Ashley, I'm not your mom, but I am a mom and a grandma. I am so very proud of you. You inspire, teach and bring joy to so many on here. Know your worth, it's so much as a wife, a mother and a child of God. You and TJ have created a beautiful family, and I'm so sorry that your dad missed out on that, but we can't control others, only ourselves. You handled this video with grace, and I will be praying for you and for your dad that he's found his peace ❤❤
The only time I’ve ever met my biological father was when my mom took me to visit him in prison. I was probably 8 years old so I dont really remember much of it. We had no contact with him after that one visit. I know it’s for the best that I didn’t pursue a relationship with him, but I do feel bad for him. About 7 years ago while my mom was doing some research for a family tree project we found out that he passed away in prison and no one ever claimed his body. His mom was still alive but she refused it (to show how badly he had hurt her over the years). He was an abuser, an addict, a thief, untrustworthy, and just a really terrible person all around, yet I still feel some semblance of guilt knowing that he passed without anyone even caring enough to come get the body. We were never contacted and by the time we found out they had already buried him with the rest of the unclaimed people, wherever that is. I say all this just to let you know that you aren’t alone. What we’re born into doesn’t define what we can become. Your dad would 100% be proud of you if he had any idea what you have made of your life, and I think the same for myself.
I said the same to Ashley, part of the sadness is that you really never had a father. It's sadness, and a loss in and of itself. Now he knows what a wonderful boy your Mom raised. xo
Wow. This is such a powerful story and I think I'm not alone when I say I had no idea this happened to you. But it only makes the light you give the world shine even brighter and the beautiful life you lead with Hayley that much more inspiring. You're a chain-breaker as well. Thank you so much for sharing. ❤
I'm so sorry for all of the hurt and loss you have experienced, Ashley. I hope you know how much you radiate joy and authenticity on this platform, and that people really love you and look forward to watching you and hearing from you! You have always inspired me with your attitude and willingness to help and share, but you inspire me even more now. Thank you for sharing. ❤
Im proud of you Breaking the cycle is the hardest but bravest thing anyone can and should do in their life here on earth. I’ve had to break the cycle of sexual,verbal and physical abuse I suffered while growing up in my home with 12 siblings. I’m #11 of 13. My abuser was my own brother. It then extended into the other siblings with nasty verbal and mental abuse because I refused their abusive behavior. I’m afraid to go there and revisit the hurt in my heart because it’s soooo deep. Many times in my younger years I did therapy but all that did was re open the wounds but it did help my marriage. I’m 60 and married 42 yrs this March. Your video made me cry I know your deep pain and I wish it on no one. My own Mom called me a liar when I revealed the abuse. I grew stronger because of their abuse and you can too. Prayers for healing 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 Our Heavenly Father is why I’m still alive. Many dark days where I could be gone but prayer and faith saved me.
I have three children, and truly, I'm old enough to be your mother. It's with the heart of a mama I tell you, I'M PROUD OF YOU. You have done the number one job of a mother--protect your children. You've done the number one thing of a wife, you put your husband first. I'm proud how you run this your online presence. You are encouraging and fun. I wish you had the family everyone deserves. God is also your father as you know. He will walk through this grief with you and continue to heal your heart. {{{hugs}}}
Sweet girl, you are breaking the chain and your honesty is a blessing to all those who have experienced similar family struggles! You are loved sweet Ashley! God bless you and your family!❤
I lost my mother two years ago. Under similar cirumstances. After we did Not speak or See each other for more then 20 years. I am still going to Therapie and I am still healing. I am very much hurting about the fact that my mother Never loved me and it was a struggel to break the cycle . But I Never drunk alkohol or walked away from my amazing children. And there was no Moment that I missed to Tell them how much I love them Both. Someting that my mother Never Gold me growing up. Dont think it was all smoth sailing, because it was not. My Both marriages broke apart and I never, Till this day I had a healty relationship, but my Kids……I Tell you, I payed the price so they dont have to! Both Are amazing adults and on they Owen journey and I could not be more proud. I am impressed about your speach, you are right, we have to share our stuggels in life so that others dont feel so alone. I Hope someone , who needs that sees my post: IT WILL GETTING BETTER! AND AT THE END EVERYTHING IS WORTH IT! Thank you for your brave post and I am Sending Hugs from Germany PS: sorry for my Bad english. Love to everyone who needs it today ❤
Some people are narcissists and not nice people. Unfortunately, some are mothers. Usually, for them, it's not just a lack of empathy, but jealously. Ironically, it makes you a better mother. I wish you great success in your therapy.
I am having a similar estrangement for the same reasons. I felt I had to protect myself, my husband, and especially my children. I am amazed at what you have built and at how beautiful you and your family are.
Holy moly girl I didn’t know I was gonna be bawling my eyes out this whole video. What strength and grace you show!! I have been through similar things. God bless you!!
Aww Ashley, I can relate to this 100%. I lost my estranged father a few years back and felt the EXACT same way. You mourn the "what-if's" and "what could have/should have been's" and grieve the loss of the small sliver of hope for that change to occur in this lifetime. As an adult, I've come to forgive and move on after knowing what happened in his life and how that affected him - there's never excuses for it, but it helps to take a step back and try to understand maybe from a psychological level why they were the way they were. Strangely, my father was a truck driver too so this video hit very close to home. It's been 3.5 years and after a few moves I have finally started going through the boxes of his belongings that I got after his passing. It's nice to remember the good times and learn from the bad to stop the cycle with us and our families. Sending you all my love - to you and your healing - and of course to your beautiful family! You should be so proud of yourself for what you've created and what you've accomplished. And although you never heard those words from your parents...you can remind your kiddos every day how proud of them you are. And I know it doesn't quite heal the wounds when strangers say it - but I am proud of you and so very grateful for you. If I didn't stumble across your videos five years ago, who knows where I would be...I LOVE being a reseller...I am so in love with my life now and am a very happy military spouse that can work anywhere and everywhere and absolutely love being a "work at home dog mom" LOL. Sending you big hugs 🥰 thank you for sharing your story and vulnerability.
Sending big hugs. My biological father died a little over a year ago and we had been estranged for many decades due to his constant moral failures. Totally contrary to how they expected us to behave. He did horrible things things while married to my mom who died at 48 from leukemia from stress from his chosen lifestyle. He missed out on amazing family experiences and decades of joy with his original 4 children and grandchildren. His choice, his consequences. I never shed a tear when he passed. I still cry about all my lost pets and my heart still hurts about them. We cannot all have the fairy tale lives we dream of. You turned into an incredibly bright, caring, humorous, driven, amazing woman despite your family. You are beautiful and amazing and have created a loving fun family. You are such an inspiration to all....I always learn something positive when watching you...and I have been around for decades longer than you. You are beautiful inside and out. IAM SUBBED. So glad this came to my feed! You Tube is putting your new page out there for you. Hugs!
I am a 62 yo female, my dad passed when I was 35, he was not a nice person and worse as a parent... But losing him still hurt me deeply!!! U need to voice how you feel and there is not one good or bad way to grieve the loss of a loved one... no matter the circumstances!!! Keep your chin up!!!
This video really hit home. My wife and I were raised as Jehovah’s witnesses, and spent almost 40 years in the “religion”. During covid our eyes got opened to all the corruption and lies we had been fed our entire lives. We decided to leave the “religion” and that resulted in both sides of our family shunning us. Theoretically the next time I will hear from them is when they are on their death bed. And I’ve gone back and forth about how I would respond. I really appreciate you taking the time to make this video. It’s hard to put my feelings into words, but everything you said was so spot on. Best of luck to you!
