Hey everyone! Hope you enjoyed this discussion and that we were able to shed some light on how we approached each other’s past. Make sure you leave us your thoughts and comments on this topic and anything it brought up for you. We would love to hear your opinions and how you approached or intend to approach this topic with your partner. We have received a lot of questions from people struggling with this topic and so we hope that this video can serve as a guide to help navigate through such situations. Although our past experiences have influenced the people we are today, we are not the past. We are the present. We are today. Don’t let mistakes or past experiences define you. You decide who you want to be, not anyone or anything else. ❤️
Assalamu alaikoum, thank you for putting together this video, I found it very interesting 😊 The conversation reminded me of a short story with prophet moussa (AS) about past sins ruclips.net/video/FXSgUhHZif8/видео.html
@@its_detiem i will provide you with an answer and this is the traditional islamic prespective. according to islam, a MAN and WOMAN (even if it's a muslim in a relationship with another muslim) can't be in a relationship before marriage, so basically they can have skinship and intercourse AFTER marriage BUT before that it's not permissible and now to ANSWER your question YES , a muslim MAN can marry a WOMAN of the book NOT vice-versa (which includes both jews and christian ) and if anyone says otherwise he's claim is a lie and against the teachings of the qur'aan because the ALMIGHTY says in the koran : " This day, good things have been made lawful for you. The food of the people of the Book is lawful for you, and your food is lawful for them, and good women from among believers, and good women from among those who were given the Book before you, provided you give them their dowers, binding yourself in marriage, neither going for lust, nor having paramours. Whoever rejects Faith, his effort will go to waste and, in the Hereafter, he will be among the losers." (chapter 5 and verse 5).
No worries! I've just discovered your channel and I am really enjoying the content. Also, I really like your guys accents! Makes me wish I was raised in the UK.
Understanding a person’s past can also help you know what traumas they may have encountered so that you know how to best work with them even if that includes the mistakes and what led to those mistakes.
I'm more like Amara I spill everything about myself as an obligation because I always feel like It was bad to lie to the other person about myself but after this today a huge burden has lifted from my shoulder. thank you for talking about this I have been watching some of your video and what I can say is that I love them all it's educating me more about my religion which I didn't know and had fear in asking people. I pray to Allah to protect you both from all evil In Sha Allah.
Found this really interesting, and your point about "sharing all of your previous mistakes does not allow you to grow" is very valid. And it is very important to have the freedom to be your best person without being judged on the past. But...I still think it is important to ask questions and look for red flags, especially in the context of getting married to someone without a long engagement and without living together first. You never really know a person until you have lived with them IMO, and asking questions can help to pinpoint warning signs IMO. I was in a relationship with someone. Head over heels. He made me laugh, we had such fun together. It was clear that we both came from troubled families. It felt like us two making a fresh start together, each understanding the other. Within 6 months he was asking me to marry him, within 9 months we were planning a baby. It was moving really fast, and that was my fault, I was over the moon at having found someone that I thought would be my life partner. There were a few niggles. Coming home to find a strange man in our flat. Turned out he had decided that we were moving house, having never mentioned anything about moving before, and the man was the new landlord and he wanted me to sign the tenancy agreement without evening viewing the place. He was unwilling to get a job. He said he lacked the confidence to work, even though he generally came across as very outgoing with his friends. He saw eczema on me and casually mentioned that he used to bully a kid at school who had that. He mentioned being his mother's favourite and getting shouted at for hitting his sisters as a teen. He described his mother chasing him round the house with a hairbrush after an incident when at 15 he threw a full scale tantrum when they were visiting someone's house and he was bored and wanted to leave. I dismissed all of these niggles. I should have noticed the red flags waving. He seemed so sweet, gentle, laid back and funny. The violence started when I was five months' pregnant and an emotionally manipulative and physically/emotionally abusive Mr Hyde suddenly came on the scene...it really did seem like Jekyll and Hyde, and he could flip from one to the other in the blink of an eye. With hindsight, I should have taken a lot longer to get to know him before moving in with him, never mind having a child. And when he described bullying people and having tantrums at 15, I should have backed off/ended it and not just assumed that he had grown past such behaviour.
This is very Educational content!Am learning a lot from you guys and am impressed with the chemistry you share together it's lovely.I really love your accent is beautiful.Road to million subscribers InshaAllah.
Thanks for the reminder..i think its should also applies to our relationship with friends...this is beautiful..Sufwan has so much wisdom💙and Amara is much relatable🧡
Another winner!! Again with the honesty and truth that keeps me coming back for more. Relationships are hard enough to navigate as it is but, requiring that people tell you all about their past and badgering them if they dont, only adds one more thing that may not ever be worked out because it should never be contingent or wrought with the expectation of answers. Like it was mentioned; people may not be willing to listen to people in their lives but can hear it from someone more random. I have been telling people some of the same things you guys mentioned for years and I actively saw them not listening because they have already been conditioned to believe that you have to spill your whole life story in order to have a real and lasting relationship. I believe that often those rules of engagement can push people to lie and I dont like putting people in that kind of position. You learn a person in moments and that can tell you more about them and their intentions than a bunch of questions, that may unduly burden them and cause more strife than there needs to be, when often the answers only serve the purpose of being used as ammo at another time. It does my heart good to see and hear the level of maturity that you two share and you have no idea how many people need to hear your insight. Keep changing lives and perspectives. I wish you blessings abound. Always love, love always.
