HOW THEY TURN IT ON AND OFF SO EASILY
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- Опубликовано: 6 фев 2025
- #narcdaily
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• THE BEGINNING..VIDEOS ...
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• The Narcissist TOP 10 ...
• The Aging Narcissist
• Divorce the Narcissist
I am convinced in order for them to be like this, they most certainly had to have at least one if not two toxic parents.
100%
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His parents spoiled him rotten!
Not necessarily
They made a decision to play a game with other peoples lives at some point in their life but a lot of them did have narcissistic parents. There are cases where people fall to the dark side as well.
It’s all about control. They wish wash back and forth, push and pull. Mentally they’re mad at you. Really it’s all about taking all your energy.
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The narcissist can turn it off and on so easily, and now with your awareness so can you. Going no contact lets you hit the off button on the narcissist. Turning them off lets you turn back on.
Wishing everyone clarity and peace..
Great video Andrew!!
Thank you 😌💯🙏
I love that thinking!! I am in the same space!!!
You are not feeling tired,
frustrated, sad or anxious
for no reason!
Thank you Andrew for your enlightenment and for encouraging us again and again to continue on the healing path.❤🙏
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You are 100% spot on with the “pro tip” he NEVER apologized as he NEVER believed he was ever wrong, as if he was God himself! So to make my life more bearable and to keep the peace, I would be the one trying to reconcile and apologize for something I didn’t even do or when I was even in the wrong! It was so crazy, I can’t believe that was ever my life!
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No, they don’t apologize. I’ve mentioned before it’s gut wrenching when you have to ask them to apologize to you for what they did. It’s completely backwards! It’s because they don’t care.
Nope! It's always your fault no matter what. It was my fault she lied to me for 8 years.
When I think back....My heart aches for everyone that has experienced the narcissistic relationship. Wishing everyone joy, peace, strength and healing. Keep moving forward and do not look back. Blessings. NAMASTE♥
Namaste 😌🙏🙌
It's fascinating to observe how narcissists possess an uncanny ability to switch their behavior on and off so effortlessly. This adaptability is a testament to their deep understanding of human psychology and their manipulative tendencies. By effortlessly toggling between charming and self-centered behaviors, they are able to maintain control and influence over others. It serves as a reminder to stay vigilant and discerning, ensuring we protect ourselves from their manipulation while fostering healthier connections.
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Totally agree, always stay vigilant 😊
Yes very true,.they know what works and the become experts @ it
@james. Exactly
A bank teller shorted me $5.00 and was proud of it. The cameras are in case they give us too much money. They are preying on innocent people enjoying upsetting them.
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jeanetteone, Wow! Just when ya think you heard everything! 🙏
Every time I would try to talk things through, it was as if I was talking to a brick wall. Then, I became a shell of myself, and would stick up for myself less and less, because I felt as though “I’m damned if I do, and damned if I don’t” it was so messed up the entire situation!
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He would try to humiliate me or start an argument saying derogatory or untrue things. I would make a short, concise statement of truth. He would contradict and try to gasslight. I would just turn away and not respond.
I said the truth. No further truth to say. No argument....
He'd stick his nose in the air and shuffle off to the bedroom - He never "walked". Shuffling was fashionable in his youth, so he is stuck in that fashion! Sometimes he would throw a tantrum or rage fit. I'd just go about my business thinking he would put a two year old to shame, without responding.
I want to start by thanking you from the bottom of my heart for what you do for all of us who need advice and a push in the right direction. I listen to you every morning in the car on the way to work, I feel terribly bad every morning as soon as I open my eyes, because every day is a bad day. Starting my morning with you gives me so much energy, you give me hope and I know that one day I will be fine, thanks to your help and encouragement. I hope you deeply understand what a support you are to those of us out there who need to hear everything you say. A stranger with a heart in the right place who has saved my life. I thank you for being there and what you do for us is beautiful. God bless you ❤
Welcome 😌🙏❤️😇
I align with pslime3830 comment word for word and may I add, commercial free. Andrew’s pure soul felt communications are from the heart for the greater good of mankind that have been preyed upon by these damaged individuals.
