They didn't let me into Auckland, New Zealand!

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  • Опубликовано: 4 мар 2023
  • #funny #newzealand #auckland
    Merch 👉👉 linktr.ee/jimmyrees
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Комментарии • 274

  • @vogonpoetjellyfish
    @vogonpoetjellyfish Год назад +119

    As an Aucklander I find this video to be completely spot on. The accuracy is impeccable (and I say that with sincerity).

    • @AlasdairMcLellan
      @AlasdairMcLellan Год назад +2

      Umpiccable!

    • @TrOLLKiLLeRs1
      @TrOLLKiLLeRs1 Год назад +2

      Only a frigging Aucklander could spell impecca... impeach....impecale...spot on like that

    • @JustYourGuy1
      @JustYourGuy1 Год назад

      So your enjoying your incoming floods? 😂😂😂

  • @erwerwewerwer4575
    @erwerwewerwer4575 Год назад +39

    "The biggest surge of Aussie migrants that have made Auckland their home recently are called?" "501's"

    • @jamilaali7288
      @jamilaali7288 11 месяцев назад

      ​@@Islandwaterjet aussie kiwis that get deported when they go to jail

  • @nz_puddlehound1617
    @nz_puddlehound1617 Год назад +113

    The traffic cones is so accurate! I swear they breed.

    • @juliaforsyth8332
      @juliaforsyth8332 Год назад +8

      Down south the keas shift them!

    • @TrOLLKiLLeRs1
      @TrOLLKiLLeRs1 Год назад +3

      I'm pretty sure they are our number one import now.

    • @honeyholly001
      @honeyholly001 Год назад +2

      Someone from the pony club asked a community page where they could source road cones for jumps. The response was as you'd expect. (Just about every road has them here).

    • @mandaout2427
      @mandaout2427 Год назад +4

      They bloom fully in March around the country

    • @bamboo_craft
      @bamboo_craft Год назад +1

      It's because the contractors charge $5 per day per cone! More cones more $$$!

  • @jdeelp
    @jdeelp Год назад +4

    Not one sheep joke..... Baaaaaaaaa hahahahaha 😂

  • @nikiTricoteuse
    @nikiTricoteuse Год назад +83

    Spot on Jimmy. As someone from Christchurch (no, really!) l was crying laughing by the time l was halfway through this. I didn't even mind you taking the puss about our accent.

  • @up.northbro
    @up.northbro Год назад +7

    Im from "anywhere but auckland" and this is fkn brilliant mate 🤣🤣🤣

  • @TascastFishing
    @TascastFishing Год назад +12

    Too bloody good! Chur bro.

  • @Analisaa.mariee
    @Analisaa.mariee Год назад +10

    Ahahaha too accurate 😂 No need to speed through the orange though, red will do just fine 🚦

  • @mitchellking4988
    @mitchellking4988 Год назад +12

    Brilliant. Nailed it. Makes me wondering if youve been living in auckland this whole time.

  • @thegingerbreadman2898
    @thegingerbreadman2898 Год назад +53

    I love your funny skits! I live in NZ so this is really funny! Please do Wellington

    • @triarb5790
      @triarb5790 Год назад +16

      He can't, you don't exist, you're not Auckland. 😉

    • @thegingerbreadman2898
      @thegingerbreadman2898 Год назад

      @@triarb5790 Idk what that means but ok ¯\_( ˊᵕˋ )_/¯

    • @nikiTricoteuse
      @nikiTricoteuse Год назад +1

      @@thegingerbreadman2898 It's a reference to the video. Tourist guy answered that when asked what Aucklanders thought about the rest of NZ. 😁

    • @davidbrennan721
      @davidbrennan721 Год назад

      Windy shit hole with GOVT kind of like Canberra

    • @martinwilkinson9590
      @martinwilkinson9590 Год назад +2

      why? nothing exists past suckland

  • @stephendickson9000
    @stephendickson9000 Год назад +15

    Bloody west islanders 😂

  • @Shiravan
    @Shiravan Год назад +162

    This is so spot on, I lived in Sydney for years and when people told me they were visiting Auckland my response was always "you could just stay here and get stuck in traffic and have the same experience for free".