As a victom support worker for donestic abuse victims particularly of the South Asian culture, common red flag of their narcissistic abusive husbands who later became manipulative emotionally and physically abusive is that the men and their families would shut down conversations about past relationships and marriage, refusing to answer very basic questions such as what went wrong, i think it's very important you put a disclaimer that repeated refusal to answer questions of their past when getting to know them for marriage CAN be a red flag of a potentially abusive person, your advise in the video can end up leading our sisters into abusive dynamics
Yes, we can definitely appreciate that. We have a video on red flags and abuse coming up in which we will try our best to address all of this iA. It is an issue that is very close and important to us both and something we speak about often. This video was for a specific audience that had reached out to us over this issue. It is true that repeated refusal CAN be a red flag. It can also just be someone being private. There is a difference between privacy and secrecy, and refusal to speak on something is not necessarily admission of guilt. As Muslims, we have to take into consideration the Islamic rulings on this matter. I know many good people who made bad choices in their past. I also know many situations in which the man/woman had never been married before and turned out to be abusive. A failed past relationship is not directly linked to abuse. It is a very intricate topic which hopefully over the course of a few videos, we can cover holistically. As mentioned above though, this video was for a specific situation. May Allah reward you for the work you do, protect our women, and give the sufferers of such situations justice, peace, and happiness in this life and the next. 🤲
We need more..your videos/content is something I look forward to.your conversations are so educative when it comes to relationships.we should all accept that everyone has a past and that past shouldn't affect our present and our future..
This was one of my favorite videos. So much wisdom behind what both of you said. God bless you both and keep your marriage filled with love and happiness always ❤
I think regardless of someone’s journey a potential spouse should know the full details and make a decision on this basis. If someone holds past sins and mistakes against you, that’s on him/her and that person isn’t for you. I’m not saying share that with a first date or everyone you encounter before you decide to proceed to marriage. I would say use discernment on the timing and person you share with but be fully transparent. It can save both parties time and heart ache down the line.
100% true you don't want go without knowing the past and how it ended and hearing that from other ppl that would be embracing knowing things about your spouse from others.
Love the discussion and I agree.......As for me I talk about everything with my husband honesty is the best policy and past secrets can sometimes put a strain on ones current relationship depends on what happens in the past👌🏽👍🏼......lots of love from Jamaica 💗🇯🇲🇯🇲💖
Sometimes learning about each other's past helps to build strong intimacy and then, the pros and cons of that past life will teach both couples a big life lesson.
Again smashed out of the park. Honestly, you both are such good teachers the kids you teach are so lucky and we are too getting to be here too. I never thought about it in this holistic view when wanted to know about a potential spouse and that example with the job interview honestly hit home and it makes so much sense. I love this and you both feel like my older siblings who give the best advice. May Allah always bless you. امين ❤
Awwww, we love you sis! You always watch our videos and let us know what you think 🤗❤️ you're too lovely ma shaa Allah. Thank you for your encouraging, sweet words 💖 love that we explored this topic & so glad to know you found it interesting. I love Sufyan's job interview example too, made me think! May Allah SWT bless and protect you my sweet sister 💖🤗 lots of love and hugs to you xxxxx
Sufyan is my kinda person but I understand where Amara is coming from oversharing and also wanting that from others too. Such a great video so much wisdom💫 thank you for sharing!
When he talked about the day of judgement I got chills. Mashallah great information. Inshallah I can find my future wife soon! #Whereismypalestinianwife🧕🇸🇩
This discussion was so much better and practical than what many marriage counselors offer. You guys not only have the talent but also the proficiency to explain your point of view. Excellent and amazing 👏 👌 . I liked the quote " A wise man once said...... nothing " wow 👌 👌👌superb.
I loved this discussion because it allows people to know everyone have their trials they run into, but what matters is how you overcome those obstacles!!! Amara is my spirit sister. I want to know everything as if I were there. Idk where it comes from and why, but yes, I want to know EVERYTHING......💜💜💜
100% agree. I got the shivers when you were speaking about how loving, forgiving and merciful Allah/God is. I agree that you don't have to share everything. I am learning that honesty is the best policy but silence is also an option. We are given a new chance to change every single day, that is how good Allah is. I have made the mistake of sharing my past before and it only serves to continue on negative energy that was otherwise dead. God has ultimate compassion and understanding of 'why' you did what you did. People don't. None of us can compare to God in our perspective. I have learned the hard way not to trust everyone with my secrets or with things about your past. If my future husband asks too many questions I will just politely decline. Thanks for the wisdom you two. It is really refreshing. 🙏✨
Exactly! It really sheds light on Everyone's approach to this topic. Jazakallahu khairan. May Allah Azzawajal bless you both. Aameen. love you two. You both are knowledgeable. Masha Allah. ❤️❤️❤️
Like the video so much? You two are so adorable. I get so much pleasure listening to you all. A modern twist to relationship today. My relationship is almost fifty years in next year, so all I do is listen to a more modern day perspective of marriages. Love it. ❤️🌹
Hi Mrs Claudette. Congratulations in advance on your 50 milestone! As if 49 isn’t admirable enough. 😅💖 We’re so happy you enjoyed the video and we pray that you and your family receive all the blessings, joy and success this life and the next have to offer! ☺️💖❤️✨
My husband has Amara's view to the T. He doesn't want someone to know something he doesn't. He wants soo many details! And he takes Sufyan's view when I ask him questions 😭
Thank you for this video :) Could you please do a video on the best way get to know someone in a halal way and what questions you should ask your potential spouse?
