I’m a single mother and I’m glad I’m not the only one worried about this.. I refuse to let any man come near my children. I’m okay with going on dates once in a while. But my main priority is my kids!
There are men who prey on single mothers. Like Tony said, they can sense your desperation. Ladies, please be careful. Let God and your kids be your #1 focus and you can’t go wrong. Most of these men are waisting your time anyway.
@@customfittedinc I know right! But honestly if not most single mother have a man around that is what I seen all my life. Never seen a single mom totally focused on their kids and no man around.
@@jessicagiles2941 you're absolutely right.. its just not all of us i havent had a sexual partner in 3 years 2 years begore that and i got a 2 year old i only trust me to do the job i dont do the tjings he mentioned thats low budget vibrations and dangerous god is love and takes care of all his children blessings to you mom your doing a great job i lnow it periodttt🥰🥰🥰😍😍
Also, a side note to all my single mother sisters- rejection can also mean protection from the Lord. I used to think there was something wrong with me as men hardly approach me, but now I know it’s God protecting my children and myself. 3 yrs divorced, two wonderful children.
I heard that! I been thinking about that too for a long time. You said the exact same thing I have been thinking about......you definitely couldn’t have said that any better. Jesus is protecting and keeping the strays away! 🙌🏾 Yes 👏🏾👏🏾🙏🏾
Good evening tribe! I'm a single mother. My daughter has cerebral palsy and depends on caregivers for all basic needs. She cannot do anything for herself. She lived with me until she was 13 and I could no longer lift her. She has been in a group home ever since. I'm there daily. I made sure it was a women's only group home. Everyone that works there is female. They all know me and my expectations. I would sit in jail behind any one taking advantage of her. Momma don't play 💯 Stay blessed y'all🤍
Yesss Tony! I was a single mother almost my entire kid’s childhood. Dated but never brought men home. I wish more ladies would realize that a man is not the answer to their problems. On the contrary, the men we have gotten involved with created more problems! Now we’re here!! 🙏🏻🙏🏻
I am single parent of 2 daughters as well. I am not in a hurry to date or meet anyone. Evil is rampant through the Earth. I thoroughly appreciate your message.
Tony is sounding the alarm. “Do NOT Bring Men Around Your Children.” When I Finally started dating 2yrs after my divorce, my teenage daughter was still at home. I had a guy I was dating get mad a me, because I wouldn’t let him come to my house. “I can meet you at Your house, we can meet at the venue,…. But what you’re Not going to do, is come to My house, I have a daughter.” After saying that makes no sense, it’s immature…, he shut up, abided by my rules, and continued to date me. These are perilous times. NO MAN is more important than your children. Praying for single mothers🙏.
I'm a single mother and no man is allowed in the presence of my children. The single life is amazing and my children are my priority. It's never a dull moment of the great times I have with my family.
Yep very true. I didn’t plan my life with the idea of being a single mom but I was in Fornication and now I’m a single parent. Now it’s God and my daughter as my focus. Im Abstinent now. Maybe one day I’ll be married or maybe I won’t but my daughter’s safety and security is most important! And I always pray to God when it comes to a man show me who he is over and over again lol or just those with bad intentions flea because i don’t want to be fooled and I know God will reveal the truth to anyone willing to listen!
Tony this is why at 59yrs old, divorced almost 10yrs, I’ve never had a man around my children. My last two children (have 4, older ones were 25 and 30) were 10 & 12 when I became the main parent in their lives. They have never seen me with another man for the mere fact that they came first. I just didn’t worry about me needing a man. I knew my children needed me and I made sure they had me full focus. Abd I truly enjoyed all the cheerleading competitions, the marching band at football games, golf, tennis and going to PTSA Meetings, being in booster clubs. Watching them grow and become wonderful young adults. They are now 19 j 21. I’m so excited to see them venturing out and doing their own thing(babygirl 21, senior in college, baby boy 19 in tech school). Knowing that they don’t have baggage and scars from me bringing the wrong people around the (male or female) makes my heart sing. So now I’m an empty nester. Son wanted to ck out dads living situation (all good) and I was happy to let him be with him. Daughter has own apartment right by her school with 2 roommates, works and is all good, too. Sorry so long, but I want young women to know that you can be happy and fulfilled without having a man around your children. If I want, do ur thing away from ur house and don’t be so eager to let him know where u live. I’m enjoying my life, doing my thing and don’t feel as if I’ve missed anything. Men will be men and not saying in a negative coni tone, but I’m still enjoying my life without a main man. I’ve kept myself up by not allowing stress to age me and make me bitter. I’m just now ready to go out and do me as far as dating. Be wise, be blessed ladies and Tony as always, thank you for another powerful, inciting, wonderful talk. Blessings to u and ur family❤️🙏🏽
I have raised 3 sons alone! The youngest turned 18 in December. GOD HAS NEVER FAILED OR FORSAKEN US!!! I have failed us plenty but no man has had access to our life in any substantial way. I have mixed feelings about it but I know God has a plan purpose and position for each of us. The closer I stay to him the richer the reward.
@@lyricsoftheart I have, but I know I have somethings to work on personally. I have maintained situationships for company but now my work must be done to be the whole person I want to attract. It's about permanency over perpetracion. Acknowledgement over assimilation. And courage over complacency. It's harder to change than stay the same but it's worth it!
Thanks for this Tony. I'm a single mom and never thought I would be. Single moms handling their business and always putting their kids first are Superwomen.
Superwoman for being a single mother? What happened to our values? Superwoman are those women who are married, have children, manage themselves, their husbands & family very well & thrive in spite of life stresses. I see most single mothers making a mess of their lives & children's lives. Don't mean to offend you but all this superwoman talk just irks me. I'm sick of seeing all of this mess around brought on by single-parent households.
@@hopelove1595 I was everything you said a married mother but I had to divorce my husband and I'm the main caretaker of my children now. Anything can happen in life and you end up raising kids alone. And I meant the women that put their children's well being first before having a new relationship are very strong women.
