When You Have To Parent Your Ex AND Your Kids: A Conversation With A Single Mom
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- Опубликовано: 24 мар 2024
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Chelsea speaks with writer Jessica Blankenship about getting pregnant at 25, moving to NYC, and raising a kid as a single mom.
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The fact that she pays for a deadbeat man to visit his own son is so painful to hear, man.
I thought Chelsea's head was going to blow when she said she gave her child's father a credit card to buy his ticket to visit his own child! 😅
Well, we know his b*** weren't traveling with him if that's how he visits his kid.
OK, I dont post comments here but am listening to this at work and almost in tears listening to her talking about not bad-talking her son's father. My mother was amazing that way, she let me figure out my dad myself (in the 70s and unmarried, my mom got NO child support. He just showed up for graduations and occasional birthdays when he was dating/married to someone who thought actually being present was important for a father. I had his number by high school). I remember (I'm solidly gen X) having a college friend (who had two parents, one was a college professor) say "I always think of you and your mom being Rory and Lorelai Gilmore" and I almost jumped down her throat. UMMM Gilmore Girls IS NOT REALITY. My mom was a physical therapist (lucky in that, better paid than many jobs) and I had no grandparents to deus ex machina come and let me go to Yale. I started working at 14 cleaning houses over the summer for books for HIGH SCHOOL, mom and I NEVER went out to dinner or take out- we ate a LOT of ramen and hotdogs and beans, mom never has owned a home and was able to buy her first new car when I was 22, AND she didnt get to retire until she was 71 (and again, privilege and having a pension not just a 401k, RIP to that in healthcare).Just THANK YOU Chelsea for presenting this. This (and much worse) is the reality of single parenting...
Thank you for realizing that your ex promised a pie in the sky about leaving Atlanta - & for being true to what you wanted, instead of becoming comfortable in misery & resentment. Kids recognize that misery.
Seriously, that was a brave move to make. She’s got some grit.
@10:40 you can tell he promised her that he’s be willing to go to NYC and support her career and such to convince her to keep the baby, not to actually show up and be a good partner and dad, but to clip her wings and slow her down. It’s no surprise he switched and then forced her to have to pursue her career on her own. I bet he was hoping a kid would kill her prospects and keep her stagnant. He totally meant to derail her career and goals. Glad she didn’t let that happen.
He baby trapped her. Lucky she escaped.
I can attest that you can avoid becoming more conservative when you have more money. My husband and I are boomers and we struggled financially raising our children while living in a very expensive part of the country. But when my salary picked up substantially and we could finally breathe, I think we became more liberal and more compassionate. We are retired now, and have so far resisted watching faux news and have embraced diversity.
I’m so grateful I never got pregnant by my exes 😮💨 only one of them has had the decency to leave me alone, the rest still like to pop up every once in a while - always from Google Voice numbers or after creating new email addresses. I can’t imagine how much more entitled to my energy they would feel if we had any shared attachments like a child.
Yes! I feel the same and have that, too! So many of us must!
Dude how disrespectful they do that to me too why are they like that? So ridiculous they think they’re entitled to our energy cuz they keep us in their tiny empty brains
@@chelseashurmantine8153I think you hit the nail on the head - it’s a lack of respect issue!
This is ALWAYS my thought and this is also what makes me scared about who I have a child with (even now) …because I don’t want to regret it. 😩 Even going to a baby bank sounds like a much better option to me because I DO NOT want a dude tied to me and stressing me out 😅😅😅
Ewww
Most people dont know what its like to survive those early baby years, the turbulent toddler and early school age years, the hormonal tween and teen years, etc. And if you get a special needs kid, may God be with you!
Agree. Doing it on your own is so much harder. My ex gets to be the 'fun dad' with no responsibilities, while I do everything else. He just wanted the status of being a dad without doing the work.
Thank you for sitting down and discussing your experiences with relationships, parenting, child rearing, and finances. Your story is so interesting and you are such a strong person! Your child is so lucky to have such a firm and decisive parent guiding them through life. You went through a lot and you were able to tell your story in such a positive light.
The guest came across as having a good head on her shoulders; mature and pragmatic. The choice she made to not sit in resentment but to forgive and love her son’s father well, in a way that would bless her kid, was an example. I loved to hear that she paid back her landlord and the preschool: I bet she could’ve gotten out of that, but it was important to her to settle her debts. Thank u!