I really wanna know if my spouse is a virgin, as I Alhamdullilah have waited for marriage and so I simply would want the same. Isnt there a way where can find this out in a halal way? Maybe I can put virginity as a must in the marriage contract? I dont even know, any advice?
I think that a couple should share things that affect their present or future time together. Otherwise the past is the past and can unnecessarily bother you and your partner if out in the open. One of the reasons why u r both together is because they have moved on so look forward rather than backwards. Much love from your sister X
We totally agree, sister. This is the point we were hoping to put across in this video. May Allah protect us all and give us peace in both our mind and hearts. 🤲💖
It's important you can trust your partner with your past as it is part of upu, whether it be a learning curve a milestone, without the threat it will be used against you, if you don't share because of that fear then you are in the wrong relationship
I think being vulnerable and honest is the most important thing to do. Its just my personal point of view,that the way you speak to your partner about exes and past lessons in short shows you your own future dynamics.Because we all have behaviour patterns which only can be changed through awarenes, long and hard work on yourself.
I actually like and understand why ur husband (sorry just am bad at remembering names) was not answering ur questions back then it seems rude but he's so funny how soft heart he is rn...
Generally agree that the past especially sins should definitely be kept secret but some thing that should be kept secret are also red flags. Very understandable why someone might want to know even though they don't have a right to know. E.g. if you have been divorced before you are statistically more likely to get divorced again. Even though divorce is halal it is not something that is encouraged. Also some people repent and deserve a chance to move on whereas a lot of people repeat the same mistakes in one marriage after the other. You should not expose your sins but vetting potential spouses is also important and then you can decide how much you like the person/ how much of a risk you are willing to take. If a truthful person has no past they are more likely to tell you they have no past. Whereas a truthful person with a past might not answer so you can sometimes get an idea anyway.
I understand what they mean though. It's only natural that humans finds it hard to understand people have a pass and the past them doesn't have to be the present them. People do see their mistakes and do decide to change. If it's going to affect the present yeah or it's necessary for the person to know sure spill
@@rsm5627 For sure. I have not done anything very to bad in my life but I have been through a lot and I went from not trusting people to very sharing according to Amara and I have seen where it was used against me in the most hurtful negative way. Most time I would have shared my experience to teach the other person so they won't make the same mistake, so the person could see life differently because we were raised in two totally different economical situations and I shared because of things I faced and trused I could talk to these individuals and I so regretted It. A lot of persons out here are not nice so I am closing back my shell and being very cautious of people. Some of your business is really unnecessary for people to know.
@@traceysanchez1293 I'm sorry to hear that. Yes a lot of people are mean and do not have your best interests at heart. You were trying to help and advise them too. I hope things are better for you now and continue to get better. You sound like a nice person and have made the right decision not to overshare. All the best.
Such an amazing video. Really was good for thought, May Allah reward you both with the best of this dunya and akhirah ameen. Could you please include du’as in’sha’Allah in any future videos in’sha’Allah. Would be lovely for your viewers to use the du’as and for you both to get the sadaqah jareya for it in’sha’Allah. Love you both for the sake of Allah. May Allah protect you both and keep you both as the coolness to each others eyes ameen. 💐
I’m like Amara I wanna know everything 😂🤟🏼 I knew it Sufyan be like those guys that are fine to have limits to sharing. Irony is you do great RUclips videos 😂 I get his point though say as less as possible let your actions speak louder than words.
Amara and most girls in the comment section want to know everything about their spouse’s past (romantic affairs, love interests & such) and most men are the opposite. And they’re right in this regard. Nothing good comes out of discussing your secrets with your spouse. In fact, you are revealing what Allah has kept hidden. Unless it’s something that affects you currently, there’s no need.
I understand your view, but I feel like if you have waited for marriage and avoided zina etc you deserve to know if your potential spouse has also saved themselves.
Totally understand and appreciate that. However, maybe virginity is important to one person and something else is important to another. So then should people just disclose things based on how important it is to the individual that is asking? That becomes problematic and ends up with “people should speak about everything with their potential spouse” which actually directly contradicts Islam when it comes to sins etc. Tricky stuff.
@@TheXs.Official in Islam virginity is very important before marriage. I'm not saying you need to go into details about the previous people, but I believe you should know if you potential spouse is a virgin or not.
I understand how you feel. Perhaps the person that sinned though is now more beloved to Allah swt because they repented for their sins while the person who saved themselves did so because it was easier task for them. So it's really hard to judge someone else on their past. At the same time if this is important for someone then it could be one of the first things to say, for example "I protected my virginity and therefore its important to me that my spouse is a virgin." I personally wouldn't ask it as a question rather say that this is important to me and if you don't fit this criteria then I'd like to not proceed after today's conversation.
