So, basically, INTJ's are cats: --Shy away from people they don't know --Like being petted and patted --Enjoy tasty treats --Like quieter areas and calm scenery --Looks the same every day
More like wild solitary cats that watch their prey from a distance. Many think they are majestic but they are quite dangerous as they cannot be tamed and aren't afraid to turn on you if you rub them the wrong way.
@@NathanJGlass Here's another INTJ female who wears basically the same style of thing every single day. I find something I like and buy it in several colors, or slight variations so it doesn't look like I'm wearing the exact same thing every day to work. This includes shoes.
Yeah that is exactly how I buy/wear my clothes (I'm INTJ). Also I have been diagnosed with being on the autism spectrum, I wonder if there's a correlation between the two.
I’ve found that dating as an INTJ female is especially difficult. Society’s expectation for the way that women behave is so biased towards bubbly smiles and shallow conversation that stoic and taciturn women are ostracized and accused of lacking basic femininity. Getting to the stage where I even desire to share my ideas or philosophy is proving impossible.
Victoria Carrillo it going to be difficult no matter what as hardly no one understands us, the hardest part of being an intj male anyways is that everyone expects you to initiate the conversation. This is difficult as I find small talk to be a bore.
You're 0.5% or so of the population, everything is going to be more difficult for you... you can find a lot of understanding with a male INFJ however ~
INTJ female here........I am so content being single. I wonder if there are any other INTJs out there that feel that dating/relationships are just not worth your time...? Maybe it's just me. :p
I disagree with INTJs being "notoriously non-movable" in their opinions. We will change our opinions INSTANTLY upon being presented with superior information or argument proving that we're wrong. The problem is that we're rarely wrong to that extent because we've spent so much time already thinking about the issue.
If the "notoriously non-movable" statements are made from people that simply just cannot proof the INTJ wrong then the statement is still true in some sense
People think my standards are too high, but I meet those standards, so it obviously isn't impossible! Why should I settle for less? -Me, an INTJ female
"My standards aren't high, your are just low" - My INTJ BF to my younger brother when my brother asked him why he spent 3 hours stopping the door from squeaking every time the handle turned. Lol ♥️
Yeah same... Been reading all about this MBTI personality type for a week now... Still haven't yet gotten to why it actually works though. But it "seems" quite accurate... So far at least.
@@NathanJGlass It's true. My INTJ guy friend wore pants and a tshirt every time we met. I had to tell him to make sure he looked nice for an awards ceremony and he did. He also wore that same outfit to special dinners we'g go to on a weekly basis, or change the outfit slightly* each week. Our conversations were the bomb :D
not true . . .I often feel neglected by extroverted friend who flake out every time I invite them out. I simply give up the one way relationship of me trying and them not reciprocating. We just don't waste time on people who don't put in the same amount of effort. If you want to maintain a friendship with an INTJ, out in what you expect back.
You might not see our emotions yet they are still present. While you might not get the reason for being cut off, there's usually a lot of thinking on it and an acknowledgement that none of us need shallow or ignorant people in our lives.
INTJ Female here: I don't wear exactly the same clothes every day, but I don't have a lot of variety either. I have 2 pairs of jeans and a variety of blouses, which are all basically the same style shirt in different colors and with different sleeve lengths according to the weather. I pretty much always wear these with grey ballet flats. I have other clothes for special occasions or the gym, but for the most part, I just rotate the same 5 outfits over and over again. I never understood women who had a closet full of shoes when neutral pair that protects my feet and goes with everything will do the job. Nobody cares what is on your feet. The conspiracy theory thing is spot on though. But they aren't all just theories, hence the interest...
Much older INTJ man...I care very much what's on a woman's foot. It says a lot about her. I get though, why an INTJ lady would dismiss anything not practical, in her footwear (especially if it was uncomfortable ).
teonaalex definitely an INTJ. I’ve taken the test several times and always get the same result every time. The description is always spot on. I didn’t say I don’t care about how I look. The clothes I wear are nice. But they are efficient. Everything goes with everything else. I have a certain style and colors that I know are flattering, and I stick with it. I never follow fashion trends. I look classy and professional, but my clothing is never “out there” or experimental. I guess some people might consider my clothing artsy though because it’s colorful. I am a professional artist... I just know what I like and stick with it.
Brian Herold I don’t mean to completely dismiss other shoes. I wear nice shoes, but I make sure that my favorite pair of shoes goes with all of my favorite outfits. I never understood why someone would want 50-100 pairs to choose from. Find a few flattering shoes that go with most things and that’s enough as far as I’m concerned. I know people who have entire closets filled with shoes. Why have 50 when five high quality pairs would do the job?
It is extremely difficult to be an INTJ female. Growing up I always felt as though I didn't belong anywhere. I knew that I was supposed to want friends but I didn't, and I didn't know why. I stayed locked in my room with my books, and that was the way I liked it. My family didn't understand me, because they are all extroverts and are very affectionate with one another, and I am not either of those. It was especially hard when I was of age to start dating. I never grasped the concept of flirting. I hate chit chat, so I would always scare guys away by jumping into philosophy or the newest scientific theories. I was always envious of the fluttery, popular pretty girls who had friends and carried on idle conversation with ease. Up to the point where I took the Briggs-Meyer test I thought I was completely wired wrong. I've just never felt like a "real" girl (I don't know if that even makes sense). I have no girl friends, because I unintentionally offend them. I've learned that not everything has to have an honest answer. Being and INTJ is extremely lonely and isolating. If I could become an extrovert I would do so. Fortunately, I did marry an extrovert, an ESFP, so he pulls me out. I think I've rambled long enough.
yes. ditto I married an ESTP, how is the feeling with your ESFP? My ESTP holds true to his 'form'. And we are both Libras. He is a Sun sign while I am a Gemini Sun Libra asc and Aquarius Moon. Gemini's understand Duality. I only understood myself after finding Briggs Myers so yes, I understand.
It’s a good thing you didn’t delete the comment. :) I just want you to know that I had almost the exact same experience. Middle Child between 4 boys, and no sisters, everyone in the family were extroverts, including parents, so I grew up everyone thinking that im weird. BUT, being the INTJ, they knew something was up and they sort of respected something in me that they couldn’t place. I even didn’t know why until I took the Myer-Briggs Test (which I took several times and even had my husband deliberate my answers with me). Long story short, I find myself watching those shows where girls have best friends or whatever and told my husband recently that I wish I had “those”. Ive always had the opportunities to make girl-friends but like you said, I always end up unintentionally offending them. The ones I have now somehow are not as close as others have. Thank God for our E_FP husbands :) Sorry for rambling like that as well.
To all of you who think INTJs are awesome, I must say it is difficult to be one, especially if you belong to a very extroverted culture where people expect you to like being around people. They think they're doing you a favor by dragging you to parties to do endless small talk and group activities. I used to force myself to be less INTJ, but I ended up being suicidal, so I'd rather be lonely than not myself. I used to date someone who didn't understand me, and sometimes I would make myself like people more, even if they're idiots, for the sake of the relationship, but every time I did that people thought I was finally "cured" of my INTJ self, so disappointment ensured when I reverted to my true self. I think too many people brag about being INTJ, even if they aren't, because they use this type as an excuse to be an a$$. "I don't like you, and don't judge me coz I'm an INTJ." That sort of thing. They don't know how lonely it can be. I don't mean being alone. I have people I hang out with, eat lunch with, etc. But the loneliness comes from the lack of depth in conversations, from the general unwillingness to discuss ideas, etc. That's why I like RUclips. I listen to people like Ben Shapiro or Jordan Peterson to get my dose of "depth" for the day, then I'm all set for the small talk. It's not an ideal life, but it's survival. That said, I wish people would seduce me more often. And I don't mean that in the sexual way. It's difficult to find true friends as an INTJ. You have to be a kind of "old soul" if you know what I mean.
Jonathan Bowen Don't worry I'm not a super fan of Shapiro and Peterson. I'm turning 36 next month so I'm not exactly gullible. As a Catholic I also like Bishop Barron. Sometimes I listen to history podcasts but stay away from conspiracy theories. I used to be a philosophy major so when the Internet has nothing else to offer I go back to the "originals" like Plato. In my experience, small towns are the worst. Stay away from lonely old women. Regarding cities, I think it depends on your circle of friends. I'm not exactly actively looking for friends anymore though. If I meet some, good. If not, that's all right. I have a 1 year old dog so I'm not exactly dying from loneliness, and as a Catholic I'm forced to go out every week to go to mass. FYI, priests are good to have an intellectual conversation with since they're required to study philosophy too, so we have that in common, but as a single woman it's not a good idea to befriend a priest. The gossip is not worth the conversation. You have a good point about INTJs usually not being developed, but I think the older an INTJ gets the better he becomes. (I used to be very immature too so I'm not going to judge) However, given my age I'm not exactly interested in befriending 20 somethings.
I just realized that INFJ's have Te as their PoLR, and INTJ's have Fe as their PoLR. I think it's a good reason to become friends. We cover the other's PoLR with Our Aux. :)
I like the part when you said that you handle the small talks and then when it gets too technical you would pass it on to your INTJ friend cause that's literally me! I love explaining things to people but hate the small talks, you guys made a great duo!
This sounds exactly like an INTJ I used to be involved with. We got along really well. Dang! Great job explaining, Nathan. “...so we both float into the room like two spirits from the underworld” 😂🤣 Nice visual!
I am an INTJ woman and I find that I naturally gravitate towards a uniform idea. I will get into ruts where I wear the exact same types of outfits repeatedly for years before changing anything up. Heck I have been known to eat the same thing for lunch for a year or more just because I don't have to think about it. I think it is possibly less common in women INTJs but it definitely is a true statement for me.
I am an INTJ and I pick whatever clothes I first saw in the morning inside my wardrobe because I just don't like choosing it takes too much of my time and it's just ridiculous.
“Black suit, black shoes, black SOUL” 🤣 I loved your video! It’s very well thought and truthful, at least in my experience. The only think I don’t find myself doing, is wearing the same look everyday. Seemingly, I have a well developed Se from practicing dance and plastic arts, so I love experimenting new things with my outfits, though I always strike to give away one “vibe” (If that makes sense). Anyway, I’m definitely checking out more of your videos. 👌
I love my INTJ bf. Once he opens up and you try to understand him well, he is one of of the sweetest, most caring (in a very specific way) person ever. He actively helps to achieve my goals in life and is all in all, super supportive. -An INTP
As an INTP who had the INTJ door slammed, make sure to keep your game tight. But by god do I wish you the best. That relationship was wonderous and absolutely devastating to lose.
INTJ girl here. I can CONFIRM everything mentioned here. Especially that last part about signature outfit. I am 14 years old and over a year I wear same things. My mom gets angry about the fact that I dont wear differnt clothes. But I still do. If you wanna seduce us. THE BEST WAY IS TO START A PHILOSOPHICAL CONVERTATION. DO NOT DO SMALL TALK. LASTLY, WE KNOW THAT WE DON'T TALK A LOT. THAT'S NOT BECAUSE OF ME, THATS BECAUSE OF YOU WHO IS NO INTERESTED IN CONSPIRACY THEORIES. Thank you for coming to my ted talk
@@feigekatarina5745 That's strange since it's pretty much universal manners to not chew out loud, with intj's only being 2% doesn't seem likely that they're the only ones who don't like this.
@@iliya2098 It is only universal in your world. I read that Asians make slurping sounds, to signify that they are enjoying what they are having/drinking
"The inferior function needs to be handled... delicately. You have to coax it out of its shell, but don't overwhelm it." This is the key to open the shell. Well said. I wish everyone understood this about INTJs.
