Apple is a Company, Not a Religion | Don McMillan Comedy
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 13 сен 2024
- Apple people! Calm down!!
🌐Social Media🌐
📶Facebook: / donmcmillan
📶Twitter: / donmcmillan
🤓Don’s Bio🤓
America's #1 Nerdy Comedian
What do you get when you cross an Engineer with a stand-up comedian? You get Don McMillan. This former chip designer has been doing his one-of-a-kind, PowerPoint-Driven comedy show for audiences for over 20 years. In his show packed with graphs & charts, Don will show you the funny side of your world that has been sitting right in front of you - you are just too busy working to notice. Don graduated from Stanford University with a Master’s Degree in Electrical Engineering. He then went to work at AT&T Bell Labs where he was part of the team that designed the world’s first 32-bit microprocessor. He then moved to Silicon Valley where he helped launch the start-up company, VLSI Technology. Then after 15 years in the tech world, Don quit his job to become a stand-up comedian. That year he won $100,000 as the Comedy Grand Champion on “Star Search”. Don’s been seen on “The Tonight Show”, “HBO”, and the “Comedy Central”. These days, Don spends most of his time writing and performing customized corporate comedy shows for companies like Google, Apple, Amazon, Microsoft, Ford Motors, and Exxon/Mobil. Don has performed more than 800 corporate shows in the last 20 years and he was named the #1 Corporate Comedian by the CBS Business Network.
#donmcmillan #standupcomedy #comedy #standup #engineering #nerd
he's great. one of my favorite jokes of his is.. 44% of marriages end in divorce.. that means 56% of marriages end in ... Death.
Without which the TV show 20/20 would have no source material.
I think this was originally a George Carlin joke but don’t quote me on that
Some marriage end in MIA though.
@@realGBx64I think there is a lot of recycling going on. Just shows who were their influences. Most don’t steal them on purpose, probably just heard them and it’s in the back of their head.
"Laptop dance" that was gold.
😂
no, golden is the audience
The only comedian working in Kelvin.
And metric!!
And that the Kelvin timeline?
The jokes per minute is off the charts. We need a slide in the presentation.
Very punny
The best Kelvin jokes are 0K. ;)
That’s cold bro 🥶
Chill
Absolutely!
That's rock bottom
Too bad it as 236 degrees Kelvin... An engineer would never (!) get a unit wrong, its engineering blasphemy
A comedian laughs at the locals for being so nerdy they understand Celsius. Only in America!
Nope, not Celsius, Kelvin. 0 Kelvin is absolute 0. If I remember right, 0 Celsius is 273.15 Kelvin. And if you want it in Kelvin, you truly are a nerd.
@@thedabblingwarlockthat looks about right
@@thedabblingwarlockmodern SI Celsius is just Kelvin offset by 273.15, if you understand one you understand both.
@@Vivi-yw1eu The divisions are the same, and it'd be more accurate to say that Kelvin is based off of Celsius, but calibrated to absolute zero. (Celsius came first and Kelvin is based off of it. The SI system may use Kelvin to define Celsius, but that doesn't change that Celsius came first.) But no one outside of some scientific and engineering professions uses Kelvin, really. That's the joke.
And as for if you understand one, you understand both, I disagree. I'd say that if you understand Kelvin you understand both, but go ask any random person anywhere in the world, and not just the US, what Kelvin is and I bet the odds are really good they don't have a clue. It's kinda like saying every millennial or zoomer knows how technology works. I can guarantee you that most of them don't. Most couldn't even explain how a basic electric circuit works.
@@thedabblingwarlockand ultra nerds know that 0 Degrees Rankine is also absolute zero…
491.67 Rakine is zero Celsius…
Love your work!!! Absolutely hilarious!!
How good a comedian is becomes clear when he has to improvise because of people commenting in the audience, not just ignore them but creating a funny moment, that's when you know he is good :-) is a crazy IT guy I just love this, as a normal person also ;-)
"My new Internet service provider is Panera Bread." Absolutely me in my 20s.
I just found out about this comedian.
Why is there no Netflix Specials for us nerds? I'd watch a show like this! 🎉
Agreed.