Unfortunately, all the "superwoman" talk encourages more out-of-wedlock births. It makes young girls, weak & simple-minded women think there's nothing wrong with the behavior & there is. It's not something most do well. Yet, they send messages that women can do it if they are just "strong" cuz that's what it's all about. But it's not true. No one is being very truthful about the hole in one's life & heart not having a husband who's supportive and loving. Most single mothers are depressed, lonely & yes, desperate & we see time & time, again, that the children pay the cost at every turn. Being a single-parent isn't ideal & should never be glamourized. Because our communities are so broken & dysfunctional, praising single mothers isn't something I do. Women who have lost their husbands are different. It wasn't a choice on their part. It was out of their control. All others choose to be single-parents. All this superwoman talk has been very destructive to the point that most black women will never marry. There's no God 🙏 in the behavior or the false praise surrounding those who choose to be single mothers.
@@hopelove1595 she didn’t say it was ideal. Stop judging people and move along… nobody reading all that. Everybody situation is different and You not perfect. You not God. 🙄🙄
@@aprilnicole8096 Why are you responding? Your writing is atrocious. Are you a child? You, obviously, cared enough to respond & you read every single word. Didn't you?. What a phony! Get your life together & make sure you aren't running around pandering & creating more destruction in this world than good. Unfortunately, that's what's happening in most single-parent situations. I'll judge as long as I have standards & as God gives me the ability to do so. You know what having standards means? Right? It allows us to be able to critically think, evaluate circumstances & arrive at a conclusion. All of the chaos & dysfunction in our world isn't happening in a vacuum. There are reasons children & adults are behaving the way they are & single-parenthood is numero uno #1. Again, unless a woman's husband dies or leaves her, she chooses single-parenthood & all that comes with it. That doesn't make her a superwoman....not even close. Ugh! 🙄🙄🙄
After my divorce it was just my son and I. He’s now 21 and doing well. I’m getting my 3 B’s in order and living my life. I’m dating from time to time. But happy being single at this moment. Best wishes to all you wonderful mothers taking care of your family.
Right, women included. People these days intentions are ill and they're sick in the head. Grown women, jealous of little girls, trying to compete with them for their father's attention smh.
I’ve dealt with this first hand. I’ve known this man over 20 years. We started to date. 2 years in. My 12 year old told me he said something inappropriate to her! I thought I could trust this person. So you can never be too careful. This was a wake up call. Needless to say . I’ve not spoken to him sense. I was not going to pick a man over my child. Had to go , point blank Periodd! Tony I will give that $39 with no problem. 🙌🏾
As a single mother of a teenage daughter I was always aware of not bringing men around her. I could never believe If the man wanted me for me or wanted my daughter. That’s the price you pay as a parent. She was always first in my life. I didn’t even think about dating until she was gone and on her own which she is now. That’s the best way for all involved. God is a sustainer if you do things the right way. He will keep you when you need to be kept. We had that conversation. I always told my daughter that I would believe her if anyone messed with her and to please tell me. This is so real Tony. Thanks for this.
Tony...I married a second time. 17 years married, I divorced him because he cheated, but he was a great stepfather to my 2 kids. I don't bad mouth him because my kids have so many good memories of him in their lives.
Having children is not a game and should not be treated as one. Everybody gets discernment coming around mine. As parents we definitely have to be mindful of who we allow around our kids. Not only for us as mothers, having a man, but also their fathers, and the type of women they date and marry. While you can't control who your ex dates it's important to know about that person and how they feel about you and your kids. Everybody gets the side eye from me, men, women, and other children as well. You don't know what other children have going on in their house and what they've been exposed to.
It can be a stepmother or a stepfather that has nefarious intentions with your children. As sad as it sounds, your child that is not of their bloodline is an easy target if the person entering your life is not of sound mind.
People can do wrong to even they own blood smh. My dad is a step dad to my older brother and they have a good relationship so they’re good men out there willing to step parent but they are rare type and good character is even harder to find these days.
I trust NOBODY with my son... My eyes are wide open. The moment he was able to speak, I started educating him about sexuality. No body can be touching him in anyway, kissing him, watching him getting dress, or showering with him, etc. I told him at 3 yr of age, you tell mommy asap if anyone does it. Mommy will cut his or her neck off. Mommy is not scared of a single soul in planet earth. He looked at me and said : " okay mommy, but police will arrest you". I replied, No, I'm helping the police. 😬
@@candace9560 🤣🤣🤣 That's right! I did not want him NOT to tell me because mommy can get arrested. At the end I am helping them. No chasing, no trial, no persecutors. From where I came from we cut off the bad grass from the roots. 🤷🏼♀️ 😬
Good message. I get lonely sometimes, but when I look at my beautiful children, I don't mind postponing the dating scene until 30 years from now when they are good and grown and living their own lives. I have often thought about how I could not live with myself if I brought the wrong person into our lives.
I'm a single mother when I was growing up my two daughters I never until my daughters becomes adults because was thinking about what you are now saying
This is so heartbreaking. Nope not going to be living with a man ever again until my girls are gone. I had a very traumatic experience this really hits home. However I'm still disgusted men talk about their girlfriends or wives daughters like that. Everytime I look at my daughter I think about a man living with us and all I think about is him sexualizing her. I just hate it. My own uncle sexualized me. I just hate that predatory nature.
@@AndreaAlvarez-cf4tp I'm sorry to hear that. My ex fiance was grooming my daughter after being with me for 5 years. She told me finally I left that night and went to the police. I will never be the same again.
I'm so glad he said it because it happened with my stepfather and family. I don't want to have to hurt someone behind mine. I has a man say you must be getting a nice check. I was like what the fuck! And your children like me. I was like ( in my head I will kill you)
I don't chime in often but I have to chime in on this one. My mom raised me not to trust men around children so I will not have a man around my child. When I decide to date it will be outside my home. Like you said Tony, he will have to be a man of God and approved by my brother inlaw who is a pastor and a man of God that I trust. Other than that, good. My baby girl is my heart beat.💓
I sent this to both of my daughters who are in their 20’s and single moms with little girls. I wish you were around when I was their age. Thanks for continuing to share wisdom and knowledge 🙏🏾
I’ve learned from my 2nd relationship (last 2 kids father) (total of 3 children) and was a toxic relationship was not fair for my first child to endure such a thing being that it wasn’t her dad. And I said I have no hopes of dating again. I have had to overcome the regret for dealing with such a toxic individual who wasn’t my first daughters dad. Just a mess. Walking blind honestly. God taught me some things - your kids deserve to see you whole and at peace. And once your kids start telling you to leave that guy alone that’s the ultimate sign / she’s seen me cry and be depressed while so young and it was taking a toll on her from all the foolishness and negativity going on. And then it started weighing on my spirit so much more that this individual was not it. And I regret it still. Even though I have 2 kids from this person - 3yrs in I’m grateful to know we are all free and happy and I’m going to stick with being alone OUR KIDS MATTER. And I’m grateful that I can teach my kids to not walk the way I did. It was a rough ride. So I’m definitely staying alone till their grown and living their lives. If God blesses me with someone in his likeness than Ok if not I’m ok as well. PEACE is everything.
