I used to say it could have been worse. It got me through a lot of bad times. Then, 4 years ago, the worse actually happened; I lost my daughter, my only child, to cancer. Now I say. I got through (if that's possible) the worst thing that could happen. Now, at age 65, I help to raise her daughters (16 and 18) because their dad could not get through the worst thing that happened to him. I help my granddaughters learn to grow up to be strong, independent women. That is my gift to my daughter. I try to keep my old sense of humor that my daughter loved so much. I continued to work every day until I retired, 5 months ago (that was hard). So, my "starting over" was learning how to live without my daughter. I had to struggle with questions like "am I still a mom if I no longer have a child" and what it will it be like to never hear someone say, "hey mom" ever again. I had to learn to listen attentively to my friends talk about their adult children and not be angry or jealous that they are still moms. Now, my "things could be worse" affirmations are: thank God for my beautiful granddaughters; they give me a reason to live and be happy again. I guess we all start over in our own way after various events and phases of our lives. Love your videos; they always make me think and smile. Thank you!
Hello Dawn, thank you so much for being here. I read your words twice over. I did cry...i am so deeply sorry for your loss. What an amazing gift to your daughter, yourself, and your two girls that they know you as a Mother/Grandmother figure...and oh how they must love you so deeply. Your words touched my heart so much and allowed me to see that loss comes in many ways and how we cope with it may be less important than our will to live the best way we can for ourselves and for others. Turning our sorrow and anxiety into action and purpose. Your words will stick with me long after today...I hope I am so lucky to see you here again. Your heart is so beautiful....xo Love to you and your girls, Susan & Dez
Lost my 17 year old son to Leukemia. I am one of the few that truly understand what its like. One foot in front of the other - years go by - then decades and finally you can smile and laugh when you remember your child. But have I healed - NO. There's still a whole, but I have learned how to live again and enjoy the present. Sending prayers your way.
Lost my son 21 devastating got divorced at 44 now 79. I guess I learned to be a strong 💪 person left with nothing. Now have a house. Just retired from Wall Street. Living my life with beautiful memories of my son. And have beautiful daughter and grandchildren. Stay strong ladies. Life’s not easy 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏❤️🥰you start over because that’s life.
At 65 starting over yet again. God help me. I am thankful for my health, my job, my income, my car and my new 2 bedroom apartment overlooking the city. Thank you God, my help comes from the Lord.
@@LWRCRight, just like a woman "makes" a 'man' (you're really no man, just a male) hit her. Get your abu&ive axx on. Literally get out of here. Why are you here??? This channel? The planet?? Don't you have some Red Pill content you could be choking on? Go
Trying to start over myself. He & I were together 34 years, that was 10 years ago. He is remarried to his lover and I am still lost and alone. This year I am going to live a wonderful life and find my joy and happiness again.
I was a month short of my 60th birthday when my ex husband threw me out without a job or savings. I bounced from house to house for 4 months....but now 5 1/2 years later...I have NO REGRETS
My husband left me for a younger woman age 45 after a 25 year marriage. He had been a headteacher but he left me penniless and homeless. I am also blind. God helped me and I discovered that I had some amazing friends. I also discover that some friends weren’t friends at all. One thing that helped me was getting up early and going out - just to say hello. I got a job and rebuilt my life, my job was a huge help. I also learned to go out and eat alone in places where I didn’t feel uncomfortable - this was a big help. The biggest thing that helped me, however, was to accept that my husband wasn’t coming back. Now I am so glad he didn’t! Thank you for your channel. ❤️
Divorced at 61 and started completely over. Scared as hell but new I did the best thing for me. I’m free from the hell the narcissist put me through. Happy, healthy and doing very well.
@@cats2ish no one seems to know how to stick it out with one woman any more.....men have thousands of young women to look at and chat with on the internet in SO many ways....it is tearing families apart
Hello! My husband left me after 43 years of marriage. It was very hard for me I cried all the time! My two daughters helped me through it! I prayed a lot too! It’s been 3 years now and I thank God every day. I have so much peace in my life now and I am truly blessed! God bless you !
Thanking God is the best way to do it!. I'm having a bad divorce day today, but I will just keep saying "Thank you Lord" until I feel better, and remember, it could be much worse.
