I have realize that no matter what job that I take, I hate working around people and dealing with different personalities. Its draining and downright annoying the hell out of me. I suffer from moodiness and bipolar that may have alot to do with it, but I have always been like this. Not much of a peoples person and very private. I dont like talking and putting myself out there to talk to anyone. I find that people in the workplace are being fake, half of the time they do not like the job or being at work themselves. We are humans not robots. We will not be happy 24/7 about going to work.
Every job has some amount of bullshit. Some days are better than others. I try just to do what I can and leave work at work. I don't give a flying shit If I am not perfect.
What I hate about work is the discomfort of adjusting to new people in a new work, or mingling with people in an old work, so basically the same as you, an introvert and keeping to myself all the time. I'm stressed at work ever since I started working around 20 plus years ago, but what can I do? If I don't work, I won't have anything to pay the bills. Looking back, I should have been a vet or a builder instead.
@mina This is the best book I have ever read - nay - experienced. Crisp points saying the things perhaps you know, but from totally different perspectives. I have heard lots of discourses on spirituality, but they remained just that - discourses. It is in fact a crime to think that this is spirituality because it is not: it is the way everyone of us needs to live. I completed the book in a couple of days of reading end-to-end. I knew this is a treasure which needed to be read in pieces still couldn't resist finishing - that is first reading of course. I have now started reading in small pieces with full contemplation as advised by Mr. Anderson One thing for sure: this is one book which must be read over & over again. Years of conditioning needs to be weaved away ever so gently. New beginning awaits you. There is no age to begin. I am spreading the book purely because I don't want people to miss such a vital opportunity that they can ever get in their life. And before death. Spread the message, gift the book if you can. I am sure you can. p.s. name of this book is "kit for emotional stability" by Daniel Anderson
okay honestly im impressed. i came here so stressed i felt like i need to throw up. and now im doing pretty good. my problem is that i identify myself with my job which you mentioned too. that if i do something wrong it means theres something wrong with me. or that the opinion of somene else means something about me. and the outcome... thats the other thing. if i dont manage to do my job well or do it at all because i feel drained, what happens then? i wont have money to pay my rent, land on the streets. thats the worst thing to happen i guess but if i end up on the streets i may meet some true friends that dont like me for my money, learn more about life, start to value my freedom, have the time to travel. maybe i experience something that inspires me to write a good book. make a fortune... its true, how do i know? maybe if i let go of this "control" life could get more exciting. i will be lead somewhere unknown
Thanku so much I watched it while going to work and i was totally stressed. watching your video made my day, whole new experience for me. I did my work stress free thinking I'll give my 100% no matter what other say whether my boss like my work or not.
You nailed it! Throughout all of my schooling and jobs I always felt that feeling stress was some kind of requirement for doing a good job. This has exhausted me most of my life. I'm so glad someone like you can corroborate that it doesn't have to be that way. Thank you.
Thank you so sooo much Noah, I watch this video all the time whenever I feel I can't handle the stress anymore and preventing me from sleeping for days worrying about job loss or my manager. Your words are calming and your advise spot on.
Thanks a lot for this. I'm 17 and work at mcdoanlds which obviously isn't as stressful as most of your jobs, but it's my first proper job. I get tics (involuntary muscle spasms) when I get very stressed and it gets quite bad, which makes me feel more self conscious and stressed. I think this video is going to help me a lot and I'm going to keep these tips in mind every time I feel like I'm going to get stressed
Noah your videos get me through life. As do your live sessions. I’m watching this video now after a very stressful day at work when a superior insulted me and told me how bad of a job I’m doing, when I bend over backwards for my company
hey dont worry im here :) try listening to relaxing music, take deep breaths, exercise, meditation. music is on the recent trend of stress relief. also focus on the positives, i know its easier said than done. sometimes there is no positive, but you have to focus on the end result, the light at the end of the tunnel. i used to have a hell of time at school but i focused on getting home and having a game, meeting a friend, drink etc.
Thanks for this, as an IT developer I am always trying to create the 'perfect' solutions and I do very well at it - however when I am criticised I feel hurt. This has really helped - thumbs up!
hey i am the same, it does hurt when someone says something negative. i make art but some people do criticise it to, its not easy dealing wih rejection. however there always a way to deal with it, focus on the positive. i know its easier said than done, if you really feel like going into a different environment etc you should. sometimes your environment just isnt cutting it, or maybe you need constant breaks from work.
thank you, Noah! listening to your talks lessens my stress and worries. you are like a friend who gives me a lot of comfort. its good to have people like you. take care
awesome video. I felt calmer by the end of it. My stress arises when more requests come in than I can handle. And they are all urgent. Lord have mercy! How do I stop myself from having that kind of reaction and heart palpitations. I have this fear of being asked why is this not done, and them not seeing that I've been working so hard doing other things. Thank you in advance for any further tips. God bless you.
I respond after 4 years but of well, maybe it will help someone. Here we go: 1) Saying no to a task, or to delegate it to someone else, or saying "If I take this one on, then this one and this one you asked me before won't be made before that day" is respectable, it is not seen as not being organized, on the contrary, it means you have time-management skills. 2) The more tasks you take on, the more your bosses will give you. And it's not because your boss is mean and want to cause you stress. Saying yes to everything and always finishing them on time (working overtime to do so even) only tells your boss you have time (or willingness) to do all this. It won't give him or her a sense of the workload you deal with. It actually doesn't help your manager to always say yes. The only thing it creates is a big blind spot for the boss, him or her thinking "X can probably takes this on, he never mention he's too busy". Communication is key. Just as you wouldn't do everything at home without asking your partner to help, you shouldn't stay silent at work on things that affect you and that you don't find fair. No matter what people give you, always say: "ok, it looks like it's an urgent one, I'm working on this, this, this and this for you, which one do I put on the back-burner to work on this new one, because one of them won't be delivered on time if I start working on this. Or is there anyone else who can help this time, maybe?" Let the manager make the decision about what needs to be ditched, or postponed or given to someone else. You sometimes don't have all the cards in your hands to make that decision anyways. 3) Saying yes to everything works against you. If you are doing the work 2 people should be doing, then you are overworked and probably can't even take some days off because no one is able to cover for you. You are basically shooting yourself in the foot. Find your manager, have a little chat over coffee, tell them what you are working on, and give them a hint that maybe it is time to hire a second person if they want this to be sustainable. Because the day you're sick more than one day: they are FUCKED. No manager wants to be fucked. Not all managers are good listeners though. So when it's not your thoughts but the situation itself that causes you stress and that your manager don't listen to what you have to say: it's time to update your resume, shop around, find another job and then quit. Just the PERSPECTIVE of an exit door will brighten your final months or weeks at work. But find a job while you still have one (it's easier because you won't reek despair in interviews that way). Best to all of you!