This gave me chills. As a single mother with a teenager daughter this is something I’m very over protective about also terrified of. I don’t want to be single like you said it gets lonely but I also know I’m a mother and my daughter will always be my first priority. It’s hard out here
I’m no longer with my child’s father and this is what makes me sad because I would love to have marriage and another child one day with another man. His father is inconsistent, he’s in a new relationship and he barely sees our baby & I’ve accepted that he will not really be there for our son... but what makes me sad is a how a man can easily move on with another woman but people are always down talking on single mothers (KS) as if we don’t qualify for love. A man with 6 kids can marry a woman quickly but a woman with 6 kids is frowned upon. Smh ! I 100% agree with your message in this video though because you can barely trust the daycares with your child(ren) so I do agree that some people will not be able to love your kids as you do. Not too many Russell Wilson’s and Ciara situation 😩🥴
I agree with everything you said. Don't be sad, be encouraged. I'm speaking to you and me when I say this, continue to pray to God for what you specifically want in your future husband and father for your child and seek the Lord always and he will give you the desires of your heart. If you focus on you, your child, and God. He'll bring somebody to fit right in like a jigsaw puzzle. There's numerous Godly blended families out there 😊
I totally understand and this is how I feel. What about mothers like me who want another child and Im in my 30s. Does that mean our chances to meet a husband in time to have another baby is over? Meanwhile the father moves on easily and has more kids.
@@lakisha499 right ! Honestly, I blame the women. Maybe if we start dating men how they date us, like “oh, you got kids...I only date men with no kids.” But see women view the other woman as bitter or whatever they call it ... but you rarely see a man calling another man bitter. Men tend to stray away from the drama whereas women stay. That’s why you will see a man with 6 kids get married quicker than a woman with 6 kids because there is a woman out there that will marry him and all his baggage.
Everything he is saying is FACTS, and needed especially in today's world. Thank you for allowing God to speak through you. I needed to hear this cause I was just talking about this same thing .
So true. Sad story for me, my own biological father betrayed me and my daughter. I tried to build a relationship with him as an adult and he totally took advantage of her. ...Im having a hard time trusting men after that
Thank you so much for being respectfully inclusive to all ways a Child of God can be brought into our world, both voluntarily and involuntarily. Every Life Matters💙
If you’re bringing men/women around your children, You’re desperate. If you can’t date and remove any access from your kids, you don’t need to be dating. I’m honestly so sick of these stories, it is absolutely pathetic and disturbing
This is the truth TG! Lived experience, you want ding a ling-keep it outside the house and away from your children until your children grown. That’s the safest way, and don’t ever let a man live with your kids without doing a criminal records check, even then you’re taking a risk. From personal experience, that risk ain’t worth it. Get that ding a ling-outside the house and away from your kids.
I was a victim of child abuse ,I am almost 50 years now an I am still struggling I never got help for it I just go through life guessing my way doing the best can , but some times it's not enough,my stepdad was the one who sexually abuse me he passed away ten years ago, it's time for me to get over it and move on but I really don't know how
But real talk I have 3 boys and 1 girl and I protect them heavy. I was 5 and was fondled with. But by my Great-grandmothers foster child. I never told anyone. Until I was an adult. I dislike Hide and Seek to this day. Its sad when you remember yourself at 5 knowing how to french kiss and knowing what a child's privates were. Which led to other dark experiences growing up. God bless the healing and the process.
Tony keep trying to tell yall! I pray to God that yall listening. I don’t have any children but my heart aches to hear about children getting hurt. A friend was just telling me today, that theres a couple lives next door to her. And all day she hears them beating in the little 8yr old boy. And the man that beats him is not even his father. Smh this happens For-real. So sad. Keep speaking Tony
Great advice, it's always better to be safe than sorry, especially with your children, don't take any type of chances when it comes to serious things !
Thaaaank you, Tony.. some men are like hawks. Just waiting for prey. The home should be respected just like what's in between the legs. Keep that door closed and not so qwik to give away the key. I feel you, Tony. Nowadays, you can't even smile at anyone because right away they think you're flirting. ..good thing for masks, in this case.. LOLOL!
You're absolutely right I've just come out of a 2-month relationship with a guy I almost lost my mind with stress anxiety and I spent so much time crying he was very manipulative and he just had an agenda to try and use me it was a very stressful time everybody appreciate being single at least when you're alone you have a certain level of peace and no one manipulating or trying to use you
Thank you. I was in a dark place about dating. This gave me an eye opener to dating. Like you say Big Brother Tony, a rejection is a blessing. Thanks bro.
This is so true , I cant have just any man around my kids one is grown other 2 are under 18 yrs of age. Really a praying time 🙏. We just have to be still and wait on the Lord.
Tony this needs to be posted everywhere! I saw a post that asked if ppl would date someone with a 1 yr old. The men said absolutely not. The women got upset and said why shouldn't a woman with a child that young be dating. These women just don't get it
Please listen to this 💯 truth. Tony your videos for single moms have been a life changer. I experienced the man that would be super rude and “thump” my little boy. Never again. My focus is now, God, my child and purpose. Dating can wait! 🙏🏽
I never understood how women could bring different man around the kid’s especially their daughters. My baby will be 18 and I’m still cautious about who I bring around her.
