At 41 years old I’m “tapping out.” Recently dumped by ex fiancé for his “side.” I’m super loyal, modest, classy, no vices, independent and domesticated. It’s never enough for men. There’s so many beautiful, exceptional women that are being mistreated! It’s so disheartening.
I am also 41 and was dumped by my long term boyfriend who became my husband. Long story but the pain is traumatizing. When I heard him say "I just don't feel the same anymore".... my heart shattered because I NEVER would have expected our bond to be broken. I'm tired of this happening to me 3 times in a row by 3 different men that I loved with all my heart who came in - and then out - of my life. I'm tapping out too. Men are never satisfied. There is NO good reason for so many beautiful, kind hearted, exceptional women to keep on being mistreated and abused over and over again. I'm sick of hearing "noT aLL mEn!"... the VAST MAJORITY of men do this SO the majority rules. It's too many women with the same heartbreaking stories. We deserve better, but we will never get to experience it. That means we are just better off staying single and celibate. I'm choosing that. I don't want to be discarded like this by a man with whom we shared such a deep emotional bond, deep love with and for many years only to have it come to and end all over again. I just can't do it anymore.
looks are very important to a man and as women age many struggle to transition from the dynamic of them having the final say to the man having the final say as the SMP value has transferred from the women to the man over the decades and too often the women can't humble themselves to adjust the arrangement
@@tormmac Looks are important to a degree because I can look like a Victoria’s Secret model and I still got dumped. I’ve been a model and professional dancer for most of my life. I’m telling you, you men don’t care that much about looks as much as you think. You are wired for infidelity and variety. That’s why we as women don’t want to deal with you anymore. Looks aren’t ever going to keep a man. Besides, it’s the MAN who should be trying to keep that lady.
I think if you’re with a gaslighter, and you’re pretty certain something is up, snooping would be the better option than asking directly if he’s cheating. Because he’s just going to make you feel crazy even if he is cheating.
Currently trying to file for divorce because I finally decided to quit ignoring the red flags and snoop 😢😢 I had feelings I kept ignoring but I flat out asked and he denied so I tried to let it go but once he shaved his pubic area for the first time in 11 years and told me he did it for me and he knew I was on my cycle so I wouldn't be able to do anything until it ended that's when I knew he was cheating. Picked up his phone one night and he's talking to 14 women including several exes and 2 baby mamas and majority of them don't know he's married with kids. And there's a few who knows he's with me but still meeting up with him 😤😤 SMH 🙄 I can't wait to be done, putting my health at risk for nothing but constantly making sure I'm not cheating though 😂
Love is so exhausting. So many weirdos; so many different motives behind people; so many head games; so many broken, damaged people; so many people with their heads in their phones 🤦🏽♀️ being single is not bad at all
It’s crazy that spending nights alone is way healthier than spending your days with the typical person nowadays 🥺🥺 but if that’s what it has to be , I guess that’s just what I have to do
When you said, “some of us needed to be cheated on, or we would have never left” mmm I felt that! It’s true, I would have never walked away. After healing and self evaluating I know now, he wasn’t the one for me.
Nah. “You needed to get cheated on” theory isn’t it. Cause you can literally apply that theory to every single horrible thing out there to justify some shitty ass behavior [from pedos to the DV to sexual assault or worse]. No one deserves to go through shit or eat shit to learn from shit. So… I am not taking on that mindset anymore. As a grown ass female, it’s not my responsibility to keep an eye on a grown ass man. To teach him shit that his elders failed or to figure out if what’s coming outta his mouth is true or not. I don’t want to nor do I have time for it. So, if I end up dating anyone in the future [single life is peaceful]… if he can’t keep it a 💯, he don’t need to be around me [or vice versa]. Simple really. Nothing more. Nothing less. 🤷🏼♀️ Be blessed everyone. 🙏🏼
This is the correct mindset. I feel the same as you! It also makes me baffled as to how they always complain that we women are the complicated ones. SMH, sorry but NO fucking way. Men are the most complicated creatures on planet earth.@@UnaBellissima
I really hate when someone says "all men cheat" because it is simply unfair 😢My ex kept saying that and it was so hurtfull... Yes, I had some female friends and I had an opportunity but I never did that. I take my honour and dignity from living according to my values. I remain faithfull for myself and for my pride as a man. In some case I had to end the relationship but I never cheated. Unfortunately most women don't even want to hear such statement 😢
You have to realize men have traumatized women to the point women have zero faith in your gender. Blame other men for women's distrust of you. It is still happening and more than ever. The only difference is women are doing it as well and are no longer being brutalized for it while having to watch men get away with the same behavior. That's where it starts. When we think a guy is faithful, he pulls the rug from under us. We eventually learn to stop hoping for a faithful man by watching our mothers, aunts and sisters and daughters be wronged by men. How long do you want women to hold out when we are constantly reminded of how fickle men can be when they have a functioning penis? Are you saying there is zero reason for women of today to be skeptical of men being faithful when history is a strong predictor of future bahavior? Men just want women to conveniently forget how women of the past were treated. I'm sure if some men who don't want to do the work of establishing trust had their way, they'd just wipe the memories clean of newer generations of women like a robot as we become datable just to have an advantage. But that's impossible. It's ingrained in human dna to learn from situations that happen to others and avoid dangers. You're asking women to go against basic human nature because it makes it easier for you to keep a woman.
I'm a woman and hate when women say " all men cheat". They don't know all men in the world. Maybe the ones they met cheated. I've never cheated in any of my relationships, but got cheated on several times. I don't understand why some men and women don't appreciate the person that's good to them. Smh. A lot men and women seem to treat the good person like shit. They don't realize what they had until it's gone. Why is that? I have exes from years ago reaching out to me. Now, I'm in a new relationship but we have our ups and downs. We don't get a chance to spend a lot of time with each other, because of our financial circumstances. He's an hour away from me. I got laid off from my job, and he got hit my a flat bed truck while he was working delivering packaging. He had surgery on his knee and going through physical therapy. Therefore, he have been out of work for a while until doctor release him to go back to work. Sometimes he be in pain and don't want to be bothered. I have traveled to go see him but lately we haven't been seeings very challenging for the both of us. Sometimes I feel like giving up on this relationship, but he always tell me and show me he really care for me. If it's meant to be it will be. If not, then I'm good. It will hurt me because my heart is with him. But, life goes on.
I find it so funny that women are really asking the question "Can a man cheat on me and still love me?" Like, what? What difference does it make either way? He still cheated on you. Take your self respect and walk away.
omg, the phone behavior definitely lets you know they are cheating when you are trying to call them too, when your call is answered all the time and it suddenly stops getting answered or returned, and you reside with one another thats a serious red flag. Especially if they send a text instead of calling you lol.
@@1blkbeauty79 yep and dont look back either, they do not deserve a good woman. Its plenty of Kings out here just waiting for those boys to mess up so they can show us women how we are suppose to be treated as Queens CORRECTLY......, I now have that KING who loves me the right way and shows me and reassures me in every way possible that IM HIS QUEEN. Leave him in the dust girl
Thanks, I went through it. All signs were there, I ignored, he gaslighted. However now I'm so thankful for it. I am out of a long abusive relationship, but probably will stay if he didn't cheat. I'm now at peace and joy, closer to God. Love and light for everyone that is in this situation.
