Much needed video, so many women (including me) make their excuses for them just because of some bs they fed us in the first week of talking ignoring how they haven't followed up on one of those things
Seriously! I love when they feed us the "yea, I'm looking for a relationship too" b.s., and then weeks later it still hasn't happened. They're a bunch of liars that know how to tell us what we want to hear.
Exactly what I needed to read so that I can stop checking my phone for possible missed calls that seem to have finally stopped after a week of ignoring him. So hard to stand my ground, but if I am always arguing with him and calling him a POS (he's a narcissist anyway), then yes, he is NOT the one and it's probably the loss that makes me still want him since I never really had him. Oh the games we still play sometimes, so annoying.
3 years ... it took 3 years to let go. And once i did he suddenly had time too meet up. Smh Ignored his ass and he started to text my best friend so he could talk to me. Lol If he REALLY wanted to talk. He knows where i’m living ☺️ Why men always come back around when you stop caring and suddenly want to put effort ? I know thats not always the case but curious tbh
They always put their best effort into you in the beginning. That's how they get you. You're still a chase, but once the chase stops and he has you he gets bored and leaves. He doesn't want you but likes the access to you whether he wants your attention or sex but once you stop caring about him and move on he suddenly wants you back? He doesn't miss you he just misses whatever it is that you did for him. He didn't care before when he had you bc he figured you weren't going anywhere, but now you left so he wants to prove to himself that he can still have you if he tries hard enough. But I promise once you show him that he's got you still he'll disappear again. people want what they can't have
@@shutit4024 a guy did the same thing to me. He led me on and ghosted me. Strung me along for 5 more months before I had enough and moved on and met someone 2 months later then the asshole tried coming back wanting another chance. He tried a few times actually telling me I was the one who got away. He did apologize for how he treated me. I accepted his apology but I told him to move on bc I already did and this was 5 years later lol. He finally got the hint.
I've had the talks and gave the ultimatum and his actions basically ripped my heart out and threw it away. He's taking me for granted but I'm not giving any assets🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️
Thank you, thank you, thank you for this video, explicit words and all because they're needed lol. I truly like what you said about throwing a wrench in the pattern and being willing to change because the other person is clearly not going to. All of this seems to be common sense but can get lost when it's happening to you in the moment, but it's time to wake up and see their actions clearly for what they are. "Throw the wrench, change the pattern, kick that M-F-er to the curb"!
I called him out and gave him the ultimatum and he said “I respect your decision” 🙄 so AKA you’re telling me I’m RIGHT when I called you out for giving me the bare minimum and that I deserve better
You are AWESOME!!!!!! Thank you so much for your videos. Whoever she is, the woman who has the blessing of having you as a partner in her life is ONE HAPPY and LUCKY LADY.🥰
My recent ex would send endless texts proclaiming his adoration of me, I was his "everything, he wanted to build and grow with me" But then, chose guy friends, sports, drinking over me every time. Over a 2 week period, I couldn't even get a 5 minute phone call or an in-person meeting to properly breakup with him. I was forced to do so via text. It just means he really didn't like me and did not mean what he said
I threw a wrench in the works once and said 'sort your shit I'm going' and followed through. He didn't change his ways, because (as he said) "now I have nothing to change for" and he just got worse with the partying and running wild... the heck? Elliot I did everything right here
He’s just not your guy. If you leave, and he doesn’t fix his behavior, he just doesn’t give a damn. And you will find as you get older, if you have to leave a guy, it’s most likely he doesn’t care at all. I experienced this with every man I’ve ever dealt with in my 27 years old being married and/or dating, and so has my sister. A man who loves you won’t f*ck it up. He just won’t. Men who need 2nd chances are the men who don’t deserve them. A woman can do everything right and be the most wonderful girl in the world, and none of that matters, because you’re not what he’s looking for. Men who want to party and run wild do it with women who want the same things. Men are very self oriented. He’s not gonna change for you. He’s not gonna do anything he doesn’t absolutely, 100% want to do. He’s not gonna sacrifice anything for you. Men only do those things in the movies. In real life, they are who they are, and who they are at age 20 is pretty much gonna be who they are at age 70. Men don’t change; they just change women hoping to find one who will take him as is with no improvement.