Amen. My home is my children's safe place. My children see mama don't play and they are older. I have dated some1 for years and brother has never been to my house. I can speak to experience of protecting my children from a child. Mama don't play. I will step in front of Satan himself to protect my children. I am so grateful that God has given me a head on my shoulders to allow me to have a decent career and a decent ex-husband so we can provide a safe place for our children. There are woman who are living with men who they are dependent upon( who are not related to the child) to help make ends meat. I never judge ....but this is real. They are not wanting a man for the D....but they feel they need a man to keep a roof over their heads. I pray that God continues to lift every single mother up in this group, giving us wisdom and guidance to protect our children from the enemy.
Tony thank u SO SO much for making this video, there are so many women that need to reminded of this. This is the MOST IMPORTANT video you’ve made 👏👏 Ladies it’s ur job to protect ur babies 1st and foremost!! There are so many sickos out there
I appreciate my Mom so much! She had this mentality and passed it down to me. Im so focused on achieving my goals I dont have time to be worried about a man. I was dating a man on and off for the past few years and finally let him go last year. He keeps coming back trying to weasel his way into my life but I'm too busy moving FORWARD to what God has for me. I realized all the time and energy I spent making him better, I can be using that energy on myself...So over the pandemic, instead of being glued to my phone, gossip and social media...I took the time to learn about trading, and it's literally changed my life. Also, I'm the one who asked for the tour of the sprinter! Lol, I really want to get one for myself and my son (12) for when I do make it big! Which will be very soon, God willing!
When God blesses you Mr. Gaskins jus give Him the Glory and enjoy all your benefits. You've worked hard and have earned them it doesn't matter how much people will hate. That's a lovely sprinter right there and you're inspired a whole generation that they too can make it especially in God. You're really preaching it Sir. Some of us were raised by single mothers who didn't know any better and have experienced exactly what you're talking about which is why i made a vow that I will not put a man above my child because of what I had to endure as a child with a mother who was more concerned about their love life than raising a child on their own. It was a painful experience and I still get triggers. Sometimes, she triggers me on purpose and denies it all ten acts like I've been a rebellious person blah blah blah. It never ends, always pushing the blame but God sees and I pray that 1 day it will all be well with my soul and I can receive God's favour, grace and complete deliverance from it all and God to shine His light upon me, my children, my children's children and to one day have a blessed family and leave a blessed and great legacy.
Very sad, I just watched a court case about a woman who met a man online and let him live with her after a few weeks of knowing him. One night he snuck out of their bed and raped her 10 Month old daughter. Thank G-d he was convicted, but the baby died shortly after the attack:/ You never really know somebody, especially early on...
Single mom, abstinent for 4 years... I am fully focused on me and mine....and I am happily single.
Wirh that attitude you won't stay single for long.
This is exactly how I’m living these days as a single mom. Goals, Growth and Happiness!
Same here. Much respect ✊🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Same here sis 🙏🏽🙌🏽
Ditto!
I’m a single mother and I’m glad I’m not the only one worried about this.. I refuse to let any man come near my children. I’m okay with going on dates once in a while. But my main priority is my kids!
That's very rare. God bless you and your children 🙌🏾
@@PeaceBeStill- God bless you too !💕🙏🏾
@@Nikolebeauty09 you're absolutely right! I make sure to try my best to lead by example.
🙌🏽🙏🏽🙌🏽🤗
Amen🥰
There are men who prey on single mothers. Like Tony said, they can sense your desperation. Ladies, please be careful. Let God and your kids be your #1 focus and you can’t go wrong. Most of these men are waisting your time anyway.
So true
I have 3 kids and I DON'T date I have zero men around them, I don't even talk to a man on the phone. It's not time for man. I am 100% focused on them.
You shouldnt even have to aay that heart to heart many of us are like that i havent had one and someones always trying to be my man ya know💗💕💓💓
@@customfittedinc I know right! But honestly if not most single mother have a man around that is what I seen all my life. Never seen a single mom totally focused on their kids and no man around.
@@jessicagiles2941 you're absolutely right.. its just not all of us i havent had a sexual partner in 3 years 2 years begore that and i got a 2 year old i only trust me to do the job i dont do the tjings he mentioned thats low budget vibrations and dangerous god is love and takes care of all his children blessings to you mom your doing a great job i lnow it periodttt🥰🥰🥰😍😍
Also, a side note to all my single mother sisters- rejection can also mean protection from the Lord. I used to think there was something wrong with me as men hardly approach me, but now I know it’s God protecting my children and myself. 3 yrs divorced, two wonderful children.
I heard that! I been thinking about that too for a long time. You said the exact same thing I have been thinking about......you definitely couldn’t have said that any better. Jesus is protecting and keeping the strays away! 🙌🏾 Yes 👏🏾👏🏾🙏🏾
✔️💯THAT PART
Yes, absolutely!! 💯
Amen, this is so true.
Amen 💯
Be mindful of your mates..male or female bc they will Neverrr love your child like you do.
Good evening tribe!
I'm a single mother. My daughter has cerebral palsy and depends on caregivers for all basic needs. She cannot do anything for herself.
She lived with me until she was 13 and I could no longer lift her.
She has been in a group home ever since. I'm there daily. I made sure it was a women's only group home. Everyone that works there is female.
They all know me and my expectations.
I would sit in jail behind any one taking advantage of her.
Momma don't play 💯
Stay blessed y'all🤍
❤ Sorry to hear of this. My prayers of comfort go out to you my sister. We can not judge what we have not been through. Be strong ❤
Prayers and blessings to you both ♥️
God bless you sis. He is with you and your daughter all along the way. Stay strong in Him🙏😘
Where is her father? Why is he not helping?
@Fires And Flowers omg
Yesss Tony! I was a single mother almost my entire kid’s childhood. Dated but never brought men home. I wish more ladies would realize that a man is not the answer to their problems. On the contrary, the men we have gotten involved with created more problems! Now we’re here!! 🙏🏻🙏🏻
Yes....🙌🏾
I am single parent of 2 daughters as well. I am not in a hurry to date or meet anyone. Evil is rampant through the Earth. I thoroughly appreciate your message.
Exactly!
I hope every single mother on RUclips hears this. It cannot be stressed enough!