Exactly! We overlook the signs, somehow in denial of how someone can hurt us in such a way when we truly love. When we finally value our worth and what we bring to the table, that's when you get the ugly truth and have to forgive ourselves for what we tried to push under the rug. Thank you Stephan for you knowledge🙏🏻
I've been cheated many times. I remember, it was not a good feeling to be in NEVER. The hardest is when you start thinking "What Im gonna do now", and the pressure against yourself you will start feeling but it feels good to walk away though it hurts. At some point, I began to have trust issues but I worked on myself. Because of my experience, I learned to discern how men can manipulate you just to get you. They know their words so well but you know when it's just words. Don't fall for sweet words.
If my future husband ever cheated, I would divorce him immediately and never give him a second chance. Stephan, I respectfully disagree with you when you say a man will cheat on his wife although he loves her. In my mind, cheaters do not love their spouse. When someone truly loves their spouse, they work out the issue(s) with their spouse, but they never cheat. True love means intentionally avoiding hurting your spouse.
I completely agree with you! LOVE IS RESPECT! he had the choice not to cheat but he decided to do it anyways! if their impulse are greater than his love and respect for you, than he does not love you enough!
You'll never hear a man say the same. They immediately won't believe you love them if you cheat. Women need to have the same mindset, we are too forgiving. You'll hear very few men advocate for staying with a cheating woman. Not unless he can gain financially, but his resentment will surface in his actions. He will still plan on leaving once the benefit is over. He will be hurt and leave. Women need to have the same standards men have. They often leave at the first sign of discomfort, distrust or resistance.
I finally realized this. My gut was telling me he was lying. He had another woman the whole time even had her in the bed we sleep in smfh. I am beautiful, smart, and know how to treat my man his loss. At 46 I'm done dating they can have these damn weirdos😂😂
Cheating is a choice. You can give a person everything they say they want and need and do all the things you found in his search history and they will still cheat if they want to.
I feel like in this stage that our current society is in people should just expect to be cheated on and hope for the best. Sad but true! Social media, phones, dating apps, etc have ruined the way relationships are viewed. There is no value in it anymore…
I thank God I have all of these. I've truly found my person when I was just minding my business being happy, healed and single. Now I'm happy, healed and coupled!
So, I had to stay until I knew he was cheating because we were married and I could not be remarried until it was confirmed. However, it is true. I needed to be cheated on and for him to be caught to let go and stop trying.
All of these pointS are absolutely true . I was just cheated by my boyfriend. I should've listened to my intuition However i didn't instead i was questioning myself like am i being insecure or don't trust him! But All this time my intuition was true. He was cheating on me. 😔 Im so hurt its been a month yet i still cant forget him. I have forgiven him but not forgotten. I still do miss him.
So sorry to hear that love. Yea it sucks NOW but I promise you one day soon you will come back to this comment with literally no more feelings this guy. I promise you will get over it. This is apart of the process 💪🏽🙏🏽 Don’t hit him up, no matter how much you miss him. You will regret it later. Crying actually helps too so cry if you have to …
I agree with you on the phone. My ex fiance showed all those signs. It was very apparent that he was hiding or doing something that he knew was inappropriate.
All men do not cheat, my husband is an example of it, I trust him a lot, all begin with his behavior, he does not hide anything, he is at home most of the time, he wants to go out with me always, he ask me to answer his phone, he has all his device sync, i am a believer that there are more men that do not cheat than we think! Because I have seen it!
A MAN CAN BE MARRIED FOR 22 YEARS AND CHEAT FOR 24 LOL MAYBE HE JUST DOES NOT LET YOU FEEL IT OR YOU TRAINED HIM THAT WAY OR YOU FRONTIN ON HERE💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯
I agree to the "some of us needed to be cheated on". I have a best friend who stayed in toxic relationships for too long even though she knew her ex bf was cheating with other girl. This girl was taunting my friend by sending pics and texts, but my friend would still be communicating and helping her loser ex. In the end the guy decided to marry the other girl 🤦♀️
I remember I was 24 and my bf at the time said if I hooked up with my previous ex before him he would forgive me because he knew that my ex treated me excellent and that I may still harbor feelings for him. I left the very next day this was in spring of that year. Come to find out HIS ex was coming home for summer and he wanted to hook up with her. He was so furious with me with tears in his eyes saying oh what did he do wrong. Ninja you ain’t did anything wrong but you were certainly plotting. His ex and I were colleagues as we were in the same band for carnival and his name came up when she was speaking about who her summer fling was and it clicked in my head ohhhhh this is why he said what he said. I never went back to him and never addressed it with her I just silently said I knew it! They were speaking since Valentine’s Day planning to hook up once she touch down for summer. So there was an overlap.
Entering into a relationship in today's world it's like Persueing a MASTERS DEGREE ? EYES EARS All five senses have to be top notch It's to much brain taxing for me Steph u made me laugh , cry , and breath a sigh of relief altogether One thing am SURE of We met cheating in this world And we will die and leave it here also Remedying this is left up to God Almighty
I'm on my marks getting set for this program..I need to help many of my fellow women who have toxic relationships .I will always spice it with the Good News of our Lord Yeshua .
He was asleep, and his phone fell off the nightstand and I picked it up to put it on the charger because I was getting out of bed to go to work, he woke up and reached for it immediately and I said,” what are you doing?” And he said “what?” Couldn’t that be a clear sign?
I found evidence where my ex told this lady he missed and loved her after I told him to leave and he still lied saying he never cheated for the record. Still toxic ASL. After the break up he lacks accountability and has issues I never paid attention to. I'm ready to move on and heal
I am dating a man who gets text messages from his ex. He says its nothing and she sends positive messages and she lives with her boyfriend. I think he is still emotionally attached to her and her boyfriend probably has no idea she is texting him..I'm thinking about moving on. We don't check each other's phone and I don't text men or have men friends..
Omg....I went thru that....plez believe its something still there.....cuz they are an EX for a reason.....I don't keep exes as friends.....thats dangerous.
@MeetStephanSpeaks So many of your talks have my eyes welling up. I'm learning lessons from you and when you talk, I am matching your lesson with my real-life experiences. These lessons are the ones I've failed to learn over and over...thank you, I appreciate you! 💗
I could never cheat on someone I love ... it's time to go when it gets to that. The person's not meeting your needs, then they're not the person for you, and you need to just move on and be honest and tell the other person this
A man I’m currently speaking with stated he pulled away from his wife (physically & emotionally) because she (for 6 yrs) made him the bad guy to HER kids. He said they would agree on rules for her teenage son & daughter. Then they would sit the kids down to communicate. He would set the rules but the wife NEVER spoke up or agreed with him in front of the kids. Therefore, their behavior never changed. He said he disconnected/pulled away from her, she eventually cheated and they divorced.
So true, I know I come from a whole different school, if I can't love, respect you, we need to part ways with, ease, grace, wish one another well, and keep it moving! Who does that, checking someone phone, that is how you know you are not mature enough to be in a relationship, who does that, many and sad! 😵😵😵😵😵😵People get the signs, don't be pay attention, I don't even deal with people that are not present, if they like the phone so much, go be with your phone and have a nice day! Get it 😜😜😜😜😜
ALL OF THIS! 👏👏👏 Besides, phones are personal to each one of us, so, checking someone's phone, in my opinion, is a violation of someone's privacy. I'd NEVER do it.