I am 57,single,live alone and I have never been as content as I am now, being manless is the best thing ever. My whole life revolved around my significant other,I couldn't bear the thought of being alone. I wish I had realized how happy I would be without a man in my life. Ladies most men just drag us down,life is so wonderful without a man. Men don't want romance,women do. Men want variety,women want one good man. These are the facts. Ladies you are worth so much,a man should lift you up. If he doesn't drop him like a bad habit.
OMG you are speaking right to me tonight.....I feel I need a man to make my life complete...I miss my 20 year long marriage....I was alone for 13 years then I fell in love with this guy who has abused me and used me horribly for the past 2 years and I can't leave him .....I just love him so much ..i don't know why....he is horrible to me....I mean horrible.......yet I keep begging for his love and attention.....I don't live with him so that is a help.....but he is a player for sure and needs variety .....but all I want is HIM....he is killing me every day.....now I have stage 4 cancer and he doesn't even know......I beg for his scraps.....it is so sick and sad ....I feel pathetic
may I suggest that you, as a woman, are not in a position to speak about "what men want". men want love and romance and togetherness and happiness. Just because you had a bad marriage does not make all men bad and selfish just as it doesn't make all women bad and selfish. It is wonderful that you are happy alone and that you "don't need a man", but telling women that "men don't want romance. Men want variety" is a distorted and harsh judgment call on your part. I can assure you that for every man "looking for variety", there is a woman looking for variety too.
I'm just about to turn 50. Last year, after a violent incident, and losing our family home, I left my marriage of 16 years, with my 16 y/o daughter. We left with only the clothes we stood up in, and my estranged husband being in and out of County jail, facing many pending criminal charges. Thanks to the grace of my many friends (and strangers), I resolved to take my new life day-by-day (moment by moment, if I had to). Things are getting better. We now have our own apartment, that is safe, secure, and fills regularly with sunshine. We both feel beyond blessed. Thank-you for sharing your wisdom and insight. We are all on a journey.
My husband went through some kind of mid life crisis and decided he did not want be married anymore after 26 years. I did not see it coming and was heart broken. I loved him very much. I was also 60. It has been 6 yrs now and I am a stronger, more independent person. Women are survivors and we are more powerful than we think we are.
I was 55 at the time of my divorce and it took me about 3 years before I didn't cry at least once a day. One day I realized I hadn't cried at all for a couple of days and now I can't remember the last time I cried. I think that's ok.
I'm starting over because my husband passed. It happened during Covid quarantine. I'm paralyzed, confused, disorganized... so alone. I can't go through boxes, I can't open mail. I live in 2 rooms, in a 4 bedroom house. But, I am making progress. I'm trying to make new friends, reconnect with old friends, even those far away. One day at a time...
Thank you for a lovely video as usual. You are an inspiration. l was divorced after 55 years of marriage but not an angry situation. It was fair - l got the house he got the income. We never fought afterwards. Pushing 80 l sold the house, moved to another country l could afford, bought a new place and love the people here and the wonderful expats l have met. Every day is an adventure learning the language and never have been sorry for one minute. It has been 3 years and l am so happy. Needless to say many people were shocked at my action but now want to visit.
I find your comment VERY inspirational. I'm nearly 66 and hate where I live and am in the slow process of preparing to move out. I'm thinking of moving to another city which I think might suit my personality more. Where I'm living is very aggressive and rough. The new city has a reputation for being friendly and artistic and polite - all my styles, so hopefully I get there and find a better fit. All I want is a peaceful kind place where I can set up a home just the way I like it and pursue my artistic practice, do some writing and hopefully meet some people with common interests and kind personalities.
A line from Shakespeare, I think King Lear, is that when we say things are the worst, they are not. when things are truly the worst, we will not know it! I was left in our countryside home with 2 young children, no car!, by an alcoholic husband. Who also had a girlfriend. I had the support of both sides of the family and a 4 year degree + teaching certification. I was heart broken and my best friend sent me a card that said on the journey, I would emerge on the other side of a bridge- not sure if how I got there, but would never want to go back. It proved so true when I saw things as they really are. I found out how much resolve I had!! Daughters grew up great- they have good mates. One daughter is a chiropractor and other a lawyer. With FIRST QUALITY HEARTS!!
When a man doesn't want you or want you anymore, respect yourself enough to accept it and don't cry over it, he's not crying over it, he's excited to start life without you.