    • @Quonzan
      @Quonzan Год назад +12

      Except in Auckland you don’t have to pay tolls to be stuck in traffic

    • @Shiravan
      @Shiravan Год назад +6

      @@Quonzan I think you'll find they do indeed still do that lol. Auckland is just sydney but smaller and somehow worse

    • @lizgedge9900
      @lizgedge9900 Год назад

      It’s like Sydney but just less fun.

  • @kerriemccoy1647
    @kerriemccoy1647 Год назад +31

    Keep them coming Jimmy, you are a bloody legend.

  • @Interislander957
    @Interislander957 Год назад +6

    As a Wellingtonian this is hillarious.

  • @ceruleanwildfire
    @ceruleanwildfire Год назад +20

    Hell this is so accurate it's scary. As a Saffer, and a Jafa, please do South Africa. Although you may need more than one skit due to the amount of possible material.

  • @fionadavey6859
    @fionadavey6859 Год назад +15

    The currency used is …Alternative Milks 😂😂😂😂😂
    Watched this while i was eating fush & chups 😂
    Thet was funny as Aye ! 😂😂😂👏🏻👏🏻👍🏻

    • @honeyholly001
      @honeyholly001 Год назад +1

      Went to a farmers market in west Auckland. Ordered a flat white. They only sold alternative milks. Imagine a farmers market without cows milk.

    • @fionadavey6859
      @fionadavey6859 Год назад

      @@honeyholly001 🥴

  • @rnrmfguitarworks
    @rnrmfguitarworks Год назад +7

    JAFA born and bred - not a bad summation Jimmy 😆

  • @heathertruskinger6214
    @heathertruskinger6214 Год назад +16

    Oh...those poor Kiwis !😂😂😂

  • @hgy.ytr.stephz6189
    @hgy.ytr.stephz6189 Год назад +11

    😂😂😂 funny!
    I hate those traffic cones. I swear they breed.

  • @siobhanhunt1749
    @siobhanhunt1749 Год назад +8

    Yay, I was hoping you would do a New Zealand -sorry, New Zillund- one of these!

  • @duglascampbell7967
    @duglascampbell7967 Год назад +8

    🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Jimmy you're amazun

  • @kimberleygarcia5293
    @kimberleygarcia5293 Год назад +33

    Omg this made my day 🤣🤣🤣 I love your Aussie ones (even if a lot of the jokes go over my head, as a kiwi 🤔)
    But this one totally hit the spot as a born and bread Aucklander 🤣🤣🤣🤣
    Sigghhhhh..... We suck 🤦🏼‍♀️

    • @AngieSainty
      @AngieSainty Год назад +3

      ssssshhh .... lols

    • @vogonpoetjellyfish
      @vogonpoetjellyfish Год назад +2

      As another born and bred Auckland I concur. We do suck 😄😄😄😄

    • @TrOLLKiLLeRs1
      @TrOLLKiLLeRs1 Год назад +2

      As a Wellingtonian, you don't know how to spell bred.

    • @AngieSainty
      @AngieSainty Год назад +1

      !Everyyone sucks. lols

    • @AngieSainty
      @AngieSainty Год назад +1

      @@TrOLLKiLLeRs1 lols ... maybe she shlda spelt 'inbred' .... just jokes and banter. lol

  • @SandraSallerBaziFengShui
    @SandraSallerBaziFengShui Год назад +3

    Absolutely correct ... hahahaha ... Kiwi NOT living in Auckland here ... 🤣

  • @jenesisjones6706
    @jenesisjones6706 Год назад +20

    Your videos are the highlight of my day- for the laughs they give!🤣

  • @glennt7214
    @glennt7214 Год назад +9

    Love your videos!!
    Can you do one on Newcastle NSW for us please?