@@toscadonna wow, you're totally right. Thanks for putting it so well also. In my case they don't seem to really love me or care, but will lie and manipulate and pretend they do for me to stick around. Actions always speak louder than words I guess
It's good to consider that having integrity (words and actions lining up) have more to do with that person's character and not what the other person is doing. It's quite probable that they may reflect this type of behavior in all areas of their life. In dating, it's good to look at someone for who they are and not take responsibility for their character traits. E.I. selecting the proper partner for you and not trying to change them or yourself to be something desired.
Elliott....Please explain more specifically, what you mean by giving him the chance to miss you. I know you mean to pull away, but for how long 1 month, 2 months, more?? What do we do if during that time he texts or calls? Do we answer?? Please help us for those who "Suck" at being with men.
Yeah you do answer. But you cultivate your own life without him. This includes dating other men. Elliot says when I truly loves you and sees you as his wife etc, he won’t put himself in the position to lose you.
I really feel like he doesn't care that much. I feel like he doesn't care if I was to walk away .. he doesn't even console me when I'm sad. He just freezes up anyways. Since the start of our relationship he's been saying he will do this and that but it takes him a year to do it. I knew his actions didn't match up with his words from the start. I just had hope though. And I still hold onto that hope three years later. Nothing much had changed. He keeps giving me time frames for when he will quit vaping, and let's himself down each time. He's not even ready to move out . He's not ready for commitment. He's told me straight to my face actually, and I've been ignoring it this whole time.. he keeps saying he's not ready yet. He's young. He doesn't have enough money or a stable job. I keep telling him we can do it together. He chosen to have freebies at his house and take advantage. Even though we both don't have the best households. He's not ready to take the leap into buying our first apartment and we've been dating for almost 3 years. Known eachother for 7. I don't know how much more of this I can take.. I just feel more like a friend to him than a girlfriend right now.
Can you make a video about dating a man who’s suddenly dealing with grief. All communication has stopped. Your insight would be greatly appreciated. I’ve made it clear that I care but he barely talks to me now
@AliSand How’s the night club party men working out for you? I always see you commenting on several channels so it’s clearly not going well. Good luck.
Loved, "Cut that mother effer off". Get over your ego, so you can cut that, pretend he's not a player off. He'll respect you more, because if he cut you off easily, he's used to playing easy girls anyways, and he knows you'll keep defeating him, because you're not easy, so he'd rather save face like the coward he is, then face a real Women he feels he's not good enough for. He's looking for several girls with very little minds, that will give their body to him. Speaking your mind is intimidating to guys that participate in mindless sex like this, chasing low value Women eventually turns them mindless. Successful Men have 1 good Woman behind them. Concentrate on attracting success, don't make yourself not good enough for successful Men, by playing around with these broke Boys.
Nope, it's not "emotional?" For us it's like, we've put in and invested, so it's not so easy to pull out of the relationship? It's just like a loved one dying in all sudden accident....you've invested all this time & energy, and now it's gone in a blink of an eye!! It's a shock, basically😒
I put forth effort but he puts forth effort but not noticeable efforts. He does it quietly and behind the scenes. I do it outwardly and boldly. Is there a way we can come together?
My crush is a shy guys and would always have good body language around me, and make more jokes when he was near me last school year. We haven’t see each other in person since March (and this year, we don’t have any classes together), and when I text him a meme every couple of days, he just leaves me on read. I just think he’s shy/nervous to text me back. Or does it mean he’s lost interest in me?
Hi Elliot Good Night's From Singapore! What If A Guy Who Been Ghosted, Quiet,Silent Or Distant Wants To Returns After About One Year The Relationship Fizzles Or Have Broken-Up & What If His Actions Does Not Match With His Words If He Keep Playing Or Flirting With Other Woman's Until He Fed-Up Or He Just Playing Stupid Game's Around Different People's? What Does A Guy Have To Take Serious With A Woman Until He Is Not Going To Changed His Behaviour Or Character's If He Is Not Showing Up?