Your story is so similar to mine. My wife and I are determined to break so many generational cycles in both of our families. I have been following you for years now. You are brave and have such a sweet family! Blessings to you :)
I'm so glad I am also following this channel. (I've followed your other channel for 3 years- fellow reseller). I had NO idea we shared so much in common. I lost my brother 5 years ago. I have a Dad who wasn't really ever in my life, and I've also protected my children from being hurt by him. I too have an amazing husband, amazing children, and a Heavenly Father who has filled the hole in my heart and then some. Thank you for your vulnerability. It's comforting to know that I'm not alone. Neither are you. We are Moms, Wives, Resellers, Daughters, etc, who go through rough times. But communities like this allow us to find comfort, hope, healing, and we can pray for each other. 💜
Ashley, one of the things I heard in a Sunday School class years ago, when I was a young Mom dealing with two parents that were alcoholics, was never apologize for your tears, as they are a message from God. That profound statement has remained in my heart for years. Life is hard and wonderful. There are so many struggles, but life is beautiful when we choose to embrace it with a spirit that there is so much love, kindness, and good, but we have to surround ourselves with people that love us and accept us for the imperfect people that we are. None of us are perfect, but you are doing a beautiful life with TJ and your sons. Praying for you as I totally understand some of the life issues you are dealing with each day. Please do not let this hold you back from being the beautiful, smart, kind woman that you are! Love and hugs.
I love and appreciate how honest and vulnerable you are in your videos. When my father passed away several years ago I was equally heartbroken and relieved. A lifetime of chaos and control had finally been broken, but I also lost someone who loved me the best he knew how and who I loved the best I could. The family you have created and nurture daily is a blessing. You have a community of people who think you are amazing, talented, and genuine. Keep being exactly who you are and thank you for sharing💕
Part of your sorrow is possibly (probably) not just that you lost your father, but sorrow b/c you didn't really "have" a father. That is in itself a loss in life...and brings tears and sadness on its own. You stepped back b/c as the saying goes, "enough is enough". You protected yourself and your own family which was your responsibility. It made you a better and extraordinary mother. Your father can now finally "see", and now knows what you do, how wonderful you are, and what a great family you have. Prayers Sent 🙏. Much Love.❤
Through 30 years of experience of trying to make my husband’s family fit into my idea of a loving family has only ended in heartbreak and deep hurt for my husband and daughters. I wish I could’ve come to this point years earlier. We have no control of others decisions. You are so smart to keep your family away from the disappointment and hurt. You’re an awesome mom and wife!❤
My daughter in law lost her father and it had been estranged. It was a different hard….she almost needed permission to mourn. I said that it’s a mourning of what should have been. What you deserved in a dad even though he wasn’t that. He missed out. That is something that you will mourn, sadly not the missing of a dad who you loved but one you deserved. But grieving is still necessary. Your embracing your dad in spite of the passed will bring healing and wholeness in your future and your Heavenly Father is the ultimate example of a father. And will meet you in your grief and bless you and your sweet family. ((Hugs))
Thanks for being vulnerable and sharing. I am also estranged from my dad and often worry about the day he passes how I'll feel. When you said when you see him again in heaven, it'll be like meeting your dad "for the first time." I just started crying. Never heard it put into words that way and feel so accurate. 😢❤
Ashley, I'm so sorry about your complicated loss, but I can understand. When you said the part about how you're grieving the person you wish he'd been, the relationship you wished you'd had, that resonated so much because that's exactly how I described it when my dad passed 14 years ago. Also like you said, my dad was a product of his upbringing and his environment and continued some not-healthy cycles, ones I, too, was determined to break and did. Hugs to you as you navigate the grieving process. It's different for everyone.
I'm so sorry about your loss. Family dysfunction is real and it's painful. Yes, we were created to be connected, to be in relationships. The enemy wants to divide and isolate us. Sometimes we have a choice to be connected, but sometimes we have to make the awful choice to stay away for our or our family's sake. Prayers for you as you grieve.
Thank you so much for sharing this! I felt your testimony so strongly watching this. You have helped people with this - I know you have. Never stop being who you are, following these prompts to share what you do. You touch so many lives, and we too are here for you. Praying for peace and comfort.
This was easily the best video that I’ve ever seen on RUclips, not because of your grief, but because of your perspective on life, relationships, and your love for God and others. It’s so difficult when we don’t get to experience love from our earthly parents the way it was designed, but it’s so amazing to watch you find it in your Heavenly Father. Praying for you as you process this and praying peace over you and your family’s hearts!❤ Also, as a mom to her newly born 4th baby, kuddos to you for taking a step back from reselling when you need to balance life with kids. I’m only doing it very part time currently, but am so thankful that I can do it with my kids in toe and without many babysitters required (even though a few more babysitting hours could be nice 😂)
I can see you're working hard on making your life with TJ and the kids what you didn't have growing up. That alone is successful and something to be proud of.
Sweet Ashley! You are not alone! I have been astranged from my family for 6 years, it was toxic and I has no choice! It hurts and it's hard but we deserve better! My Mother is 89 and I don't want to attended her funeral when the time comes. I forgive her but abusive is not something I miss! I understand your mixed emotions, because I had them to! Please live a happy joyful life! It's not your fault. Keeping you and your family in my thought's and prayer's.
I feel your pain. Please give yourself grace. Know you did the best thing for your family. Your dad is in a better place & is healing. I truly believe that. It’s opposite for me. I’m estranged from my son. Long story very short my husband loaned him money for a down payment on a house that fell through. Money we couldn’t afford to give. He promised he’d pay it back but instead he came over while my husband was at the heart Dr getting test done for heart surgery & cut him down, our home, & said my grandchildren couldn’t come back to my home. It’s been 6 months, I haven’t seen my grandchildren & it’s been a year since he borrowed the money. No repayment. The worst part is I’d talk to my 6 year old grandson almost every day. My heart is shattered because he had my granddaughter who I only saw 1 time before he did this. I don’t know what to do. Pray for us. Thank you.
My dad passed 5 years ago. He was the person who instilled in me the love of art, flowers, music, literature, and all the little extra things that give life depth. But he was also the enabler in a narcissistic, abusive family system. It's been hard processing it all. It won't ever be completely OK, but in my heart, he is at peace in his garden. And I am able to take the best gifts he gave me and the worst lessons to make my sphere a little better. Thank you, Ashley, for sharing. Each time one of us reaches out, we all feel a little less isolated and alone. ❤
My Mom passed a little over a year ago and although we weren't estranged it was super difficult to have any meaningful relationship with her because she was a very angry person to her immediate family. Blamed all of us at one time or another for the reason her life was horrible. She once told my sister that she ruined my Mom's life because she was just about to divorce our Dad when she got pregnant and then she couldn't leave. Always put on a good face to the outside world but in our family we really struggled to deal with her. It was so sad for me when she passed because I had always hoped that she could figure out her anger and resentment and blame and learn to enjoy her senior years but she didn't. I can only pray that she is now at peace. BTW, her life was NOT horrible. Classic middle American lifestyle and did not really want for anything. So, I get what you are saying. Sorry for your loss of not only your father but the life that you should have had growing up.
Thank you for sharing. You are so spot on when you said you morn the person and relationship you wish you had. I’m in my 60’s, my parents divorced when I was 10. My dad chose to stay away and married someone with 6 children and built relationships with her children whose children called him grandpa. I met with him after many years apart, he met my husband and my then 4 year old child. Talked about his “grandkids” and asked me when my birthday was…… very hurtful. I left the door open but he never came back through. I was blessed to have an amazing father in law who my children cherished. I didn’t morn the man but what could have been, he missed out. Bless you and your family and bravo for breaking the cycle. ❤❤
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my dad in 2007 and things continue to pop up that make me sad. However, there are things that will bring remembrance of good things/ times.
Ashley, your video is testament to how much personal power you have. Never doubt your strength. You have experienced very challenging times it sounds, and yet you are able to look for happiness inside all of the trauma and grief. You should be so very proud of you. And I see someone who is incredible, thoughtful, soulful...and I wish you were my neighbor. Take care and keep up the great personal and spiritual work you are doing. You've got this...hard as it may be.
