Yesterday my therapist asked me what some of the things were that helped me most for my recovery, in terms of support, understanding, love and motivation. Let me tell you, you were second on the list. I feel like you don’t know how much you mean to people here and how much people admire you, because yes, you have ups and downs, hard days. But that’s the things, even people not in recovery do and you are honest. You show having these days and How to fight them. You put my mind straight, saying “No bull***”, making me realise that sometimes its my thoughts making the decision and not me. I’ll forever be grateful for you help and love through your Social media Meg, love you!!!!❤️
Maud Nijsen awwww bless you. It’s true what you say there though. Just because you get the thoughts doesn’t mean they’re right & doesn’t mean you need to act on them 😘
Can I just say, the way you share these exercises and advice from your therapy sessions is so so helpful. There's a lot of people who, for various reasons, therapy isn't really an option right now, but you sharing these things is brilliant. Really helps to provoke those recovery thoughts and provide access to helpful techniques that people not seeing a therapist would not otherwise have come across. Also I really think you're fantastic, the way you word things is so spot on even when it's about things often difficult to describe. Everything resonates so strongly and really makes me think long and hard. Thank you for all that you do!
Honestly I’ve been following you since you started this channel and please don’t for a minute forget how far you have come. Always look forward to your uploads. I couldn’t agree more with what you said about being a functioning anorexic/person with an eating disorder. I think that’s 99% of people I know with eating disorders, myself included. I have always said so many people just survive - and not live. Thank you for this. Xx
I have commented before and I really don’t know if I ought to worry or not. I am in my 40s so should know better but although I have never had an eating disorder I have always had very poor body image issues, have yo yo dieted for 30 years and definitely have displayed disordered eating habits. For 8 months I have done fasting after realising everyone seemed to be doing it. I will try to not mention numbers and upset people but wh n I started I had around 40 pounds to lose to reach a mid b.m.i. And was encouraged to as I saw it help myself because I have serious chronic illnesses and pain- lupus, fibromyalgia and spinal osteoporosis ad so I thought and was told by my doctor that being at the correct weight and staying there would help me. Since then I have been overwhelmed by this, think about food or how little I can eat all the time, and now do full 24 hours of fasting up to 4 days a week easily. After the initial 2 weeks began to realise my hunger cues were turned off and now. Truly could take food or leave or as I never felt hungry. I lost that weight in the first 4 months and now am really terrified at re gaining, do I need to worry.?
Remembering to question 'weight restored' "by whose standards?" you are absolutely right about. The whole thing is massively complex. I mean, if we all went to the moon we would weigh nothing! If we're weighed in the middle of the day with all our clothes on it again will be different to say, the morning without. Our bodies are built to keep us alive. They are amazing, they know what they are doing and we must learn to be at peace with them so they can let us live the life we want - and deserve - to live. Thank you for another great video Meg, I was so so happy to see you got some supper!! I bet all the other girls were wishing they had! xxx
H yes & also even in the morning your body, my body, your friends body... they all have different natural weights. You could be the same weight as some else & their body could be happy & healthy there, but it might be too light for your body. Or vice versa. Only our body can really decide it’s own happy healthy weight
Found this video incredibly helpful, and relatable! Thankyou Meg! I am finding quasi recovery a challenge, as I know I still have many fears, rules/some habits. This has made me reflect, that I have still been trying to keep my weight at where I "think it should be". Although I have been making many changes, and have had many wins - the ED is still trying to be in-control and asking me to stay "safe". Argh! But, as I have heard full recovery is worth it!!
It’s amazing how long you can keep trying to convince yourself you’re fine & at the right weight & bla bla bla... & then you look back on the last 5 years & think hang on 🤔
Your vlog is one of the best, maybe even the best, ed recovery vlogs I have seen. It avoids the triggers that most ed recovery blogs don’t try to avoid AT ALL, and it calls out the ed bullshit at a very deep level. You should be really, really proud of yourself and what you are doing to help others.
Coffee and Meg, my fav way to start my Saturday! This may sound dumb but since I’m not in a relationship, I live in a new city with no friends....I don’t know how to live life or enjoy my life...because I’m alone, literally. So I focus on what I know, food and weight. I try to do new things by myself but it’s hard to enjoy when I’m all by myself. Quasi recovery....still me. Guess I need to find the life I want to live even if I’m totally alone. Good journal activity! Your like my therapy, giving me encouragement for the week!!! 💕💕.
Carolyn Harrison Carolyn Harrison bless you, it’s so hard knowing where to start isn’t it. Did you watch my video about the pie chart of life & self worth? It helped me a lot to think about building balance in my life, & having more things to fill my time than food or body. Sometimes it’s paying more attention to an existing segment of you chart (maybe seeing a friend more) & sometimes it’s building new segments (maybe a hobby, learn a language, take up piano). It was a really helpful concept to me... although I don’t think I’ve explained it well there. Either way go easy on yourself. It takes time. Look how long it had taken to construct your ED world, you won’t break it down & replace it over night 😘😘😘
I understand, feel just as you. What helps me is to write my "motivating diary" - just write there what I want to do the next day including cleaning, shopping, particuar things and task, like ironing, paying bills, washing up, but also making a face mask, going to haidresser, reading, trying the new course of yoga etc...it helps me much, try it, if you like!
@@megsyrecovery191 I remember that video you did with the pie chart, yes, I will definitely go back and listen to that one. And start making a bucket-list of things that I enjoy but don't do by myself, and challenge myself to just do them (like going to a movie..going to a coffee shop...a hike...driving to a nearby town, etc). One thing at a time. Thanks for that reminder of the pie chart!! :)
@@kenya7052 Hi Kenya! Thanks for the response. Glad I'm not the only one I have my to-do list that I always organize my days around, but never thought of putting those other things on there like "face mask" or even "find one new thing to do this weekend". I'll try it! Thank you!
