Kevin already IS abusive. He manipulates her, he gaslights her, he isolates her from her friends so she has no one to turn to but her, he's financially abusive, he got her FIRED from a job because he was jealous, a job that was much better than working at a liquor store, probably ruining her career. Just because he doesn't hit her doesn't mean he's not abusive.
Yeah I was surprised by that line in this video as well. The whole point of the sitcom sequences is that it's easy for everyone around her to shrug off all the ACTUALLY sinister/abusive/neglectful behavior because he behaves like a manchild. As a product of a poor white New England home myself, this is SO accurate to how many family dynamics work. It was like this for basically every adult couple I knew as a kid.
And she acts like she is ok with it in the sitcom parts. She plays along, makes jokes, witty remarks and most importantly STAYS WITH HIM. Sorry but people are still a bit accountable for their own lives.
@@Tazzie1312 No, it's not. It's about taking responsibility for your life. Go if you don't like something. She would be better off without him anyways.
@@squattingheads Because then you wouldn't have a show. Likewise, this is what real life is like. Most people know what they need to do to improve their lives but have all sorts of different obstacles in the form of their economic, social, familial situations or their own psychology. Frankly, unless your life is perfect, I'm sure anyone could tell you how to solve your problems. If human's were like computers and we could simply input solutions to problems which would then be executed without conflict, we would have no art, drama or story telling traditions at all.
She is not having a mental breakdown. She’s traumatized. This show is about narcissistic abuse. A narcissist is seen as charismatic and often a pillar of the community to the outside world. But is an abusive monster to the victim. It’s often not physical abuse. It’s psychological torture. And unfortunately society doesn’t recognize this type of abuse for what it is. For victims of this type of abuse, it’s literally like living in two different worlds. It’s so difficult to get someone to believe you. And when you start to fight back, the narcissist calls you crazy and smears you to the outside world and, more often than not, the world believes the abuser.
Right?! A few people are going on about she should just leave. Put aside the fact that he's made her completely financially dependent on him and sabotages anything she discovers which makes her happy or might be a viable way of self improvement or development; the people who are closest to her would drag her through the mud for leaving. Her own aunt or whoever that convenience store lady is completely sides with kevin, she has no friends of her own.. Who does she have to help her through this? She could make a plan to leave, but without money she's not getting far. A man like kevin is also not going to make divorce easy. All the women I know who have divorced their husbands said it was long and painful because their exes made it deliberately hard. Even doing something like a no fault divorce. The whole "maybe she's delusional" take is a bit annoying because I think the sitcom style is more an allegory of how abusive people construct their worlds. Surrounding themselves by people who are sympathetic and supportive of them while choking any sense of autonomy and self esteem out of their victims.
@@Misstressofdons plenty of people find ways out of situations worse than this, she also chose him when she married him. This is stupid. Imagine having abusive parents, where you literally have no choice then expecting to sympathize with some dumb ass that chose a husband poorly. Get a grip
The show’s creator said that we don’t see Kevin through the single-camera drama setting because *he* never has to actually engage with his life in a way that’s more substantial than his colourful and eternally cheery 2-camera sitcome setting “he never has to deal with life in that way. He gets this multi-cam audience cheering him on, calling him a boy until he's 60 years old, and just allowing him to do his destructive bullshit without ever calling him out on it.”
She also said that both settings are part of the shows “reality”, so it’s not just something that Allison is using to cope, the world is a sitcom around Kevin because everyone around him accommodates his behaviour in that way! (spoiler ahead) We see that it’s really only Kevin that has that effect the shows world when at the last few minutes of the finale we get to see Neil in the single-camera set up
That’s how I understood it too. More about the dominance Kevin has over a room which somewhat forces his perspective of himself as the protagonist of a sitcom on everybody else.
@@evilhag1162 but there was sitcoms scenes in which Kevin wasn't present,only Neil. so for me it was more like Patty/Ally drag Neil out of that "false" reality
I'm halfway through the first episode and Kevin is already abusive. "Getting to" throw a party for his boss on HER anniversary, her dream being to pour HIM a beer at a new house, making breakfast for him and him complaining about the garnish, doing laundy while he's playing beer pong in the living room, having to give him instructions on what to get as an anniversary gift... This is not her having mental problems, it's him and everyone who surrounds them thinking that this relationship is normal that's the problem. It's not a coping mechanism either, it's the exact same relationship showed from their different perspectives. Having someone do all the housework, serve you and also bring money home is absolutely ideal, everything is cool, everyone is happy, like a sitcom. Having to do all the housework, cook for and pick up after someone, and have a job on top of all that is EXHAUSTING, everything is harder and darker, like a drama.
I think the story is a horror. The universe itself bends to accommodate Kevin. Everyone else loves and respects him. So every attempt Alison makes to leave or harm him in anyway is resisted by reality itself. Take away that supernatural layer though, and it's still a horror because Alison is trapped in an abusive marriage and has virtually no support. Every day of her life is a nightmare and she has this numb acceptance of parts of it as the only way she can cope. Even if you don't think Alison isn't a good person, you should still be rooting for her because she deserves to leave and have her own life. She's suffered a decade of being married to an abusive man-child, she deserves relief.
@@shawnkilpatrick4839built by herself in what way? The shows premise started because they have no savings because he spent it. He doesn’t work as hard as she does, he’s always on the verge of being fired. His solutions to HIS problems impact other people significantly.
This series reminds me of Everybody Loves Raymond. Title says it all. While his wife Debra is always the angry, “unreasonable”, buzzkill, wife. Everything he does is exactly like what Kevin did. I remember one episode where he and his brother robert sabotaged Robert’s wedding invitations so they don’t need to help up with the preparations. Pretty much every episode was like that. And when Debra gets mad, Raymond will blame it on her period “it’s that time of the month again huh”. Lol
Your comment is a year old but it's exactly what is going on. They are pretty much making fun of the way sitcoms treat the wives. This show is pretty cool!
There’s a difference though, Ray is just as cynical as she is. This show is more along the lines of the husband is the typical loud comedy character that is supposed to be lovable to the audience for his typical guy antics
So not only has this comment aged like a fine wine given how the show ends, but I also remembered the episode where it was revealed that he taped Super Bowl XXV over their wedding tape, because it was “for his job”. Nowadays, I see that and I’m like “you couldn’t wait until 2005 to watch it on the internet for free?”
Allison said something after the cell phone incident..."He doesn't expect the world to turn around him, he demands it". Yep, know some men like this. Like a booger you can't get rid of.
Well, maybe Kevin is worse in reality, but Sitcom Kevin is already extremely abusive : he took her money for school, he humiliates her daily, he never cares about her, he despises her, he lets his friends and dad insult her... isn't that enough ?
Apparently not enough to make her leave years ago. I feel like half the audience would help her bury a body which makes them at least as bad as Kevin is.
@@shawnkilpatrick4839he wouldn’t let her leave easily, she knew that. It’s reactive abuse. Not so much on her dramatic ideas to get away, but the fact he wouldn’t let her and PROVED it at the end.
i love that you like it, and i dare say the parts you don't quite get about it, are parts 'made for' women. women who have been living this double life through no choice of their own. taught to take the bare minimum and be thankful for it. the world is made for kevins and their comfort, with the person paying for it often being the alysons. i wasn't confused about the split filming at all, i've lived it for 27 years. I'd say the sitcom view isn't alyson's coping method, but how kevin frames his antics that she has no ability to challenge or reframe. why? because he's the main character and she's just the supporting character. in sitcoms, but also in this patriarical society. i come from an emotionally abusive family and literally every relationship in it looks like this one. the woman defers to the man and is always blamed for everything, whereas the man gets every benefit of the doubt, regardless of how harmful or malicious his actions were. the house revolves around his perspective and feelings, while everything else gets disregarded.
Wow that’s some great insight 😦 I also didn’t think it was a coping mechanism, rather Alison having her perspective overshadowed and dominated by Kevin
marriage is no choice? staying is no choice? Not saying smth is no choice? The dude is harmless, non threatning nd WAAAAAAAY dumb. At what point does responsibility start? When a car comes at you with 5mi per hour from a mile away and you dont get out of the way? Its maybe a bit your own fault?!