Also when grown-ass men are too close to their mother. They will cheat because Mamma will support their actions. They can move back in with her. Fact!!!
My ex was cheating because it lied about small things and always made excuses why he couldn’t be on the phone with me also I remember one night he lied to me saying he going to the airport to pick up my auntie but he was at home the whole time on the phone with another women . He always had an attitude with me and he stopped sharing his location then he used to gaslight me too .
I think you‘re right with the stuff your saying. It makes me so emotional because I‘ve known with my ex that something was up. He did almost all of the things you described. But I was really naive and never thought he‘d cheat. I was only 19 at the time. He gaslighted me so badly whenever I questioned him and I felt so bad to end it in case I was wrong and that I really was just confused and insecure. I didn‘t even think about him cheating I just thought that we were disconnected. But I tried reall hard to get him to open up to me but he wouldn‘t. Everytime I tried to leave him he wouldn‘t let me go and wouldn‘t give up or he‘d cry so much that I thought he must really love me. This experience has broken my trust deeply. I still don‘t get how we could be bestfriends and he‘d still betray me like that. His values otherwise aren‘t even in alignment with cheating so his behaviour really didn‘t make any sense to me still. I don‘t know how to feel. I feel confused and overwhelmed when I think about it even though we have broken up over a year ago. We were together for 5 years and I‘m 24 now. Even after we have reached rock bottom and there was nothing to hide anymore he‘d still tell me that he thought I‘d be his future wife. It hurt me deeply because I felt that he was my husband too but cheating goes against my values and my trust in him is not repairable. I‘m honestly happy single at the moment and feel a lot of peace. I love myself again. I was really angry with myself for being so weak and dumb and confused in the past. But I have forgiven myself. I just don‘t know if I‘m able to ever trust as deeply again. But after such a deep connection I long for a deep trust and friendship sometime in the future again, but I can‘t help but worrying that I‘ll put myself in a weak position if I choose to have a family with someone that‘ll cheat on me.
Oh my goodness, the last one was a whole wake up call! I never looked at our problems in a different way, but you just helped me to understand, and look at things from a whole different angle. THANK YOU! 🙏🏽 I love your books, and I love you. I love the way you explain “in detail” each topic. You give it to us cold, and that’s what us woman need! For real for real. I know I can be very hard to deal with, my poor husband, I’m not even sure how he’s stuck around for 25 years. Lord help me! 🙏🏽🫠
Thank you for speaking about sharing your world together! This is something I always felt in my ❤ that was important to me & I felt as though it's concerning when someone doesn't want to share, even to gain understanding of who the person is.
Thankyou for taking the time to post such a useful video. I found it to be useful in my situation and helps clarify a few of those iffey scenarios God Bless
Loved the episode so on point. For the ladies, another few ways to tell if your man has been cheating on you is if your PH level of your 👛 changes, if his sexual behavior changes, change in cologne like he way always using Hugo Sport and decide to start buying Versace when you know he can't even spell Versace, and if you dress up to go out and he starts to question you about where are you going dressed up yeah he cheating.
Ph level is a big indicator. Couldn’t figure out why ish was always going on down there. Thankfully nothing SERIOUS. Just yeast or BV. But still. So not only was my ex husband cheating, he wasn’t even wearing a condom. Thank God I found the strength to leave. Been fresh as a daisy ever since!!
@@tammiebellon1877 You have to go to the doctor. There is nothing over the counter. And I am not sure any of those homeopathic remedies would work. They might mask things, but not cure. The doctor will prescribe Flagyl. Or something similar, if you are allergic to Flagyl. It kills the bacteria, as it's an anti-bacterial medication. It's like a 7 day treatment of taking pills. Something like that. Maybe 5. By day 2, you are straight, but you must take the whole course of treatment. Hope that helps!! Us girls must stick together and share all kinds of information.
I'm currently pregnant, just found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me with multiple ladies, I broke up with him and to cut all ties, but now we have a baby on the way and must plan everything together, Doctors appointments, baby clothes etc. How do I go about with this??
You don’t have to plan anything together physically. He doesn’t have to be at the doctor appointments nor does he have to pick out baby clothes with you. What he does need to do is help you with the baby and anything the baby needs but you need to cut off physically being around him. Yes it is important to co parent but you are Not in a relationship any more and you need to fully comprehend that and start making boundaries
You are a fantastic speaker. I really appreciate and find interest in your advice even on the little sub points in each piece. Thank you for putting together such intelligent, wise and insightful information to help bring awareness to others. I respect how clear you make the point that you are not validating certain things and that just because particular signs are present, doesn’t always equal cheating. Some creators go so deep into their own opinions and beliefs, they do not share the other sides to things. They make it as though it is fact that one is unfaithful if they show particular signs for things as opposed to looking at multiple perspectives, right down to possible mental health struggles.
omggggg the gaslighting is soooo true i was called crazy when i bring up how he was moving as if he was cheating or it was another woman, and i was always called crazy, i need to chill out this and that, you assuming stuff this and that, but you not coming home so which is it dude. thats whats gonna make a woman crazy, when the signs are in her face but being told otherwise lol
i think that's a good prospective why are we fighting i ask myself this all the time i have been married for 10 years and out of nowhere 2 years ago m husband started starting fights out of no where for example he came home one day (i'm at stay at home mom) he did t even speak he went over to our windows and started shutting them (i had them raised because i had be reorganizing and deep cleaning allday he was so pissed off that i opened the windows he left for 5 days i didn't even get to say anything back he yelled for 10 mins calling me irresponsible because people could see inside our house (wtf type of logic is that) so to answer your question i did ask myself why are we fighting vs why is he cheating and to be honest i don't think anything was wrong i think he just wanted to leave without me being able to call and ask him for anything if we're getting alone then i should be able to call him but if he's mad over a fake arguement he can cheat in peace and block me
Does anyone know if Stephan has a video on Gaslighting? I am just learning in Therapy that I've been dealing with gaslighting for a couple years now with my ex partner and I am so tired of being confused and like I am not remembering things correctly. I finally started writing things down, called my ex out, and he said "we just see things differently". I have to co-parent with this man and I am so scared for this new journey and how to protect my mind.
Dang! You done got on TY and told my entire store for the last 20 plus years… the kids are grown now. Love has been a battlefield, and the kids were caught in the crossfire. I rose my white flag. Uncle, uncle! I tap out!!!
Am I tripping? On 2 occasions, I have been accused of going through his phone. On the Most High, I did not do what I was accused of twice. Both times, the convo got so heated because I refused to say I did, what I know I didn't. In both situations, it ended up with him drawing his fist back at me. His phone is ALWAYS face down. Now I'm not slow, insecure, paranoid, crazy, or plain stupid. When a man goes to the extreme that he will draw his fist back as if he wants to hit you, something is horribly wrong. It's not open handed, which is bad, too. But a closed fist. The deepest part is, when you feel cautious of Him after these actions, he says, "You hold grudges." Men, women don't forget what deeply hurts them. Per DJ, LOVE DOES NOT DAMAGE. Anywho.
