Im 45 and have suffered chronic pain, fatigue, and colitis, IBS for 20 years. I'm only just finding out that it is all from trauma. I have been with my partner 27 years and only recently came across the term "covert narcissist". I recognised her traits and why I have been a mess, but always blamed myself. I had a narcissist father and a mother who was an enabler. This has been a lot to process in the past 6 months, but I hope I can move forward. Knowledge is enabling.
Knowledge indeed sets you free in the sense that you can shape your own life instead of letting others do it for you. I'm so glad people are waking up from narcissistic abuse and finally get the tools to save themselves. Waking up indeed comes at a great cost of sorrow for all the years lost and missed life experiences but the cost they would have to pay to stay in an abusive relationship or stay influenced by their traumas is even bigger. It really doesn't matter if the abusers are diagnosable or what kind of psychological conditions they have. The important thing is, how do they make you feel? 😊Good luck on your healing journey. I wish the best for you.
Similar story, after 24 years he cleared out our joint bank accounts, ran away with no explanation. Completely broke throughout this Xmas period and no money for medications for my CPTSD and its awful symptoms fybromyalgia. Every single day without exception I have gained health, no pills, no pain just peace, which in turn brings a sense of safety, the rock of recovery. I read "The Body Keeps The Score" many years ago to help with my understanding of childhood abuse. In my humble opinion I do not agree with the idea of the body holding on to pain, its appears a good idea but in my experience it is the brain that keeps the score. Once I understood that I was re producing the trauma, that tiny bit of information, helped move me forward and seperate my thoughts. Horrible thought hey, that we are all doing it to ourselves? Good luck narc survivors, you really are not alone, warm regards.
BBC had an article saying something to the affect that the host of this channel was under scrutiny for spreading misinformation. Someone else please correct me if I’m wrong. Great interviews, keep it up.
Minute 12 - 13! Childhood trauma when you’re really young. It effects the cockroach center of the brain under the amigdila, the periqueductal grey area.It fires continuously causing one to feel constantly in danger and you don’t no why .This is different from anxiety and it has no trigger. I finally have a diagnosis, thank you
It also depends a lot on what you consider successful. Is that just somebody famous or very rich or at the top of the corporate ladder? I thought of myself as a failure because I hadn't achieved any of that. But I'm 70. I own my own home and have a modest income from savings and freelance work. I have two pets that I love and that love me and are happy. All this despite starting off as practically homeless at 14. Mother died, father remarried and allowed his new wife to abuse me - as did the entire family look on and blamed me. I studied for school exams under a streetlight. Got a bursary (which dad and his wife tried to hide from me). Went to university, battled through with no money, got a job, bought a house. Isn't the success of my life that I took the right path and ended up in a safe, loving little home, instead of prostitution and drug addiction, the road which most girls in that position invariably take? Isn't that an actual success? Though anonymous?
This book was recommended by my EMDR therapist. It was an amazing read, at times hard to read but so helpful. It helped me heal a history of chronic illness! Thanks for doing this interview!! Looking forward to hearing it all!
Yes he's correct, it depends per case per trauma many variables. After my oldest daughter was murdered, not only has it changed my life, but the world is different to me now. As far as "normal" life, never again. Yet, somedays I can focus and really thrive and make happy and successful moments, and other times it really debilitates me in situations that used to be no problem at all.
I've experienced that, too. Less now, but I always believed that some trigger has occurred in my day or even in a dream. Like waking up feeling off & not sure why. Debiltates-like stuck?
Perfect Timing. I am finishing up another audiobook, and used my credits to listen to the body keeps the score next. Definitely looking forward to listening to this interview
You talk about trauma being trapped in the body. I've had trauma since early childhood and became an overachiever, striving and overwork etc. Married a nice but weak man who turned out to be an alcoholic and bankrupted us, and my whole life been struggle, worry and carrying loads too heavy for me. I'm now a 75 year old widow living in pain because of bad arthritis. I've worked through it all, forgiveness etc and know my health issues are because my body has turned against itself, but how do I reverse it? Working through the past hasn't cured me and I need help as I'm miserable and crippled
Omg I really enjoyed this Thank you I can relate n understand the statement Often the most traumatised people are the happiest n the most successful My brother sees his past as traumatic I shared the same past n I’m extremely grateful n ℹ express my gratitude I’m happy n my brother has more material things but he’s unhappy n sick I’ve seen refugees from certain countries Some turn to violence n some are the happiest generous successful business owners
And shadow work releases the trauma that is trapped in your body. Integrating your subconscious into your consciousness allows you to revisit trauma without pain. Getting into the state of mind to perform shadow work is the trickier part.