Smartest video I have ever seen. I’ve learnt a lot from this video. Especially about the don’t share your past. Great analogy, I used to talk about my flaws and past all the time, the women just think I’m a fuckboyyy but I’m not I’m still virgin Alhamdulilah but women tend to over exaggerate if you been clubbing or have dated a few girls
Salaams, hope you're well- I'm enjoying your videos and have just watched your previous leisure day one, food looks yum!! Your jobs are very interesting and I was wondering whether you would be able to help/advise me with regards to my 6 year old- he's recently lost his father (my husband) and its a difficult time; I really want to help him as best as I can emotionally. Jazakallah
I just started watching this couple like three days ago and I love what I hear. I'm not Islam but I like that every thing they put out their is referred back to their trust.
@@TheXs.Official Your most welcome. BTW I'm from Trinidad and even though we don't know each other personally I'm happy that we can relate in so many ways.
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Hey everyone! Hope you enjoyed this discussion and that we were able to shed some light on how we approached each other’s past. Make sure you leave us your thoughts and comments on this topic and anything it brought up for you. We would love to hear your opinions and how you approached or intend to approach this topic with your partner.
We have received a lot of questions from people struggling with this topic and so we hope that this video can serve as a guide to help navigate through such situations.
Although our past experiences have influenced the people we are today, we are not the past. We are the present. We are today. Don’t let mistakes or past experiences define you. You decide who you want to be, not anyone or anything else. ❤️
Pls what do you guys think about a Christian and a Muslim being in a relationship
Is it a sin in Islam to be with a Christian?
Assalamu alaikoum, thank you for putting together this video, I found it very interesting 😊
The conversation reminded me of a short story with prophet moussa (AS) about past sins ruclips.net/video/FXSgUhHZif8/видео.html
@@its_detiem i will provide you with an answer and this is the traditional islamic prespective.
according to islam, a MAN and WOMAN (even if it's a muslim in a relationship with another muslim) can't be in a relationship before marriage, so basically they can have skinship and intercourse AFTER marriage BUT before that it's not permissible and now to ANSWER your question YES , a muslim MAN can marry a WOMAN of the book NOT vice-versa (which includes both jews and christian ) and if anyone says otherwise he's claim is a lie and against the teachings of the qur'aan because the ALMIGHTY says in the koran : " This day, good things have been made lawful for you. The food of the people of the Book is lawful for you, and your food is lawful for them, and good women from among believers, and good women from among those who were given the Book before you, provided you give them their dowers, binding yourself in marriage, neither going for lust, nor having paramours. Whoever rejects Faith, his effort will go to waste and, in the Hereafter, he will be among the losers." (chapter 5 and verse 5).
Just discovered your channel and i am completely smitten. You both have such beautiful energy
We’re so happy you have joined us, Rayana. How lovely of you to say 🥰❤️
Aaah me tooo i love them and the conversations too
@@dr.ohuruc.1511 ❤️🤗
This was such a well explained video! Irrespective of our sins and our past, if we repent and change we all have the opportunity to have love.
Thank you, sister Ruqaiyah. May Allah shower his mercy and forgiveness upon us all. 🤲🥰❤️
No worries! I've just discovered your channel and I am really enjoying the content. Also, I really like your guys accents! Makes me wish I was raised in the UK.
Am a Christian and I love you guys🙌✌
@its_detiem Sending our love to you too!! 💕
Understanding a person’s past can also help you know what traumas they may have encountered so that you know how to best work with them even if that includes the mistakes and what led to those mistakes.
I'm more like Amara I spill everything about myself as an obligation because I always feel like It was bad to lie to the other person about myself but after this today a huge burden has lifted from my shoulder. thank you for talking about this I have been watching some of your video and what I can say is that I love them all it's educating me more about my religion which I didn't know and had fear in asking people. I pray to Allah to protect you both from all evil In Sha Allah.
Found this really interesting, and your point about "sharing all of your previous mistakes does not allow you to grow" is very valid. And it is very important to have the freedom to be your best person without being judged on the past.
But...I still think it is important to ask questions and look for red flags, especially in the context of getting married to someone without a long engagement and without living together first.
You never really know a person until you have lived with them IMO, and asking questions can help to pinpoint warning signs IMO.
I was in a relationship with someone. Head over heels. He made me laugh, we had such fun together. It was clear that we both came from troubled families. It felt like us two making a fresh start together, each understanding the other. Within 6 months he was asking me to marry him, within 9 months we were planning a baby. It was moving really fast, and that was my fault, I was over the moon at having found someone that I thought would be my life partner.
There were a few niggles. Coming home to find a strange man in our flat. Turned out he had decided that we were moving house, having never mentioned anything about moving before, and the man was the new landlord and he wanted me to sign the tenancy agreement without evening viewing the place.
He was unwilling to get a job. He said he lacked the confidence to work, even though he generally came across as very outgoing with his friends.
He saw eczema on me and casually mentioned that he used to bully a kid at school who had that.
He mentioned being his mother's favourite and getting shouted at for hitting his sisters as a teen.
He described his mother chasing him round the house with a hairbrush after an incident when at 15 he threw a full scale tantrum when they were visiting someone's house and he was bored and wanted to leave.
I dismissed all of these niggles. I should have noticed the red flags waving. He seemed so sweet, gentle, laid back and funny.
The violence started when I was five months' pregnant and an emotionally manipulative and physically/emotionally abusive Mr Hyde suddenly came on the scene...it really did seem like Jekyll and Hyde, and he could flip from one to the other in the blink of an eye.
