I was pregnant and now i'm not (I had a miscarriage)
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- Опубликовано: 20 май 2024
- *THIS IS NOT A PREGNANCY ANNOUNCEMENT*
TW: miscarriage/pregnancy loss
You may have been a little life but you are definitely not a little loss 👼🏼🤍
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✰ How old are you? 27
✰ Where are you from? I'm originally from England but moved to Adelaide, Australia when I was 9 years old. I also spent 2 years living in Toronto when I finished high school which is why the accent is a bit all over the place 😅
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Sweet Ella, like another woman on here said - your baby will always be your baby. And just know, 3 of 4 is the positive side of that statistic. Please don’t let this make you afraid going forward. You and Nick will have your rainbow baby and you will never seize to love your first little love and your first little life you created together. Sending so much love to you both. Alanah x
I'm so sorry, guys. A miscarriage is a pain and loss no one can understand unless they've gone through it. We lost 3 babies. One at 5 weeks, one at 9 weeks and one at 10 weeks. It's incredibly common but never spoken about. It's still so stigmatised.
My heart goes out to you both. Grieve, heal, and love each other xxx
Ella, I'm so, so sorry. Miscarriage is the most awful club that you don't know how large it is until you join. Thank you for talking about it- so many people suffer silently and don't know how to tell people what they are going through. Take the time you need to heal and grieve.
So true. I have lost 4 and until I went through it, I had no idea how many women in my own circle had been through it too since no one talked about it.
Oh, beautiful, I'm so sorry for your loss. I sent you a message on Instagram, but I wanted to share a bit more here. When I lost my baby, I felt very alone. What helped me was a vigil memorial service organized by the hospital. You might find comfort in doing something similar with your loved ones. Light a candle, read a poem or a letter, and say goodbye in your own way. Not knowing the sex was difficult, so I named my baby "Baby V." I went on to have two healthy baby girls, and I believe you will, too. My heart breaks for you but please know that i can empathise and resonate with what you're going through. God bless. xo
I’m praying for you. It is very very tough to get through & not a lot of people speak about pregnancy loss. I’m currently 24 weeks pregnant with my double rainbow baby & the pain from my previous losses never ceases. The farther along I get the more I think of them. I never forget. You can & will get through this. God will provide you a little bean in his timing & you’re gonna be so happy at the end. Stay strong, you’ve got this ❤
you should feel very proud of yourself for making this video and baring your soul for so many women to see ❤️ i hope your rainbow baby joins you soon Ella 🌈
I am so sorry for your loss Ella, thank you so much for sharing this with us and breaking the stigma around miscarriages. Your feelings are real and your baby was real and I hope you find comfort in that. God bless you and your family.
I’m so sorry. We had years of infertility struggles and three miscarriages in between our two beautiful babies. They are now 16 and 21 . Be kind to yourself. I’m so glad you have so much support around you. A lot of people don’t understand how devastating pregnancy loss is. I felt like people expected us to “get over it” quickly and not talk about it. You are helping many by talking publicly about it. Much love ❤️
Being someone that struggled with infertility for 7 years I resonated deeply with this and balled my eyes at this video. But, I have just had our 2nd rainbow bubby (we have had several losses one as late at 20 weeks) that we found out about when we were travelling through Spain.
There is no words, actions or anything that will take away this pain. But also, please know there will be brighter days ahead 🌈
Sending you all our love ❤️
I am so so sorry Ella. Thank you for being bold enough to share your story and I pray for you and Nick as you two navigate through this grief.
I’m so sorry, Ella. I had an early loss about a year after our daughter was born. And while that pregnancy was not a planned one, the loss of it rocked me (so much so that I avoided pregnancy as steadfastly as I could until very recently and our daughter is 3 now).
I’m so sorry you are having to experience this but you are not alone and we are all here to support you (both of you!).
I’m so sorry for your loss sweetheart! Myself last year I had a still born baby girl at 36 weeks. Loosing a baby is the most heartbreaking experience anyone will go through. I hope you find happiness and keep trying ❤
aww so sad. Lots of people go through it. everyone can support each other in tough times like this and you're right, its good to talk about it.
Sending so much love to you, it's such a heartbreaking loss. Take as much time as you need and know you're not alone.. those of us who have gone through it understand how shattering it is. 💔💔
Ella I'm so sorry to hear your sad news. It's heartbreaking. It's hard and you'll never forget it. Unfortunately it happens more than we realise. Thinking of you. Take care
Truly a profound heartbreak, I'm so sorry that you are going through this experience. Hope you are both taking good care of yourselves and each other. Please remember to give yourself grace during this healing time. Lots of love always ❤
I’m so sorry for your loss Ella. Thank you for sharing your story ❤
Oh Ella, my heart is broken for you guys!