Today I woke up the same way pslime3830 did feeling one of lowest of lows. After celebrating 3 weeks of no contact and making great recovery strides, the narc found a photo thread I’d missed covering on my phone. He sent me a love bomb hoover wanting to patch things up. He had come into the area which I live to dismantle and sell “our dream house for when he retired” which is 500 some miles from his home. This home is overflowing with beautiful things he’d purchased as deals on his spare time fulfilling his thrift shopping addiction. I had moved into a small apartment during a no contact period only to be hoovered back on and off over a 12 + year period. So I’d move back and forth. He would talk about getting married… I told him the apartment would go away and we could get married if he changed something’s I couldn’t live with. He even gave me access to his FB account. I watched his trolling shinanigns, dalliances with other women which he would bambastically deny. He would give various people we would come upon different answers to who I was to him throughout this time… a friend, significant other, fiancé, property manager, recently when he was on the phone in his car a neighbor of his stopped to say hello to him the narc told him he was on the phone with (the steering I live in) he and his neighbor laughed about that, he had a hard time saying I was his girlfriend because we were too old for that term and it didn’t fit. Previous to all of that he helped me through a difficult situation and flew out to take me to the hospital for a major surgery. Anyway the reality of it was the house was basically a timeshare with benefits, a real estate investment because I needed a place to live and I was in a one sided “situationship” = an undefined relationship therefore no one could be cheating. He is the most incredible creative liar I have ever seen. The last couple times he was here, he was here physically but not present mentally. We’d be out to dinner, he’d be listening to conversations of others around us, on his phone and somehow couldn’t hear what I was saying. Yet I had a very deep love for him. I’ve been educated to learn that truma bonds create an internal chemical reaction in your body that makes you addicted to the narc and creates a deep love and yearning for them known as a trauma bond. Wanted to pass that information on to others. So the narc has sent me some love bombs hoovers. When saw I was not responding he sent me some pictures from an African mask display with the description how they were devil masks and included my picture. I promptly blocked the thread saying to myself nothing you have to say is of any interest to me. So I am now regreiving someone I deeply loved, the false dreams and relationship. I found out last night my older sister who lives out of town has cancer that requires chemotherapy and I am her anchor. God and Jesus get me through this, along with Andrew’s videos and this community. Bless each one of you. No one deserves any of this treatment which appears to be in epidemic proportions. You are not alone and we will overcome this together in love and support. Thank you Andrew and community. ❤️✝️🙏🏻💞☀️🌷
…. I thought I’d have to involve the police but haven’t had to so far.
I believe his hoover was basically he wants nothing more than for me to either stay in the house so he doesn’t have to dismantle until he fully retires, do the cleaning and the grunt work.
He is fully into his local supply, although he’d deny that. This is a love bomb/hoover/ control thing with him.
I have FINALLY reached 100% INDIFFERENCE and I couldn’t have accomplished this without Andrew (and many others). I’d like everyone early on in this education to know it WILL come… just keep listening even when you didn’t feel like it anymore.
When you’re indifferent … and sit back and watch their behavior, it’s powerful once you get past “feeling bad” for not caring anymore.
Beautiful empowering message 😇🙌❤️🙏😊
My ex used his childhood trauma to justify many of his abhorrent behaviors. I felt sorry for him even though my childhood trauma far outweighed his. Not comparing, but I never used my trauma to excuse my behaviors. Do not fall for this tactic because they cannot change, heal and become a better human being. They are broken an cannot be fixed!! My empathy kept me in bondage for 40 years. I wish I listened to people I trusted 😢
Thank you Andrew ❤
Welcome 🙏💯😌
Wow. Yes the narcissist always has to show up late especially if it's to an event that's important to you. They slow down intentionally to make you late. They love making you feel anxious and they LOVE LOVE LOVE ruining anything you are looking forward to attending.
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@justwondering, that's absolutely true facts 💯
Everyone will be hanging out and talking and being silly and then YOU say or do something and they judge you. It is like they pick you out to be at the bottom. If you bring it up then you are the problem. It's all inside your head, remember!
That is my family, exactly. !
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@@shahadah1451 Same here, also my friend groups too.
🎉 i should have listen to my gut feeling when i felt him being sleazy. id brush it off thinking i was being paranoid or jealous( which he would say i was) Im promising myself im never going thru that again🤔🎉
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Dark shadow possession is a part of it.
And I have to comment a SECOND time. These toxic things really believe THEY are the most SPECIAL ones and cannot wait in line. Oh the stories we could tell. So many highlights today Andrew. FANTASTIC ❤🙌❤️
Thank you for sharing ☺️😇💯
💯 They feel intitled to have what you have , the more you give the longer the narcissist will stay , if you don't leave they will just keep you in their circle of abuse.....
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Thank you Andrew for this message today… yes he ignored me but he didn’t have a cell phone then…. It was politics on tv all day and half the night…. And that was so much more Important than having a conversation with me!!! Always!!!! But imagine that!!! After I left him, he got a cellphone and is now on Facebook!!!! With female friends he went to high school with!!! And a few others! I’m a quilter and he had an affair with the owner of the only quilt shop in town…. !!!!! So that stopped me from going to the shop!!!! I’m So glad to be free from all of that abuse!!! Thank you Andrew and all of you on this channel ❤️🙏💕🙌Love to you all
Welcome 🙏💯😌🙌
I have a theory that narcs can't get away from TV and Facebook, because it allows them to escape facing themselves. These are two great distractions! If they spent time in therapy, it would help. Sadly, they think everyone needs therapy except for them.
Because everything was so subtle over the years...after my narc sister plunged in the knife(and twisted it) I realized that all the ignoring and deflection was done for an accumulative effect on me; My vulnerable moment was when I was blindsided (by her). The victory for me is knowing what this is about and not holding onto bitterness.
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The Cushing highs and lows.
We are not crazy, unless you lived it, you cannot understand it.
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These people are absolutely disgusting like you said Andrew! “Like who does that,or who says that”? Typical words we empaths think and feel with these evil doers! You are so right on Andrew! Keep these educational videos coming Andrew! You are very appreciated!