With hindsight, I should have taken a lot longer to get to know him before moving in with him, never mind having a child. And when he described bullying people and having tantrums at 15, I should have backed off/ended it and not just assumed that he had grown past such behaviour.
This is very Educational content!Am learning a lot from you guys and am impressed with the chemistry you share together it's lovely.I really love your accent is beautiful.Road to million subscribers InshaAllah.
In shaa Allahhhhh! 🤲✨ Awww thank you so much. 🙈❤️ Really lovely to know you're enjoying our videos ☺️ thank you for watching and commenting!
Thanks for the reminder..i think its should also applies to our relationship with friends...this is beautiful..Sufwan has so much wisdom💙and Amara is much relatable🧡
Thank you for such a sweet comment ☺️💖
Another winner!! Again with the honesty and truth that keeps me coming back for more.
Relationships are hard enough to navigate as it is but, requiring that people tell you all about their past and badgering them if they dont, only adds one more thing that may not ever be worked out because it should never be contingent or wrought with the expectation of answers. Like it was mentioned; people may not be willing to listen to people in their lives but can hear it from someone more random. I have been telling people some of the same things you guys mentioned for years and I actively saw them not listening because they have already been conditioned to believe that you have to spill your whole life story in order to have a real and lasting relationship. I believe that often those rules of engagement can push people to lie and I dont like putting people in that kind of position. You learn a person in moments and that can tell you more about them and their intentions than a bunch of questions, that may unduly burden them and cause more strife than there needs to be, when often the answers only serve the purpose of being used as ammo at another time.
It does my heart good to see and hear the level of maturity that you two share and you have no idea how many people need to hear your insight. Keep changing lives and perspectives. I wish you blessings abound. Always love, love always.
As a victom support worker for donestic abuse victims particularly of the South Asian culture, common red flag of their narcissistic abusive husbands who later became manipulative emotionally and physically abusive is that the men and their families would shut down conversations about past relationships and marriage, refusing to answer very basic questions such as what went wrong, i think it's very important you put a disclaimer that repeated refusal to answer questions of their past when getting to know them for marriage CAN be a red flag of a potentially abusive person, your advise in the video can end up leading our sisters into abusive dynamics
Yes, we can definitely appreciate that. We have a video on red flags and abuse coming up in which we will try our best to address all of this iA. It is an issue that is very close and important to us both and something we speak about often.
This video was for a specific audience that had reached out to us over this issue. It is true that repeated refusal CAN be a red flag. It can also just be someone being private. There is a difference between privacy and secrecy, and refusal to speak on something is not necessarily admission of guilt. As Muslims, we have to take into consideration the Islamic rulings on this matter. I know many good people who made bad choices in their past. I also know many situations in which the man/woman had never been married before and turned out to be abusive. A failed past relationship is not directly linked to abuse.
It is a very intricate topic which hopefully over the course of a few videos, we can cover holistically. As mentioned above though, this video was for a specific situation.
May Allah reward you for the work you do, protect our women, and give the sufferers of such situations justice, peace, and happiness in this life and the next. 🤲
We need more..your videos/content is something I look forward to.your conversations are so educative when it comes to relationships.we should all accept that everyone has a past and that past shouldn't affect our present and our future..
This was one of my favorite videos. So much wisdom behind what both of you said. God bless you both and keep your marriage filled with love and happiness always ❤
Ameen, may Allah SWT bless you too. 🤲 Thank you for the kind words. So so happy you enjoyed it!! ☺️✨
I think regardless of someone’s journey a potential spouse should know the full details and make a decision on this basis. If someone holds past sins and mistakes against you, that’s on him/her and that person isn’t for you. I’m not saying share that with a first date or everyone you encounter before you decide to proceed to marriage. I would say use discernment on the timing and person you share with but be fully transparent. It can save both parties time and heart ache down the line.
I respectfully disagree with you. All past sins don’t need to be known to your future partner especially if it doesn’t apply to who you are today.
100% true you don't want go without knowing the past and how it ended and hearing that from other ppl that would be embracing knowing things about your spouse from others.
@@nur6998 yes, exactly
Love the discussion and I agree.......As for me I talk about everything with my husband honesty is the best policy and past secrets can sometimes put a strain on ones current relationship depends on what happens in the past👌🏽👍🏼......lots of love from Jamaica 💗🇯🇲🇯🇲💖
Thanks for letting us know how it works for you. All the love to you and your family! ☺️💖💕🥰
Sometimes learning about each other's past helps to build strong intimacy and then, the pros and cons of that past life will teach both couples a big life lesson.
Again smashed out of the park. Honestly, you both are such good teachers the kids you teach are so lucky and we are too getting to be here too.
I never thought about it in this holistic view when wanted to know about a potential spouse and that example with the job interview honestly hit home and it makes so much sense. I love this and you both feel like my older siblings who give the best advice. May Allah always bless you. امين ❤
Awwww, we love you sis! You always watch our videos and let us know what you think 🤗❤️ you're too lovely ma shaa Allah. Thank you for your encouraging, sweet words 💖 love that we explored this topic & so glad to know you found it interesting. I love Sufyan's job interview example too, made me think! May Allah SWT bless and protect you my sweet sister 💖🤗 lots of love and hugs to you xxxxx
That's such a Jamaican thing to say 'you sound like the feds' lol love it!