As an INTJ-A: Never, ever underestimate our power to adapt and overcome anything we don't like, nor our ability to learn the usefulness or enjoyment of things we don't naturally gravitate towards. It just (generally) takes the right person to expose us. Example: I dated an ISFP for 6 years. She loved clubs, dancing, parties, people, and her laugh was loud enough to hear in the middle of a rock concert...10 blocks away. A match made in hell for an INTJ...or is it? She was also extremely sensual and artistic, as well as very, very open to hearing theories and ideas. She would sit and listen to me rant for hours about stuff I learned over the weekend, theories, and ideas. She encouraged all of my pursuits and cheered my successes and encouraged me to overcome my failures. She exposed me to things slowly. To cooking delicious, gourmet meals. To going out to fancy restaurants. To enjoying dressing up and clothes shopping. To understanding that spending a lot of money on things (if you have it) is OKAY even if its just for purely pleasure or aesthetic's sake! To going to clubs and learning how to dance. God I revolted against all of this for years...but she gently and quietly exposed me, more and more over time. Eventually, this rubbed off on me. I began to understand the emotional, aesthetic side of life. The "living just for lifes sake" ideology. One of the absolute best nights of my life was at a club in Vegas with her. Dancing, drinking, loud music, shoulder to shoulder people on the floor. Feeling a connection to everyone around us, dancing to the beat, mingling with people, going crazy and letting loose. I had an absolute BLAST! We broke up for unrelated reasons from our personalities. But I can honestly say, if you are an INTJ... EXPOSE YOURSELF. There is a whole world of enjoyment out there you can learn to participate in and not hate, and it will make you MORE EFFECTIVE and EFFICIENT at doing and achieving all of the things you desire. Imagine having both the genius to come up with simple ideas to complex things, the ability to learn anything to build or carry out those ideas, AND the ability to enjoy being charismatic, emotionally intelligent, and charming enough to lead people or win people over to help you put it all together. It isn't that INTJs hate these things. Its actually that we hate how hard it is for us to learn and appreciate them, when everything else comes so quickly and effortlessly. We are actually just too lazy to overcome what we don't understand or know how to do. That's why we need a mentor who is an expert in these things. Just do it slowly and preferably with someone you trust and who is patient enough to expose you slowly, over time. Every INTJ needs a close dual in their life to balance them out.
Being an ENFP with an INTJ husband is hilarious. We’re so different yet we flow so well together. I love going out to dance and vibe to good music. He also loves to go out and vibe to good music but he likes to watch everyone have a good time. When I was just getting to know him, I worried that he wasn’t enjoying himself so I’d keep asking him how he’s doing but I came to understand that he genuinely loves to hangout that way. He’ll watch me dance, join sometimes and then go back to lounging 😎 Whenever we’re at a party or a larger hangout, we’re always doing our own thing, talking to different people and then checking in on each other from time to time or just eyeing each other from afar 😉 It’s so fun to catch up afterwards. He’s sort of an extroverted introvert. He gets excited to go out but he does it his own way
Good pointers, INTJ approved. My boyfriend is an ENxP and his ability to make up for what I lack in social graces is unbelievably valuable. I tend to most like people that love to share facts and especially those who like to explore an idea as objectively as possible. .. Those who understand the value of a devil's advocate in thoroughly working through an idea, without getting all emotional about the debate. It's utterly rare to find people like that though... *sigh*
Creating an "outfit" was one of the best decisions. It saves so much time and effort in the morning and I automatically look professional (good is debatable). Black jeans, black long sleeved top and comfortable black boots. Then buy 5 of everything (minus the boots) so I don't have to do the washing during the week.
Always wore black from the time I was an adolescent. Wondered for a long time why I could never feel comfortable in anything else until I found I was INTJ. I force myself every so often to experiment with other colors, but they are always dark or neutral at best : Midnight blue, hunter green, dark burgundy, dark gray, etc. But I like to be in the shadows, behind the scenes, so wearing bright or loud tints or shades will likely never be a thing.
I enjoyed your story with your INTJ friend. I thought it illustrated your point excellently. I was like, "Ahh yes. The age old story of the Ni-Master Plan being undone by our ultimate nemeses - Fe and Inferior Se." 😒
You nailed it. The best way to seduce an INTJ is to get physical. We value logic, reason, rational and responsible behaviors so much that the only way to break into our hearts is through our senses: impede our ability to rationalize anything and everything.
This is spot on but I'd like to make a few observations. Some of us are softer than the textbook INTJ and are able to catch up social cues... And we hate uncomfortable silences. The thing is that most of us are really bad at handling them. You don't even have to talk about astrophysics, politics or some big fundamental issue, you can just go about your day but as long as you are actually invested in the conversation and fill the silences... We're yours. All the people I've had relationships or friendships with share that trait. Even if not all of us wear the same everyday (at least not me lol) a signal that an INTJ likes you is that they put a little more effort into their appearance when they spend time with you (a little bit of make up, different hairstyle, different sweater) it doesn't only apply to INTJ's but it's specially noticeable in us.
This is a very stupid thing to say but I love your eyebrows and I lost focus on what you were saying a couple times because I was so concentrated on them lol
Yeah hiking ftw! Anything outdoorsy really. But food as mentioned in the vid, that's not gonna win me over, that was the one miss in the vid for me. Food is lame. Outdoor adventure = life at its bestest and realest.
6:12 It's definitely an INTJ thing. I dress better now because I try to collect "special" pieces and I still manage to find the same and "correct" aura while being WAY more expressive with my looks. I definitely dress better than most people I know and it really doesn't take that much time for me to get ready.
I just discovered your seducing series last night and I was thinking, "Damn, I wish he would make one for INTJ next" I wake the next morning and what do you know, it's right there! Lmao thanks!
@@mariobros7834 I'm not looking to seduce an INTJ, I am one. That's why I wanted to see what he had to say about it. Have there really been many women interested in men with that personality type? I haven't noticed.
@@zinniasegura7508 well, to begin with, odds are you are not among that group of only 0.8% of the population. There are so many INFJs and so many female INTJs in the internet that the numbers simply do not add up. I also don't see how an INTJ would not notice that discrepancy in every single comment section of popular MBTI videos, in a clown world of disposable free-ranging pawns in a giant tax farm desperate for the illusion they are unique and special.
@@mariobros7834 Where did you get the 0.8% statistic, 16personalities.com? Well they are the same website that typed me. The old and updated versions gave me the same results. These tests are sometimes wrong, and I acknowledge that, but then that brings up the possibility that their female INTJ statistic is wrong as well. I'm the person who knows myself the best, and if I'm wrong in identifying as an INTJ, how should I even know what type I am? Does anyone even really know what type they are? Are MTBI types bullshit? I'm sure there's some people out there that choose a type because it makes them feel like a special snowflake, but at the same time, INTJ and INFJ types are the ones that are typically most interested in studying this kind of information. I know plenty of people with other personalities that find out what they are and don't even care to examine it further, which is why you don't ever see certain types in the comments section even though they are way more common in the population.
1. know their values 2. emotional translator (acting as buffer for intjs - having Fe awareness) 3. taking care of their sensory 4. appearance manager - convince intjs to have signature look to look good without much effort
Ah yes the signature look ❤️ All my clothes look like they're one single designer collection, even though most were dirt cheap from thrift stores lol. Basically anything goes with anything, so no time wasted trying to match stuff, I just pick whatever suits the weather. Mostly black/white/red (teeny tiny touches of blue or green), always plain colours, not patterns or graphics,. I especially love it when I can buy the same thing in both black and white. My ideal with clothes is to find the perfect match between formal/classy and super comfy and practical.
I've spent an extra $30 to buy running shoes in black version, because all 6 regular colours offered online were like a crazy mix of bright colours (like most running shoes) made to impress others with stylish fitness gear. LOL
This video is spot on, I greatly appreciate your commentary on the INTJ and being one myself this has improved my understanding of my natural tendencies.
Oh wow. 1:53 INTJs (Me) can talk once you get them started on their values and/or conspiracy theories. Yes! I went on a 1st date with a man I like (he’s INTP) and the conversation went on for 6 hrs! We were only supposed to meet for happy hour. Our 2nd date, same thing! Only that time he did most of the talking while I sipped a glass of wine nodding. A lot. 🥰❤️
@@mr.e5595 1. State your opinions and reasoning fearlessly. If you two disagree on a point, then expound more. Also allow her the fullness of time to make a point / argument before you make a judgment. Don't do that snap judgment thing when she makes a point you don't like or the dismissive shrug off and silence like INTPs sometimes do. 2. Remember that neither of you really can be bothered building relationships, so you'll have to actually remember to text her 1-2 times a week if you want this thing to have a chance ;)
@@youreworthyourweightinavoc7189 As an INTP with an INTJ best friend, I can confirm the INTJ hatred for interruption. In a heated debate, his INTJ lectures can get insufferable and as an INTP, I already got the gist of his argument ages before he finishes. Regardless, don't interrupt. Not good for friendships and definitely not good for romantic partnerships.
This guy is one of the few people I have seen actually do a good job explaining INTJ's correctly. And your right about the outfit thing and I am an INTJ female so definitely not just a guy thing.
OOOOHHHH!!!! I FOUND THE REASON WHY MY INTJ MOTHER ENCOURAGE ME TO BUY THE SAME SHIRT/PANT/PAR OF SOCKS IN EVERY POSSIBLE COLOUR ONCE I'VE LIKED ONE....
I actually DO go stretches wearing the same thing every day. I have multiples of pants, shirts, etc. I sometimes try to switch it up so that people don't just think I'm nasty and never wash my clothes. OTOH, sometimes I just outright tell people, "I have four of this shirt." Depends on how often I see them.
One thing people don't seem to understand, including the Host is that it is us-INTJs who can understand others eventually and not the other way around. Also if you don't act naturally around us, we will see right through it, which makes all your advice only valid for people who would actually do those things you suggested on a regular basis and not only because of the INTJ...
An INTJ will NEVER just walk into a situation as you described and pass out their business cards. We assess constantly and change our strategies as needed.
I have an INTJ friend from work and despite having a little bit of a rough start, once I gave her the space to take our relationship to the friend level if she wanted (4 years), shes one of the closest friends I have now. I love having deep chats with her about current events or political stuff and theorizing different possibilities. She doesn't like going out on her days off, but she told me if I planned everything, she'd go with me. We went to the beach and had snacks and caught up with each others personal lives. She even brought a really specific soda she knew I liked, which was very sweet.
As an INTJ female I can attest to loving the idea of a simplified wardrobe. To avoid having to deal with shopping I have Stitch-fix regularly send me a box of clothes so someone who cares more about fashion can tell me what to wear.
It sounds like you're describing a very young INTJ. A teenager or early 20-something. Most will grow out of half the things you listed, and many will develop the ability to evaluate groups of people just like any other system an INTJ loves to analyze, social nuance and all. After that, the only hurdle is finding the patience to put on a silly suit and fake smile and play nice for social events like job fairs.
You nailed it, at least for this INTJ. Having someone around who can help navigate this crazy, irrational world of people is such a help. It's interesting that in terms of the 'Five Love Languages' my love tank is filled by acts of service. Helping with boring tasks like taking the trash out means so much to me. It spares me from having to interact with the sensory world in a useless way. Mental and emotional acts of service are exceptionally helpful. Like you said, having someone who can break the ice for me, divert attention away from me for idle chit-chat. The most seductive thing a person can do is intercede on my behalf in a social setting. I get weak-kneed just thinking about it *L*.
Male INTJ thoughts toward clothes. fashion=irrelevant social gathering=socially accepted outfit (question: Is there going to be anyone we like who will be offended? no=comfortable) work=uniform time at home=comfortable performing activity with others=utility for activity
INTJ woman here. On the subject of dates: I also really love the idea of a date involving high-quality food. I generally stick to the same foods that I know are exceptionally nutrient-dense; I've researched what type of diet I should eat to balance my hormones and autoimmune condition to the point that I stay in my own little world with food. However, I really enjoy going out and eating those foods prepared in a different, elevated way or appreciating nice presentation. My favorite places to go are usually sushi bars, a quiet corner, where my date and I care share small plates and conversation. An all-you-can-eat sushi place is a great way to try something new (for a flat fee) without feeling like you're going to lose $20 to a roll you may not like once it arrives. Both adventurous and low risk on monetary loss. For non-food ideas, I once took my now-spouse on a date where we made our own signature scent lotion together. I have a niche interest in olfactory research so I was able to talk about the psychology behind different notes. He (an INFP!) indulged me and it felt like I could teach someone :) I walked around with the lotion's note 'recipe' in my wallet with a copy of our wedding vows for the longest time since it was very special to me.
