Burned Out By Your Dream Job? Never Had A Bf/Gf? Ask Aunty Lucy | Lucy Moon
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- Опубликовано: 7 июл 2024
- Today, we are doing an Ask Aunty Lucy video, offering advice and helping to solve your dilemmas. Your dream job has led to burnout? Still single at 21? Struggling with the expectations of others? I'm here to help!
Stay curious.
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I was talking to someone a few months ago about a potential new job and she said “work-life balance here is great. Your job isn’t everything” and it actually made me panic. Physically panic. This sickening, sinking feeling. Because that forced me to face the whatever “life” is meant to be if it’s not work. It forced me to start to come to terms with the fact that my work hadn’t been all consuming because it had to be, but because I made it all consuming, because that was easier than dealing with everything else. With how lonely I actually felt. Actually feel.
I've been with my boyfriend since we were 17. We're almost 23 now. From ages 19 to 21, we were fighting every single day. I can't even remember why. It was the most draining thing I've ever experienced. But we kept hanging on because we knew we would work it out. Then, suddenly... we grew up. We got our shit together and communicated and stopped fighting, and I could swear we're now the happiest couple on Earth. But, for a while, it f*cking sucked. Growing up together was hard. It included college, first jobs, awkward sex, burnout, a long distance patch, jealousy and working through childhood trauma. I would do it all over again, but dating before you and your partner have figured yourselves out is extremely hard. Definitely much harder than movies and social media would lead you to believe.
I needed this right now. Especially the part about not everyone "needing" a dream job to be fulfilled. Shoutout to Rowan!
The dream job stuff is really interesting - it's so tough to be like "oh, child me was kinda wrong about both this industry, and also who I have become." Right now I'm realizing that I enjoy the "boring" bit of my job a lot more than some of the more "exciting" bits, and that's weird when I try to imagine my future.
turned 22 last week and also single. i love being on my own and it didn't use to bother me, but now it does. i feel left out, like there's something wrong with me for not being able to get in a relationship☹
Loved the video, a relationship therapist once said most quarrels are caused by one or both partners feeling like they're going to lose the other person. You feel sad because your partner didn't want to take a look at something you made? Deep down you're probably afraid they don't like you anymore even if it's a small thing and it's irrational
Absolutely adore this- as somebody hitting her early 20s, having never had an older sister, content like this is always so comforting for me.
I hope to see more of these videos from you, Lucy, I think it could be a really endearing series, and a way to approach more “serious”/mature topics that go beyond consumerism, sustainability, and fashion- hopefully it’s an avenue for you to feel less “stuck” in a box for themes & topics if you ever want to branch out.
Have a lovely Sunday. I hope you & everybody else in these comments is well🤍
cheers to hitting early twenties! in the same boat xx
RE dream job question: As someone who used to work in the film industry, i can say with soooo much clarity that leaving the industry did wonders for my mental health. I now no longer fear my phone going off with an unknown number. I am not as tired as I used to be. I'm so glad I got to do everything I did in the industry but the best thing I ever did was leave. I now have my actual dream job! I work in social media/content creation for an editing company and LOVE IT! It doesnt feel like work. Also if you're already questioning leaving the industry, I think you already know what you want to do. Hope this helps x
I had a similar conversation about working earlier today actually! It took me a really long time to learn that my job doesn't define me. I like my job and the people I work with and supplies me with good health benefits. But the people and hobbies I have outside of work are what fulfills me.
I really really needed to hear these bits of advice today. Thank you so much for giving your insight to these questions that I think many of us can relate to!!
ok, sensible jobs and dream jobs. So much to say here but basically what you do at work doesn't matter nearly as much as we're led to believe. If you have a monetizable passion, great, but in reality most of us don't either because being hobby good at smthng != being pro good at it, or we simply don't have a thing at all. I'm super into bouldering, swimming, red dead redemption 2, my cat, and my partner. I'm happy to have a job that pays enough so I'm able to devote my free time to the things I love, and can do it in an atmosphere of pure enjoyment without any pressure that this really needs to work out. Important job things are 1. do you get paid well, 2. do you get treated decently, 3. do you tolerate your day to day and are there some things you genuinely like, 4. do you see a future for yourself that looks good 5. is your mental health ok re: work. Beyond that I say invest in your personal life because that will always be with you. A job is a job.
I've been following your channel for ages and I really liked this video! I'd love to see more of 'Ask Aunty Lucy' as a series!