Why every single mom ..isnt dumb thirsty and retardid
I'm a mother of three, and this just proves my theory on why I don't believe in cohabitation until my kids are grown and out of the home.
TRUTH ✔️
100%
True
Tony is sounding the alarm. “Do NOT Bring Men Around Your Children.” When I Finally started dating 2yrs after my divorce, my teenage daughter was still at home. I had a guy I was dating get mad a me, because I wouldn’t let him come to my house. “I can meet you at Your house, we can meet at the venue,…. But what you’re Not going to do, is come to My house, I have a daughter.”
After saying that makes no sense, it’s immature…, he shut up, abided by my rules, and continued to date me. These are perilous times. NO MAN is more important than your children. Praying for single mothers🙏.
Thats a brilliant boundary. No entry.
I'm a single mother and no man is allowed in the presence of my children. The single life is amazing and my children are my priority. It's never a dull moment of the great times I have with my family.
Just when I started craving a man thank you Tony for ringing this bell in my ears my daughters mental health and well being is more important
Craving lol wow
Yep very true. I didn’t plan my life with the idea of being a single mom but I was in Fornication and now I’m a single parent. Now it’s God and my daughter as my focus. Im Abstinent now. Maybe one day I’ll be married or maybe I won’t but my daughter’s safety and security is most important! And I always pray to God when it comes to a man show me who he is over and over again lol or just those with bad intentions flea because i don’t want to be fooled and I know God will reveal the truth to anyone willing to listen!
Tony this is why at 59yrs old, divorced almost 10yrs, I’ve never had a man around my children. My last two children (have 4, older ones were 25 and 30) were 10 & 12 when I became the main parent in their lives. They have never seen me with another man for the mere fact that they came first. I just didn’t worry about me needing a man. I knew my children needed me and I made sure they had me full focus. Abd I truly enjoyed all the cheerleading competitions, the marching band at football games, golf, tennis and going to PTSA Meetings, being in booster clubs. Watching them grow and become wonderful young adults. They are now 19 j 21. I’m so excited to see them venturing out and doing their own thing(babygirl 21, senior in college, baby boy 19 in tech school). Knowing that they don’t have baggage and scars from me bringing the wrong people around the (male or female) makes my heart sing. So now I’m an empty nester. Son wanted to ck out dads living situation (all good) and I was happy to let him be with him. Daughter has own apartment right by her school with 2 roommates, works and is all good, too. Sorry so long, but I want young women to know that you can be happy and fulfilled without having a man around your children. If I want, do ur thing away from ur house and don’t be so eager to let him know where u live. I’m enjoying my life, doing my thing and don’t feel as if I’ve missed anything. Men will be men and not saying in a negative coni tone, but I’m still enjoying my life without a main man. I’ve kept myself up by not allowing stress to age me and make me bitter. I’m just now ready to go out and do me as far as dating. Be wise, be blessed ladies and Tony as always, thank you for another powerful, inciting, wonderful talk. Blessings to u and ur family❤️🙏🏽
Amen sis and now it's your time. Stay blessed 💜
Coach Krystle & single mom of 7 ready for this wisdom.
Preach 🙏🏽I’m so protective with my children. They are with me 24/7. You just don’t know these days children are more and more the victims these days.
The biological parents are doing things to children as well. This world is evil.
I have raised 3 sons alone! The youngest turned 18 in December. GOD HAS NEVER FAILED OR FORSAKEN US!!! I have failed us plenty but no man has had access to our life in any substantial way. I have mixed feelings about it but I know God has a plan purpose and position for each of us. The closer I stay to him the richer the reward.
Since the youngest has turned 18 have you thought about finding someone?
@@lyricsoftheart I have, but I know I have somethings to work on personally. I have maintained situationships for company but now my work must be done to be the whole person I want to attract. It's about permanency over perpetracion. Acknowledgement over assimilation. And courage over complacency. It's harder to change than stay the same but it's worth it!
😊❤️🙏🏾
My boy super country! My dawg said ENDS MEAT! 😂😂
🤣
Tony needs his own dictionary 💯 😂
As a retired teacher and school counselor, I have seen it too many times to count.
Thanks for this Tony. I'm a single mom and never thought I would be. Single moms handling their business and always putting their kids first are Superwomen.
Superwoman for being a single mother? What happened to our values? Superwoman are those women who are married, have children, manage themselves, their husbands & family very well & thrive in spite of life stresses. I see most single mothers making a mess of their lives & children's lives. Don't mean to offend you but all this superwoman talk just irks me. I'm sick of seeing all of this mess around brought on by single-parent households.
@@hopelove1595 I was everything you said a married mother but I had to divorce my husband and I'm the main caretaker of my children now. Anything can happen in life and you end up raising kids alone. And I meant the women that put their children's well being first before having a new relationship are very strong women.
Unfortunately, all the "superwoman" talk encourages more out-of-wedlock births. It makes young girls, weak & simple-minded women think there's nothing wrong with the behavior & there is. It's not something most do well. Yet, they send messages that women can do it if they are just "strong" cuz that's what it's all about. But it's not true.
No one is being very truthful about the hole in one's life & heart not having a husband who's supportive and loving. Most single mothers are depressed, lonely & yes, desperate & we see time & time, again, that the children pay the cost at every turn.
Being a single-parent isn't ideal & should never be glamourized. Because our communities are so broken & dysfunctional, praising single mothers isn't something I do. Women who have lost their husbands are different. It wasn't a choice on their part. It was out of their control. All others choose to be single-parents. All this superwoman talk has been very destructive to the point that most black women will never marry. There's no God 🙏 in the behavior or the false praise surrounding those who choose to be single mothers.
@@hopelove1595 she didn’t say it was ideal. Stop judging people and move along… nobody reading all that. Everybody situation is different and You not perfect. You not God. 🙄🙄
@@aprilnicole8096 Why are you responding? Your writing is atrocious. Are you a child? You, obviously, cared enough to respond & you read every single word. Didn't you?. What a phony! Get your life together & make sure you aren't running around pandering & creating more destruction in this world than good.