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@Karen. Exactly
The fact that he could so easily turn the charm off and inflict emotional pain without flinching is why I view the action of narcs a spiritual issue vs. "psychological" issue - driven by voluntary evil intent. I still get triggered when particular memories invade my conscience...words and actions used against me purely for the purpose of inflicting pain. Yes, the "on-off" spin cycle got worse incrementally. I'm grateful every day that I escaped and am well on my way to complete healing. Thank you for sharing your wisdom, Andrew. ☺
Welcome 😌🙏💯
I can relate to so many of your examples. It’s almost as if you could see inside my soul. I wish I found you 40 years ago! I didn’t know narcissists existed.
pattimcd3177, I thought a narcissist was a conceited person.🫠🌸
As did I. So naive.
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Andrew thank you I have no words to describe my appreciation....listening to your life coaching....put me right back on my feet, made it so much bearable to get over it and move on and become the BEST VERSION OF ME. God bless you in abundance 😊
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While driving to a hospital appointment for our daughter, the narcissist showered me with just another one of his rage fits and endless put downs. As expected I was in a foul mood when we arrived for the appointment. As soon as we walked into the waiting room which was full of strangers, the narcissists switched masks putting on fake smiles and calm demeanour.
Just to add insult to injury, a total stranger in the waiting room, (probably another narcissist), made an uncalled for, remark to me saying what a nice guy the narc husband was and what a sour person I was…..
All I’ve learnt from this is NEVER judge anyone when you don’t know them or what they are going through. Never judge a book by its cover. In many situations, things are not as they appear to others.
Thank you for sharing this 💯🙏😌
@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone
You are most welcome Andrew🙏💖🌹
They are two people living inside of one body. They are SO GOOD at putting on a show. Behind closed doors no one expects what really happens. The rage fits and berating can turn into other forms of abuse rather quickly too. They don’t know when to stop, it’s as if they can’t stop and it becomes a pattern. I started penciling incidents in on my calendar because I wanted to keep track of how frequently it was happening. …even on holidays. I’m so sorry you had to go through this too 😞 you are not alone.
@@danielle1103
Danielle, you are right, they are like a split person and you never know which one will make their appearance at any given moment. They are excellent actors as well and know how to behave in public so that no one suspects anything, and they can portray a perfect image of themselves to the outside world. And they definitely know how to spoil significant times of the year for especially holidays.
God bless you sweetheart, and thank you for your words of encourage, no we are not alone 🙏💖🌷🌸🌺🌿
I worked out that the narcissist had some terrible traits but I thought that I could actually help the person within. I was wrong. I thought that if I showed more love, they would come around...nope.
You see, I hadn't yet discovered your channel Andrew and the all important information that I was lacking was that he is a narcissist and wasn't going to change.
Thank God for your channel Andrew... I've been no contact with him or any flying monkeys and have been working hard on myself...after over a year of concious efforts I am so grateful for life these days. Much gratitude to you Andrew and the community you've created. You've been of enormous importance, assistance and support.
Life really is beautiful outside of the narcissistic abusive cycle.
Much love and gratitude to all here. You are all so worthy of blessings in abundance.
Namaste Kind people ❤🙏🏻💕🕊🌠🌺
I felt sorry for the hurt little boy inside that man. I thought we were soul mates and I could ‘fix’ him. He destroyed me. No concern at all about my emotional well being. I’m glad life is beautiful for you now. It is for me too. 🌞
@@freebird968-wg4ye oh thank you and may life continue to be beautiful for you for all the many years to come. Blessings to you in abundance ❤🙏🏻💕🕊🌠🌺
The narcissist used to go early to every event and be the last to leave. He lived for the supply that he got when he was out. To address his anxiety of meeting people, he'd drink. It was ugly. No matter if there was a crisis at home, as occassionally there is, he would leave me to deal with it on my own, and go out.
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They are such sad individuals. Love to be seen. Such low vibrating fruit!
@@tdayy31 So obvious now when you say it so simply (and after all that I have been through). Be well.
WOW, I experienced this 100% when I was married to a Narcissist! Thank God I got away from them! 3 years Narc free now!
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Hi Andrew and everyone. They KNOW what they're doing! They know when and how to turn it on! I've seen in for years, and i believed it at the time. It's EASY for a liar to lay it on thick. Very impressive then, but DISGUSTING now. Don't be fooled. They never loved us. GREAT TOPIC ANDREW..❤❤
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They never loved and they canNOT love. But we can. God bless you. You sound stronger and stronger alll the time. 🙏❤️
Andrew, I believe I have always been in narcissist relationships. I am a Christian and have always trusted God to protect me even when I was ignorant to the devils devises.
All three of these narcissists died, but I came out of the fire as gold. Many say I was too gullible because I had simple faith but God was faithful to deliver me.
Now that I really see what kind of men they really were and getting educated, I so appreciate it.
For all those out there who are trusting God as they come out of these situations, continue to be educated and I can tell you God is very faithful and HE will bring you out more prosperous and knowing Jesus faithfulness and love more then ever.
Keep doing the work and never give up.
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When you’re educated you see all these behaviours so much clearer . They have to be the centre of attention it’s like look at me the ones that put on the charm(the player who’s married)I’ve encountered a couple of these in my head I’m saying to myself not a chance mate see ya later. They love the grand entrance saw this so many times with the ex 🙏💕
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So true.. i’ve been out of the relationship for five months and things do get better !! one important thing I learned living with a narcissist is that I over shared too much information…I want you all to know to not give them your information. you may just want to keep it between you and God….
