It's actually a nightmare if you have kids and these traits show up, in either men or women. It effects the life story and experience in everyone involved.
Sad but so true. Therapy is important some people are sadly this way and non-one will foresee it. Everyone is a victim in this sinking ship. You either jump off or drown with them. It only takes one person to mess this up.
@@keithgreer462SH#TT DONT WORK ON THIS HER STREETS ESPECIALLY NOT THESE DAYS SHE GOT THAT COLLEGE GOT TO USE HER BOOK KNOWLEDG COLLEGE DEGREES E NOT BY EXPERIENCE SPIT THAT BOOK ON RUclips GET HOME BE A WHOLE DIFFERENT STORY
It looks like my relationship at the moment. Narcissistic tendencies seem to align with a lack of self-control and the absence of long-term goals. Major turn off, lesson learned 😅
Why do women always want someone with major long term goals? What if his long term goal is to meet the girl of god dreams and raise a family? Wussy’s wrong with that? Why does he have to want to be a billionaire online influencer in 5 years? Not everyone is seduced by fake and money
She just mentioned my father, and unfortunately I have to work on self control myself because of adoption of his mannerisms and such, it's a cycle I don't want to repeat
This is important. I think young women should wait to get married. Relationships involve compromising. You can't compromise a Self you have never developed. You can't choose a partner properly without some experience. You need a strong enough sense of Self to know that it is okay to have "requirements " with men. To have expectations. He may have many good qualities, but without Self control he will sabotage everything. She is so right.
I agree except I don't agree with putting an age on it. There are plenty of "young" people I meet with a better sense of Self than most middle-aged people I meet.
Since it wasn't mentioned in this clip, it is said here: violence. Violent speech and violent actions are destructive to your relationship and your family. Keep in mind that many violent men appear self-controlled and are calculated in their actions. Stay aware.
@@MissionTapasya yes this is true. You see theirs people that say and do what they want and people that follow.. No pun intended you would be a follower because you felt I spelled roll role wrong. What you don't understand is the English language was created by a human and people chose to follow what they said. That's what's wrong with the world 2 many followers again not being disrespectful just honest. This platform is my only contact yo the outside internet land. I don't do facefvvk snspshit.. Etc.
@@MissionTapasya hay no I'm sorry for how ever you took it. I was meaning like you are what your taught not what you could should be. Theirs no way I can fix how you took what I said other than saying... no I'm sorry. Have a good one last thing I want to to is disrespect you.
Great relationship advice! I had the "on-paper" marriage but did not have this knowledge. After a 9 yr marriage, 2 kids, a divorce, and 7 years of therapy and self-development, I'm grateful to have learned this 💯✍️🏽
This is so true. My guy is like that, he is often moody, in bad mood,he cant handle his own emotion. No gambling no alcohol/drug involved. He is just too emotional n impulsive n he is overwhelmed,i love him dearly and stand by his side, supporting him🎉❤
@@JohnBrown-wr8co i have been with him 22 years now, we have two wonderful children. In a relationship or marriage, you just dont simply give up and walk away. At least not me.
Well tbh I think the best thing to do is try and break down HOW to support him. Ask him what is the problem? Tbh it may not even be a problem. He may just be tired. Does he work full time? Does he go to the gym? Does he take all the right supplements and hydrate himself regularly to keep his energy levels up? Does he eat enough etc etc it may not necessarily be a mental/ psychological issue.
I’m very glad to have come across your channel and work. We so need women like yourself to continue sharing the types of messages that you do. Many thanks and great work. 🙏
@@Cadmeeyummen are responsible for most things in the world dear. One thing we cannot be responsible for is women’s self control, or lack of it. Women used to have great self control, or at least were able to give that appearance. Nowadays, not only are they not able to exercise self control, the actively celebrate it.