My boyfriend said he was going to take me on a date but he cancelled last time because his back was hurting and so we hung out yesterday he did buy me tacos at a taco truck and I ended having sex with him like a dumbass :( 😞 I wanted to go to Applebee's I told him 😩 but idk im not going to see him unless he sets a date and time and place. He just doesn't see me worth it. I'm so sad again
a lot women automatically get alarmed if a guy missed a day or more from calling or texting I see and here it all the time..then they automatically thinks he's not interested or hes playing games..that's why some ppl relationship fail ppl wanna be around there mate 24/ 7 wanna no his or her every move...FOR WHAT?🤷♀️ Having UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS will cause you Your own EMOTIONAL PAIN AND JOY...dont no man no or woman want no 5stage clinger especially if you dealt with one before it very draining and toxic and you be co - dependent men and women please have your own life that the start to a growing relationship just see or hang out with partner on the weekend..ppl are usually busy during the week anyway...I no this pertain to everyone but just the ones having this issue..
A man who is in love with you calls you every day. Period. Unless he’s deployed into war and has no access to a phone. Men who disappear for days are seeing other women, and the woman should know that and see other men, too.
These types of guys are too flaky and emotionally unavailable. If they let you down all the time ignore them......
Much needed video, so many women (including me) make their excuses for them just because of some bs they fed us in the first week of talking ignoring how they haven't followed up on one of those things
Seriously! I love when they feed us the "yea, I'm looking for a relationship too" b.s., and then weeks later it still hasn't happened. They're a bunch of liars that know how to tell us what we want to hear.
Exactly what I needed to read so that I can stop checking my phone for possible missed calls that seem to have finally stopped after a week of ignoring him. So hard to stand my ground, but if I am always arguing with him and calling him a POS (he's a narcissist anyway), then yes, he is NOT the one and it's probably the loss that makes me still want him since I never really had him. Oh the games we still play sometimes, so annoying.
3 years ... it took 3 years to let go. And once i did he suddenly had time too meet up. Smh
Ignored his ass and he started to text my best friend so he could talk to me. Lol
If he REALLY wanted to talk. He knows where i’m living ☺️
Why men always come back around when you stop caring and suddenly want to put effort ? I know thats not always the case but curious tbh
He wouldn't have met you anyway.
They always put their best effort into you in the beginning. That's how they get you. You're still a chase, but once the chase stops and he has you he gets bored and leaves. He doesn't want you but likes the access to you whether he wants your attention or sex but once you stop caring about him and move on he suddenly wants you back? He doesn't miss you he just misses whatever it is that you did for him. He didn't care before when he had you bc he figured you weren't going anywhere, but now you left so he wants to prove to himself that he can still have you if he tries hard enough. But I promise once you show him that he's got you still he'll disappear again. people want what they can't have
Same thing happened to me
@@Poison_Ivy22 yup had a guy try to come back 2 years ago but I ignored his ass and he got mad and talk shit about me to his ex 😂😂😂
@@shutit4024 a guy did the same thing to me. He led me on and ghosted me. Strung me along for 5 more months before I had enough and moved on and met someone 2 months later then the asshole tried coming back wanting another chance. He tried a few times actually telling me I was the one who got away. He did apologize for how he treated me. I accepted his apology but I told him to move on bc I already did and this was 5 years later lol. He finally got the hint.
Loving all these videos this week. We miss you when you are gone. Back in the original HQ in the car.....i love it!
I've had the talks and gave the ultimatum and his actions basically ripped my heart out and threw it away. He's taking me for granted but I'm not giving any assets🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️
Same I always give him sex but he hasn't taken me on a date to like Applebee's or some restaurant like that and we been together for 4 months.
@@xoxobutterflyHe can’t even be bothered to just come over for sex.
Any guy that gives mixed signals is a flake so move on to the next guy 😌
Thank you, thank you, thank you for this video, explicit words and all because they're needed lol. I truly like what you said about throwing a wrench in the pattern and being willing to change because the other person is clearly not going to. All of this seems to be common sense but can get lost when it's happening to you in the moment, but it's time to wake up and see their actions clearly for what they are. "Throw the wrench, change the pattern, kick that M-F-er to the curb"!
I called him out and gave him the ultimatum and he said “I respect your decision” 🙄 so AKA you’re telling me I’m RIGHT when I called you out for giving me the bare minimum and that I deserve better
Sometimes they do the thing that they start to treat you bad so that you would end things, so they can call it your decision 🙄 very unmasculine
It feels so good listening from the horse's mouth.. so blunt but goes right inside the heart..not just the head.. thanks
This is why God says to WAIT after marriage.... His Will is for Our Protection.