Another reason why I'd never be able to parent: I'd sure as fuck tell my kid everything their deadbeat dad didnt do. I dont have the patience like a lot of good parents. Props to the guest of this week.
It's a skill and takes practice. Being a parent forces you to practice patience and to go with the flow.
Honestly same, but because I would want them to know the truth. Downplaying it just teaches them that dad not showing up for them is acceptable. I wouldn’t say “ur deadbeat dad bailed again lul”. I would tell them that he might make promises that he won’t keep and warn them to guard their hearts. And make sure they know it’s a him problem, not a them problem.
Honestly while you might feel justified, it’s harmful to tear down their parents. Kids don’t understand adult problems so thrusting adult issues onto them is kinda cruel. As a mom with. Deadbeat dad it’s pretty hard honestly. I don’t lie to my kid but I don’t tell her all the dirt details. She doesn’t deserve that burdon. Kids always figure out who their parents are but a good parent will shield their kid from their deadbeats without dumping their adult issues on them in the process
This is why women want to be childfree these days. ❤🎉🥰✨ I own my car and my home. I don't want to caretake for anyone else. I love how peaceful and clean my house is. I love having money for retirement, electronics, video games, and vacations. Being single and childfree is the way to be. Oprah was on to something. 🤔🤭
💯 fathers don't step up the majority of the time. And the pregnancy itself...no thank you. I'll take doing what I want , when I want any day of the week.
To each their own. I'm a single mom - my daughter wasn't a planned pregnancy but I couldn't imagine life any other way. I own my car and I'm set up for retirement, still living a full life in the meantime. We have an upcoming week-long vacation, staying club level at the resort and traveling first class on the way home 🙂
Oprah was single ?
@@soapaddict09Nope, the fathers do not step up, neither do the husbands. So even in childfree households of hetero couples, women still do the lionness's share of emotional labor, domestic labor, and financial planning. At that point, I may as well be free to do what I want as a single woman, since I gotta do it all anyway. Freedom is priceless. Time is precious. Staying stuck in a burdensome relationship is a very bad deal for women, especially those who successfully applied all these personal finance strategies and can afford to live alone. I get that living alone isn't possible for all women, but most women would be better off with a productive, pleasant, agreeable woman roomate rather than a burdensome 'relationship' with a husband/father that also behaves like a roommate but is instead the lazy, no-good type of roommate. It's all about choices and making the best choices we have available.
@leeche87 if I remember correctly, technically, yes. She and her partner were never married. I don't think they are to this day. You can be be in a LTR and not be married.
I love the conversation around parents making weird decisions post pandemic. It’s something that I often think about. I had my first child in 2020 and it’s a different time post pandemic to have kids. For example, Previously I had considered the idea of homeschooling and with all of the school shootings recently, I am all in on homeschooling our kids now. I am pro vaccines and my kids are vaccinated, but I have found out over time that even educated friends of mine are anti vaccines. It’s baffling that even well educated people that should understand the importance of them are against them based on fear.
I downloaded the astrology app and it’s giving me some really good insight into me as a parent and my kids as individuals too!
Hi Chelsea. I am new to the. I really like the topics. When I became a single mom from divorce, I believe I received a total of $2,000. He couldn't keep a job. Luckily I was able to move in with my sister and my mom, helped for a couple of years until I was on my shaky feet.
I went DEEP into the comments and laughed a lot on the abortion and astrology whining, I love that she already was committed to brush it all off, I feel like I want to be your friend already. Thank you for sharing your journey, it gives me hope.
Seriously, there are a lot of whiners in here. I’m a little disturbed. I mean like, duh! She’s made interesting life decisions. That’s why she’s here talking about them. She’s not telling anyone else what they should be doing.
Hearing someone genuinely refer to having a child at 24 as “early in life” really just reminded me that growing up in a small town is weird
Hmm I disagree because it sounds weird hearing 25 considered as early. That is a full adult who can even rent cars 😄
TBF, For the majority of history and even in many places today, humans have had kids around that age and even younger. Though Imo waiting til your past that age is better so you can mature and have more life experiences before settling down.
I thought she was going to say 20 or 21 not 25.