@@StoutProperright, men are responsible for a lot of things in the world, including the good and bad in it. Due to that power, it is much worse for a woman to be with a man that is out of control because a lot of those “things” that you mentioned are in his hands. And I think it goes without having to say, anyone without self control is a liability - man or woman. And neither party is responsible for the others behavior. There’s no need to compete or one up here.
My father was a General Contractor in NYC 60's, 70's, 80's and 90's. He was the fly off the handle type. It scared me and he turned his attention to his family his whole demeanor would change. Anything to make me happy. We knew that tough guy was for his money and the money we enjoyed growing up, not for us. We were his absolute love. He risked his life for us in that business. He would not pay a contractor and the guy would come after his with a gun. Then the guy got paid. It was really like that in my house. He was a savage in business, but when I wanted to play catch, he'd put everything to the side for me.
Her analysis regarding self-control is spot on. I can recall vividly how I thought and behaved during my active alcohol addiction versus being clean & sober.
I'm definitely trying to stay far away from a man with no self control after being married to that for 25 yrs I was having to fix his mistakes and make excuses for his behavior all the time I got tired and divorced him he's old now and alone with almost nothing today. No balance on Nothing!!!!
@sofiacornejo1056 As I understand it, compulsion greatly accentuates addictive yearnings. Compulsion is the undeniable need to relieve pain/unease through certain repetitive actions. Addiction is linked more towards the pleasure center of the brain and the gradual increase in triggering that specific pleasure node. Now, take an addiction that can easily become a habit due to incessant repetition, then add the multiplying effect of a brain suffering from compulsive behavior, and you've got a situation where compulsion becomes a turbo charger for the addiction, increasing usage and speeding up / intensifying the addiction.
I'm a former drug addict. Everyday my restraint and control are tested. Everyday I have to accept that I'll never be who I was, or who I could have been.
Thanks for this Doc. Brilliant advice as usual. A man's strength is self control. When he loses self control, everything around him crumbles and fragments. A woman's strength is her silence (her ability to verbally restrain herself). When she cannot be silent, everything around her can become chaotic. Of course, she should never be silent if being abused.
You have the voice that most men seek, it does things, comfort I would say. I would be nowhere your league but does make me want to protect so with that analogy shows it works.
Whew that was cold. I like it. This why I try to fast on Mondays and Thursdays like the prophet Muhammad. Not just in Ramadan. Fasting is a way of practicing discipline and self-control. If you can do that. You can fast from many other things. Like I always say, knock it off Sadia, you always manage to throw men in there having multiple women. What does the Quran say? I will take my three or four. Thank you. In Shaa Allah
remember also brother, Allah warns us, if you are not able to maintain justice and equality among your wives, then you must take only one. it is your responsibility to do it properly, to buy separate houses for each wife to live in and not to foster feelings of jealousy and discontent among them. if you are not prepared to do this then it is best to take only one.
As a woman, I totally agree with her. My ex-boyfriend lacked self control, that has lead him into a lonely bitter life. He has narcissistic tendencies, has cheated on every single women that his been with. I would hate to be him, his miserable. I pray for him, he has a lot of weight on his shoulders.
Remember never to be too sanctimonious. Understand where you have been a partaker and then form your thoughts. Don't go in a spiral like most women who want to absolve themselves any responsibility.
As always Louis’s warm engagement and being sincere with his guests are what draws people to him. However, what she’s talking about here is all common sense.
This is true. I speak from experience. I did not have self control for many years of my life. Then God showed up, I didn't realise at the time. Got into recovery. Went to AA. 12 step programme and found Our Lord Jesus Christ Amen. I've made it to 60 years of age. Miracle 👍👋♥️🇬🇧
I know a couple who are both off the chart, it's like they're use to the crazy. It blows my mind how they can do it day after day. However... they are calming down in their older age. Thank God
Some men lose self control when their wife cheats on him. Especially when they promise not to cheat again and they know their lying to you again. They deceived you knowing she not going to stop cheating. Any hurt man will lose control.
