THE GUILT OF LEAVING FAMILY BEHIND To Move Overseas.

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  • Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
  • There's no easy way to say it. Leaving family behind to move overseas is hard. It's heartbreaking.
    But that's not to say you shouldn't do it. Or that it's impossible to cope.
    In this week's show, we talk to Linda. Linda is my children's Grandmother. And my mum.
    Linda moved from the UK eleven years ago to live in the same country as her two daughters.
    But she left behind a son, four grandchildren, a sister, a brother and her aunt.
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Комментарии • 77

  • @rogerb4436
    @rogerb4436 3 года назад +13

    That was a terrific video, it was straight up, to the point, honest and real. Very good content and put in a realistic in your face look at relocation. Great job.

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад

      This means a lot to us Roger, thank you very much for your generous comment, so glad that you liked it! ☺️

  • @annadex4569
    @annadex4569 11 месяцев назад +2

    I'm going through this right now. I'm leaving Spain to move to the US, away from my parents who im extremely close with to live with my finance and i am also currently 29 weeks pregnant. I cry so much so listening to this has been nice. Thank you

  • @eileenhildreth8355
    @eileenhildreth8355 3 года назад +7

    Such a difference to when my parents and I came to nz in 61. No phone calls as they were super expensive, had to be pre booked and made from the main post office in Invercargill. My parents never saw or spoke to family again, until mum went in the 80s, decades after her parents had passed. Mum wrote airmail letters monthly, and photos once a year. I really didn't have a relationship with any extended family. However they came to make a new and better life which they did. Today's level of communication, and the speed of travel is a totally different experience.

    • @greekxstitcher5379
      @greekxstitcher5379 3 года назад

      And we all hear today how far people feel! You are so write things are soo much easier today! Hero’s is what that generation were and still are

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад +1

      Thanks for sharing this Eileen, it is hard to imagine what it must have been like to get on a ship knowing that you would probably never see those members of your family again. Thank you as always for watching and for sharing 🥰

  • @user-rb5wc5sf6b
    @user-rb5wc5sf6b 4 месяца назад +2

    So amazing woman, so uplifting the spirit!! I am new to new Zealand and have these thoughts all the time, whether I did it right or not, leaving my precious family, crying so much too... But this video really makes it better! Such a wise a positive woman!! All hugs going to your mum, Liz! I wish all the best for her 🥰😞

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  4 месяца назад

      You are so welcome. My mum is indeed why I am brave enough to show up every week on RUclips and produce content with my husband. She is a huge source of inspiration.
      Thank you for this lovely comment and we wish you every love and happiness in your new life in New Zealand 🇳🇿❤️ Liz and Linda xxx

  • @carladossantos1142
    @carladossantos1142 10 месяцев назад +2

    Seriously, this video just gave me some peace. About to move across the ocean, 42, feeling this heaviness and extreme guilt to leave...thank you so much

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  10 месяцев назад +1

      You are very, very welcome Carla. That means a lot to us. Good luck with your move and may your new adventure be happy and filled with love. Liz and Linda 😊

  • @rollyrolly7729
    @rollyrolly7729 3 года назад +6

    Like mother like daughter you two.

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад

      We are often told that we are alike - I hope so...she's my hero 🥰Thank you for watching! ☺️

  • @hedwig041
    @hedwig041 2 года назад +8

    I've watched this maybe 3 times. It's such a comfort that you can be away from family and it'll be ok.
    I'm Australian and live in the UK. I live with my British boyfriend and he's just the best. It means being away from my family though. I love my boyfriend, I love the UK, but it's hard.
    Probably not helped by the fact that as I'm writing this I'm about to go back to the UK after a month home! Just needed to put my thoughts somewhere.

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  2 года назад

      You are always welcome to put your thoughts here my friend. It's not easy but it'll be ok. Stay strong ❤️

  • @dial999forme
    @dial999forme 3 года назад +3

    Thank you so much for all your lovely comments! Xxxx Linda...Lizzie’s mum!!!

  • @DomingoDeSantaClara
    @DomingoDeSantaClara 3 года назад +5

    This reminded me of the air-mail letters we used to get from family in England,it was so expensive and you almost needed a microscope to read them,every bit of the paper was full with the tiniest writing to get the best value for money.

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад

      Yes! And the paper was so flimsy and blue, it was almost like blotting paper! Ahhh...how excited you got when you saw one of those envelopes pop through the door! 😁

  • @Pilipinainchile
    @Pilipinainchile Год назад +3

    Great videos,i ask myself why i leaved my country for my kids just give them a future that i can't give if I stay with them in Philippines..