Everything you said so beautiful. Relationships with “family“ are so complex and deep, and threaded through throughout all of our life. It doesn’t mean that we have to carry on when they do not bring us joy. I don’t have parents that were difficult, but I do have a sibling that I struggle with because as you so eloquently put it. There was a part of me that just wants it to work and I keep pushing through for those little glimmer of good moments. I do believe if it wasn’t for my niece and nephew who I want to have a relationship with I would’ve given up long before now.Because those people we love have more ability to hurt us than any stranger ever could, and sometimes sadly, they exploit that ability. I’m glad you’ve been able to find your peace and hold those in love close ❤
I knew I loved your show from the first time I watched it. Your care and love shine through and your ability to be real will help everyone who is fortunate enough to watch. Thank you for making my life better and for sharing your life with all of us. We are the lucky ones! 💚
Ashley...my heart breaks for you. I can relate to estrangement. My mother has been abusive my entire life. I also married a man who was an abusive alcoholic. We have since divorced, but the impact it had on our 2 sons has been horrible!!! I am not here to talk about me, but I want you to know that I am praying for you & your family. We do the best we can in this life by setting boudaries to guard us & our loved ones. The Lord will get you through...I promise. Trust in Him. Love you & your family, but GOD LOVES YOU MORE ❤❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏
Thank you so much for this video. I have been estranged from my parents most of my adult life. Like you always keeping an open door but I had to finally closed the door permanently. My Dad is dying and I’ve wrestled with seeing him one last time but I know it isn’t right despite how others may judge. I feel less alone knowing I am not the only one walking this terribly difficult road.
Sweet Ashley-First of all, I wish I could give you a big hug. You and TJ are so beautiful together and I just love your family. No family is perfect and some cycles carry on to the next generation, unfortunately. You have a wonderful life and you are such a loving mom to your awesome kids. You have broken that cycle. I’m sorry for your parents that they missed out on having a loving relationship with you, TJ and your kids. It is their loss. You are so genuinely real and lovely and I love watching your videos. You are enough. You are a wonderful mom and a wonderful wife and from what I can see, a wonderful friend. Instead of being sad for the relationships you don’t have, celebrate what you do have. I hate to see anyone cry but crying is a way to heal. You have lots of people that care about you. If you lived by me in Connecticut, I would invite you and your family to be part of our family. ❤️
Sorry for your loss Ashley. I was in a very similar situation. God is your true father. He created you and knows everything about you. We need to look to him for all of our needs. Our parents only know what they know. We can’t hate them for it. We can only take what they couldn’t give us and create our own life, as you mentioned break cycles. You’re in the right track with your thinking. Stay strong and give yourself time to heal and reflect.
Oh Ashley, as I sit here now bawling my eyes out, I am so glad that I stumbled across your channel many many years ago. You are such a joy to watch, and I can feel your kindness through my screen. So much of what you are struggling with right now resonates with me in my soul. Hence all the tears, lol. I am so glad that you have found peace with your decisions. I will continue to watch you and enjoy you. Thank you for sharing a small part of your life with us. Much love to you and your family right now. ❤
This is my life! We laid my father in-law to rest today. He was the same age and similar situation. We were his court appointed guardian. We loved him but endure so much pain from the rest of the family. I am so glad the lies, games and unnecessary drama is over. Please be kind to yourself. It is a tough road.
You are so beautiful inside & out Ashley. I am sorry you are dealing with a loss again & in this way. You hit the nail on the head in saying that your Heavenly Father is there always supporting you! He loves you just as you are & will never leave you nor forsake you 💜 You have overcome so much in your life & yes!! You have broken those chains & that is the most important thing you can do! Chains are of the enemy & when you broke them & refused to wear them, you broke that curse! That is why peace & freedom you have now. You have forgiven when most people wouldn't. You have continued on & made a wonderful home for your family & I see it in you all. You have many virtual Mamas, Aunt, sisters & Grammies for those sweet babies & for you. The naysayers...well whatever. You do you! If you need to cry, laugh, scream on YOUR channel, why yes you can! Much love to you & your fam! 💙🙏 In my prayers for sure!
My father passed away in October. He was my hero, my biggest cheerleader, and a true Patriot for the USA. I miss him so much. There was a 2-year period in which I was so angry with him, I would not even come home from college to see my family. The Lord helped me resolve that. It is the greatest gift I have ever been given. Thank you for sharing. You are gorgeous, dynamic, intelligent and talented!! I am so excited every time I see the notification that you have a new video. Thanks for everything you do!
How very gracious and kind you are. It’s so moving hearing you say kind words about someone who hurt you so much. The forgiveness that you have extended is amazing and will bring healing to your heart. I will pray for comfort and peace for you from our Heavenly Father.
😢😢 so sorry Ashley. Thank you for sharing such a vulnerable side of u, I am sure it’s not easy. I am crying with you with everything u r telling us, and I just wish I can give you a hug. I just want u to know I am sure he is proud of u, anyone and everyone that watches your journey is uber proud of u. You have an amazing family and u r doing soooo good 🙏🏻 Cal is such a smart and wise kid, u and TJ really taught him well ❤
My heart is with you Ashley. My dad was a wonderful person, when he wasn't drinking. He worked hard to keep us safe, warm and fed. When he would drink, however, it was like Jekyll and Hyde. When he passed away, it took me years to work through the abuse and everything he had done to tear our family apart. Like you, I made a choice to break the chain of abuse when my kiddo was born. Now, I am healed from the pain and I miss him so dearly! It takes a lot to see the real person sometimes, and it is extraordinary that you are able to see the good in your dad despite all the hurt. Hugs!
It's so difficult to lose an estranged parent. I lost my dad in my early 20s. It was heartbreaking to know that we would never get the chance to have a relationship. The one thing it did teach me is to nurture the positive relationships in my life. That's what you're doing. I'm not a mom but I love your channels. You are so inspirational and become even more so the more I learn about you. I love your videos and love you and your family. Thank you so much for sharing with us all.
Thank you so much for all that you do, and for sharing so much of yourself. There are many of us who can relate and share space with you as well. Sending the love back to you and hoping you feel the peace through this most difficult time. Stay strong and keep doing what you do!!
Thank you for sharing God has a purpose and a reason for each of us and I believe you have found yours!!! You reach soooo many people through your platform that need to hear what you and God have to tell them and that’s simply there not alone they are loved and will always be cherished by God !!! I pray God surrounds you with his healing light and love!!!
There is so much I want to say. I am so very sorry for what you are going through! I love both your channels. I'm in my 50's. My husband stopped wanting to live. He has congestive heart failure and end stage renal. My parents are both older and there are other things going on. I have had to quit my job and you inspire me so much to keep going! Thank you for being open and real!! You are such an amazing person!! Praying for you and your beautiful family! You truly are not alone!❤. Sending much love your way!! Thank you and I'm so very sorry!💕
Family estrangement is so tough I have been through it and you are correct we all do the best we can with the circumstances we are given. Keep going you will get through it but like I say never get over it. You have a wonderful family and you are such a wonderful person. I don’t really ever comment on these videos but I felt like I needed to on this video. ❤️🙏
Give yourself Grace! I am crying with you for your deep loss of family, but sometimes you have to love family from a distance, and it sounds like you have done that well. You have a kind heart and sweet spirit that will continue to serve you well in life!
I love that you are being so open with us. When raised badly we need to break the mold. We are all created with our own will, and you have proved that molds can be changed. You created your own, and your beautiful family is proof.😊
You are so amazing and brave for what you've done. My sisters and I are dealing with non participating parents. I am now at peace with all I have been thru. I believe that God doesn't give u more than u can handle. Stay strong and keep moving forward... MUCH LOVE!!!