In terms of mindset: A really good frame that I’ve learned is to see this as fear of the future in general. You can only ever control and experience the present moment, and your mind will TRY to predict the future based on past experiences (this is a survival mechanism for humans). These predictions are, most of the time, inaccurate and based on fear. So what I do is remind myself that the anxious emotions are from an imagined future event which isn’t 100% guaranteed to happen not an actual event right here right now (even if it’s happened before). The anxiety we experience comes from the anticipation of an event we have labelled as negative. Try to find a way to reframe it as a positive I.e. “when someone comes over to me to check up, they’re helping me to work more efficiently and they know I can perform at a higher rate, so they’re supporting me” - little reframes like this help A LOT On a more practical note: If you feel like you’re getting too many requests then perhaps flag it up to your manager and proactively show them all the work you’ve been doing so they know you’re working as hard as you are! Hope this helps :)
"The only thing that creates stress is thoughts about work". Yes, but those thoughts are grounded in at least some reality. Ergo, this particular task is out of my range of ability or this job I should have dealt with a long time ago or I'm so deep into a problem and now can't dig myself out.
Practically did Not listen to what you were saying until last 2 mins of video: "you don't know what the outcome would be if things don't work the way you want them to work". This resonates with me..... I just move my business into Newer & bigger place but things are Not going as smoothly as I wanted. Every new challenge sends me into fear, & I wish I could sell and run away. Just thought I d share & see if any feedback. Thnkuuuuuuu
Hannah Banana don't worry I have been bullied befor it's horrible and ur not alone don't worry and keep your head high god things will happen to those are good 😊 and bad things will happen to those who are mean and bad things will get better promise I do to sometimes just say I'm your head I don't give a shit what others think about me xx things will get better xxxxxxx
Hey Noah. This was a shockingly good video. I'm starting a new job in two weeks after taking close to a year off to recover from a brain injury. My tolerance for handling stress is much lower now, thanks for these tools!
Nice video Noah. I feel stressed in my new job because I feel like my boss is making fun of me/doesn't think I can handle myself for tasks. I hope I can get through it.
I work as a nurse for almost 4 years after now, and I still have trouble handling the workload between actual patient care and documentation that is becoming more and more stressful. I have anxiety and have not been able to sleep. I hear what you are saying but having someone's life in my hand adds another layer to this anxiety I have. I want to know if it is still the same kind of stress you are talking about.
I hear all the time nursing is stressful and I'm not even a nurse. Have you considered psychiatric nursing? At least you wouldn't feel like you have someone's life in your hands?
I can understand where you are coming from, which is why i do not take jobs or careers like that. Its stressful and you have to be mentally prepared to deal with it because if not you will only stress yourself out and cause even more anger to yourself.
You have constructed my thoughts in details and i hope i could use this knowledge to cope with the current environment that creates stress for me as well as my own consciousness to be better at what i am doing as a junior sales mgr. Thank you
Thank you, this spoke to me and it was very helpful in coming to a realization of why I was stressed and how success or failure had nothing to say about myself, but that I should "just do my best and see what will happen." I am very thankful, Thank you!
Sometimes when im really stressed at work i like to remember that me and everyone at work are tiny organisms clinging to a spinning rock in space. We are all going to one day cease to exist, from the receptionist up to oh so important CEO... so why take such trivial work issues seriously. Just take a step back and recognise the absurdity of your own worries in the grand context of yours and everyone elses existence. There is really nothing in life to worry about, least of all some bullshit corporate paycheck.
Im working in a kitchen so i want to learn to cook but im afraid anytime im doing something i might be late or moving slow.. while the managers want me to do it fast.. They hold me a speech about that im not good at being an general assistant in this hotel im working, i do mixed jobs.. till they said im not good for anything.. but slowly i got used to it.. but i still have alot to learn and im still stressed that i might do mistakes again. They are so strict but I hope I'll be capable to learn asap! I have almost 4 weeks here! I am thinking positive but sometimes when we have alot of orders it's diffiicult, Im confused with what to start. Im afraid that they'll hold me a speech again. Anyway you're right.. but sometimes i can control my stress but sometimes i might end up crying... and makes me depressed
Carmen BD kitchens are stressful no doubt, but what I've learned is that you gotta take your time and it'll come. You'll pick up tips and tricks that'll make you faster and improve the kitchen. I get speeches too, and I've been doing this for years. It happens when you make mistakes. You're human. It's what you learn from those mistakes that improve you. You can also watch other employees and see what they do. That way you're watching what a skilled employee brings and you can mock their actions till you're doing what they're doing like muscle memory. I hope this helped a little but I feel you and I am stressed as well. Kitchens are high stress
@@lizvn6492 hi there I've been in that place just 6 months. They were treating us like slaves Now I got a job in accounting. Its def way better than what I did, still stressful but getting there!
Thank you. I work as a DSP1 and I deal with clients/residents with BEhaviors/Intellectual disabilities and eating disorders. My problem is not really the residents it's the workers. We have a lot of people who are just nagging all the time and always rude and hateful. The residents sometimes destroy our things like cars, they destroy property on campus and they cause many people to get into trouble. BUT the benefits, pay is better than many jobs locally. Many people drive 2 hours just to work here. BUT I also had to switch shifts because I need to get more education so I can get out of being DSP1 it's such a hard job. They expect us to work 16 -22 hours . We are always short handed people come there train for a month then get paid then quit. Or they all quit at same time. Last week we lost 3 people on our home. One was on vacation and another calls in all the time. Today I worked 11.50 hours and It was my day off. I hope that I can get my degree finished and try my best to leave this place I really can't stand working there. BUT I need the money and I was working indepently for years and I loved that but it was harder to make money in the economy and I was just loosing my motivation and momentum . I like not having to worry about marketing, ads, contracts etc. BUt you're right. thank you again... this is what I needed to hear.