  • @RatelHBadger
    @RatelHBadger Год назад +1

    As someone from the place South of the Bombay Hills... HEY!!! There's other people round here you know.
    This is bloody accurate!

  • @cherylb309
    @cherylb309 Год назад +6

    Love the ending 😂

  • @gordocooper5324
    @gordocooper5324 Год назад +2

    Absolutely brilliant!!😂😂😂

  • @steelfabric
    @steelfabric Год назад +5

    Am sitting here stroking my long beard as I eagerly await the Dingo Piss Creek version.

  • @lorainec8613
    @lorainec8613 Год назад +3

    Perfect! Simply perfect!

  • @bingonamo7520
    @bingonamo7520 8 месяцев назад +1

    It's so true. As an Aucklander, when I travel outside of Auckland, it's better to pretend you're from a quaint little town, such as horsey, leafy Cambridge. You'll get treated much better. Such was the hostility in the 80's and 90's, it was actually necessary to do this - it really was! I used to travel around the Waikato and North Island on road trips with my mother and if you lied and said you were from Cambridge and not Auckland, the attitude change was amazing!

  • @KatieA84
    @KatieA84 10 месяцев назад

    Omg Jimmy had to throw the sheep joke dead set you are a legend

  • @gregmoore2386
    @gregmoore2386 Год назад +11

    As a Jaffa this is spot on

    • @comealongcomealong4480
      @comealongcomealong4480 Год назад +2

      @Greg Moore Took me a minute to pick up the lingo. I'm thinking - are these blokes chocolate on the inside, and sunburned red on the outside? Like a jaffa.
      Just Another F***ing Aucklander. That sounds rooly mean from over here!

    • @SpecialSalads
      @SpecialSalads Год назад +1

      @@comealongcomealong4480 The whole of NZ calls Aucklanders JAFAs, but we're actually just jealous of them because it's the only part of NZ that has jobs. Sadly, the cost of rent in Auckland exceeds the pay rate of those jobs though, and they get stuck in traffic for 3 hours per day just to get to work. So, we make fun of them about that.

    • @comealongcomealong4480
      @comealongcomealong4480 Год назад

      @@SpecialSalads 😄 Thanks for the intel. Maybe sad in a way that the country has become more partitioned with population growth.

  • @twinklefarm
    @twinklefarm Год назад +5

    So funny! Do Queenstown please!!

  • @orouba14
    @orouba14 Год назад +12

    Just made my day here in sydney on this hot and stinky day. 🤣🤣❤️

  • @cee2615
    @cee2615 Год назад +5

    The joke about the guide at the end was a tad ouch BUT absolutely hysterical, loved the whole vide, you are brilliant ….😅

  • @jondnz
    @jondnz Год назад +41

    It's not everyday that I admit an Australian knows a lot about New Zealand...........today is also not one of those days

    • @rogerwilco4736
      @rogerwilco4736 Год назад +4

      True, it's far worse than they claim here!

    • @skilla69
      @skilla69 Год назад +1

      True, he made it seem far better than it actually is

  • @TheButlerNZ
    @TheButlerNZ Год назад

    I live in some other place (Wellington)..
    It's easier to count the gaps between road cones than it is to count the road cones.
    There is no Duct tape available in Wellington, its all be snapped up by the council to fix the water mains.
    To reduce traffic in Wellington they have replaced every 2nd vehicle with a diesel electric double decker bus.
    As Wellington is mainly tight hill roads, 12m long single deck busses were chosen.
    The buses take 5hrs to recharge so recharge stations have been conveniently placed in narrow streets in the suburbs that have no alternate path.
    Diesel electric busses conveniently sit idling usually at 5am but only in residential zones to prevent noise pollution in the business district.
    All of wellington is paved with cobblestone (wait that's just the patches).
    All of wellingtons smooth tarseal has been replaced with chipseal as it is cheap and reduces tread on vehicles while making it harder to use for cyclists, As the chipseal is damaged easier by vehicles it needs replacement 3 times more often than standard tarseal but as it is only 2/3rds the cost to install so using Council math, this is cheaper. Of course repairs will be made with standard tarseal (refer to cobblestone)
    To help with the fuel crisis New Zealand has several alternatives including LPG so all LPG stations in Wellington City have been removed.
    Extra Starbucks have been installed in Wellington so you can get a Coffee next door to any shop you visit.
    The damaged 100yo sewage system has been repaired by conveniently connecting the damaged lines to the storm water system.
    The 100 year old storm water system has been conveniently repaired by connecting the damaged sections to the main water supply.
    Any work in infrastructure in Wellington city will be commissioned conveniently to businesses in nearby cities rather than disrupting local businesses with work.
    (unless it's the sewage system where companies at least 100k away have been found to be more suitable than available local companies).
    As wellington is well known for its rain and wind, road priority has been conveniently aimed at cyclists especially in small shopping centres where the parking for shops is being removed in favour of passing cyclists because it has been found cyclists do the most shopping in small business areas.