Another great video, Andrew!!🙏thank you so much for all you do💕
Welcome 😌💯🙏
@janet4513
Thanks for bringing this up. I have been to open & it's not wise.
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I utilized small talk in situations to make people relax ... it worked, until I didn't see the Narc
world under the shrubs taking notes and having freely given info weaponized ( in distorted ways) against me. Major adjustment these last several months on rolling back info. share. Still not worth giving any kind of info to a Narc. It'll come out distorted and twisted, anyway.
He was an absolute gentleman at the start. So kind, generous, gentle. Attentive. Wanted to know everything about me.. And then yes he did get in my mind .
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Oh yes!! ❤
They are shallow that's how they can do that easily, but what cost them is they ends up confused themselves big time. Trade in real treasure for the shit, is all they do in life. lol.
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When I watch these videos, in the midst of the painful reminisce, I beam with glee because someone else understands and confirms with me. I feel a major relief...I GOT IT RIGHT! I had it right all that time 😭and because they think they've won, I will show them that we have only just began.
For years I had a motivational IG and FB; I never added the Narc sister to either page. The Narc sister started gearing her personal IG & FB towards food and motivational posts. Ignoring her own children just to create content that she didn't believe in. The Narc sister once spewed at my connection with God and my level of happiness stating "Nobody could be that happy!" "I don't remember our grandmother ever talking to you about God". We went to Sunday school EVERY Sunday. When I moved to the USA, the Narc mother refused to take me to church consistently. Eventually her and the Narc sister told me since I wanted to go so badly, then I should go alone. I stopped going to church alone at 13 but NEVER forgot the daily words my Granny taught me "No matter who turns their back on you in this world, know that you are a child of God and HE will always provide for you. HE will always be there for you... even if I am not around"
When the Narc sister couldn't keep up with my online productivity or get enough followers she would say "She (she as in me) has all the time on her hands, she no children, I'm getting my double masters, blah blah blah". None of those things were of interest when I stopped speaking to them (a flying monkey that I've since eliminated told me).
We were their motivation, their lives are based on us. There are so many of these terrible people roaming this universe. As soon as I smell the N in Narc I suddenly become way too busy to communicate. "Gotta go, take care!"
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Thank you for sharing this 😌💯🙏
camoore12, after 5 years with him, you believe him, UNTIL YOU REALIZE YOU'RE BEING USED.
Sounds like you got it right and you have the intuition to guide you!
@@jannlewandowski5540 We are brought here to be USED, being MISUSED was not apart of the plan but still I STAND.
Careful! Some things you mentioned can also be ADHD. I picked up on the "fashionably late" scenario. My narc insisted I look perfect, and be more beautiful, better dressed than other women at events. Our circle was the elite of the elite. A very tall order.
I did spend hours at the mirror before the event, FOR him.
I was juggling poor time-management skills, survivalist terror, need for approval, fear of abandonment, and hypervigilance.
What was CPTSD, and ADHD looked, from the outside, like Borderline traits.
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The dark night of the soul, I was lost and in great pain, sad and alone. Questioned my own existence! I saw a dim light in the darkness, felt my hand being held and led toward a greater light. When I finally was in the light, I saw who was holding my hand and guiding me through the darkness! It was me as a a child!! He said I was lost and he found me. Now, in the light I have found that I’m my best friend! Finally, a peace that I can understand! Thank you Andrew for your powerful words! They are so needed in this world!
Welcome 😌💯🙏🙌
@@bonniedunbar6717My heart goes out to you. No child should suffer from this type of abuse. My mother never told me that she loved me until I was an adult. As a child I told her “I love you mom”, her reply is that I was her responsibility. My sister, brother and I found love and support from a local church. They were my family. I still love my mom and dad, they did the best they could. They are both gone now and my love remains. I’m 62 now and retired. I’m thankful for remembering that little boy and glad I’m with him still. God bless you.
I also remember he would always make me late to every social situation or event that was important to me!
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Spot on Andrew. The BBQ thing sooooo true. And if perchance the BBQ actually started on time the narcissist will readily and loudly blame the empath for the tardiness. The last boyfriend I had would occupy the bathroom for as long as it took to either be so late we couldn't go knowing we needed enough time (and hot water) for me to shower or make comments about me just washing up because I really wanted to go. I started just turning the tables on that one but walked away into homelessness (on and off for the next ten years) rather than even live in the same city as him. It was worth it. Even though I ended up in a terrible roommate situation who was also a narcissist THAT was when I took to google to find solutions. I find it funny today that I began my searches looking for ways to booby trap access to my belongings along with very humourous ways to get minor revenge. I couldn't get enough of videos about narcissism. Healing I am and life is so much sweeter saying no, ignoring and walking away from toxic people. My life is my own and no matter how hard I have to scrape to get by well, I'm authentically me and loving my life in a tiny apartment....of which every little inch is mine and mine alone.
Thank you for sharing this 😌💯🙏
Imagine going through life being nothing but an abuser.
Narcs thrive on abusing the people who are “closest” to them-spouses, partners, their own children. I’m so glad this miserable, abusive behavior is finally being called out. Society has let these people thrive in the darkness-behind the closed doors of their own homes-for too long.