Same thing happened to me in 2008….the way I found out no one would believe it was definitely God and my angels way of protecting me. Just know it’s ok to grief the way you can and good to let go any hard feelings. Hopefully your father was sorry in the end.❤
Ashley your story made me realise I'm not alone with the same struggle. My father now 81, was abusive towards my mother and myself. After they split he left me behind, but took my younger brother for weekends, holidays etc. Then over the years he remarried (I wasn't told for 6 months) had another child ( I again wasn't told) ,but not once did he contact me. Out of the blue he rang about 15 years later and told me I was always his little girl 😢, then nothing again for years. He's missed out on my sons lives. I realised he's a lost cause. I've deleted him from my life but I still love him, he's my dad. I totally understand where your coming from. I dread the day my father leaves this earth. Thank you for telling us your story ❤❤❤
Ashley, You have such a sweet and gentle soul. I so appreciate you for using this platform for good. What you just did here was so difficult and as a viewer, a mom and a woman, I applaud you. This is so, so healing. You showed us a raw vulnerable side of yourself and it has helped so many others. Reading through the comments I also see that we all have gone through issues with our parents and versions of estrangement. Your experience is your own and I just want to add how much I love hearing you say such beautiful and loving things about T.J.! You appear to have such love and a great relationship. At this time that is so important. Lean into him and into your faith (footprint in sand comes to mind). You are beautiful. You are loved. You are worthy. Hugs
I'm sorry for you loss and I can relate, I havent seen my dad in 25 yrs, he wasnt always nice to me and my mom. Sometimes you can wish someone well but cant be together. You are doing the best you can, that's all we can do, boundaries are sometimes needed. Concentrate on you and your beautiful family. Best wishes.
You’re beautiful inside and out! Your gentle and loving relationships with your children are a testament to your commitment to build a better future for yourself and for them. ❤
Ashley you are stepping into your own. You have faith and it will help you in healing. You have an awesome husband and three great kids. I will keep praying for you that you will find peace and all the joy God has to offer.
Wow! I just found your second channel and all I can is wow! I have learned so much from you on your selling channel and now it's so refreshing to see someone who isn't afraid to be vulnerable if it helps someone else. I too lost my dad 6 years ago. He left our family when I was 4 and my brother was 6 (I'm now 61!) Although he lived in the same city we only saw him on Christmas Eve. It took me many years to not take it personally. Once I became an adult with problems of my own I realized he "did the best he could" in the time and space he was in. I chose to forgive and move on with a relationship with him. I love how you said you believe now that your dad is healing. I believe that too. I think when we get to the other side we'll get the opportunity to review our lives and our eyes will be opened to any hurt we may have caused to people we love. Then we'll be able to forgive OURSELVES for our imperfections and prepare for our heavenly reunion one day. My heart goes out to you and I feel your pain, yet, I also sense your strength and determination to live peacefully and change the trajectory of your children's lives by acknowledging your pain and using it to set a better example for them. God bless you and your sweet family! Thank you for your videos! You are one amazing woman!
Gal I'm so sorry all this has happen to you. You don't forget but you can forgive in your heart. You don't forget you just put it all on a shelf. You just give all that love to your two beautiful boys and that wonderful husband. Do for them what was not done for you. Stay postive and stay strong.😅🎉❤
Ashley, keeping your family safe was the best decision you could make. Sometimes we have to cut ties with family, even though they are blood. Toxic is toxic, no matter how close they were at one time. Prayers for your healing!❤
Amen my sweet friend 🙏🏽 I understand. I am a caregiver to my 87 year old mom who doesn’t like me because I am a product of her first marriage. But I am called to still take care of her. I too know my Heavenly Father is here with me as he is with you. Love your family 🥰
You’re a rock star Ashley. You’re just so chill being u drinking ur cokes lol and your family is adorable. I always get excited to see your thrifting videos pop up. You’ve grown your channel and business beautifully. I’m proud of u giiiiirl lol We’re all just out here doing the best we can with the cards we are dealt. But very happy you love your life with TJ and the kids. God bless 😘❤️ … Sorry for the loss, completely understand mourning the idea of the parents you wish you had
I so super love that you made this channel. I will be following both. I have said it before and I’ll say it again you are the reason I became a reseller and the reason I get to be home with my littles 🫶🏼 I also seen a video that you did with your husband and y’all were managers in Oakland ca. I’m from Oakland ca. both my parents passed when I was 10 and 11 from drugs and alcohol so I feel ya on the passing. I love them but also resent them for the way they raised us for the short time they did. I to was a resident manager in Santa Rosa ca for 13 years to many 😂 takes a whole bunch of patience for that job doesn’t it? Anyhow girl I love your videos. Love seeing you interact with your family it’s very joyful and you can see so much love. Sending big hugs to you 🫶🏼
Have also had a pretty similar experience. It has helped me listen to your story and the other stories in the comments. Thank you for that. Stay strong and hug that beautiful family of yours for all of us.
You are not cringey whatsoever! I am praying for you too and I thoroughly enjoy your channel and all your experiences you share. I have learned A LOT from you and know I will continue to. Yes, YOUR DAD IS PROUD OF YOU!❤
Sending you a big hug for being so real and vulnerable! I too had some challenges growing up, so this video brought back a flood of emotion. Thanks for sharing. You are an amazing spirit!
Talking about what happened is good for you ,you are amazing young lady. Amazing mum and wife ,sadly your dad missed out on a wonderful human being and still after all that’s happened you are giving him praise , broke my heart listening to you stay strong young lady
Oh Ashley we all have a story. Thanks for sharing yours. Blessings to you and you wonderful family. I am a grandma and have seen lots of life. I am so blessed. Been a widow for 22 years and that is another lifetime, so long ago. You always inspire me with your videos and teaching. So look forward to viewing them. Always looking to see if you have a new one out. At my age you miss those that are gone. 2 days ago was blessed with a new friend that I can do things with. Huge as this point when many have issues and cannot do things. Praying for you and your family. You are so special in so many ways. Blessings.
The most beautiful thing about a tragic story is when the person like you Ashley has been saved, rescue and brought into the promise by Jesus Christ. My husband has a very similar story as yours, all his life he grew up between strangers, drugs, abuse, abusers, violence and at the last minute of his dad's life he was only 34 years old when he was dying in the hospital my husband just a teen went after hesitation from all the pain his father caused him, but every story is different, his father in such a bizarre way he probably knew his time was coming up and knowing about Jesus when he was much younger, he asked for forgiveness, and asked my husband to keep God near and get near him. To my husband those were words of no means because his father never showed him God's love or his as a father, but many years later when he had an encounter with Jesus he then remembered his father's last words and it made sense, God was always there even in the middle of the dark stormy days, He was the one keeping him alive. And now he is the father to my children and he is nothing like his dad even with his own struggles of emotions some days is hard but I remind him, who he is now, who is his father, and that his own father is very proud of the men if God he has become ❤
Ashley, The one thing I want "You" to take from this video is what you said. "You" have the power to change the cycle of how you were raised and, from what I see you are doing just that. Be proud, you are a wonderful mom and have a great husband to change that cycle.
Ashley my Thoughts & Prayers are with you during this hard time. You have a Beautiful Family that's fills your hearts with love & happiness! I'm so Proud of you, to see how much you have accomplished so young You & TJ work so hard with such dedication & a wonderful work ethic. I agree that one day you will see your father again & he will see you for his first time as the wonderfully amazing person you are!❣
Ashley, I'm not your mom, but I am a mom and a grandma. I am so very proud of you. You inspire, teach and bring joy to so many on here. Know your worth, it's so much as a wife, a mother and a child of God. You and TJ have created a beautiful family, and I'm so sorry that your dad missed out on that, but we can't control others, only ourselves. You handled this video with grace, and I will be praying for you and for your dad that he's found his peace ❤❤
❤❤❤❤❤❤
AMEN
Yep, what she said!
❤Ashley made God comfort you during this difficult time. You are awesome and very much loved by you utube family ❤❤❤❤
The only time I’ve ever met my biological father was when my mom took me to visit him in prison. I was probably 8 years old so I dont really remember much of it. We had no contact with him after that one visit. I know it’s for the best that I didn’t pursue a relationship with him, but I do feel bad for him. About 7 years ago while my mom was doing some research for a family tree project we found out that he passed away in prison and no one ever claimed his body. His mom was still alive but she refused it (to show how badly he had hurt her over the years).
He was an abuser, an addict, a thief, untrustworthy, and just a really terrible person all around, yet I still feel some semblance of guilt knowing that he passed without anyone even caring enough to come get the body. We were never contacted and by the time we found out they had already buried him with the rest of the unclaimed people, wherever that is.