@@billyrock8305 I do that too sometimes. But gosh, you seem to be as sour as a grape. Perhaps I'll give you the opposite advice to focus on something not so serious or productive once in a while, there is value to that too 😊
@ Quite the contrary. I find it fascinating that your observation, though illogical, serves to reveal more about your emotional state than about my own.
Find a trauma therapist. For a self-help approach, check out Anna Runkle's program (the crappy childhood fairy). ....and ignore the rude comments that some people post here.
Check out the documentary The Work. About the inside circle guys doing trauma work in prisons. All the guides are lifers in prison who turned their life around. Amazing documentary
DR.BERG Can we please have an insta pot yogurt recipe? I make regular yogurt with that and I'm not sure how to convert your recipe. Please and thank you.
In the ink blob test at 8:49 I see my evil snake mother in law with witch like hands, at 8:54 I see her coming to strangle me. My toxic mil used to always pinch me to the bone while smiling and making passive aggressive jokes. Now nc with her for a year and I still have anxiety
4 mins into this, i turned off. I respect the sincerity, but this os not about deep trauma! Unless you come up with an explanation of states in which it cannot ne put so radily into superficial words... Daying some ppl ' lack capacity to seek therapy ' & similar, simply demonstrates that his methods are not effective with deep trauma! Saying that men in military training make great leaps in grouos, has no meaning & is not applivable to deep trauma ! I van assure you most feeply yraumatised men do not benefit from ' training '... Bssically, i conclude its perhaps a fallacy to tefer to his cased as ' trauma ' ...i think he is in danger of minimising the suffering of profound & deep trauma ! Its almost an insult to those who vannot be helped....but, such are the times We live in !!!
this is both unscientific & unagentic. not everyone has trauma; it is an absurd notion to sell books + build audiences. It is especially dangerous because these charlatans mask themselves as being compassionate, how can you attack those trying to help ppl with trauma?
📺 Watch the full episode here
ruclips.net/video/Qx5J5nwDBTo/видео.html&ab_channel=TheDiaryOfACEO
❤❤👌👏
Im 45 and have suffered chronic pain, fatigue, and colitis, IBS for 20 years. I'm only just finding out that it is all from trauma. I have been with my partner 27 years and only recently came across the term "covert narcissist". I recognised her traits and why I have been a mess, but always blamed myself. I had a narcissist father and a mother who was an enabler.
This has been a lot to process in the past 6 months, but I hope I can move forward. Knowledge is enabling.
Knowledge indeed sets you free in the sense that you can shape your own life instead of letting others do it for you. I'm so glad people are waking up from narcissistic abuse and finally get the tools to save themselves. Waking up indeed comes at a great cost of sorrow for all the years lost and missed life experiences but the cost they would have to pay to stay in an abusive relationship or stay influenced by their traumas is even bigger. It really doesn't matter if the abusers are diagnosable or what kind of psychological conditions they have. The important thing is, how do they make you feel? 😊Good luck on your healing journey. I wish the best for you.
Similar story, after 24 years he cleared out our joint bank accounts, ran away with no explanation. Completely broke throughout this Xmas period and no money for medications for my CPTSD and its awful symptoms fybromyalgia. Every single day without exception I have gained health, no pills, no pain just peace, which in turn brings a sense of safety, the rock of recovery. I read "The Body Keeps The Score" many years ago to help with my understanding of childhood abuse. In my humble opinion I do not agree with the idea of the body holding on to pain, its appears a good idea but in my experience it is the brain that keeps the score. Once I understood that I was re producing the trauma, that tiny bit of information, helped move me forward and seperate my thoughts. Horrible thought hey, that we are all doing it to ourselves? Good luck narc survivors, you really are not alone, warm regards.