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Andrew, I never knew what a narcissist was until I happened upon one of your videos. I just thought that my X was nuts! This goes so much deeper! I experienced every point in this video. To me,one of the most vile things that the Narc does is the smear campaign. Andrew, thank you for your insight and for starting this community. This is a place where we can all share and grow. You truly are a blessing.
Welcome 😇🙏💯
@janetdavis I know that it takes immense strength. When I asked my X to leave, I was already gutted of feelings! Please stay strong and take care of you. My X already had an apartment lined up. These Narcs's are very self-absorbed
Thanks for explaining that sometimes he is late to make a grand appearance. I always thought that he got enjoyment out of making me wait to dominate me.
Welcome 💯💯😉
Early in the relationship I was being juggled with two other female "friends". We would be having a slow day just home watching TV and as soon as one of these "friends" texted him he lit up like a Christmas tree and gloated like an idiot! One female friend in particular texted early in the mornings sending my ex pictures of herself on a road trip. The texts back and forth between them were incredibly friendly and lengthy. We never texted like that! Our texts were during hateful fights and he would always tell me he hated texting but would never pick up the phone! I was feeling really uncomfortable about these cozy friendships and his reply was I was jealous because I didn't have any friends. He had already slept with one of the females before knowing me. Then slept with her again while we were on a break. Because I called him out on his females, he called me out on the people I've been following on RUclips for years before meeting him. Anything I called him out on he flipped it back to me not trying to compromise or resolve the issue. I dropped him, we're done!
Thank you for sharing 😌🙏💪💯
Great video, thank you Andrew 🙏 And the being late for the plane, is the same as the BBQ. My ex lived his life leaving things till the last possible moment and expecting people to help him deal with whatever arose because of that
Thank you 💯💯🙌😌
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Louise, my ex left things til the last possible moment and then expected me and everyone in the house to rush in and help him accomplish a task that he could have accomplished if he had only set aside enough time for himself to do it. Everything for the narcissist was always frantic and last minute or late no matter if it was a doctor's appointment or going to a friend's house or a friend's birthday party at a restaurant. 💕 🙏 🌷
_Louise__
Arriving fashionably late… was my narc mother’s mantra. She was a beautiful woman always wanting to make an entrance. What the rest of the family felt was entering embarrassingly late. We’d beg her not to do that to no avail. The narc’s theme song is Big Bird from Sesame Street Me, me, it’s ALL ABOUT ME…
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Just so that you know Dear Andrew all these red hearts are meant for you Dear Lola Nelson and the whole comminity here
Lots of love everyone and good day
Tamar❤
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This is so spot on for my STBX covert narc. They are actors worthy the Academy Award. They switch between the charming, loving, angel-like person, and the mean, belittling, condescending narcissist that only you get to see, and back, in 1/10th of a second.
I actually use the "knock on the door" story, when I try to explain covert narcissism to people I trust. This exact thing happened to me several times.
@@mats6504 what’s the knock on the door story? 🌞
@@freebird968-wg4ye as Andrew explains in the video, your narc can be in the middle of a rage fit, or a condescending, belittling rant, and a friend or her mother knocks on the door, they open and as with the flick of a switch, in 1/10 of a second, they are back to the happy, loving, sweet person that they want to be seen as, by the outside world. This happened to me many times.
Great video Andrew. My ex narcissist was a master at turning on the charm , he was very good at it. He would be so horrible to me up until i was done, then i would say im done. The sweetest man would appear and ask me to forgive him and that he would change etc. I would forgive him and it wouldn't last and the monster would come back. Over and over he would do this until the discard. I was completely in shock hurt devastated. But i know that it was a blessing a gift . I walked away and never looked back. Im doing much better now without him. Thank you Andrew for the video and thank you everyone for your kind words.
Welcome 😌🙏💯☺️
Thank you, Andrew. Very helpful. I'm always learning something new with each of your videos.
Nameste to you as well.
crystalporter, he is the BEST..👍🌺
Namaste 😌🙏🙌
Great example with the silent treatment scenario!! With the rage fits though, I recall a very specific time prior to one being induced pizza had been ordered. Well, the rage fit ensued.. the pizza delivery guy called to notify us the pizza was at our home. It was as if nothing had happened. A flip was switched, everything seemed fine with the interaction between the delivery guy, but then once the pizza was inside the rage began again. When you’re subjected to being yelled and screamed at relentlessly you lose your appetite so it didn’t even matter that the pizza had been delivered 😔 I’m not looking for sympathy, but the toll placed on your mental health is excruciating. No one should ever endure the silent treatment or be subjected to having someone yell and scream at them over a prolonged period of time.
What I don’t understand about these people is why would you even consider finding a replacement when you’ve got a really great, caring, and loving individual standing right in front of you! I’m not putting anyone on a pedestal when it’s the truth and it sure isn’t perfection, but it’s true, real, and genuine. They don’t see it though. They don’t see us. We’re taken for granted. Now, I wholeheartedly understand yes, it takes two in a relationship. As I’ve stated before, there are things that could’ve been done differently, or said differently, and it’s a learning process. No one is perfect and it’s never just one person’s fault as to why the relationship didn’t work out. You must take accountability for yourself too. However, when you’ve already got a really good thing going, why ruin it?! It’s not fair for one individual to try and pick up the broken pieces. It’s frustrating, but now I understand it’s for the best. I apologize for going off on a tangent. People can only take so much of what’s being dealt to them before enough, is enough, is enough.