I say all this just to let you know that you aren’t alone. What we’re born into doesn’t define what we can become. Your dad would 100% be proud of you if he had any idea what you have made of your life, and I think the same for myself.
I said the same to Ashley, part of the sadness is that you really never had a father.
It's sadness, and a loss in and of itself. Now he knows what a wonderful boy your Mom raised. xo
Wow. This is such a powerful story and I think I'm not alone when I say I had no idea this happened to you. But it only makes the light you give the world shine even brighter and the beautiful life you lead with Hayley that much more inspiring. You're a chain-breaker as well. Thank you so much for sharing. ❤
That is so sad.
❤❤
ashley...don't hide...the world needs strong, intelligent women like you!!! you should be so proud...you broke the cycle!!! prayers
Grief can be very complicated - take good care of yourself during this raw time ♥️😔
I'm so sorry for all of the hurt and loss you have experienced, Ashley. I hope you know how much you radiate joy and authenticity on this platform, and that people really love you and look forward to watching you and hearing from you! You have always inspired me with your attitude and willingness to help and share, but you inspire me even more now. Thank you for sharing. ❤
Im proud of you Breaking the cycle is the hardest but bravest thing anyone can and should do in their life here on earth.
I’ve had to break the cycle of sexual,verbal and physical abuse I suffered while growing up in my home with 12 siblings.
I’m #11 of 13.
My abuser was my own brother. It then extended into the other siblings with nasty verbal and mental abuse because I refused their abusive behavior.
I’m afraid to go there and revisit the hurt in my heart because it’s soooo deep.
Many times in my younger years I did therapy but all that did was re open the wounds but it did help my marriage.
I’m 60 and married 42 yrs this March.
Your video made me cry I know your deep pain and I wish it on no one.
My own Mom called me a liar when I revealed the abuse.
I grew stronger because of their abuse and you can too.
Prayers for healing 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
Our Heavenly Father is why I’m still alive. Many dark days where I could be gone but prayer and faith saved me.
Honesty is so important. It’s hard sometimes, but we can’t walk in the light without it.
I have three children, and truly, I'm old enough to be your mother. It's with the heart of a mama I tell you, I'M PROUD OF YOU. You have done the number one job of a mother--protect your children. You've done the number one thing of a wife, you put your husband first. I'm proud how you run this your online presence. You are encouraging and fun. I wish you had the family everyone deserves. God is also your father as you know. He will walk through this grief with you and continue to heal your heart. {{{hugs}}}
Sweet girl, you are breaking the chain and your honesty is a blessing to all those who have experienced similar family struggles!
You are loved sweet Ashley! God bless you and your family!❤
I lost my mother two years ago. Under similar cirumstances. After we did Not speak or See each other for more then 20 years. I am still going to Therapie and I am still healing. I am very much hurting about the fact that my mother Never loved me and it was a struggel to break the cycle . But I Never drunk alkohol or walked away from my amazing children. And there was no Moment that I missed to Tell them how much I love them Both. Someting that my mother Never Gold me growing up.
Dont think it was all smoth sailing, because it was not. My Both marriages broke apart and I never, Till this day I had a healty relationship, but my Kids……I Tell you, I payed the price so they dont have to! Both Are amazing adults and on they Owen journey and I could not be more proud.
I am impressed about your speach, you are right, we have to share our stuggels in life so that others dont feel so alone. I Hope someone , who needs that sees my post:
IT WILL GETTING BETTER!
AND AT THE END EVERYTHING IS WORTH IT!
Thank you for your brave post and I am Sending Hugs from Germany
PS: sorry for my Bad english.
Love to everyone who needs it today ❤
Some people are narcissists and not nice people. Unfortunately, some are mothers. Usually, for them, it's not just a lack of empathy, but jealously. Ironically, it makes you a better mother. I wish you great success in your therapy.
@@Snoops510thank you for your kind words. Healing is a journey but it’s worth it. Sending hugs. 😊
I am having a similar estrangement for the same reasons. I felt I had to protect myself, my husband, and especially my children. I am amazed at what you have built and at how beautiful you and your family are.
Holy moly girl I didn’t know I was gonna be bawling my eyes out this whole video. What strength and grace you show!! I have been through similar things. God bless you!!
Aww Ashley, I can relate to this 100%. I lost my estranged father a few years back and felt the EXACT same way. You mourn the "what-if's" and "what could have/should have been's" and grieve the loss of the small sliver of hope for that change to occur in this lifetime. As an adult, I've come to forgive and move on after knowing what happened in his life and how that affected him - there's never excuses for it, but it helps to take a step back and try to understand maybe from a psychological level why they were the way they were. Strangely, my father was a truck driver too so this video hit very close to home. It's been 3.5 years and after a few moves I have finally started going through the boxes of his belongings that I got after his passing. It's nice to remember the good times and learn from the bad to stop the cycle with us and our families. Sending you all my love - to you and your healing - and of course to your beautiful family! You should be so proud of yourself for what you've created and what you've accomplished. And although you never heard those words from your parents...you can remind your kiddos every day how proud of them you are. And I know it doesn't quite heal the wounds when strangers say it - but I am proud of you and so very grateful for you. If I didn't stumble across your videos five years ago, who knows where I would be...I LOVE being a reseller...I am so in love with my life now and am a very happy military spouse that can work anywhere and everywhere and absolutely love being a "work at home dog mom" LOL. Sending you big hugs 🥰 thank you for sharing your story and vulnerability.
Sending big hugs. My biological father died a little over a year ago and we had been estranged for many decades due to his constant moral failures. Totally contrary to how they expected us to behave. He did horrible things things while married to my mom who died at 48 from leukemia from stress from his chosen lifestyle. He missed out on amazing family experiences and decades of joy with his original 4 children and grandchildren. His choice, his consequences. I never shed a tear when he passed. I still cry about all my lost pets and my heart still hurts about them. We cannot all have the fairy tale lives we dream of. You turned into an incredibly bright, caring, humorous, driven, amazing woman despite your family. You are beautiful and amazing and have created a loving fun family. You are such an inspiration to all....I always learn something positive when watching you...and I have been around for decades longer than you. You are beautiful inside and out. IAM SUBBED. So glad this came to my feed! You Tube is putting your new page out there for you. Hugs!
I am a 62 yo female, my dad passed when I was 35, he was not a nice person and worse as a parent... But losing him still hurt me deeply!!! U need to voice how you feel and there is not one good or bad way to grieve the loss of a loved one... no matter the circumstances!!! Keep your chin up!!!
This video really hit home. My wife and I were raised as Jehovah’s witnesses, and spent almost 40 years in the “religion”. During covid our eyes got opened to all the corruption and lies we had been fed our entire lives. We decided to leave the “religion” and that resulted in both sides of our family shunning us. Theoretically the next time I will hear from them is when they are on their death bed. And I’ve gone back and forth about how I would respond. I really appreciate you taking the time to make this video. It’s hard to put my feelings into words, but everything you said was so spot on. Best of luck to you!
Your story is so similar to mine. My wife and I are determined to break so many generational cycles in both of our families. I have been following you for years now. You are brave and have such a sweet family! Blessings to you :)
I'm so glad I am also following this channel. (I've followed your other channel for 3 years- fellow reseller). I had NO idea we shared so much in common. I lost my brother 5 years ago. I have a Dad who wasn't really ever in my life, and I've also protected my children from being hurt by him. I too have an amazing husband, amazing children, and a Heavenly Father who has filled the hole in my heart and then some. Thank you for your vulnerability. It's comforting to know that I'm not alone. Neither are you. We are Moms, Wives, Resellers, Daughters, etc, who go through rough times. But communities like this allow us to find comfort, hope, healing, and we can pray for each other. 💜
So sorry for your loss. Hang in there. God is good.