I read Eight Dates as if I was dating myself, and the first chapter is Trust. I realised I could not be trusted to look after me and have spent the last 18 months developing self-control. I wasn't a complete failure. However, plenty I say plenty of room for improvement. I am my parents' daughter, and they were neglected, so we all did our best 💞
So true. How I wish I heard this at age 20 . Was married 23 years had kids after 10 years because was hoping he’d grow up. Didn’t happen he was angry and abusive to our kids, I divorced him, very nasty divorce and terrible co parent. People please run from angry people with no self control!!!!
I have more control and better new marriage. But not just because of experience and will, but because I also choose to be where my control stays. So, everything is relative.
Aggressive verbal outburst, because of all the other lack of self control she has mentioned.That one is scary.
Verbal? How about physical?
@@StoutProper Goes without saying.
Unfortunately I married someone like that but God/ Jesus saved us
@@PREGOMILLIE Hope you’re doing well💞💪🏼
Anyone when pushed and pushed and pushed with have an outburst. And the pusher is in fact the abuser in many situations. Deal with it.
It's actually a nightmare if you have kids and these traits show up, in either men or women. It effects the life story and experience in everyone involved.
Sad but so true. Therapy is important some people are sadly this way and non-one will foresee it. Everyone is a victim in this sinking ship. You either jump off or drown with them. It only takes one person to mess this up.
You should have seen this coming way before hooking up 😅
Its truly scary...❤😢
Man she is spitting facts here
This chick is clueless dude
@@keithgreer462SH#TT DONT WORK ON THIS HER STREETS ESPECIALLY NOT THESE DAYS SHE GOT THAT COLLEGE GOT TO USE HER BOOK KNOWLEDG COLLEGE DEGREES E NOT BY EXPERIENCE SPIT THAT BOOK ON RUclips GET HOME BE A WHOLE DIFFERENT STORY
She speaks the truth.
This lady is a tremendous blessing to humanity....
GOD bless you richly....
It looks like my relationship at the moment. Narcissistic tendencies seem to align with a lack of self-control and the absence of long-term goals. Major turn off, lesson learned 😅
Why do women always want someone with major long term goals? What if his long term goal is to meet the girl of god dreams and raise a family? Wussy’s wrong with that? Why does he have to want to be a billionaire online influencer in 5 years? Not everyone is seduced by fake and money
Do you think compulsivity is also associated with a narcissist?
Why do women play the narcissist card constantly now? Its just gaslighting for boundary setting
@@liddobear1125based on my ex. I do believe that
@@liddobear1125impulsivity definitely is…
She just mentioned my father, and unfortunately I have to work on self control myself because of adoption of his mannerisms and such, it's a cycle I don't want to repeat
This is important. I think young women should wait to get married. Relationships involve compromising. You can't compromise a Self you have never developed. You can't choose a partner properly without some experience. You need a strong enough sense of Self to know that it is okay to have "requirements " with men. To have expectations.
He may have many good qualities, but without Self control he will sabotage everything. She is so right.
I agree except I don't agree with putting an age on it. There are plenty of "young" people I meet with a better sense of Self than most middle-aged people I meet.
You need to endure no man is perfect but in general is you give respect and suport must man are generally responsible and loyal
I disagree. The longer you stay by yourself the more rigid you become. The power of a long term relationship is strengthened by growth together.
True
@@RubenDeanda-lb9wrYou can endure somethings, not all things. Sometimes it’s healthier to walk away than to stay.
Since it wasn't mentioned in this clip, it is said here: violence. Violent speech and violent actions are destructive to your relationship and your family. Keep in mind that many violent men appear self-controlled and are calculated in their actions. Stay aware.
And I would add: thé violence could take the form of marital rape or incest on kids
So be aware of Trump supporters?
@@Tony-yd1vx Please be broadminded: Be aware of anyone who exhibits unnecessarily or surprisingly aggressive behavior.