It is unacceptable for someone to yell at another person for long periods of time. It's abusive. Even short periods of time are unacceptable. Like you, I experienced it too. I was yelled at for hours on end. The narcissists don't see people like you and me as people. They see us as things to be used for their advancement and pleasure. They see us as batteries that they can draw energy from. It doesn't matter if we love them or despise them. Energy is energy. All they want is energy. Don't give them anything. Starve them of any energy. They never comprehended that they had a good thing in you or me because they never saw us as people. The way they devalue you is a reflection of how they feel inside. They hate themselves inside. It isn't you. It's them. It seems that they discard us, but really they discard themselves. They discarded themselves early in life and created a facade to present to the world. They don't love themselves, so how could they possibly love you. My heart goes out to you for the abuse you experienced. Never again. We must reflect on our lives and the childhood wounds that left us vulnerable. Sadly, many of the wounds were inflicted by the people we thought were supposed to love us and have our best interests in mind. It is hard to accept the betrayals and abuses of childhood, but if we don't, healing will be incomplete. At this point, all we want is truth. Even if the truth is a hard pill to swallow, at least it is the truth. Bless you. - Joe
@@artluvr6170 Hi Joe!! 🌛✨ Good evening! My goal was to watch the video and then get to bed, but.. I’m still awake. Thank you for replying and thank you for the reminder it’s unacceptable for anyone to yell at anyone, no matter the length. Yelling, screaming, and berating affects you to your core. I’m very serious and honest when I say I’m so sorry you went through this too. You didn’t deserve it, no one does. You’re right, they don’t see us as people and they never will see us as people. We are made to feel less than, our lives have little to no value to them. Clearly we don’t especially when they choose to become physical with us! That is the key indicator right then and there to exit, jump ship. It’s not that easy though 😞 if it were that simple just think of all of the individuals who would be getting out of relationships right now.
As Andrew says, you come first. Your happiness, your health, your wellbeing, and so on and so forth must come first. It makes me feel so sad for the narcissist that they feel this way about themselves. The potential is bubbling right up at the surface and it’s as if you will them to want to change. You offer suggestions but they refuse and I guess you have your answer. I’m sincerely not trying to copy what you’re saying, but from my heart to yours you never deserved the abuse either. Childhood trauma will creep up on us, I’m learning more about it 😉 The trauma isn’t healed and it will continue to haunt you until it is healed. Truth is good, truth is life altering. You are not alone. Have a very good night. 💫✨
@@danielle1103 Thank you, dear, for your tender response. My head is hitting the pillow. Have good a sleep! We can discuss more tomorrow. 🌘🌒🌓🌔🌙
@@artluvr6170 You’re welcome and sounds good. Goodnight 😴🌟💫
@@artluvr6170 that’s so well explained. Thank you.
Quite exhausting isn’t it to be drained of energy and to WADE through their negative vibes that grow worse over time. NO THANK YOU 👎- I used to wonder about that sudden change the toxic individuals had mastered (to switch on or off like things were just fantastic) and I wouldn’t do it. I HAD to pretend as a kid, but as an adult as these situations arose, I was like “hey, I don’t just downshift that fast and I don’t understand how YOU can?!” That was also a big no-no in communication with a narc (didn’t know what I know now). Thanks Andrew so much for all the wisdom and superb education. It’s effectively in process in my life. I’m deeply grateful ❤🙏🦋
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@@bonniedunbar6717 Bonnie it’s amazing what you’ve summarized in a shortened message. Truly amazing what you’ve been through too. Huge 🤗 and respect to you 💖🙏
Oh my goodness I fell for the narcissist hook, line and sinker. I was just a shell of a person to them. With your wisdom and encouragement I am healing more and more everyday. Namaste 🙏. Thank you Andrew. Hugs to you and the committee. 😊😊
Namaste 😌🙏🙌
When I think of my qualities and accomplishments as a resume to attract a narcissist, I see how it magnetized the narcissist.
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You're right on all counts.You're living in darkness with no healthy communication, here comes person x and they turn their light on. Meeting the Narc, it went from the most intimate of conversations to ...? The Narc would send the kids to give a verbal message. They didn't even want to use their own energy to squinch their face while dispensing their BS or to face a rebuttal. I look back and my head was sticking out of quicksand. Have a Kick butt, great Mon. all!🙌 🌞
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My never married 52 year old younger brother is going through this. I have been doing the research on Narcissism recently as I never realized such a horrible, toxic abuse. She discarded him and moved 3 hours away and is now hoovering him, she spent this weekend with him. Thank you for your videos! I'm trying to find one that covers it all, they're all great.
Welcome 😌🙏💯
I think this is an awesome one to show him. Thank you. "Why you were the last to know" is great too!
Thank you! 🙏😁
''Your belief system will blow up''. There we have it !! Peace Andrew / all !
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@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAloneBelivef's, what were they again? My God. Narcs do the worst to themselves , and to others .
These videos are so incredibly healing. I am so grateful l for this community, as well as to God for leading me to all of you to educate and help all of us heal from this. Before, I truly did not know what covert narcissism was. Im trying so hard not to blame myself for being so blind. I finally had to search for answers after being discarded. Im currently looking for a therapist. In the mean time, watching these videos on a daily basis, is helping me not to put the blame on myself, but putting the blame back on the narc who manipulated all of us from the very beginning. God bless all of you!!!
