4 Psychological Tricks That Make You Look Fearless
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- Опубликовано: 9 май 2024
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Tommy Shelby was our most requested video ever. So today we’re doing a breakdown that’s long overdue: his frenemy, Alfie Solomons.
While you don’t want to be like Alfie in every way, there are 4 habits you can learn from him to instantly command more respect from the people around you.
And even though Peaky Blinders is a scripted TV show, all the psychology covered in today’s video will apply to your actual life.
How To Be Fearless Under Pressure (Thomas Shelby):
• How To Be Fearless Und...
⏰TIMESTAMPS⏰
0:00 - Intro
0:41 - #1: Be calm in situations where most people
2:12 - #2: Hold eye contact during conflict
3:30 - #3: Don't let other people dictate where your attention goes
5:02 - #4: Be honest even when it goes against your best interests
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#AlfieSolomons #PeakyBlinders #CharismaOnCommand
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Hey guys, we hope you liked today’s video! Who would like us to break down next? :-)
loving the channel!
you should make shorts, where videos are summaries of advice. RUclips will eat it up
Norm Macdonald!!
Norm MAC donald!
Blake Griffin's good friend Nooorm!
Definitely Norm MacDonald
1. Be calm in situations where most people would show fear;
2. Hold eye contact during conflict;
3. Don’t let other people dictate where your attention goes; and
4. Be honest even when it goes against your best interest.
thank you
This was kinda pointless
@@owethunala2632 🤣🤣🤣🤣
@Ryan Brunker thats.... literally what the original comment said
@@nulle.k in case someone misses the original comment obviously
“Attitude is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.” Roy T. Bennett 🖖
Wisdom told me that I had to do something or the situation would become violent. So I broke his nose.
Noted sir.⭐
This is the one. Ignore the video, and look to things more like this quote.
@@Sagittarius-81 The video and the quote are very far from contradictory.
@@joshc5309 josh your pic shows me you far from a man you another weak minded boy
1. Be calm in situations where most people would show fear
2. Hold eye contact during conflict
3. Don't let other people dictate where your attention goes
4. Be honest even when it goes against your best interests
Basically, be Norm Macdonald on The View.
thank you my friend
Don't apologise just to avoid conflict.
O
I’m so very sorry!
Alfie Solomons (as played by Tom Hardy) is one of the greatest characters in television history.
Tom Hardy is pretty awesome in any character he portrays, he really brings them to life.
Yeah i agree ! Alfie and as Delaney in the masterpiece „Taboo“ if you don‘t know that , you will love it.
Can you please do a video on the late great Norm Macdonald!!
Yes
Yes!!!
Norm had transcending confidence.
That's a great idea and a video I'd definitely watch
Normy normy normy!
hockey, Normie!
The 3 second rule helps alot. I used to just pop off with my first verbal jab just to prove they didn’t want to argue with me. Over time, I realized I didnt want to win that way. Staying calm, pausing and saying what needs to be said, not what I want to say. Im the type of guy that doesn’t talk much, I’ll show interest in the convo, but not much banter. Then when i speak up, even to interrupt, my words hold more value with their unsaturated rarity. I commanded respect from top level professionals when I knew i was in the right. Dont be a victim, speak up, clearly.
"pop off with my first verbal jab just to prove they didn’t want to argue with me."
How old were these people you were 'proving' this to?
@@jaigi2 Yeah, that was clever. Took him 4 seconds to come up with it too. lol
You've got it all now mate.
No further need to convince us how impressive you think you are.
Carry on.
>Im the type of guy that doesn’t talk much, I’ll show interest in the convo, but not much banter. Then when i speak up, even to interrupt, my words hold more value
Not really. I've know a lot of men like you and when they finally speak people just say "who tf rattled his cage" then everyone laughs and the group moves one while mister shy and enlightened goes back to being ignored.
@@montybarrington2732 You misunderstood my comment. I speak up a lot actually. I say what others wont. I just don’t need to use a lot of extra time repeating myself. Being the loudest person in the room doesn’t make you right. I’m the guy who asks why you wont stand up for yourself, not someone who just speaks up to whine.
Sounds like you need better friends.