@@squattingheads he’s not not harmless, he called the police and reported his car as stolen when he knew Allison had it just because she didn’t answer a call when he wanted to ask her something. He got her fired from a job she loved and saw potential in because he was jealous of her boss. He spent all their savings on sports memorabilia without telling her. He insisted that he be in charge of the bank account because “she’s terrible with money”, but the real reason was so he could buy whatever he wanted without any regards for her future plans. He continually ruins her plans, her clothes, her things. He is not harmless
What I like about the format is that it shows that what we often used in the past as fodder for humor in our sitcoms is actually really terrible behavior, and that if it were really what you experienced in your life it would be hell. For example Ross on friends. He’s supposed to be the ideal love interest that we all want to champion, but in reality his behavior is really unhealthy and at times abusive toward Rachel and Monica, but it’s laughed off and accepted as “humor” instead of damaging to relationships. I love this platform, it’s a real thinker. I also love your theory about her using the sitcom mode as a coping mechanism.
@@arain764niara Many of the people bashing it don't get it. I've heard people get mad at the laugh track and say "the jokes aren't that funny, they're stupid", but that's the whole point.
3:21 I don't think you comprehend what "abusive" means. Someone doesn't need to experience physical violence in order to be a victim of abuse. There are many forms of abuse and what Kevin does is already abusive. There's the emotional and mental abuse, where he manipulates and gaslights her, patronizes her and puts her down, and shatters her self-esteem. He talks to her like she's stupid and doesn't know any better. He got her fired from a job because he thought she was cheating on him. He isolates her so that she doesn't have any friends or a support system. There's the financial abuse where he not only controls the money, but spends it all so they're broke. These are all tactics used by abusers in an attempt to control their partner and to ensure their partner will be totally dependent on them and won't leave. This is abuse.
Just finished the first season and to me, the sitcom _reality_ *is not* Allison's coping mechanism to the abuse she is clearly going through _but a place_ where Kevin is the Architect. And if we amplify this on a larger scale (perhaps global?) The sitcom world could easily be seen as an allegory of the patriarchal system *we all live in* because Kevin's dominance goes beyond his home since he had freedom to take the disgusting behavior he does at home _to public places,_ and to make the situation worse than it already is, Kevin gets nothing but praise and laughs for acting like that. The episode called "Fixed" did a great job showing this. As a woman I think it was brilliant to show how abusive relationships works, and how the patriarchal system enables and reinforces this all through the lens of a sitcom, because just as it happens in sitcoms, in modern society everything around women (opinions, dreams, safety) are often seen as something to laugh for, and to be humiliated for. All this so dudes like Kevin can enjoy a world that exist to please them at the expense of the women they destroy.
I have an alternate theory. That Kevin controls Sitcom World. Only time we ever see him in the real world is when Allison breaks a bottle. Only for one of the others to say something funny and bring it back. Yet it only becomes real world when he leaves the room. It switched briefly because he was shocked that his "perfect wife" would do something "unpleasant". She basically took control of the world for a brief moment.
I think the catalyst isn't bottles breaking per se but blood. The only times we see the sitcom facade break with the main 3 men on screen is when there's blood (admittedly both after smashed glass). Plus the second instance of blood has a male character swearing in the real world which obviously doesn't happen in the sitcom world
@@harryseru7225 i thought that at first but there have been a number of sitcoms that have shown blood in both gruesome and hilarious ways. The main exsmple for the former is when Charlie walked into a glass door on two and a half men. Whereas then latter had Penn and Teller do an over the top bleeding session on the Drew Carrey show. In both instances here though, the blood and cussing are only shown after the shift already happens and the shift starts when the sound of glass is heard breaking loudly.
Except weirdly for the first time in decades it actually is an up and coming city! .. but that’s only because Boston is becoming ridiculously expensive to live in and everyone is moving to Worcester .. so now they’re kind of turning Worcester into mini Boston I guess… it’s got pros and cons for sure
I also love how they shot this show by having wide panels/composition and more saturation during the sitcom parts but immediately going to a more desaturated and compressed composition- almost as if it’s showing how Allison feels trapped in a box whilst Kevin is living more happily on the outside doing whatever he pleases. I love it when shows do stuff like this because it helps show a much bigger contrast between characters and helps pushes the main conflict “forward” and how someone could be almost completely oblivious to the world around them but still affect others immensely
It may also be portrayed the way it is to have us reconsider the troupes in most sitcoms. The husbands in questions tend to be self-centered and stupid. I can't think of all of the times when I have checked into a sitcom just to wonder WHY these woman would be with these men. It is a question worth asking.
There is no question to be asked, the sitcoms are written by gay men who have no idea of family life and are trying to present to you a picture. If you fall for it you are falling for someone else's idea of what a family is supposed to be like. Very much like the idiots that fall for others' facebook/instagram stories and think thats how life is supposed to be like when those carefully filter out the bad parts of their day. Anyway, TV rots your brain, whether its this show or any other, the writers of this show are rottenbrains who fail to realize that while most sitcoms are unrealistic, it is not for the reasons they think.
something about this show that really got me hooked was the split perception. I think it shows she masks for everyone around her but when she leaves the room she takes it off. I haven’t gotten to far but honestly I think it’s a good play on a sitcom and drama mix
It's one story of a small town abusive relationship from two perspectives. Hers and his. He's just having fun and dealing with all her "issues" (never satisfied, always drama, amirite, guys?), while she's not allowed to drive (even though she's never had an accident, while he has), have friends of her own (even though his are always getting him into trouble), manage money (he wastes it on bad investments or dumb purchases) , go out of town without him calling the cops when she doesn't answer her phone, have a job of her choosing (because he gets an employee discount at the liquor store). Thank goodness they haven't had kids or she would be even more tied to this situation.
DUDE, I have some thoughts about your sit-com theory! Looking at it as a coping mechanism makes a lot of sense for how I'd been looking at Kevin through this lens. That moment Kevin let some whack-job assist in interrogating his wife? Bone-chilling once removed from the sit-com context. My husband and I were freaking ourselves out over him saying that he "demands loyalty."
Honestly, the scene with the bottle breaking and Allison hurt her hand got to me. Like, your wife is hurt and bleeding, she looks sick and out of it, and you want to make a fucking period joke?
They actually made a whole Everybody Loves Raymond episode around Debra's PMS. He wanted her to take a pill to make it better. This show has changed the way I look at the old shows including All in the Family.
@@annaiorio4543 You could take "All in the Family" at face value and think Archie was a monster. I mean he verbally abused everybody in his house. Yeah, he took care of his son-in-law and daughter while they went to school, that was generous of him, but that didn't give him the right to call them names and mock them constantly. He certainly didn't have the right to belittle Edith's intelligence by calling her a "dingbat." And that's not even going into all the ignorance and racism. Yeah, Archie Bunker had his good qualities, but make no mistake, he wasn't a working class hero, he was an asshole.
Given it occurs in the first episode, I don’t think it’s a spoiler to say she plots to kill him after the first episode. This fact is both explained by and explains the show as a response to Kevin Can Wait, specifically, as well as King of Queens and others in the sub genre. In Kevin Can Wait, the wife dies after the first season, and the characters apparently act like they don’t care and her life didn’t matter. The wife’s response of plotting to kill Kevin rather than just get a divorce only makes sense when understood as a response to this specific ‘incidental’ plot point in Kevin Can Wait, which apparently enraged KCFH’s creators into developing the idea for the series. (In real life it’s more common for the wife than the husband to initiate divorce proceedings, so this kind of marital dissatisfaction is common even if the solution is not!)
I’m laughing because they actually finally re-did Kelley Square about a year ago, they turned it into a rotary because of the Woo-Sox. This seems cool, I’ll have to give it a watch!
Thank you so much for making this video! I'd never heard of this show and had no idea what this video would be about, but I paused at 0:42 because you'd sold me on it that fast! I immediately binged the whole season!
What a great video! As the other commenters have already mentioned, thank you for bringing more attention to this wonderful show! Maybe soon it'll finally get more of the attention it deserves, but seems that it's likely to be one of those that gets slept on for awhile until eventually people realize it exists and discover how well crafted & unique the show truly is. That said, I'm slightly worried it'll be slept on for slightly too long, resulting in a scenario where it's in discussions to be cancelled, and/or gets cancelled due to lower viewership, but I really hope not as would be devastating to lose another high quality show to lack of awareness.