I recall the ex saying that I was hard to read and it made no sense to me but now I get it and I’m glad it was a challenge or they may have taken more
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I really am trying to heal and move on and i left the home but iam very much heartbroken and depressed. Trying my best day by day. I wanted my ex narc to change i held on for years and i feel like my whole last 7 years of my life was a lie. Its the worst pain. I hope to be back to myself how i was before i emt this person i feel tainted. I was fun loving and filled with joy and now iam just walking around sad everyday. I do however know this was the best decision to leave its just killing me. I feel so defeated i really had high hopes we were engaged guess its best we didnt marry. If i had stayed the abuse would only get worse. Im afraid to even meet someone because i dont trust easily now.
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The hawk is a symbol of strength and protection, May he always come back 😊
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You mentioned "robotic like", "there's no human element to it", "there's no real raw emotions with the narcissist". The narcissist made a choice at some point. They chose evil. This is why they all follow the same handbook. The handbook comes from their association with evil. Perhaps hard to acknowledge. But true. God bless
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That’s 👍🏾 Andrew! 💯 I’m still amazed at how fast they do this… it’s like a bipolar disorder without treatment. - And I don’t believe they’re looking for the perfect person or relationship… you are , were the perfect person and relationship so they wanted to destroy you, it. Why? Because that’s what the devil does, takes what is pure and makes it impure, corrupts it because he can’t be it and he’ll never be praised as the creator of it.
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Narcissists.
Kind and loving at the start,
Loving you with all thier heart,
Texts and calls every day.
So into you, is the way.
They like what you like, you seem the same,
Mirroring you, it's just thier game.
They seem perfect just for you,
The true self is hidden from view,
So into you, they want to know all,
To use against you, in your downfall,
You trust and believe all they say,
It's a great performance ,this act this play,
A facade, an imposter, nothing is real,
Saying what you want to hear, is the deal,
Not love in mind , love has no meaning,
Just a cunning mind used for scheming,
In all they say , the performance ,the infusion,
Nothing is real they build an illusion,
An identity made up from traits of many,
Empathy and compassion, they dont have any.
A manipulator, a distorted reality,
Gaslighting is the actuality.
Cycles of drama is all you'll go through,
A wolf in sheeps clothing know this to be true.
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Beautiful poem Leona, love it 💖❤️💖❤️💖
Great poem. All so true. 👏👏
❤ Absolutely priceless message in every way.
Thank you andrew for a empowering video 🙏🦊🔥🕷️🌺🌿🍀🦋🏵️🌼
Welcome 😌🙏💯
I hated the silence treatment couldn’t understand it he used to leave and then not answer his phone and stay out all night then claim he slept in his car . Thanks for another great video Andrew God Bless
NancyKelly, I hear ya! At least we got away from them..👍🫠
@@jannlewandowski5540 absolutely 💯 I’m 7 years single and don’t intend on letting anyone else ever treat me like that again . Iv done a lot of healing research and I do a lot of prayers and meditation 🧘♀️ my life is night and day now . God bless
Welcome 😌🙏💯
😢 yeah exactly been with one for over 30 years😮
The stringing me along because they have fun with it made so much sense I went through that. Very accurate and relatable video thank you!
Welcome 🙏💯😌
5 months out of toxic relationship. I watch all your videos Andrew, you are a true inspiration, this has helped me so much... I am getting stronger each day, I know there is so much work to be done. I am climbing that mountain. ❤
I literally crack up watching your videos now.. these people are so dillusional it’s funny to me now.. comedy..sick individuals😂 Love you Andrew and your knowledge Thank you sir❤
Welcome 😌😇😉
My sister has always arrived late. She arrived late for my Grandmother's 100th birthday. Never understood why she arrived late to everything. Yes, she did dress for a dramatic entrance. Got it.
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On their death bed, no apology. (true)
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👍👍👍🙏🙏🙏❤❤❤ Thanks very much for your time, energy and wisdom. It helped me to realise what relationship I was. I was awoken, stronger and move on. Stay blessed and have a great day .
Welcome 💯🙏😌
They dont apologize !
NEVER........
I remember times before knowing what a narcissist was
i mean i knew the definition never really experienced one in action
I remember thinking 🤔
what is this ?
What did i just see / hear
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Your almost just froze in your tracks
Appreciate the video Andrew
Welcome 😌🙏💯🙌
You end up having to ask them to please apologize to you for what they did and how they made you feel 😔 At the time you do it because you don’t want to lose them or maybe you feel like you don’t have any other choice. This isn’t normal though.
Every time I watch and listen to these enlightening and educational videos, the more I visualise past experiences I went through with the narc, and the more I learn and get tools to stand firm on my resolve to keep no contact and focus on my healing! Thanks Andrew for your tireless efforts to wake the once sleeping empaths like me 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Thank you for your fellowship Andrew and bless your kind heart ♥️ Jesus led me to your videos to help me heal from be tossed to the curb like trash after 22 years of devotion to a narcissist. I’m so moving on. 😅 Amen.
Welcome 😌💯🙏
I really appreciate how your videos are motivational and empowering in tone. Instead of just detailing how toxic they are because those types of videos leave me feeling defeated and powerless.