As someone who has spent thirty years in public service jobs, I've had numerous opportunities to use such tactics. They definitely work. When dealing with rude, angry people it pays to be cautious with them. Remain calm and collected always.
A favorite of mine when dealing with angry customers is to talk calmly, slowly and the more they scream the lower i get my voice. If they interrupt I let them talk then go back to repeat the same sentence I was trying to say before from the beggining.
And if they talk too loud I make a face like I have a headache and tilt my head, close my eyes for 2 seconds then go back to my original point.
@@ChaosAngel667 😂
Well, if you were in government work, you probably deserved everything you got
Great content. 1) when you pause it makes the other person feel you are thinking about their feelings or request, giving them some hope. Works in many situations. When you react immediately it makes a person feel as though you weren’t listening at all and that you were just waiting to say what you wanted to say.
“I started my life with a single absolute: that the world was mine to shape in the image of my highest values and never to be given up to a lesser standard, no matter how long or hard the struggle.”
Ayn Rand
Both Tommy and Alfie always command attention and respect when in any place but in completely different ways. Tommy is calm, calculating, and unreactive while Alfie is loud, unpredictable, and intimidating.
The one thing both share in common is intelligence.
ARFUR SHALOM
thats because tommy is a sigma alfie is an alpha
@@vincentloh3709 lol gtoh
@@nulle.k thats the simplest difference between them u fool
'The one thing both share in common is intelligence.' - And the fact that they are actors who have learned lines written by someone else.
After watching Charlie's video with Graham I begin to respect this channel more for not only focusing on monetary reasons
Not dropping your eye contact when someone interrupts sounds like the most respectful and sweet thing ever.
People break eye contact and get distracted all the time in the middle of a conversation with me. Not much are more disrespectful than that. While it's on me to earn more respect too, it'd do them good to know these things.
Thanks for sharing and adding value to my day.
wtf u mean "value"? xDD wats dat mean?!!
the value and direct your attention one is a very good one. ive seen it and used it first hand and its amazing
Remember: women want
The authority of men
The benefits of being a woman
AND
the accountability of children
I looked at this looking to learn, which I did, but noticed that there were a few things I study and do now. Love it
Some great content and ideas. Also, how you use your voice to attract and engage is also key.
Having to do with eye contact and eye direction: While walking towards any location, stare directly at the path you are going to take. People will move out of your way because they see that you have a purpose and a clear mode of direction. It's like parting the Red Sea.
I use this daily for work and it helps wonders especially in crowded areas as most people are looking around, down on their phones, or otherwise not sure where to go.
I worked in a tough area, until after 12 midnight, always walked with strong purpose, steely eyes. No one came near me!
Watch Clint Eastwood!
i do this too!! like a lot, even when i’m just walking on the streets and yk streets here in the philippines are very crowded most of the times and people would avoid my direction when they see me walking straight ahead with my head up high and my eyes to the front, mind you, i’m a woman and only 4’11 (yes i’m small af) but it does work!! even middle aged guys here that usually catcalls women gets silent when i walk past them and let me tell you, it brings me so much confidence 😩✨
(sorry if i have grammar mistakes, english is not my first language)
I am still in school and I don't use this in order to look more outgoing and practice holding eye contact. But when I need to get somewhere now, I surely will employ this method
Don't get mad when it doesn't always work.
@@billh.1940
Tom Hardy is so entertaining to watch on screen. Enjoy all the characters he portrays from Mad Max to Bane, Black Hawk Down, and my favorite of his; Taboo
I have been waiting for these videos on tommy😍😍
I've learned all of these through Psychology years ago! I can tell you this is absolutely true!!!
Obsessed about your channel guys thanks! Can you make a video about fluently speaking and staying on point when you are telling something. You never ramble and always on the right track when you are speaking it makes me think that you might be using a prompter actually 🙈 i know youtube videos are mostly scripted but i would appreciate any advise on this topic! In my videos i always use cuts in order to make the whole thing more fluent 😂 and also how to be “quick witted” could be a topic thanks in advance 🙏🏼Greetings from Turkiye 🙋🏻♀️
"tell the truth and then you don't have to remember anything" is what I say to my friends about honesty
“If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.” ― Mark Twain: Motivational Notebook, Journal, Diary
Yes in most situations you only have to tell the truth once but a lie will have to be repeated.