Super I wish you luck, it is not always succesful for me, I have some bad days, but we will manage it, you will see :-) There are always ups and down. I also had days when I only was able to cook, have a shower and eat and the rest of the time I was sitting at my laptop searching for how to eat best, what other people eat and cook and what I already have damaged by my ilness - was like selfdestroying, as I always was finding articles how my heart fail down, my kidneyse, bones...etc. And I felt much worse as I thought it is not worth of healing as everything is lost. Ok, I have osteoporosis now, but I believe that our bodies are able to healourselves as well as our soul is. :-)
I wish my psychologist was as helpful as yours!!! Two days ago was my 21st birthday and I woke up with my period!! I hadn’t had it in more than a year so it was the best present ever (never thought i’d say that) I am now at my set point and with my period so i’m the healthiest physically i’ve been in ages, i just need to work on my mind now and you’re so helpful for that meg ❤️
I just came across this post from Brene Brown moments before I watched your powerful, motivating video. Quote: "It's not fear that gets in the way of showing up - it’s armor. It’s the behaviors we use to self-protect. We can be afraid and brave at the same time. Armor suffocates courage and cages our hearts. The goal is to create spaces where armor is neither necessary nor rewarded." - Brene Brown. How true it is, I have used Anorexia as my armor, i believed it in it, I thought it was protecting me. It allowed me to function under strict rules. I have found myself stuck in the quasi mud for the past 6 weeks, I'm scared, afraid to drop more of my armor, truthfully I keep turning my head the other way (for one more day) I've got to rescue myself and leap out again. Your post has been such a great help today, thank you so much, Meg. x
Such an eye opening video again. I know I am in quasi recovery, there is no bullshitting around with that. The trickiest thing for me about this stage is that you feel alright. You feel like you accomplish so much because you are doing "so much" better than you did when you were properly engaging in anorexia. I am just below a "Healthy BMI" and getting there scares the shit out of me but what the fuck do I want my life to be? Sometimes I look at pictures where I was my highest weight and get so afraid of returning but then I also look at these pictures and do not remember at ALL what I ate that day. What a concept. The pictures of the past 2 years immediately remind me of what foods I missed that day. How sad is that? That is actually tragical, when all I associate with even the happiest of days is how I still wasn't quite happy because I thought of food. No skinny jeans is worth that. For me anorexia is also a tool of showing people I hurt inside, but how about WORDS?! Sorry for this long rant but guys, I want to create happy memories! I want you all to never reduce yourself to what you eat. We are more than that. Life is more than that.
Your psychologist sounds amazing. Love the idea of where you want to be in 1,3 years time etc. Your right that is just short term joy over what the number says etc. Really good post thank you. X
Sarah Clark she’s amazing. Definitely do the 1,3,5 years thing. It was so impactful for me. I still think about it now if I’m tempted to restrict or do something ED. Hope you’re getting on well at home hun 😘
@@megsyrecovery191 yes so helpful I try to keep the long term/enduring happiness in my mind instead of the quick fix buzz/relieve in the moment whenever I make a choice. But this is still really difficult as the feelings haven't changed yet. Perhaps repetition is key here
Marit Voogd definitely repetition, & be careful not to do little quick fixes after a big “win” to try & counter act it, because that just keeps you stuck long term. It’s taken MONTHS of me doing opposite actions & not falling for my temptations for them to stop being so automatic & for me to stop feeling guilty when I don’t act on my thoughts.... & it’s still by no means gone. I still get temptation / guilt now. Just less frequently & less intensely
Ok - that shot of the birthday! That’s the ultimate goal and so inspiring!! Do you remember talking about how you admired people who just had a burger even if no one else was - how cool those kind of women are?! Empowered?! 😃 I think you might be one of those cool women 😁😘xxx
I've been in quasi-recovery for quite a while now and just like you I'm just sick of it because I'm not living my life the way I want to. Pushing myself to keep going is actually really hard and I'm trying to argue the same way (that I'm never gonna be completely ED-free unless I get out of quasi-recovery), but actually hearing it from somebody else (especially you) is so helpful. So thank you so much for talking about this!
I’m definitely stuck in quasi recovery. Yes I’m a healthy BMI (23 def not the low end of healthy) but I’m still terrified of gaining weight and I try and control my food and exercise to manipulate my body. I feel like sometimes I’ll never get over my fear of just completely letting go.
Teresa Marie yeh if you’re restricting or exercising to maintain a weight then it might not be where your body wants to be. Your body doesn’t know what a BMI chart is 🤦♀️ you can do it hun xxx
I hope you know even a little bit of how absolutely helpful, inspirational and amazing you are ! You are also such a joy to listen to. Thank you for sharing all that you do. You are saving people. Cheers!
Quasi recovery is so real and I have seen people in huge denials while being on this place. No judgement because if that's what rocks their boat, amazing. But for me, I pretty much agree with you that I want to feel free around food and not still have little rules or do's and dont's cause that is what I got tired of and got in recovery because of. Thank you for making these videos.
Megsy you are so amazing and your videos are so on point! I'm in this hellish quasi recovery now and have been since age 15 (I'm 19 now) and I honestly think it's worse in some ways than full illness because I'm miserable and restricted and don't even have the fleeting satisfaction of being skinny! Really liked this video though, and thanks for your honesty and your tips. Your channel literally keeps me sane sometimes. Wish you only the best 💕
I’m going to celebrate my birthday today and I have no idea what I’m going to eat, but I’ve been stuck in quasi-recovery, and when I do let go, I gain weight, especially if I eat what some people class as junk food with lots of carbs, and I reach a healthy BMI-and I can’t tolerate it, so I put myself back in quasi-recovery. I think of that saying,: you can’t make a fat person thin or a thin person fat, and justify it that way, semi-believing that any weight is my natural weight because I’ve managed to reach it. Anyway, your channel is inspirational and helpful, please keep going.
Awww thank you so much for doing this vlog Meg, I really appreciate it after my message! It’s true..the 1, 3 & 5 year lists have been super helpful. These past few weeks I’ve definitely realised I’ve been trying to recover at some nonsense “skinny” (suppressed) weight and wow that’s not a life to lead..so even with being poorly with other things, I’m trying to fully embrace it and live life properly. I was and still am shit scared..but I’ve also discovered I make the best tasting chocolate brownies, ever 😂😍xxx
Megsy Recovery of course! It’s 3 eggs, 300g caster sugar, 75g flour (although I generally do 60/65 so it’s nicer!), 40g cocoa powder, dark choc 150g and 175g butter. Then I normally cut up 3 rows of white choc into small chunks, freeze it and then fold into the mix just before baking. It’s amazing😍😍
I’m going through and re-watching all your videos in order. You are so helpful in so many ways. Love you analogy of a “functioning anorexic”. Definitely there right now.
It's so true what you said about what attracts you to other people. I NEVER cared about the looks of any of my friends. My AN is more a way to controll my anxiety and past trauma. The way I view my body wasn't the main part, it just happened as I lost more and more weight. It's so difficult to describe... But anyway I think I'm kind of stuck in quasi recovery now and there was always something I wanted to focus more on than my health. Like "Oh, but the exams are hard enough without your brain screaming at you. Just wait until you have more time..." But you just inspired me to try harder and go grocery shopping today and buy something I really fancy! :D
I think for a lot of us as we recover, it is harder to shake quasi recovery than it is to get to the 'weight restored' point. I gave up ballet and dance as a teenager in my recover, partially to remove myself from the 'skinny' environment and partially to move the focus to general schoolwork rather than physical stuff. When i gave up the ED completely, I plateaued at BMI 24. More than before my ED. I think after being in starvation mode our body raises our set point so that we have some reserves in case of another famine (to our body there is no difference between an ED and a famine from outside causes). As years past and no famine reappeared (I was lucky and never relapsed), I think our body is confident in the food supply and your set point can lower. Mine dropped again and I didn't change anything on purpose. If you are recovering, it is not fun, but maybe you might be the same as me and need to accept being a higher weight for some time after recovery. By some time, I mean years not months, as your body compensates for the starvation we put it through. With time, i think most will bounce back. i'm not a professional of any sort but this was my experience. it is worth it to not be in a quasi recovered state, I promise, even if I wasn't the happiest with my weight during those years.