A professional cheater knows what to do, how to do it and when as well as where. They are slick and they are able to deceive easily, especially if he's disrespectful and able to lie so easily, then want affection or to be sexual but not give in many other areas, in which feeds into a woman in honestly loving her and feeding into her. It's not going to happen. They want you to give to them while they take from you and will you use you and keep you because you're good to them, while they'll be awful to you! Drain you off all you have within and leave you in that state unless you see your worth!!! Give to yourself ladies!!! Love yourself more! It's a sad deal when you fall into this trap! 7 years of the same repetition. Almost killed me on every level. Until i woke up and pulled back and stopped being sexual because of the abuse. I can't give myself to someone who doesn't see my value! Let alone not able to trust when they've proved who they are!!!
So much information , information that I needed to hear . Many questions in my mind that you’ve answered in the blog and I’m glad I watch your channel . I’ve subscribed so hear from you more .
The biggest sign you didn’t mention is. Not necessarily 1 sign here 1 sign there it’s a convergence of multiple signs. Another sign is treating you with distain. It’s used as a justification to cheat.
What is wrong with someone….when you know there is cheating but can’t leave? How does a person get help for this? If already done many counseling sessions for the years and years of the relationship. 😢
When a man says “all men cheat” definitely going to do it! 😮 this happened to me. Phone games too, my ex was acting weird when I discovered he was cheating. He took into the bathroom all the sudden! All the time when he would be on the phone all that much. Then all the he was having an affair.
If my husband did that to me it would break my heart in a thousand pieces and I could never accept him again, no matter if he still love me. To me, his love would not matter anymore.
Trust yourself and investigate. Or are you around other women who are being cheated on that triggers this feeling? If there are no external factors making you think this, then something isn't right with the relationship internally. Women have a stronger connection to our intuition for a reason. We are weaker and cannot risk getting into a situation we can't get out of physically. It's ingrained in our DNA for us to survive based on intuition while men have physical strength, they can remove themselves from dangerous situations once it starts, we cannot so easily. Just watch him and observe, men always reveal themselves. If he isn't, then he has no reason to worry.
Sign #1: He's converting oxygen into carbon dioxide. Sign #2: His mouth is moving and sound is coming out of it. Sign #3: The water he drank happened to be wet that day. Sign #4: His shirt fell on the floor when he took it off due to the value of gravity on Earth being 9.80665 m/s^2. Sign #5: It's a day of the week that ends in 'y.'
Too caught up in trying to prove he's cheating instead of accepting the fact the behavior is disrespectful, deceitful and consistent after many conversations. There has been temporary change over 2yrs. He defaults right back to his original setting...I needed to hear that...
The most painful 💔 experience . I discovered stephan speaks after my experience , I would have never made it😅, gaaaaad its terrible. As crazy as it may sound, I am glad he cheated it was necessary! I needed a push to leave his dysfunctional (love) for goooooood 😅 There's no honor no honor at all! Thank you Stephan
I go into relationship in trusting him till he gives me a reason. When thinks goes certain why with your relationship and all sudden call, texts and staying out plus secretive with his phone definitely sign of a cheating man
your opinion:I have smb since 4 months and he lives in another country (2h with plane) we meet once and was Magic.A nice guy with personality. After we sleeped together was same intensity and I got more feeling for him.We talk everyday for everything and when I talk about feelings he like to hear what i feel nd get nervous. Only when we habe a disscusion he express me his own feelings.we Planned a second date in another country there where both Our families lives(same nationality)I have a small baby and my sister with and we planned we stay 1 night Together and I ll Cook for him bologniese.He told me he ll Stay there 4 days cause his mother is alone.The night I was reserving the ticket plane for me my sis and my little baby he asked me if I was sure cause is along tripp for my little baby and me from the Airport to destination city(3h)and was better than he comes to meet me here where I live after this tripp is oder cause he is going to meet his mother.Our first date was about 2 months ago.I was so sad.I canceled it and he was so clingy telling me he has feelings.I am sure he is Meeting smb there but I can never prove it.what should I Do?
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Thank u
How can we just talk? I need some guidance with a cheating spouse, how can I pay for just your call services
No im fine I rather be alone all men are crazy and like to lie 😂😂😂😂
Thank you for making this amazing video. I appreciate you! 🌹🙏🏽🙋🏽♀
Cheating isn’t a mistake
It’s a choice 😒
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
That's what I'm saying... if a person cheats, it's because they choose to step out regardless if it hurts the person they claim to love.
Definitely a choice
Yup. And, I am choosing to become extremely friendly with that block button going forward in my life. 😂😂😂
@@UnaBellissima 😂😂😂
At 41 years old I’m “tapping out.”
Recently dumped by ex fiancé for his “side.”
I’m super loyal, modest, classy, no vices, independent and domesticated. It’s never enough for men. There’s so many beautiful, exceptional women that are being mistreated! It’s so disheartening.
I am also 41 and was dumped by my long term boyfriend who became my husband. Long story but the pain is traumatizing. When I heard him say "I just don't feel the same anymore".... my heart shattered because I NEVER would have expected our bond to be broken. I'm tired of this happening to me 3 times in a row by 3 different men that I loved with all my heart who came in - and then out - of my life. I'm tapping out too. Men are never satisfied. There is NO good reason for so many beautiful, kind hearted, exceptional women to keep on being mistreated and abused over and over again. I'm sick of hearing "noT aLL mEn!"... the VAST MAJORITY of men do this SO the majority rules. It's too many women with the same heartbreaking stories. We deserve better, but we will never get to experience it. That means we are just better off staying single and celibate. I'm choosing that. I don't want to be discarded like this by a man with whom we shared such a deep emotional bond, deep love with and for many years only to have it come to and end all over again. I just can't do it anymore.
looks are very important to a man and as women age many struggle to transition from the dynamic of them having the final say to the man having the final say as the SMP value has transferred from the women to the man over the decades and too often the women can't humble themselves to adjust the arrangement
@@tormmac Looks are important to a degree because I can look like a Victoria’s Secret model and I still got dumped. I’ve been a model and professional dancer for most of my life. I’m telling you, you men don’t care that much about looks as much as you think. You are wired for infidelity and variety. That’s why we as women don’t want to deal with you anymore. Looks aren’t ever going to keep a man. Besides, it’s the MAN who should be trying to keep that lady.
@@irinaivanovic9792 id change your mind irl bebe 🤭
@@irinaivanovic9792AMEN AND AMEN AND AMEN!!!
I think if you’re with a gaslighter, and you’re pretty certain something is up, snooping would be the better option than asking directly if he’s cheating. Because he’s just going to make you feel crazy even if he is cheating.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback 🙏
Currently trying to file for divorce because I finally decided to quit ignoring the red flags and snoop 😢😢 I had feelings I kept ignoring but I flat out asked and he denied so I tried to let it go but once he shaved his pubic area for the first time in 11 years and told me he did it for me and he knew I was on my cycle so I wouldn't be able to do anything until it ended that's when I knew he was cheating. Picked up his phone one night and he's talking to 14 women including several exes and 2 baby mamas and majority of them don't know he's married with kids. And there's a few who knows he's with me but still meeting up with him 😤😤 SMH 🙄 I can't wait to be done, putting my health at risk for nothing but constantly making sure I'm not cheating though 😂
Ahaha...say that shit LOUDER!!