Hi there! Thank you for your great content. I'm leaving a comment here because this particular video made me laugh. Let me explain. I am an INTP woman married to an INTJ man. We've been together for 6 years, married 1 year. We met thanks to a common INTP man friend, who organized our first encounter, and it follows exactly what you are advising here. The three of us went for ropes (the climbing trees activity... I'm French, I used Google Translate). Then we had dinner at a great restaurant. Then went to a bar lounge where we talked and talked and talked. As to emotion management, it's exactly this: I am his emotional translator. I'm like a mediator to the world for him. :)
I'm an INTJ and everything you said was spot on. From similar videos of yours that I've watched, you clearly have an excellent handle on INTJs. I've received regular comments on how I always wear the same thing. I've also had an unfortunately number of events where everyone was dressed similarly... except for me. I'm clueless about attire. The jeans I am wearing right now may be 15 years out of date, or they may be fine. I have no idea. We are keenly aware of our weaknesses, so if someone is helpful in those cases, we understand why and will be grateful, not offended. I've watched some Frank James' videos and he likes to do reactions to a situation from each of the personality types, but I think he whiffs on the INTJ reaction about half the time. When he hits though, he is very funny. So still entertaining.
@@NathanJGlass Personally as an INTJ, knowing that other intj's are really into conspiracy theories doesn't make much sense to me as many conspiracies have little to no rationality behind them yet rationality is a key intj trait....strange.
M4D RuSSiAn Thank you for saying that. I’ve been hearing about INTJs liking conspiracy theories but it just seem (well I guess you could say some of them, since others may or may not have some hint of legitimacy) ridiculous to me.
@@iliya2098 Not really! The dominant function of INTJs thrives on subconsciously collecting information and discovering patterns made from said info and conspiracy theories are perfect for feeding that. Seeing things that aren't there but could potentially be... Fun! The idea isn't BELIEVING conspiracies it's ENTERTAINING the idea of a possible reality. Gets the mind going. Hence the interest
@@PK-cg5ej See that would make sense to me, however most conspiracy theories are just simply based on falsehoods and logical fallacies which I would expect unobservant and more irrational people to fall for but not intj's. I think entertaining the idea of conspiracy theories is similar to the idea of astrology, I would never expect an intj to be interested in that so I ascribe the same standards to conspiracies .
As an INTJ, I don't exactly wear the same thing everyday, or the same type of shirt etc. But I like my clothes plain so they don't stand out... I hear a lot of people whispering "did you notice they wear the same clothes everyday" about some people so I avoid wearing the same clothes to not draw bad attention
Damn am I the only INTJ that doesn’t mind going out to dance?? I only go maybe once every other month but still it’s fun to go cut loose with friends sometimes. Geez...
I like being in crowded like party or a park sometimes just to observe people, watch them mostly look happy in those circumstances, so that i feel like human again
i'm an enfp and my boyfriend is an intj and we fell in love through talking about philosophy, politics, ethics, psychology etc and then after 2 years we started talking at a 1mm distance from each other and touched our hands "by accident" and now 1.5 year after my dad be calling him his son at the saturday barbecue
Oh my goodness. You perfected this! I am an ENFP married to an INTJ. I have been able to help him understand Fe, to an extent, by sharing my knowledge of psychology (my degree), and acting as a buffer between him and his mom. She is an Fe dom... for sure. They do not speak each other's language when trying to communicate. So, I step in as a translator for both of them with each other. Yet, I also struggle with Fe in most situations. However, I am still slightly better with it than he is, so that helps. He has learned a lot from me with that area over the years and he applies it to other situations now. For his Se... food and a variety of flavors, hikes, kayaking, camping, campfires, traveling, beach trips, snuggles and cuddles with me, and shared adventures with me (like ziplining, visiting volcanic parks, swimming with stingrays, swimming with dolphins, petting baby penguins, etc.) are his love language. Also, yes... he can be VERY chatty when he is talking about his pursuits, standing on a soap box about something that has violated a value in his life, and deep diving conspiracy theories. 😂 On another note, we have frequently found this odd situation where he thinks he is correct about something, but I know he is wrong. So, I will share with him why he is wrong amd the correct facts about that subject. He will look it up on the internet and realize I am correct. Or, something will occur that shows him I was correct. He marvels over the fact that I am so often correct in this way. Not because he doubts my intelligence, but because I am the only person he has ever consistenly been wrong around. It has been a running joke between us in our 11 years of marriage and 14 years of knowing each other... that the reason I am correct so often must be to keep him humble. It's actually so uncanny, that whenever we discover I was wrong and he was right, he asks me to repeat myself after I say, "You were right." It is just so good to his ears since he is so frequently wrong with only me. 😂 So yeah, I have noticed that he is rarely wrong with other people, because he has already thought it through. He also does get agitated when I ask a question (which is funny considering his million questions needed to narrow down information for himself... lol), because he tells me if I simply stay quiet he will answer any question I could possibly have by the time he is done explaining. The problem with that is... context. If he loses me on sentence one, because he gave no context, I can't track with anything else he is saying. So, yes. I agree that once he gets going, questions and/or challenges to information better be well thought out. As for the outfits... yes. He has been either a pair of jeans and a graphic Tshirt (usually in black, blue or grey), a pair of athletic shorts with the same T-shirts, or a dressed to the nines in a suit kind of guy. He loves his formal wear, but only in formal settings. His everyday look has been the same since I met him. Knowing he likes the confort of that style, I took him to the mall and found solid colored fitted T-shirts, and more tightly fitting jeans for our date days. We also recently discovered that 3/4 zip pull over sweatshirts look amazing on him. So... his response is to want to buy several of varying shades of red, blue, black and gray so that it matches anything he wears. He is totally the person who will buy several of the same shirt, but in different colors, or several pairs of the same shoes, once he finds something he truly likes. Although, I have often done that myself, so... 🤷♀️ Anyway, thank you for another video giving me insight into my beloved INTJ. These are all things I have noticed, but hearing it spelled out so clearly helps me understand that it is an INTJ thing, verses a like/dislike kind of thing.
Intj female here. I have a bunch of highwaisted black skinny fit pants I wear since they go with everything. I js switch tops...lol. so I guess that's true on the wearing the same thing
It’s not about the problem of the same outfit but about food. I eat basically the same food everyday, because I only eat what is delicious, healthy, balanced, cheap, easy and quick to prepare, and could be prepared in large amount so I don’t have to cook everyday. Very few food fits the standards and I end up eating the same thing every meal. (I was typed INTJ but not so sure about this sometimes. I wonder if other INTJs do this
That "when I start speaking, you better have a well thought-out point while interjecting or better not interject me or I'll eat your children" thing has been pointed out by my friends a hundred times now. To all of them, I'm cool and calm all the time but if you interrupt me and actually don't have anything clear to say, that's the only time they've seen me raise my voice. Like why you gotta speak if you aint got something to speak. And that outlook thing, already did that. Dark coloured Jeans or cargos with full sleeves shirts untucked (mostly checked). Perfect outfit everyday for anywhere.
I am an intj Female and I can vouch for myself anyway when I say the dress code is similar for me. It took me a little while to nail it down mostly because I was a single mom who couldn’t afford what I wanted , but at this point in my life my closet is 100% fit and flare dresses and leggings. Occasionally tights nylons or some thigh highs sneak in rotation , but I do not own a single pair jeans, sweatpants, or yoga pants. It’s specifically leggings, tights, and dresses every day. I go to my closet and it’s the next dress hanging up for grabs. that’s what I’m wearing today no thought required and the next day the same. I don’t think about it I know they’re all cuteAnd that I like them all so it takes the guesswork out and I’m happy. I do often catch some flak from other intj females ( 2) that I’ve met for appearing much more feminine than the average intj. my dresses can be very “girly” and I do enjoy make up which seems to be out of the norm but it all follows the formula, my formula, that you can guarantee
Hahaha I wear blouses and long-fitted pants everyday and my entire closet consists of blues, greys, black and white, so I guess that's my signature look. I'd like to think I'm able to display empathy and am able to accept that I'm wrong if they can give me a good reasoning. I will ask questions and I expect answers. I handle a lot of the talking with clients and I get to know them to customise designs for them. So, I don't really know if I'm an INTJ, other than that the assessments I've taken had stated so. Although, the "date" you proposed sounded very appealing, a walk, dinner, talk about our values and still have time for my work or whatever it is I'm obsessed with at the time.
I cannot stress how much I hate loud environments, especially ones with no escape or a quiet room. If my ears start ringing, I will have a mental breakdown. What I love most in the world is being on date with someone at my home, that way I feel comfortable and I can control the environment. I can control the volume, the food (I'm a picky eater), and have no reason to stress.
Take care bro, I'm an intj too. I also hate the things u hate. But if it's causing u mental breakdowns frequently, make sure u be aware your mental health. Don't just say I am an intj and ignore all the signs. I have panic attack and depression once. Too bad I was too young and have no idea what I was facing. I wish I could found out about this earlier. Lucky I found love and hope from the people who knows how to care an intj. Seek help when needed. Love, INTJ
@@mr.popoballballl745 I've actually found that I'm autistic, which explains so much. The sensory overload, hating loud or crowded environments, the anxiety and depression. Yeah, no wonder why I was so hellbent on knowing I was an INTJ, it matches up with autism so well. But yeah, I've really been watching my mental health recently. Making sure I don't get overwhelmed and have a shut down.
Thank you for the video! This describes my INTJ husband so well, especially the part about social events and interacting with people. I often find myself reading the situation to try and make sure it's harmonious!
I have heard from several sources that ENTPs generally make good cooks (or at least, we tend to enjoy cooking). We might not be quite so good at baking, but cooking is great because it allows you to experiment (Ne), you learn from each cooking session and can come up with your own methods and recipes (Ti), you can brag about your skills and make friends and family happy (Fe) and following a recipe and paying attention to the details also appeals to our least developed function (Si).
I'm an intj girl and the appearance manager thing would be incredible. I literally wear the same outfit/kind of outfit literally everyday i don't like thinking about what I'm going to wear. I'm all for practicality and function, which translates to all i own are black pants, sneakers, hoodies and shirts with the occasional appearance of grey or white. Please someone just help me buy all the same clothes at a reasonable price point and let me not have to think about the paradoxical nature of fashion.
I am a female INTJ and agree with several other women on when it comes to clothes/outfits. I usually have a uniform type of outfit system and it lessens decision fatigue and stress. I wear very similar clothes and tend to keep it within black, grey, navy, and/or dark green.
I have a very delicate mannar to back up my beliefs.I hate when people start to talk to me and then sush me out when i start talking i seriously hope that every intj somehow finds a person who listens to you no matter what. Also being a emotional goof in front of us will not make you a bad person and would rather make me feel more comfortable around you. I may not be able to open up my emotions at first but if I see a person trusting there emotions to me it would strengthen our relationship. What I value the most In a person has to be loyality, honesty and trust I mean these are the three thing which matter to me the most atleast I dont know about other intj's. So in my personal opinion if a person is upfront with there emotions and is honest and trust worthy that is all I need. I am 14. I am surrounded by people who think i am rude to talk and rationalize my belifes when challenged. This has made me a Misanthrope. I am not self diagnosing. Okay so this is cringe to read at sorry about this istg I have matured-
About appearance. As an INTJ woman, I also like to wear the same type of clothes every day. My preferred colour is black, but white in the summer time. Dressing up for me is all about silhouette, overall look and quality. Although I don't want to be noticed.
I want to go outside but I have to peek out the door or window to make sure no one is there so I won’t have to talk to them. I can do it if I have to but non-INTJs are so exhausting...