This video was very helpful. I used to make my quotos in the past 7 years but now new mgr is expcting more. For the past 3 months straight, i am told I'm not making my numbers. I've tried different remedies to push myself but cannot make these new unreachable numbers. I say they're unreachable because only 3 of 9 people are reaching those numbers. My direct supervision says im not doing the best that i can. Please note that we've lost 3 coworkers and the remaining 9 are doing additional work than before. Listening to your video, i recognize that i put down myself and think im not good enough and lately been thinking i could lose my job. I do my job well but my supervisor is constantly bringing me down because she has pressure from the new management. I will try to teach my mind not to listen to her discouragement and continue to do my as i half best, but its difficult when its happening everyday. Im having work nightmares and anxiety. One thing is true is when you're constantly doubting yourself, you cannot do the best you can. Ill stop here. I know that was a lot.
Some great ideas & logic. I have put this in my favourites, subscribed & sent to some off my "allied comrades" at work. Keep up the good work & thank you
When he asked if i am stressed every single moment and im sitting here in my second semester of physics in germany. And yes. Absolutely. Every single moment 😂
I think my situation is harder to understand as it is not the Work itself or the boss... but it is the bosses Blatant favoritism and unfairness that is seen by others.
I'm certainly at a work crossroads right now and have been in a make or break talk with my boss about my stress. This video has helped me realise I can focus on keeping anxiety at bay. I look forward to watching your others. Thank you
just a thought. I wrote make or break & then realised my boss never said that, I did just then! Thinking of scenarios ahead of events yet to happen. Grrrrr! See how easy it is to keep switching to the same mindset!
My problem was I’m in a new team at work and working even longer hours I finish at 6 get home around 7 and it just stresses me out I don’t see my old friends from work any more and I have different breaks it’s just upsetting
Wow its cool. I was very stressed because of my office work. When I watch this video, I realised who I am and what I should do. Thank you very much. Cheers.
I really needed this thanks mate, Pro tip smile even if things sucks just smile it allways helps me really try it, your in a bad mood high stress push a smile and feel the joy Dopemins hit you ahhh
I work in a corporate company where the workload is just crazy. So many meetings, emails and data processing, reporting metrics, managing 2 teams in different locations, traveling every day in traffic jams (yes, it’s LA). I literally enter my office and my heart rate is 100, then I open my email (Pandora’s inbox, 100 emails every morning even when I work late the previous day) and I see all the firefighting that I need to do all is rush and prioritized, nothing can wait, phone calls. Back to back meetings with managers, then there’s literally no time to read the emails or implement solutions. Ruminating after work and worrying about projects I was not able to finish that day due to high workload. It’s killing me slowly and managers act like there’s still more eork that needs to be done quickly on top of that. It’s corporate hell job. I’ve been enduring this ordeal for $ but coming to the point of realization life is dripping through my fingers and health is more important. I have to make a change. I try to start my own budiness but have literally zero mental energy to even contemplate it. Thank you for this video!
I thought it would be best for me to be with this great guy, so I started thinking about him for two days straight. Turned out it made me really sad because he wasn't the one who could make me happy (only I could do that). So I searched RUclips for some help because I really felt terrible and now I'm sitting here learning these amazing lessons from you... So you're very right, you don't know if somethings will be good for you. Time will tell. Thanks
i know its been 2 years since you posted that but a while ago i thought i was with the perfect guy, thought we'd marry and have kids. it turned out he was a dick, made me unhappy, put me down, lied to me .... im much better off without him and i cant rely on others to make me happy
Jesus. That was fantastic. I analyzed so much from it. I'll still give 110% in my job, but i'm not gonna do it in terms of stress. Whether i win or fail, i'm trying my best! I noticed my intention was wrong in the first place. Just to be enough in my job was my flaw in reasoning. But if i get good news or bad news, so mnay variables are in place. And how do i know it's best for me? I don't! I try my best. And that's what matters.:)
I get anxiety before I have to go to work because in afraid to deal with my co workers because they treat me like I don't know what I'm doing. My job I have no rest at all and then gives me more anxiety because I want to rest before work and I can't. It's hurt because my co workers only pick on me and it makes me want to quit my job....
A great video I will have to return to in bite sized pieces. Your approach is great. A recurring challenge for my stress is being unprepared for a situation leaving me unable to respond and feeling stress. This happens often when I am positioned within a group or network that is not a good fit. This slowly embodies low esteem and sensitivity to touchy subjects and in rare situations a nasty defence response. I will put time into your videos. Thank you for creating them.
Hi Noah! I have a question about the second cause of anxiety. I feel that I need to know why is causes anxiety. If I think I know what is good or bad for me, why does that cause anxiety? And I wanted to share my new thoughts for anyone else who may resonate with them. "Good work doesn't mean I'm valuable, it just means I did my job. Doing my job doesn't mean I worthy, it just means I did my job. Not being able to do my job doesn't mean I'm worthless, it just means I struggled to do my job. Not being able to contribute because I have high anxiety doesn't mean I'm worthless, it just means I struggle to contribute when I have high anxiety. Bringing down the mood of my workplace because I'm stressed out doesn't mean I'm unworthy, it just means I brought down the mood of my workplace because I'm stressed out."
I just recently got promoted to a new position and i get alot of stress out of it and my Boss. Thank you for making this video it made me feel better. ^_^
Thats why I do not take promotions or jobs where it will be stressful on me. I could care less about the money anymore, my happiness is more important to me than working nonstop and being miserable.
Leyah McMillan Same personally. As I learned being an intern where I had my first job that I personally love and wish to be with them the most, the only thing that made me happy is the task that I can really do that is more straightforward and I can do better for it. While I put money second as I also like those yhings, but personally I don't think those things as I miss those than dealing with internships right now that I just can't do it anymore.
I'm hearing two main takeaways 1) your work doesn't define you so don't take it personal whether you do good or bad 2) you think you know what is best for you in your life but you don't know (let go of control)
i am nurse fresh graduate. im tagging with my seniour. my senior was so scary. she keep push me to work fast but im a learner need time. but she dont bother that. she keep yelling me to faster n i am cant focus. i cant learn. but im just do my best. sometimes i cant cope with my situation
Awesome video! I just started working as a cashier and I often find myself stressing so hard over that job because one moment, I'm doing a good job and I think to myself that I can do this job well and then the next day, when I actually mess up, I get extremely upset and think to myself that I can't do the job at all and I should quit before things get too bad. So, I guess for now on, I should just think about doing the best I can and not worry about whether or not I'm good at this job if I messed up.