Love is so exhausting. So many weirdos; so many different motives behind people; so many head games; so many broken, damaged people; so many people with their heads in their phones 🤦🏽♀️ being single is not bad at all
It definitely isn't an easy situation, but the focus needs to be on doing what is truly best 🙏
I thought it was just me feeling this way 😩🥴🥴 it's very exhausting, Jesus.
It’s crazy that spending nights alone is way healthier than spending your days with the typical person nowadays 🥺🥺 but if that’s what it has to be , I guess that’s just what I have to do
Yup . I m single now dnt have energy for dating . I wana money to support myself n that is it
@@_espresso_654Words of the wise👌
Not worth to be in a relationship nowdays anymore. Thx to social media..
When you said, “some of us needed to be cheated on, or we would have never left” mmm I felt that! It’s true, I would have never walked away. After healing and self evaluating I know now, he wasn’t the one for me.
Thank you for sharing your experience! Hopefully, it will help others learn from it. I appreciate that 🙏
Nah. “You needed to get cheated on” theory isn’t it. Cause you can literally apply that theory to every single horrible thing out there to justify some shitty ass behavior [from pedos to the DV to sexual assault or worse]. No one deserves to go through shit or eat shit to learn from shit. So… I am not taking on that mindset anymore. As a grown ass female, it’s not my responsibility to keep an eye on a grown ass man. To teach him shit that his elders failed or to figure out if what’s coming outta his mouth is true or not. I don’t want to nor do I have time for it. So, if I end up dating anyone in the future [single life is peaceful]… if he can’t keep it a 💯, he don’t need to be around me [or vice versa]. Simple really. Nothing more. Nothing less. 🤷🏼♀️ Be blessed everyone. 🙏🏼
This is the correct mindset. I feel the same as you! It also makes me baffled as to how they always complain that we women are the complicated ones. SMH, sorry but NO fucking way. Men are the most complicated creatures on planet earth.@@UnaBellissima
Mee too
The answers are not deep and complicated. They are actually surface level highly
I really hate when someone says "all men cheat" because it is simply unfair 😢My ex kept saying that and it was so hurtfull... Yes, I had some female friends and I had an opportunity but I never did that.
I take my honour and dignity from living according to my values. I remain faithfull for myself and for my pride as a man.
In some case I had to end the relationship but I never cheated. Unfortunately most women don't even want to hear such statement 😢
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
You have to realize men have traumatized women to the point women have zero faith in your gender. Blame other men for women's distrust of you. It is still happening and more than ever. The only difference is women are doing it as well and are no longer being brutalized for it while having to watch men get away with the same behavior. That's where it starts.
When we think a guy is faithful, he pulls the rug from under us. We eventually learn to stop hoping for a faithful man by watching our mothers, aunts and sisters and daughters be wronged by men. How long do you want women to hold out when we are constantly reminded of how fickle men can be when they have a functioning penis? Are you saying there is zero reason for women of today to be skeptical of men being faithful when history is a strong predictor of future bahavior?
Men just want women to conveniently forget how women of the past were treated. I'm sure if some men who don't want to do the work of establishing trust had their way, they'd just wipe the memories clean of newer generations of women like a robot as we become datable just to have an advantage. But that's impossible. It's ingrained in human dna to learn from situations that happen to others and avoid dangers. You're asking women to go against basic human nature because it makes it easier for you to keep a woman.
I'm a woman and hate when women say " all men cheat". They don't know all men in the world. Maybe the ones they met cheated. I've never cheated in any of my relationships, but got cheated on several times. I don't understand why some men and women don't appreciate the person that's good to them. Smh. A lot men and women seem to treat the good person like shit. They don't realize what they had until it's gone. Why is that? I have exes from years ago reaching out to me. Now, I'm in a new relationship but we have our ups and downs. We don't get a chance to spend a lot of time with each other, because of our financial circumstances. He's an hour away from me. I got laid off from my job, and he got hit my a flat bed truck while he was working delivering packaging. He had surgery on his knee and going through physical therapy. Therefore, he have been out of work for a while until doctor release him to go back to work. Sometimes he be in pain and don't want to be bothered. I have traveled to go see him but lately we haven't been seeings very challenging for the both of us. Sometimes I feel like giving up on this relationship, but he always tell me and show me he really care for me. If it's meant to be it will be. If not, then I'm good. It will hurt me because my heart is with him. But, life goes on.
Only trashy men cheat
Respect to values. I hear the same thing from the guys "all women are money grabbing cheats". That's not true either thank goodness.
I find it so funny that women are really asking the question "Can a man cheat on me and still love me?" Like, what? What difference does it make either way? He still cheated on you. Take your self respect and walk away.
omg, the phone behavior definitely lets you know they are cheating when you are trying to call them too, when your call is answered all the time and it suddenly stops getting answered or returned, and you reside with one another thats a serious red flag. Especially if they send a text instead of calling you lol.
Or they just flat it ignore you altogether.
True happening to me now. I'm on the way out the door.
@@1blkbeauty79 yep and dont look back either, they do not deserve a good woman. Its plenty of Kings out here just waiting for those boys to mess up so they can show us women how we are suppose to be treated as Queens CORRECTLY......, I now have that KING who loves me the right way and shows me and reassures me in every way possible that IM HIS QUEEN. Leave him in the dust girl
Thanks, I went through it. All signs were there, I ignored, he gaslighted. However now I'm so thankful for it. I am out of a long abusive relationship, but probably will stay if he didn't cheat. I'm now at peace and joy, closer to God. Love and light for everyone that is in this situation.
I don’t cheat no matter how bad the relationship. No excuses!!!!
Exactly! We overlook the signs, somehow in denial of how someone can hurt us in such a way when we truly love. When we finally value our worth and what we bring to the table, that's when you get the ugly truth and have to forgive ourselves for what we tried to push under the rug. Thank you Stephan for you knowledge🙏🏻
I've been cheated many times. I remember, it was not a good feeling to be in NEVER. The hardest is when you start thinking "What Im gonna do now", and the pressure against yourself you will start feeling but it feels good to walk away though it hurts. At some point, I began to have trust issues but I worked on myself. Because of my experience, I learned to discern how men can manipulate you just to get you. They know their words so well but you know when it's just words. Don't fall for sweet words.
If my future husband ever cheated, I would divorce him immediately and never give him a second chance. Stephan, I respectfully disagree with you when you say a man will cheat on his wife although he loves her. In my mind, cheaters do not love their spouse. When someone truly loves their spouse, they work out the issue(s) with their spouse, but they never cheat. True love means intentionally avoiding hurting your spouse.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, I appreciate hearing from you ❤
I completely agree with you! LOVE IS RESPECT! he had the choice not to cheat but he decided to do it anyways! if their impulse are greater than his love and respect for you, than he does not love you enough!
@@carlel121 Well said! 👏👏👏
You'll never hear a man say the same. They immediately won't believe you love them if you cheat. Women need to have the same mindset, we are too forgiving.
You'll hear very few men advocate for staying with a cheating woman. Not unless he can gain financially, but his resentment will surface in his actions. He will still plan on leaving once the benefit is over.
He will be hurt and leave. Women need to have the same standards men have. They often leave at the first sign of discomfort, distrust or resistance.
@@ScarletteRose164 Well said and SO VERY TRUE! 👏👏👏
You are an individual who can explain these things so clearly. You have a gift.
❤️ 🙂 Thank you!