I’m so sorry you have to go through that.
That truly is so fucking shit!
you two will definitely be parents one day and honestly the best freaking parents ever!! ❤
Much love Ella!!
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. The world just ends around you. And the next time is immediate anxiety.
I had four miscarriages and it’s so isolating. This time last year I was having my third loss. I can only say take the time to focus on healing and there is no linear line of grief. It comes in waves.
I’m so sorry for your loss Ella and Nick. Grieving the loss of a baby is so fricken hard but you will both get through it. All you can do is take one day at a time. Sending hugs and strength your way 💕
Oh Ella, my heart breaks for you. It's a terrible loss. Take your time to grieve. Thinking of you both x
I'm so sorry Hun! I cannot imagine your heartbreak. ❤ Thinking of you both! Prayers for peace and comfort in this tough time!
I'm so sorry you have experienced this. I teared up multiple times throughout the video. Sending love your way.
So sorry Ella. So sad I can’t imagine. Your time will come, take your time to heal and be together🩷
I'm so sorry you had to go through this. Take care and wishing you the very best.
This is so heartbreaking I am sending so much love to you and Nick. I can’t fathom how common this is. You are the 4th person I follow closely that has had a pregnancy loss/ miscarriage in the last week or so. 2 other women have had ectopic pregnancies and another who I actually went to primary school with also had a miscarriage. Thank you for sharing this and helping break the stigma.
Oh Ella. Big hugs. I’m so sorry that you and Nick have gone through this. I’m just so sorry.
I’m so sorry to hear this lovely.
In my experience when I had my loss between my two kids I felt numb also. It was one of the hardest things I ever had to get through. I had my eldest who was 18 months at the time so I think that helped me get through so much as I had my little blessing by my side.
The part I struggled with was trying again as I was so scared of experiencing loss again. So please allow yourself time to heal. It does take time but you’ll get there
I eventually felt comfortable in trying again and we thankfully fell with my rainbow boy who is now 8 months old
Thank you for sharing your journey. It’s really inspiring and encouraged me to just write this now and share mine.
Nick and yourself will make wonderful parents and I can’t wait to watch your journey when that day comes 🤎
So sad for you guys it’s heartbreaking losing a pregnancy. You’re so brave to talk about it as it’s often not spoken about. I too lost a pregnancy so I do understand how your feeling. Take your time feel all the emotions as it will help with the healing process. xx
Im so sorry you’ve had to go through this ❤
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Sending love and prayers to you and your family xx
So sorry for your loss Ella, thinking of you & Nick 🤍 Thank you for being so raw and speaking on this, it’s these conversations that help all women who have gone through this or will in future, to reach out. You will be wonderful parents in time x
Love and prayers for you both. Hope you heal and continue to strive together with comfort and patience. Thank you for sharing your story.
we all love you and nick so much!! please take your time on your healing journey 🤍🤍
I’m so sorry to hear your sad news, but I’m so so proud of you for speaking up about it.
Sending lots of love and strength to you both at this difficult time 💕
Oh Ella 😔 I’m sorry for your loss. Thankyou for bravely sharing your story x
So sorry for your loss Ella 😢 praying for you and Nick. Thank you for sharing this with us and normalising that a lot of woman go through this. I hope you start feeling better soon and I’m believing that your time will come ❤🌈
😭 I am so so sorry Ella. I admire your openness so much and my heart is with you both xxx
I've just had a miscarriage at 6 weeks too ❤ the instant you find our you're pregnant your start imagining your little human & life itself changes instantly as you start to mould your new future in your mind.
It's a grief like not other, mourning the loss of someone you felt you knew without ever getting the chance to meet them.
I wish you & Nick the best in your journey moving forward. Know that you CAN get pregnant, & that this time around unfortunately something was not quite right. But you keep trying!!!
I love your channel & your vulnerability ❤❤❤
You did so well to sit there and share this on here with such composure. So terribly sorry for your loss. I could really feel the pain in your voice and I hate that this has happened. Wishing things only go up from here. Sending you both my love. ❤
Sending love and healing vibes to you and Nick. This is fucked and not fair. Feel your feelings, be kind to yourself. And prepare your heart for your baby because they are on their way to you!