Spot on, for me. Way too much thought, way too much "it means something about me, my worth". I know this, intellectually. This is one I need/HAVE to implement. Whew . . .
Thanks Noah thanks for the video now that you helped me kill off this problem I'm all good now I was the first one on oh my boss hates my work I'm horrible take care Noah and thank s a lot bro stay real :)
(WARNING, LONG VENT, didn't mean to vent here but it just kept typing and there's no turning back now. Context is that I'm 17 working at a super busy fast food place. It's my second/third job. I've experienced similar stress patterns at different jobs before. ) I'm kinda here at this video because i work at a really busy fast food place and I'm starting to realize that my social anxiety will very much get in the way of everything that I do while working there. However I don't want to let my family down as theyd believe I'm just lazy or not trying hard enough, it's really not helping when they tell me to just " Don't stress" And " You'll be fine, just relax" Cuz I feel like it's not an option. By the time I will relax there is always something else I have to focus on etc. And I'll be dead honest it's really breaking me down at this point, even right now it's my day off and I'm just constantly thinking about my next shift and about all the mistakes I'm making. I've been there for only a month but because of the current world situation of 2020 and corona, things are getting 10 times more busier, my manager keeps begging me to speed up immediately and not make mistakes. I've already been warned that I have 1-2 more weeks to improve or otherwise I might have to look for something else. However I tend to worry about making mistakes all the time or try to pressure myself to improve my speed but Ethier way I'll make a huge mistake that can really cost them and I will take full responsibility for it. I understand why they are putting pressure on me because of reopening due to corona and stuff.i haven't got much time left to practice before things get absolutely crazy at my job from how busy it will get. But I just don't know anymore. I just don't know what to do or where else to properly say this stuff because I'm constantly stressed and tense all the time at work. Im unsure if its just because it's fast food and maybe I need to try something else or maybe I'm at fault here, maybe my anxiety is too much? I'm sorry if I seem like I'm fishing for advice in a random comment section but I just wanted to put this out there, just somewhere I guess. Maybe it can help let go at least 1% of it all. I thank you a lot if someone reads it to this far cuz tbh I do feel better already thank you. - malakai
Im stressed because my boss/colleges are very disorganised and always create a mess which I have to clear up. And they don't usually tell me how and when I need to clear up their mess when I'm not sure how.
I think in your case instead of having to clean up after other people need to stand up for yourself be like hey I did my part by cleaning I need you to do your part by cleaning I've been in this case before when I worked in up food and beverage department and they would make me clean up after everybody and then one day I was like hey this is not my job to clean up after everybody else my job is clean my area not everybody's so please can you do your part by cleaning yours it's best to just try to stick up for yourself. and if that does not work the manager should know the role of each person and you can bring it to the manager and they will straighten out the person.
Hey Noah, I have a complex question regarding a certain person I work with. I work with someone who has to do their job in order for me to do my job, like a "hand off" situation, however I'm constantly going back to them and asking them to correct their work so I can properly move forward with my work. Neither my boss OR their boss is taking any corrective action, pretty much ignoring it. At this point, I just want to not let it bother me, but the aggravation jams up my work load and sometimes keeps me up at night, given I'm the only one impacted by it and I'm astonished by how unfair the situation is being treated, or untreated since no one seems to care accept me. Maybe you can show me how to not let this person bother, as your other videos pretty much saved my life. Thanks!
one of the best video that help me deal with my business problem. ty noah , i never realize that i was always trying to prove myself as a good successful businessman :D
Excellent!! And so well said...Thank you for helping me look at things differently and questioning assumptions I can make. I look forward to watching your other videos :)
I have realize that no matter what job that I take, I hate working around people and dealing with different personalities. Its draining and downright annoying the hell out of me. I suffer from moodiness and bipolar that may have alot to do with it, but I have always been like this. Not much of a peoples person and very private. I dont like talking and putting myself out there to talk to anyone. I find that people in the workplace are being fake, half of the time they do not like the job or being at work themselves. We are humans not robots. We will not be happy 24/7 about going to work.
LeyahDMV _ McMillan damn you r fine babe. do you like black men sugar plum?
Every job has some amount of bullshit. Some days are better than others. I try just to do what I can and leave work at work. I don't give a flying shit If I am not perfect.
What I hate about work is the discomfort of adjusting to new people in a new work, or mingling with people in an old work, so basically the same as you, an introvert and keeping to myself all the time. I'm stressed at work ever since I started working around 20 plus years ago, but what can I do? If I don't work, I won't have anything to pay the bills. Looking back, I should have been a vet or a builder instead.
thats why im gonna be self-employed
@mina
This is the best book I have ever read - nay - experienced. Crisp points saying the things perhaps you know, but from totally different perspectives. I have heard lots of discourses on spirituality, but they remained just that - discourses. It is in fact a crime to think that this is spirituality because it is not: it is the way everyone of us needs to live.
I completed the book in a couple of days of reading end-to-end. I knew this is a treasure which needed to be read in pieces still couldn't resist finishing - that is first reading of course.
I have now started reading in small pieces with full contemplation as advised by Mr. Anderson
One thing for sure: this is one book which must be read over & over again. Years of conditioning needs to be weaved away ever so gently.
New beginning awaits you. There is no age to begin. I am spreading the book purely because I don't want people to miss such a vital opportunity that they can ever get in their life. And before death.
Spread the message, gift the book if you can. I am sure you can.
p.s. name of this book is "kit for emotional stability" by Daniel Anderson
okay honestly im impressed. i came here so stressed i felt like i need to throw up. and now im doing pretty good. my problem is that i identify myself with my job which you mentioned too. that if i do something wrong it means theres something wrong with me. or that the opinion of somene else means something about me.
and the outcome... thats the other thing. if i dont manage to do my job well or do it at all because i feel drained, what happens then? i wont have money to pay my rent, land on the streets. thats the worst thing to happen i guess
but if i end up on the streets i may meet some true friends that dont like me for my money, learn more about life, start to value my freedom, have the time to travel. maybe i experience something that inspires me to write a good book. make a fortune... its true, how do i know?
maybe if i let go of this "control" life could get more exciting. i will be lead somewhere unknown
Thanku so much
I watched it while going to work and i was totally stressed. watching your video made my day, whole new experience for me. I did my work stress free thinking I'll give my 100% no matter what other say whether my boss like my work or not.