Yes, full transparency on both sides is honourable in this day and age.
The intuition is so REAL!!!
I finally realized this. My gut was telling me he was lying. He had another woman the whole time even had her in the bed we sleep in smfh. I am beautiful, smart, and know how to treat my man his loss. At 46 I'm done dating they can have these damn weirdos😂😂
I never considered that there were signs prior to the actual cheating. I’ve never been cheated on but this is an interesting topic
Glad I could help 🙏
People meet one another as deep as they meet themselves
Cheating is a choice. You can give a person everything they say they want and need and do all the things you found in his search history and they will still cheat if they want to.
It definitely isn't an easy situation, but the focus needs to be on doing what is truly best 🙏
I feel like in this stage that our current society is in people should just expect to be cheated on and hope for the best. Sad but true! Social media, phones, dating apps, etc have ruined the way relationships are viewed. There is no value in it anymore…
I feel you, it definitely isn't an easy situation, but the focus needs to be on doing what is truly best 🙏
👏🏼
Exactly
You spoke it the best social media is relationships demise 😢and it’s so sad 😞
38 and I'm done.
I thank God I have all of these. I've truly found my person when I was just minding my business being happy, healed and single. Now I'm happy, healed and coupled!
So, I had to stay until I knew he was cheating because we were married and I could not be remarried until it was confirmed. However, it is true. I needed to be cheated on and for him to be caught to let go and stop trying.
I'm sorry to hear about that. I pray that you heal from all that you have been through and be able to keep moving in faith 🙏 ❤️
I understand. Been there.
All of these pointS are absolutely true .
I was just cheated by my boyfriend.
I should've listened to my intuition However i didn't instead i was questioning myself like am i being insecure or don't trust him!
But All this time my intuition was true. He was cheating on me. 😔
Im so hurt its been a month yet i still cant forget him.
I have forgiven him but not forgotten.
I still do miss him.
I'm sorry to hear about that. I pray that you heal from all that you have been through and be able to keep moving in faith 🙏 ❤️
So sorry to hear that love. Yea it sucks NOW but I promise you one day soon you will come back to this comment with literally no more feelings this guy. I promise you will get over it. This is apart of the process 💪🏽🙏🏽 Don’t hit him up, no matter how much you miss him. You will regret it later. Crying actually helps too so cry if you have to …
He wasn’t right for you cuz if a “ boyfriend “ will cheat on you… he didn’t love you.
F him woman. Forget him. Love your self. ❤️💗
I agree with you on the phone. My ex fiance showed all those signs. It was very apparent that he was hiding or doing something that he knew was inappropriate.
All men do not cheat, my husband is an example of it, I trust him a lot, all begin with his behavior, he does not hide anything, he is at home most of the time, he wants to go out with me always, he ask me to answer his phone, he has all his device sync, i am a believer that there are more men that do not cheat than we think! Because I have seen it!
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
👏🏼 good for u mamas ❤
Rare men still exist there just hard too find
A MAN CAN BE MARRIED FOR 22 YEARS AND CHEAT FOR 24 LOL MAYBE HE JUST DOES NOT LET YOU FEEL IT OR YOU TRAINED HIM THAT WAY OR YOU FRONTIN ON HERE💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯
@@passiiionuniiique 😂😂😂 of course!
I agree to the "some of us needed to be cheated on". I have a best friend who stayed in toxic relationships for too long even though she knew her ex bf was cheating with other girl. This girl was taunting my friend by sending pics and texts, but my friend would still be communicating and helping her loser ex. In the end the guy decided to marry the other girl 🤦♀️
I remember I was 24 and my bf at the time said if I hooked up with my previous ex before him he would forgive me because he knew that my ex treated me excellent and that I may still harbor feelings for him. I left the very next day this was in spring of that year. Come to find out HIS ex was coming home for summer and he wanted to hook up with her. He was so furious with me with tears in his eyes saying oh what did he do wrong. Ninja you ain’t did anything wrong but you were certainly plotting. His ex and I were colleagues as we were in the same band for carnival and his name came up when she was speaking about who her summer fling was and it clicked in my head ohhhhh this is why he said what he said. I never went back to him and never addressed it with her I just silently said I knew it! They were speaking since Valentine’s Day planning to hook up once she touch down for summer. So there was an overlap.
Thank you for sharing your experience! Hopefully, it will help others learn from it. I appreciate that 🙏
Entering into a relationship in today's world it's like
Persueing a MASTERS DEGREE ?
EYES
EARS
All five senses have to be top notch
It's to much brain taxing for me
Steph u made me laugh , cry , and breath a sigh of relief altogether
One thing am SURE of
We met cheating in this world
And we will die and leave it here also
Remedying this is left up to God Almighty
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
Then they use excuses “ if you going always accuse me cheating I should just cheat since I’m getting accused of cheating”
I'm on my marks getting set for this program..I need to help many of my fellow women who have toxic relationships .I will always spice it with the Good News of our Lord Yeshua .
I hate liars and cheaters!
Yes nail on the head! Wanting to PROVE the cheating. But the behavior IS enough!
He was asleep, and his phone fell off the nightstand and I picked it up to put it on the charger because I was getting out of bed to go to work, he woke up and reached for it immediately and I said,” what are you doing?” And he said “what?” Couldn’t that be a clear sign?
I found evidence where my ex told this lady he missed and loved her after I told him to leave and he still lied saying he never cheated for the record. Still toxic ASL. After the break up he lacks accountability and has issues I never paid attention to. I'm ready to move on and heal
I am dating a man who gets text messages from his ex. He says its nothing and she sends positive messages and she lives with her boyfriend. I think he is still emotionally attached to her and her boyfriend probably has no idea she is texting him..I'm thinking about moving on. We don't check each other's phone and I don't text men or have men friends..
Omg....I went thru that....plez believe its something still there.....cuz they are an EX for a reason.....I don't keep exes as friends.....thats dangerous.
If it’s a dealbreaker for you, leave. I’ve been there before, it’s disrespectful.
Been there. Boyfriend wouldn’t put a stop to it. He knew it was disrespectful and bothered me. He was getting a lot out of it…very selfish behavior.
I am in the same boat 😢
@MeetStephanSpeaks So many of your talks have my eyes welling up. I'm learning lessons from you and when you talk, I am matching your lesson with my real-life experiences. These lessons are the ones I've failed to learn over and over...thank you, I appreciate you! 💗
I'm happy this has been helpful to you. Don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
THANK YOU, I'm waiting patiently for my future husband! 😊
I pray that you receive the man who is truly best for you, the man God has for you 🙏
Lmao #1 yuppppp. Duhhh! If he trying to pick a fight so he can do his own shit, bye he leaving you to cheat. That’s obvious!
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback 🙏
I've had a few tell me they were going to cheat, and they did, and I left, but I did appreciate their honesty😮
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
I could never cheat on someone I love ... it's time to go when it gets to that. The person's not meeting your needs, then they're not the person for you, and you need to just move on and be honest and tell the other person this
A man I’m currently speaking with stated he pulled away from his wife (physically & emotionally) because she (for 6 yrs) made him the bad guy to HER kids. He said they would agree on rules for her teenage son & daughter. Then they would sit the kids down to communicate. He would set the rules but the wife NEVER spoke up or agreed with him in front of the kids. Therefore, their behavior never changed. He said he disconnected/pulled away from her, she eventually cheated and they divorced.