  • @greekxstitcher5379
    @greekxstitcher5379 3 года назад +8

    You mum is stunning Liz! You look a like ! Bless ya !! Sooo lucky to be able to go back so often ! X Bell well and keep smiling ! Btw I love your curtain colours

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад

      Thank you so much ☺️ Mum was very nervous about being filmed so I know that she will be feeling super loved right now, thank you as always xx

  • @meg7088
    @meg7088 3 года назад +7

    Thanks for sharing your Mum🌷 this is my favourite interview, absolutely loved it👌🏽Mums are very special 💖 Hi Linda 🙋🏽‍♀️

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад +1

      So glad that you enjoyed it Meg, and thank you for being so kind enough to tell us 🥰 My mum will be so happy to know that it's your favourite! xx🥰

  • @susanhammond2724
    @susanhammond2724 3 года назад +4

    Great video topic. Nice to meet your Mum. . I have always thought how difficult it must be to immigrate so far away from your original home, leaving family behind. Very brave! My Grandmother was born in London and moved here with my Grandad (a Kiwi soldier) around 1920 when my mum was two. Although Nana did travel back once in 1961, my mum never got the chance to go back. My Dad's Grandfather and his brother came here from Roche Cornwall and further back in the family tree were from St Mewan. I have always wanted to visit England, but especially Cornwall.

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад +1

      Thanks for this comment, Susan! Oh, you must visit Cornwall if you can. Brian and I both grew up in Cornwall (Newquay) and it is a very special place. If you ever make plans to go, please message me and I'll give you a few inside places 🥰

    • @susanhammond2724
      @susanhammond2724 3 года назад

      @@ItsaDrama Thank you, will do. So nice of you to offer. Can't see it happening any time soon but maybe one day. Depending on finances and covid free travel 😁

  • @paulcalkin7960
    @paulcalkin7960 3 года назад +3

    Both of you have given me a kiwi living overseas have made me so happy

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад

      Thank you so much Paul, it makes us so glad to hear that 😊

  • @terrymccarthy3429
    @terrymccarthy3429 3 года назад +5

    Another great one Liz, hilarious but serious. Love your mum.

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад

      Thanks so much Terry, we really appreciate it, I'll be passing these lovely messages on to mum! 🥰

    • @terrymccarthy3429
      @terrymccarthy3429 3 года назад

      @@ItsaDrama You're welcome.

  • @Marshie8
    @Marshie8 Год назад +2

    This was exactly what I needed to hear from someone who’s lived it in full. Not much else has helped me as much. Thank you for the perspective❤

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  Год назад +1

      We are so glad to hear it Jacqueline, stay strong and thank you for your kind words. ❤️

  • @annaboivin9209
    @annaboivin9209 3 года назад +4

    I had my first daughter in Wellington. The rest of my family were in Auckland. Seems close but due to work and so on it may as well have been further away. I love how easy it is to keep in touch now. People lament the days before electronics and all that but the free calls around the world are fantastic.

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад +1

      This is so true Anna, and I love what you say about electronics (and I'm the worse with my kids?! 😳) if it wasn't for technology the world wouldn't have opened up to us like it has done! Thanks so much ☺️

  • @jasonpayneuk
    @jasonpayneuk 3 года назад +3

    Brilliant video! Bit of an emotional one, you do miss family so much - luckily (and unluckily) I don’t have any close family down there anymore - the nicest thing is to make the most of the calls and trips back and enjoy making memories

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад +1

      Thank you, Jason, yes, you are right...as much as I go on about technology running my teenagers lives I wouldn't be without it! 😁

    • @jasonpayneuk
      @jasonpayneuk 3 года назад

      @@ItsaDrama absolutely, that technology makes all the difference!

  • @renatamortazavi2450
    @renatamortazavi2450 9 месяцев назад +1

    Omgosh, she is such a beautiful lady. ❤ such a beautiful soul ❤God bless her.❤

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  9 месяцев назад

      Thank you, Renata. She certainly is ❤️

  • @victoriaa2281
    @victoriaa2281 3 года назад +4

    I've been lucky enough to visit New Zealand twice during the pandemic because I've needed new visas, which I can only get in Wellington anyway. From next year I should be okay to stay there to renew until I get something more permanent, but I must say I've really appreciated the time with my family, and even the empty planes and managed isolation have been quite nice!

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад

      Thanks for sharing this Victoria, it's so interesting to hear how other people are managing these times! Thank you 😊

  • @Martarini
    @Martarini 2 года назад +2

    Okay help me with this, I am 21. I want to move abroad to live with my boyfriend and his family in Brazil, we want to get married there and finally end the distance. My parents are very strict and traditional people, I have 3 other siblings so they won’t be alone. When they heard I bought a ticket to Brazil one way abs my whole plan of teaching English there and marrying my bf after a few weeks, they flipped. I get it is a big move but they’re bringing my aunts and uncles to tell me I can’t go. My parents are telling me I can’t go, my brothers are telling me I can’t go. Everyone is telling me I can’t go and my friends are the only ones who give me support. If I don’t go I know I will stay here an empty, hollow, shell of a person. Depressed, regretful, resentful. Towards my parents and myself that I couldn’t push myself through the pressure. My family was the kind to never support sleepovers and now their daughter was gonna move abroad. I get it it’s scary I have tried explaining to them but they say I have no choice no matter what I say!! They tell me everyday to give them my passport and cancel my ticket. Somebody help ke what to do??