This show actually made me grateful to have such an amazing father....he has a similar body type like kevin (but is less than him) but he uses being goofy and funny for good reasons...and he is really sensible and hopes I have a great future ahead and become independent and believe in myself. And people even respect him bc he is a good person genuinely and is hard working💞💞💞💞
Checking in now that this is on Netflix and everyone is discovering it. Let’s update this video. In the finale, Kevin does enter the drama/non-sitcom world. It’s here that we see the full Kevin, the non-sanitized-with-a-laugh-track Kevin, which is frightening. It makes you reexamine previous moments of things Kevin said, but delivered in the anger and tone on display in that final scene. So, no… she’s not having a breakdown. She’s realizing that Kevin is abusive.
The sitcom parts are Kevin's perspective. He views all the jokes and everything he puts on Allison as light hearted fun. He is self-absorbed, and doesn't take the time to think about his actions affect her or others. It's all light hearted adult antics. He doesn't think it consider that he is causing actual harm. Then we switch to her perspective when he's gone. The dog scene really broke my heart.
Your voice is weirdly relaxing. Also I like your review of the show and characterization of Alison. She’s a really interesting character because of how she tries to take control of her life within a show built with sitcom tropes. Can’t wait for season 2!
I think you hit the nail on the head. I was a victim of DV and this is often how I would cope, coming up with a head-canon type reality to keep myself from having a complete breakdown.
I like how many people take that old trope so seriously. I saw someone in the comments say "those sitcoms are what make women stay in abusive and horrible relationships." It doesn't make sense. The whole point of those sitcoms are to show a family so removed from reality they're entertaining but but real enough in some instances that the characters portray real life family values. In Married with Children the whole family is dysfunctional, not just Al. Same with King of Queens, Everybody Loves Raymond, and so fourth. None of those characters are truly in line with reality. Sure, they have some realism in some aspects of their traits, but overall we shouldn't look to them for how to live life. The reason the families in those shows do work even though their so dysfunctional, is that they're written to fit together. Married with Children even has an episode in which I recall everyone in the family gets what they want finally. Al FINALLY gets everything he ever wanted. He gets a hot girl who wants him, he gets money, he gets all of it, and yet he feels more empty than he ever did because he realizes that what really gives meaning to his life is his family, with all their issues and quirks. I think this show is interesting and unique and I love the spin on it, but your analysis of that old school family man trope is a little exaggerated. We aren't supposed to look at these sitcom families that are dysfunctional and see them as real or imitate them. They're just there for entertainment with some lessons and morales sprinkled through, which you can take as you want. Don't substitute those shows for reality. We shouldn't be asking "if this character was a real person?" because they're not. Like I said they may be written with real life qualities but at the end of the day they're just characters. Homer Simpson is a character and of course if he was real no one would be able to deal with him, or Marge, or anyone in that family, and that's why they make good tv.
Yeah I have to wonder how many people justify mistreating their spouses because they saw Homer Simpson do it. The guy in the sitcom is usually the butt of the joke, who actually wants to BE him?
What a super cool video! Glad to see someone give this show some light and credit. Your breakdown and theorizing are top notch, and I'm totally on board with the underlying suspicion of an abusive Kevin. Especially after episode 7. Would just like to add, the performances by Annie Murphy and Mary Hollis Imboden are stellar in this show. Thanks for the great analysis.
The sitcom framing device is a metaphor - and a brilliant one at that. For most white cis men, they live in the world like they are the star. They are the main characters, everything works out for them, everything revolves around them. And because the man is the main character, the world is only shiny and perfect when he’s there, it doesn’t exist for Allison. Basically, men live in their own little worlds - where cooking, cleaning, bills, responsibility, consequences don’t exist. Two outside examples I can point to are the “mental labor” comic and the skit here on RUclips about the “magic table”.
only 800 subs?? your production value is on point, funny, sensitive, and insightful scripts, and no obnoxious gimmicks (/cough/ like heavy spoilers) - i subbed real fast. love what you're doing and excited to see more. i'm sure you're on the rise.
The coping thing has been my theory since the show started. I was sure they were going to show Kevin in the drama world and reveal him to be a total monster, but it looks like they won't go that route. My off the wall predictions for the finale are that Sam kills Kevin and Alison is pregnant with someone's baby.
My theory all along was that she was having a mental breakdown, and that the "sitcom" version was how she coped. I even thought for a while that she might be in an institution, and recounting to her therapist how things were (sitcom), vs how they really were (reality).
My only problem is that from what I've seen of shows like King of Queens, which is like only a few episodes, the wife character is often shown to be irrational, controling, dishonest at times, and moody while Kevin James is dopey yet kind. That's probably just another problem of female stereotypes in media
Alot of the sitcoms he showed at the begging have female characters that are equally as destructive as their husband. Married With Children also, is the same the entire family is a nut house. The Simpson Everybody loves Raymond and According to Jim is more in line with the commentary of this show.
I think you're totally missing the point of the show, and I really don't think you need to be a woman to recognize it. Sitcoms typically sensationalize harmful behaviours and ideologies, including misogyny and heteronormativity. These shows not only reproduce such harmful things, but contribute to them by creating narratives that allow husbands to get away with harm under the veil of charming, superficial humour. Kevin Can F Himself dramatizes real situations of misogyny and heteronormativity by showing the two worlds that Kevin and Allison live in - Kevin sees his life as an american family sitcom where he doesn't have to take any real responsibility for his harmful behaviours, and Allison lives in a more realistic drama where she has reached her breaking point with Kevin's crap. Ultimately, the show comments on the actual reality that there are many men who live like Kevin, see american family sitcoms or shows like Family Guy, and feel validated by them and then end up living according to their beer-loving-man-can-do-no-wrong narratives, regardless of the harm it *causes*. Yes, Allison struggles with mental health issues, but just as much as anyone experiencing abuse would. The tendency to assume the woman is mentally ill - pinning the source of harm on her - rather than look at the actual environmental factors that contribute to her mental state *is part of the problem*, which is the whole reason the writers added that joke to the sitcom portion of the show! When the Kevins of the world blow all of their family's savings on sports memorabilia and their wives respond with anger, calling the wife mentally ill is textbook gaslighting. I am 100% serious. I highly recommend that you review at least that part of this video, because I truly believe that questioning Allison's mental state in the way you have is contributing to problematic discourse, and I really don't think you meant that.
@@ANTSEMUT1 it's a theory based on common discourse about women and their lack of credibility at describing their experiences and narratives. It's not the hot take theorising that you and perhaps the video creator think it is. No shade to you or the video maker, I think it's brave to put something you made out there for people to pore over, but I hope you and the person who made this video will actually think about comments like what the OP said.
I've been headcanoning the sitcom was Allison's delusion since day ONE, she dedicated her life to Kevin's sitcom of a life that her mind literally made it a sitcom, its only until now that she's really starting to break free. IF it is a delusion, it further proves how abusive Kevin is, because his wife has a clear mental psychosis that he's been ignoring for FIFTEEN years and hasn't noticed it because the world HAS to revolve around him in his mind.
I watched the initial 2 minutes and gave up on it, thinking it was just another sitcom. Thankfully, I saw your video and saw it was more than I initially thought it would be! I'll continue it tonight. 😁
So i have a theory, all characters gonna come to the reality version i mean outside from the sitcom world by the end of the season 2 finale. So far it's just two characters are left. Kevin and his father Pete
As someone who has lived in Boston their entire life, I can’t deal with the fake Boston accents. They are like nails on a chalkboard. I typically don’t even notice real Boston accents, but I can clock a fake one a mile away and they make my skin crawl.
I'm not from Boston and have never been anywhere near it, but the fake accents were pretty apparent to me too. I love Annie Murphy to death, but the accent flickered on and off like a bad lightbulb.
@@c.d.9035 I love her, too. She’s the only reason I even watched this show. Love Schitt’s Creek. But I agree on the flickering accent. Either the actors forgets to even do an accent or they leans into it so hard it’s borderline cartoonish.
I’m so super excited that the show is finally on Netflix when I first watched your video only the first episode was available on Amazon prime so let’s go!!!