So true, I know I come from a whole different school, if I can't love, respect you, we need to part ways with, ease, grace, wish one another well, and keep it moving! Who does that, checking someone phone, that is how you know you are not mature enough to be in a relationship, who does that, many and sad! 😵😵😵😵😵😵People get the signs, don't be pay attention, I don't even deal with people that are not present, if they like the phone so much, go be with your phone and have a nice day! Get it 😜😜😜😜😜
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, I appreciate hearing from you ❤
ALL OF THIS! 👏👏👏
Besides, phones are personal to each one of us, so, checking someone's phone, in my opinion, is a violation of someone's privacy.
I'd NEVER do it.
Also when grown-ass men are too close to their mother. They will cheat because Mamma will support their actions. They can move back in with her. Fact!!!
Facts
Over look,exactly,its the fear of unknown,been there and its horrendous,im now happy with the right man, im finally happy
My ex was cheating because it lied about small things and always made excuses why he couldn’t be on the phone with me also I remember one night he lied to me saying he going to the airport to pick up my auntie but he was at home the whole time on the phone with another women . He always had an attitude with me and he stopped sharing his location then he used to gaslight me too .
I think you‘re right with the stuff your saying. It makes me so emotional because I‘ve known with my ex that something was up. He did almost all of the things you described. But I was really naive and never thought he‘d cheat. I was only 19 at the time. He gaslighted me so badly whenever I questioned him and I felt so bad to end it in case I was wrong and that I really was just confused and insecure. I didn‘t even think about him cheating I just thought that we were disconnected. But I tried reall hard to get him to open up to me but he wouldn‘t. Everytime I tried to leave him he wouldn‘t let me go and wouldn‘t give up or he‘d cry so much that I thought he must really love me. This experience has broken my trust deeply. I still don‘t get how we could be bestfriends and he‘d still betray me like that. His values otherwise aren‘t even in alignment with cheating so his behaviour really didn‘t make any sense to me still. I don‘t know how to feel. I feel confused and overwhelmed when I think about it even though we have broken up over a year ago. We were together for 5 years and I‘m 24 now. Even after we have reached rock bottom and there was nothing to hide anymore he‘d still tell me that he thought I‘d be his future wife. It hurt me deeply because I felt that he was my husband too but cheating goes against my values and my trust in him is not repairable. I‘m honestly happy single at the moment and feel a lot of peace. I love myself again. I was really angry with myself for being so weak and dumb and confused in the past. But I have forgiven myself. I just don‘t know if I‘m able to ever trust as deeply again. But after such a deep connection I long for a deep trust and friendship sometime in the future again, but I can‘t help but worrying that I‘ll put myself in a weak position if I choose to have a family with someone that‘ll cheat on me.
Good Topic ! Stephan 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽❤️ I have been through this! That’s why I’m still single! Period ! 💯
Oh my goodness, the last one was a whole wake up call! I never looked at our problems in a different way, but you just helped me to understand, and look at things from a whole different angle. THANK YOU! 🙏🏽 I love your books, and I love you. I love the way you explain “in detail” each topic. You give it to us cold, and that’s what us woman need! For real for real. I know I can be very hard to deal with, my poor husband, I’m not even sure how he’s stuck around for 25 years. Lord help me! 🙏🏽🫠
Thank you for speaking about sharing your world together! This is something I always felt in my ❤ that was important to me & I felt as though it's concerning when someone doesn't want to share, even to gain understanding of who the person is.
Thankyou for taking the time to post such a useful video. I found it to be useful in my situation and helps clarify a few of those iffey scenarios
God Bless
Loved the episode so on point. For the ladies, another few ways to tell if your man has been cheating on you is if your PH level of your 👛 changes, if his sexual behavior changes, change in cologne like he way always using Hugo Sport and decide to start buying Versace when you know he can't even spell Versace, and if you dress up to go out and he starts to question you about where are you going dressed up yeah he cheating.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, I appreciate hearing from you ❤
Ph level is a big indicator. Couldn’t figure out why ish was always going on down there. Thankfully nothing SERIOUS. Just yeast or BV. But still. So not only was my ex husband cheating, he wasn’t even wearing a condom. Thank God I found the strength to leave. Been fresh as a daisy ever since!!
Kendraraffington what did you use to get rid of BV?
@@tammiebellon1877 You have to go to the doctor. There is nothing over the counter. And I am not sure any of those homeopathic remedies would work. They might mask things, but not cure. The doctor will prescribe Flagyl. Or something similar, if you are allergic to Flagyl. It kills the bacteria, as it's an anti-bacterial medication. It's like a 7 day treatment of taking pills. Something like that. Maybe 5. By day 2, you are straight, but you must take the whole course of treatment. Hope that helps!! Us girls must stick together and share all kinds of information.
I'm currently pregnant, just found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me with multiple ladies, I broke up with him and to cut all ties, but now we have a baby on the way and must plan everything together, Doctors appointments, baby clothes etc. How do I go about with this??
You don’t have to plan anything together physically. He doesn’t have to be at the doctor appointments nor does he have to pick out baby clothes with you. What he does need to do is help you with the baby and anything the baby needs but you need to cut off physically being around him. Yes it is important to co parent but you are Not in a relationship any more and you need to fully comprehend that and start making boundaries
I think he can and still say they ❤ you I don't think so
You are a fantastic speaker. I really appreciate and find interest in your advice even on the little sub points in each piece. Thank you for putting together such intelligent, wise and insightful information to help bring awareness to others. I respect how clear you make the point that you are not validating certain things and that just because particular signs are present, doesn’t always equal cheating. Some creators go so deep into their own opinions and beliefs, they do not share the other sides to things. They make it as though it is fact that one is unfaithful if they show particular signs for things as opposed to looking at multiple perspectives, right down to possible mental health struggles.
omggggg the gaslighting is soooo true i was called crazy when i bring up how he was moving as if he was cheating or it was another woman, and i was always called crazy, i need to chill out this and that, you assuming stuff this and that, but you not coming home so which is it dude. thats whats gonna make a woman crazy, when the signs are in her face but being told otherwise lol
i think that's a good prospective why are we fighting i ask myself this all the time i have been married for 10 years and out of nowhere 2 years ago m husband started starting fights out of no where for example he came home one day (i'm at stay at home mom) he did t even speak he went over to our windows and started shutting them (i had them raised because i had be reorganizing and deep cleaning allday he was so pissed off that i opened the windows he left for 5 days
i didn't even get to say anything back he yelled for 10 mins calling me irresponsible because people could see inside our house (wtf type of logic is that) so to answer your question i did ask myself why are we fighting vs why is he cheating and to be honest i don't think anything was wrong i think he just wanted to leave without me being able to call and ask him for anything if we're getting alone then i should be able to call him but if he's mad over a fake arguement he can cheat in peace and block me
It hurts when you still love him and miss him.
The number 1 thing when a man cheats is he starts to really get into his appearance and how he looks and when your gut is telling you listern to it 😮
Thank u handsome for opening a lot of womens eyes
Does anyone know if Stephan has a video on Gaslighting? I am just learning in Therapy that I've been dealing with gaslighting for a couple years now with my ex partner and I am so tired of being confused and like I am not remembering things correctly. I finally started writing things down, called my ex out, and he said "we just see things differently". I have to co-parent with this man and I am so scared for this new journey and how to protect my mind.