You nailed it! Throughout all of my schooling and jobs I always felt that feeling stress was some kind of requirement for doing a good job. This has exhausted me most of my life. I'm so glad someone like you can corroborate that it doesn't have to be that way. Thank you.
Corrie-Anne Burton You're welcome Corrie. Glad it helped clear things up
Thank you so sooo much Noah, I watch this video all the time whenever I feel I can't handle the stress anymore and preventing me from sleeping for days worrying about job loss or my manager. Your words are calming and your advise spot on.
Thanks a lot for this. I'm 17 and work at mcdoanlds which obviously isn't as stressful as most of your jobs, but it's my first proper job. I get tics (involuntary muscle spasms) when I get very stressed and it gets quite bad, which makes me feel more self conscious and stressed. I think this video is going to help me a lot and I'm going to keep these tips in mind every time I feel like I'm going to get stressed
Noah your videos get me through life. As do your live sessions. I’m watching this video now after a very stressful day at work when a superior insulted me and told me how bad of a job I’m doing, when I bend over backwards for my company
i had a really bad day today this made me understand about my situation
hey dont worry im here :) try listening to relaxing music, take deep breaths, exercise, meditation. music is on the recent trend of stress relief. also focus on the positives, i know its easier said than done. sometimes there is no positive, but you have to focus on the end result, the light at the end of the tunnel. i used to have a hell of time at school but i focused on getting home and having a game, meeting a friend, drink etc.
Thanks for this, as an IT developer I am always trying to create the 'perfect' solutions and I do very well at it - however when I am criticised I feel hurt.
This has really helped - thumbs up!
Hi Jagara1, I'm glad that it was helpful for you.
hey i am the same, it does hurt when someone says something negative. i make art but some people do criticise it to, its not easy dealing wih rejection. however there always a way to deal with it, focus on the positive. i know its easier said than done, if you really feel like going into a different environment etc you should. sometimes your environment just isnt cutting it, or maybe you need constant breaks from work.
thank you, Noah! listening to your talks lessens my stress and worries. you are like a friend who gives me a lot of comfort. its good to have people like you. take care
awesome video. I felt calmer by the end of it. My stress arises when more requests come in than I can handle. And they are all urgent. Lord have mercy! How do I stop myself from having that kind of reaction and heart palpitations. I have this fear of being asked why is this not done, and them not seeing that I've been working so hard doing other things. Thank you in advance for any further tips. God bless you.
You and me both!
Just accept a realistic number of request and politely postpone or decline the rest.If it gets to much leave the job
I respond after 4 years but of well, maybe it will help someone. Here we go:
1) Saying no to a task, or to delegate it to someone else, or saying "If I take this one on, then this one and this one you asked me before won't be made before that day" is respectable, it is not seen as not being organized, on the contrary, it means you have time-management skills.
2) The more tasks you take on, the more your bosses will give you. And it's not because your boss is mean and want to cause you stress. Saying yes to everything and always finishing them on time (working overtime to do so even) only tells your boss you have time (or willingness) to do all this. It won't give him or her a sense of the workload you deal with. It actually doesn't help your manager to always say yes. The only thing it creates is a big blind spot for the boss, him or her thinking "X can probably takes this on, he never mention he's too busy". Communication is key. Just as you wouldn't do everything at home without asking your partner to help, you shouldn't stay silent at work on things that affect you and that you don't find fair.
No matter what people give you, always say: "ok, it looks like it's an urgent one, I'm working on this, this, this and this for you, which one do I put on the back-burner to work on this new one, because one of them won't be delivered on time if I start working on this. Or is there anyone else who can help this time, maybe?"
Let the manager make the decision about what needs to be ditched, or postponed or given to someone else. You sometimes don't have all the cards in your hands to make that decision anyways.
3) Saying yes to everything works against you. If you are doing the work 2 people should be doing, then you are overworked and probably can't even take some days off because no one is able to cover for you. You are basically shooting yourself in the foot. Find your manager, have a little chat over coffee, tell them what you are working on, and give them a hint that maybe it is time to hire a second person if they want this to be sustainable. Because the day you're sick more than one day: they are FUCKED. No manager wants to be fucked.
Not all managers are good listeners though. So when it's not your thoughts but the situation itself that causes you stress and that your manager don't listen to what you have to say: it's time to update your resume, shop around, find another job and then quit. Just the PERSPECTIVE of an exit door will brighten your final months or weeks at work.
But find a job while you still have one (it's easier because you won't reek despair in interviews that way).
Best to all of you!
Gourgandise beautifully written; thank you!
In terms of mindset: A really good frame that I’ve learned is to see this as fear of the future in general. You can only ever control and experience the present moment, and your mind will TRY to predict the future based on past experiences (this is a survival mechanism for humans). These predictions are, most of the time, inaccurate and based on fear. So what I do is remind myself that the anxious emotions are from an imagined future event which isn’t 100% guaranteed to happen not an actual event right here right now (even if it’s happened before).
The anxiety we experience comes from the anticipation of an event we have labelled as negative. Try to find a way to reframe it as a positive I.e. “when someone comes over to me to check up, they’re helping me to work more efficiently and they know I can perform at a higher rate, so they’re supporting me” - little reframes like this help A LOT
On a more practical note: If you feel like you’re getting too many requests then perhaps flag it up to your manager and proactively show them all the work you’ve been doing so they know you’re working as hard as you are!
Hope this helps :)
"The only thing that creates stress is thoughts about work". Yes, but those thoughts are grounded in at least some reality. Ergo, this particular task is out of my range of ability or this job I should have dealt with a long time ago or I'm so deep into a problem and now can't dig myself out.
well put Daniel.
Just read your post after I posted my situation up above. You are absolutely correct
Practically did Not listen to what you were saying until last 2 mins of video: "you don't know what the outcome would be if things don't work the way you want them to work". This resonates with me.....
I just move my business into Newer & bigger place but things are Not going as smoothly as I wanted. Every new challenge sends me into fear, & I wish I could sell and run away.