Yes, I agree with you and also be weary of verbal abuse.@@tarawiselove
@@Tony-yd1vxairhead 😂
I like you... Always have.. Thanks for being a good roll model 2 our youth.. Hold strong, its a tough ride... Good people fight the hardest fight
@@MissionTapasya yes this is true. You see theirs people that say and do what they want and people that follow.. No pun intended you would be a follower because you felt I spelled roll role wrong. What you don't understand is the English language was created by a human and people chose to follow what they said. That's what's wrong with the world 2 many followers again not being disrespectful just honest. This platform is my only contact yo the outside internet land. I don't do facefvvk snspshit.. Etc.
@@1331RECIPROCITY chill bro,that was meant to light hearted pun
But still my appologies
Have a nice day
@@MissionTapasya hay no I'm sorry for how ever you took it. I was meaning like you are what your taught not what you could should be. Theirs no way I can fix how you took what I said other than saying... no I'm sorry. Have a good one last thing I want to to is disrespect you.
I have no self control 😖 definately something I have to work on ASAP. I needed to see this! Thank you ❤
The first is to admit and you did.❤
Bless you for realising this and doing something about it. Strength to you ❤
you got this
Take it one step one day at a time
Thank you all ❤️ my eating habits were crazy because I lost/had no self control. 2 weeks into my new lifestyle and im down 4kgs. ❤️
Great relationship advice! I had the "on-paper" marriage but did not have this knowledge. After a 9 yr marriage, 2 kids, a divorce, and 7 years of therapy and self-development, I'm grateful to have learned this 💯✍️🏽
She has SO MUCH wisdom.
This is so true. My guy is like that, he is often moody, in bad mood,he cant handle his own emotion. No gambling no alcohol/drug involved. He is just too emotional n impulsive n he is overwhelmed,i love him dearly and stand by his side, supporting him🎉❤
For how long, women inevitable move on or get fed up.
Women tend to fit the hypergamy trait.
@@JohnBrown-wr8co i have been with him 22 years now, we have two wonderful children. In a relationship or marriage, you just dont simply give up and walk away. At least not me.
Well tbh I think the best thing to do is try and break down HOW to support him. Ask him what is the problem? Tbh it may not even be a problem. He may just be tired. Does he work full time? Does he go to the gym? Does he take all the right supplements and hydrate himself regularly to keep his energy levels up? Does he eat enough etc etc it may not necessarily be a mental/ psychological issue.
That is so true. Will leave you empty, in debt, in regret, and disappointed.
Funny, all women leave men feeling the same.
Facts, nothing but facts.
I’m very glad to have come across your channel and work. We so need women like yourself to continue sharing the types of messages that you do. Many thanks and great work. 🙏
This…. I was was thinking this all morning.
Same is true for women that lack selfcontrol.
Can men be responsible for just one thing? Ever?
@@Cadmeeyummen are responsible for most things in the world dear. One thing we cannot be responsible for is women’s self control, or lack of it. Women used to have great self control, or at least were able to give that appearance. Nowadays, not only are they not able to exercise self control, the actively celebrate it.
@@StoutPropercouldn't agree more 💯
@@StoutProperright, men are responsible for a lot of things in the world, including the good and bad in it.
Due to that power, it is much worse for a woman to be with a man that is out of control because a lot of those “things” that you mentioned are in his hands.
And I think it goes without having to say, anyone without self control is a liability - man or woman. And neither party is responsible for the others behavior.
There’s no need to compete or one up here.
@shailahasib9156 Yet that is exactly what girls go for. Then whine and complain and use the decent men.
She’s gorgeous.
My father was a General Contractor in NYC 60's, 70's, 80's and 90's. He was the fly off the handle type. It scared me and he turned his attention to his family his whole demeanor would change. Anything to make me happy. We knew that tough guy was for his money and the money we enjoyed growing up, not for us. We were his absolute love. He risked his life for us in that business. He would not pay a contractor and the guy would come after his with a gun. Then the guy got paid. It was really like that in my house. He was a savage in business, but when I wanted to play catch, he'd put everything to the side for me.