You have always had such a natural connection with the camera, I feel like you are right in my room having sister talks! 💕 so helpful and honest!
just wanted to echo a few other comments and say thank you for your advice/words of wisdom re age and relationships. I'm 21 and have just moved abroad after graduating from uni, where there was so much pressure to engage with hookup culture etc. I found that no matter how hard I forced myself to get involved (mainly due to external pressures) it just wasn't personally for me - and led to some really negative experiences. Now that I'm somewhere completely removed from that life, and meeting lots of new people, I've noticed a real sense of internalised shame about how little experience I have relationships-wise. I feel like people just assume that as a fairly outgoing uni grad who has recently moved abroad alone I wouldn't struggle with that kind of thing and so it has started to feel a bit like i'm keeping a dirty secret lol. Hearing you say how strange it is that people assume teenagers&people in their early twenties should all be in relationships was truly a breath of fresh air and made me feel so much calmer about it all - thank you!! X
Loved this, so calming and reassuring 😌
Such good advice :)
Regarding the job choice:
Most general fields of jobs (film industry, agriculture etc.) have a great variety of specific jobs and in that, things you might do on the day to day. Especially when you are young, you are only just finding out, if you enjoy talking to people all day, if calling people stresses you out, if you are a natural at planning things. When you realize these things about yourself you can adjust accordingly.
This is of course only if you have the privilege of choice.
so good at giving advice! this was great
My favourite videos of yours are your more relaxed ones. Keep it up!
these were so well thought out
Just watching some of your older videos that I haven't had the chance to see yet and I love this style of video! You give such eloquent and sensible advice and I would love to see more of these types of videos. Also, if you felt comfortable with it, I would love to hear you talk more about self improvement and how you deal with some of the challenges that come with being a human!
I absolutely love Aunty Lucy videos😌🥰✨
Sooo, I started dating at Uni which is late teens, however, the relationships never lasted long. I was so happy single. Then, at the age of 27, yes 27, I decided to start dating seriously, I was very pick however, I met my bf online and I knew that he was/is the one for me. We are both mature and we both know what we want.
Loved this one a lot! Thank you!
I absolutely loveeee these types of videos 💕
I've loved all your videos, seen for the first time today. Your advice is so wise and mature. Unlike any coach, therapist or anyone else in real life or online. I like how you reach within yourself and speak from your experience. It's not just repeating psychological theories as therapists do. Perhaps being your own boss enables you to be authentic. Whereas working for a corporate means you can sell your soul to the devil, and self edit inorder to fit in with the prevailing culture.
I love this!!! Thanks a lot
Thank you, Lucy ❤
These are soooo cute 💗💗💗
you are such a lovely person 💞
i love the way you smile
Love this!! The only thing.. the video cover has a Q from a follower who wanted to be anon, and her photo is shown! 😬
regarding jobs: Is it really YOUR dream job or is it your fantasy self dream job? I am stuck in the job that I thought I have to aspire to, my fantasy-self-persona always wanted to do this and it does not align at all with my talents, interests or just plain things that make me happy
New subscriber here, and I have to say, you are lovely ❤️
I’m 27 and never been with a guy. I started using dating apps but find it a bit exhausting and generally scared to meet guys in person. I find it hard to be attracted to a picture. I know I a guy who I’m attracted to. I haven’t spoke to him much so I don’t know if it’s gonna go anywhere. I enjoy talking to him because I fancy him. If he liked me back maybe he’d have shown it, or do I need to show him I’m interested? How do I show him without being creepy or making it weird. Should I try to spend more time with him before I try to flirt? I’m worried It’s just based on lust and those feelings disappear when I get to know him better
I don't know if you're looking for advice or just sharing, but as someone who's in a similar position (27, haven't dated since high school, can't stand the apps) I say go for it! It's so exciting that you've met someone organically (not on the apps) who you're attracted to! If I were you I'd approach him saying something like, "hey, you seem really cool, I'd love to get to know you better, do you want to get coffee/lunch/a drink sometime?" (If you have any mutual interests you can also structure the invitation around that!) Even if it's not a mutual attraction connection you might make a new friend or maybe nothing happens, but all in all it's pretty low risk! As long as you respect his response I don't think it's creepy to express interest. Good luck!
"Relationships and situationships" lol
Yep, still in lockdown. Hopefully due to get out in Nov or Dec though!
"If your dream job is destroying you, that's a nightmare job."
Fuck. You're so wise.
Desperado Red, specifically lol. no clue why i can never find them
As someone who is just hitting thirty I have to say...I have thought to myself numerous times in the past two years I would have been much better off if I had been wearing eye cream in my mid twenties consistently and not just getting a good one now! Everyone's eyes concerns are different and a lot of eye creams are just overpriced moisturizers but I would still tell my mid 20 friends to wear eye cream because who knows when you're thirty you might feel differently!
post more like this plz
more of deez lucy pls! love the advice ting
why did the one about eye cream catch me so off guard LMAOOO
My partners (then 29) relative (About 70) started to talk about importance of quickly getting studies done and pursuing the one long career. (As if that was so easy. Especially, since he has depression.)
Luckily our generation has not such false belief. You can change careers as many times as you want. What ever makes you happy. I'm proud that my mum who decided to go to get new education and graduated when she was about to turn 57. And I told this to the relative!
2am to 10am but un-ironically and it’s actually 3 till 11
Hello lucy moon and how your day going and have you thought about live streaming on twitch and starting your own podcasts and starting your own vlog channel on youtube and starting your own tiktok account and starting your own discord account and starting your own patreon account or onlyfans account in the future