Was that seducing an INTJ, or helping him out of his misery?! lmao - *We love sensory stuff* ; used to dance with friends and battle on the streets with strangers, which was gradual, but was way overwhelmed to go to a dance party at a night club, usually being forced, *don't overwhelm us!* - check - Fi underestimated, a fiery passion behind it all, "Te" is just a tool, and it floods with emotions, inappropriately expressed if ANY- check - Lectures, Lectures, Lectures, yes no matter how we try to NOT TO, we still are overwhelmed by how that full picture of a thing in our heads needs to be delivered and precisely digested; not superiorly feeling it's for your own good; not a vent up, or merely a selfish gain; it's what we direly see is good FOR EVERYBODY. = Being hesitant or rather *introspective* is a learnt quality over the time, but once gained, it's done properly, and highly appreciated. - Conspiracy theories, Paranoia, both cause The magic Motive-Goggles is always on with Ni, can lead to these extreme at times. - *Non movable* after a conclusion lmao. Bruh, you been hours tripping balls with Ni, go have a treat now, move for it later! Ni is way draining - check xD - "Fe", No comment, you said all perfectly, learning the subtleties.... and most importantly respecting it. -Me and an INTJ friend can have the same T's for a decade, and we both can start to have cuts here and there, while unaware. Not usually same clothes, but same type -Check!!!!! but when we get to care about it, we temporarily turn into devoted fashionistas. - Again Fe, as Nathan said, show us you want us to get past what we're blind to. DON'T MANIPULATE US EMOTIONALLY, no really I mean it, we sense it quicker despite not knowing how to deal with it, we hate it to the core! we will be the stereotype you gave us of someone fantasizing genocide😂. jk Have a good one everybody Great video as always Nathan!!!!!!!!!!!
This sums it up well. I invented some products for the construction industry. At trade shows and in general, my ENFP and ESFP besties/biz partners handle all the small talk, entertaining, and deal making. I'm the technical guy who knows every millimeter of our products, how they work, and why they're better than anything else on the market. They also keep me from wearing jeans and a t-shit to important meetings. 🙈😂
@@NathanJGlass and i am an ENFP at the current moment. I have also come to notice that during school or while preforming some kind of brain activity for a long time, I am more likely to be an ENTP, while on the off seasons, i test out as ENFP...
It is hilarious to me that there are other people out there like me. I figured I was a total one of a kind freak. I actually straddle the line between INTJ and ENTJ, but a lot of the descriptions for INTJ are bang on for me.
As an INTP, I'm pretty sure every INTJ I've ever interacted with either hated me immediately or we just couldn't get beyond that initial awkward barrier lol. Now I'm having a hard time seeing how INTPs and INTJs are supposed to get along after seeing this video. I usually like to interject stories/lecturers with friends by asking questions to make sure I'm accurately understanding what they're telling me. I'm likely to poke holes (if I find any) into people's logic without thinking twice about it. Basically everything you said not to do, I do it naturally. So what usually makes INTPs and INTJs get along?
I've never initiated with an INTJ; they always initiate with me so it's hard for me to say what the initial draw might be. However, I know once their Ni sees a purpose for you in their future and you make your way into their Fi they will refuse to leave you. Seems like they decide they want to marry you within a few weeks, then take another 6 months to admit it lol. From my own personal experience, the INTJ is likely to see the INTP as: smart, loyal, trustworthy, and honest. Those last 2 seem to be huge with the INTJs I've known. I've even had one specify that he considered being "honest with yourself" one of the most important forms of honesty and I guess INTP's Ti makes them highly attuned to honesty and removing bias, even though they can also be arrogant pricks. I usually get along pretty well with INTJs at first and then as I get to know them better more conflict develops as their neurosis and paranoia make me roll my eyes inadvertently, and their jumping to conclusions and caring too much about what others think (in the Te sense, not the Fe sense) grates on my nerves. But on a basic level, they're both highly cerebral types who understand the need for alone time and both appreciate peace and quiet. Neither type will care much when the other wears the same thing every day (though the INTJ will care more when the INTP doesn't shower lol). Both types kinda sorta hate most people. And both types will relate to each other in having similar dating struggles. INTPs can help INTJs with their Fe in a way that isn't totally overwhelming. And INTJs have the actual impetus and drive to take the INTPs theoretical ideas and make them a reality. You're right that they don't like being interrupted and tend to take it personally when you correct them. But once you can prove you are correct and they come to understand it's a form of helping rather than undermining or sabotaging, they will respect your opinion. It just takes forever to prove to them you don't have evil ulterior motives. We also tend to speak in a way that we see as just being intellectually honest and logically defensible, while they tend to describe it as "careful" wording, as if they think we're up to something or hiding something. Oh and they hate it when you're late or throw a wrench in their well-thought out plans. Those can also be sources of conflict. But any intertype dynamic will have some conflict. In summary, I'd say it takes a while to earn their trust and get them to value you, but once they do, you're golden.
@@heatherbryant4197 interesting. Usually I'm the one that's trying to analyze for ulterior motives. It seems like INTJs take that to an even further level than me lol. And the summary about proving you're actually useful sounds pretty similar to how you have to prove yourself to ENTJs as well. But ENTJs have definitely been much easier for me to get that point across to than INTJs. But yeah, I can't even make it to that point with them so far. Their judgement seems so quick that it feels like I don't really have a chance, with first impressions not really being my strong suit. I really prefer to study different types in person on top of learning about them online
My husband is INTP and I'm INTJ. We really gel intellectually/philosophically. The issue is that we only worked platonically in the long run: now we're separated but still living together as friends.
INTJs have an Ne nemesis that basically functions as social and sensory paranoia. Do they ask you questions like, "What do you want from me?" or "Can I help you?" We're very prickly when you're first getting to know us. Perhaps that's what you're running into. It often comes off as us being stuck up when we're really just shy and paranoid. Edit: I'm going to be crucified for using the word "shy". By it I mean "elusive" and "avoidant".
I am an INTJ (female) while my older brother is INTP. When we go to coffee shops together we usually stay for hours debating and arguing and usually I come out of the cafe with a huge headache. Sometimes I can't stand him because he keeps saying "It depends how you look it" or "yes and no" "actually that's not entirely true" in every topic we discuss. The debates get heated up when we talk about morality and values (he's more open to anything) while I'm set on a standard of moral values. Sometimes it can be tough but honestly, INTP has been one of the very very very few types that I can actually hold a deep and heated debate with. Most types will shut it down and would rather do something fun or relaxing. So it's more of a love-hate relationship but overall we are learning a lot from each other. However I don't think I would ever want to date and INTP.
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So, basically, INTJ's are cats:
--Shy away from people they don't know
--Like being petted and patted
--Enjoy tasty treats
--Like quieter areas and calm scenery
--Looks the same every day
We look the same every day - year after year!
This explains why I as an INFJ want to date an INTJ, I love cats :). They usually love me back, and I want an adorable partner ~
Very true. I've always related more to cats than to most people, as peculiar as that sounds.
Wait no INTPs are cats
Are all INTx's cats?
…does this mean the appearance part is right? I need to act cat to cat, and groom you?
More like wild solitary cats that watch their prey from a distance. Many think they are majestic but they are quite dangerous as they cannot be tamed and aren't afraid to turn on you if you rub them the wrong way.
I liked the video as soon as he said"make them not hate you instantly"
@@NathanJGlass me too...I'm an INTP tho
Lol same. Instantly went, oh that's me lol
@@NathanJGlass I subscRibed when you said that! LOL
ME TOO
@J .S lol
The wearing the same clothes everyday thing is also true for INTJ females. Or at least for me.
@@NathanJGlass Here's another INTJ female who wears basically the same style of thing every single day. I find something I like and buy it in several colors, or slight variations so it doesn't look like I'm wearing the exact same thing every day to work. This includes shoes.
Multiple pair of the same kind of pants, shirts and shoes, slight variation in color and material but basically the same.
Yeah that is exactly how I buy/wear my clothes (I'm INTJ). Also I have been diagnosed with being on the autism spectrum, I wonder if there's a correlation between the two.
haha, yes! I wear the same thing everyday or a version of it. It drives my boyfriend nuts
shit.. I haven't really notice this until now.. holy shit I have only two looks in a millon different fabrics and that's it!
Going out? That's fun.
- NO INTJ EVER SAID THAT
LOL! ~ Nathan
Depends on what place and what time, I love movie theater when it's empty
I would love going out alone to rich green spots on cold cloudy day
Oh come now, that's not true. I love to go out on a Saturday night, as long as it's not too often. And by that I mean, maybe once every couple months
I disagree, going with friends like once every three months is nice
When he said “dancing” , I immediately felt so exhausted 🤣
Haha! My bad.
same
Honestly I love to dance, but going out to a club? Nope. I’ll have a dance party by myself in my yoga pants in the middle of my living room.
Yup a big groan and eye roll, dance club ... barf
lol same
I’ve found that dating as an INTJ female is especially difficult. Society’s expectation for the way that women behave is so biased towards bubbly smiles and shallow conversation that stoic and taciturn women are ostracized and accused of lacking basic femininity. Getting to the stage where I even desire to share my ideas or philosophy is proving impossible.
Victoria Carrillo it going to be difficult no matter what as hardly no one understands us, the hardest part of being an intj male anyways is that everyone expects you to initiate the conversation. This is difficult as I find small talk to be a bore.
Beebob 13 I usually initiate the conversation with something I find interesting then :)
You're 0.5% or so of the population, everything is going to be more difficult for you... you can find a lot of understanding with a male INFJ however ~
You can talk to me
INTJ female here........I am so content being single. I wonder if there are any other INTJs out there that feel that dating/relationships are just not worth your time...? Maybe it's just me. :p
I disagree with INTJs being "notoriously non-movable" in their opinions. We will change our opinions INSTANTLY upon being presented with superior information or argument proving that we're wrong. The problem is that we're rarely wrong to that extent because we've spent so much time already thinking about the issue.
If the "notoriously non-movable" statements are made from people that simply just cannot proof the INTJ wrong then the statement is still true in some sense
I agree
if anything some of us are self critical of ourselves
Absolutely movable in opinion when faced with better information.
Exactly. Given the evidence accessible to them at the time, INTJs are always correct.
People think my standards are too high, but I meet those standards, so it obviously isn't impossible! Why should I settle for less?
-Me, an INTJ female
"My standards aren't high, your are just low" - My INTJ BF to my younger brother when my brother asked him why he spent 3 hours stopping the door from squeaking every time the handle turned. Lol ♥️
@@Grace-qw1dy Hehe niiice😂👍
I am INFJ and I am very selective too. I like INTJ.
yes that's the spirit
Thank you thank you yes fellow Intj
I always thought I was a unique human, but this man read me like a book.
Yeah same... Been reading all about this MBTI personality type for a week now... Still haven't yet gotten to why it actually works though. But it "seems" quite accurate... So far at least.
same
Do not worry. Even if INTJs are similar in some aspects, among them there are unique types and power levels.
Same
You ARE unique! (Just like everyone else.)
I have always tried to convince men that for the first date I really would prefer to get a sandwich, go to a quiet park, and get to know each other.
INTP here. Sounds perfect.
Infp male here and that sounds lovely!
Did you have any success in this proposal?
I'm INTJ male and I would love to convince women to have a long walk as first date
Same! -INTP
@@Echteseele im in the exact same situation xD
Ah I had no idea that my preference to wear the same style every day was common with us INTJs, thanks for the insights.
@@NathanJGlass It's true. My INTJ guy friend wore pants and a tshirt every time we met. I had to tell him to make sure he looked nice for an awards ceremony and he did. He also wore that same outfit to special dinners we'g go to on a weekly basis, or change the outfit slightly* each week. Our conversations were the bomb :D
Lol same, I always wear hoodie jackets hahah
Lmao I don’t wear the same thing every day. But I wear the same jewellery every day.
I try to look sexy in the same exact way every single day.