I'm 36 and still feel like a teenager! I literally feel like being 36 and pregnant is being a teen mom 🤣
i’ve lived in big cities my whole life and don’t know anyone who has kids before 30 currently haha
I’m side eyeing an astrology app. 😒
I was married to my ex 10 years before we had our son. He turned into Hyde after he was born. But mostly he resented me for caring so much for our newborn son. I said boy bye.
It’s been 5 years and I’m loving my life as a stable single mom of one. My saving grace is that I never wanted to have kids while unestablished financially, even while married. So when we split I was making great money and I still do. And I knew one was enough for me. We live well.
I agree that I’ve battled resentment after growing up poor and living with and going to school with people who never have been. I grew out of it and then it came back lol. It comes back when I’m broke again.
I feel the need to say that as someone who was raised by her father because my mother peaced out to move across the country when I was 7, while thats the minority, we don't need to be setting the expectation that men will be deadbeat dads. Thats just giving them an archetype to fall into and we can expect more and better by sharing stories of men who do shoulder the majority of child raising responsibilities!
Thank you for not weaponizing your son vs. his father. That was great, responsible, & kind of you.
Here in the first 5 mins and commenting to give this channel the attention it deserves! Looking forward to another episode of useful insights!
Great conversation. I identified with so much of it. Parenting is beautiful but hard. You can only put so much energy into being mad, you just go on. And you don’t have to give up your dreams for what you want to do in life for your child but doing it all at once is difficult.
We need a moderator in these comments tho it’s getting nasty down here.
Currently reading Doppelgänger!!
47:23 it’s funny cause I remember Chelsea’s video of her saying that 😂😂
I absolutely love this channel and the content you all bring! It’s always so interesting how you find these important topics and make it an open transparent conversation. That’s such a valuable thing to bring the world.
Another thing I value is how women centered some of these stories are. It tells our modern struggle as women, while allowing women to learn and be empowered by the examples being set.
Thank you to the Financial Diets team for being entertaining and VALUABLE content consistently.😊
Downloaded! 🎉
Your hair looks extremely good Chelsea!!!!
If this astrology app is what I think it is... isn't it kind of dangerous?
The app tells you who your child is based on their horoscope? Man... that's a little scary. Isn't your job as parent to get to know who your child is, and how best to help them? Not have an astrology app dictate your parenting?
Just a bizarre product.
Ho boy am I glad that I am child free. This podcast is scarier than any spooky movie I've ever seen.
Being baby trapped by a manchild would ultimately see the child's grandparents with custody because the baby trapper would be dead and I'd be in prison.
This lady has the patience of a saint, way too much patience and grace.
I dont want the stress of a good paying job, but i have no choice as a single parent. Financial support that comes from a relationship is an important aspect to be aware of.
Wow he baby trapped her!!! Thankfully she pushed herself to escape such a terrible situation.
27:03 partially why i dont want children in my life. I am a very logical and premeditated person i need every aspect of my life to be planned ahead, otherwise my brain experience severe dysfunction. i understand that the state of mind my of a parent is a complete different experience of life. That emotional ( not logical) mind operation truly scares me.
Yes! Did you know your brain expands when you become a parent? The emotional part activates. It's not a bad thing, just different. I noticed it the most when I had to go back to work - stuff I knew I already knew didn't come to me as easily as it used to.
I love Reba!
When I was growing up, my mother prioritized rent, energy and food above all else. I often went without medical care, I was lucky enough that secondhand clothes were prevalent so I didn't suffer too much for clothing. I think it's interesting to hear about how other parents prioritize that. My mother prioritized guaranteed security against homelessness over hiding our struggle from me. (Both are valid, I think)
I don’t think you should move to a city you can’t afford. Going into debt for the basic necessities is unwise, in my opinion.
Generally I agree, but there are factors there you might not have a choice. Ex: that's where your support system is, you can't afford where you are either, your career field is only located in places you can't afford until you're established in that field, etc
@@bradiedean7466She was like 24-26. She didn’t have to go to NYC. She chose the lifestyle over giving her son and mom and dad. How selfish!!
@@FriendsOfVeronica419 Not really. She said they both agreed to move together. He went back on his word :/
If people didn’t move to cities they couldn’t afford, our creative industries would be entirely ruled by nepotism (much more than they already are). Most people are pretty broke in their 20s, and young people have the time to establish themselves before your cost of living becomes higher. Think of how much art we’d miss out on if young broke creatives never moved to NYC or LA. Now with a kid, yeah that’s crazy risky. I’m glad she made it work for her! She had that extra motivation of her baby :)
How many people who start their own businesses struggle at the start? Sometimes we put ourselves through a lot to work towards getting where we want to go.