While I appreciate your attitude, when a woman is devastated, and she just craves for him to still want her, that's going to take some of us time to overcome. Not crying over it will come later. Thanking God the loser left will come later. But for now...some of us need to let our broken heart cry. 🙂
If only ever time something bad happened werl could just get over it. If only it was that black and white. Give me someone who is vulnerable, authentic and honest than Ms Sunshine Positivity.
He doesn't want to be there while the grass looks greener but when he realizes it's turf and he needs you he comes crawling back. I wish women would stop running to their rescue. Two of my friend's fathers did the same thing and when they got sick the mothers took care of them after they left them cheated on them and treated them badly in the marriages
As a 71 year old woman starting over was hard I was 55 when my husband died from a massive stroke and I’m still in recovery because everyday there is something new so I say to those of you who’s watching and reading you can make it just awaken each morning thanking God YOU are able to see another day and keep progressing. From Texas
Cynthia I can relate to you my dear my husband passed away 11 years ago and I still shed a tear drop for him everyday ! I’m 70 years and really feel that I’m just waiting to pass away sometimes, I’m very active and my daughter lives with me with her beautiful Swiss white shepherd . But deep down in my heart I know my life will never be the same with out my husband . Praise God I’m a Christian , without the lord in my life I know i wouldn’t make day to day ! Im sending a prayer your way my sister in Christ , God Bless You 🙏🏻❤️🇺🇸
I am 73 and lost my husband 14 years ago. I miss him every day. I understand how you feel. A great guy married me. He was and is my life's greatest blessing. I wish you calm and peace...until you meet again.
I had to start over at 40 my husband left me for his mistress. And later married her. Lesson I learned is it doesn’t matter how pretty you are how good you are men can decide to go. So I became very independent and strong and slowly re built my life. I find everyone changes as they get older and we want different things.
I am a 59 year old guy 2 years out of divorce from the woman I always thought was the love of my life. I just found your channel. I realize it is intended to be for women. I hope you don’t mind that I watch your videos. But I have to say…how on this earth is a woman as beautiful and sweet and funny and….and…and…..there just arent enough good things to say about you. But how are you still single??? How is that possible??? There must be a long line of men at your door vying for your attention. I hope that one day the right one finds you and treats you with all the love and respect that you deserve. You are really something. It breaks my heart to hear you talk about crying. Women like you should never cry. EVER!!! Keep the videos coming. I enjoying hearing your voice and energy.
Two things help me: a short list of good decisions I'd made, like buying my car, and, when I just feel lousy I think of another lousy time-- that I'd gotten past, of course then I can tell myself "you won't always feel this way. All I had to do was replace "divorce " with "life altering illness " for our stories to be so similar. What you've shared translates to every unplanned life change. I know God led me to your channel. At 61 I'm sitting in a physical rehabilitation recovering from multiple illness, including a stroke. Life may never be the same, but I do believe it can be even better. Thanks 🎉
Raised three beautiful children in Maryland, lost my grocery store, ended up in a homeless shelter in California. Threw my pity party for so long but things are turning around. Now I know my true friends. Awesome Susan.
Two things have changed my life and saved my life. First, meditation. I went through a period of high anxiety, including panic attacks. Meditation and an excellent teacher saved my life and I’ve never suffered from anxiety again. The other thing that has saved my life recently was having put in place medical authority and power of attorney a few years ago. In late September I had an outpatient surgery that ended me being in the hospital for nearly 2 months, including nearly 3 weeks in the ICU, intubated and in an induced coma. I cannot count on family to help nor make the right decisions for me. Thank goodness I chose these 3 people so well. When I was discharged my surgeon told me that he never saw 3 friends works so well together in their friend’s interest. When I woke up I knew I had a new life and that I was alive thanks to my friends love and support throughout. ❤
Just celebrated 30 years of marriage today. He is such a good man. Woke up to flowers and a mushy card. I am grateful for him and to him for giving us a wonderful daughter. I am 70 now and hope nothing changes our love for one another. I wish everyone out there a loving and good life.