@@fatuusdottore I do that too. Lmao
Never get on bad side of INTJs, they can literally end long years of friendships without hesitation and wont even feel bad about it
ended a 5 year friendship yesterday lol, could agree on that.
not true . . .I often feel neglected by extroverted friend who flake out every time I invite them out. I simply give up the one way relationship of me trying and them not reciprocating. We just don't waste time on people who don't put in the same amount of effort. If you want to maintain a friendship with an INTJ, out in what you expect back.
@@jennyonthespectrum4581 You just proved my point. There are many ways to get on your bad side and your example is one of them.
Yup
You might not see our emotions yet they are still present. While you might not get the reason for being cut off, there's usually a lot of thinking on it and an acknowledgement that none of us need shallow or ignorant people in our lives.
I have an INTJ friend - has 7 sets of clothing (shirt and pants) and does the wash Saturday religiously.
That's me.
Wait, that’s not how your supposed to do it?
Yes
Same
Who doesn’t do that
INTJ Female here: I don't wear exactly the same clothes every day, but I don't have a lot of variety either. I have 2 pairs of jeans and a variety of blouses, which are all basically the same style shirt in different colors and with different sleeve lengths according to the weather. I pretty much always wear these with grey ballet flats. I have other clothes for special occasions or the gym, but for the most part, I just rotate the same 5 outfits over and over again.
I never understood women who had a closet full of shoes when neutral pair that protects my feet and goes with everything will do the job. Nobody cares what is on your feet.
The conspiracy theory thing is spot on though. But they aren't all just theories, hence the interest...
Much older INTJ man...I care very much what's on a woman's foot. It says a lot about her. I get though, why an INTJ lady would dismiss anything not practical, in her footwear (especially if it was uncomfortable ).
teonaalex definitely an INTJ. I’ve taken the test several times and always get the same result every time. The description is always spot on.
I didn’t say I don’t care about how I look. The clothes I wear are nice. But they are efficient. Everything goes with everything else. I have a certain style and colors that I know are flattering, and I stick with it. I never follow fashion trends. I look classy and professional, but my clothing is never “out there” or experimental. I guess some people might consider my clothing artsy though because it’s colorful. I am a professional artist...
I just know what I like and stick with it.
Brian Herold I don’t mean to completely dismiss other shoes. I wear nice shoes, but I make sure that my favorite pair of shoes goes with all of my favorite outfits.
I never understood why someone would want 50-100 pairs to choose from. Find a few flattering shoes that go with most things and that’s enough as far as I’m concerned.
I know people who have entire closets filled with shoes. Why have 50 when five high quality pairs would do the job?
V G Exactly. That’s what I go for. I want to look presentable, but I don’t view my fashion choice as my primary means of self expression.
V G Wow. You are very astute. I will check that out. Thank you.
It is extremely difficult to be an INTJ female. Growing up I always felt as though I didn't belong anywhere. I knew that I was supposed to want friends but I didn't, and I didn't know why. I stayed locked in my room with my books, and that was the way I liked it. My family didn't understand me, because they are all extroverts and are very affectionate with one another, and I am not either of those. It was especially hard when I was of age to start dating. I never grasped the concept of flirting. I hate chit chat, so I would always scare guys away by jumping into philosophy or the newest scientific theories. I was always envious of the fluttery, popular pretty girls who had friends and carried on idle conversation with ease. Up to the point where I took the Briggs-Meyer test I thought I was completely wired wrong. I've just never felt like a "real" girl (I don't know if that even makes sense). I have no girl friends, because I unintentionally offend them. I've learned that not everything has to have an honest answer. Being and INTJ is extremely lonely and isolating. If I could become an extrovert I would do so. Fortunately, I did marry an extrovert, an ESFP, so he pulls me out. I think I've rambled long enough.
yes. ditto
I married an ESTP, how is the feeling with your ESFP?
My ESTP holds true to his 'form'. And we are both Libras. He is a Sun sign while I am a Gemini Sun Libra asc
and Aquarius Moon.
Gemini's understand Duality.
I only understood myself after finding Briggs Myers so yes, I understand.
This is surprisingly accurate.
It’s a good thing you didn’t delete the comment. :) I just want you to know that I had almost the exact same experience. Middle Child between 4 boys, and no sisters, everyone in the family were extroverts, including parents, so I grew up everyone thinking that im weird. BUT, being the INTJ, they knew something was up and they sort of respected something in me that they couldn’t place. I even didn’t know why until I took the Myer-Briggs Test (which I took several times and even had my husband deliberate my answers with me). Long story short, I find myself watching those shows where girls have best friends or whatever and told my husband recently that I wish I had “those”. Ive always had the opportunities to make girl-friends but like you said, I always end up unintentionally offending them. The ones I have now somehow are not as close as others have. Thank God for our E_FP husbands :) Sorry for rambling like that as well.
This is so accurate.
I grew up an Intj/intp, but I’ve basically evolved into an Entp over time :D
To all of you who think INTJs are awesome, I must say it is difficult to be one, especially if you belong to a very extroverted culture where people expect you to like being around people. They think they're doing you a favor by dragging you to parties to do endless small talk and group activities. I used to force myself to be less INTJ, but I ended up being suicidal, so I'd rather be lonely than not myself. I used to date someone who didn't understand me, and sometimes I would make myself like people more, even if they're idiots, for the sake of the relationship, but every time I did that people thought I was finally "cured" of my INTJ self, so disappointment ensured when I reverted to my true self.
I think too many people brag about being INTJ, even if they aren't, because they use this type as an excuse to be an a$$. "I don't like you, and don't judge me coz I'm an INTJ." That sort of thing. They don't know how lonely it can be. I don't mean being alone. I have people I hang out with, eat lunch with, etc. But the loneliness comes from the lack of depth in conversations, from the general unwillingness to discuss ideas, etc. That's why I like RUclips. I listen to people like Ben Shapiro or Jordan Peterson to get my dose of "depth" for the day, then I'm all set for the small talk. It's not an ideal life, but it's survival.
That said, I wish people would seduce me more often. And I don't mean that in the sexual way. It's difficult to find true friends as an INTJ. You have to be a kind of "old soul" if you know what I mean.
You perfectly said it all (an infj female who struggles with her dominant Ni so, I do understand all what you said here)
Jonathan Bowen Don't worry I'm not a super fan of Shapiro and Peterson. I'm turning 36 next month so I'm not exactly gullible. As a Catholic I also like Bishop Barron. Sometimes I listen to history podcasts but stay away from conspiracy theories. I used to be a philosophy major so when the Internet has nothing else to offer I go back to the "originals" like Plato.
In my experience, small towns are the worst. Stay away from lonely old women. Regarding cities, I think it depends on your circle of friends. I'm not exactly actively looking for friends anymore though. If I meet some, good. If not, that's all right. I have a 1 year old dog so I'm not exactly dying from loneliness, and as a Catholic I'm forced to go out every week to go to mass.
FYI, priests are good to have an intellectual conversation with since they're required to study philosophy too, so we have that in common, but as a single woman it's not a good idea to befriend a priest. The gossip is not worth the conversation.
You have a good point about INTJs usually not being developed, but I think the older an INTJ gets the better he becomes. (I used to be very immature too so I'm not going to judge) However, given my age I'm not exactly interested in befriending 20 somethings.
@@krdiaz8026 Age is just a number, stupidity and arrogance know no age
Find an ENFP, we love INTJ and we are the complement for you guys, you will see!
some intj people are complete assholes- an intj
“If you sense Fe ignorance coming, then just step in to lessen the impact”
INFJ: hold my beer
Haha! Brilliant, hope you enjoyed the video.
My GF of 6 years is An INFJ.
Its helped alot...
Accurate!
I'm INTJ, my sister fortunately is INFJ. She became a bridge between me & all those things..
I just realized that INFJ's have Te as their PoLR, and INTJ's have Fe as their PoLR.
I think it's a good reason to become friends. We cover the other's PoLR with Our Aux. :)
I like the part when you said that you handle the small talks and then when it gets too technical you would pass it on to your INTJ friend cause that's literally me! I love explaining things to people but hate the small talks, you guys made a great duo!
@@NathanJGlass nathan what is your mbti?
I love having my hair stroked... the only touching I won’t instantly get uncomfortable with...
Same.
Exactly me. It is bizarre just how similar other INTJs are to me...
I hate having my hair touch and face also
Same
I can’t even have anyone step in my direction before I glare at them and cringe away awkwardly😑
This sounds exactly like an INTJ I used to be involved with. We got along really well. Dang! Great job explaining, Nathan.
“...so we both float into the room like two spirits from the underworld” 😂🤣 Nice visual!
INTJ: Be gentle, it's my inferior functions first time...
I know I was like 0_0 but also 0///0
I am an INTJ woman and I find that I naturally gravitate towards a uniform idea. I will get into ruts where I wear the exact same types of outfits repeatedly for years before changing anything up. Heck I have been known to eat the same thing for lunch for a year or more just because I don't have to think about it. I think it is possibly less common in women INTJs but it definitely is a true statement for me.
I eat the same thing for lunch about 5 days in a row, and then switch up. Same for breakfast and dinner. That's kinda crazy.
True for me too
I am an INTJ and I pick whatever clothes I first saw in the morning inside my wardrobe because I just don't like choosing it takes too much of my time and it's just ridiculous.
I think that's why it's best to optimize your wardrobe as not to waste your decision making energy on irrelevancy.
"going out on a date and still have time left for the intj to finish whatever projects she/he has"
Too accurate.
“Black suit, black shoes, black SOUL” 🤣
I loved your video! It’s very well thought and truthful, at least in my experience. The only think I don’t find myself doing, is wearing the same look everyday. Seemingly, I have a well developed Se from practicing dance and plastic arts, so I love experimenting new things with my outfits, though I always strike to give away one “vibe” (If that makes sense). Anyway, I’m definitely checking out more of your videos. 👌
I love my INTJ bf. Once he opens up and you try to understand him well, he is one of of the sweetest, most caring (in a very specific way) person ever. He actively helps to achieve my goals in life and is all in all, super supportive.
-An INTP
As an INTP who had the INTJ door slammed, make sure to keep your game tight. But by god do I wish you the best.
That relationship was wonderous and absolutely devastating to lose.
INTJ girl here. I can CONFIRM everything mentioned here. Especially that last part about signature outfit. I am 14 years old and over a year I wear same things. My mom gets angry about the fact that I dont wear differnt clothes. But I still do. If you wanna seduce us. THE BEST WAY IS TO START A PHILOSOPHICAL CONVERTATION. DO NOT DO SMALL TALK. LASTLY, WE KNOW THAT WE DON'T TALK A LOT. THAT'S NOT BECAUSE OF ME, THATS BECAUSE OF YOU WHO IS NO INTERESTED IN CONSPIRACY THEORIES. Thank you for coming to my ted talk
I enjoyed your Ted Talk very much ~ Nathan
What an insightful Ted Write
INTJs hate the sound of lip smacking or chewing and they will fight you on that lol
Doesn't everyone?
I know! My sister hates me swallowing!
M4D RuSSiAn and, no. Not everyone cares about that. Infps don't care about it at all! Unless they're paranoid.
@@feigekatarina5745 That's strange since it's pretty much universal manners to not chew out loud, with intj's only being 2% doesn't seem likely that they're the only ones who don't like this.
@@iliya2098 It is only universal in your world. I read that Asians make slurping sounds, to signify that they are enjoying what they are having/drinking
Love the channel man, would love to see even more INTJ videos. You break down internal thought patterns very well. Keep it up!
omggg just realized that you aree soooo intj
Hi ikenna bro
"The inferior function needs to be handled... delicately. You have to coax it out of its shell, but don't overwhelm it."
This is the key to open the shell.
Well said.
I wish everyone understood this about INTJs.