Allybeetulk I’m so proud of you. I don’t even know you. I hope you thank yourself every day for having the guts to let your body be & to stop interfering & to give it time to level out itself. Even if it’s not the exact place you want it to be. Is it worth sacrificing all our life to hold our weight below where it’s naturally meant to be? Well done in your recovery 💛
This was exactly what I needed to hear! It helped me realize that this is not how I want the rest of my life to be. Thank you so much for making these videos.
You videos are incredible. You put words to things that I have never been able to articulate. Thank you so much and your logic is so helpful for me because i thrive off of that advice and your videos are honestly so helpful! Thank you x100000000 :)
Thank you for another great video! Even though I'm almost following my meal plan 100 % every day, I still struggle with a lot of ED thoughts and I'm really dependent on these few items of food or food brands, so I still have a lot to work on in recovery. For me something weird that has also made it hard to embrace recovery is missing inpatient, however strange that must sound. I don't know, I just felt really safe there, there was always a nurse to talk to if I needed. I'm also really obsessed with the fact that I was only there for 5 weeks, which is much shorter than other people, so I really need to go there again and stay for a longer period of time to really get the help I need. I know a lot of this has to do with my other mental health problems, especially I guess borderline personality disorder, which they tried to diagnose me with while in IP, but couldn't since I didn't fit all the diagnostic criteria, even though I fit most. So for some reason I'm really stuck in this place where I want to go back to IP, which really isn't helpful when it comes to recovery. I haven't written letters to my future self, but thinking about where I want to be in 5 years or so really helps me! I'm 25 right now, and am still working on my bachelor's degree, so I'm having some sort of age crisis where I feel like I'm so behind everyone else and need to catch up. I'm trying to take this age crisis anxiety and make it into something more positive that helps me fight my ED and work towards getting my degree.
Cessie do the 1, 3, 5 years time exercise hun. Sounds like you’re very stuck in how ill you are & how ill you’ve been & all these thoughts which your ED floods you with (not your fault)... but times not standing still. Your life is still ticking past & other people are moving on with theirs. When you look back on your life will you be glad about what you weighed & how many weeks IP you had!? Or will you be gutted that you spent the one life toy get obsessing over numbers & your body & illness? It helped me a LOT to step back & get that perspective on what I was doing with my life & what was actually important to me. Hope that helps 😘😘😘
Thank you for your videos, you are just so honest about how hard this all is. I'm watching all these videos of recovered people who seem to know all the answers and make it seem simple, which makes me feel shit for not being able to recover, you are such a role model I can relate to. I thought I was recovered for years because I ate what I wanted and didn't care about my body (also not a healthy lifestyle) but actually I still had rules and fear foods. Now I'm back in full blown anorexia/orthorexia again, things went downhill so fast probably because I was actually never fully recovered. I am struggling to think myself into wanting to recover, wish I could find a therapist like yours she sounds great. I've been in therapy for years for depression and nobody has ever been helpful. Anyway I'm rambling sorry, just to say you seem so nice and genuine and I'm glad I found your channel, you make it seem a little more possible, thank you for sharing something so difficult with us x
I remember me "enjoying a trip" with friends, the situations like sight seeing - the other concern of the buildings, paintings, things around and I was still percieving it only half way (if so..) and my thoughts were still flying out to "when will we have the snack? diner?" .."what are we going to have and when"?...."how much sugar could be there in that icecream which I did not like it at all - I should have the other it would be better and not so sweet....bla bla"....terrible, shit...and I was always pretending to be fine. And also I often felt so tired, but I kicked up myself with another coffee or zero cola...hmm. I was hurtin myself constantly
Kenya wow, that makes me exhausted just reading that, never mind loving it! So sad how we stay trapped in this tricking ourselves that we’re ok & functioning 🙈
thanks, well, I hope I am on the right way now, I have the same opinion on the proces of healing and I want to let the old habbits and circles behind me. Anyway, I think that many people today do have PPP in a sort of way. I can often see eliminating this and that from diet (with no reason in fact..) or obsessing with going to the gym, counting macross etc. Those people only do not consider themselves sick as they are in a good shape or healthy weight. Here we have a big advantege, we already know, that this is not normall, it is limitting. O do not want to be limited e.g. I am at concert..feel hungry, they only have hot dog or a burger there - ok it is not an example of clean eating but shit who cares? I like it, I am hungry I have it! and without "gulity pleasure" only with pleasure :-D
Hey Megsy, I love this video and what i find most interesting is actually that those behaviours and thought you describe as part of quasi recovery, are really quite common and perfectly acceptable for non-disordered people in our society. I guess that was my excuse to stay in quasi for so long! Cause everybody around me was telling the same things I would hear in my mind. Just, for me they were distructive!!
Valeria Di Gaetano yeh it’s weird how much disordered eating there is in society, but I kind of think for me that is just totally off the table. I can never dabble in any of that because of my history
Megsy Recovery Same for me right now! It’s too importante to be aware of the effect that things that may be normal for others have on us (and this is also true for life in general) and really take responsability for our own happiness. Thank you!! 😘
Thank you for for videos. You are so relatable. It’s beautiful watching your progress. Especially love all the nuggets of info from your psychologist. It really is wonderfully helpful ❤️. Thank you for taking the time to help so many.
My BMI before my eating disorder was 21, when I was barely exercising and eating way too much shit. My ED feels happy knowing that I could be lower naturally, so even though I’m not even within a healthy BMI range, I still restrict to try and lose weight for different events, and suppress my weight to my ED’s standards. I want to completely recover and I’m aware that it’ll have to happen someday, but feeling the weight gain is so uncomfortable and it always causes a relapse, especially because my ED was mainly triggered by the looks of those around me
Urghh I was stuck in quasi for 6 years - and actually thought that was as good as it gets! Yes its a lot better than full blown anorexia or bulimia, but its no way to live. Surviving not thriving. Life is for living - YES! xx
THIS. thank you for this. Your psychologist sounds amazing. I sometimes I feel like I get more helpful tricks/tools from your videos that. I get from my appointments here... Lol
Thank you for this Megs! Kicked me up the arse to change my breakfast around this morning and stop living in that Groundhog Day. I had different food, sat in a different place (my bed!!) and much earlier than usual too because why put off eating? Thank you!! I wondered, did you ever find your wedding rings or get an equally gorgeous replacement? I never see them in your vids!