Your husband was a complete and utter schmuk to let go such a lovely lady such as you. I'm confident he will always regret it. I know I don't know you personally but I'm so proud of how you turned your life around. You are truly an inspiration x
I have a wonderful husband, but at present, we're going through a rough patch. After a hysterectomy about 12 years ago, and getting older, I find sex to be VERY painful. So, I just don't care for it. Really, I don't have any desire for it, but he does. 😞 To boot, he is a noisy, restless sleeper (snoring, gasping, sometimes screams at night, and at times twitchy, although a heavy sleeper, and I suffer from insomnia. So, I don't like to sleep with him. We're both missing that intimacy we used to have when we first got married. So, all that is taking a toll on our marriage. We're living like roommates rather than husband and wife. He's very unhappy, and I'm unhappy that he's unhappy. I swore that I would never mention the "d" word, but lately...well I don't know. I hope we find a way to patch things up. 😞
@marialeach8960 do your best to work it out. Sex is a compromise for both partners, but sex or at least intimacy is important at every age. Fill the sex gaps with lots of other kinds of assuring intimacy like cuddling, massages (doesn't have to be sexual massage), kind words, doing special things for each other. Look into sexual activities that don't require actual intercourse. Research how you might alleviate your sex pain with methods or positions or lubrication. Chances are, his sex drive is slowing down or will slow down. Probably he doesn't want SEX as much as he just doesn't want to be rejected by you. When you reject his sexual advances, it is hurtful to him. As for his sleeping noises, it sounds like he might have sleep apnea which can be treated. He might also have anxiety which can be helped professionally. Seek help with professional counselors and doctors instead of lawyers. The cure for the problems you describe are easier to fix and have better results than divorce. Divorce really sucks.
Maria, I am so sorry for your pain. I too have suffered with loss of intimacy because of the pain (married 41 years). Maybe you should check out hormone replacement therapy? There’s an MD on RUclips who explains everything in detail called Menopause Barbie. Because of the education I got from her, I started back on hormones and even though I am 62, sex is at last no longer painful. It was terrible and sad to lose that closeness with my husband too. I pray you are able to get the help you need. Take care.
I was married for 27 1/2 years. My husband decided to marry someone he had an affair with at work. We had just built a log home and he was going to retire from there. I started over, losing that home and having to move to another area of the state to get a job and support myself. I had to reinvent myself. Thank you for sharing your life with all of us.
Congratulations Connie....you broke free! I am sorry you had to go through that initial pain but thank goodness you are done with him. Thank you so much for sharing your story with us....you are beautiful!!! You are free! xxoo Happy weekend!!! Susan & Dez
Thank you for sharing your story of victory. I got hit by a car and in recovery am thinking about what I will do once I’m walking again. Better relationships. I wish you true happiness.
I moved 9 times since my divorce 11 years ago. I am so tired of moving and starting over but I am blessed to get to start over and not have to answer to anyone.
Thank you for the encouragement. I too am over 60. And after 30 years of marriage find myself starting over. It’s good to know that the sun will shine once more in the future.
I hope the sun will shine for me too. After 33 years of being married I was told he didn't love me any more and said he knew I had a one night fling 12 years ago which I never had. This and for other reasons I believe he as dementia but I can't prove it. I am sorry for him but I can't live this way. I don't have any money but where do I start? No friends or family. I feel lost.
My husband is divorcing me after almost 39 years of marriage. He feels he deserves to be happy and is hoping to find a young women to date(good luck with that). I’m just trying to stay strong for my kids and grandkids. It affects us all. I’m so thankful I have the assurance that God is my protector and will get me through this heartbreaking divorce. 😢
@@conniesolano7549 I'm with you! 37 yrs here! Just poof, he's gone. Moved 13 hrs away.. but we're stronger than we think! We got this, let's show our babies and grand babies what a strong blood line they come from!! Love to you & God bless.
I went through a lot of financial crisis during my divorce, I had to raise my two kids alone, Currently I'm living smart and frugal with my money. Bought my second house already. Saving and investing lifestyle made it possible for me; even till now I earn monthly through passive income. I'm planning on retiring when my kids finish college..
I'm a single dad. Not quite long I started investing. I'm very curious and need help on how to enhance and increase my returns. Any good investment tips would be appreciated
@Puneet Jajoo JR That’s great , your investment advisor must be really good,I have seen testimonies of people using the help of investment advisors in making them more financial stable. Do you mind sharing more info on this person?
@Puneet Jajoo JR Just got out of my marriage,I have had the intentions of starting investing. But I always thought it was late and I think I need to stop procrastinating. I will definitely 🔍 Regina Louise Collaro and see what she can advise .Thanks a lot . This was of so much help to me .