  • @theyyluveva
    @theyyluveva 7 месяцев назад

    The accent 😂 is everything

  • @haydengoodall6767
    @haydengoodall6767 Год назад +2

    Here's some salt.. Pour it over my thousand cuts. Ouch. Still. At least we don't call our sheep... Echidnas!. 😆 Strayans are Echidna jockeys.

  • @LoneWolf-sh1ph
    @LoneWolf-sh1ph Год назад +7

    Great Kiwi accent 🥝🇳🇿

  • @PetrPechar1975
    @PetrPechar1975 Год назад +10

    Moved to Auckland two years ago and frankly, I'm beginning to miss Dunedin. :D

  • @TheKrispyfort
    @TheKrispyfort Год назад +20

    Dad moved to NZ , and said if he wanted to live in Auckland he would've stayed in Sydney

  • @MrSlaidback
    @MrSlaidback Год назад +1

    Yes! We've asking for ages...thanks!

  • @richardpartridge192
    @richardpartridge192 Год назад

    Bloody brilliant.........

  • @bronsonperich9430
    @bronsonperich9430 Год назад

    ‘Alternative milks’ 😂😂😂

  • @garymclean765
    @garymclean765 Год назад

    Good stuff !! Auckland sounds grouse except for the traffic!!

  • @swoopy287
    @swoopy287 Год назад

    Chur, to good this one.

  • @lids65
    @lids65 Год назад

    You didn’t miss much 😂

  • @bibbabookgirl8469
    @bibbabookgirl8469 Год назад +4

    These are fun, I like these

  • @darrenwest9319
    @darrenwest9319 Год назад

    Needs to be a Wellington and Christchurch version. :) :)

  • @bazza945
    @bazza945 Год назад +2

    They should have invested Kiwi Saver in the road cones manufacturing company. It will never go broke.

    • @bikeguy3034
      @bikeguy3034 Год назад

      The scary part is the council hires them from a private company! Someone is clipping the ticket HARD 💵💵💵

  • @king_glitchy2623
    @king_glitchy2623 Год назад +1

    I’m from nz bro I love this video just made my day thank you bro

  • @alandun27
    @alandun27 Год назад +6

    Sorry, but gin is the affectionate name for a girl called Jennifer - the corrict inswer was jun! 🤔

    • @triarb5790
      @triarb5790 Год назад +1

      I can verify this. My Kiwi sister in law is Gin. She likes drinking jun, ay.

  • @richardbug3094
    @richardbug3094 Год назад

    Lived in auckland my whole life and couldnt wait to get our as soon as I could, havent looked back since.

  • @Musiklife.9049
    @Musiklife.9049 5 месяцев назад

    😂 just discovered this guy…need to find more. Yeah, I’m a Jafa 😅

  • @akirahojo2
    @akirahojo2 Год назад +1

    The amount of cones is a scam according to a friend in the construction business. They get $$ per cone from Auckland Transport. So they would use more cones than necessary for road works.

  • @AilsaPehi
    @AilsaPehi Год назад

    😆🤣 Good one. Subbed.