Just thought I d share & see if any feedback. Thnkuuuuuuu
There are a few bullies in my work so I get so stressed before a shift
Hannah Banana don't worry I have been bullied befor it's horrible and ur not alone don't worry and keep your head high god things will happen to those are good 😊 and bad things will happen to those who are mean and bad things will get better promise I do to sometimes just say I'm your head I don't give a shit what others think about me xx things will get better xxxxxxx
Sam Seddon thank you for your kind words!!! Xxx
I just walk away from them or act like I do not want to be bothered. I will act like I am working to avoid them.
Hannah Banana i quit my job today i was fired badly.... so sad... alot people bully me and put under pressure
Their just opsticals in life we just have to ignore them and sometimes it builds character to learn how to ignor others
You just revolutionised my world good sir. I have been struggling with so much anxiety around work, so Thank you.
Hey Noah. This was a shockingly good video. I'm starting a new job in two weeks after taking close to a year off to recover from a brain injury. My tolerance for handling stress is much lower now, thanks for these tools!
Nice video Noah. I feel stressed in my new job because I feel like my boss is making fun of me/doesn't think I can handle myself for tasks. I hope I can get through it.
You have a very calming voice! Thank you for the video, you're providing a good perspective.
Stress makes people say strange things.
I work as a nurse for almost 4 years after now, and I still have trouble handling the workload between actual patient care and documentation that is becoming more and more stressful. I have anxiety and have not been able to sleep. I hear what you are saying but having someone's life in my hand adds another layer to this anxiety I have. I want to know if it is still the same kind of stress you are talking about.
I hear all the time nursing is stressful and I'm not even a nurse. Have you considered psychiatric nursing? At least you wouldn't feel like you have someone's life in your hands?
I can understand where you are coming from, which is why i do not take jobs or careers like that. Its stressful and you have to be mentally prepared to deal with it because if not you will only stress yourself out and cause even more anger to yourself.
your stress is different from the one mentioned here in this video. but first of all you hold responsibility for your own well being, right?
stop eating sugar. Acupuncture might help.
The idea that 'u don know wats best for u' resonates with me well.
Thank u noah!
You have constructed my thoughts in details and i hope i could use this knowledge to cope with the current environment that creates stress for me as well as my own consciousness to be better at what i am doing as a junior sales mgr.
Thank you
Thank you, this spoke to me and it was very helpful in coming to a realization of why I was stressed and how success or failure had nothing to say about myself, but that I should "just do my best and see what will happen." I am very thankful, Thank you!
Sometimes when im really stressed at work i like to remember that me and everyone at work are tiny organisms clinging to a spinning rock in space. We are all going to one day cease to exist, from the receptionist up to oh so important CEO... so why take such trivial work issues seriously. Just take a step back and recognise the absurdity of your own worries in the grand context of yours and everyone elses existence. There is really nothing in life to worry about, least of all some bullshit corporate paycheck.
Im working in a kitchen so i want to learn to cook but im afraid anytime im doing something i might be late or moving slow.. while the managers want me to do it fast.. They hold me a speech about that im not good at being an general assistant in this hotel im working, i do mixed jobs.. till they said im not good for anything.. but slowly i got used to it.. but i still have alot to learn and im still stressed that i might do mistakes again. They are so strict but I hope I'll be capable to learn asap! I have almost 4 weeks here! I am thinking positive but sometimes when we have alot of orders it's diffiicult, Im confused with what to start. Im afraid that they'll hold me a speech again. Anyway you're right.. but sometimes i can control my stress but sometimes i might end up crying... and makes me depressed
Carmen BD kitchens are stressful no doubt, but what I've learned is that you gotta take your time and it'll come. You'll pick up tips and tricks that'll make you faster and improve the kitchen. I get speeches too, and I've been doing this for years. It happens when you make mistakes. You're human. It's what you learn from those mistakes that improve you. You can also watch other employees and see what they do. That way you're watching what a skilled employee brings and you can mock their actions till you're doing what they're doing like muscle memory. I hope this helped a little but I feel you and I am stressed as well. Kitchens are high stress
I'm so sorry to hear that. I've been in that situation before, hopefully you're just not there anymore. I hope you find a good place to be.
I'm so sorry to hear that. I've been in that situation before, hopefully you're just not there anymore. I hope you find a good place to be.
@@lizvn6492 hi there
I've been in that place just 6 months. They were treating us like slaves
Now I got a job in accounting. Its def way better than what I did, still stressful but getting there!
Your calm tone of voice makes me wanna cry 😢 (in a positive way)
Thank you. I work as a DSP1 and I deal with clients/residents with BEhaviors/Intellectual disabilities and eating disorders. My problem is not really the residents it's the workers. We have a lot of people who are just nagging all the time and always rude and hateful. The residents sometimes destroy our things like cars, they destroy property on campus and they cause many people to get into trouble. BUT the benefits, pay is better than many jobs locally. Many people drive 2 hours just to work here. BUT I also had to switch shifts because I need to get more education so I can get out of being DSP1 it's such a hard job. They expect us to work 16 -22 hours . We are always short handed people come there train for a month then get paid then quit. Or they all quit at same time. Last week we lost 3 people on our home. One was on vacation and another calls in all the time. Today I worked 11.50 hours and It was my day off. I hope that I can get my degree finished and try my best to leave this place I really can't stand working there. BUT I need the money and I was working indepently for years and I loved that but it was harder to make money in the economy and I was just loosing my motivation and momentum . I like not having to worry about marketing, ads, contracts etc. BUt you're right. thank you again... this is what I needed to hear.
This video was very helpful. I used to make my quotos in the past 7 years but now new mgr is expcting more. For the past 3 months straight, i am told I'm not making my numbers. I've tried different remedies to push myself but cannot make these new unreachable numbers. I say they're unreachable because only 3 of 9 people are reaching those numbers. My direct supervision says im not doing the best that i can. Please note that we've lost 3 coworkers and the remaining 9 are doing additional work than before. Listening to your video, i recognize that i put down myself and think im not good enough and lately been thinking i could lose my job. I do my job well but my supervisor is constantly bringing me down because she has pressure from the new management. I will try to teach my mind not to listen to her discouragement and continue to do my as i half best, but its difficult when its happening everyday. Im having work nightmares and anxiety. One thing is true is when you're constantly doubting yourself, you cannot do the best you can. Ill stop here. I know that was a lot.
you just described my life n you also have just gave me a the tools i need to survive in any job....thanks
Some great ideas & logic. I have put this in my favourites, subscribed & sent to some off my "allied comrades" at work. Keep up the good work & thank you
This is what I needed to here! Stress is the worst enemy at a job and you proved that to me thank you
Thank you for these wonderful videos. You have much wisdom and gentleness and they are terrific.