🤣🤣🤣
Sufyan is my kinda person but I understand where Amara is coming from oversharing and also wanting that from others too. Such a great video so much wisdom💫 thank you for sharing!
Thanks so much for watching! It's nice that you can see understand both sides so well ☺️ one is probably healthier for your relationship though 🤣👀🌸
It was lovely to hear Amaras views on what’s she’s learnt so beautiful ✨
❤️❤️❤️🤗
everyday i appreciate this open and inclusive conversations,,,amazing content
Thank you, Robin. So glad you are enjoying our videos! Means so much. ☺️🤍
When he talked about the day of judgement I got chills. Mashallah great information. Inshallah I can find my future wife soon! #Whereismypalestinianwife🧕🇸🇩
Subhanallah. Praying for you to find your wife. May Allah make you perfect for one another!! 🤲🇵🇸🤍
This discussion was so much better and practical than what many marriage counselors offer. You guys not only have the talent but also the proficiency to explain your point of view. Excellent and amazing 👏 👌 . I liked the quote " A wise man once said...... nothing " wow 👌 👌👌superb.
Oh thank you so much ❤️ what s lovely comment! We're so happy you enjoyed it 😃 xx
I loved this discussion because it allows people to know everyone have their trials they run into, but what matters is how you overcome those obstacles!!! Amara is my spirit sister. I want to know everything as if I were there. Idk where it comes from and why, but yes, I want to know EVERYTHING......💜💜💜
Surfyan and Amara compliment each each other. They are compatible.
100% agree. I got the shivers when you were speaking about how loving, forgiving and merciful Allah/God is. I agree that you don't have to share everything. I am learning that honesty is the best policy but silence is also an option. We are given a new chance to change every single day, that is how good Allah is. I have made the mistake of sharing my past before and it only serves to continue on negative energy that was otherwise dead. God has ultimate compassion and understanding of 'why' you did what you did. People don't. None of us can compare to God in our perspective.
I have learned the hard way not to trust everyone with my secrets or with things about your past.
If my future husband asks too many questions I will just politely decline. Thanks for the wisdom you two. It is really refreshing. 🙏✨
I'm always looking forward to their sit down discussions and I always learn a lot WOW.You guys have a new supporter from Botswana-Africa
We’re so happy you’re here and enjoying our discussion. Means so much! Sending all our love to you in Botswana. 💕
You guys always drop wisdom in my life at the exact right moment 😭❤️ all love to both of you masha’allah 🙏🏼
😭❤️❤️ Thank you sis! Love to you too 🌸
Exactly! It really sheds light on Everyone's approach to this topic. Jazakallahu khairan. May Allah Azzawajal bless you both. Aameen.
love you two. You both are knowledgeable. Masha Allah. ❤️❤️❤️
God bless your Marriage much love and respect
Praying for God to return the blessings to you also, Eyesus. ☺️🤲✨
Hope you guys can see now that you NEED to post at 3 times a week 😭😭 we can't wait this long. Love from South Africa! 🇿🇦
I love 💘 sa
Awww! 🥰 You are too sweet! We’re going to have to up the work rate! 😅 All the love and blessings to you, Palesa. 🥰💖
I think it's important to know about your partners past. It's very educative ❤️❤️
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@@TheXs.Official thank you. 😊
Like the video so much? You two are so adorable. I get so much pleasure listening to you all. A modern twist to relationship today. My relationship is almost fifty years in next year, so all I do is listen to a more modern day perspective of marriages. Love it. ❤️🌹
Hi Mrs Claudette. Congratulations in advance on your 50 milestone! As if 49 isn’t admirable enough. 😅💖 We’re so happy you enjoyed the video and we pray that you and your family receive all the blessings, joy and success this life and the next have to offer! ☺️💖❤️✨
The timing with this has been amazing. subhanAllah
Alhamdulilah ❤️
My husband has Amara's view to the T. He doesn't want someone to know something he doesn't. He wants soo many details! And he takes Sufyan's view when I ask him questions 😭
I think you are really right, the past should remain the past as far as its not going to affect the future.
Mashaallah.
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Thank you for this video :) Could you please do a video on the best way get to know someone in a halal way and what questions you should ask your potential spouse?
Wisdom. This guy is soooo wise.
That is why Allah forbids to tell ur past sins and ask about the past of ur future partner
He is very wise ma shaa Allah ❤️
- Congrats on your 1st million views milestone - APIDTA - 💯
Alhamdulillah. Thanks for showing up for us my bro. 🥺🤲😁
Such a great video ! Gave me a different perspective
I really wanna know if my spouse is a virgin, as I Alhamdullilah have waited for marriage and so I simply would want the same. Isnt there a way where can find this out in a halal way? Maybe I can put virginity as a must in the marriage contract? I dont even know, any advice?
ما شاء الله , الله يسعدكما دائما و زاد الله المحبة بينكما.
Amazing honest video.. Thanks to you both 👍
I think that a couple should share things that affect their present or future time together. Otherwise the past is the past and can unnecessarily bother you and your partner if out in the open. One of the reasons why u r both together is because they have moved on so look forward rather than backwards. Much love from your sister X
We totally agree, sister. This is the point we were hoping to put across in this video. May Allah protect us all and give us peace in both our mind and hearts. 🤲💖
Ameen x
It's important you can trust your partner with your past as it is part of upu, whether it be a learning curve a milestone, without the threat it will be used against you, if you don't share because of that fear then you are in the wrong relationship
I think being vulnerable and honest is the most important thing to do.