Loved this video, thank you for once again sharing your wisdom 💛 it feels very relevant for me right now. Could I ask, how do you remind yourself of these things everyday your psychologist and yourself work on? I feel I make these revelations but then forget them in the moment and was wondering if you had any advice on this? Love to you xxx
Haych Chad I try to keep really effective & easy to remember things to hand. Opposite actions. Bren, babies, bones. Break the cycle. What life do I want to be? Who do I want to be? Rather than try to challenge & rationalise every thought, I try to use effective things that work in the minute. Also making lists of the pros of recovery & the shit things about being ill to keep me connected to what I need to do. That helped 😘
I don't know how to get out of my relapse... I feel miserable but I still feel like I don't want to get out of that. It feels kind if normal ..like ...my life..
I am far enough into recovery that I know I don’t want to go back to bad habits, but I’m struggling with hating how I look in photos and in the mirror. Anyway. Thanks for sharing everything-it does help. 🙃
Ellen Mason I found I got more comfortable with time in my new body. But I don’t really spend long looking in the mirror. Some photos I hate but then I try to remind myself the life I’m able to live in this body. Is it worth throwing my whole life away again to look a bit smaller in photo? Not really
Megsy Recovery Thanks. It’s actually comforting to know that it can still be hard to like the way your current body looks. And you are so very right about being able to live in this new body.
Hey, I watched another video that resonates a lot with your topic here and it might help you understand the problem better: Kayla Rose Kotecki: Why you had more energy when restricting/dieting and less energy (lethargic) in recovery. She has her own book and the website @t
Does anyone have any advice on how to handle family based treatment where your parents and family have complete control over what I eat? I just got stuck with this treatment and I am having massive anxiety over losing my control
I loveeeee you so so soooomuch! Thank you for YOU 🙏! Do you ever experienced extreme hunger? Or do you still experience it? Do you have tips for it how you responded to it? Xxxx
Rachael Erin I love reading!! & a lot comes through recommendations from other people. Also I have a kindle & just go through the top charts there, or the Richard & Judy book club, but I find them really hit & miss. They’re either amazing or rubbish 😂
Can I ask... you talk about responding g to extreme hunger before as well as following a meal plan. Did you respond within the meal plan or honour cravings or were they 2 separate parts of recovery at different times? If I struggle will guilt when I overeat am I better trying to follow a meal plan with a dietician rather than following through when extreme hunger hits? I’m worried about getting stuck in a binge purge cycle?
what about smaller bodies is it possible/normal that your weight will plaeteu in a bit under bmi or just in the smallest amount of bmi or having lesser fat percentage?is it still healthy or should you try to increase still?
I left the hospital in quasy recovery (physically recovered but not mentally) and I relapsed. Now in the worst... I am trying to eat so much more but my big deal is also not exercise or compulsory movement. How do you deal with that? Do you do some kind or exercise? Did you do? Thank you so much!
M F no, thankfully I’ve never really had that compulsion. I think it’s the same as food though, in the sense of opposite actions, don’t act on the thoughts & temptations or you’ll stay trapped it them. Lots of love 😘
love this video megsy thank you 🙏🏽. you said the being skinny & fitting smaller clothes are short-term happiness. but what if you've always wanted to look better than others, or that being a fashionable person & were always known for looking great... it makes me happy however shallow it is, but I don't think it's a short-term one. What can I do to accept that I might still look good in a bigger body? Lots of love 💕
It's not worth the stress of an eating disorder! No one is going to remember you just because your thin! They will remember you for the experiences together. And you need to be mentally recovered to have good experiences like that!
you're so right. I totally get that. but also want to look my best like most normal people. letting yourself go is not healthy, not is having an ED. I'm trying to train my brain to have different values but I've finding weighting over a certain point very scary and fundamentally against my values. Thank you for your respond. @@orangepulp392
I’d probably just try & question is it genuine happiness... is it what you will look back on aged 80 & feel happy about? & then 2nd question, is it worth sacrificing your whole life to achieve?... so by that I mean Is it worth missing out on relationships & eating out? Is it worth thinking about food for every waking second? Is it worth fighting your body & denying it food? If the answer to all of those is yes then I can’t really help I’m afraid. Sometimes it takes time to realise how awful an existence having an ED is. & sometimes you need to lose enough of your life to it to realise it’s not the best use of the one life we get
Thank you so much for replying. the answer to all those questions is NO. I've lost half my life to eat, and I can't imagine living like that for another 15 yrs. I'll right these questions down and remind myself of the hell this ED has made me live. so proud of your recovery & always motivates me to do what you do when faced with challenges. lots of love 💜@@megsyrecovery191
I feel like I am basically recovered, but the thoughts are still always there. I could be out with friends and having fun but...the guilt and the anxiety hang around.
Maureen Seel is that recovered though? I don’t know 🤷♀️ are they getting less with time? I think that’s what’s happening to me, they still come but a lot less frequently
Yesterday my therapist asked me what some of the things were that helped me most for my recovery, in terms of support, understanding, love and motivation. Let me tell you, you were second on the list. I feel like you don’t know how much you mean to people here and how much people admire you, because yes, you have ups and downs, hard days. But that’s the things, even people not in recovery do and you are honest. You show having these days and How to fight them. You put my mind straight, saying “No bull***”, making me realise that sometimes its my thoughts making the decision and not me. I’ll forever be grateful for you help and love through your Social media Meg, love you!!!!❤️
Maud Nijsen awwww bless you. It’s true what you say there though. Just because you get the thoughts doesn’t mean they’re right & doesn’t mean you need to act on them 😘
Can I just say, the way you share these exercises and advice from your therapy sessions is so so helpful. There's a lot of people who, for various reasons, therapy isn't really an option right now, but you sharing these things is brilliant. Really helps to provoke those recovery thoughts and provide access to helpful techniques that people not seeing a therapist would not otherwise have come across. Also I really think you're fantastic, the way you word things is so spot on even when it's about things often difficult to describe. Everything resonates so strongly and really makes me think long and hard. Thank you for all that you do!
Jess Garrett glad I can share it. I’m so lucky to have had such amazing help 🙏
Honestly I’ve been following you since you started this channel and please don’t for a minute forget how far you have come. Always look forward to your uploads.