Unfortunately, that's what's happening in most single-parent situations. I'll judge as long as I have standards & as God gives me the ability to do so. You know what having standards means? Right? It allows us to be able to critically think, evaluate circumstances & arrive at a conclusion. All of the chaos & dysfunction in our world isn't happening in a vacuum. There are reasons children & adults are behaving the way they are & single-parenthood is numero uno #1. Again, unless a woman's husband dies or leaves her, she chooses single-parenthood & all that comes with it. That doesn't make her a superwoman....not even close. Ugh! 🙄🙄🙄
After my divorce it was just my son and I. He’s now 21 and doing well. I’m getting my 3 B’s in order and living my life. I’m dating from time to time. But happy being single at this moment. Best wishes to all you wonderful mothers taking care of your family.
SO TRUE;I TELL MY DAUGHTER AND NIECE THIS ALL THE TIME. YOU CAN'T HAVE ANY AND EVERYONE AROUND YOUR KIDS
Right, women included. People these days intentions are ill and they're sick in the head. Grown women, jealous of little girls, trying to compete with them for their father's attention smh.
Be cautious about having men around your son's too! Also be careful with who you have your grandkids too! You can't trust anyone 🙅🏾♀️
I’ve dealt with this first hand. I’ve known this man over 20 years. We started to date. 2 years in. My 12 year old told me he said something inappropriate to her! I thought I could trust this person. So you can never be too careful. This was a wake up call. Needless to say . I’ve not spoken to him sense. I was not going to pick a man over my child. Had to go , point blank Periodd! Tony I will give that $39 with no problem. 🙌🏾
As a single mother of a teenage daughter I was always aware of not bringing men around her. I could never believe If the man wanted me for me or wanted my daughter. That’s the price you pay as a parent. She was always first in my life. I didn’t even think about dating until she was gone and on her own which she is now. That’s the best way for all involved. God is a sustainer if you do things the right way. He will keep you when you need to be kept. We had that conversation. I always told my daughter that I would believe her if anyone messed with her and to please tell me. This is so real Tony. Thanks for this.
“How you eat five pieces of pizza!?” 🤣🤣🤣❤️
Needs to be a father-son clip for a Dominos Pizza commercial🤔🤷🏾♀️🙏🏾 & in the right hands of the right marketer, it very well could be..."5 Slices"
It’s veryyyy common. And men have told me their babysitters have done the unthinkable ages 5-8.
A few men told me the same thing!! I can’t imagine a grown woman wanting a baby literally ugh
I have to share this. I know at least a half a dozen women that need to hear this message.
Tony...I married a second time. 17 years married, I divorced him because he cheated, but he was a great stepfather to my 2 kids. I don't bad mouth him because my kids have so many good memories of him in their lives.
FINALLY 👏🏾 Someone of a POSITIVE INFLUENCE Says this‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
You are A True Blessing TG~
What a privilege it is to share in authentic integrity in action!
God bless the Gaskins. ✝️
Having children is not a game and should not be treated as one. Everybody gets discernment coming around mine. As parents we definitely have to be mindful of who we allow around our kids. Not only for us as mothers, having a man, but also their fathers, and the type of women they date and marry. While you can't control who your ex dates it's important to know about that person and how they feel about you and your kids. Everybody gets the side eye from me, men, women, and other children as well. You don't know what other children have going on in their house and what they've been exposed to.
I don’t even trust men around me let alone around my sons !!! My sons have never seen me with a man.! I don’t bring my play home
I don't trust men around me either too much manipulative men, users . Etc ... it always ends in tears
I feel the exact same way.
It can be a stepmother or a stepfather that has nefarious intentions with your children. As sad as it sounds, your child that is not of their bloodline is an easy target if the person entering your life is not of sound mind.
People can do wrong to even they own blood smh. My dad is a step dad to my older brother and they have a good relationship so they’re good men out there willing to step parent but they are rare type and good character is even harder to find these days.
I trust NOBODY with my son... My eyes are wide open. The moment he was able to speak, I started educating him about sexuality. No body can be touching him in anyway, kissing him, watching him getting dress, or showering with him, etc. I told him at 3 yr of age, you tell mommy asap if anyone does it. Mommy will cut his or her neck off. Mommy is not scared of a single soul in planet earth. He looked at me and said : " okay mommy, but police will arrest you". I replied, No, I'm helping the police. 😬
@@WanyReyes helping the police🤣
@@candace9560 🤣🤣🤣 That's right! I did not want him NOT to tell me because mommy can get arrested. At the end I am helping them. No chasing, no trial, no persecutors. From where I came from we cut off the bad grass from the roots. 🤷🏼♀️ 😬
Good message. I get lonely sometimes, but when I look at my beautiful children, I don't mind postponing the dating scene until 30 years from now when they are good and grown and living their own lives. I have often thought about how I could not live with myself if I brought the wrong person into our lives.
I'm a single mother when I was growing up my two daughters I never until my daughters becomes adults because was thinking about what you are now saying
This is so heartbreaking. Nope not going to be living with a man ever again until my girls are gone. I had a very traumatic experience this really hits home. However I'm still disgusted men talk about their girlfriends or wives daughters like that. Everytime I look at my daughter I think about a man living with us and all I think about is him sexualizing her. I just hate it. My own uncle sexualized me. I just hate that predatory nature.
I hate the predatory nature of most men too, of course as a woman it’s just something I don’t understand, don’t want to
My stepdad was the one that sexually assault me for years and my mom never believe me ,I have 5 daughters and I remain single,to avoid murdering a man
@@AndreaAlvarez-cf4tp I'm sorry to hear that. My ex fiance was grooming my daughter after being with me for 5 years. She told me finally I left that night and went to the police. I will never be the same again.
I'm so glad he said it because it happened with my stepfather and family. I don't want to have to hurt someone behind mine. I has a man say you must be getting a nice check. I was like what the fuck! And your children like me. I was like ( in my head I will kill you)
5 pieces of pizza 🍕 😂😂 I’d love a tour but I hear you.
Thank you so much for this video! I’m a newly single mom with a 4 month old.
Me too! Mine’s is 2 months old.