Its just my personal point of view,that the way you speak to your partner about exes and past lessons in short shows you your own future dynamics.Because we all have behaviour patterns which only can be changed through awarenes, long and hard work on yourself.
I needed this. Thanks you two , 🙏🏽
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You guys are hilarious. I love that you guys make each other crack up laughing.
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I actually like and understand why ur husband (sorry just am bad at remembering names) was not answering ur questions back then it seems rude but he's so funny how soft heart he is rn...
I know 🤣💖
Amara was extra hilarious in this video..." ....who ya bin sky divin wit...?!?!?"
8:26 OMG THIS IS HILARIOUS
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Generally agree that the past especially sins should definitely be kept secret but some thing that should be kept secret are also red flags. Very understandable why someone might want to know even though they don't have a right to know. E.g. if you have been divorced before you are statistically more likely to get divorced again. Even though divorce is halal it is not something that is encouraged. Also some people repent and deserve a chance to move on whereas a lot of people repeat the same mistakes in one marriage after the other. You should not expose your sins but vetting potential spouses is also important and then you can decide how much you like the person/ how much of a risk you are willing to take. If a truthful person has no past they are more likely to tell you they have no past. Whereas a truthful person with a past might not answer so you can sometimes get an idea anyway.
I understand what they mean though. It's only natural that humans finds it hard to understand people have a pass and the past them doesn't have to be the present them. People do see their mistakes and do decide to change. If it's going to affect the present yeah or it's necessary for the person to know sure spill
@@traceysanchez1293 yes that's true too. Sincere people deserve another chance. I suppose it depends in the person.
@@rsm5627 For sure. I have not done anything very to bad in my life but I have been through a lot and I went from not trusting people to very sharing according to Amara and I have seen where it was used against me in the most hurtful negative way. Most time I would have shared my experience to teach the other person so they won't make the same mistake, so the person could see life differently because we were raised in two totally different economical situations and I shared because of things I faced and trused I could talk to these individuals and I so regretted It. A lot of persons out here are not nice so I am closing back my shell and being very cautious of people. Some of your business is really unnecessary for people to know.
@@traceysanchez1293 I'm sorry to hear that. Yes a lot of people are mean and do not have your best interests at heart. You were trying to help and advise them too. I hope things are better for you now and continue to get better. You sound like a nice person and have made the right decision not to overshare. All the best.
@@rsm5627 Thank you.
Refreshing subscribed today after seeing marriage video
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New subscriber here,,,I like the way y'all give us these conversations
Very educative
Yayyyy! Welcome 💖🌸 So happy you enjoy the content 🤗
That's how cute relation argue ...agreed with both of individuals points ...good luck with your beautiful bond ❤ 💗 💖 💕...stay blessed...
Praying for your joy, happiness and that you are showered with all the blessings. Thank you for such a lovely comment. ☺️💖🥰🌸💕
This was surreal loved eeerything👌
So happy you enjoyed it! 🥰
Hey guys. New subscriber here. Sending a HAPPY HOLIDAY greeting from my family over here in Jamaica to yours
Hey Marquise! So happy you have joined us. Wishing you and your family all the love and blessings! 🥰🤲💖✨
Just discovered you guys...loving it xxx
Welcome! ✨💖
Such an amazing video. Really was good for thought, May Allah reward you both with the best of this dunya and akhirah ameen. Could you please include du’as in’sha’Allah in any future videos in’sha’Allah. Would be lovely for your viewers to use the du’as and for you both to get the sadaqah jareya for it in’sha’Allah. Love you both for the sake of Allah. May Allah protect you both and keep you both as the coolness to each others eyes ameen. 💐
*food
Very well done !!! Awesome personalities. Amara, I'm also Pashtun Canadian. 💕
Thank you so much! & We want to visit Canada sooooo badly! 🇨🇦😍
I’m like Amara I wanna know everything 😂🤟🏼 I knew it Sufyan be like those guys that are fine to have limits to sharing. Irony is you do great RUclips videos 😂 I get his point though say as less as possible let your actions speak louder than words.
"my face doesn't lie aswell, i want to make sure my face is doing the correct thing" 🤣🤣 - Amara is so cute and relatable
👀🙈😂😂
Mashallah akhi lovely tips my brother 👍🏾
Alhamdulillah. ✨
Yaaaaay. I got my notification..💃💃
Woooo! Thanks for switching them on! 🥰
🤣🤣🤣🤣love it, I do it my husband 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣you guys Mashallah are so so cute
😂😂❤️ thank you so much for watching x
My new favourite RUclips couple
Awwww!!! 🤗💖💖💖
Great video....thxs for sharing.
Amara and most girls in the comment section want to know everything about their spouse’s past (romantic affairs, love interests & such) and most men are the opposite. And they’re right in this regard. Nothing good comes out of discussing your secrets with your spouse. In fact, you are revealing what Allah has kept hidden. Unless it’s something that affects you currently, there’s no need.
Asalamualaikum, very good point sister. 🤔
Probably has to do with the fact that men usually have more to hide than women.
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@@unknown-fl2ug Don't be ridiculous. Tons of mens have no dirty past related to sex and they are virgin.