@Puneet Jajoo JR You are right, I am one of many who has benefited from investing with Regina Louise Collaro. 2020 is an unforgettable year in my life, back then I lost my job due to covid, my marriage and had no reason to live. Regina made a good life possible for me through passive income and I owe her my life. To be honest, I feel like she is an angel of who was sent to help those who are suffering financially.
I was married once and was so in love. One day he left without saying anything to me. I was devastated. I cried every single day and felt horrible. I had anxiety and panic attacks. I sold my home and moved to two small rooms in my parent home in the basement. It was so sad and depressing for me. I used to go running every night after work and all I Did was cry and cry some more. One night after my run I came to my small apartment, and I was mad with God and asked Him why I was not getting help from Him. I was so exhausted from crying, and I dropped on my sofa. I felt the voice of God saying to me, how can I help you if you never stay quiet enough to hear me. After that night my life change drastically, and I was happy for the first time in month. That is part of my journey.....today Iam happy and look forward to a new day.................thanks for sharing your story and for allowing me to shared part of mine................until........................MUCH LOVE, MINDY
Mindy, isn't it wonderful when we learn to communicate with God. When your loved one leaves , it is just like death. Been there. Blessings for you. 🌹❤️
Mindy that’s awesome!! My husband has stage 4 cancer and not doing well. I have accepted he will pass away and my life will be vastly different. Of course I can’t really know until it happens how I will handle things but I do think about it often. I pray that I can continue to find happiness and reasons to smile. You sharing your story has encouraged me. Thank you.
Suzan, because you have given me the strength to do so..... I have an appointment with a divorce lawyer next week. After 45 years of marriage.... I am ready to live my life. Thank you ❤️
Best to you Rosemary. I've been there done That. Just remember not every day will be sunshine and rainbows. But not every day will be dog eat dog either. Find something of the little girl in you to find who you are. I once took some craft paint and painted 🎨 roses all along the edge of my bathroom mirror 🪞. Why? Because I could. Turned out so cute I painted Easter eggs on entry mirror. Wish you the best.
Thank you for the empowering message. Literally while I was watching this video, my spouse of 40 years told me to talk to a divorce lawyer because it is over. Susan, you, and this community are so very helpful in these difficult times.
You were talking about me when my husband left after 25 years together. The part your right is I was so hurt that my life would never be the same. A life I loved. I’v never lived by myself until he left. I hate being alone, I never dreamed I’d be divorced at 69 yrs old and totally by myself. It’s been two yrs and I still can’t believe how fresh the wounds are. I never can get it out of my mind. Thanks Susan you always make me feel better and I love listening to you . Take care and stay well. Till next time.
My husband walked out on me and left me in Canada, exactly 4 years ago tomorrow, after 37 yrs. I was 63 yrs young. We had duo citizenship so I choose to stay in Canada and that was the best decision I ever made. It was hard but I rediscovered myself after losing my identity in him. I’m not young but, I’m not old. I’m here. Flourishing and loving life. You are such an inspiration, Susan. ❤️😘🌹
Whenever I start feeling a bit sorry for myself, I think about how lucky I really am. And think about my blessings and don’t focus on my tragedies - and there have been plenty. I’ve been a widow for over 20 years. But have had a happy fulfilled life in the time since. I live in a nice apartment in a lovely town and have a sweet little dog who brings me joy every day. Life at 80 is good. 😊
I’ve been divorced for 17 years. I died the day, a Sunday, I found him with someone else. He asked me for a divorce that same day and next Friday we signed the papers. I had to learn to breath. I lost 30 pounds. I had married in love wanting to die beside my husband. My prayer every day was to survive that day. The same prayer for six months. Over and over and over again. I am a special education teacher and I never missed a day of work. My students mom every once in a while I’d need one of the moms to watch my students while I went into the bathroom to cry. And I did. And then I came out to work again. I prayed and prayed and prayed. I went to a psychologist. My parents and best friends lifted me up. And after six months I was able to breathe and walk again. My heart had scars but it had started to heal. These years have been difficult. No economic support from my ex for my kids but I am a brave hard working woman and God has been good. We have been tight money wise but have never gone with out a meal on our table. I am grateful. God is so good he gave a chance to be truly happy, loved and in peace. Women are strong and God is good. One day a time. I made it through. You can too. We all can. ❤️ Love from Costa Rica to you Susan and to all the woman working hard today. Don’t let go of Gods hand! ☺️🙏🏼🌸🇨🇷
Lost so much in this past year....a Tsunami of Trauma what with 3 deaths...one which broke my heart...my place of birth burned down....my original birth certificate has been lost in the post...I was unfairly omitted from my mother's obituary by my sister(family feud).... moved home to a completely different area from city to deep countryside ....my beautiful baba cat of 15 years died a few months before my move....I'M FEELING LOST AND OVERWHELMED BY THESE CHANGES !! Your video which suddenly came up on my feed is so Welcome and Inspirational....giving me hope of not only finding myself again but to embrace all that is new....one day at a time ! 🙏❤
Women are leaving their husbands late in life too. I did a study on the subject. Here are some explanations why women called it quit after many years of marriage. "I would never feel that I was actually retired if I stayed with him." "The stress of growing older seemed to be all on me and not on him". "I was nothing but a nurse and housekeeper but did not get paid and received no credit." "I wanted to simply for once in my life focus on my own needs". "There was no happiness possible living with him."