I applaud the app development, that’s a cool project and accomplishment. It’s not my cup of tea, but she has an app whereas most (me included) don’t! So honestly that’s all that matters lol. It sounds like a great way for people to conceptualize important stuff and have an outlet to relate and find ways to navigate problems. So that’s always a great thing in my opinion. I enjoyed the video!
I’m an Aries Leo Leo with a Gemini Leo Leo baby so I knew I vibed with her 😂
I just want to check out this app seriously 🤷🏾♀️
Was really interesting until the bs astrology stuff.
❤
Great episode.
I feel so much for this woman who was talked out of a termination of pregnancy by false promises from a deadbeat dad.
She literally pays for him to visit and he still doesnt visit.
Ladies: never feel bad about having a termination of pregnancy if it frees you from below bare minimum low effort men.
An astrology app for parents? Girl, bye.
Let her dream!
How is it any less viable than costar?
😂😂😂😂
Yeah like how does it make money? Selling our data?
"I'm launching Crystals 4 Canines, we're really excited to help your dogs' vibes"
i mean if myths were already introduced just say he joined the navy and his boat sank :( oh nooo :( tragic :(
If people with money will pay for an astrology app for parents, it's not dumb.
The fact that you can find dumb people willing to pay for a lot of dumb things doesn’t make this pursuit any less dumb. A trivial and useless app, just like all the other astrology crap out there.
I love this topic I didn’t like the interview
Yea exactly unless we are married
As the child of someone who's mom got married way too young and had me with the wrong man, ladies I implore you to CHOOSE BETTER. No wedding, no womb. This is the product of poor foresight and planning. And children like me end up paying the price.
no wedding no womb? what makes you think marriage will make all the difference?
Weddings do not help. My mom is still married to my dad and we both fucking hate him and cringe at his presence
We place so much responsibility on the woman but not the man who skated out on raising his child. We tell women to choose better but don’t tell men to BE BETTER.
“The 400 dollars was inconsistent” looking like a damn fool 🤦🏼♀️
How was her rent 3000 all the way back then, even in ny
probably due to location
I am foster mother to my divorced sister sehrish son Syed fareed shah
Once this woman said she was a Sagittarius it all made sense LMFAOOOOOO. I have nothing to say, do what you need to do sis.
thee most sagittarius thing to do 😭
"Early on" in life? At 24? 😂 Sorry, but no...
Here come all the comments of people being upset that she didn’t break down into tears talking about her previous abortion….
I love astrology so I appreciated Chelsea's comment at the end! ❤
Can't we all just get along!
Yeah, astrology the same as religion. Can’t beat stupid.
If a 20 yo male robbed your home and in the process killed your love one would you chalk it up to them being young and immature?
Rob take your ass to sleep and stop harassing this woman!!!! To be so against the content, yet still here. Admit it, you love this shit.
I’m not dissing her because I used to believe a lot of the same things but go boy hearing how cavalierly she takes about killing her first child almost knocked me off my feet. Then she went on to say she moved from one insanely expensive city to another insanely expensive city and didn’t marry baby’s daddy and didn’t go to court to secure that child support and didn’t move in with parents and omg so many alarming decisions. If I were this single mommas mama I’d have a constant anxiety stomach ache wondering what sort of nonsense she was getting into. Just get a real job baby daddy! You can follow your dreams when the kid hits sixteen 😅 88,000 ain’t bad though girl got that bag. 💼 so she must be an amazing writer.
Ellie, parenthood is hard. The problem is that we keep making excuses for people. As a result over time people are making worse and worse decisions bc there is no accountability. As a result the govt steps in. Unless you hold people accountable things will never get better. If you are going to have sex be mature and smart enough to use condoms/birth control. Several years ago before abortion was legal you didn’t have people having babies left and right unless they were married. Why bc they knew the consequences. Now people have multiple choices to prevent pregnancy and they are not mature enough to use them. They sb held accountable. Over time people will change their behavior bc of the consequences of their actions. That simple. Maturity!!!