So true.
3:32 but can't a guy still marry u and behave flaky?
You are AWESOME!!!!!!
Thank you so much for your videos.
Whoever she is, the woman who has the blessing of having you as a partner in her life is ONE HAPPY and LUCKY LADY.🥰
My recent ex would send endless texts proclaiming his adoration of me, I was his "everything, he wanted to build and grow with me"
But then, chose guy friends, sports, drinking over me every time.
Over a 2 week period, I couldn't even get a 5 minute phone call or an in-person meeting to properly breakup with him. I was forced to do so via text. It just means he really didn't like me and did not mean what he said
I’ve been flaked on like 7 times in 2 weeks
I threw a wrench in the works once and said 'sort your shit I'm going' and followed through. He didn't change his ways, because (as he said) "now I have nothing to change for" and he just got worse with the partying and running wild... the heck? Elliot I did everything right here
He’s just not your guy. If you leave, and he doesn’t fix his behavior, he just doesn’t give a damn. And you will find as you get older, if you have to leave a guy, it’s most likely he doesn’t care at all. I experienced this with every man I’ve ever dealt with in my 27 years old being married and/or dating, and so has my sister. A man who loves you won’t f*ck it up. He just won’t. Men who need 2nd chances are the men who don’t deserve them. A woman can do everything right and be the most wonderful girl in the world, and none of that matters, because you’re not what he’s looking for. Men who want to party and run wild do it with women who want the same things. Men are very self oriented. He’s not gonna change for you. He’s not gonna do anything he doesn’t absolutely, 100% want to do. He’s not gonna sacrifice anything for you. Men only do those things in the movies. In real life, they are who they are, and who they are at age 20 is pretty much gonna be who they are at age 70. Men don’t change; they just change women hoping to find one who will take him as is with no improvement.
@@toscadonna wow, you're totally right. Thanks for putting it so well also. In my case they don't seem to really love me or care, but will lie and manipulate and pretend they do for me to stick around. Actions always speak louder than words I guess
You dodged a bullet.
@@toscadonna I love your comments, you should have a channel❤️❤️❤️
What's going on everybody else ts your favorite commenter!!!!!
It's good to consider that having integrity (words and actions lining up) have more to do with that person's character and not what the other person is doing. It's quite probable that they may reflect this type of behavior in all areas of their life. In dating, it's good to look at someone for who they are and not take responsibility for their character traits. E.I. selecting the proper partner for you and not trying to change them or yourself to be something desired.
Elliott....Please explain more specifically, what you mean by giving him the chance to miss you. I know you mean to pull away, but for how long 1 month, 2 months, more?? What do we do if during that time he texts or calls? Do we answer?? Please help us for those who "Suck" at being with men.
Yeah you do answer. But you cultivate your own life without him. This includes dating other men. Elliot says when I truly loves you and sees you as his wife etc, he won’t put himself in the position to lose you.
Perfect timing El
I really feel like he doesn't care that much. I feel like he doesn't care if I was to walk away .. he doesn't even console me when I'm sad. He just freezes up anyways. Since the start of our relationship he's been saying he will do this and that but it takes him a year to do it. I knew his actions didn't match up with his words from the start. I just had hope though. And I still hold onto that hope three years later. Nothing much had changed. He keeps giving me time frames for when he will quit vaping, and let's himself down each time. He's not even ready to move out . He's not ready for commitment. He's told me straight to my face actually, and I've been ignoring it this whole time.. he keeps saying he's not ready yet. He's young. He doesn't have enough money or a stable job. I keep telling him we can do it together. He chosen to have freebies at his house and take advantage. Even though we both don't have the best households. He's not ready to take the leap into buying our first apartment and we've been dating for almost 3 years. Known eachother for 7. I don't know how much more of this I can take.. I just feel more like a friend to him than a girlfriend right now.
Are you still with him?
Super helpful! Thnku
Love your work Coach💪🏻🤘🏻
Your so Awesome .I love your advice💕
Can you make a video about dating a man who’s suddenly dealing with grief. All communication has stopped. Your insight would be greatly appreciated. I’ve made it clear that I care but he barely talks to me now
I'm in the same boat , Elliott please
@@j-tenn226 it’s so hard just not knowing where you stand.