You really hit the nail on the head. People say that love is blind, they are right. I think a lot of women of my generation, were nurturers. I didn't realize that he didn't care about my needs as much. It seems that people don't change how they think, they do change how they feel, because, then they want someone to care about how they feel.
You are an inspiration to me. I will be 71in May, thought I married the love of my life Sep 2012, messy divorce. In process of packing up my house with the help of a 48 yo friend, going to finish packing and loading truck tomorrow, unload at new townhouse, starting over with a twin bed, microwave, computer, and a dream of going to grad school to obtain masters social work, dual degree mental health and substance abuse. I have been in my current position 16 yr in August, love what I do. Watching your videos helps to keep me moving forward. Blessings dear one.
The first time I started over, I was 30. I was married to the love of my life (a musician) and surprise surprise….he cheated on me. I was devastated. The 2nd time I started over I was 40 with a 2 year old son. So devastated this time for my son. What helped me start over was I knew I was never alone. My deep faith in God/Jesus helped me through. Knowing he was always with me made it so comforting. Also, family and close friends. Like you, I always thought that there are people that are suffering and have it much more difficult than my situation. Then at 42, I was diagnosed with the worst case of leukemia- AML. I was always grateful I had my parents always by my side when there were people in the rooms next to me fighting alone. There is always someone that has it worse than you do. Also, your channel has really helped me in a lot of different ways. You are like my mentor and you give me ways to cope and you have such an artistic way of expressing yourself and I love that! Thank you for everything that you do for so many people in sharing your life. I’m so glad I found your channel. Love, Devon Leigh ❤️
At 61, my life seemed more like a tattered jigsaw puzzle that had been put together and torn apart one too many times. Like you, Susan, I couldn't get my thoughts together, I felt a gamut of emotions, grief, loss, failure, hurt, betrayal, empty. All I could do was cry or sleep to escape the dread of every day waking up to the same emotional upheaval, hours wasted just staring at a blank wall, zoning out. Like the old pinball ball machines that would hit TILT, and everything stopped, that's how my life felt, and at one point I wanted it over for good. But each day, I started to realize I could breathe again, I had no more anxiety, I could seriously grasp what internal peace and calm felt like. I felt truly free. My whole life had revolved around someone else, what they liked, what they wanted, how they wanted things, was I pretty enough, thin enough, and on and on, until I wasn't really there anymore. I'd put me on a shelf somewhere and then forgot about me. I really didn't know who I was anymore. But everyday I started to get to know myself again. I felt incredibly free...I only had to take care of ME. What I wanted to cook IF I wanted to cook, how I wanted to decorate my place to please ME, buy furniture without consulting anyone but ME, myself, and I. It was soooo much fun! Taking care of myself, learning to love myself, instead of constantly feeling like a one woman entertainment committee, that if I didn't measure up, and perform everything correctly, I could easily be replaced. It was like walking on eggshells every day. Going it alone is a major adjustment, it's really a type of death, and there is going to be a mourning period. Everyone deals with the loss differently, but once you start loving on yourself, like you loved on someone who maybe didn't value you, it's the greatest thing. Loneliness comes and goes, but mostly goes. I know some people feel like they need someone in their life, but I think, the more time you spend taking care of yourself, you realize you don't really NEED someone...you may want someone, then again, you may realize that you kind of enjoy being free. And that's okay too.