Dang! You done got on TY and told my entire store for the last 20 plus years… the kids are grown now. Love has been a battlefield, and the kids were caught in the crossfire. I rose my white flag. Uncle, uncle! I tap out!!!
I pray that you heal from all that you have been through 🙏
No! There’s a huge difference between privacy and secrecy! If there’s nothing to hide, you should be totally fine with showing your phone! 📱
Great perspective!! Honestly a lot of the things you said I’ve never thought of in that light. Kinda see some stuff a little different
Am I tripping? On 2 occasions, I have been accused of going through his phone. On the Most High, I did not do what I was accused of twice. Both times, the convo got so heated because I refused to say I did, what I know I didn't. In both situations, it ended up with him drawing his fist back at me. His phone is ALWAYS face down. Now I'm not slow, insecure, paranoid, crazy, or plain stupid. When a man goes to the extreme that he will draw his fist back as if he wants to hit you, something is horribly wrong. It's not open handed, which is bad, too. But a closed fist. The deepest part is, when you feel cautious of Him after these actions, he says, "You hold grudges." Men, women don't forget what deeply hurts them. Per DJ, LOVE DOES NOT DAMAGE. Anywho.
Cheating is never a mistake. He might have put himself in an unwise situation talking to another woman but when the intimacy occurs it's a choice.
A professional cheater knows what to do, how to do it and when as well as where. They are slick and they are able to deceive easily, especially if he's disrespectful and able to lie so easily, then want affection or to be sexual but not give in many other areas, in which feeds into a woman in honestly loving her and feeding into her. It's not going to happen. They want you to give to them while they take from you and will you use you and keep you because you're good to them, while they'll be awful to you! Drain you off all you have within and leave you in that state unless you see your worth!!! Give to yourself ladies!!! Love yourself more! It's a sad deal when you fall into this trap! 7 years of the same repetition. Almost killed me on every level. Until i woke up and pulled back and stopped being sexual because of the abuse. I can't give myself to someone who doesn't see my value! Let alone not able to trust when they've proved who they are!!!
So much information , information that I needed to hear . Many questions in my mind that you’ve answered in the blog and I’m glad I watch your channel . I’ve subscribed so hear from you more .
They just get two phones and hide the other one in the car
The biggest sign you didn’t mention is. Not necessarily 1 sign here 1 sign there it’s a convergence of multiple signs.
Another sign is treating you with distain. It’s used as a justification to cheat.
That's so true even if it's hard.I needed him to cheat in order to feel free
But to a woman, cheating is the ultimate stab in the heart. 😭💔
What is wrong with someone….when you know there is cheating but can’t leave? How does a person get help for this? If already done many counseling sessions for the years and years of the relationship. 😢
Yes the intimacy thing . He has ciallus ( ed liquid) but we dont have a relationship seems the liquid in the little bottle is low .
When a man says “all men cheat” definitely going to do it! 😮 this happened to me.
Phone games too, my ex was acting weird when I discovered he was cheating. He took into the bathroom all the sudden! All the time when he would be on the phone all that much. Then all the he was having an affair.
Thank you for sharing your experience! Hopefully, it will help others learn from it. I appreciate that 🙏
Best video, Stephan. Thank u 👍🏽
Everything uve said is on point. If his not one, gather strength and walk away.
If my husband did that to me it would break my heart in a thousand pieces and I could never accept him again, no matter if he still love me. To me, his love would not matter anymore.
I would break something all right.
Gass lighting is a real thing it happens to me 😢
I really don’t have any reasons to suspect my man cheating on me but I can’t stop stressing all day everyday that he is :( idk what’s wrong with me
Your intuition is a valuable tool. Don’t ignore it!
Always important to listen to your intuition
Trust yourself and investigate. Or are you around other women who are being cheated on that triggers this feeling? If there are no external factors making you think this, then something isn't right with the relationship internally.
Women have a stronger connection to our intuition for a reason. We are weaker and cannot risk getting into a situation we can't get out of physically.
It's ingrained in our DNA for us to survive based on intuition while men have physical strength, they can remove themselves from dangerous situations once it starts, we cannot so easily.
Just watch him and observe, men always reveal themselves. If he isn't, then he has no reason to worry.
That’s your intuition
@@Kirra713 intuition or paranoia cause it’s happened to me before? Never really know.
Thank you for your awesome videos ❤
Sign #1: He's converting oxygen into carbon dioxide.
Sign #2: His mouth is moving and sound is coming out of it.
Sign #3: The water he drank happened to be wet that day.
Sign #4: His shirt fell on the floor when he took it off due to the value of gravity on Earth being 9.80665 m/s^2.
Sign #5: It's a day of the week that ends in 'y.'
Spot on 💯
❤️ 🙂 Thank you!
@@MeetStephanSpeaks you're welcome 🤍
Too caught up in trying to prove he's cheating instead of accepting the fact the behavior is disrespectful, deceitful and consistent after many conversations. There has been temporary change over 2yrs. He defaults right back to his original setting...I needed to hear that...
Thank you for the information.
Flag over here .. flag over there ... 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 everywhere
It definitely isn't an easy situation, but the focus needs to be on doing what is truly best 🙏
Absolutely, ex husband use to tell me not to touch his fn phone 👀 oh he had a text she is ready to meet you
🙏
Thank u for this video. Making sure I will take notes on this ❤❤❤❤
Glad to hear that, thank you for your response!
The most painful 💔 experience . I discovered stephan speaks after my experience , I would have never made it😅, gaaaaad its terrible. As crazy as it may sound, I am glad he cheated it was necessary! I needed a push to leave his dysfunctional (love) for goooooood 😅
There's no honor no honor at all!
Thank you Stephan
I'm sorry to hear about that. I pray that you heal from all that you have been through and be able to keep moving in faith 🙏 ❤️
Thank you, ❤❤
I go into relationship in trusting him till he gives me a reason. When thinks goes certain why with your relationship and all sudden call, texts and staying out plus secretive with his phone definitely sign of a cheating man
You're so handsome. Great advice God bless you
You can emotionally cheat
your opinion:I have smb since 4 months and he lives in another country (2h with plane) we meet once and was Magic.A nice guy with personality. After we sleeped together was same intensity and I got more feeling for him.We talk everyday for everything and when I talk about feelings he like to hear what i feel nd get nervous. Only when we habe a disscusion he express me his own feelings.we Planned a second date in another country there where both Our families lives(same nationality)I have a small baby and my sister with and we planned we stay 1 night Together and I ll Cook for him bologniese.He told me he ll Stay there 4 days cause his mother is alone.The night I was reserving the ticket plane for me my sis and my little baby he asked me if I was sure cause is along tripp for my little baby and me from the Airport to destination city(3h)and was better than he comes to meet me here where I live after this tripp is oder cause he is going to meet his mother.Our first date was about 2 months ago.I was so sad.I canceled it and he was so clingy telling me he has feelings.I am sure he is Meeting smb there but I can never prove it.what should I Do?
Interesting video! 🙏🏾
❤️ 🙂 Thank you!
Thanks Stephan
SO accurate.
Right it’s true 😢
When He's breathing.😢