Thank you BBC for making me love this channel more now!
Can someone explain please?
@newid10 search: diary of ceo bbc
BBC had an article saying something to the affect that the host of this channel was under scrutiny for spreading misinformation.
Someone else please correct me if I’m wrong.
Great interviews, keep it up.
@ I thought that might be it and wondered if that is why those “additional context” pop ups have been inserted. Interesting.
I attended a Trauma conference that he was the key speaker - all day. Incredible man and healer
Minute 12 - 13! Childhood trauma when you’re really young. It effects the cockroach center of the brain under the amigdila, the periqueductal grey area.It fires continuously causing one to feel constantly in danger and you don’t no why .This is different from anxiety and it has no trigger. I finally have a diagnosis, thank you
💯
you mean the periaqueductal gray area?
@@vasimir3183 … thank you, I edited my comment with your help
It also depends a lot on what you consider successful. Is that just somebody famous or very rich or at the top of the corporate ladder? I thought of myself as a failure because I hadn't achieved any of that. But I'm 70. I own my own home and have a modest income from savings and freelance work. I have two pets that I love and that love me and are happy. All this despite starting off as practically homeless at 14. Mother died, father remarried and allowed his new wife to abuse me - as did the entire family look on and blamed me. I studied for school exams under a streetlight. Got a bursary (which dad and his wife tried to hide from me). Went to university, battled through with no money, got a job, bought a house.
Isn't the success of my life that I took the right path and ended up in a safe, loving little home, instead of prostitution and drug addiction, the road which most girls in that position invariably take? Isn't that an actual success? Though anonymous?
This book was recommended by my EMDR therapist. It was an amazing read, at times hard to read but so helpful. It helped me heal a history of chronic illness! Thanks for doing this interview!! Looking forward to hearing it all!
What's the name of the book? And the auther
@@floccywajesu6244The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk, the gentleman who is being interviewed here. ❤
The body keeps score by Bessel Vanderkolk
Thank you@@IndianaHannah
Yes he's correct, it depends per case per trauma many variables. After my oldest daughter was murdered, not only has it changed my life, but the world is different to me now. As far as "normal" life, never again. Yet, somedays I can focus and really thrive and make happy and successful moments, and other times it really debilitates me in situations that used to be no problem at all.
I've experienced that, too. Less now, but I always believed that some trigger has occurred in my day or even in a dream. Like waking up feeling off & not sure why.
Debiltates-like stuck?
What a terrible, terrible loss😢
Best book I've read in my entire life
I love Bessel and his work. I also love Stephen. You are hands down THE best interviewer on YT. ❤❤
Perfect Timing. I am finishing up another audiobook, and used my credits to listen to the body keeps the score next. Definitely looking forward to listening to this interview
This book is on my reading list. Thanks for the interview!
Thank you Bessel van der Kolk for helping!!❤🦁
Wilhelm Reich was the OG on body trauma. He treated the whole body for psychology not only the brain and language aspects.
Thanks! I will check him out.
You talk about trauma being trapped in the body. I've had trauma since early childhood and became an overachiever, striving and overwork etc. Married a nice but weak man who turned out to be an alcoholic and bankrupted us, and my whole life been struggle, worry and carrying loads too heavy for me. I'm now a 75 year old widow living in pain because of bad arthritis. I've worked through it all, forgiveness etc and know my health issues are because my body has turned against itself, but how do I reverse it? Working through the past hasn't cured me and I need help as I'm miserable and crippled
Hi, hope you are getting better . If you need someone to talk i,m willing to have a good talk with you. Take care
Omg I really enjoyed this
Thank you
I can relate n understand the statement
Often the most traumatised people are the happiest n the most successful
My brother sees his past as traumatic
I shared the same past n I’m extremely grateful n ℹ express my gratitude
I’m happy n my brother has more material things but he’s unhappy n sick
I’ve seen refugees from certain countries
Some turn to violence n some are the happiest generous successful business owners
I cannot wait to watch this. This book is brilliant
And shadow work releases the trauma that is trapped in your body.