Sending you love and so proud of you for being so vulnerable and sharing such an important topic with others. It’s truly a selfless act and I know so many women will appreciate this more than you’ll ever know ❤❤❤
Thank you for sharing your story Ella and Nick ❤ sending all the love and strength as you heal xxxx
Sending love Ella and Nick. Take care of yourselves ❤️❤️❤️
My heart ABSOLUTELY breaks for you guys!!! These things are heartbreaking!!!! You and Nick WILL get your rainbow baby one day!!!! Sending you both SO MUCH love!!! ❤️🕊️🌈
I cried happy tears with you and sad tears with you. I can’t imagine what you’re going through Ella. Sending positivity your way and I want to thank you for sharing. I haven’t been through this personally but a lot of close friends have.
Hi Ella, I'm sorry you're going through this. I too had a miscarriage earlier this year. I found out at our first scan and I think that day and the way it felt finding out will always stay with me. Sending you lots of love and strength at this time x
We love you so much Ella ❤
Sending love to you and Nick❤ I haven’t gone through what you have but I do understand the grieving the life you were planning. It affects you so much more than we even realise. Sending massive hugs to you both and good girl pets to Mabel for being such a wonderful comfort ❤
Beautiful sweet Ella I am so sorry to hear of you loss sending you and Nick so much strength and love 💕 Thank you for opening up and talking about an awful but a unfortunately a very common thing. Seeing the love and joy between you and Nick when you found out was so beautiful and I’m sure in time you will both get to experience that again. Keep taking the time to grieve and heal but don’t lose hope. Lots of love to you and Nick
I just came across this video on my feed so I haven’t seen any previous videos of yours. But I am so sorry you experienced this. I had a miscarriage at 16 weeks with my second son on 4/12/2023. It changed me drastically in the way I view pregnancy for myself & it’s only taken me now, over a year later, to be able to watch anything related to pregnancy loss. It was one of the worst, traumatic experiences I’ve lived through & I am sorry that you have to experience it too. As fresh as it seems, it does get easier. Not better. But easier. I am now almost 37 weeks with a babygirl. I wish you all the best love & healing ❤
Ella I have been watching your videos for years (before you were in Canada behindthesmile etc!) and have always appreciated how open and honest you are with your life and now you were so strong in letting us known what is going on .I am so sorry for your loss this is a quote that has personally helped me in my journey the past couple of months and hope it brings you some peace “How very softly you tiptoed into our world, almost silently, only a moment you stayed. But what an imprint your footsteps have left upon our hearts.”
sending my love to you and Nick xx
Ella. I am so sorry for your loss. My bestie had a similar experience last year and it’s really hard. You are not alone, and it will happening again when the timing is right. Take the time you need to process, moments to be sad, etc and when you’re ready you have so many people here and in your daily life to show you whatever form of support you need.
It’s so very brave of you to share your experience. So many women don’t or can’t and so we don’t realise how many people have experienced this. It will help more than you know. Sending so much love and I just know it will happen for you and Nick and when it does we can’t wait to share in it xx
I sat here in tears the whole time, my absolutely heart breaks for you both. Sending you both all my love. 💗🌈
Sending you so so much Love Ella 🤍🤍🤍
My heart breaks for you Ella + Nick. Thankyou for being brave to share and explain how it feels so that it becomes less “taboo” for others as it is sadly very common. ❤
Literally crying with you watching this, I’m so sorry for your loss 🥺 what’s meant to be will be, everything happens for a reason 🩷
Sending so much love to you and your family. Please take the time you need ❤️ even if it’s randomly in two months or 5 years. Losses like this are hard. It’s very brave of you to talk about it.
Sending you both so much love, and strength to get through this very challenging time, Ella. Life is full of so many ups and downs ❤ BIG hugs to Mable for being such a sweet, sweet girl XO
Sending the biggest virtual hug to you both ❤️🩹
Sending so much love, I can't imagine what you're feeling right now
I almost chose not to watch this because I’m so sad for you. A great fear come to life. I’m so sorry this happened ❤
Sending all the love to you both during this tough time. May you find healing and comfort during this tough time and know you’re very loved. I’m so sorry this has happened.💕
Ella you’re one incredible gal. Feel all the feelings but you’re so very loved. ❤
Sending you and nick so much love ❤🥺
Oh I’m so sorry to hear that hun , it will happen xx
Ella and Nick, so sorry to hear this has happened but I'm a firm believer in signs and agree that the 🌈 means something... Incredibly brave to share your story and even though I personally haven't been through this, my close friends have and I'm so glad you have amazing friends and family around you to support .. your audience (including me) will be here and ready to virtually support when needed ❤
Oh Ella and Nick.. I'm crying..so sorry yous had to go thu this...may God heal you..have faith all will be well..x❤
Sending so much love to you and Nick. I am so sorry Ella :(
You are so brave. Sending you so much love ❤
My heart is breaking for you but your honesty and openness is truly incredible. ❤
Im so so sorry for you both, I am heartbroken for your loss. I’m sending you all the healing vibes in the world and I hope you get your rainbow baby soon ❤
Thank you for sharing your precious little one with us ❤ I’m so sorry, Nick and Ella. Much love
I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending hugs to you both ❤
Absolutely bawled the entire time watching this. From the start to finish, felt all the emotions.