I mean Kevin is a bunch of what other people in this comment section are calling him, but at the same time i feel like Allison's using him as a scapegoat for her own self-inflicted misery. Like he's no where near perfect, and i'm not saying she has to "settle" for something she doesn't want, but at the same time, Kevin does have some love and care for her to some modicum of truth, he's sorta not at all the best at displaying it, and he's wholly irresponsible, but he does wanna spend time with her, have "fun" with her by his own definition, share in stuff with her, and is fully willing to defend her and be in danger for her. He's an idiot, and he's irresponsible, and in ways he is selfish, but he's no where near as selfish, irresponsible, and idiotic as Allison. I know it's not as easy as just saying "Oh she should leave him" but she truly makes no attempt to talk or convey her true thoughts emotions and desires to the guy, as if doing so isn't even worth it which is just self sabotage for herself. She will literally let her resentment raise within her to the point of PLANNING HIS MURDER. Like i get that he's a doofus people but she's like, fucking horrifyingly terrible as just like...A presence. She's weirdly poisonous in the show to any and all she attempts to interact with.
Having lived in worcester as a college student, every time you go through Kelly Square you take your life in your hands. It's why the Vernon is right there, you need a drink.
Reminds me a bit of when, in 'Louie,' Louis CK's character is appearing in a sitcom and complains to the writers that his character is 'an asshole' to his wife. The writers are oblivious to the problem.
Im guessing it's intentional, but I love how the title is a reference to the movie we need to talk about Kevin. At first I thought they remade the movie with an older Kevin lol
I’m 3 episodes in, I love it, definitely think they over did it on the husband but I definitely see where they’re going with this and it’s brilliant. A concept I think was maybe thought of but never brought to fruition. I’m hooked
As close to a Stanley Kubrick show we will ever get! I don't care what kind of person you are,, you have to see Kevin as a narcissistic sociopath that is always getting his ego fed so that he never comes down!
Great analysis. I don't know what to make of Sam (I think that's his name -- the guy she used to date with the diner). Is he supposed to be likeable or another narcissistic abuser? He's horrible to her. She's in distress and needs a friend so she goes to talk to him and he immediately makes it about him. "From my end you just came here to have someone nod their head and listen to you." Um ... yes? That's what friends do? I'm perplexed by what the writers are wanting me to feel about him. I just feel so badly for her. No one is nice to her.
I think we definitely have Mandela effects. I remember the show starting off with the name ""Kevin can GO fuxk himself "" and now it's called ""Kevin can fuxk himself "" They got rid of the GO".
The use of sitcom format speaks to the veneer that surrounds the narcissist . And as each character becomes disillusioned by Kevin, they join the alternate production design. It’s revolutionary. It’s about time that abusers are depicted on screen this way. Other depictions set the bar so high for what constitutes abuse that toxic men like Kevin skate on by in life.
I really love the concept but I feel like it could of been executed just a little better and the ending was cool but kinda underwhelming at the same time but overall I liked it and love the concept
AMC had a show called into the badlands (was really good) that was cancelled after only few seasons ,..but one about zombies walking around goes on forever? maybe I'm just not into tv much anymore but this Kevin show should have been called ,.." an excuse to look at annie murphy"
@@murryflix all in all it was my favorite show/ series I've ever watched well made actors actually went to training camps w martial art masters to prepare for it
I noticed something right away in the living room area of the sitcom: it looks almost exactly like the living room from All in the Family, with the front door closet and staircase in the exact same position and color of wood. !! Wondering......
You saw the first episode where he kept brow beating her about the damn table when really the discussion should be she wants it treated well and it’s not that hard not to you and you don’t think he’s abusive? Kevin’s worst attribute is he clearly thinks or warps reality to be in a sitcom setting but doesn’t have any of the learning moments a lot of sitcom husbands he borrows from has. Like, Ralph Kramden aka the original sitcom husband, would never fuck up as much as Kevin does without trying to change his behavior or recognizing he did wrong.
To me problem with your theory is that Kevin is pictured by himself in this exact same way, when Allison is not in the room. That being said I don't really have a good working theory for this either. Also Patty who is part of the Kevin friend group but isn't always in the sitcom style. Of course there's other stuff with Patty and that complicates that I don't want to get into.
Annie Murphey is amazing, but I really wanted to love the show more. Wandavision and Mr Robot had a similar idea, to deconstruct family comedies as a coping mechanism for grief and I think the big difference was 1/2 hour felt about right for Wandavision and I really feel the 44 minutes in Kevin can F--K Himself. It really feels like 2 different shows and I just don't feel the connection between the halves of the show.
This show was a show of SUFFERING. This is whyyyyyyyyyyyyyy divorce was invented so there would be less murders within marriages. I had to fast forward because her suffering was too damn awful. ALL SHE NEEDS IS A DIVORCE BEFORE THERE IS A BABY. Girl, 🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃♂️🏃🏾♀️ *RUUUUUUUUUN, RUN, RUN*
Kevin already IS abusive. He manipulates her, he gaslights her, he isolates her from her friends so she has no one to turn to but her, he's financially abusive, he got her FIRED from a job because he was jealous, a job that was much better than working at a liquor store, probably ruining her career.
Just because he doesn't hit her doesn't mean he's not abusive.
Yeah I was surprised by that line in this video as well. The whole point of the sitcom sequences is that it's easy for everyone around her to shrug off all the ACTUALLY sinister/abusive/neglectful behavior because he behaves like a manchild. As a product of a poor white New England home myself, this is SO accurate to how many family dynamics work. It was like this for basically every adult couple I knew as a kid.
And she acts like she is ok with it in the sitcom parts. She plays along, makes jokes, witty remarks and most importantly STAYS WITH HIM.
Sorry but people are still a bit accountable for their own lives.
@@squattingheads Nice victim blaming.
@@Tazzie1312 No, it's not.
It's about taking responsibility for your life.
Go if you don't like something. She would be better off without him anyways.
@@squattingheads Because then you wouldn't have a show. Likewise, this is what real life is like. Most people know what they need to do to improve their lives but have all sorts of different obstacles in the form of their economic, social, familial situations or their own psychology. Frankly, unless your life is perfect, I'm sure anyone could tell you how to solve your problems. If human's were like computers and we could simply input solutions to problems which would then be executed without conflict, we would have no art, drama or story telling traditions at all.
She is not having a mental breakdown. She’s traumatized. This show is about narcissistic abuse. A narcissist is seen as charismatic and often a pillar of the community to the outside world. But is an abusive monster to the victim. It’s often not physical abuse. It’s psychological torture. And unfortunately society doesn’t recognize this type of abuse for what it is. For victims of this type of abuse, it’s literally like living in two different worlds. It’s so difficult to get someone to believe you. And when you start to fight back, the narcissist calls you crazy and smears you to the outside world and, more often than not, the world believes the abuser.
Right?! A few people are going on about she should just leave. Put aside the fact that he's made her completely financially dependent on him and sabotages anything she discovers which makes her happy or might be a viable way of self improvement or development; the people who are closest to her would drag her through the mud for leaving. Her own aunt or whoever that convenience store lady is completely sides with kevin, she has no friends of her own.. Who does she have to help her through this? She could make a plan to leave, but without money she's not getting far. A man like kevin is also not going to make divorce easy. All the women I know who have divorced their husbands said it was long and painful because their exes made it deliberately hard. Even doing something like a no fault divorce. The whole "maybe she's delusional" take is a bit annoying because I think the sitcom style is more an allegory of how abusive people construct their worlds. Surrounding themselves by people who are sympathetic and supportive of them while choking any sense of autonomy and self esteem out of their victims.
@@Misstressofdons plenty of people find ways out of situations worse than this, she also chose him when she married him. This is stupid. Imagine having abusive parents, where you literally have no choice then expecting to sympathize with some dumb ass that chose a husband poorly. Get a grip
Exactly this
10000%
"Kevin..It's NOT up to you!" "But babe...everything is up to me."
The show’s creator said that we don’t see Kevin through the single-camera drama setting because *he* never has to actually engage with his life in a way that’s more substantial than his colourful and eternally cheery 2-camera sitcome setting
“he never has to deal with life in that way. He gets this multi-cam audience cheering him on, calling him a boy until he's 60 years old, and just allowing him to do his destructive bullshit without ever calling him out on it.”