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I was so naive. Never again.
🤍You’re a very strong individual, Joe!!
Me too. Absolutely never again. I used to be someone who believed in not having any regrets. What’s happened has happened. Can’t change it. Now I accept that have one big enormous regret. Probably the same one as many on this channel! Committing to someone who not what they seemed.
They say don’t look back, move on. These relationships have such a profound effect on us. Many of us have been blighted by looking back because our brains have been trying to make sense of things that don’t make sense. But we are all moving on at different speeds and with hiccups in the way sometimes.
Sending ❤Onwards and upwards! 🏔 🌞
@@freebird968-wg4ye My conclusion is that every adage has loopholes. In this case, the info led me "looking way back" and it helped with healing and understanding puzzling past events."Out of sight, out of mind"-- Narc damage and poisonous rumination has them sticking in your mind for a while.Time and education from a channel like this, helps to get 'em out of your mind and reduces suffering. They'll fade eventually. We deserve a better life.
@@jhavajoe3792 Yes I agree. Thanks for replying. This channel is helping so much with people like you and others who validate and understand what we’ve experienced. We do deserve a better life and we will achieve this. Peace and blessings 🙏 💪 🌞
They do not live IN the moment
They live FOR the moment ❤🎉
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Yes God 💯💯💯 we want peace ❤️
😢YES. ❤❤ TRUTH
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You're so accurate that it's scary
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Your videos are off the charts lately. Rising 🌟🌟🌟
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Thank you Andrew
Welcome 😌🙏💯
Andrew, you are such a wise and kind soul ... how anyone could have treated you badly .... is beyond me. - - Thank you for helping so many of us.
At some point I realized the silent treatment is not just out of spite... it is because the narc is busy on their phone going through other supply and then I also realized later, the narc was only skin deep. She did not have anything substanitive to say. Nor was she interested in putting energy into talking about life with me because I was a temporary object, not "her person" like she liked to say. She said all the right things, even the devaluing was subtle, she had to control discard timing. She held things SO close to the chest. But her actions spoke louder and did not match her words. So the silence was a natural state of her shallow disengagement and I was to just be an object in the house she would pull down to play with at her whim. These people are toxic and sick. You are worth more!!
Thank you for sharing..💯💯😌🙏
This message helps so much. I would cry, asking “what have I done?” with his week long silent treatments. And he was always late, turned it on me and told people this. Family pictures he’d have made for 5:30 and told me 6. I’m not in the pictures and looked like a fool. I’d get dressed for special invites, wait for him and he’d come home, already gone to it. It took my daughter to make me see he was setting me up. All the times he was “at work,” the calls saying he’d be an hour. Now two. Now bedtime or whenever the hell he wanted. I had a sociopath father and histrionic mother, and that was torture x 2 plus. I hated confrontation and this created an easy pathway for the malignant narc I married.
Wow I really resonated with this so much. Thank you Andrew 🙏🏽
Welcome 😌🙏💯
Spot on as always ❤ Law of Mirrors. I speak Spanish (A little) and he had to try to learn the language
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I believe that I have gone through and still going through the 'Dark Night of the Soul'....I have thought of taking the easy way out.
He dismantled me to my core.
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Yup
You described my soon ex husband 💯.
Sadly, i was fooled and confused for 12 years. They do their dirty deeds intentionally 😈 so evil.
His one supply is his coworker, he abandoned our home and hes shacked up with her (for now). My husband used the silent treatment as he devalued me, whats mind boggling is it takes them energy to groom the next🤷♀️ My goodness, i wish i had realized what he was doing, i didn't realize until the brutal discard
2 months post discard and im still very tired
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Fantastic video thank you.god bless everyone who goes through this he's the one being that knows we don't exaggerate the pain and frustration he loves us and helps us just like you ❤❤
Welcome 😌🙏🙌
Hey, heeey Andrew and everyone ☀️❤️
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Yes Sir I Witnessed This Absolutely True.
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Excellent Andrew...so glad you have turned your pain into our gain.
We are blessed for the wisdom.
Thank you so very much, it makes it easier to understand & bare!
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Welcome 😌🙏🙌
Again, these videos have helped me in more ways than I can describe, I've stayed tuned for nearly two years now
Not sure if I've missed one of the videos that are elaborating on gray rock.. for me, that's where I'm at and what I'm lacking the most at this point with having to deal with the narcissistic antics and control issues. .
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You are hysterical.. 😅 And also TRUTH! 🤛❤️
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I did start to notice that he believed that if he refused to do my activities I would have to give them up since they were out of town, id alpine skiing. Little did he realize is that I would take off and do them on my own.
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So true!!
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As much as I ponder the dark night of the soul, which I did, I just can’t fathom how anyone can experience the dark night multiple times after discerning the “mask”. Once you learn to distinguish the iron cloaked beneath what appears to be gold, you know pure gold when to examine it; and you know gold-clad iron. Once you have the narcissist figured out I believe it’s impossible to experience the abusive traits of that creature twice. But maybe it depends on how much bright beautiful beings like feel we need to give our LOVE to narcissist or people who we perceive as hurting in some way. I don’t know.
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Thank you Andrew for the wisdow
Welcome 💯😌🙏