When he asked if i am stressed every single moment and im sitting here in my second semester of physics in germany. And yes. Absolutely. Every single moment 😂
I think my situation is harder to understand as it is not the Work itself or the boss... but it is the bosses Blatant favoritism and unfairness that is seen by others.
In that case it is the boss
Thank you so much. Now I know how to handle stress, I will try.Very nice👍
I'm certainly at a work crossroads right now and have been in a make or break talk with my boss about my stress. This video has helped me realise I can focus on keeping anxiety at bay. I look forward to watching your others. Thank you
just a thought. I wrote make or break & then realised my boss never said that, I did just then! Thinking of scenarios ahead of events yet to happen. Grrrrr! See how easy it is to keep switching to the same mindset!
You hit the most essential part of the stress. Thank you!
My problem was I’m in a new team at work and working even longer hours I finish at 6 get home around 7 and it just stresses me out I don’t see my old friends from work any more and I have different breaks it’s just upsetting
Thank you for your help. I really need it today. thanx a lot . I am feeling stress free after watching your video. Great work ..
Wow its cool. I was very stressed because of my office work. When I watch this video, I realised who I am and what I should do. Thank you very much. Cheers.
Thank you for thinking refresh and remind. I feel better to accept and endure.
I really needed this thanks mate, Pro tip smile even if things sucks just smile it allways helps me really try it, your in a bad mood high stress push a smile and feel the joy Dopemins hit you ahhh
I should listen to this every day! Fantastic!
What to do when you're stressed every single moment at work? ...
Look for another work you enjoy more.
I'm so sorry this is your experience. Receive my love from Africa
just relax and do your work the way you want it and see what happens..you never know whats good or bad for you..!
i needed this.
I work in a corporate company where the workload is just crazy. So many meetings, emails and data processing, reporting metrics, managing 2 teams in different locations, traveling every day in traffic jams (yes, it’s LA). I literally enter my office and my heart rate is 100, then I open my email (Pandora’s inbox, 100 emails every morning even when I work late the previous day) and I see all the firefighting that I need to do all is rush and prioritized, nothing can wait, phone calls. Back to back meetings with managers, then there’s literally no time to read the emails or implement solutions. Ruminating after work and worrying about projects I was not able to finish that day due to high workload. It’s killing me slowly and managers act like there’s still more eork that needs to be done quickly on top of that. It’s corporate hell job. I’ve been enduring this ordeal for $ but coming to the point of realization life is dripping through my fingers and health is more important. I have to make a change. I try to start my own budiness but have literally zero mental energy to even contemplate it. Thank you for this video!
You’re a blessing in disguise 🙏💕
Stupid People Stress Me Out..and people who tell me how to do my Job..but they have No Idea how to Do it
I thought it would be best for me to be with this great guy, so I started thinking about him for two days straight. Turned out it made me really sad because he wasn't the one who could make me happy (only I could do that). So I searched RUclips for some help because I really felt terrible and now I'm sitting here learning these amazing lessons from you... So you're very right, you don't know if somethings will be good for you. Time will tell. Thanks
i know its been 2 years since you posted that but a while ago i thought i was with the perfect guy, thought we'd marry and have kids. it turned out he was a dick, made me unhappy, put me down, lied to me .... im much better off without him and i cant rely on others to make me happy
thank you for sharing and helping others.
keep up the good work.
I have a lot to think about. Thanks!
Thank you for making this video. Wish I had this perspective years ago.
This is excellent for mental growth. Thank you, I really need to hear this information.
Thank you for creating this video. I now understand how to manage my stress. Finally!
Christy Acero You're welcome Christy!
I learnt part of your advice the hard way. You have just shortened content that takes years to learn in real life. Thank you.
Really great video, just what I need. Made me realise that it really is just thoughts that create stress. Thank you :-)
This is so true in so many ways. I appreciate you and your video a lot!
Man everything you said was exactly what I'm going through right now. Thank you for making this video 😊
Jesus. That was fantastic. I analyzed so much from it. I'll still give 110% in my job, but i'm not gonna do it in terms of stress. Whether i win or fail, i'm trying my best! I noticed my intention was wrong in the first place. Just to be enough in my job was my flaw in reasoning. But if i get good news or bad news, so mnay variables are in place. And how do i know it's best for me? I don't! I try my best. And that's what matters.:)
I get anxiety before I have to go to work because in afraid to deal with my co workers because they treat me like I don't know what I'm doing. My job I have no rest at all and then gives me more anxiety because I want to rest before work and I can't. It's hurt because my co workers only pick on me and it makes me want to quit my job....
A great video I will have to return to in bite sized pieces. Your approach is great. A recurring challenge for my stress is being unprepared for a situation leaving me unable to respond and feeling stress. This happens often when I am positioned within a group or network that is not a good fit. This slowly embodies low esteem and sensitivity to touchy subjects and in rare situations a nasty defence response. I will put time into your videos. Thank you for creating them.
Hi Noah!
I have a question about the second cause of anxiety.
I feel that I need to know why is causes anxiety.
If I think I know what is good or bad for me, why does that cause anxiety?
And I wanted to share my new thoughts for anyone else who may resonate with them.
"Good work doesn't mean I'm valuable, it just means I did my job.
Doing my job doesn't mean I worthy, it just means I did my job.
Not being able to do my job doesn't mean I'm worthless, it just means I struggled to do my job.
Not being able to contribute because I have high anxiety doesn't mean I'm worthless, it just means I struggle to contribute when I have high anxiety.
Bringing down the mood of my workplace because I'm stressed out doesn't mean I'm unworthy, it just means I brought down the mood of my workplace because I'm stressed out."
R to
Any type of work stress people. Makes people get old faster and face look ugly
Cc and caffeine
Yes so true
I just recently got promoted to a new position and i get alot of stress out of it and my Boss. Thank you for making this video it made me feel better. ^_^
Thats why I do not take promotions or jobs where it will be stressful on me. I could care less about the money anymore, my happiness is more important to me than working nonstop and being miserable.