She also said that both settings are part of the shows “reality”, so it’s not just something that Allison is using to cope, the world is a sitcom around Kevin because everyone around him accommodates his behaviour in that way!
(spoiler ahead)
We see that it’s really only Kevin that has that effect the shows world when at the last few minutes of the finale we get to see Neil in the single-camera set up
That’s how I understood it too. More about the dominance Kevin has over a room which somewhat forces his perspective of himself as the protagonist of a sitcom on everybody else.
kinda reminds me of family guy a bit how lois calls out peter for his bs but nobody else bats an eye but this show sounds like it goes deeper
@@evilhag1162 but there was sitcoms scenes in which Kevin wasn't present,only Neil. so for me it was more like Patty/Ally drag Neil out of that "false" reality
I'm halfway through the first episode and Kevin is already abusive. "Getting to" throw a party for his boss on HER anniversary, her dream being to pour HIM a beer at a new house, making breakfast for him and him complaining about the garnish, doing laundy while he's playing beer pong in the living room, having to give him instructions on what to get as an anniversary gift... This is not her having mental problems, it's him and everyone who surrounds them thinking that this relationship is normal that's the problem.
It's not a coping mechanism either, it's the exact same relationship showed from their different perspectives. Having someone do all the housework, serve you and also bring money home is absolutely ideal, everything is cool, everyone is happy, like a sitcom. Having to do all the housework, cook for and pick up after someone, and have a job on top of all that is EXHAUSTING, everything is harder and darker, like a drama.
I think the story is a horror. The universe itself bends to accommodate Kevin. Everyone else loves and respects him. So every attempt Alison makes to leave or harm him in anyway is resisted by reality itself.
Take away that supernatural layer though, and it's still a horror because Alison is trapped in an abusive marriage and has virtually no support. Every day of her life is a nightmare and she has this numb acceptance of parts of it as the only way she can cope. Even if you don't think Alison isn't a good person, you should still be rooting for her because she deserves to leave and have her own life. She's suffered a decade of being married to an abusive man-child, she deserves relief.
Thats it yes you nailed it
She lives in a prison, but that prison was mostly built by herself. Several characters in the show tell her this repeatedly.
@@shawnkilpatrick4839built by herself in what way? The shows premise started because they have no savings because he spent it. He doesn’t work as hard as she does, he’s always on the verge of being fired. His solutions to HIS problems impact other people significantly.
This series reminds me of Everybody Loves Raymond. Title says it all. While his wife Debra is always the angry, “unreasonable”, buzzkill, wife. Everything he does is exactly like what Kevin did. I remember one episode where he and his brother robert sabotaged Robert’s wedding invitations so they don’t need to help up with the preparations. Pretty much every episode was like that. And when Debra gets mad, Raymond will blame it on her period “it’s that time of the month again huh”. Lol
Your comment is a year old but it's exactly what is going on.
They are pretty much making fun of the way sitcoms treat the wives.
This show is pretty cool!
There’s a difference though, Ray is just as cynical as she is. This show is more along the lines of the husband is the typical loud comedy character that is supposed to be lovable to the audience for his typical guy antics
So not only has this comment aged like a fine wine given how the show ends, but I also remembered the episode where it was revealed that he taped Super Bowl XXV over their wedding tape, because it was “for his job”. Nowadays, I see that and I’m like “you couldn’t wait until 2005 to watch it on the internet for free?”
But Raymond was afraid of Debra when she got mad
Allison said something after the cell phone incident..."He doesn't expect the world to turn around him, he demands it". Yep, know some men like this. Like a booger you can't get rid of.
Well, maybe Kevin is worse in reality, but Sitcom Kevin is already extremely abusive : he took her money for school, he humiliates her daily, he never cares about her, he despises her, he lets his friends and dad insult her... isn't that enough ?
Apparently not enough to make her leave years ago. I feel like half the audience would help her bury a body which makes them at least as bad as Kevin is.
@@shawnkilpatrick4839he wouldn’t let her leave easily, she knew that. It’s reactive abuse. Not so much on her dramatic ideas to get away, but the fact he wouldn’t let her and PROVED it at the end.
i love that you like it, and i dare say the parts you don't quite get about it, are parts 'made for' women. women who have been living this double life through no choice of their own. taught to take the bare minimum and be thankful for it. the world is made for kevins and their comfort, with the person paying for it often being the alysons.
i wasn't confused about the split filming at all, i've lived it for 27 years. I'd say the sitcom view isn't alyson's coping method, but how kevin frames his antics that she has no ability to challenge or reframe. why? because he's the main character and she's just the supporting character. in sitcoms, but also in this patriarical society.
i come from an emotionally abusive family and literally every relationship in it looks like this one. the woman defers to the man and is always blamed for everything, whereas the man gets every benefit of the doubt, regardless of how harmful or malicious his actions were. the house revolves around his perspective and feelings, while everything else gets disregarded.
Wow that’s some great insight 😦 I also didn’t think it was a coping mechanism, rather Alison having her perspective overshadowed and dominated by Kevin
marriage is no choice?
staying is no choice?
Not saying smth is no choice?
The dude is harmless, non threatning nd WAAAAAAAY dumb.
At what point does responsibility start? When a car comes at you with 5mi per hour from a mile away and you dont get out of the way? Its maybe a bit your own fault?!
@@squattingheads ??? are you saying people who stay married to their abusers have only themselves to blame?
@@squattingheads he’s not not harmless, he called the police and reported his car as stolen when he knew Allison had it just because she didn’t answer a call when he wanted to ask her something. He got her fired from a job she loved and saw potential in because he was jealous of her boss. He spent all their savings on sports memorabilia without telling her. He insisted that he be in charge of the bank account because “she’s terrible with money”, but the real reason was so he could buy whatever he wanted without any regards for her future plans. He continually ruins her plans, her clothes, her things. He is not harmless
What a wonderful comment. Thank you so much.
What I like about the format is that it shows that what we often used in the past as fodder for humor in our sitcoms is actually really terrible behavior, and that if it were really what you experienced in your life it would be hell. For example Ross on friends. He’s supposed to be the ideal love interest that we all want to champion, but in reality his behavior is really unhealthy and at times abusive toward Rachel and Monica, but it’s laughed off and accepted as “humor” instead of damaging to relationships. I love this platform, it’s a real thinker. I also love your theory about her using the sitcom mode as a coping mechanism.
I adore this show and am so glad to see someone praising and recommending it! Great video!
Thanks! I'm glad you liked it :)
Have people been bashing it?
@@arain764niara I've seen a little hate for it but the overall response has been pretty positive
@@arain764niara Many of the people bashing it don't get it. I've heard people get mad at the laugh track and say "the jokes aren't that funny, they're stupid", but that's the whole point.
I was iffy about it, but I think I might give it a shot
3:21 I don't think you comprehend what "abusive" means. Someone doesn't need to experience physical violence in order to be a victim of abuse. There are many forms of abuse and what Kevin does is already abusive. There's the emotional and mental abuse, where he manipulates and gaslights her, patronizes her and puts her down, and shatters her self-esteem. He talks to her like she's stupid and doesn't know any better. He got her fired from a job because he thought she was cheating on him. He isolates her so that she doesn't have any friends or a support system. There's the financial abuse where he not only controls the money, but spends it all so they're broke. These are all tactics used by abusers in an attempt to control their partner and to ensure their partner will be totally dependent on them and won't leave. This is abuse.
Just finished the first season and to me, the sitcom _reality_ *is not* Allison's coping mechanism to the abuse she is clearly going through _but a place_ where Kevin is the Architect. And if we amplify this on a larger scale (perhaps global?) The sitcom world could easily be seen as an allegory of the patriarchal system *we all live in* because Kevin's dominance goes beyond his home since he had freedom to take the disgusting behavior he does at home _to public places,_ and to make the situation worse than it already is, Kevin gets nothing but praise and laughs for acting like that. The episode called "Fixed" did a great job showing this.
As a woman I think it was brilliant to show how abusive relationships works, and how the patriarchal system enables and reinforces this all through the lens of a sitcom, because just as it happens in sitcoms, in modern society everything around women (opinions, dreams, safety) are often seen as something to laugh for, and to be humiliated for. All this so dudes like Kevin can enjoy a world that exist to please them at the expense of the women they destroy.