I've vowed to be man free till my kids leave the nest
I don't chime in often but I have to chime in on this one. My mom raised me not to trust men around children so I will not have a man around my child. When I decide to date it will be outside my home. Like you said Tony, he will have to be a man of God and approved by my brother inlaw who is a pastor and a man of God that I trust. Other than that, good. My baby girl is my heart beat.💓
I sent this to both of my daughters who are in their 20’s and single moms with little girls. I wish you were around when I was their age. Thanks for continuing to share wisdom and knowledge 🙏🏾
I’ve learned from my 2nd relationship (last 2 kids father) (total of 3 children) and was a toxic relationship was not fair for my first child to endure such a thing being that it wasn’t her dad. And I said I have no hopes of dating again.
I have had to overcome the regret for dealing with such a toxic individual who wasn’t my first daughters dad. Just a mess. Walking blind honestly.
God taught me some things - your kids deserve to see you whole and at peace.
And once your kids start telling you to leave that guy alone that’s the ultimate sign / she’s seen me cry and be depressed while so young and it was taking a toll on her from all the foolishness and negativity going on. And then it started weighing on my spirit so much more that this individual was not it. And I regret it still.
Even though I have 2 kids from this person - 3yrs in I’m grateful to know we are all free and happy and I’m going to stick with being alone OUR KIDS MATTER.
And I’m grateful that I can teach my kids to not walk the way I did. It was a rough ride. So I’m definitely staying alone till their grown and living their lives.
If God blesses me with someone in his likeness than Ok if not I’m ok as well. PEACE is everything.
This gave me chills. As a single mother with a teenager daughter this is something I’m very over protective about also terrified of. I don’t want to be single like you said it gets lonely but I also know I’m a mother and my daughter will always be my first priority. It’s hard out here
I’m no longer with my child’s father and this is what makes me sad because I would love to have marriage and another child one day with another man. His father is inconsistent, he’s in a new relationship and he barely sees our baby & I’ve accepted that he will not really be there for our son... but what makes me sad is a how a man can easily move on with another woman but people are always down talking on single mothers (KS) as if we don’t qualify for love. A man with 6 kids can marry a woman quickly but a woman with 6 kids is frowned upon. Smh !
I 100% agree with your message in this video though because you can barely trust the daycares with your child(ren) so I do agree that some people will not be able to love your kids as you do. Not too many Russell Wilson’s and Ciara situation 😩🥴
I agree with everything you said. Don't be sad, be encouraged. I'm speaking to you and me when I say this, continue to pray to God for what you specifically want in your future husband and father for your child and seek the Lord always and he will give you the desires of your heart. If you focus on you, your child, and God. He'll bring somebody to fit right in like a jigsaw puzzle. There's numerous Godly blended families out there 😊
I totally understand and this is how I feel. What about mothers like me who want another child and Im in my 30s. Does that mean our chances to meet a husband in time to have another baby is over? Meanwhile the father moves on easily and has more kids.
@@nataliet.3023 thank you 😊
@@lakisha499 right ! Honestly, I blame the women. Maybe if we start dating men how they date us, like “oh, you got kids...I only date men with no kids.” But see women view the other woman as bitter or whatever they call it ... but you rarely see a man calling another man bitter. Men tend to stray away from the drama whereas women stay. That’s why you will see a man with 6 kids get married quicker than a woman with 6 kids because there is a woman out there that will marry him and all his baggage.
Everything he is saying is FACTS, and needed especially in today's world. Thank you for allowing God to speak through you. I needed to hear this cause I was just talking about this same thing .
So true. Sad story for me, my own biological father betrayed me and my daughter. I tried to build a relationship with him as an adult and he totally took advantage of her. ...Im having a hard time trusting men after that
Tony Gaskins has sounded the alarm! Nothing but the truth spoken! I heard him loud and clear! Blessing to you and the Queen🙏🏾
Single mom 🙋🏽♀️ dropping in for Tony’s gems of wisdom!!
Thank you so much for being respectfully inclusive to all ways a Child of God can be brought into our world, both voluntarily and involuntarily. Every Life Matters💙
If you’re bringing men/women around your children, You’re desperate. If you can’t date and remove any access from your kids, you don’t need to be dating. I’m honestly so sick of these stories, it is absolutely pathetic and disturbing
Your right Fancy !
I think it's best to only date when the kids are at school or somewhere else
I just said this yesterday with a coworker. It real out in the streets.
This is the truth TG! Lived experience, you want ding a ling-keep it outside the house and away from your children until your children grown. That’s the safest way, and don’t ever let a man live with your kids without doing a criminal records check, even then you’re taking a risk. From personal experience, that risk ain’t worth it. Get that ding a ling-outside the house and away from your kids.
That pizza conversation reminded me of my son and I lol 💜
i dont have kids i'm just here to support 😄
I was a victim of child abuse ,I am almost 50 years now an I am still struggling I never got help for it I just go through life guessing my way doing the best can , but some times it's not enough,my stepdad was the one who sexually abuse me he passed away ten years ago, it's time for me to get over it and move on but I really don't know how
Please get therapy! Please HEAL
Sister, you can’t do it alone. You need counseling, with a trained professional. Praying for you🙏💕.
@@alwaysaccurate8725 there is no therapy available here in this country, I live in Belize Central America
@@AndreaAlvarez-cf4tp try online therapy
Great word coach. Lil man is so cute he worked hard today....he's a growing boy get ready for the athlete appetite. Stay blessed.😊
But real talk I have 3 boys and 1 girl and I protect them heavy. I was 5 and was fondled with. But by my Great-grandmothers foster child. I never told anyone. Until I was an adult. I dislike Hide and Seek to this day. Its sad when you remember yourself at 5 knowing how to french kiss and knowing what a child's privates were. Which led to other dark experiences growing up. God bless the healing and the process.
Wonderful message! 💙
Now im in the mood for five slices of 🍕!
Thanks for reminding me I’m on the right track!
Thank u tony now this some REAL SPILL💯
Be blessed💜💙
Bro Tony that's so precious of your son saying he ate 5 pizza , trust me my grandkids can eat the same amount also. 🤗
Tony keep trying to tell yall! I pray to God that yall listening. I don’t have any children but my heart aches to hear about children getting hurt. A friend was just telling me today, that theres a couple lives next door to her. And all day she hears them beating in the little 8yr old boy. And the man that beats him is not even his father. Smh this happens For-real. So sad. Keep speaking Tony
Great advice, it's always better to be safe than sorry, especially with your children, don't take any type of chances when it comes to serious things !