People were having babies before marriage back then too and they were also having unsafe abortions (coat hanger), abandoning babies, or putting them up for adoption. Orphanages were abundant back in the day. Its important not to romanticise the past
they weren’t having abortions at the rate of 1,000,000 per yr and they weren’t doing late term abortions. Don’t go romanticizing the present. It is a moral disgrace.
What i dont understand is why did you have a child with a broke, unreliable guy and you being broke as well ? You knowingly set yourself up for failure and a painful life. You basically played yourself
She said she was heavily considering abortion and ultimately decided against it. She clearly considered this and chose as best she could.
@@DanielleFerreira-uk9ytstill doesnt change the fact she knowingly set herself up for failure
Partners can be real convincing about this stuff, not taking the level of commitment required seriously. She didn't play herself, he said he would support her and her child. When you have a child you are responsible for raising them and they are your priority, it is a full time job; sadly a lot of people can't accept that and would rather be selfish than to (temporarily) sacrifice their own interests (until the child is old enough to be in school and independent etc). A toddler cannot survive fully on their own; they need parents or caregivers to guide and support them.
It’s fine to “not break down in tears” when talking about abortion as another commenter put, but alluding to abortion as a form of birth control and then laughing about it is very weird energy.
I understood that she made three appointments dithering but went ahead with the pregnancy, even though she was 24, single and on food stamps. Somebody was going to judge her no matter what decision she made.
@@SusanaXpeace2ushe wasn’t on good stamps or single before she got pregnant. She was 24, with a boyfriend, was working full time and then when she decided to keep the pregnancy to term and delivered her baby she got on food stamps and maintained her relationship with the father until they decided to part ways and he paid child support and it doesn’t seem like she denied him access to their child. Just bc she has one abortion earlier in life doesn’t mean she was flippant about this decision.
Deal with it. It isn’t your abortion
@@chelseashurmantine8153that’s right it’s the babies
@@Rob-me8vp Cluster of cells
dang. i get 400 a month for twins, not a week for single child. That's the most spoiled child support ive ever heard of.
This is… a take, I suppose.
Sounds like it’s time to re-eval that support.
Could be a lower cost of living where you live
Saaame. When she said $400 / week I thought maybe she meant to say per month. I get 380 per month and have for the past 12 years (finally on a consistent basis once it started automatically coming out of his paycheck)
$400 per week would be freaking wild. I do feel like you should def get more for having two kids/twins though!!
@@briarpeterson6938your comment does not compute. CS is calculated based on both parents income, who covers healthcare, and who has most overnight custody. So if you have high earners, and the non custodial parent doesn’t have overnight custody, or course CS will be high. I have moderate CS that is over $1.5k/month for one child and that’s basically money I put away for savings for my child because both myself and my ex are high earners. I don’t need that money, hence why it goes to savings, but since my ex doesn’t pay for anything for our child during most of our child’s life, and makes more than 200k/ year, yeah he can pay 1.5k in support.
This is completely non-relatable and inaccurate 13:54 . 1) not true that most single moms come from a divorce situation 2) this woman is complaining that the kid’s dad has always given her $1200 a month?? Do you know how many single mothers have to fight years to get less than $300 a month? Also, she CHOSE to move to NYC. She talks as if she was going there for life-saving treatment and not because of her career aspirations. Technically, she left her baby’s father and then resented him.
First world problems.
When are people held accountable for their actions. Your answer is to have people abdicate their responsibilities and either remove the problem or give control to the state. Look at the society we are left with. Immature individuals who don’t leave their parents basements. You see it all over our society today. Your lack of morals and ethics is destroying the fabric of our society.
Has it ever occurred to you that people don’t live in their parent’s basement because they enjoy it so much or lack “morals”, but because housing and health care are crazy expensive and wages have been stagnant for a while? So many people are choosing not to have kids or even get an abortion for the very same reason.
has it ever occurred to you that these aren’t the only difficult economic times this country has experienced. In the 1980s mortgage rates were 13%. Ever try to buy a house at that rate? Have you ever been unable to buy gas bc of rationing? Have you looked to see the number of recessions that we have had since the Great Depression. Houses are also more expensive bc they are 2x the size they use to be and have significantly more amenities. People are overpaying for colleges and getting degrees which don’t provide a good ROI and then complain about their debt. People aren’t willing to move to less expensive regions of the country to have an opportunity for a job or a house to better establish themselves. They want everything now without putting in the time, effort and sacrifice. Try asking the older generations about the difficulties they experienced and I’m sure they will be able to tell you that they experienced many of the same problems.