The season 2 introduces the sitcom effect to at least two female characters. On the other hand some male characters never had it even in season 1.
I have an alternate theory. That Kevin controls Sitcom World. Only time we ever see him in the real world is when Allison breaks a bottle. Only for one of the others to say something funny and bring it back. Yet it only becomes real world when he leaves the room. It switched briefly because he was shocked that his "perfect wife" would do something "unpleasant". She basically took control of the world for a brief moment.
I think the catalyst isn't bottles breaking per se but blood. The only times we see the sitcom facade break with the main 3 men on screen is when there's blood (admittedly both after smashed glass). Plus the second instance of blood has a male character swearing in the real world which obviously doesn't happen in the sitcom world
@@harryseru7225 i thought that at first but there have been a number of sitcoms that have shown blood in both gruesome and hilarious ways. The main exsmple for the former is when Charlie walked into a glass door on two and a half men. Whereas then latter had Penn and Teller do an over the top bleeding session on the Drew Carrey show. In both instances here though, the blood and cussing are only shown after the shift already happens and the shift starts when the sound of glass is heard breaking loudly.
She took control of her life. Kevin is a narcissist. They can’t deal when their victim asserts control over their own lives.
@@FirstNameLastName-wt5to she didn't just take control of her life. She briefly brought him into her world.
Just wait until you see the finale, if you haven’t already. This show is not playing around and I might be slightly obsessed!
Just saw the finale and OH MY GAWD!!!
Hahaha, pretty great right?
Omg me too
It didn't know the finale had aired yet. I just watched the one where they want to start a band and thought that was the latest.
@@cc3184 the finale is available on amc+, but it will be airing on amc Sunday night
"Worcester is an up and coming city." "No it's not." That definitely is WORCESTER. Allison captured the cyncial nature of Worcester perfectly here.
As someone who is from Worcester England, it’s so weird to hear the name of a town that even other English people often haven’t heard of.
Except weirdly for the first time in decades it actually is an up and coming city! .. but that’s only because Boston is becoming ridiculously expensive to live in and everyone is moving to Worcester .. so now they’re kind of turning Worcester into mini Boston I guess… it’s got pros and cons for sure
Yup. You can feel the depressing cold whenever she’s walking around in the show.
Wow, I’m super shocked to see someone talking about this show but it makes me so happy. This show has been good and only gets better with each week!
I also love how they shot this show by having wide panels/composition and more saturation during the sitcom parts but immediately going to a more desaturated and compressed composition- almost as if it’s showing how Allison feels trapped in a box whilst Kevin is living more happily on the outside doing whatever he pleases. I love it when shows do stuff like this because it helps show a much bigger contrast between characters and helps pushes the main conflict “forward” and how someone could be almost completely oblivious to the world around them but still affect others immensely
It may also be portrayed the way it is to have us reconsider the troupes in most sitcoms. The husbands in questions tend to be self-centered and stupid. I can't think of all of the times when I have checked into a sitcom just to wonder WHY these woman would be with these men. It is a question worth asking.
There is no question to be asked, the sitcoms are written by gay men who have no idea of family life and are trying to present to you a picture. If you fall for it you are falling for someone else's idea of what a family is supposed to be like. Very much like the idiots that fall for others' facebook/instagram stories and think thats how life is supposed to be like when those carefully filter out the bad parts of their day. Anyway, TV rots your brain, whether its this show or any other, the writers of this show are rottenbrains who fail to realize that while most sitcoms are unrealistic, it is not for the reasons they think.
Perfect example for this is "All in the family"
something about this show that really got me hooked was the split perception. I think it shows she masks for everyone around her but when she leaves the room she takes it off. I haven’t gotten to far but honestly I think it’s a good play on a sitcom and drama mix
It's one story of a small town abusive relationship from two perspectives. Hers and his. He's just having fun and dealing with all her "issues" (never satisfied, always drama, amirite, guys?), while she's not allowed to drive (even though she's never had an accident, while he has), have friends of her own (even though his are always getting him into trouble), manage money (he wastes it on bad investments or dumb purchases) , go out of town without him calling the cops when she doesn't answer her phone, have a job of her choosing (because he gets an employee discount at the liquor store). Thank goodness they haven't had kids or she would be even more tied to this situation.
DUDE, I have some thoughts about your sit-com theory! Looking at it as a coping mechanism makes a lot of sense for how I'd been looking at Kevin through this lens. That moment Kevin let some whack-job assist in interrogating his wife? Bone-chilling once removed from the sit-com context. My husband and I were freaking ourselves out over him saying that he "demands loyalty."
Honestly, the scene with the bottle breaking and Allison hurt her hand got to me. Like, your wife is hurt and bleeding, she looks sick and out of it, and you want to make a fucking period joke?
Dark and love the cast.
They actually made a whole Everybody Loves Raymond episode around Debra's PMS. He wanted her to take a pill to make it better. This show has changed the way I look at the old shows including All in the Family.
@@annaiorio4543 You could take "All in the Family" at face value and think Archie was a monster. I mean he verbally abused everybody in his house. Yeah, he took care of his son-in-law and daughter while they went to school, that was generous of him, but that didn't give him the right to call them names and mock them constantly. He certainly didn't have the right to belittle Edith's intelligence by calling her a "dingbat." And that's not even going into all the ignorance and racism. Yeah, Archie Bunker had his good qualities, but make no mistake, he wasn't a working class hero, he was an asshole.
@@TheKennethECarper Mike wasn't much better. He belittled Gloria and was a male chavounist.
Given it occurs in the first episode, I don’t think it’s a spoiler to say she plots to kill him after the first episode. This fact is both explained by and explains the show as a response to Kevin Can Wait, specifically, as well as King of Queens and others in the sub genre. In Kevin Can Wait, the wife dies after the first season, and the characters apparently act like they don’t care and her life didn’t matter. The wife’s response of plotting to kill Kevin rather than just get a divorce only makes sense when understood as a response to this specific ‘incidental’ plot point in Kevin Can Wait, which apparently enraged KCFH’s creators into developing the idea for the series.
(In real life it’s more common for the wife than the husband to initiate divorce proceedings, so this kind of marital dissatisfaction is common even if the solution is not!)
thought this referred to the movie "we need to talk about kevin" and was so confused. now im deep into a rabbithole about this show
I’m laughing because they actually finally re-did Kelley Square about a year ago, they turned it into a rotary because of the Woo-Sox. This seems cool, I’ll have to give it a watch!
Yeah...I don’t live there anymore and the first time driving through the new construction kinda gave me more anxiety than it did before.
Thank you so much for making this video! I'd never heard of this show and had no idea what this video would be about, but I paused at 0:42 because you'd sold me on it that fast! I immediately binged the whole season!
Glad I could help! :)
What a great video! As the other commenters have already mentioned, thank you for bringing more attention to this wonderful show! Maybe soon it'll finally get more of the attention it deserves, but seems that it's likely to be one of those that gets slept on for awhile until eventually people realize it exists and discover how well crafted & unique the show truly is.
That said, I'm slightly worried it'll be slept on for slightly too long, resulting in a scenario where it's in discussions to be cancelled, and/or gets cancelled due to lower viewership, but I really hope not as would be devastating to lose another high quality show to lack of awareness.
There's a movie called "We Need To Talk About Kevin" and the title of this video had me pretty confused since I didn't know about this show lol
yeah I thought this guy really hated that movie based on the title lol
Yeah i was confused as well, I clicked this video expected a breakdown of that movie and was like "Who are these people" lol
This show actually made me grateful to have such an amazing father....he has a similar body type like kevin (but is less than him) but he uses being goofy and funny for good reasons...and he is really sensible and hopes I have a great future ahead and become independent and believe in myself. And people even respect him bc he is a good person genuinely and is hard working💞💞💞💞
Would love a follow-up essay on the final. Most reactions don't really seem to get what the show is going for.
Working on it :)
Checking in now that this is on Netflix and everyone is discovering it.
Let’s update this video. In the finale, Kevin does enter the drama/non-sitcom world. It’s here that we see the full Kevin, the non-sanitized-with-a-laugh-track Kevin, which is frightening. It makes you reexamine previous moments of things Kevin said, but delivered in the anger and tone on display in that final scene.