I couldn’t agree more with what you said about being a functioning anorexic/person with an eating disorder. I think that’s 99% of people I know with eating disorders, myself included. I have always said so many people just survive - and not live. Thank you for this. Xx
Madison Killer yep, sadly it’s very true!
I have commented before and I really don’t know if I ought to worry or not. I am in my 40s so should know better but although I have never had an eating disorder I have always had very poor body image issues, have yo yo dieted for 30 years and definitely have displayed disordered eating habits. For 8 months I have done fasting after realising everyone seemed to be doing it. I will try to not mention numbers and upset people but wh n I started I had around 40 pounds to lose to reach a mid b.m.i. And was encouraged to as I saw it help myself because I have serious chronic illnesses and pain- lupus, fibromyalgia and spinal osteoporosis ad so I thought and was told by my doctor that being at the correct weight and staying there would help me. Since then I have been overwhelmed by this, think about food or how little I can eat all the time, and now do full 24 hours of fasting up to 4 days a week easily. After the initial 2 weeks began to realise my hunger cues were turned off and now. Truly could take food or leave or as I never felt hungry. I lost that weight in the first 4 months and now am really terrified at re gaining, do I need to worry.?
Remembering to question 'weight restored' "by whose standards?" you are absolutely right about. The whole thing is massively complex. I mean, if we all went to the moon we would weigh nothing! If we're weighed in the middle of the day with all our clothes on it again will be different to say, the morning without. Our bodies are built to keep us alive. They are amazing, they know what they are doing and we must learn to be at peace with them so they can let us live the life we want - and deserve - to live. Thank you for another great video Meg, I was so so happy to see you got some supper!! I bet all the other girls were wishing they had! xxx
H yes & also even in the morning your body, my body, your friends body... they all have different natural weights. You could be the same weight as some else & their body could be happy & healthy there, but it might be too light for your body. Or vice versa. Only our body can really decide it’s own happy healthy weight
@@megsyrecovery191 "only our body can really decide it’s own happy healthy weight" -> well said! We should not compare.
Found this video incredibly helpful, and relatable! Thankyou Meg! I am finding quasi recovery a challenge, as I know I still have many fears, rules/some habits. This has made me reflect, that I have still been trying to keep my weight at where I "think it should be". Although I have been making many changes, and have had many wins - the ED is still trying to be in-control and asking me to stay "safe".
Argh! But, as I have heard full recovery is worth it!!
It’s amazing how long you can keep trying to convince yourself you’re fine & at the right weight & bla bla bla... & then you look back on the last 5 years & think hang on 🤔
Your vlog is one of the best, maybe even the best, ed recovery vlogs I have seen. It avoids the triggers that most ed recovery blogs don’t try to avoid AT ALL, and it calls out the ed bullshit at a very deep level. You should be really, really proud of yourself and what you are doing to help others.
Melanie Jones 💛💛 glad they can help xxx
Coffee and Meg, my fav way to start my Saturday! This may sound dumb but since I’m not in a relationship, I live in a new city with no friends....I don’t know how to live life or enjoy my life...because I’m alone, literally. So I focus on what I know, food and weight. I try to do new things by myself but it’s hard to enjoy when I’m all by myself. Quasi recovery....still me. Guess I need to find the life I want to live even if I’m totally alone. Good journal activity! Your like my therapy, giving me encouragement for the week!!! 💕💕.
Carolyn Harrison Carolyn Harrison bless you, it’s so hard knowing where to start isn’t it. Did you watch my video about the pie chart of life & self worth? It helped me a lot to think about building balance in my life, & having more things to fill my time than food or body. Sometimes it’s paying more attention to an existing segment of you chart (maybe seeing a friend more) & sometimes it’s building new segments (maybe a hobby, learn a language, take up piano). It was a really helpful concept to me... although I don’t think I’ve explained it well there. Either way go easy on yourself. It takes time. Look how long it had taken to construct your ED world, you won’t break it down & replace it over night 😘😘😘
I understand, feel just as you. What helps me is to write my "motivating diary" - just write there what I want to do the next day including cleaning, shopping, particuar things and task, like ironing, paying bills, washing up, but also making a face mask, going to haidresser, reading, trying the new course of yoga etc...it helps me much, try it, if you like!
@@megsyrecovery191 I remember that video you did with the pie chart, yes, I will definitely go back and listen to that one. And start making a bucket-list of things that I enjoy but don't do by myself, and challenge myself to just do them (like going to a movie..going to a coffee shop...a hike...driving to a nearby town, etc). One thing at a time. Thanks for that reminder of the pie chart!! :)
@@kenya7052 Hi Kenya! Thanks for the response. Glad I'm not the only one I have my to-do list that I always organize my days around, but never thought of putting those other things on there like "face mask" or even "find one new thing to do this weekend". I'll try it! Thank you!
Super I wish you luck, it is not always succesful for me, I have some bad days, but we will manage it, you will see :-) There are always ups and down. I also had days when I only was able to cook, have a shower and eat and the rest of the time I was sitting at my laptop searching for how to eat best, what other people eat and cook and what I already have damaged by my ilness - was like selfdestroying, as I always was finding articles how my heart fail down, my kidneyse, bones...etc. And I felt much worse as I thought it is not worth of healing as everything is lost. Ok, I have osteoporosis now, but I believe that our bodies are able to healourselves as well as our soul is. :-)
I wish my psychologist was as helpful as yours!!!
Two days ago was my 21st birthday and I woke up with my period!! I hadn’t had it in more than a year so it was the best present ever (never thought i’d say that) I am now at my set point and with my period so i’m the healthiest physically i’ve been in ages, i just need to work on my mind now and you’re so helpful for that meg ❤️
Carmen happy birthday!! Keep going. Keep giving your body what it needs & your mind will recover gradually 😘
Glad to hear so..
I just came across this post from Brene Brown moments before I watched your powerful, motivating video.
Quote: "It's not fear that gets in the way of showing up - it’s armor. It’s the behaviors we use to self-protect. We can be afraid and brave at the same time.
Armor suffocates courage and cages our hearts. The goal is to create spaces where armor is neither necessary nor rewarded." - Brene Brown.
How true it is, I have used Anorexia as my armor, i believed it in it, I thought it was protecting me. It allowed me to function under strict rules.
I have found myself stuck in the quasi mud for the past 6 weeks, I'm scared, afraid to drop more of my armor, truthfully I keep turning my head the other way (for one more day) I've got to rescue myself and leap out again.
Your post has been such a great help today, thank you so much, Meg. x
So so true! & life can’t move in until the ED has gone & the armour is down enough to make some space 😘
Quasi-recovery is like breathing through a straw. You have to focus on that whatever you are experiencing.
You are such a precious person! You have no idea how much you are helping. Everything you say is so true and so helpful and important! Thank you!!!