Integrating your subconscious into your consciousness allows you to revisit trauma without pain.
Getting into the state of mind to perform shadow work is the trickier part.
Everyone should read this book💚💚
Thank you bbc for this. 😊
That is a horrible acronym 😂
@
Your comment is illogical and serves no constructive purpose. I suggest you focus on more productive dialogue.
@@billyrock8305 I do that too sometimes. But gosh, you seem to be as sour as a grape. Perhaps I'll give you the opposite advice to focus on something not so serious or productive once in a while, there is value to that too 😊
@
Quite the contrary. I find it fascinating that your observation, though illogical, serves to reveal more about your emotional state than about my own.
@@billyrock8305 gosh aren't you a combative one. What's with the personal insults? I think those is quite revealing of you as well 🤷🏼
Omg I loved that book!!
How does a person heal from trauma who experiences trauma multiple times, in multiple facets of life, over many years (kid and adult)?
Get over it
@rickyfitness252 get "thru it" & keep moving forward. That was then approach. Like he says the amydala is always firing. Recognize & move forward.
@@suezmac3803 do you feel better
PTSD happens and the therapy is EMDR and counseling. It works.
Find a trauma therapist. For a self-help approach, check out Anna Runkle's program (the crappy childhood fairy).
....and ignore the rude comments that some people post here.
Check out the documentary The Work. About the inside circle guys doing trauma work in prisons. All the guides are lifers in prison who turned their life around. Amazing documentary
DR.BERG Can we please have an insta pot yogurt recipe? I make regular yogurt with that and I'm not sure how to convert your recipe. Please and thank you.
When the mainstream media go after a podcaster, they must be doing something right.
Vipasana practice seems to share a combination of this and Zen.
Interesting stuff!! Would love ❤to speak with him myself.
In the ink blob test at 8:49 I see my evil snake mother in law with witch like hands, at 8:54 I see her coming to strangle me. My toxic mil used to always pinch me to the bone while smiling and making passive aggressive jokes. Now nc with her for a year and I still have anxiety
This is all well and good but how do I avoid this?
Yes, trauma definitely gets trapped in our DNA. The shortest distance to healing (outside of Jesus) is forgiveness including yourself.
You have no idea what you are talking about
I agree 💯! forgiveness is the key to happiness ‼️🙏🏼
Jesus ❤
that *may* be right for *some* people
but it can be a deadly advice for others
be very careful with that simplistic, blanket statement
100%
Dr. Robert Scaer: trauma is having the accelerator and brake on at the same time.
I've read the book
It’s a sign to save your hard earned money ❤😂😊
What do you guys see in the ink blood test? I see horns 👀
Hi ❤
❤❤👌👏
Some guests need subtitles, lol
Some commenters need to get to know the world of accents 😊
That's a very American thing to say
Put you tube subtitles on then and quit complaining
Trauma, stress, cortisol, rage and diabetes is what I'm saved from through the death of God in Christ Jesus of Nazareth 😅🤣😂
4 mins into this, i turned off. I respect the sincerity, but this os not about deep trauma! Unless you come up with an explanation of states in which it cannot ne put so radily into superficial words...
Daying some ppl ' lack capacity to seek therapy ' & similar, simply demonstrates that his methods are not effective with deep trauma!
Saying that men in military training make great leaps in grouos, has no meaning & is not applivable to deep trauma ! I van assure you most feeply yraumatised men do not benefit from ' training '...
Bssically, i conclude its perhaps a fallacy to tefer to his cased as ' trauma ' ...i think he is in danger of minimising the suffering of profound & deep trauma !
Its almost an insult to those who vannot be helped....but, such are the times We live in !!!
Tbis guy fetting matrix attacked rip
this is both unscientific & unagentic. not everyone has trauma; it is an absurd notion to sell books + build audiences. It is especially dangerous because these charlatans mask themselves as being compassionate, how can you attack those trying to help ppl with trauma?
I don’t think you are being attacked