True oh my God sooooo spot on .. lack self control is out of control 👿💯
Her analysis regarding self-control is spot on.
I can recall vividly how I thought and behaved during my active alcohol addiction versus being clean & sober.
This is so powerful!💥
I'm definitely trying to stay far away from a man with no self control after being married to that for 25 yrs I was having to fix his mistakes and make excuses for his behavior all the time I got tired and divorced him he's old now and alone with almost nothing today. No balance on Nothing!!!!
Compulsion and addiction are absolute monsters to deal with.
Does compulsion and addiction go together.? I’be very little understanding for a person who has an addiction problem.
@sofiacornejo1056 As I understand it, compulsion greatly accentuates addictive yearnings.
Compulsion is the undeniable need to relieve pain/unease through certain repetitive actions.
Addiction is linked more towards the pleasure center of the brain and the gradual increase in triggering that specific pleasure node.
Now, take an addiction that can easily become a habit due to incessant repetition, then add the multiplying effect of a brain suffering from compulsive behavior, and you've got a situation where compulsion becomes a turbo charger for the addiction, increasing usage and speeding up / intensifying the addiction.
Compulsive gambling addict due to complex PTSD stemming from childhood checking in.
You are correct.
Yes. Well defined. I check every box and it's been a hurtful life to not only myself but the ones I care about the most
She’s brilliant ❤
She's a breathe of refresh air
Lack of SelfControl? She speak like an Angel
This is the best I heard ❤️ thank you so much 💗
She speaks for my analysis of a way of life very well.
Even a day with no control, u spoke my mind babe
I can say from experience this is true. Suffering the consequences of a man without self control. Heartbreaking
I'm a former drug addict. Everyday my restraint and control are tested. Everyday I have to accept that I'll never be who I was, or who I could have been.
I can’t imagine her having a boyfriend. He must feel so screened and analyzed
Thanks for this Doc. Brilliant advice as usual. A man's strength is self control. When he loses self control, everything around him crumbles and fragments. A woman's strength is her silence (her ability to verbally restrain herself). When she cannot be silent, everything around her can become chaotic. Of course, she should never be silent if being abused.
She is spot on.
You look so good together )
You have the voice that most men seek, it does things, comfort I would say. I would be nowhere your league but does make me want to protect so with that analogy shows it works.
Whew that was cold. I like it. This why I try to fast on Mondays and Thursdays like the prophet Muhammad. Not just in Ramadan. Fasting is a way of practicing discipline and self-control. If you can do that. You can fast from many other things. Like I always say, knock it off Sadia, you always manage to throw men in there having multiple women. What does the Quran say? I will take my three or four. Thank you. In Shaa Allah
remember also brother, Allah warns us, if you are not able to maintain justice and equality among your wives, then you must take only one. it is your responsibility to do it properly, to buy separate houses for each wife to live in and not to foster feelings of jealousy and discontent among them. if you are not prepared to do this then it is best to take only one.
@@everyonesaidmynamewasstupi3713I got this brother. Trust me.
She is speaking facts IMO
She is sooooo Beautiful!
💯 well stated.
Dondra Holloman of Richland GA is just like this!! No self control at all and on drugs!!
She is so so smart. Insightful.
Very good points and very good idea to instill this character in our children.
She is so gorgeous ❤
Unfortunately in my case it was the woman with no self control.
This woman has so much wisdom and beauty❤
A great way to voice that
We only listen to her because she is attractive 😢
Yep! I lived it with him!
I’ve always believed that anyone who has no self control, has given it up to someone else at any given moment when you can’t control yourself.