Healthylicious 💛💛
Such an eye opening video again. I know I am in quasi recovery, there is no bullshitting around with that. The trickiest thing for me about this stage is that you feel alright. You feel like you accomplish so much because you are doing "so much" better than you did when you were properly engaging in anorexia. I am just below a "Healthy BMI" and getting there scares the shit out of me but what the fuck do I want my life to be? Sometimes I look at pictures where I was my highest weight and get so afraid of returning but then I also look at these pictures and do not remember at ALL what I ate that day. What a concept. The pictures of the past 2 years immediately remind me of what foods I missed that day. How sad is that? That is actually tragical, when all I associate with even the happiest of days is how I still wasn't quite happy because I thought of food. No skinny jeans is worth that. For me anorexia is also a tool of showing people I hurt inside, but how about WORDS?! Sorry for this long rant but guys, I want to create happy memories! I want you all to never reduce yourself to what you eat. We are more than that. Life is more than that.
Love to start my Saturdays with a Morning Megsy Motivation. Thank you x
You have so got this ! I need to hit replay on this video on the daily ! Wow ! Thank you meg spot on!!!
Your psychologist sounds amazing. Love the idea of where you want to be in 1,3 years time etc. Your right that is just short term joy over what the number says etc. Really good post thank you. X
Sarah Clark she’s amazing. Definitely do the 1,3,5 years thing. It was so impactful for me. I still think about it now if I’m tempted to restrict or do something ED. Hope you’re getting on well at home hun 😘
@@megsyrecovery191 yes so helpful I try to keep the long term/enduring happiness in my mind instead of the quick fix buzz/relieve in the moment whenever I make a choice. But this is still really difficult as the feelings haven't changed yet. Perhaps repetition is key here
Marit Voogd definitely repetition, & be careful not to do little quick fixes after a big “win” to try & counter act it, because that just keeps you stuck long term. It’s taken MONTHS of me doing opposite actions & not falling for my temptations for them to stop being so automatic & for me to stop feeling guilty when I don’t act on my thoughts.... & it’s still by no means gone. I still get temptation / guilt now. Just less frequently & less intensely
Ok - that shot of the birthday! That’s the ultimate goal and so inspiring!! Do you remember talking about how you admired people who just had a burger even if no one else was - how cool those kind of women are?! Empowered?! 😃 I think you might be one of those cool women 😁😘xxx
AZKflamenco that’s exactly what I spoke about. That is SO the kind of woman I respect & want to be 🙋♀️
I've been in quasi-recovery for quite a while now and just like you I'm just sick of it because I'm not living my life the way I want to. Pushing myself to keep going is actually really hard and I'm trying to argue the same way (that I'm never gonna be completely ED-free unless I get out of quasi-recovery), but actually hearing it from somebody else (especially you) is so helpful. So thank you so much for talking about this!
I’m definitely stuck in quasi recovery. Yes I’m a healthy BMI (23 def not the low end of healthy) but I’m still terrified of gaining weight and I try and control my food and exercise to manipulate my body. I feel like sometimes I’ll never get over my fear of just completely letting go.
Teresa Marie yeh if you’re restricting or exercising to maintain a weight then it might not be where your body wants to be. Your body doesn’t know what a BMI chart is 🤦♀️ you can do it hun xxx
I hope you know even a little bit of how absolutely helpful, inspirational and amazing you are ! You are also such a joy to listen to. Thank you for sharing all that you do. You are saving people. Cheers!
Quasi recovery is so real and I have seen people in huge denials while being on this place. No judgement because if that's what rocks their boat, amazing. But for me, I pretty much agree with you that I want to feel free around food and not still have little rules or do's and dont's cause that is what I got tired of and got in recovery because of. Thank you for making these videos.
Megsy you are so amazing and your videos are so on point! I'm in this hellish quasi recovery now and have been since age 15 (I'm 19 now) and I honestly think it's worse in some ways than full illness because I'm miserable and restricted and don't even have the fleeting satisfaction of being skinny! Really liked this video though, and thanks for your honesty and your tips. Your channel literally keeps me sane sometimes. Wish you only the best 💕
I’m going to celebrate my birthday today and I have no idea what I’m going to eat, but I’ve been stuck in quasi-recovery, and when I do let go, I gain weight, especially if I eat what some people class as junk food with lots of carbs, and I reach a healthy BMI-and I can’t tolerate it, so I put myself back in quasi-recovery. I think of that saying,: you can’t make a fat person thin or a thin person fat, and justify it that way, semi-believing that any weight is my natural weight because I’ve managed to reach it.
Anyway, your channel is inspirational and helpful, please keep going.
SerenaToxicat we can’t trick our body’s or fight our natural biology.... not along side a free & life & head space anyway. Happy birthday 🥳
Than came Meg❤️sy, & things began making sense! What an incredible heart that keeps on giving! 🤗🙏🏻😇
rita conte love yoooou 💛
Awww thank you so much for doing this vlog Meg, I really appreciate it after my message! It’s true..the 1, 3 & 5 year lists have been super helpful. These past few weeks I’ve definitely realised I’ve been trying to recover at some nonsense “skinny” (suppressed) weight and wow that’s not a life to lead..so even with being poorly with other things, I’m trying to fully embrace it and live life properly. I was and still am shit scared..but I’ve also discovered I make the best tasting chocolate brownies, ever 😂😍xxx
Lauren Wilcock ahhhh can I have one 😋
Megsy Recovery of course! It’s 3 eggs, 300g caster sugar, 75g flour (although I generally do 60/65 so it’s nicer!), 40g cocoa powder, dark choc 150g and 175g butter. Then I normally cut up 3 rows of white choc into small chunks, freeze it and then fold into the mix just before baking. It’s amazing😍😍
I’m going through and re-watching all your videos in order. You are so helpful in so many ways. Love you analogy of a “functioning anorexic”. Definitely there right now.
It's so true what you said about what attracts you to other people. I NEVER cared about the looks of any of my friends. My AN is more a way to controll my anxiety and past trauma. The way I view my body wasn't the main part, it just happened as I lost more and more weight. It's so difficult to describe...
But anyway I think I'm kind of stuck in quasi recovery now and there was always something I wanted to focus more on than my health. Like "Oh, but the exams are hard enough without your brain screaming at you. Just wait until you have more time..." But you just inspired me to try harder and go grocery shopping today and buy something I really fancy! :D
I think for a lot of us as we recover, it is harder to shake quasi recovery than it is to get to the 'weight restored' point. I gave up ballet and dance as a teenager in my recover, partially to remove myself from the 'skinny' environment and partially to move the focus to general schoolwork rather than physical stuff. When i gave up the ED completely, I plateaued at BMI 24. More than before my ED. I think after being in starvation mode our body raises our set point so that we have some reserves in case of another famine (to our body there is no difference between an ED and a famine from outside causes). As years past and no famine reappeared (I was lucky and never relapsed), I think our body is confident in the food supply and your set point can lower. Mine dropped again and I didn't change anything on purpose.