I resonate with this video so much. Thanks for sharing Ashley
So sorry for your loss.😢
Ashley, one of the things I heard in a Sunday School class years ago, when I was a young Mom dealing with two parents that were alcoholics, was never apologize for your tears, as they are a message from God. That profound statement has remained in my heart for years. Life is hard and wonderful. There are so many struggles, but life is beautiful when we choose to embrace it with a spirit that there is so much love, kindness, and good, but we have to surround ourselves with people that love us and accept us for the imperfect people that we are. None of us are perfect, but you are doing a beautiful life with TJ and your sons. Praying for you as I totally understand some of the life issues you are dealing with each day. Please do not let this hold you back from being the beautiful, smart, kind woman that you are! Love and hugs.
I love and appreciate how honest and vulnerable you are in your videos. When my father passed away several years ago I was equally heartbroken and relieved. A lifetime of chaos and control had finally been broken, but I also lost someone who loved me the best he knew how and who I loved the best I could. The family you have created and nurture daily is a blessing. You have a community of people who think you are amazing, talented, and genuine. Keep being exactly who you are and thank you for sharing💕
Part of your sorrow is possibly (probably) not just that you lost your father, but sorrow b/c you didn't really "have" a father. That is in itself a loss in life...and brings tears and sadness on its own. You stepped back b/c as the saying goes, "enough is enough". You protected yourself and your own family which was your responsibility. It made you a better and extraordinary mother. Your father can now finally "see", and now knows what you do, how wonderful you are, and what a great family you have. Prayers Sent 🙏. Much Love.❤
Through 30 years of experience of trying to make my husband’s family fit into my idea of a loving family has only ended in heartbreak and deep hurt for my husband and daughters. I wish I could’ve come to this point years earlier. We have no control of others decisions. You are so smart to keep your family away from the disappointment and hurt. You’re an awesome mom and wife!❤
Oh sweet girl, you are truly a blessing to all of us…keep going! 💕
My daughter in law lost her father and it had been estranged. It was a different hard….she almost needed permission to mourn. I said that it’s a mourning of what should have been. What you deserved in a dad even though he wasn’t that. He missed out. That is something that you will mourn, sadly not the missing of a dad who you loved but one you deserved. But grieving is still necessary. Your embracing your dad in spite of the passed will bring healing and wholeness in your future and your Heavenly Father is the ultimate example of a father. And will meet you in your grief and bless you and your sweet family. ((Hugs))
You are a brave, wonderful woman. Thank you for sharing 🙏
Thanks for being vulnerable and sharing. I am also estranged from my dad and often worry about the day he passes how I'll feel. When you said when you see him again in heaven, it'll be like meeting your dad "for the first time." I just started crying. Never heard it put into words that way and feel so accurate. 😢❤
Ashley, I'm so sorry about your complicated loss, but I can understand. When you said the part about how you're grieving the person you wish he'd been, the relationship you wished you'd had, that resonated so much because that's exactly how I described it when my dad passed 14 years ago. Also like you said, my dad was a product of his upbringing and his environment and continued some not-healthy cycles, ones I, too, was determined to break and did. Hugs to you as you navigate the grieving process. It's different for everyone.
I'm so sorry about your loss. Family dysfunction is real and it's painful. Yes, we were created to be connected, to be in relationships. The enemy wants to divide and isolate us. Sometimes we have a choice to be connected, but sometimes we have to make the awful choice to stay away for our or our family's sake. Prayers for you as you grieve.
Thank you so much for sharing this! I felt your testimony so strongly watching this. You have helped people with this - I know you have. Never stop being who you are, following these prompts to share what you do. You touch so many lives, and we too are here for you. Praying for peace and comfort.
This was easily the best video that I’ve ever seen on RUclips, not because of your grief, but because of your perspective on life, relationships, and your love for God and others. It’s so difficult when we don’t get to experience love from our earthly parents the way it was designed, but it’s so amazing to watch you find it in your Heavenly Father. Praying for you as you process this and praying peace over you and your family’s hearts!❤ Also, as a mom to her newly born 4th baby, kuddos to you for taking a step back from reselling when you need to balance life with kids. I’m only doing it very part time currently, but am so thankful that I can do it with my kids in toe and without many babysitters required (even though a few more babysitting hours could be nice 😂)
Awe...so sorry to hear about your loss. You are a strong, smart and successful woman who is an amazing mom. Remember that every day! Hugs to you!
I can see you're working hard on making your life with TJ and the kids what you didn't have growing up. That alone is successful and something to be proud of.
Sweet Ashley! You are not alone! I have been astranged from my family for 6 years, it was toxic and I has no choice! It hurts and it's hard but we deserve better! My Mother is 89 and I don't want to attended her funeral when the time comes. I forgive her but abusive is not something I miss! I understand your mixed emotions, because I had them to! Please live a happy joyful life! It's not your fault. Keeping you and your family in my thought's and prayer's.
I feel your pain. Please give yourself grace. Know you did the best thing for your family. Your dad is in a better place & is healing. I truly believe that. It’s opposite for me. I’m estranged from my son. Long story very short my husband loaned him money for a down payment on a house that fell through. Money we couldn’t afford to give. He promised he’d pay it back but instead he came over while my husband was at the heart Dr getting test done for heart surgery & cut him down, our home, & said my grandchildren couldn’t come back to my home. It’s been 6 months, I haven’t seen my grandchildren & it’s been a year since he borrowed the money. No repayment. The worst part is I’d talk to my 6 year old grandson almost every day. My heart is shattered because he had my granddaughter who I only saw 1 time before he did this. I don’t know what to do. Pray for us. Thank you.
My dad passed 5 years ago. He was the person who instilled in me the love of art, flowers, music, literature, and all the little extra things that give life depth. But he was also the enabler in a narcissistic, abusive family system. It's been hard processing it all. It won't ever be completely OK, but in my heart, he is at peace in his garden. And I am able to take the best gifts he gave me and the worst lessons to make my sphere a little better. Thank you, Ashley, for sharing. Each time one of us reaches out, we all feel a little less isolated and alone. ❤
My Mom passed a little over a year ago and although we weren't estranged it was super difficult to have any meaningful relationship with her because she was a very angry person to her immediate family. Blamed all of us at one time or another for the reason her life was horrible. She once told my sister that she ruined my Mom's life because she was just about to divorce our Dad when she got pregnant and then she couldn't leave. Always put on a good face to the outside world but in our family we really struggled to deal with her. It was so sad for me when she passed because I had always hoped that she could figure out her anger and resentment and blame and learn to enjoy her senior years but she didn't. I can only pray that she is now at peace. BTW, her life was NOT horrible. Classic middle American lifestyle and did not really want for anything. So, I get what you are saying. Sorry for your loss of not only your father but the life that you should have had growing up.
Thank you for sharing. You are so spot on when you said you morn the person and relationship you wish you had. I’m in my 60’s, my parents divorced when I was 10. My dad chose to stay away and married someone with 6 children and built relationships with her children whose children called him grandpa. I met with him after many years apart, he met my husband and my then 4 year old child. Talked about his “grandkids” and asked me when my birthday was…… very hurtful. I left the door open but he never came back through. I was blessed to have an amazing father in law who my children cherished. I didn’t morn the man but what could have been, he missed out. Bless you and your family and bravo for breaking the cycle. ❤❤
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my dad in 2007 and things continue to pop up that make me sad. However, there are things that will bring remembrance of good things/ times.
I am so sorry Ashley!! You have such a beautiful soul!
So sorry for your loss, my dad was not a great man, but it’s still a loss. My prayers are with you.
Ashley, your video is testament to how much personal power you have. Never doubt your strength. You have experienced very challenging times it sounds, and yet you are able to look for happiness inside all of the trauma and grief. You should be so very proud of you. And I see someone who is incredible, thoughtful, soulful...and I wish you were my neighbor. Take care and keep up the great personal and spiritual work you are doing. You've got this...hard as it may be.