The both of you have been in my thoughts ever since you posted on Instagram the other day, and I haven’t stopped thinking about you guys. I am sending all my baby dust known to mankind to both of you ♥️♥️♥️♥️
I am so sorry for your loss Ella, your rainbow baby will come and when it does it will be incredibly special. Sending love to you and Nick ❤🌈💐
Hi Ella! I’m sending you two love! So sorry for your loss ❤
Praying for you in this time❤❤❤
sending you and nick so much love ❤
So sorry for you both. Glad you feel loved and supportive.
I’m so sorry you and Nick are going through this😭 Angel baby is working on your rainbow no doubt🌈🤍 lots of love and cuddles to you!
So sorry for you both, but so glad that you have each other and an amazing support system to help ease the pain ❤❤
all my love and support for both of you 💕
I’m so sorry for your loss I feel so much pain watching how much your heart hurts ❤️ sending so much love ❤️
I’m so sorry for your loss Ella. Sending you and Nick so much love ❤
I am so, so sorry for your loss. Sending much love 🤍
Sending you guys so much love, you will be ok and this is just one of those moments in life that really sucks. Every emotion you’re feeling is totally normal. Allow yourself to feel them and realise they are waves that come and go. Your time will come and you’re going to make great parents ❤
I’m so so sorry guys 😢 sending so much love and support to you both and your families ❤
Im so sorry for your loss. Sending all my love ❤
Sending all my love Ella ♥️🫶🏼
I don‘t know you but I send you so so much love my dear 🥺❤️ you will get through this and you will get your rainbow baby soon enough, maybe it just wasn‘t the right time, as dumb as that sounds, but the universe always has a plan. You got this, women are so strong ❤️
I just want to thank you so much for sharing this - 100% no pressure for you to however I appreciate it from the bottom of my heart that you are trying to break the stigma for us mamas xx
You for sure will have your time and have the most amazing little family!
The numbness and blame is so so so normal however please don’t blame yourself too much x
When i lost our baby i found it helpful to come to terms with by realising there was a reason as to why we were not meant to have that baby earthside and made me feel a bit of comfort in that horrible time ❤
Sending so much love to you and Nick 🌈
I’m so so sorry 💙
Please know that nothing you did or didn’t do caused this. I’ve gone through a few losses myself, and it’s hard to believe that statement, but it’s true. You did nothing to cause this. It’s not your fault, and please try your best not to blame yourself.
Make sure to take the time you need to process everything💙
My heart goes out to you both & I’m sending you so much love & so many hugs 💙
Thank you for sharing your story 💙
You and Nick are in my thoughts and prayers ❤❤
I’m so sorry darling. Sending you so much love ❤❤❤
I'm sorry for your loss
I’m so sorry sweetheart. Sending love to you both from Barossa Valley xo
Oh Ella I'm so, so sorry!! This was an incredibly brave and raw video to post, you're incredible and I'm thinking of you and Nick ❤
This was the best news ever in regards to you finding out you're pregnant! Such a big milestone along your journey and a huge life event. I cannot wait for you and Nick to be parents, you'll be amazing parents! I'm also very sorry for yours and Nicks loss, it's a huge loss and I'm glad you both have each other to lean on and Mabel moo. You's are doing great at life and are smashing out your goals! Your babies coming! Just know that, you's are both doing so well, they will come when the time is right! I'm very proud of you Ella for wanting to talk about your miscarriage and thankful that you wanted to share that with all of us here. Sending loves of love to you both.
Ella my heart breaks for you and Nick 🥺😔 what an incredibly hard thing to go through. I’m sending all my love and strength your way 🩷 look after yourself gorgeous girl ❤️