If you are recovering, it is not fun, but maybe you might be the same as me and need to accept being a higher weight for some time after recovery. By some time, I mean years not months, as your body compensates for the starvation we put it through. With time, i think most will bounce back. i'm not a professional of any sort but this was my experience. it is worth it to not be in a quasi recovered state, I promise, even if I wasn't the happiest with my weight during those years.
Allybeetulk I’m so proud of you. I don’t even know you. I hope you thank yourself every day for having the guts to let your body be & to stop interfering & to give it time to level out itself. Even if it’s not the exact place you want it to be. Is it worth sacrificing all our life to hold our weight below where it’s naturally meant to be? Well done in your recovery 💛
This was exactly what I needed to hear! It helped me realize that this is not how I want the rest of my life to be. Thank you so much for making these videos.
You videos are incredible. You put words to things that I have never been able to articulate. Thank you so much and your logic is so helpful for me because i thrive off of that advice and your videos are honestly so helpful! Thank you x100000000 :)
Thank you for another great video! Even though I'm almost following my meal plan 100 % every day, I still struggle with a lot of ED thoughts and I'm really dependent on these few items of food or food brands, so I still have a lot to work on in recovery. For me something weird that has also made it hard to embrace recovery is missing inpatient, however strange that must sound. I don't know, I just felt really safe there, there was always a nurse to talk to if I needed. I'm also really obsessed with the fact that I was only there for 5 weeks, which is much shorter than other people, so I really need to go there again and stay for a longer period of time to really get the help I need. I know a lot of this has to do with my other mental health problems, especially I guess borderline personality disorder, which they tried to diagnose me with while in IP, but couldn't since I didn't fit all the diagnostic criteria, even though I fit most. So for some reason I'm really stuck in this place where I want to go back to IP, which really isn't helpful when it comes to recovery.
I haven't written letters to my future self, but thinking about where I want to be in 5 years or so really helps me! I'm 25 right now, and am still working on my bachelor's degree, so I'm having some sort of age crisis where I feel like I'm so behind everyone else and need to catch up. I'm trying to take this age crisis anxiety and make it into something more positive that helps me fight my ED and work towards getting my degree.
Cessie do the 1, 3, 5 years time exercise hun. Sounds like you’re very stuck in how ill you are & how ill you’ve been & all these thoughts which your ED floods you with (not your fault)... but times not standing still. Your life is still ticking past & other people are moving on with theirs. When you look back on your life will you be glad about what you weighed & how many weeks IP you had!? Or will you be gutted that you spent the one life toy get obsessing over numbers & your body & illness? It helped me a LOT to step back & get that perspective on what I was doing with my life & what was actually important to me. Hope that helps 😘😘😘
Thank you for your videos, you are just so honest about how hard this all is. I'm watching all these videos of recovered people who seem to know all the answers and make it seem simple, which makes me feel shit for not being able to recover, you are such a role model I can relate to. I thought I was recovered for years because I ate what I wanted and didn't care about my body (also not a healthy lifestyle) but actually I still had rules and fear foods. Now I'm back in full blown anorexia/orthorexia again, things went downhill so fast probably because I was actually never fully recovered. I am struggling to think myself into wanting to recover, wish I could find a therapist like yours she sounds great. I've been in therapy for years for depression and nobody has ever been helpful. Anyway I'm rambling sorry, just to say you seem so nice and genuine and I'm glad I found your channel, you make it seem a little more possible, thank you for sharing something so difficult with us x
lilywithkick awwww, yeh it’s good to be realistic. It’s not easy but it is possible. I had CBTE, if you could find some one who practices that 😘
Thank you for this words! So true!😘👍🏼
I remember me "enjoying a trip" with friends, the situations like sight seeing - the other concern of the buildings, paintings, things around and I was still percieving it only half way (if so..) and my thoughts were still flying out to "when will we have the snack? diner?" .."what are we going to have and when"?...."how much sugar could be there in that icecream which I did not like it at all - I should have the other it would be better and not so sweet....bla bla"....terrible, shit...and I was always pretending to be fine. And also I often felt so tired, but I kicked up myself with another coffee or zero cola...hmm. I was hurtin myself constantly
Kenya wow, that makes me exhausted just reading that, never mind loving it! So sad how we stay trapped in this tricking ourselves that we’re ok & functioning 🙈
thanks, well, I hope I am on the right way now, I have the same opinion on the proces of healing and I want to let the old habbits and circles behind me. Anyway, I think that many people today do have PPP in a sort of way. I can often see eliminating this and that from diet (with no reason in fact..) or obsessing with going to the gym, counting macross etc. Those people only do not consider themselves sick as they are in a good shape or healthy weight. Here we have a big advantege, we already know, that this is not normall, it is limitting. O do not want to be limited e.g. I am at concert..feel hungry, they only have hot dog or a burger there - ok it is not an example of clean eating but shit who cares? I like it, I am hungry I have it! and without "gulity pleasure" only with pleasure :-D
Hey Megsy, I love this video and what i find most interesting is actually that those behaviours and thought you describe as part of quasi recovery, are really quite common and perfectly acceptable for non-disordered people in our society. I guess that was my excuse to stay in quasi for so long! Cause everybody around me was telling the same things I would hear in my mind. Just, for me they were distructive!!
Valeria Di Gaetano yeh it’s weird how much disordered eating there is in society, but I kind of think for me that is just totally off the table. I can never dabble in any of that because of my history
Megsy Recovery Same for me right now! It’s too importante to be aware of the effect that things that may be normal for others have on us (and this is also true for life in general) and really take responsability for our own happiness. Thank you!! 😘
Your psychologist is lucky to have you and vice versa. She's VERY GOOD. Cheers Megsie!
Bins Q she’s an angel!!!!
Thank you for for videos. You are so relatable. It’s beautiful watching your progress. Especially love all the nuggets of info from your psychologist. It really is wonderfully helpful ❤️. Thank you for taking the time to help so many.
Rochelle Chism she’s an absolute angel 💛
This is SOOOO motivating!!!