As an INTJ-A: Never, ever underestimate our power to adapt and overcome anything we don't like, nor our ability to learn the usefulness or enjoyment of things we don't naturally gravitate towards. It just (generally) takes the right person to expose us. Example:
I dated an ISFP for 6 years. She loved clubs, dancing, parties, people, and her laugh was loud enough to hear in the middle of a rock concert...10 blocks away.
A match made in hell for an INTJ...or is it?
She was also extremely sensual and artistic, as well as very, very open to hearing theories and ideas. She would sit and listen to me rant for hours about stuff I learned over the weekend, theories, and ideas. She encouraged all of my pursuits and cheered my successes and encouraged me to overcome my failures.
She exposed me to things slowly. To cooking delicious, gourmet meals. To going out to fancy restaurants. To enjoying dressing up and clothes shopping. To understanding that spending a lot of money on things (if you have it) is OKAY even if its just for purely pleasure or aesthetic's sake! To going to clubs and learning how to dance.
God I revolted against all of this for years...but she gently and quietly exposed me, more and more over time.
Eventually, this rubbed off on me. I began to understand the emotional, aesthetic side of life. The "living just for lifes sake" ideology.
One of the absolute best nights of my life was at a club in Vegas with her. Dancing, drinking, loud music, shoulder to shoulder people on the floor.
Feeling a connection to everyone around us, dancing to the beat, mingling with people, going crazy and letting loose. I had an absolute BLAST!
We broke up for unrelated reasons from our personalities. But I can honestly say, if you are an INTJ... EXPOSE YOURSELF.
There is a whole world of enjoyment out there you can learn to participate in and not hate, and it will make you MORE EFFECTIVE and EFFICIENT at doing and achieving all of the things you desire.
Imagine having both the genius to come up with simple ideas to complex things, the ability to learn anything to build or carry out those ideas, AND the ability to enjoy being charismatic, emotionally intelligent, and charming enough to lead people or win people over to help you put it all together.
It isn't that INTJs hate these things. Its actually that we hate how hard it is for us to learn and appreciate them, when everything else comes so quickly and effortlessly. We are actually just too lazy to overcome what we don't understand or know how to do. That's why we need a mentor who is an expert in these things.
Just do it slowly and preferably with someone you trust and who is patient enough to expose you slowly, over time.
Every INTJ needs a close dual in their life to balance them out.
Very well-written!
Being an ENFP with an INTJ husband is hilarious. We’re so different yet we flow so well together. I love going out to dance and vibe to good music. He also loves to go out and vibe to good music but he likes to watch everyone have a good time. When I was just getting to know him, I worried that he wasn’t enjoying himself so I’d keep asking him how he’s doing but I came to understand that he genuinely loves to hangout that way. He’ll watch me dance, join sometimes and then go back to lounging 😎 Whenever we’re at a party or a larger hangout, we’re always doing our own thing, talking to different people and then checking in on each other from time to time or just eyeing each other from afar 😉 It’s so fun to catch up afterwards. He’s sort of an extroverted introvert. He gets excited to go out but he does it his own way
Ooooh I felt this! Yum! I can't wait to have my own INTJ maaaaaayn! Raaawr
Good pointers, INTJ approved. My boyfriend is an ENxP and his ability to make up for what I lack in social graces is unbelievably valuable.
I tend to most like people that love to share facts and especially those who like to explore an idea as objectively as possible. .. Those who understand the value of a devil's advocate in thoroughly working through an idea, without getting all emotional about the debate. It's utterly rare to find people like that though... *sigh*
Aww thaaaaanks!
Creating an "outfit" was one of the best decisions. It saves so much time and effort in the morning and I automatically look professional (good is debatable). Black jeans, black long sleeved top and comfortable black boots. Then buy 5 of everything (minus the boots) so I don't have to do the washing during the week.
Always wore black from the time I was an adolescent. Wondered for a long time why I could never feel comfortable in anything else until I found I was INTJ. I force myself every so often to experiment with other colors, but they are always dark or neutral at best : Midnight blue, hunter green, dark burgundy, dark gray, etc. But I like to be in the shadows, behind the scenes, so wearing bright or loud tints or shades will likely never be a thing.
I enjoyed your story with your INTJ friend. I thought it illustrated your point excellently. I was like, "Ahh yes. The age old story of the Ni-Master Plan being undone by our ultimate nemeses - Fe and Inferior Se." 😒
"Fund our world domination." Made me crack a laugh.
You nailed it. The best way to seduce an INTJ is to get physical. We value logic, reason, rational and responsible behaviors so much that the only way to break into our hearts is through our senses: impede our ability to rationalize anything and everything.
INTJ girl I also wear the same thing every day lmao. Have been doing this since I was around 11
Love it when my theoretical ramblings turn out to match reality! ~ Nathan
Ha same 😂😂😂👌
Same. Got so much cr@p for it in high school.
“Swatted away quite effortlessly” made me crack up, as an INTJ I agree with that part
This is spot on but I'd like to make a few observations. Some of us are softer than the textbook INTJ and are able to catch up social cues... And we hate uncomfortable silences. The thing is that most of us are really bad at handling them. You don't even have to talk about astrophysics, politics or some big fundamental issue, you can just go about your day but as long as you are actually invested in the conversation and fill the silences... We're yours. All the people I've had relationships or friendships with share that trait.
Even if not all of us wear the same everyday (at least not me lol) a signal that an INTJ likes you is that they put a little more effort into their appearance when they spend time with you (a little bit of make up, different hairstyle, different sweater) it doesn't only apply to INTJ's but it's specially noticeable in us.
This is a very stupid thing to say but I love your eyebrows and I lost focus on what you were saying a couple times because I was so concentrated on them lol
İ thought i was the only one to think so xD
Flirting??? 😀
@@stevedavenport1202 If so it'd be a sad attempt at flirting lol
@@TheElenaNumb AHAAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
**slowly raises hand** Guilty as charged too
I was fascinated by the eyebrows too.
This is true, my sister is INTJ and she loves going on hikes and doing physical activities with her bf. I'm INFJ and I'm not into that at all, lol.
As an INTJ lady, I approve of it. Physical activities are an integral part of me.
Yeah hiking ftw! Anything outdoorsy really. But food as mentioned in the vid, that's not gonna win me over, that was the one miss in the vid for me. Food is lame. Outdoor adventure = life at its bestest and realest.
@@juweriakalim5423 INTJ female here. I like hiking while listening to music.
I'm an INTJ and my older sister is an INFJ dang.
6:12 It's definitely an INTJ thing. I dress better now because I try to collect "special" pieces and I still manage to find the same and "correct" aura while being WAY more expressive with my looks. I definitely dress better than most people I know and it really doesn't take that much time for me to get ready.
I just discovered your seducing series last night and I was thinking, "Damn, I wish he would make one for INTJ next" I wake the next morning and what do you know, it's right there! Lmao thanks!
@@NathanJGlass squeals and fangirls*
I don't like all this "interest" in the INTJ personality type I have been seeing from women. What is the real underlying reason for that?
@@mariobros7834 I'm not looking to seduce an INTJ, I am one. That's why I wanted to see what he had to say about it. Have there really been many women interested in men with that personality type? I haven't noticed.
@@zinniasegura7508 well, to begin with, odds are you are not among that group of only 0.8% of the population. There are so many INFJs and so many female INTJs in the internet that the numbers simply do not add up.
I also don't see how an INTJ would not notice that discrepancy in every single comment section of popular MBTI videos, in a clown world of disposable free-ranging pawns in a giant tax farm desperate for the illusion they are unique and special.
@@mariobros7834 Where did you get the 0.8% statistic, 16personalities.com? Well they are the same website that typed me. The old and updated versions gave me the same results. These tests are sometimes wrong, and I acknowledge that, but then that brings up the possibility that their female INTJ statistic is wrong as well. I'm the person who knows myself the best, and if I'm wrong in identifying as an INTJ, how should I even know what type I am? Does anyone even really know what type they are? Are MTBI types bullshit? I'm sure there's some people out there that choose a type because it makes them feel like a special snowflake, but at the same time, INTJ and INFJ types are the ones that are typically most interested in studying this kind of information. I know plenty of people with other personalities that find out what they are and don't even care to examine it further, which is why you don't ever see certain types in the comments section even though they are way more common in the population.
1. know their values
2. emotional translator (acting as buffer for intjs - having Fe awareness)
3. taking care of their sensory
4. appearance manager - convince intjs to have signature look to look good without much effort
Ah yes the signature look ❤️ All my clothes look like they're one single designer collection, even though most were dirt cheap from thrift stores lol. Basically anything goes with anything, so no time wasted trying to match stuff, I just pick whatever suits the weather. Mostly black/white/red (teeny tiny touches of blue or green), always plain colours, not patterns or graphics,. I especially love it when I can buy the same thing in both black and white. My ideal with clothes is to find the perfect match between formal/classy and super comfy and practical.
Exactly, and if there are more colours in the same thing even better. Always look good with very little effort.
I've spent an extra $30 to buy running shoes in black version, because all 6 regular colours offered online were like a crazy mix of bright colours (like most running shoes) made to impress others with stylish fitness gear. LOL
This video is spot on, I greatly appreciate your commentary on the INTJ and being one myself this has improved my understanding of my natural tendencies.
Oh wow. 1:53 INTJs (Me) can talk once you get them started on their values and/or conspiracy theories. Yes! I went on a 1st date with a man I like (he’s INTP) and the conversation went on for 6 hrs! We were only supposed to meet for happy hour. Our 2nd date, same thing! Only that time he did most of the talking while I sipped a glass of wine nodding. A lot. 🥰❤️
Any tips for an INTP (myself) currently seeing an INTJ woman?
@@mr.e5595 1. State your opinions and reasoning fearlessly. If you two disagree on a point, then expound more. Also allow her the fullness of time to make a point / argument before you make a judgment. Don't do that snap judgment thing when she makes a point you don't like or the dismissive shrug off and silence like INTPs sometimes do. 2. Remember that neither of you really can be bothered building relationships, so you'll have to actually remember to text her 1-2 times a week if you want this thing to have a chance ;)
@@youreworthyourweightinavoc7189 As an INTP with an INTJ best friend, I can confirm the INTJ hatred for interruption. In a heated debate, his INTJ lectures can get insufferable and as an INTP, I already got the gist of his argument ages before he finishes. Regardless, don't interrupt. Not good for friendships and definitely not good for romantic partnerships.
@@Chatoyancify
cuz no matter how you get the gist just listen because it shows how u respect them same with others
yass you’re giving me hope - INTP girl who is into an INTJ
This guy is one of the few people I have seen actually do a good job explaining INTJ's correctly. And your right about the outfit thing and I am an INTJ female so definitely not just a guy thing.
This guy likes this comment a lot... ~ Nathan
I am an INTJ female and I wear the same clothes every day. (Multiple sets of very similar items, clean of course)
OOOOHHHH!!!! I FOUND THE REASON WHY MY INTJ MOTHER ENCOURAGE ME TO BUY THE SAME SHIRT/PANT/PAR OF SOCKS IN EVERY POSSIBLE COLOUR ONCE I'VE LIKED ONE....
I actually DO go stretches wearing the same thing every day. I have multiples of pants, shirts, etc.
I sometimes try to switch it up so that people don't just think I'm nasty and never wash my clothes. OTOH, sometimes I just outright tell people, "I have four of this shirt." Depends on how often I see them.
One thing people don't seem to understand, including the Host is that it is us-INTJs who can understand others eventually and not the other way around. Also if you don't act naturally around us, we will see right through it, which makes all your advice only valid for people who would actually do those things you suggested on a regular basis and not only because of the INTJ...
So INTJ's are the onlu type that can understand others? Yeah right, says the INFP.
Ha, ha, ha. INTJ female here... If I like a pant, a sweater, or a shirt, I get it in all the colors it comes. Problem solved.
An INTJ will NEVER just walk into a situation as you described and pass out their business cards. We assess constantly and change our strategies as needed.
Yes but we are also likely to get stuck on what to change in situation like that.