So, no… she’s not having a breakdown. She’s realizing that Kevin is abusive.
Totally! I made another video on season 2 if you want to check it out
Ahaha this title! I love the book "We Need to Talk About Kevin" and I thought this was going to be a video critiquing it :')
The sitcom parts are Kevin's perspective. He views all the jokes and everything he puts on Allison as light hearted fun. He is self-absorbed, and doesn't take the time to think about his actions affect her or others. It's all light hearted adult antics. He doesn't think it consider that he is causing actual harm. Then we switch to her perspective when he's gone. The dog scene really broke my heart.
Your voice is weirdly relaxing. Also I like your review of the show and characterization of Alison. She’s a really interesting character because of how she tries to take control of her life within a show built with sitcom tropes. Can’t wait for season 2!
So for this show, the premise is kind of if Family Guy were grounded in reality? Ouch. Everything is so much darker now.
I think you hit the nail on the head. I was a victim of DV and this is often how I would cope, coming up with a head-canon type reality to keep myself from having a complete breakdown.
Sounds like you’ve gotten out of that situation, hope you’re doing better now!
I see the show the way you do. The progression of the show will be interesting to see unfold.
Last episode coming up and then it is done.
I like how many people take that old trope so seriously. I saw someone in the comments say "those sitcoms are what make women stay in abusive and horrible relationships." It doesn't make sense. The whole point of those sitcoms are to show a family so removed from reality they're entertaining but but real enough in some instances that the characters portray real life family values. In Married with Children the whole family is dysfunctional, not just Al. Same with King of Queens, Everybody Loves Raymond, and so fourth. None of those characters are truly in line with reality. Sure, they have some realism in some aspects of their traits, but overall we shouldn't look to them for how to live life. The reason the families in those shows do work even though their so dysfunctional, is that they're written to fit together. Married with Children even has an episode in which I recall everyone in the family gets what they want finally. Al FINALLY gets everything he ever wanted. He gets a hot girl who wants him, he gets money, he gets all of it, and yet he feels more empty than he ever did because he realizes that what really gives meaning to his life is his family, with all their issues and quirks. I think this show is interesting and unique and I love the spin on it, but your analysis of that old school family man trope is a little exaggerated. We aren't supposed to look at these sitcom families that are dysfunctional and see them as real or imitate them. They're just there for entertainment with some lessons and morales sprinkled through, which you can take as you want. Don't substitute those shows for reality. We shouldn't be asking "if this character was a real person?" because they're not. Like I said they may be written with real life qualities but at the end of the day they're just characters. Homer Simpson is a character and of course if he was real no one would be able to deal with him, or Marge, or anyone in that family, and that's why they make good tv.
Yeah I have to wonder how many people justify mistreating their spouses because they saw Homer Simpson do it. The guy in the sitcom is usually the butt of the joke, who actually wants to BE him?
What a super cool video! Glad to see someone give this show some light and credit. Your breakdown and theorizing are top notch, and I'm totally on board with the underlying suspicion of an abusive Kevin. Especially after episode 7.
Would just like to add, the performances by Annie Murphy and Mary Hollis Imboden are stellar in this show. Thanks for the great analysis.
This was a really amazing show. Only lasted 2 seasons but at least it got to finish it's entire complete story.
The sitcom framing device is a metaphor - and a brilliant one at that. For most white cis men, they live in the world like they are the star. They are the main characters, everything works out for them, everything revolves around them. And because the man is the main character, the world is only shiny and perfect when he’s there, it doesn’t exist for Allison. Basically, men live in their own little worlds - where cooking, cleaning, bills, responsibility, consequences don’t exist. Two outside examples I can point to are the “mental labor” comic and the skit here on RUclips about the “magic table”.
only 800 subs?? your production value is on point, funny, sensitive, and insightful scripts, and no obnoxious gimmicks (/cough/ like heavy spoilers) - i subbed real fast. love what you're doing and excited to see more. i'm sure you're on the rise.
Thank you!
The coping thing has been my theory since the show started. I was sure they were going to show Kevin in the drama world and reveal him to be a total monster, but it looks like they won't go that route.
My off the wall predictions for the finale are that Sam kills Kevin and Alison is pregnant with someone's baby.
I think since Allison doesnt use any past tense to refer to Kevin in the latest episode that means Kevin is still alive.
My theory all along was that she was having a mental breakdown, and that the "sitcom" version was how she coped. I even thought for a while that she might be in an institution, and recounting to her therapist how things were (sitcom), vs how they really were (reality).
My theory is that Kevin is a figment of her imagination. All of her insecurities manifested in the form of her ex-husband.
Well...
My only problem is that from what I've seen of shows like King of Queens, which is like only a few episodes, the wife character is often shown to be irrational, controling, dishonest at times, and moody while Kevin James is dopey yet kind. That's probably just another problem of female stereotypes in media
Alot of the sitcoms he showed at the begging have female characters that are equally as destructive as their husband. Married With Children also, is the same the entire family is a nut house. The Simpson Everybody loves Raymond and According to Jim is more in line with the commentary of this show.
Thanks for introducing me to this show. It looks really cool.
You're welcome!
I think you're totally missing the point of the show, and I really don't think you need to be a woman to recognize it. Sitcoms typically sensationalize harmful behaviours and ideologies, including misogyny and heteronormativity. These shows not only reproduce such harmful things, but contribute to them by creating narratives that allow husbands to get away with harm under the veil of charming, superficial humour. Kevin Can F Himself dramatizes real situations of misogyny and heteronormativity by showing the two worlds that Kevin and Allison live in - Kevin sees his life as an american family sitcom where he doesn't have to take any real responsibility for his harmful behaviours, and Allison lives in a more realistic drama where she has reached her breaking point with Kevin's crap. Ultimately, the show comments on the actual reality that there are many men who live like Kevin, see american family sitcoms or shows like Family Guy, and feel validated by them and then end up living according to their beer-loving-man-can-do-no-wrong narratives, regardless of the harm it *causes*. Yes, Allison struggles with mental health issues, but just as much as anyone experiencing abuse would. The tendency to assume the woman is mentally ill - pinning the source of harm on her - rather than look at the actual environmental factors that contribute to her mental state *is part of the problem*, which is the whole reason the writers added that joke to the sitcom portion of the show! When the Kevins of the world blow all of their family's savings on sports memorabilia and their wives respond with anger, calling the wife mentally ill is textbook gaslighting. I am 100% serious. I highly recommend that you review at least that part of this video, because I truly believe that questioning Allison's mental state in the way you have is contributing to problematic discourse, and I really don't think you meant that.
I don't think OP is questioning her mental state per say but more theorycrafting the logic behind the framing device.
@@ANTSEMUT1 it's a theory based on common discourse about women and their lack of credibility at describing their experiences and narratives. It's not the hot take theorising that you and perhaps the video creator think it is. No shade to you or the video maker, I think it's brave to put something you made out there for people to pore over, but I hope you and the person who made this video will actually think about comments like what the OP said.
I've been headcanoning the sitcom was Allison's delusion since day ONE, she dedicated her life to Kevin's sitcom of a life that her mind literally made it a sitcom, its only until now that she's really starting to break free. IF it is a delusion, it further proves how abusive Kevin is, because his wife has a clear mental psychosis that he's been ignoring for FIFTEEN years and hasn't noticed it because the world HAS to revolve around him in his mind.
I agree, more people need to see this.
"I'm auditioning Tom Brady look-a-likes for the PAH-DEE!"
I watched the initial 2 minutes and gave up on it, thinking it was just another sitcom. Thankfully, I saw your video and saw it was more than I initially thought it would be! I'll continue it tonight. 😁
So i have a theory, all characters gonna come to the reality version i mean outside from the sitcom world by the end of the season 2 finale.
So far it's just two characters are left. Kevin and his father Pete
Fantastic show....love it!
As someone who has lived in Boston their entire life, I can’t deal with the fake Boston accents. They are like nails on a chalkboard. I typically don’t even notice real Boston accents, but I can clock a fake one a mile away and they make my skin crawl.
I'm not from Boston and have never been anywhere near it, but the fake accents were pretty apparent to me too. I love Annie Murphy to death, but the accent flickered on and off like a bad lightbulb.