Elliot where can we find the "right guy". During the day for example at work or at night in a bar? Is nighttime always bad?
Go where quality men are during the daytime. Health food stores, book stores, etc. Not at night time at bar, club, etc.
@@FM-zg5hz thanks
@@FM-zg5hz They should be at WORK!!
@AliSand How’s the night club party men working out for you? I always see you commenting on several channels so it’s clearly not going well. Good luck.
Loved, "Cut that mother effer off". Get over your ego, so you can cut that, pretend he's not a player off. He'll respect you more, because if he cut you off easily, he's used to playing easy girls anyways, and he knows you'll keep defeating him, because you're not easy, so he'd rather save face like the coward he is, then face a real Women he feels he's not good enough for. He's looking for several girls with very little minds, that will give their body to him. Speaking your mind is intimidating to guys that participate in mindless sex like this, chasing low value Women eventually turns them mindless. Successful Men have 1 good Woman behind them. Concentrate on attracting success, don't make yourself not good enough for successful Men, by playing around with these broke Boys.
Wish I saw this video years ago. ❤
Nope, it's not "emotional?" For us it's like, we've put in and invested, so it's not so easy to pull out of the relationship? It's just like a loved one dying in all sudden accident....you've invested all this time & energy, and now it's gone in a blink of an eye!! It's a shock, basically😒
What if we have the long distance thing!? And then this happens 🤷🏻♀️
Been through that and it won't go anywhere. Set yourself free.
Great video my fellow Pisces ♓🐟
I put forth effort but he puts forth effort but not noticeable efforts. He does it quietly and behind the scenes. I do it outwardly and boldly. Is there a way we can come together?
thank you! just closed the door and professionally ghosted, he can have his bitches back
Lol! Elliot you can be a lil ratchet sometimes & it’s fking hilarious! 🤣🤣
Well I live with him so that last option applies to me
Yes, the reason if he likes someone else.
My crush is a shy guys and would always have good body language around me, and make more jokes when he was near me last school year. We haven’t see each other in person since March (and this year, we don’t have any classes together), and when I text him a meme every couple of days, he just leaves me on read. I just think he’s shy/nervous to text me back. Or does it mean he’s lost interest in me?
I think he's lost interest
DO NOT TEXT HIM IF HE LEAVES YOU ON READ !
@@yeeeeeyy thanks for your help!
But he was better to talk to in person than over text
They don't.
Hi Elliot Good Night's From Singapore! What If A Guy Who Been Ghosted, Quiet,Silent Or Distant Wants To Returns After About One Year The Relationship Fizzles Or Have Broken-Up & What If His Actions Does Not Match With His Words If He Keep Playing Or Flirting With Other Woman's Until He Fed-Up Or He Just Playing Stupid Game's Around Different People's? What Does A Guy Have To Take Serious With A Woman Until He Is Not Going To Changed His Behaviour Or Character's If He Is Not Showing Up?
Look up the little Shannon’s RUclips channel. Research narcissism
Missing our bestie
My boyfriend said he was going to take me on a date but he cancelled last time because his back was hurting and so we hung out yesterday he did buy me tacos at a taco truck and I ended having sex with him like a dumbass :( 😞
I wanted to go to Applebee's I told him 😩 but idk im not going to see him unless he sets a date and time and place. He just doesn't see me worth it. I'm so sad again
First
a lot women automatically get alarmed if a guy missed a day or more from calling or texting I see and here it all the time..then they automatically thinks he's not interested or hes playing games..that's why some ppl relationship fail ppl wanna be around there mate 24/ 7 wanna no his or her every move...FOR WHAT?🤷♀️
Having UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS will cause you Your own EMOTIONAL PAIN AND JOY...dont no man no or woman want no 5stage clinger especially if you dealt with one before it very draining and toxic and you be co - dependent men and women please have your own life that the start to a growing relationship just see or hang out with partner on the weekend..ppl are usually busy during the week anyway...I no this pertain to everyone but just the ones having this issue..
A man who is in love with you calls you every day. Period. Unless he’s deployed into war and has no access to a phone. Men who disappear for days are seeing other women, and the woman should know that and see other men, too.
🤙
But takers...mmmm😃