Need a good memory to be a good liar
thanks for preparing this kind of contents 🙏
Thanks for all tips.
Bit late to the party but, hey, all that matters is that I'm in the right spot! Came here for the Peaky Blinders connection but stayed for the impressively expert analysis and presentation.
Oh, and I'm joining the channel for much the same reasons. Keep up the great work!
I love Tom Hardy's acting. That "f**kin' ell look at that" when Arthur threatened him was hilarious and felt like such a real, raw, reaction.
Covered my favorite scene of the show in the first minute 🔥🔥
This channel is my absolute go to for honing my charisma. The material is so extremely valuable and well put together. I was able to take something that was stressful before, like job interviews, and make it something I can genuinely feel comfortable about. This content was able to help me tease out a quality in myself that I now consider to be one of my greatest strengths. So, thank you! Keep up the good work!
'This channel is my absolute go to for honing my charisma.' - But the fact that you have to use a RUclips video to develop 'charisma' shows you have none and never will. Anyone with genuine personality can always see through an adolescent who has tried to learn the tricks.
You cant 'learn' charisma hahahah
If you have ever met SAS soldiers you will understand how this works. They are calm, never shout, are fully ready to deliver overwhelming force but do it very controlled.
Many years ago I took a job as an engineering area manager in the UK. My boss had this trait where he would do just this...go silent for several seconds rather than immediately respond. It earned him the nickname of "Antichrist" with the other area managers. It was extremely off putting in meetings & definitely works to get someone rattled!
wow, sounds about right. I never knew why I did these things. thank you.
I had to watch this. Can't wait to Monday
One important thing to know here. In other videos handling more physical confrontations.
If the person you are talking to is breaking conversation and eye contact and moves their eyes down to one side (noticed right side is more common) it is a good chance they will chose to attack you. By disengaging and distancing themselves for the conversation they give away that they plan another approach to the ongoing conflict. This has saved me from getting punched in the mouth several times.
Many spend time talking as they want to be heard but in a conflict I rather let my opponent talk and even ask questions as they won't think of attacking you when they're thinking of the next thing to say. There are of course exceptions but then it's most likely a planned attack to begin with so always be aware of your surroundings and keep distance.
Yeah...I hate holiday family gatherings too. They always go this way for some reason towards the end of my bottle of tequila.
A punch is often immediately proceeded by a quick glance in the direction the punch will come from.
When someone gets really mad or angry at me, I calmly say: "I love people who show passion", it usually disarms them and gives me time to think about my next move.
Then how many smack you? Just curious cause that can come off as smug not confident. Be careful how you respond to someone angry. Sometimes your attempt to disarm can just piss them off more.
@@yoshijb9428 or a broken jaw
@@macb124 exactly my point.
@@yoshijb9428 well yeah but him/her hitting is just wrong and shows even more weakness, and he would probably regret it later. So take the hit!
There’s this old saying where I’m from “I’d rather take a sore face than a red face” meaning you’d rather face the challenge of a fight that be embarrassed (red face) for walking away from the fight. When you grow up with that psychology, these tips seem ridiculous. There was also the fact that if you went home beat up your dad would tell you go back & finish it or slap you for getting a kicking. Characters like Tommy Shelby, Alfie Solomons are products of their environments, not to mention they’re fuckin actors. In an actual argument, no one ever lets anyone get their point across. There’s no cue just ppl getting louder & cheekier till someone throws a punch. It’s not something you can adapt to ppl, you learn it cos it’s your real life.
When managing emotional response during conflict, there's a fine line between poise and restraint...and Psychopathy. I agree with the rest.
Just stumbled across this page and I'm glad I did...
"Don't apologize just to avoid conflict." If you feel that you're often in this situation, it's time to drop those people anyway.
I believe you have missed the point. Solid advice, though.
@@harleighworkman7253i think he got the point very well.
@bodosam7798 It's scary how much people take things out of context to prove a point. makes things so conveluted, to an extent that the original point is lost.