Incredibly helpful video as always chick, thanks! PS your HAIR!!!!!! I cannot believe how long its gotten, and so shiny!Xx
alyshalauren aww thanks pal. & thanks food haha 💁♀️
My BMI before my eating disorder was 21, when I was barely exercising and eating way too much shit. My ED feels happy knowing that I could be lower naturally, so even though I’m not even within a healthy BMI range, I still restrict to try and lose weight for different events, and suppress my weight to my ED’s standards. I want to completely recover and I’m aware that it’ll have to happen someday, but feeling the weight gain is so uncomfortable and it always causes a relapse, especially because my ED was mainly triggered by the looks of those around me
Urghh I was stuck in quasi for 6 years - and actually thought that was as good as it gets! Yes its a lot better than full blown anorexia or bulimia, but its no way to live. Surviving not thriving. Life is for living - YES! xx
Thank you Meg!!!☀️💗
THIS. thank you for this. Your psychologist sounds amazing. I sometimes I feel like I get more helpful tricks/tools from your videos that. I get from my appointments here... Lol
Shelley C she’s an absolute hero. I’m very lucky, glad I can share it 💛
Thank you for this Megs! Kicked me up the arse to change my breakfast around this morning and stop living in that Groundhog Day. I had different food, sat in a different place (my bed!!) and much earlier than usual too because why put off eating? Thank you!! I wondered, did you ever find your wedding rings or get an equally gorgeous replacement? I never see them in your vids!
Loren G good for you!!!! Replacing them 😋
Yasssss you have to show us them!!
ed made me feel productive bc i didnt have to do much to achieve something,it gave me some kind of purpose in life
Thank you for this video!
Loved this video, thank you for once again sharing your wisdom 💛 it feels very relevant for me right now. Could I ask, how do you remind yourself of these things everyday your psychologist and yourself work on? I feel I make these revelations but then forget them in the moment and was wondering if you had any advice on this? Love to you xxx
Haych Chad I try to keep really effective & easy to remember things to hand. Opposite actions. Bren, babies, bones. Break the cycle. What life do I want to be? Who do I want to be? Rather than try to challenge & rationalise every thought, I try to use effective things that work in the minute. Also making lists of the pros of recovery & the shit things about being ill to keep me connected to what I need to do. That helped 😘
I don't know how to get out of my relapse... I feel miserable but I still feel like I don't want to get out of that. It feels kind if normal ..like ...my life..
I am far enough into recovery that I know I don’t want to go back to bad habits, but I’m struggling with hating how I look in photos and in the mirror. Anyway. Thanks for sharing everything-it does help. 🙃
Ellen Mason I found I got more comfortable with time in my new body. But I don’t really spend long looking in the mirror. Some photos I hate but then I try to remind myself the life I’m able to live in this body. Is it worth throwing my whole life away again to look a bit smaller in photo? Not really
Megsy Recovery Thanks. It’s actually comforting to know that it can still be hard to like the way your current body looks. And you are so very right about being able to live in this new body.
Hey, I watched another video that resonates a lot with your topic here and it might help you understand the problem better: Kayla Rose Kotecki: Why you had more energy when restricting/dieting and less energy (lethargic) in recovery. She has her own book and the website @t
Does anyone have any advice on how to handle family based treatment where your parents and family have complete control over what I eat? I just got stuck with this treatment and I am having massive anxiety over losing my control
I loveeeee you so so soooomuch! Thank you for YOU 🙏! Do you ever experienced extreme hunger? Or do you still experience it? Do you have tips for it how you responded to it? Xxxx
Quilla Mulder I don’t so much now but I did a video on it when I did get it badly 😘
my goodness i needed this thank u sm
Not AT ALL related, but how do you find new reads?! You always have the most interesting looking book choices.
Rachael Erin I love reading!! & a lot comes through recommendations from other people. Also I have a kindle & just go through the top charts there, or the Richard & Judy book club, but I find them really hit & miss. They’re either amazing or rubbish 😂
Can I ask... you talk about responding g to extreme hunger before as well as following a meal plan. Did you respond within the meal plan or honour cravings or were they 2 separate parts of recovery at different times? If I struggle will guilt when I overeat am I better trying to follow a meal plan with a dietician rather than following through when extreme hunger hits? I’m worried about getting stuck in a binge purge cycle?
totally agree, I experienced the same
Definitely relate to being a functioning anorexic...
what about smaller bodies is it possible/normal that your weight will plaeteu in a bit under bmi or just in the smallest amount of bmi or having lesser fat percentage?is it still healthy or should you try to increase still?
Ps. Well fucking done on getting that wrap!
I looked up your book, sound good, did you enjoy? Can you recomend it? Sounds funny according to reviews on goodreaders etc
Yeh so funny, well worth a read!
I left the hospital in quasy recovery (physically recovered but not mentally) and I relapsed. Now in the worst... I am trying to eat so much more but my big deal is also not exercise or compulsory movement. How do you deal with that? Do you do some kind or exercise? Did you do? Thank you so much!
M F no, thankfully I’ve never really had that compulsion. I think it’s the same as food though, in the sense of opposite actions, don’t act on the thoughts & temptations or you’ll stay trapped it them. Lots of love 😘
love this video megsy thank you 🙏🏽. you said the being skinny & fitting smaller clothes are short-term happiness. but what if you've always wanted to look better than others, or that being a fashionable person & were always known for looking great... it makes me happy however shallow it is, but I don't think it's a short-term one. What can I do to accept that I might still look good in a bigger body? Lots of love 💕
It's not worth the stress of an eating disorder! No one is going to remember you just because your thin! They will remember you for the experiences together. And you need to be mentally recovered to have good experiences like that!
you're so right. I totally get that. but also want to look my best like most normal people. letting yourself go is not healthy, not is having an ED. I'm trying to train my brain to have different values but I've finding weighting over a certain point very scary and fundamentally against my values. Thank you for your respond. @@orangepulp392
I’d probably just try & question is it genuine happiness... is it what you will look back on aged 80 & feel happy about? & then 2nd question, is it worth sacrificing your whole life to achieve?... so by that I mean Is it worth missing out on relationships & eating out? Is it worth thinking about food for every waking second? Is it worth fighting your body & denying it food? If the answer to all of those is yes then I can’t really help I’m afraid. Sometimes it takes time to realise how awful an existence having an ED is. & sometimes you need to lose enough of your life to it to realise it’s not the best use of the one life we get
pink custard 💛
Thank you so much for replying. the answer to all those questions is NO. I've lost half my life to eat, and I can't imagine living like that for another 15 yrs. I'll right these questions down and remind myself of the hell this ED has made me live. so proud of your recovery & always motivates me to do what you do when faced with challenges. lots of love 💜@@megsyrecovery191
Is your weight still a battle mentally? Eat when others aren't 💪😎x
Emily bell a bit, but much less so
I feel like I am basically recovered, but the thoughts are still always there. I could be out with friends and having fun but...the guilt and the anxiety hang around.
Maureen Seel is that recovered though? I don’t know 🤷♀️ are they getting less with time? I think that’s what’s happening to me, they still come but a lot less frequently