Leyah McMillan Same personally. As I learned being an intern where I had my first job that I personally love and wish to be with them the most, the only thing that made me happy is the task that I can really do that is more straightforward and I can do better for it. While I put money second as I also like those yhings, but personally I don't think those things as I miss those than dealing with internships right now that I just can't do it anymore.
I'm hearing two main takeaways
1) your work doesn't define you so don't take it personal whether you do good or bad
2) you think you know what is best for you in your life but you don't know (let go of control)
i am nurse fresh graduate. im tagging with my seniour. my senior was so scary. she keep push me to work fast but im a learner need time. but she dont bother that. she keep yelling me to faster n i am cant focus. i cant learn. but im just do my best. sometimes i cant cope with my situation
Awesome video! I just started working as a cashier and I often find myself stressing so hard over that job because one moment, I'm doing a good job and I think to myself that I can do this job well and then the next day, when I actually mess up, I get extremely upset and think to myself that I can't do the job at all and I should quit before things get too bad. So, I guess for now on, I should just think about doing the best I can and not worry about whether or not I'm good at this job if I messed up.
Rabbitearsblog really?
Wish you were my coworker
Larry Turner Me too.
his voice is so soothing
Spot on, for me. Way too much thought, way too much "it means something about me, my worth". I know this, intellectually. This is one I need/HAVE to implement. Whew . . .
Hello Noah,
As mentioned below, you have a really calming manner of speaking. Thank you for the video, it is very good
i'm going through such a tough time right now in my career and this helps a lot!
Noah, thank you for this video, it has really inspired me.
Thanks Noah thanks for the video now that you helped me kill off this problem I'm all good now I was the first one on oh my boss hates my work I'm horrible take care Noah and thank s a lot bro stay real :)
it was so helpful. ut i wish to know about a particular situation , how can i get in touch?
It bothers me that where I work, I don’t get a set schedule, I continuously get called in the day before or the day of 😒
Jesus can change yr mind
Have you done a video on wanting people to like you and always wanting approval?
Thank you for your video. You pinpointed at the problem i am facing at the moment. Now i can deal with it a lot better.
You are my God, period.
This video is amazing. Thank you!
(WARNING, LONG VENT, didn't mean to vent here but it just kept typing and there's no turning back now. Context is that I'm 17 working at a super busy fast food place. It's my second/third job. I've experienced similar stress patterns at different jobs before. )
I'm kinda here at this video because i work at a really busy fast food place and I'm starting to realize that my social anxiety will very much get in the way of everything that I do while working there.
However I don't want to let my family down as theyd believe I'm just lazy or not trying hard enough, it's really not helping when they tell me to just " Don't stress" And " You'll be fine, just relax" Cuz I feel like it's not an option. By the time I will relax there is always something else I have to focus on etc.
And I'll be dead honest it's really breaking me down at this point, even right now it's my day off and I'm just constantly thinking about my next shift and about all the mistakes I'm making.
I've been there for only a month but because of the current world situation of 2020 and corona, things are getting 10 times more busier, my manager keeps begging me to speed up immediately and not make mistakes. I've already been warned that I have 1-2 more weeks to improve or otherwise I might have to look for something else.
However I tend to worry about making mistakes all the time or try to pressure myself to improve my speed but Ethier way I'll make a huge mistake that can really cost them and I will take full responsibility for it.
I understand why they are putting pressure on me because of reopening due to corona and stuff.i haven't got much time left to practice before things get absolutely crazy at my job from how busy it will get. But I just don't know anymore.
I just don't know what to do or where else to properly say this stuff because I'm constantly stressed and tense all the time at work. Im unsure if its just because it's fast food and maybe I need to try something else or maybe I'm at fault here, maybe my anxiety is too much?
I'm sorry if I seem like I'm fishing for advice in a random comment section but I just wanted to put this out there, just somewhere I guess. Maybe it can help let go at least 1% of it all. I thank you a lot if someone reads it to this far cuz tbh I do feel better already thank you.
- malakai
The only way to be stress free is to travel all around the world .. Have fun and don't work
Cc no balance is key ba
Lol
I love travailing, but you need money to do it and the only way to get money is to either… win the lottery or work.
Agree, you’re right.
You are very good at this Noah. Glad i ran into your videos. I need this. Thank you.
Thank you Noah
you are one of the best!
Im stressed because my boss/colleges are very disorganised and always create a mess which I have to clear up. And they don't usually tell me how and when I need to clear up their mess when I'm not sure how.
I think in your case instead of having to clean up after other people need to stand up for yourself be like hey I did my part by cleaning I need you to do your part by cleaning I've been in this case before when I worked in up food and beverage department and they would make me clean up after everybody and then one day I was like hey this is not my job to clean up after everybody else my job is clean my area not everybody's so please can you do your part by cleaning yours it's best to just try to stick up for yourself. and if that does not work the manager should know the role of each person and you can bring it to the manager and they will straighten out the person.
i allways stress ! thanks
Thanks man!
This is really appropriate for my situation thanks Noah
Great lesson, believe in jah he's the provider of all things
You are AMAZING. Thank you so much for helping us all out.
Hey Noah, I have a complex question regarding a certain person I work with. I work with someone who has to do their job in order for me to do my job, like a "hand off" situation, however I'm constantly going back to them and asking them to correct their work so I can properly move forward with my work. Neither my boss OR their boss is taking any corrective action, pretty much ignoring it. At this point, I just want to not let it bother me, but the aggravation jams up my work load and sometimes keeps me up at night, given I'm the only one impacted by it and I'm astonished by how unfair the situation is being treated, or untreated since no one seems to care accept me. Maybe you can show me how to not let this person bother, as your other videos pretty much saved my life. Thanks!
This is brilliant advice. Thank you Noah.
Thank you so much Noah.I really found it helpful
Thank you, this video was exactly what I needed.
Thank you! Brilliant!
one of the best video that help me deal with my business problem. ty noah , i never realize that i was always trying to prove myself as a good successful businessman :D
***** You're welcome Goddy, glad it helped
Your voice is very calming. Thank you
Very helpful!
Excellent!! And so well said...Thank you for helping me look at things differently and questioning assumptions I can make. I look forward to watching your other videos :)
You're welcome mike! Glad that it helped you!