@@Rob-me8vp regardless of the mortgage rates, house affordability is waaaay lower today than it was back then. And so many people do essential work but earn wages that are nothing but a joke. Education is less affordable. Health care is less affordable. The list goes on and on. And having a family simply isn’t the be all end all for everyone. Parenthood is hard. When you don’t really wanna do it, the children suffer. Being a child to an unwilling parent is absolutely crushing. In former times, the social pressure to have kids was suffocating, causing people to have kids even though they were absolutely useless or unhappy parents. Nonexistence, just like death, isn’t the worst that can happen to somebody.
really? Regardless of mortgage rates? Since when don’t mortgage rates have an effect on mortgage payments. Calculate the difference on a monthly payment at 13% vs 3%.
Ellie if houses are bigger you are paying for more house which makes it more expensive. Move into a 1940s house and you’ll understand why they are so much cheaper. Your answer is to have the govt step in and take control. Increase the minimum wage to a living wage. That’s going well in CA. Now people are losing their jobs. Unless the market determines the wage and cost then things become artificially inflated. For instance, why has college become more expensive, bc the govt provides loans that people cannot default on therefore schools can charge more without having to think about controlling prices. Now some schools are over $90,000 per yr. That is insane. You can go to a small private school and with scholarships it will cost $30,000 or less. If you pick a career with a good ROI then college is very doable. The govt has also stepped in with healthcare. Have you ever heard of govt mandates with healthcare. Before the ACA people could purchase HSAs and select plans with minimal benefits. Plans that were emergency plans which is what insurance use to be. The ACA made many of these plans illegal bc they didn’t provide enough of a benefit. Many people didn’t want these benefits bc based on their age group they weren’t at risk for certain diseases. Now with the ACA these plans could no longer be offered and people that previously had cheap insurance plans have to pay more for something they didn’t want. Furthermore, MDCR sets R&C. This artificially sets insurance rates and takes competition out of the marketplace. In fact, you go to your Drs office they can’t even tell you what something will cost. That’s bc of govt involvement and limitations the govt has placed on the insurance companies and medical providers. Please take an economics class.
@@Rob-me8vp Kudos for taking the time to write this out. But you have also greatly oversimplified things. What I clearly read here is government bad, markets good. I’m not at all saying that the government is innocent here, but I cannot take people seriously who can’t be more discerning. What about wage stagnation and (corporate) greed? Union busting? Insurance companies in and of themselves are a whole other can of worms. And then there is the fact that one particular party does everything in its power to thwart and twist any policy aimed at helping the poor. Frankly, I’m really sorry, but my time is worth more than meticulously answering every talking point of a text wall of a stranger on the internet. I reckon your answer as to why homeless is at a record high and young people can’t afford houses anymore is avocado toast and iPhones then? (apart from the government, of course). Have a good day, Sir, and a happy Easter.
Ugh. I find this lady annoying. She really put healthy food above paying rent and childcare. 🙄
Feeding your kid things that will keep them healthy is pretty foundational on Maslow's hierarchy of needs. You never know what you'd do in a situation until you're in their shoes. Let's not mom shame
Clever of her to figure out how to juggle it all to keep housing plus 3 meals a day. Lots of people can’t say the same. And healthy food doesn’t have to mean expensive.
wait are people still judging single moms like this?!? 😭 NATALIE ARE YOU BEING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW
I find people annoying who criticize mothers who are doing their best for no reason. As long as she kept a roof over their heads and her child cared for, what’s the problem? 🤷♀️
@@bradiedean7466not only that, but a single mom with a toddler needs to be looking after herself to be able to cope and healthy eating would be a part of it.
Where I'm from childcare is designed to get moms back into work and for me it worked out to be more affordable to return to work with childcare than it would be with no work and no paid childcare. The sad truth of capitalism.
The way this woman so cavalierly states that she had an abortion and when she got pregnant again and says I’ll just call up the doctor again and just deal with it is repulsive. It highlights her immaturity and why she has so many problems.
Mind your own business.
I agree. Disgusting.