Everything you said so beautiful. Relationships with “family“ are so complex and deep, and threaded through throughout all of our life. It doesn’t mean that we have to carry on when they do not bring us joy. I don’t have parents that were difficult, but I do have a sibling that I struggle with because as you so eloquently put it. There was a part of me that just wants it to work and I keep pushing through for those little glimmer of good moments. I do believe if it wasn’t for my niece and nephew who I want to have a relationship with I would’ve given up long before now.Because those people we love have more ability to hurt us than any stranger ever could, and sometimes sadly, they exploit that ability. I’m glad you’ve been able to find your peace and hold those in love close ❤
I knew I loved your show from the first time I watched it. Your care and love shine through and your ability to be real will help everyone who is fortunate enough to watch. Thank you for making my life better and for sharing your life with all of us. We are the lucky ones! 💚
Ashley...my heart breaks for you. I can relate to estrangement. My mother has been abusive my entire life. I also married a man who was an abusive alcoholic. We have since divorced, but the impact it had on our 2 sons has been horrible!!! I am not here to talk about me, but I want you to know that I am praying for you & your family. We do the best we can in this life by setting boudaries to guard us & our loved ones. The Lord will get you through...I promise. Trust in Him. Love you & your family, but GOD LOVES YOU MORE ❤❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏
You are a daughter of the Most High God! And loved beyond comprehension.
Thank you so much for this video. I have been estranged from my parents most of my adult life. Like you always keeping an open door but I had to finally closed the door permanently. My Dad is dying and I’ve wrestled with seeing him one last time but I know it isn’t right despite how others may judge.
I feel less alone knowing I am not the only one walking this terribly difficult road.
Sweet Ashley-First of all, I wish I could give you a big hug. You and TJ are so beautiful together and I just love your family. No family is perfect and some cycles carry on to the next generation, unfortunately. You have a wonderful life and you are such a loving mom to your awesome kids. You have broken that cycle. I’m sorry for your parents that they missed out on having a loving relationship with you, TJ and your kids. It is their loss. You are so genuinely real and lovely and I love watching your videos. You are enough. You are a wonderful mom and a wonderful wife and from what I can see, a wonderful friend. Instead of being sad for the relationships you don’t have, celebrate what you do have. I hate to see anyone cry but crying is a way to heal. You have lots of people that care about you. If you lived by me in Connecticut, I would invite you and your family to be part of our family. ❤️
Sorry for your loss Ashley. I was in a very similar situation. God is your true father. He created you and knows everything about you. We need to look to him for all of our needs. Our parents only know what they know. We can’t hate them for it. We can only take what they couldn’t give us and create our own life, as you mentioned break cycles. You’re in the right track with your thinking. Stay strong and give yourself time to heal and reflect.
Oh Ashley, as I sit here now bawling my eyes out, I am so glad that I stumbled across your channel many many years ago. You are such a joy to watch, and I can feel your kindness through my screen. So much of what you are struggling with right now resonates with me in my soul. Hence all the tears, lol. I am so glad that you have found peace with your decisions. I will continue to watch you and enjoy you. Thank you for sharing a small part of your life with us. Much love to you and your family right now. ❤
This is my life! We laid my father in-law to rest today. He was the same age and similar situation. We were his court appointed guardian. We loved him but endure so much pain from the rest of the family. I am so glad the lies, games and unnecessary drama is over. Please be kind to yourself. It is a tough road.
You are so beautiful inside & out Ashley. I am sorry you are dealing with a loss again & in this way. You hit the nail on the head in saying that your Heavenly Father is there always supporting you! He loves you just as you are & will never leave you nor forsake you 💜 You have overcome so much in your life & yes!! You have broken those chains & that is the most important thing you can do! Chains are of the enemy & when you broke them & refused to wear them, you broke that curse! That is why peace & freedom you have now. You have forgiven when most people wouldn't. You have continued on & made a wonderful home for your family & I see it in you all. You have many virtual Mamas, Aunt, sisters & Grammies for those sweet babies & for you. The naysayers...well whatever. You do you! If you need to cry, laugh, scream on YOUR channel, why yes you can! Much love to you & your fam! 💙🙏 In my prayers for sure!
My father passed away in October. He was my hero, my biggest cheerleader, and a true Patriot for the USA. I miss him so much. There was a 2-year period in which I was so angry with him, I would not even come home from college to see my family. The Lord helped me resolve that. It is the greatest gift I have ever been given. Thank you for sharing. You are gorgeous, dynamic, intelligent and talented!! I am so excited every time I see the notification that you have a new video. Thanks for everything you do!
How very gracious and kind you are. It’s so moving hearing you say kind words about someone who hurt you so much. The forgiveness that you have extended is amazing and will bring healing to your heart. I will pray for comfort and peace for you from our Heavenly Father.
😢😢 so sorry Ashley. Thank you for sharing such a vulnerable side of u, I am sure it’s not easy. I am crying with you with everything u r telling us, and I just wish I can give you a hug. I just want u to know I am sure he is proud of u, anyone and everyone that watches your journey is uber proud of u. You have an amazing family and u r doing soooo good 🙏🏻 Cal is such a smart and wise kid, u and TJ really taught him well ❤
I’m so proud of you. Praying for you!
My heart is with you Ashley. My dad was a wonderful person, when he wasn't drinking. He worked hard to keep us safe, warm and fed. When he would drink, however, it was like Jekyll and Hyde. When he passed away, it took me years to work through the abuse and everything he had done to tear our family apart. Like you, I made a choice to break the chain of abuse when my kiddo was born. Now, I am healed from the pain and I miss him so dearly! It takes a lot to see the real person sometimes, and it is extraordinary that you are able to see the good in your dad despite all the hurt. Hugs!
Hugs love and much happiness! You are worthy of all the positivity this community can offer.
It's so difficult to lose an estranged parent. I lost my dad in my early 20s. It was heartbreaking to know that we would never get the chance to have a relationship. The one thing it did teach me is to nurture the positive relationships in my life. That's what you're doing. I'm not a mom but I love your channels. You are so inspirational and become even more so the more I learn about you. I love your videos and love you and your family. Thank you so much for sharing with us all.
Thank you so much for all that you do, and for sharing so much of yourself. There are many of us who can relate and share space with you as well. Sending the love back to you and hoping you feel the peace through this most difficult time. Stay strong and keep doing what you do!!
Thank you for sharing God has a purpose and a reason for each of us and I believe you have found yours!!! You reach soooo many people through your platform that need to hear what you and God have to tell them and that’s simply there not alone they are loved and will always be cherished by God !!! I pray God surrounds you with his healing light and love!!!
There is so much I want to say. I am so very sorry for what you are going through! I love both your channels. I'm in my 50's. My husband stopped wanting to live. He has congestive heart failure and end stage renal. My parents are both older and there are other things going on. I have had to quit my job and you inspire me so much to keep going! Thank you for being open and real!! You are such an amazing person!! Praying for you and your beautiful family! You truly are not alone!❤. Sending much love your way!! Thank you and I'm so very sorry!💕
Family estrangement is so tough I have been through it and you are correct we all do the best we can with the circumstances we are given. Keep going you will get through it but like I say never get over it. You have a wonderful family and you are such a wonderful person. I don’t really ever comment on these videos but I felt like I needed to on this video. ❤️🙏
Give yourself Grace! I am crying with you for your deep loss of family, but sometimes you have to love family from a distance, and it sounds like you have done that well. You have a kind heart and sweet spirit that will continue to serve you well in life!
I love that you are being so open with us. When raised badly we need to break the mold. We are all created with our own will, and you have proved that molds can be changed. You created your own, and your beautiful family is proof.😊
Thank you for sharing ❤ I'm sorry to say but I can relate. My heart goes out to you. Big hugs Ashley ❤️❤️
You are so amazing and brave for what you've done. My sisters and I are dealing with non participating parents. I am now at peace with all I have been thru. I believe that God doesn't give u more than u can handle. Stay strong and keep moving forward... MUCH LOVE!!!