I have an INTJ friend from work and despite having a little bit of a rough start, once I gave her the space to take our relationship to the friend level if she wanted (4 years), shes one of the closest friends I have now. I love having deep chats with her about current events or political stuff and theorizing different possibilities.
She doesn't like going out on her days off, but she told me if I planned everything, she'd go with me. We went to the beach and had snacks and caught up with each others personal lives. She even brought a really specific soda she knew I liked, which was very sweet.
As an INTJ female I can attest to loving the idea of a simplified wardrobe. To avoid having to deal with shopping I have Stitch-fix regularly send me a box of clothes so someone who cares more about fashion can tell me what to wear.
It sounds like you're describing a very young INTJ. A teenager or early 20-something. Most will grow out of half the things you listed, and many will develop the ability to evaluate groups of people just like any other system an INTJ loves to analyze, social nuance and all. After that, the only hurdle is finding the patience to put on a silly suit and fake smile and play nice for social events like job fairs.
You nailed it, at least for this INTJ. Having someone around who can help navigate this crazy, irrational world of people is such a help. It's interesting that in terms of the 'Five Love Languages' my love tank is filled by acts of service. Helping with boring tasks like taking the trash out means so much to me. It spares me from having to interact with the sensory world in a useless way. Mental and emotional acts of service are exceptionally helpful. Like you said, having someone who can break the ice for me, divert attention away from me for idle chit-chat. The most seductive thing a person can do is intercede on my behalf in a social setting. I get weak-kneed just thinking about it *L*.
I mean I love nailing it... so to speak. Glad you enjoyed the video! ~ Nathan
Me, an INTJ, while watching the video: *nodding furiously at everything he says*
Male INTJ thoughts toward clothes.
fashion=irrelevant
social gathering=socially accepted outfit (question: Is there going to be anyone we like who will be offended? no=comfortable)
work=uniform
time at home=comfortable
performing activity with others=utility for activity
Again, jesus, most excellent. I'm not only impressed by your content, I'm impressed by the fact that you impressed me.
INTJ woman here.
On the subject of dates: I also really love the idea of a date involving high-quality food. I generally stick to the same foods that I know are exceptionally nutrient-dense; I've researched what type of diet I should eat to balance my hormones and autoimmune condition to the point that I stay in my own little world with food. However, I really enjoy going out and eating those foods prepared in a different, elevated way or appreciating nice presentation. My favorite places to go are usually sushi bars, a quiet corner, where my date and I care share small plates and conversation. An all-you-can-eat sushi place is a great way to try something new (for a flat fee) without feeling like you're going to lose $20 to a roll you may not like once it arrives. Both adventurous and low risk on monetary loss. For non-food ideas, I once took my now-spouse on a date where we made our own signature scent lotion together. I have a niche interest in olfactory research so I was able to talk about the psychology behind different notes. He (an INFP!) indulged me and it felt like I could teach someone :) I walked around with the lotion's note 'recipe' in my wallet with a copy of our wedding vows for the longest time since it was very special to me.
Definitely the most accurate INTJ explanation video I’ve ever seen. Great examples. Pretty much everything you said hits the nail right on the head.
I, as an INTJ, approve everyone to use these instructions.
This is so embarrassingly accurate that I was uncomfortable - and I watched it alone haha!
And I wear the same v neck shirt in a different color every day for the last 12 years - so yeah haha
Hi there!
Thank you for your great content. I'm leaving a comment here because this particular video made me laugh. Let me explain.
I am an INTP woman married to an INTJ man. We've been together for 6 years, married 1 year. We met thanks to a common INTP man friend, who organized our first encounter, and it follows exactly what you are advising here.
The three of us went for ropes (the climbing trees activity... I'm French, I used Google Translate). Then we had dinner at a great restaurant. Then went to a bar lounge where we talked and talked and talked. As to emotion management, it's exactly this: I am his emotional translator. I'm like a mediator to the world for him. :)
Love that story, btw your English is great! ~ Nathan
Thank you ^^
I'm an INTJ and everything you said was spot on. From similar videos of yours that I've watched, you clearly have an excellent handle on INTJs.
I've received regular comments on how I always wear the same thing. I've also had an unfortunately number of events where everyone was dressed similarly... except for me. I'm clueless about attire. The jeans I am wearing right now may be 15 years out of date, or they may be fine. I have no idea.
We are keenly aware of our weaknesses, so if someone is helpful in those cases, we understand why and will be grateful, not offended.
I've watched some Frank James' videos and he likes to do reactions to a situation from each of the personality types, but I think he whiffs on the INTJ reaction about half the time. When he hits though, he is very funny. So still entertaining.
I loooove conspiracy theories i didn't even know it was an intj thing?
@@NathanJGlass Personally as an INTJ, knowing that other intj's are really into conspiracy theories doesn't make much sense to me as many conspiracies have little to no rationality behind them yet rationality is a key intj trait....strange.
M4D RuSSiAn Thank you for saying that. I’ve been hearing about INTJs liking conspiracy theories but it just seem (well I guess you could say some of them, since others may or may not have some hint of legitimacy) ridiculous to me.
@@iliya2098 Not really! The dominant function of INTJs thrives on subconsciously collecting information and discovering patterns made from said info and conspiracy theories are perfect for feeding that. Seeing things that aren't there but could potentially be... Fun! The idea isn't BELIEVING conspiracies it's ENTERTAINING the idea of a possible reality. Gets the mind going. Hence the interest
@@PK-cg5ej See that would make sense to me, however most conspiracy theories are just simply based on falsehoods and logical fallacies which I would expect unobservant and more irrational people to fall for but not intj's. I think entertaining the idea of conspiracy theories is similar to the idea of astrology, I would never expect an intj to be interested in that so I ascribe the same standards to conspiracies .
Same here.
You have a wonderful grasp of INTJs - well done. From a Female INTJ in a black t-shirt, black jeans and black boots signature outfit.
Yes! Black goes with everything.
The way you said black soul was cute and made me giggle. ~Sincerely ENFP
As an INTJ, I don't exactly wear the same thing everyday, or the same type of shirt etc. But I like my clothes plain so they don't stand out... I hear a lot of people whispering "did you notice they wear the same clothes everyday" about some people so I avoid wearing the same clothes to not draw bad attention
Damn am I the only INTJ that doesn’t mind going out to dance?? I only go maybe once every other month but still it’s fun to go cut loose with friends sometimes. Geez...
Nathan Glass haha, I’ve noticed
I'm with you, girl!
I like being in crowded like party or a park sometimes just to observe people, watch them mostly look happy in those circumstances, so that i feel like human again
You sure you're an intj? Lol I avoid dancing at all costs.
I know how to dance, but I hate it.
Getting the signature look was such a life-changer. Definitely great advice.
i'm an enfp and my boyfriend is an intj and we fell in love through talking about philosophy, politics, ethics, psychology etc and then after 2 years we started talking at a 1mm distance from each other and touched our hands "by accident" and now 1.5 year after my dad be calling him his son at the saturday barbecue
Oh my goodness. You perfected this!
I am an ENFP married to an INTJ. I have been able to help him understand Fe, to an extent, by sharing my knowledge of psychology (my degree), and acting as a buffer between him and his mom. She is an Fe dom... for sure. They do not speak each other's language when trying to communicate. So, I step in as a translator for both of them with each other.
Yet, I also struggle with Fe in most situations. However, I am still slightly better with it than he is, so that helps. He has learned a lot from me with that area over the years and he applies it to other situations now.
For his Se... food and a variety of flavors, hikes, kayaking, camping, campfires, traveling, beach trips, snuggles and cuddles with me, and shared adventures with me (like ziplining, visiting volcanic parks, swimming with stingrays, swimming with dolphins, petting baby penguins, etc.) are his love language.
Also, yes... he can be VERY chatty when he is talking about his pursuits, standing on a soap box about something that has violated a value in his life, and deep diving conspiracy theories. 😂
On another note, we have frequently found this odd situation where he thinks he is correct about something, but I know he is wrong. So, I will share with him why he is wrong amd the correct facts about that subject. He will look it up on the internet and realize I am correct. Or, something will occur that shows him I was correct. He marvels over the fact that I am so often correct in this way. Not because he doubts my intelligence, but because I am the only person he has ever consistenly been wrong around.
It has been a running joke between us in our 11 years of marriage and 14 years of knowing each other... that the reason I am correct so often must be to keep him humble. It's actually so uncanny, that whenever we discover I was wrong and he was right, he asks me to repeat myself after I say, "You were right." It is just so good to his ears since he is so frequently wrong with only me. 😂
So yeah, I have noticed that he is rarely wrong with other people, because he has already thought it through. He also does get agitated when I ask a question (which is funny considering his million questions needed to narrow down information for himself... lol), because he tells me if I simply stay quiet he will answer any question I could possibly have by the time he is done explaining. The problem with that is... context. If he loses me on sentence one, because he gave no context, I can't track with anything else he is saying. So, yes. I agree that once he gets going, questions and/or challenges to information better be well thought out.
As for the outfits... yes. He has been either a pair of jeans and a graphic Tshirt (usually in black, blue or grey), a pair of athletic shorts with the same T-shirts, or a dressed to the nines in a suit kind of guy. He loves his formal wear, but only in formal settings. His everyday look has been the same since I met him.
Knowing he likes the confort of that style, I took him to the mall and found solid colored fitted T-shirts, and more tightly fitting jeans for our date days. We also recently discovered that 3/4 zip pull over sweatshirts look amazing on him. So... his response is to want to buy several of varying shades of red, blue, black and gray so that it matches anything he wears. He is totally the person who will buy several of the same shirt, but in different colors, or several pairs of the same shoes, once he finds something he truly likes. Although, I have often done that myself, so... 🤷♀️
Anyway, thank you for another video giving me insight into my beloved INTJ. These are all things I have noticed, but hearing it spelled out so clearly helps me understand that it is an INTJ thing, verses a like/dislike kind of thing.
Intj female here. I have a bunch of highwaisted black skinny fit pants I wear since they go with everything. I js switch tops...lol. so I guess that's true on the wearing the same thing
It’s not about the problem of the same outfit but about food.
I eat basically the same food everyday, because I only eat what is delicious, healthy, balanced, cheap, easy and quick to prepare, and could be prepared in large amount so I don’t have to cook everyday. Very few food fits the standards and I end up eating the same thing every meal.
(I was typed INTJ but not so sure about this sometimes. I wonder if other INTJs do this
Me, female, INTJ, watching this and just going like god damn it this is so accurate.
Love to hear it when people find our videos accurate! ~ Nathan
Love Who yup it was, accept for the clothing part
That "when I start speaking, you better have a well thought-out point while interjecting or better not interject me or I'll eat your children" thing has been pointed out by my friends a hundred times now. To all of them, I'm cool and calm all the time but if you interrupt me and actually don't have anything clear to say, that's the only time they've seen me raise my voice. Like why you gotta speak if you aint got something to speak.
And that outlook thing, already did that. Dark coloured Jeans or cargos with full sleeves shirts untucked (mostly checked). Perfect outfit everyday for anywhere.
I am an intj Female and I can vouch for myself anyway when I say the dress code is similar for me. It took me a little while to nail it down mostly because I was a single mom who couldn’t afford what I wanted , but at this point in my life my closet is 100% fit and flare dresses and leggings. Occasionally tights nylons or some thigh highs sneak in rotation , but I do not own a single pair jeans, sweatpants, or yoga pants. It’s specifically leggings, tights, and dresses every day. I go to my closet and it’s the next dress hanging up for grabs. that’s what I’m wearing today no thought required and the next day the same. I don’t think about it I know they’re all cuteAnd that I like them all so it takes the guesswork out and I’m happy. I do often catch some flak from other intj females ( 2) that I’ve met for appearing much more feminine than the average intj. my dresses can be very “girly” and I do enjoy make up which seems to be out of the norm but it all follows the formula, my formula, that you can guarantee
Hahaha I wear blouses and long-fitted pants everyday and my entire closet consists of blues, greys, black and white, so I guess that's my signature look. I'd like to think I'm able to display empathy and am able to accept that I'm wrong if they can give me a good reasoning. I will ask questions and I expect answers. I handle a lot of the talking with clients and I get to know them to customise designs for them. So, I don't really know if I'm an INTJ, other than that the assessments I've taken had stated so. Although, the "date" you proposed sounded very appealing, a walk, dinner, talk about our values and still have time for my work or whatever it is I'm obsessed with at the time.