THANK YOU!!! SHE IS ABSOLUTELY CORRECT!!! WOMEN HATE!!! ME BECAUSE I KEEP MY IDENTITY AS AN INDEPENDENT MAN!! TOTALLY SELF SUFFICIENT.
The entire interview is a must watch/listen too!
Excellent interview!
What is the name of the PC?
This is true! She is right! 💯
Sadia reminds me of Tia Carerra!!! So beautiful. She is so good for a logical counter to this red pill movement!
As a woman, I totally agree with her. My ex-boyfriend lacked self control, that has lead him into a lonely bitter life. He has narcissistic tendencies, has cheated on every single women that his been with. I would hate to be him, his miserable. I pray for him, he has a lot of weight on his shoulders.
Remember never to be too sanctimonious. Understand where you have been a partaker and then form your thoughts. Don't go in a spiral like most women who want to absolve themselves any responsibility.
The most important self control is money .
This woman looks like a sophisticated, classy, reserved, humble Kim Kardashian
Proud to say, i used to be like this 8yrs ago but now I'm happy to say i know my worth, im a high value woman
no you arent.
Always about you 🙄
Love it. Thank you.
Thisisexcellent advice not only for men but for women also😊.
As always Louis’s warm engagement and being sincere with his guests are what draws people to him. However, what she’s talking about here is all common sense.
I love this woman ...and her knowledge
She is so right
I have a profound level of respect for those who can exercise self control. Man or woman.
Good conversation, I love this, thank you
Women need self control
Duhhhhhh. She isn't saying they don't but thats not the topic.
Very powerful, very true!
This is true. I speak from experience. I did not have self control for many years of my life. Then God showed up, I didn't realise at the time. Got into recovery. Went to AA. 12 step programme and found Our Lord Jesus Christ Amen. I've made it to 60 years of age. Miracle 👍👋♥️🇬🇧
she only does the good stuff. I dig it
She is truly one of the most beautiful women, I have ever seen.
Just another pretty face 😍
self control is key..well said.
💯 I would love a simple good man with Consciousness than a foo with all paper. Smh
There are too many people who think they are in control even as they are spiraling downward.
This certainly goes both ways
She’s totally correct ✅
I too like this woman❤❤
A woman without self control is a liability for the whole family unit.
I know a couple who are both off the chart, it's like they're use to the crazy. It blows my mind how they can do it day after day. However... they are calming down in their older age. Thank God
I'm so glad that I learned this early!👌
Oh my goodness THIS part.
That goes both ways.
I’ve so many men and women without self control. And that usually comes with addictions of any sort.
That's a good answer 🎉🎉
Some men lose self control when their wife cheats on him. Especially when they promise not to cheat again and they know their lying to you again. They deceived you knowing she not going to stop cheating. Any hurt man will lose control.
💯 I’m in this situation where I think I’m ok now clean & then next second I’m addict again & massive liability
How amazing she is for just stating the obvious...
Absolutely right
Wow. Not often talked about. This confirms something/someone I am dealing with
I read Eight Dates as if I was dating myself, and the first chapter is Trust. I realised I could not be trusted to look after me and have spent the last 18 months developing self-control.
I wasn't a complete failure. However, plenty I say plenty of room for improvement.
I am my parents' daughter, and they were neglected, so we all did our best 💞
he can have "self control" and still cheat lie and abuse you emotionally, my father is a narc and he did all that without blowing a fuse
She just described Australian Society 🇦🇺👀🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺
Why do you say that?
@@LisaMarieAdamsbecause they have bookies in pubs 😂
Great point
100% she is right.
He's like a city without walls.
She doesn't miss its all facts
So true. How I wish I heard this at age 20 . Was married 23 years had kids after 10 years because was hoping he’d grow up. Didn’t happen he was angry and abusive to our kids, I divorced him, very nasty divorce and terrible co parent. People please run from angry people with no self control!!!!
I have more control and better new marriage. But not just because of experience and will, but because I also choose to be where my control stays. So, everything is relative.