Same thing happened to me in 2008….the way I found out no one would believe it was definitely God and my angels way of protecting me. Just know it’s ok to grief the way you can and good to let go any hard feelings. Hopefully your father was sorry in the end.❤
Ashley your story made me realise I'm not alone with the same struggle. My father now 81, was abusive towards my mother and myself. After they split he left me behind, but took my younger brother for weekends, holidays etc. Then over the years he remarried (I wasn't told for 6 months) had another child ( I again wasn't told) ,but not once did he contact me. Out of the blue he rang about 15 years later and told me I was always his little girl 😢, then nothing again for years. He's missed out on my sons lives. I realised he's a lost cause. I've deleted him from my life but I still love him, he's my dad. I totally understand where your coming from. I dread the day my father leaves this earth. Thank you for telling us your story ❤❤❤
I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. ❤ You're awesome for keeping it real! Prayers for you and your family! 🙏❤️
Ashley, You have such a sweet and gentle soul. I so appreciate you for using this platform for good. What you just did here was so difficult and as a viewer, a mom and a woman, I applaud you. This is so, so healing. You showed us a raw vulnerable side of yourself and it has helped so many others. Reading through the comments I also see that we all have gone through issues with our parents and versions of estrangement. Your experience is your own and I just want to add how much I love hearing you say such beautiful and loving things about T.J.! You appear to have such love and a great relationship. At this time that is so important. Lean into him and into your faith (footprint in sand comes to mind). You are beautiful. You are loved. You are worthy. Hugs
I'm sorry for you loss and I can relate, I havent seen my dad in 25 yrs, he wasnt always nice to me and my mom. Sometimes you can wish someone well but cant be together. You are doing the best you can, that's all we can do, boundaries are sometimes needed. Concentrate on you and your beautiful family. Best wishes.
You’re beautiful inside and out! Your gentle and loving relationships with your children are a testament to your commitment to build a better future for yourself and for them. ❤
Ashley you are stepping into your own. You have faith and it will help you in healing. You have an awesome husband and three great kids. I will keep praying for you that you will find peace and all the joy God has to offer.
Wow! I just found your second channel and all I can is wow! I have learned so much from you on your selling channel and now it's so refreshing to see someone who isn't afraid to be vulnerable if it helps someone else. I too lost my dad 6 years ago. He left our family when I was 4 and my brother was 6 (I'm now 61!) Although he lived in the same city we only saw him on Christmas Eve. It took me many years to not take it personally. Once I became an adult with problems of my own I realized he "did the best he could" in the time and space he was in. I chose to forgive and move on with a relationship with him. I love how you said you believe now that your dad is healing. I believe that too. I think when we get to the other side we'll get the opportunity to review our lives and our eyes will be opened to any hurt we may have caused to people we love. Then we'll be able to forgive OURSELVES for our imperfections and prepare for our heavenly reunion one day. My heart goes out to you and I feel your pain, yet, I also sense your strength and determination to live peacefully and change the trajectory of your children's lives by acknowledging your pain and using it to set a better example for them. God bless you and your sweet family! Thank you for your videos! You are one amazing woman!
Gal I'm so sorry all this has happen to you. You don't forget but you can forgive in your heart. You don't forget you just put it all on a shelf. You just give all that love to your two beautiful boys and that wonderful husband. Do for them what was not done for you. Stay postive and stay strong.😅🎉❤
Ashley, keeping your family safe was the best decision you could make. Sometimes we have to cut ties with family, even though they are blood. Toxic is toxic, no matter how close they were at one time. Prayers for your healing!❤
Amen my sweet friend 🙏🏽
I understand. I am a caregiver to my 87 year old mom who doesn’t like me because I am a product of her first marriage. But I am called to still take care of her. I too know my Heavenly Father is here with me as he is with you. Love your family 🥰
You’re a rock star Ashley. You’re just so chill being u drinking ur cokes lol and your family is adorable. I always get excited to see your thrifting videos pop up. You’ve grown your channel and business beautifully. I’m proud of u giiiiirl lol We’re all just out here doing the best we can with the cards we are dealt. But very happy you love your life with TJ and the kids. God bless 😘❤️ … Sorry for the loss, completely understand mourning the idea of the parents you wish you had
I so super love that you made this channel. I will be following both. I have said it before and I’ll say it again you are the reason I became a reseller and the reason I get to be home with my littles 🫶🏼
I also seen a video that you did with your husband and y’all were managers in Oakland ca. I’m from Oakland ca. both my parents passed when I was 10 and 11 from drugs and alcohol so I feel ya on the passing. I love them but also resent them for the way they raised us for the short time they did. I to was a resident manager in Santa Rosa ca for 13 years to many 😂 takes a whole bunch of patience for that job doesn’t it?
Anyhow girl I love your videos. Love seeing you interact with your family it’s very joyful and you can see so much love. Sending big hugs to you 🫶🏼
Have also had a pretty similar experience. It has helped me listen to your story and the other stories in the comments. Thank you for that. Stay strong and hug that beautiful family of yours for all of us.
You’re so brave to be vulnerable. I can relate with you.
I’m praying for you and your sweet family! You’re Awesome Ashley! ♥️♥️♥️
This was just what I needed today…thank you.
You are not cringey whatsoever! I am praying for you too and I thoroughly enjoy your channel and all your experiences you share. I have learned A LOT from you and know I will continue to. Yes, YOUR DAD IS PROUD OF YOU!❤
Sending you a big hug for being so real and vulnerable! I too had some challenges growing up, so this video brought back a flood of emotion. Thanks for sharing. You are an amazing spirit!
Sending my sincere condolences. I enjoy watching your content. Praying for you and your family.
Talking about what happened is good for you ,you are amazing young lady. Amazing mum and wife ,sadly your dad missed out on a wonderful human being and still after all that’s happened you are giving him praise , broke my heart listening to you stay strong young lady
Thank you for your honesty. Much love to you and your family ❤
Oh Ashley we all have a story. Thanks for sharing yours. Blessings to you and you wonderful family. I am a grandma and have seen lots of life. I am so blessed. Been a widow for 22 years and that is another lifetime, so long ago. You always inspire me with your videos and teaching. So look forward to viewing them. Always looking to see if you have a new one out. At my age you miss those that are gone. 2 days ago was blessed with a new friend that I can do things with. Huge as this point when many have issues and cannot do things. Praying for you and your family. You are so special in so many ways. Blessings.
The most beautiful thing about a tragic story is when the person like you Ashley has been saved, rescue and brought into the promise by Jesus Christ. My husband has a very similar story as yours, all his life he grew up between strangers, drugs, abuse, abusers, violence and at the last minute of his dad's life he was only 34 years old when he was dying in the hospital my husband just a teen went after hesitation from all the pain his father caused him, but every story is different, his father in such a bizarre way he probably knew his time was coming up and knowing about Jesus when he was much younger, he asked for forgiveness, and asked my husband to keep God near and get near him. To my husband those were words of no means because his father never showed him God's love or his as a father, but many years later when he had an encounter with Jesus he then remembered his father's last words and it made sense, God was always there even in the middle of the dark stormy days, He was the one keeping him alive. And now he is the father to my children and he is nothing like his dad even with his own struggles of emotions some days is hard but I remind him, who he is now, who is his father, and that his own father is very proud of the men if God he has become ❤
Ashley, The one thing I want "You" to take from this video is what you said. "You" have the power to change the cycle of how you were raised and, from what I see you are doing just that. Be proud, you are a wonderful mom and have a great husband to change that cycle.
I’m so sorry to hear that. I’ll support you 100% from abroad🇯🇵
Your Heavenly Father will NEVER LEAVE YOU NOR FORSAKE YOU! Thank you for sharing this
I’m so sorry Ashley. I pray that you feel God’s loving arms around you right this very moment!🙏
Thanks for being real ❤ Love & Prayers from Jennifer in New Brunswick Canada 😊
You are such a beautiful person. ❤️
Sorry for your losses - stay strong and allow things to heal as you need. Stay safe and strong.
Ashley my Thoughts & Prayers are with you during this hard time. You have a Beautiful Family that's fills your hearts with love & happiness! I'm so Proud of you, to see how much you have accomplished so young You & TJ work so hard with such dedication & a wonderful work ethic. I agree that one day you will see your father again & he will see you for his first time as the wonderfully amazing person you are!❣
Proud of you, Ashley!!! You have broken the cycle and you should be so incredibly proud! Keep up the good work, we are cheering for you!