Thats ... A Take. Apparently she did NOT have that 2nd abortion, and Just relating her First reaction to finding Out about her pregnancy? While also saying that she wasnt mentally prepared and didnt plan on a child? Man, chill 😅
This is REALITY in the U.S. If youre a woman, you have to look at your life and be honest anout whether having a baby is fair to the baby. Her ex is a man-child who tried to manipulate her after trapping her. She still prevailed somehow.
The way you cavalierly made this response is why she caverlierly said she got an abortion. She decided to keep one kid and was destitute for multiple years and yet you did not highlight that with your elitist response
WHAT A CONDESCENDING TITLE! "PARENT YOUR EX". WOMEN LOVE TO THINK THEY ARE BETTER THAN EVERYINE ELSE!
It’s condescending to force someone to take care of you like a parent when they aren’t your parent and yet?
Immaculate. The all caps shouting into the void. The taking a click bait title seriously. Iconic honestly.
If a hit dog hollar 😂😅
Amazing that he proves the video's point with this remark. An emotionally mature man wouldn't take something personally that he knew didn't apply to him.
@@2ctheoceanyes 😂😂😂😂
Sorry I see an empty hollow human who only sees success as career and financial. That’s not success in my eyes.
Fine. There are many ways to be successful in life. You do you. But realize that your way is your way, not the only way.
@@ElliBeeniewhen I do me it doesn’t involve killing another human!
@@Rob-me8vp you were talking about career success vs having a family. But suddenly it’s all about the abortion? Dude.
@@ElliBeenieputting your career success over the health and well being of your child is a problem. There clearly is overlap as you have to have a good job to support a family, but hey maybe you should wait to have a child before having a career in order. Which means use birth control and not get pregnant in the first place. If you abort a child in order to pursue career success that is morally reprehensible. Dude!
@@Rob-me8vp as I’ve said multiple times, not everyone is cut out to be a parent. And giving birth can completely interrupt someone’s entire life, lose someone one’s job, and can be extremely hard on the body, and possibly lead to death. Then there’s the risk of complications, developing post partum depression or autoimmune diseases and all that stuff on top of that. Nobody should be forced to go through that against their will.
As the child of a mother who was a foster child I’m glad abortion wasn’t a choice back then. My mother was a foster child who lived a wonderful life. Maybe people sb more accountable and perhaps we make it easier to adopt since there are more people waiting to adopt than there are abortions.
Your mother’s experience is not the reality of MOST situations. Abortion is not a bad word or choice. There is a living breathing person who becomes pregnant through multiple different ways. That person has thoughts, ideas, feelings and past experiences that all play into the decision of ending a pregnancy. Until a new person is born physically into the world breathing then it’s up to the conscious being to make an appropriate decision for them. I’m glad to hear your mother had a wonderful experience in her situation I would implore you to listen to an outside perspective.
Glad you opinion is just that, an opinion. I have has the same procedure that women who terminate their pregnancies get because I had a pregnancy that stopped progressing at 7 weeks and would not miscarry naturally.
I’m so glad I could have my procedure 10 years ago without someone giving their unimportant opinion about what I needed to do with my body to stay healthy and alive. I went on the have a healthy baby 3 years later. Glad I got my D&E so that I didn’t die. Otherwise my son won’t be alive either.
I'm the child of a father who was a foster child and I'm heartbroken abortion wasn't a choice back then. He's spent 7 decades making choices based on his belief his mother didn't want him.
I found his birth family. His birth mom and dad had three more children in rapid succession and their lives were hell because their mother was a shell of a human after surrendering her firstborn.
Not your life or your choice to make.
abortion is murder. One day you will realize it is wrong. You can’t make up for your own mistakes by killing a human being just bc it is in the womb.
She prevailed at the expense of her baby and her poor choices. Glad she wasn’t inconvenienced.
Man chill? A baby was killed bc she wasn’t mentally prepared. Absolutely selfish and irresponsible!
You're unhinged in these comments, man. Take a walk.
Have all the seats, Rob.
@@JKRBWgo back in your hole.
@@SiouxsieAngelI believe I grabbed the last one.
10 comments later: we got your point.
How do you know Rob isn’t short for Roberta? Is this a safe space?
That is unfortunately horrible. Almost as horrible as the killing of a baby. At least they had a chance.
And laughing and joking about it
Damn do you have a job? Why are you serial-commenting? Weird look
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