  • @chevronlily
    @chevronlily 10 месяцев назад

    Literally went to Pak n Save yesterday

  • @Aussie_Truth
    @Aussie_Truth Год назад

    Hilarious 😂

  • @jaszi33
    @jaszi33 Год назад

    ❤ it!!! Please do one for Wellington, must be even more amo for them - from an ex Wellingtonian 😂😊

  • @97Mizzo
    @97Mizzo Год назад +2

    my partner is an aucklander and he and I play this all the time pissing ourselves

  • @kenjiurban
    @kenjiurban Год назад +5

    Bring on Wellington and Christchurch

  • @sophieadam9702
    @sophieadam9702 Год назад +2

    True story I went to Auckland from Brisbane with no idea. I thought I was going to the South Island. True with receipts.😮

  • @lp-gv1fc
    @lp-gv1fc Год назад

    priceless!

  • @TheKL105
    @TheKL105 Год назад +3

    Yep when I come home for a holiday to Auckland from Aus with my Aus wife and son jump into a rental car drive to visit family in North Auckland all of a sudden we are in a traffic jam or zip merger I turn to my wife and say ..where are we ...? are we still in Sydney !!.. yep times they are a changing.. especially when you've been away for a long time ! ..love going home otherwise still the same 🙂👍

    • @bikeguy3034
      @bikeguy3034 Год назад

      Rookie 😂. Golden rule mate, if you live in AKL there is one place you never want to drive too.... anywhere else in AKL 🫡

    • @TheKL105
      @TheKL105 Год назад

      @@bikeguy3034 Unfortunately no choice family had moved there 👍

  • @tombatts126
    @tombatts126 Год назад

    This is like a bad Clarke and Dawe sketch

  • @RevoRabbit
    @RevoRabbit Год назад

    Hahahah brilliant

  • @pandmmehta1972
    @pandmmehta1972 Год назад

    Awesome 😂

  • @tracykennedy6458
    @tracykennedy6458 Год назад

    Every second bus AND train!

    • @VhenRaTheRaptor
      @VhenRaTheRaptor Год назад

      Lets be fair.
      The trains aren't that bad. Its only every third train.

  • @BobJones20001
    @BobJones20001 Год назад +1

    As a New Zealander we accept that Auckland is sometimes mistaken for a part of New Zealand. Looking forward to the "economic hub" being cast adrift, along with the majority of the countries debt, crime, drug problems, homeless, and politicians

  • @Alan_Hans__
    @Alan_Hans__ Год назад +6

    Don't make eye contact while you are looking down a bit.

  • @JdeeGeekyGao
    @JdeeGeekyGao Год назад +8

    I lived in Sydney I preferred living there to even stopping through Auckland on a flight on the way home.

  • @samanthafairweather9186
    @samanthafairweather9186 Год назад +35

    This is so true!! Who wants to go to Auckland anyway? 🤣

    • @rogerwilco4736
      @rogerwilco4736 Год назад +2

      Who wants to go to New Zealand?

    • @mattyb7736
      @mattyb7736 Год назад +6

      ​@@rogerwilco4736 at least its better than Queersland

    • @JamesDavy2009
      @JamesDavy2009 Год назад

      @@mattyb7736 Fun fact: Queersland starts and ends at the Gold Coast.

    • @mattyb7736
      @mattyb7736 Год назад

      @@JamesDavy2009 i thought it started just out of Sydney and ended at Cape York

    • @JamesDavy2009
      @JamesDavy2009 Год назад +1

      @@mattyb7736 Once you leave the Gold Coast, you enter bogan territory the size of Alaska. Sure Brisbane may be an exclave of sorts, but the rest of QLD is all bogan. I have less knowledge of NSW between Sydney and the border as the only time I spent in NSW was in Tweed Heads within walking distance of the twin pillars.

  • @johnnimbus8761
    @johnnimbus8761 Год назад +3

    It was worth it for the last 5 seconds!