Thaaaank you, Tony.. some men are like hawks. Just waiting for prey. The home should be respected just like what's in between the legs. Keep that door closed and not so qwik to give away the key. I feel you, Tony. Nowadays, you can't even smile at anyone because right away they think you're flirting. ..good thing for masks, in this case.. LOLOL!
Child please lord being single is so much less stressful
You're absolutely right I've just come out of a 2-month relationship with a guy I almost lost my mind with stress anxiety and I spent so much time crying he was very manipulative and he just had an agenda to try and use me it was a very stressful time everybody appreciate being single at least when you're alone you have a certain level of peace and no one manipulating or trying to use you
Fo so !!!!!! Girl worry about u and your kids and your money shit that's enough
This one's for me. Thank you TG.
Thank you. I was in a dark place about dating. This gave me an eye opener to dating. Like you say Big Brother Tony, a rejection is a blessing. Thanks bro.
Me too I just came out of a very short term relationship which was very hurtful best just to stay away from these men
I was today years old when I found out it was 'ends meet' and not 'ends meat'
😳🤦🏾♀️ Thanks Tony!
This is so true , I cant have just any man around my kids one is grown other 2 are under 18 yrs of age. Really a praying time 🙏. We just have to be still and wait on the Lord.
Preach Tony! I know so many single moms/women who seek validation through men. Its so much more to life than that.
Gratitude 🙏🏽 Tony PREACH!!!
When Tony go “🗣🗣🗣Listen to what I am telling you” ! I know It’s serious business !
Great advice...such a sad reality for so many.
Tony this needs to be posted everywhere! I saw a post that asked if ppl would date someone with a 1 yr old. The men said absolutely not. The women got upset and said why shouldn't a woman with a child that young be dating. These women just don't get it
This is a whole word that needs to be shared! You are 🎯
Cant wait $39. A month.
Them babies love that Dominoes Pizza !!!
I swear those eczema creams will get you every time . I had to move mine from around the toothpaste 😂
Amen 🙏 sum folks ain’t ready!!! May God continue to Bless you and your family🙏
Stay Bless Tony. Thank you for all you do. God Bless you!!!
“How could I be so naive? Because you were thinking with what’s between yo legs.” TG
Good word! You are speaking truth. Thank you.
That’s right. Bad enough your owe family can do something. YOU BETTER BE PAYING ATTENTION TO THESE MEN YOU HAVE AROUND YOUR DAUGHTERS......
You have the Sprinter looking very nice inside (custom?), so I can imagine the outside is equally exceptional
Please listen to this 💯 truth. Tony your videos for single moms have been a life changer. I experienced the man that would be super rude and “thump” my little boy. Never again. My focus is now, God, my child and purpose. Dating can wait! 🙏🏽
I never understood how women could bring different man around the kid’s especially their daughters. My baby will be 18 and I’m still cautious about who I bring around her.
I haven’t watched in a while but I’m here for this as it relates !! 🥰
Amen. My home is my children's safe place. My children see mama don't play and they are older. I have dated some1 for years and brother has never been to my house. I can speak to experience of protecting my children from a child. Mama don't play. I will step in front of Satan himself to protect my children. I am so grateful that God has given me a head on my shoulders to allow me to have a decent career and a decent ex-husband so we can provide a safe place for our children. There are woman who are living with men who they are dependent upon( who are not related to the child) to help make ends meat. I never judge ....but this is real. They are not wanting a man for the D....but they feel they need a man to keep a roof over their heads. I pray that God continues to lift every single mother up in this group, giving us wisdom and guidance to protect our children from the enemy.
Tony thank u SO SO much for making this video, there are so many women that need to reminded of this. This is the MOST IMPORTANT video you’ve made 👏👏
Ladies it’s ur job to protect ur babies 1st and foremost!! There are so many sickos out there
I’ve seen men describe single mothers as “temporary moisture”. Ladies, stay off your back
Whoa!
I’m sorry can you clarify?
@@lyricsoftheart basically just some wet a*s excuse the language
@@lyricsoftheart a receptacle for a sexual release. Not a human and definitely not for anything meaningful
Those men are some a..holes.😈
I appreciate my Mom so much! She had this mentality and passed it down to me. Im so focused on achieving my goals I dont have time to be worried about a man. I was dating a man on and off for the past few years and finally let him go last year. He keeps coming back trying to weasel his way into my life but I'm too busy moving FORWARD to what God has for me. I realized all the time and energy I spent making him better, I can be using that energy on myself...So over the pandemic, instead of being glued to my phone, gossip and social media...I took the time to learn about trading, and it's literally changed my life.
Also, I'm the one who asked for the tour of the sprinter! Lol, I really want to get one for myself and my son (12) for when I do make it big! Which will be very soon, God willing!
Thank You for this honest message 🌺
When God blesses you Mr. Gaskins jus give Him the Glory and enjoy all your benefits. You've worked hard and have earned them it doesn't matter how much people will hate. That's a lovely sprinter right there and you're inspired a whole generation that they too can make it especially in God. You're really preaching it Sir. Some of us were raised by single mothers who didn't know any better and have experienced exactly what you're talking about which is why i made a vow that I will not put a man above my child because of what I had to endure as a child with a mother who was more concerned about their love life than raising a child on their own. It was a painful experience and I still get triggers. Sometimes, she triggers me on purpose and denies it all ten acts like I've been a rebellious person blah blah blah. It never ends, always pushing the blame but God sees and I pray that 1 day it will all be well with my soul and I can receive God's favour, grace and complete deliverance from it all and God to shine His light upon me, my children, my children's children and to one day have a blessed family and leave a blessed and great legacy.
Very sad, I just watched a court case about a woman who met a man online and let him live with her after a few weeks of knowing him. One night he snuck out of their bed and raped her 10 Month old daughter. Thank G-d he was convicted, but the baby died shortly after the attack:/ You never really know somebody, especially early on...
You are right on time with this one Tony.
Thank you so much for addressing this. There is nothing worse than harming a child.
Tony, I'm so happy to see your blessings coming to fruition. I wish you many more!!