RIP Fry's Electronics 😭
On target about Apple!
Since learning about Kelvin in my early teens, I have spent a lot of time thinking about Kelvin in and out of work contexts and now I experience a joke in Kelvin...So, so happy, I waited so long...(54 and yes, an engineer).
I would love to use Kelvin as the standard temperature scale! The nerdiest jokes keep killing me... you're amazing!
Rankine.
Love this guy!👍
Like seriously, why are people like this. They look at my Samsung and go "ewwww".
Iphones have better software and UI but Samsung has the better hardware and cameras.
result of a sunk cost probably, people tend to commit to otherwise bad decisions in that way
Put dinosaur stickers on it.
If they dare mention it, (instead of assuming something about your mental maturity), at least it is something else to talk about.
@@TwisterTornado What did any of this have to do with maturity.
@@Sleeper____1472 Nevermind. You appear to be under 20.
People treat Apple like their lives.
Android people are no different. Everyone chooses their camp lol
@@tophatxcc To be fair, it is a binary situation with mobile devices, either you use Android or iOS. OFC Apple's "security" has destroyed any value in repairing apple hardware, so I purely use Android
The Apple jehad is alive and well! Lol!! Shits no different from the Apple/Microsoft jehad from the 90s. The more things change the more they stay the same, the older I get the more I appreciate this saying.
So many lives with broken screens.
@@riel0563 I was friendly with a coworker that was a die hard apple guy, I myself was a Microsoft person (largely because the apple OS makes no sense to me and frustrated me). We had interesting conversations, he did try teaching me but I couldn't get past the idea that dropping your files in the trash=ejected media. In Microsoft that's one oops away from file retrieval. He on the other hand couldn't understand my obsession with having multiple ways of doing the same thing and customizing literally everything. Which is exactly why we fell into the camps we did.
Honestly, once we figure that out we got along pretty well. We still would fire shots at each other but for fun, you know like we found a new insulate to try.
That said I've been in the trenches, a dark place where occasionally you'll look at your own Allies and go "dude go by some comic books man, your freaking me out!". Where your own cubicle partner my snap and shank you with a ball point pen for saying os/2 was a superior OS back in the day. Where not having pipe dream set as your screen saver might end with a hit and run. Where your boss is so clueless he doesn't even know we gave him an actual mac because we hated him that much AND THE BONE HEAD NEVER FIGURED IT OUT AND HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE IN CHARGE OF USE!! The idiot just accepted the excuse it was "to advance" to run anything and we didn't have parties for a machine "that new" EVEN THOUGH IT WAS ALMOST OLIVE GREEN YOU BONEHEAD!
Sorry, think I was having a bad flashback there...
I don't know what's going on with the acoustics in half the places this guy makes videos, but sometimes I can't understand most of what he's saying. It's a shame because when I do understand, he's really funny.
He's funny when you don't as well.
@@DrunkenGaladialBut would be funnier if we could hear what he said.
It's just regular recording without professional recording equipment, microphones or sound proofing in a large room. Echoing off the walls is what you're going to get.
I've figured this RUclips thing out. If you see Don McMillan, hit like!
Such original content, love it
4:10 I am all too familiar with that struggle, I even sometimes brought laptops with me into Starbucks just so I could abuse their wifi because I wouldn't kill my data cap. My dad once tried to bring an Xbox 360 into starbucks and was told to GTFO after he was trying to do a bulk download when comcast said we hit our limit.
You just need a laptop to distract them and the xbox in a bag. Plug the Xbox in while pretending it's the laptop that's plugged in. So long as it's setup for their Wi-Fi in advance it should be fine.
Or power it via the vehicle and use a WiFi extender if it won't reach.
Underrated
If he mentioned Rankine, that would be hot!
Preach Don, preach
Include the Disciples of Elon and Te$la with the Apple part of the skit.
Is the stripper joint's WiFi protected though?
Probably more sanitary than McDonalds…
Don is a treasure!
Apple people have always been cult-like. Back when it was Motorola "PowerPC" vs Intel "x86" and it was understood that Apples are good for graphics but PCs are good for the other stuff. Those days were a fun time to be a PC hobbyist, when I could upgrade easily and cheaply compared to those guys who had Apple stickers on the back of their Subaru's.