Good examples of this are the LGBTQ community, religious finatics, the telephone game, and the comment above.
#3 is the one that gets people tripping. When someone tries to take away from what you want to discuss and you take that bait or even consider it, they will subconsciously not respect what you say.
great explanation!🎉
Every time I watch one of these, I find that I already do these things. Just live and adapt people, these results are just a natural result of learning through conflicts.
That long bit about confidence... one thing that was pointed to, but never once mentioned is called integrity. Standing behind the right thing whether you've enabled it or not, yeah, integrity. It's an extremely important factor in life that has been gasping for breath and nearing death quicker and quicker by the day. I'm not surprised, considering the state of humanity, that it wasn't named.
Direct eye contact states you are willing to listen. People that eye pierce while you eye engage have something to hide or a different motive. Easy side thrust of the eyes is an easy way to disengage their thoughts and allow you to get a thought in. Thank you for your vids and keep them up, please.
How do you stay non attached, and centered when holding eye contact? I struggle with boundaries between self and others, and often in life feeling scattered and overstimulated.
Já ti přece knihu dal! Vsadím se, že jsi ji nečetl! Tam je spousta zajímavých informací! Fakt.
that aweseome tips. thank you sir
That was fun. Take it from me, these things do work in life or death situations. Those themselves build confidence to know you're ok however it plays out. Principles are dying out, as quickly as mutual respect; living by them gives everyone around confidence in you.
Not saying I did everything right but I recently got in an argument with somebody over something that I perceived to be trivial applying this video to my actions in the situation I’m glad to know that I at least appeared confident well trying to communicate that I no longer wanted to waste my time on a friendship with them
Forget that person 1v1 them
Shalom arfur
I love Alfie he is such a boss.
Great video guys!!!
Could you make similar video, but for conversations over the phone, when people cannot see you?
A few years ago back in NYC, I was droping off my ex at her place after a movie. As I headed home a guy pulled a gun on me and tried to rob me. I had only a 20$ on me and thought if he got pissed off I was dead. I reminded calm and collected, and started a dialog. Guy responded and we spent the next 20 or so minutes talking about how F---Ed up life had gotten.
I remember these words clearly "I was going to rob you, but there's something different about you and it doesn't feel right". He started to walk away and I told him to hold up and gave him the $20.
I of course called the cops right after. I got lucky but he still had weapon and was ready to commit a crime. I hope he decided to not do it anymore. Times are tough but we shouldn't be in a position to harm others just to live.
Anywho, 580 comments I doubt this will even get looked at, but I was reminded of that day when he was calm and honest with a gun in his face. Feel like it might be harder to lie and convince someone with a gun on you when the person you are lying to can just end your life if they feel wronged.
That's a great story brother
Well done
You fricking chad lol
Excellently played if true.
If not Excellent story.
Why would you give him the $20 THEN call the cops on him? Until he had the $20 your version of events was hearsay at best but with him in possession of your $20 your story has a little more credibility meaning you essentially set him up.
@@Random-sk6hmI was kinda thinking that! Why give him a score then grass him in anyway. Your twenty quid would’ve ended up in evidence. I wouldn’t even pick him up in a line up then get the bastard when he left the cop shop..…without his gun lol
I didn't realize that I already use the 3-4 second rule. And that I speak slowly at my own pace. I don't do this in intense conversation, I do this all the time. No wonder people take me way to seriously
Some good stuff in here sir
Cant believe I watched this for 6 minutes before realising I was watching an ad... Great job!