@@c.d.9035 I love her, too. She’s the only reason I even watched this show. Love Schitt’s Creek. But I agree on the flickering accent. Either the actors forgets to even do an accent or they leans into it so hard it’s borderline cartoonish.
I’m so super excited that the show is finally on Netflix when I first watched your video only the first episode was available on Amazon prime so let’s go!!!
I mean Kevin is a bunch of what other people in this comment section are calling him, but at the same time i feel like Allison's using him as a scapegoat for her own self-inflicted misery.
Like he's no where near perfect, and i'm not saying she has to "settle" for something she doesn't want, but at the same time, Kevin does have some love and care for her to some modicum of truth, he's sorta not at all the best at displaying it, and he's wholly irresponsible, but he does wanna spend time with her, have "fun" with her by his own definition, share in stuff with her, and is fully willing to defend her and be in danger for her.
He's an idiot, and he's irresponsible, and in ways he is selfish, but he's no where near as selfish, irresponsible, and idiotic as Allison.
I know it's not as easy as just saying "Oh she should leave him" but she truly makes no attempt to talk or convey her true thoughts emotions and desires to the guy, as if doing so isn't even worth it which is just self sabotage for herself.
She will literally let her resentment raise within her to the point of PLANNING HIS MURDER.
Like i get that he's a doofus people but she's like, fucking horrifyingly terrible as just like...A presence. She's weirdly poisonous in the show to any and all she attempts to interact with.
I haven't watched it yet but based on your review, I look forward to it. Nice job on your video. Well done. I'm subscribing.
Having lived in worcester as a college student, every time you go through Kelly Square you take your life in your hands. It's why the Vernon is right there, you need a drink.
Reminds me a bit of when, in 'Louie,' Louis CK's character is appearing in a sitcom and complains to the writers that his character is 'an asshole' to his wife. The writers are oblivious to the problem.
Married with Children didn't belong on that lead in, completely subverts the loveable loser family sitcoms.
Im guessing it's intentional, but I love how the title is a reference to the movie we need to talk about Kevin. At first I thought they remade the movie with an older Kevin lol
I’m 3 episodes in, I love it, definitely think they over did it on the husband but I definitely see where they’re going with this and it’s brilliant. A concept I think was maybe thought of but never brought to fruition. I’m hooked
Holy shit I saw this guy in the national tour of Shrek the musical and now I desperately need to watch this show
This show was my surprise hit of 2021!
I love this. I think it’s clever & twisty.
I don’t know anyone watching it?
Thank you for your praise.
I love this show because I HATE all the 'Kevin' types in sitcoms.
Great video! I just started this show the other day and I’m excited to see how they’re gonna turn these tropes on their head. Definitely subbed! 🙌
I don’t get how ppl don’t get this show it’s so good
I think it's a combination of people being stupid, and the show capture these type of sitcoms so well .
I love this show. Many people don’t like this show but I never seen this as it’s like one of a kind.
The stereotype was always the man is the dope and the woman is the voice of reason.
As close to a Stanley Kubrick show we will ever get!
I don't care what kind of person you are,, you have to see Kevin as a narcissistic sociopath that is always getting his ego fed so that he never comes down!
I love this show! Genius idea 💡😂😩
It wasn't until Kevin started being an actual asshole to everyone that everyone realized how awful he must've been to Allison.
Was honestly thinking your were talking about the movie “we need to talk about Kevin” when i read the title
Great analysis. I don't know what to make of Sam (I think that's his name -- the guy she used to date with the diner). Is he supposed to be likeable or another narcissistic abuser? He's horrible to her. She's in distress and needs a friend so she goes to talk to him and he immediately makes it about him. "From my end you just came here to have someone nod their head and listen to you." Um ... yes? That's what friends do? I'm perplexed by what the writers are wanting me to feel about him. I just feel so badly for her. No one is nice to her.
When he asked her how she became so broken, I was like, “him, too?!” WTF
This is fun having watched the entire series. A revisit is in order I dare say.
Married with Children did not have a laugh track, it was filmed before a live studio audience.
Also , Al Bundy was the one living a crappy life.
Bold of you to straight up call Woostah a "crappy little city," as I'd never be bold enough to call it out like that hahaha
LmOoo Bostonian here. I was thinking that the WHOLE time about the diner. That is way too nice and large to be in Worcester.
I am From Boston so that Is So Cool To see a Dunkin so I figured it was in Massachusetts
I think we definitely have Mandela effects.
I remember the show starting off with the name
""Kevin can GO fuxk himself ""
and now it's called
""Kevin can fuxk himself ""
They got rid of the GO".
That’s so funny! I thought it was ‘’Go” also
I'd argue that the 'drama' part of the show (and as a genre itself, tbh) isn't any more realistic than a sit-com. It's just more dramatic and angsty.
This is a pretty brilliant idea for a show.
The use of sitcom format speaks to the veneer that surrounds the narcissist . And as each character becomes disillusioned by Kevin, they join the alternate production design.
It’s revolutionary. It’s about time that abusers are depicted on screen this way. Other depictions set the bar so high for what constitutes abuse that toxic men like Kevin skate on by in life.
great title because i wasn't sure if this was about the we need to talk about kevin movie 🤪
I'm currently watching this on Netflix and my god do I hate Kevin.☠️💥 Watching this show just pisses me off.
I just watched the finale and I've done whole 180 on Alison.
The "Well I had a great run in New England..." bit gets me every time
I really love the concept but I feel like it could of been executed just a little better and the ending was cool but kinda underwhelming at the same time but overall I liked it and love the concept
Season two is GREAT
Facts
AMC had a show called into the badlands (was really good) that was cancelled after only few seasons ,..but one about zombies walking around goes on forever? maybe I'm just not into tv much anymore but this Kevin show should have been called ,.." an excuse to look at annie murphy"
I saw the first season of Into The Badlands. Did it end well or did they just cut it before anything was resolved?
@@murryflix all in all it was my favorite show/ series I've ever watched well made actors actually went to training camps w martial art masters to prepare for it
Looks like a subtle new take on the creepiness of everyday life. I'll never have time to see it, but it does look interesting.
I noticed something right away in the living room area of the sitcom: it looks almost exactly like the living room from All in the Family, with the front door closet and staircase in the exact same position and color of wood. !! Wondering......
I noticed that too! I believe that was intentional. Really impressive attention to detail, right?
You saw the first episode where he kept brow beating her about the damn table when really the discussion should be she wants it treated well and it’s not that hard not to you and you don’t think he’s abusive?
Kevin’s worst attribute is he clearly thinks or warps reality to be in a sitcom setting but doesn’t have any of the learning moments a lot of sitcom husbands he borrows from has. Like, Ralph Kramden aka the original sitcom husband, would never fuck up as much as Kevin does without trying to change his behavior or recognizing he did wrong.
Man I swear to god I think I dreamt of this exact show with the exact sweater Allison wears, back in 2016. Freaks me out.
To me problem with your theory is that Kevin is pictured by himself in this exact same way, when Allison is not in the room. That being said I don't really have a good working theory for this either. Also Patty who is part of the Kevin friend group but isn't always in the sitcom style. Of course there's other stuff with Patty and that complicates that I don't want to get into.
Annie Murphey is amazing, but I really wanted to love the show more. Wandavision and Mr Robot had a similar idea, to deconstruct family comedies as a coping mechanism for grief and I think the big difference was 1/2 hour felt about right for Wandavision and I really feel the 44 minutes in Kevin can F--K Himself. It really feels like 2 different shows and I just don't feel the connection between the halves of the show.
I’m curious, I’m watching Mr. Robot and don’t see how it includes a family comedy? It seems full drama to me
This show was a show of SUFFERING. This is whyyyyyyyyyyyyyy divorce was invented so there would be less murders within marriages. I had to fast forward because her suffering was too damn awful. ALL SHE NEEDS IS A DIVORCE BEFORE THERE IS A BABY. Girl, 🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃♂️🏃🏾♀️ *RUUUUUUUUUN, RUN, RUN*
I really loved this show, I watched it with my mum and it holds a pretty special place in my life in its short run so far.
The only show that I’ve ever seen have both the generally fat husband and hot wife done correctly was King of Queens
Solid video, keep it up
Thanks!