Mashllah beautiful couple one love ❤️ all the way from Canada 🍁
I understand your view, but I feel like if you have waited for marriage and avoided zina etc you deserve to know if your potential spouse has also saved themselves.
Totally understand and appreciate that. However, maybe virginity is important to one person and something else is important to another. So then should people just disclose things based on how important it is to the individual that is asking? That becomes problematic and ends up with “people should speak about everything with their potential spouse” which actually directly contradicts Islam when it comes to sins etc. Tricky stuff.
@@TheXs.Official in Islam virginity is very important before marriage. I'm not saying you need to go into details about the previous people, but I believe you should know if you potential spouse is a virgin or not.
@@pink-ez7rd 1000000% agree with u...... V*rgins deserve v*rgins..... That what I say.... If u sacrifice that much then u can expect with spouse too
I understand how you feel. Perhaps the person that sinned though is now more beloved to Allah swt because they repented for their sins while the person who saved themselves did so because it was easier task for them. So it's really hard to judge someone else on their past. At the same time if this is important for someone then it could be one of the first things to say, for example "I protected my virginity and therefore its important to me that my spouse is a virgin." I personally wouldn't ask it as a question rather say that this is important to me and if you don't fit this criteria then I'd like to not proceed after today's conversation.
@@nav33ra yes, that's what I am saying. You should be aware if they are or not.
Happy Tuesday Tall building and Sand storm 🤩🤩🖤💚💛
Our hearts can rest! 🥰 Always praying for your happiness, Lisa! 🤲☺️❤️
@@TheXs.Official 😚
mashallah i love ur relaltionship u are biggest roll modals
That is so kind. May Allah shower you all the blessings 🤲✨☺️
Smartest video I have ever seen. I’ve learnt a lot from this video. Especially about the don’t share your past. Great analogy, I used to talk about my flaws and past all the time, the women just think I’m a fuckboyyy but I’m not I’m still virgin Alhamdulilah but women tend to over exaggerate if you been clubbing or have dated a few girls
Salaams, hope you're well- I'm enjoying your videos and have just watched your previous leisure day one, food looks yum!! Your jobs are very interesting and I was wondering whether you would be able to help/advise me with regards to my 6 year old- he's recently lost his father (my husband) and its a difficult time; I really want to help him as best as I can emotionally. Jazakallah
Hi I’m new here, love your channellll❤️❤️❤️
Hi Maryam! ☺️ So happy you’re here and enjoying the videos! 🥰💖🌸❤️
One of the beautiful thing in Islam, your past history is your private and don’t have to mention it you your current spouse.
Yes 💖
Please I beg you in the name of Allah to surprise me with new phone watching u on my friends phone 😭😭🙏🏽🙏🏽😭😭 anytime u post
Your dedication is giving us life. May Allah bless you and your friend. Maybe we can do a giveaway at some point in the future! 🥺😅🤍🤲
anything from the past should stay in the past, can cause issues otherwise
Do you watch Afrimax English? What do you think?
Our favorites ❤️
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Good lessons 👍👍
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It gives some of us peace of mind 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
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Very inspirational
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Assalamu alaikum in Islam is haram to expose your past sins
W/Salaam. Most definitely! 👆
“Are you the feds?” LMAOO 😂
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Lol 🙉🙈🙊
Omy word. Finally someone relatable. Scary
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Thats me, i don't want to know nothing about ur ex. I just need info about u😁
Definitely. That’s a straight NEXT PLEASE! 😅
The past has got nothing to do with your spouses...
It's none of their business
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May Allah protect you Both inshaAllah y'all knew the haram police were coming lol
😂😂😂 My Allah protect us all akhi! We need it. 🚓😅
She is very beautiful. Does she have a single sister or cousin. LoL
Ru originally from Scotland? I’m confused I always thought you was both from the us 😂 where ru guys from?
Yes I (Amara) was born in Scotland and have Scottish parents. Sufyan was born in England. Interesting that you thought the US! 😂
@@TheXs.Official yeah 😂 aww bless hope your both enjoying married life.
Can I get your autographs? thanks
TTV!! We’ll do a swapsie 👀😅
He wasn’t ready for her to day
I just started watching this couple like three days ago and I love what I hear. I'm not Islam but I like that every thing they put out their is referred back to their trust.
@Pete dcm - He wasn’t readyyyyyy! 😅😂 She defo understood the assignment 👀
Thanks, Tracey. We’re honoured your watching. May God increase all of our trust and raise our levels of conduct. 🤲☺️💖
@@TheXs.Official Your most welcome. BTW I'm from Trinidad and even though we don't know each other personally I'm happy that we can relate in so many ways.
@@traceysanchez1293 u ment to say I'm not Muslim 🤣 not Islam
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Waalikum salam
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Man don’t tell her, She gonna get jealous thou..... hahaha
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I’m more like Sufyan. Why do you want to know! LOL ….
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Funny video❤️❤️
Glad you enjoyed it 💖🥰
Don’t expose your sin son of Adem when Allah hide it from the creation
- The power of Christ compels you - 😅 😂 🤣 😹
Jesus was one of the prophets of God
- I know - @@klaw1425 - The comment was a quote from "The Exorcist" - Peace - 🙏🏼
Scary stuff 👀😂
@klaw Brother MNIB is all the way down. Don’t worry! ✨🙌