5:36 I remember when our boss had to mediate me and my collegue about having my collegue aren't recieved a set of copies of booklet for distribution to a certain number of stores. I am shocked that she had to spend a narrow time alloted to us instead of finding ways to cope up with the demand. She kept insisting that I should alloted her a sets of copies of that reason. At that time I am busy counting and binding booklets to be delivered to my own intended group of stores. I said in the mediation, I would alloted a sets of booklets to you first even if am left behind because you are assigned to those big stores BUT you aren't there at that time...so what should I do? I'll wait for her presence to come to our facility just give to what she want? And I said, No! I would rather give it to my assigned stores in order to get their copies. And my boss looked at me, and said you should appologize, in my mind "what the heck I am appologizing for?" In that moment I looked my boss her eyes evading her command. Then my boss concluded that I am a hard headed employee, then I felt puzzled by her utterance and left me speechless. To break the hiatus, I looked my phone then I said, excuse me I have a deliver to be taken with. Up until now my relationship to them revolves on work related and now I felt invinsible to them but that's ok for me at least.🙂
While I hope to apply these lessons for personal reasons, they work great when it comes to customer service. Still, I to develop those skills in my profession over time. But when I have had to "go off" on a customer, I never raise my voice, and use pick apart the irate customer's counter-argument (if any). The moment profanity is used against me, that's when I know I "won". At that point, my typical response is to point out their crude-ness before telling them that they can call back when they behave themselves. Works every time.
all that for an add, well done, you got me
Tak je to jasný, zase jsi sjetej :D
I've been doing most of this gestures since I was young, like it was naturally in my personality, maybe this is the reason why I always been chosen to be a leader in a group, tbh I don't want to lead people or tell someone what to do and lastly I hate responsibility.
but yes I can handle stressful situations where others go blank.
I've been Team leader,Venue Head, supervisor, manager before I turned 27, but I still prefer more like a non-leading solitary role.
im the opposite, i dont follow anyone nor want anyone to follow me, i do my own thing.
stop dreaming and wake up.
@@aneeshdev1300 yeah thank you i woke up and i quit my job it's too stressful handling people for me not worth It.
Sound little like people on reality show. S “ when I walk I the room I’m the alpha. Don’t want To be but my mom noticed that also.
Please make such a video on Raymond Reddington (The Blacklist).
Great help . . . very good .
The mental dual between Alfie and Tommy at the desk was the greatest TV ive seen since Walt on Breaking Bad avoided getting killed by Mike in Breaking Bad the scene where Gail got murdered instead it was literally that tense.
Any peaky blinders videos will always teach us much more in life than any other Movies 🍿🧠👁
Being unwaveringly honest has more upside than just letting you have some upper hand in a conflict or some charisma in social situations.
Great vid
Wondered if you could analyze Jeff Goldblum unique charisma
I never heard Of this this show or saw it but it interested and great video
My older brother enjoyed accepting a bully's challenge with a few, well chosen words. My favorite was when he would get face to face, speak in a low voice, and reply "I can't stop you from trying but I'll break you of the habit."
My dad used to scream at me sometimes and expected an instant response because he knew I was just a scared little boy. Today when someone asks me a question, I pause and respond in my own time. Nobody tells me at what moment I should speak now.
Cool! I really didn't notice but I used these methods/techniques in handling difficult clients. I really agreed on not you're sorry when you do not meant it.
Great video
To the *incredible person* seeing this, I wish you all the best in life❤ don't over blame yourself, accept things and go forward. Don't let others define what “success” is for you. Get up, learn the skills needed and get after it, all the keys to a happy life is in your hands. Keep pushing.
Thanks friend.
Thank you. I needed to hear this.
“The only thing we can take for granted is the present”
Marcus Aurelius
Meditations
Just here to share some things; knowledge cant be lost, time is gold, and let me share a quick motivational quote :) "I've never seen a strong man with an easy past"
Thanks for your time and have a good one :)
Knowledge is lost all the time at school. But good quote
@@zakosist yeah the quote is really good
Cool one! Thanks
One to remember when the world spins out of control and you're scared and you don't know which way to go - 'Take the centre.'
Hard times make hard men. Hard men maje good times. Good times make soft men. Soft men make hard times.
Always speak your truth. The other person's response to your truth will not change your truth
Very good 😊
I can see the 3 second rule being helpful but as I grew up with multiple siblings who were older and a neighbourhood who has respect for my older siblings I became a target.
The 3 second rule never really worked in my situations imo but not to say I didn't use it as a dramatic pause. But I gained way more respect and friends by having a quick response and a witty one at that. Half of the time having a sarcastic demeanor or tone was way more effective
sarcasm and quick wit both require very high cognitive ability (especially combined) therefore it means something to people who can recognize and understand that. Everyone is capable of silence, so it helps, but only so far.