Ok well this comment certainly gives me some INTJ vibes... just saying... ~ Nathan
" I will ask questions and I expect answers." That's a very 'INTJ' statement 😁
I cannot stress how much I hate loud environments, especially ones with no escape or a quiet room. If my ears start ringing, I will have a mental breakdown.
What I love most in the world is being on date with someone at my home, that way I feel comfortable and I can control the environment. I can control the volume, the food (I'm a picky eater), and have no reason to stress.
Take care bro, I'm an intj too. I also hate the things u hate. But if it's causing u mental breakdowns frequently, make sure u be aware your mental health. Don't just say I am an intj and ignore all the signs.
I have panic attack and depression once. Too bad I was too young and have no idea what I was facing. I wish I could found out about this earlier.
Lucky I found love and hope from the people who knows how to care an intj.
Seek help when needed.
Love,
INTJ
@@mr.popoballballl745 I've actually found that I'm autistic, which explains so much.
The sensory overload, hating loud or crowded environments, the anxiety and depression.
Yeah, no wonder why I was so hellbent on knowing I was an INTJ, it matches up with autism so well.
But yeah, I've really been watching my mental health recently. Making sure I don't get overwhelmed and have a shut down.
@@rae8961 good to know u are well aware of yourself, takecare bro.
Thank you for the video! This describes my INTJ husband so well, especially the part about social events and interacting with people. I often find myself reading the situation to try and make sure it's harmonious!
I knew my cooking skills would come in handy! And my Fe awareness doesn’t hurt either. #ENTP
klj788986sbb ENTPs are the best!
Sofia No u ❤️
yes, my pet ENTP also cooks well.
@@mariobros7834 omg! My entp friend can cook too! He made grilled cheese like my grandma!
I have heard from several sources that ENTPs generally make good cooks (or at least, we tend to enjoy cooking). We might not be quite so good at baking, but cooking is great because it allows you to experiment (Ne), you learn from each cooking session and can come up with your own methods and recipes (Ti), you can brag about your skills and make friends and family happy (Fe) and following a recipe and paying attention to the details also appeals to our least developed function (Si).
For feeling connected I go to my INFJ, absolutely invaluable! For 'deep' I have my ISFJ who improves me. Married an ISTJ. 5 stars recommend.
I'm an intj girl and the appearance manager thing would be incredible. I literally wear the same outfit/kind of outfit literally everyday i don't like thinking about what I'm going to wear. I'm all for practicality and function, which translates to all i own are black pants, sneakers, hoodies and shirts with the occasional appearance of grey or white. Please someone just help me buy all the same clothes at a reasonable price point and let me not have to think about the paradoxical nature of fashion.
I am a female INTJ and agree with several other women on when it comes to clothes/outfits. I usually have a uniform type of outfit system and it lessens decision fatigue and stress. I wear very similar clothes and tend to keep it within black, grey, navy, and/or dark green.
I have a very delicate mannar to back up my beliefs.I hate when people start to talk to me and then sush me out when i start talking i seriously hope that every intj somehow finds a person who listens to you no matter what. Also being a emotional goof in front of us will not make you a bad person and would rather make me feel more comfortable around you. I may not be able to open up my emotions at first but if I see a person trusting there emotions to me it would strengthen our relationship. What I value the most In a person has to be loyality, honesty and trust I mean these are the three thing which matter to me the most atleast I dont know about other intj's. So in my personal opinion if a person is upfront with there emotions and is honest and trust worthy that is all I need.
I am 14. I am surrounded by people who think i am rude to talk and rationalize my belifes when challenged. This has made me a Misanthrope. I am not self diagnosing.
Okay so this is cringe to read at sorry about this istg I have matured-
I think you just need to find someone who understands you well. It will worth the wait.
@@desiliana2925 yeah.
About appearance. As an INTJ woman, I also like to wear the same type of clothes every day. My preferred colour is black, but white in the summer time. Dressing up for me is all about silhouette, overall look and quality. Although I don't want to be noticed.
I want to go outside but I have to peek out the door or window to make sure no one is there so I won’t have to talk to them. I can do it if I have to but non-INTJs are so exhausting...
This was extraordinarily helpful! Thank you.
This is really great to hear, hopefully you enjoy the other content on our channel too! ~ Nathan
I’m an INTJ. I wear black sweatpants and a black crew neck everyday.
That’s a pretty solid outfit if you ask me! ~Nathan
I love that most of the people in the comments section are INTJs. Of course we would haha
Was that seducing an INTJ, or helping him out of his misery?! lmao
- *We love sensory stuff* ; used to dance with friends and battle on the streets with strangers, which was gradual, but was way overwhelmed to go to a dance party at a night club, usually being forced, *don't overwhelm us!* - check
- Fi underestimated, a fiery passion behind it all, "Te" is just a tool, and it floods with emotions, inappropriately expressed if ANY- check
- Lectures, Lectures, Lectures, yes no matter how we try to NOT TO, we still are overwhelmed by how that full picture of a thing in our heads needs to be delivered and precisely digested; not superiorly feeling it's for your own good; not a vent up, or merely a selfish gain; it's what we direly see is good FOR EVERYBODY.
= Being hesitant or rather *introspective* is a learnt quality over the time, but once gained, it's done properly, and highly appreciated.
- Conspiracy theories, Paranoia, both cause The magic Motive-Goggles is always on with Ni, can lead to these extreme at times.
- *Non movable* after a conclusion lmao. Bruh, you been hours tripping balls with Ni, go have a treat now, move for it later! Ni is way draining - check xD
- "Fe", No comment, you said all perfectly, learning the subtleties.... and most importantly respecting it.
-Me and an INTJ friend can have the same T's for a decade, and we both can start to have cuts here and there, while unaware. Not usually same clothes, but same type -Check!!!!! but when we get to care about it, we temporarily turn into devoted fashionistas.
- Again Fe, as Nathan said, show us you want us to get past what we're blind to. DON'T MANIPULATE US EMOTIONALLY, no really I mean it, we sense it quicker despite not knowing how to deal with it, we hate it to the core! we will be the stereotype you gave us of someone fantasizing genocide😂. jk
Have a good one everybody
Great video as always Nathan!!!!!!!!!!!
"Was that seducing an INTJ, or helping him out of his misery?!"
John Carpenter's "They Live" is the dramatized retelling of an INTJs encounter with aliens.
@@DrVein I'm sleepy but huh?
@@SayyadinaHeresy your name is quite a fact in itself.
@@NathanJGlass Nathan ma man thank you
This sums it up well. I invented some products for the construction industry. At trade shows and in general, my ENFP and ESFP besties/biz partners handle all the small talk, entertaining, and deal making. I'm the technical guy who knows every millimeter of our products, how they work, and why they're better than anything else on the market. They also keep me from wearing jeans and a t-shit to important meetings. 🙈😂
I keep switching between ENFP-ENTP for the past 5 years, and the walk and lunch thing is actually very close to my heart! XD
@@NathanJGlass I have come to believe that it is the introverted/Extroverted feeling function, correct me if i am wronf
@@NathanJGlass And how do i differentiate between the two?
@@NathanJGlass and i am an ENFP at the current moment.
I have also come to notice that during school or while preforming some kind of brain activity for a long time, I am more likely to be an ENTP, while on the off seasons, i test out as ENFP...
It is hilarious to me that there are other people out there like me. I figured I was a total one of a kind freak. I actually straddle the line between INTJ and ENTJ, but a lot of the descriptions for INTJ are bang on for me.
As an INTP, I'm pretty sure every INTJ I've ever interacted with either hated me immediately or we just couldn't get beyond that initial awkward barrier lol.
Now I'm having a hard time seeing how INTPs and INTJs are supposed to get along after seeing this video. I usually like to interject stories/lecturers with friends by asking questions to make sure I'm accurately understanding what they're telling me. I'm likely to poke holes (if I find any) into people's logic without thinking twice about it. Basically everything you said not to do, I do it naturally.
So what usually makes INTPs and INTJs get along?
I've never initiated with an INTJ; they always initiate with me so it's hard for me to say what the initial draw might be. However, I know once their Ni sees a purpose for you in their future and you make your way into their Fi they will refuse to leave you. Seems like they decide they want to marry you within a few weeks, then take another 6 months to admit it lol.
From my own personal experience, the INTJ is likely to see the INTP as: smart, loyal, trustworthy, and honest. Those last 2 seem to be huge with the INTJs I've known. I've even had one specify that he considered being "honest with yourself" one of the most important forms of honesty and I guess INTP's Ti makes them highly attuned to honesty and removing bias, even though they can also be arrogant pricks.
I usually get along pretty well with INTJs at first and then as I get to know them better more conflict develops as their neurosis and paranoia make me roll my eyes inadvertently, and their jumping to conclusions and caring too much about what others think (in the Te sense, not the Fe sense) grates on my nerves.
But on a basic level, they're both highly cerebral types who understand the need for alone time and both appreciate peace and quiet. Neither type will care much when the other wears the same thing every day (though the INTJ will care more when the INTP doesn't shower lol). Both types kinda sorta hate most people. And both types will relate to each other in having similar dating struggles. INTPs can help INTJs with their Fe in a way that isn't totally overwhelming. And INTJs have the actual impetus and drive to take the INTPs theoretical ideas and make them a reality.
You're right that they don't like being interrupted and tend to take it personally when you correct them. But once you can prove you are correct and they come to understand it's a form of helping rather than undermining or sabotaging, they will respect your opinion. It just takes forever to prove to them you don't have evil ulterior motives. We also tend to speak in a way that we see as just being intellectually honest and logically defensible, while they tend to describe it as "careful" wording, as if they think we're up to something or hiding something. Oh and they hate it when you're late or throw a wrench in their well-thought out plans. Those can also be sources of conflict. But any intertype dynamic will have some conflict. In summary, I'd say it takes a while to earn their trust and get them to value you, but once they do, you're golden.
@@heatherbryant4197 interesting. Usually I'm the one that's trying to analyze for ulterior motives. It seems like INTJs take that to an even further level than me lol. And the summary about proving you're actually useful sounds pretty similar to how you have to prove yourself to ENTJs as well. But ENTJs have definitely been much easier for me to get that point across to than INTJs.
But yeah, I can't even make it to that point with them so far. Their judgement seems so quick that it feels like I don't really have a chance, with first impressions not really being my strong suit. I really prefer to study different types in person on top of learning about them online
My husband is INTP and I'm INTJ. We really gel intellectually/philosophically. The issue is that we only worked platonically in the long run: now we're separated but still living together as friends.
INTJs have an Ne nemesis that basically functions as social and sensory paranoia. Do they ask you questions like, "What do you want from me?" or "Can I help you?"
We're very prickly when you're first getting to know us.
Perhaps that's what you're running into. It often comes off as us being stuck up when we're really just shy and paranoid.
Edit: I'm going to be crucified for using the word "shy". By it I mean "elusive" and "avoidant".
I am an INTJ (female) while my older brother is INTP. When we go to coffee shops together we usually stay for hours debating and arguing and usually I come out of the cafe with a huge headache. Sometimes I can't stand him because he keeps saying "It depends how you look it" or "yes and no" "actually that's not entirely true" in every topic we discuss. The debates get heated up when we talk about morality and values (he's more open to anything) while I'm set on a standard of moral values. Sometimes it can be tough but honestly, INTP has been one of the very very very few types that I can actually hold a deep and heated debate with. Most types will shut it down and would rather do something fun or relaxing. So it's more of a love-hate relationship but overall we are learning a lot from each other. However I don't think I would ever want to date and INTP.