I miss Fry's
Yeah. If Apple is a religion, then Fry's was the church.
@@mkvv5687id agree that Fry's was a temple to the pantheon of tech deities.
I am French and I don't have all jokes references. What a speed talk 😅
Oh, that is where he is wrong: Apple IS a religion! 🙂
Love the performance though.
Come on Don, Kelvin isn't in degrees.
Dang, I was 20 minutes late...
It's still bugging me that he said 236° . Kelvin is an absolute scale you don't use ° with those.
Hmm, good point, that's also really dang cold. However, I don't think it being an absolute scale has to do with it not using degrees, as the "other" absolute scale, Rankine, typically uses R° or Ra°.
@@redkeyspoke You are actually not supposed to use degree with Rankine scale either but alot of people do just 'cause they have a habit of using °C and °F. You can find authors who omit ° with R. It might also be related to °R (romer) scale which is not absolute.
new material yay
And then you find out that Photoshop is $20/month...
Naked Girls and Free Wi-Fi?! Now we just need some food and we're in business!
If Steve Jobs were to see the company that he created in its current form, he would not stop vomiting.
Rankine.
I see you too are a man of culture.
Those girls were so nice
Apple not a religion? That’s for the followers to decide. 💁♂️
Unfortunately this didn’t age well - “Fry’s” is history…
Anyone else learn Celsius temperatures from 3D printing?
🤣🤣🤣
dude this segement about apple is actually funnier then Bill Burr version
Don uses Windows 7? tsk tsk tsk
3:21 mins: any engineer would know not to use "degrees" on a Kelvin scale. A bit of a slip up there. Still, it was funny... so there is that.
The echoes in this video are horrible. I can hardly understand anything.
Jehovahs witnesses don’t believe Jesus is the Lord and savior.. details aside this is hilarious!
I will do river dance on your laptop.
I could not resist acknowledging this...and I tried...my god... XD
your voice isn't clear Bro ..
Religion is a business too
This is the best comment in the history of RUclips.
You know, I've seen way more people _assume_ I think my phone is better and need to be taken down a peg than I've seen iPhone people who actually think they're better than anyone in the last decade.
That's probably because you don't associate with those types of people, but they definitely do exist. I've met one earlier this year myself. He was annoying.
Is apple even a company? Or is apple a brand of Macintosh? Did they rebrand?
Anyway, worst kinda of marketing success. Successfully turning tools into Mediocre quality, completely overpriced, lifestyle accessories …
Apple is the company and Macintosh was the product.
@@henryjohnson-ville3834 Technically still is one of their products, just not their main focus anymore.
Ugh. This tired line, again. A person or thing can be a celebrity without being a god. And you can be a fan without being a worshiper. Why do people keep making this joke? It's tired and, worst of all, it's untrue. There are people who take pictures of every fun thing they do. I bought a Tesla, and there was a guy there are the place buying one, posing for the camera with his new car. Did I want to do it? No. But did it offend me somehow that he was that excited about his new car? To him, I say: good for you. For anybody getting wound up, I say: get over it. Give those people a break. They're just having a good time.
I actually think MacOS and iOS are better than Windows and Android. I'd still never buy an Apple device because
a) I use Linux on my PC, which is better than MacOS still, and I couldn't live without the freedom that OS provides
b) I'm not gonna pay four figures for a damn phone. Yes, there are also Android phones this expensive as well, but at least there are cheaper options; with Apple, even the cheapest new iPhone will cost you 500 dollars at least. For my use case, a 200 dollar Motorola phone does just fine; when I want to take high quality pictures, I just take my Sony camera with me that produces better images than any phone ever could.
c) the repairability of Apple devices is almost nonexistent. I'm pretty competent at fixing my own stuff; I've taken apart and successfully fixed tons of computers, laptops, phones, smart speakers etc., sometimes going as far as to solder in new ICs. I've repaired a MacBook exactly once, and it was such a pain in the a** that I never want to do it again. Who the hell thinks that using glue instead of screws for an electronic device is a good idea?!