a month and poor mom was stressed to the max and couldn't take it. Thankfully, I was there to take care of mom and visit dad a lot in the hospital. Thankfully, God saved my dad and he was discharged last week from the hospital and on the road to a full recovery at 89 years old........ultimately amazing!!