Because you’re dealing with people with fake aggressive behavior or kid like behavior……when it comes to dealing with women or corporate setting the pause works every time
Can you do a modern interpretation of Sunzi's The art of war? What lessons can we use for our everyday life/conflicts?
Who is Sunzi?
@@koopmalverde6486 philosopher and war strategist. His work is one of the most known in the world
@@user-fr8xv9gz7e *sun tsu
I’ve had people try to intimidate me with eye contact, only to hold it for too long as you said. They just looked ridiculous, especially in the cases when it wasn’t even a serious matter.
Good info
I have confidence when faced with real danger, I’ve had people hold guns to my head more than I care to say. On the other hand, I get extremely anxious in normal conversations.
Just always show respect but when someone is arrogant to you, show him your calmness.
Cheers mate, greetings from Dagestan
I love this channel
Respect is created through long term credibility.
You hit the nail on the head, no need for psychological tricks that are themselves masking deficiencies and are almost impossible to pull off
Two beta males coping. It's a hard life.
@@anotheryoutubeaccount5259 You are not a beta?
@@anotheryoutubeaccount5259
And I guess you're just perusing self-help videos for research purposes..?
@PeteFromSalesDepartment Sure, why not. I like perusing.
Could you make videos on how to deal with or put limits/set boundaries on narcissistic, self-centered, egotistical, manipulative and toxic people, please?
Great channel! All the best!
super awesome video bro :O :D
This guy makes u acknowledge any form of Insecurities that exists, makes it relate to u, with the fact that how u can tackle it. but before u know it completely, or are willing to know more of it now, he Sells his Program at that exact same point.
~Just appreciating the marketing efforts. ~
Being a bit mental also helps when applying these tips.
Fantastic video!
Well done lad
Knowing number 4 may have saved my marriage lol
I always took the blame eventually in order to end the argument, and it seems I helped create a monster
My experience is that apologizing if I am wrong does deescalate and saves my integrity. The best tactic I have found for addressing when someone wrongs me is to have them swap roles with me and tell me how they would feel as the recipient while maintaining eye contact the entire time.
I came to tell you there is no "tricks" you have to work on your self by putting yourself in challenging situations and build experience.
@King Apri - this!
But also some people may have more sociopathic tendencies than others, and they will cope with all of it quite easy. In fact they will feel like fish in a water in some scenarios.
Applicable to the office/corporate life too of course, and also on the other extreme, to some dangerous places in some cities around the world.
Edit: grammar/spelling
Good one
got to love how it's one of those websites that doesn't tell you anything about the program or price...just a bunch of people telling you how good it was until you sign up for somethingthe video Awesome by the way!
Norm Macdonald !!
The thing is, anyone who is genuinely confident sees through these little learned tricks and despises the person using them even more. This is clearly something for adolescents.
The real thing is, anyone who is really confident doesn't need to denigrate the efforts of others to do and be better. Ever.
Incredible amount of value in Peaky Blinders!
Good advice.
Rolling my eyes. No wonder it's harder every day to find good people, everyone and their 3 yr old sister is running an online store, pretending to be something there are not, or blaming anyone and everyone else for their poor choices.
Hey guys can y'all please, please do a video on James Spader's character of Raymond “Red” Reddington from The Blacklist, i mean not only is he a total badass but he's also super smart and confident and doesn't care what others think of him at all, he would be great to do a video on i think.
That’s a good one
@@georgemuhoro Thanks 😉
Great idea. The thing I like about him is his ability to always have the conversation he wants to have. For example, he rarely answers a question from someone when it doesn't align with his goals for the meeting. Instead he briefly acknowledges it and then bridges to a more relevant point.
I'm watching this now, thanks.
The only two questions you need to ask yourelf are " how far am I willing to go and how far is he willing to go." Sometimes it's best to walk away, or you might end up wearing a grass coat and a headstone for a hat.
I'm speaking from real life experiences.
Assess the situation and respect when it's smart to step down. You'll live longer.
yeh what we see in movies is make believe, not really the place to take serious life lessons. A quick way to get respect is to floor the other guy, in a 1:1. - not good, it's the only way some people understand. I think there's different "respect" for different situations, not all are violent intent.