  • @tomasrikona4021
    @tomasrikona4021 Год назад

    Disturbingly accurate. Spooky.😳

  • @dinneratmidnight6196
    @dinneratmidnight6196 Год назад

    Sad... but true! 😆

  • @thesystemera
    @thesystemera Год назад

    So true.

  • @bjw4859
    @bjw4859 Год назад +1

    You missed 2 main points, dole blugers as exports & J R R Tolkein fans as the major import, there may be some tourism in there as well..

  • @66fordman
    @66fordman Год назад +1

    🤣As a lifelong JAFA I agree with all the comments below, so accurate.

  • @GooseBucket-hr1go
    @GooseBucket-hr1go 4 месяца назад

    Watched with with my family as research before we teenagers are taken to Tassie for the first time. We're staying with a cousin 😂

  • @anovemberstar
    @anovemberstar Год назад

    As a keee-weeee myself - hilarious. Ps I'm not an Aucklander lol

  • @Richard-yi9yt
    @Richard-yi9yt Год назад

    you ain't missing out

  • @karinamaissin7890
    @karinamaissin7890 Год назад +2

    so spot on from an Aklder

  • @lxopenfirexl7007
    @lxopenfirexl7007 Год назад

    Im from akl, live in the b.o.p, this is accurate asf haha

  • @johnboikov1360
    @johnboikov1360 Год назад +7

    But he didn't ask hum for hus passport! Or do Aussies just consider NZ another state?

    • @JamesDavy2009
      @JamesDavy2009 Год назад +1

      No, we consider NZ as a target for condescension.

    • @nakedarse2507
      @nakedarse2507 Год назад +2

      Get it right - nth island , sth island , west island....

    • @charlesthebald3671
      @charlesthebald3671 Год назад

      The Australian Constitution has provisions that would allow New Zealand to join as a state whenever it wants. New Zealanders would find this hilarious if they knew about it.

    • @gorillaau
      @gorillaau Год назад

      ​@@charlesthebald3671 Do we have to accept those from Auckland as well? Or can we we create an economic exclusion zone around it.

    • @gorillaau
      @gorillaau Год назад

      ​@@nakedarse2507 no, no, no. North island, South Island and Mainland

  • @vipermarn
    @vipermarn Год назад

    Another Roo let loose from the Con-Tribe🤣🤣🤣... JAFA all day!!

  • @sueelliott4793
    @sueelliott4793 Год назад

    Crack up !!

  • @sandpiperuk
    @sandpiperuk Год назад

    The tram driver in Christchurch points out the best shops (shups) for an Aussie to buy his All Blacks T shirts from.

  • @craigjones6557
    @craigjones6557 Год назад

    Classic

  • @TheKrispyfort
    @TheKrispyfort Год назад +1

    Did Jimmy just quote Jeff Bridges' character from 'Starman'?

    • @TheKrispyfort
      @TheKrispyfort Год назад +1

      Red light stop, Green light go, Yellow light go very fast

  • @dankishore193
    @dankishore193 Год назад

    Expensive coffee in ponsonby is accurate

  • @alexandermenzies7610
    @alexandermenzies7610 Год назад +1

    Kiwi here, love it mate. But what would I know, I'm an Aucklander.

  • @_e621
    @_e621 Год назад

    need to do one for hamilton

  • @6DunJuan9
    @6DunJuan9 Год назад

    Accurate AF!

  • @yodad4776
    @yodad4776 Год назад +1

    As a kiwi FUCKING love it

  • @lorenehughes
    @lorenehughes Год назад +7

    As someone who was born in Auckland and lived there till I was 6, I always say I grew up in the central north island 🤣 and I'd never willingly live in Auckland again... I tried in my 20's... Big fat nope!

  • @moana_nui
    @moana_nui Год назад +1

    when I was in hawkes bay a few years back my parents made me take off my jumper because it said auckland on the back

  • @54Rocketeer
    @54Rocketeer Год назад

    Perfect and they’re 100% Jafa’s too!

  • @danman6358
    @danman6358 Год назад

    accurate.