    • @lllc1762
      @lllc1762 Год назад

      I’m sorry I read this a few months late to give you my point of view. Did you go to Brazil? What was your decision?

  • @jeremyhaywood8890
    @jeremyhaywood8890 Год назад +2

    Thanks for a great video, I’m about to do the same and am feeling guilty so this helps enormously

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  Год назад

      We are glad that it helps Jeremy, thank you and good luck with your move 😊

  • @amilton1015
    @amilton1015 3 года назад +4

    Linda = beauty...in Brazil.

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад +1

      🥰I will tell her this! thank you 😊

  • @richardcaldwell9160
    @richardcaldwell9160 3 месяца назад

    Hey Liz, your Mum is just so lovely (like mine) hehe

  • @marilynndavid622
    @marilynndavid622 3 года назад +1

    How lovely to meet your Mum.😊 Great video too. Xxx

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад

      Thank you Marilynn 🥰

  • @rayrayrayrayray79
    @rayrayrayrayray79 3 года назад +2

    This is such a fantastic video!! Im sorry that your mum couldn't get back to the UK to see your brother because of bloody cover. I hope everything is ok.

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад

      Thank you so much, yes everything is fine now. It has been so hard on many people living overseas and hopefully this little video has helped people to know that they are not alone 🥰Thank you again! x

  • @richardreweti8671
    @richardreweti8671 Год назад +1

    It's only a plane ride away we have family in the UK 🇬🇧 who travel to and from for weddings and funerals.

  • @lovaboi44
    @lovaboi44 3 года назад +6

    NZ is the best country in the world

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад

      Well we think so but then again we are a bit biased! Thanks for watching 🥰🇳🇿

  • @JamieBeavers
    @JamieBeavers 3 года назад +2

    Awesome video. When I first seen your mum I thought it could’ve been your sister!

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад +1

      Ahh...she'll love that compliment! Thank you Jamie! ☺️

    • @JamieBeavers
      @JamieBeavers 3 года назад

      @@ItsaDrama you’re very welcome.

  • @Keichen
    @Keichen Год назад +1

    I needed this beautiful conversation. I feel like I'm apart of the family now🤣 Also, LOVE LOVE LOVE yawls idiolect!

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  Год назад +1

      So glad that you enjoyed it! And you are welcome to be part of our family! 😊

  • @terresagrace3767
    @terresagrace3767 10 месяцев назад +1

    I so relate

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  10 месяцев назад

      Thank you Terresa, we hope it helped 😊

  • @robert3987
    @robert3987 3 года назад +4

    It's great you've made it to NZ. How easy was it to get work visas?

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад +2

      Mum's husband was offered a job at AUT so they came on a work to resident visa 😊Thanks for watching Peter!

  • @enough1494
    @enough1494 Год назад +1

    About algorithms. I needed to see and hear this video. My empty nest is ready to be sold. Packing, selling all, going to Asia

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  Год назад

      Glad it was helpful 😊 Good luck with your next adventure ❤️

  • @bridget8655
    @bridget8655 Год назад

    Thank you

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  Год назад

      You're welcome Bridget 😊

  • @juliewilliams3579
    @juliewilliams3579 3 года назад +3

    That's what we use to say about England same but different lol

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад

      That phrase is so useful hey?! 😆

  • @richardsingh5827
    @richardsingh5827 2 года назад +1

    I feel guilty about leaving people behind, and they continue the guilt trip

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  2 года назад +1

      Oh dear...I hope it gets easier Richard 😊

  • @Regz45channel
    @Regz45channel 3 года назад +1

    great vlog's new friend realistic topics with mon ang daughter

  • @paullcameron5006
    @paullcameron5006 3 года назад

    Myself and my sisters all moved away from NZ. Myself to Canada and my sisters to the UK. We deprived our parents of seeing their grandchildren on a regular basis. That's what I feel the most guilty about.

    • @ItsaDrama
      @ItsaDrama  3 года назад

      IYes...I hear you, Paull. Guilt is part of the package when you emigrate, isn't it? And in times like this when travel is impossible, it is extra hard...Sending you best wishes 😊

    • @patriciasanderson2171
      @patriciasanderson2171 2 года назад

      Same. Moved from uk to Australia and the guilt is trememdous. I'm heartbroken every time i hug my mum goodbye and she didn't get to see my daughter grow up. Sometimes wish i hadn't done it.