@@christinehodder2747 Oh my gosh, Christine...how tragic. I can't fathom losing my only sister. As we've both gotten older, I think about it more often. We're just 3 years apart. She's the one I call or text about everything on a daily basis, and I tell her I love her every time. How painful for you to lose your sister; I can't imagine the depth of loss and grief. I'm praying for your wounded heart. But I am very glad she had a taste of joy and freedom for herself...even though it wasn't for as long as she or you may have wished.
Everyone that replied here has helped me today and Susan's video was very sad and away because of what Billy did to her 20 years with one man. I left a man after 15 years because he had PTSD. Thought at 43 I would find someone that would treat me well but I didn't. Every man had bandages and it never worked out. It was again a sad time and now I feel I can't let a man hurt me anymore. So how do you go on when you really want love again?
Thank you for sharing this, Michel. You are right -- being totally responsible for yourself can be scary and intimidating, but gaining your own sense of autonomy and power is the most wonderful thing!
@@susan6398 the book that the back was read during this video that Susan got at the thrift store..."Traveling Light" by Max Lucado, has been such a blessing to me. I read it in just a couple days, not realizing there was a study guide in the back, so I'm re-reading it and doing the study guide at my own pace. I think one of the first things we really have to do is realize the baggage we ourselves carry around. It really impacts the type of people we're attracted to...and sometimes they're really NOT the kind of person that's good for us...but there are subconscious signals we give off and others give off that we may recognize as familiar and we end up gravitating towards that end up just the same as the hurtful relationships we've had before. When I was trying to figure out why I always met people who seemed so wonderful in the beginning, romantic, attentive, kind...everything I wanted...only to end up with another physically and verbally abusive person...it felt like I must deserve this because that's how each person treated me. I got to a point where I just wanted to die, just so the pain would stop. Then one day I picked up a book, can't even recall the title of it. It was written by 2 psychologists. In one chapter they were talking about being co-dependent. A term I didn't fully understand...but they described it like this: You're a recovering alcoholic, you're invited to a big party. But at this party no alcohol will be served at all. There are about 100 guests at the party, and somewhere in that group of 100 people there's 1 other recovering alcoholic. By the end of the evening, those 2 alcoholics will be together at the party. They said that when a person is healthy, normal, they see/recognize the RED FLAGS given off by the alcoholic, and heed those RED FLAGS as warning signs. To another alcoholic, who is familiar with all the RED FLAGS and know the ins and outs of alcoholic struggles, instead of being a warning to stay away or avoid...it's more like a gigantic WELCOME sign. This can apply to any relationship. It can be an abuser relationship. Abusers can pick out a potential victim in a group the same way and will zero in on them. I actually dated a very kind person; gentle, so compassionate and caring...and I couldn't handle it. I used to tell friends I could bob and weave to avoid getting hit, but had no idea how to receive being treated kindly. It wasn't until I turned 29 and gave my life to Jesus that He showed me just how precious and wonderful He saw me. He showed me I deserved to be treated with love and compassion. But, as the book, Traveling Light, describes..a lifetime of crap makes us carry a bunch of baggage that Jesus says we don't need to bear. We first have to recognize the baggage and then lay it at His feet and trust Him to take care of each burden as we recognize what they are. They're really like bricks we build around our hearts, that prevent us from loving freely without taking one of those bricks and throwing at the person trying to get to know you.. If we don't figure out the baggage and work to get rid of it one piece at a time, we'll just keep being attracted to the same type of people who end up treating us the same way as the bum we got rid of or who betrayed us. Trust is a big issue with me. Do I trust God enough to remove a bag of betrayal, fear, pain, bitterness? Until I work on my trust issues and unload the baggage, I'll just build walls around my heart like a fortress and would throw them at anyone who attempted to come into my life. I'm gonna be 70 this year and don't have time to waste anymore on a relationship I'd no doubt sabotage and end up saying..see, I knew this would happen. Nope...I gotta work on unloading some baggage. I hope you find the person who will love you like you want to be loved....and you might think about getting Max Lucado's book...I laughed and cried...but I'm working on being free of a lot of burdens Jesus says I don't need to carry.
Hi there my name is Steve I'm 61 years old I'm so sad what you ladies went true I just didn't know there was so many crazy guys doing these things😢 please take care of yourself Whis you the best. Don't give up you ladies are special ❤
I left my husband at age of 58. We were married 34 years, together 36. I loved him very much but he was verbally, mentally and emotionally abusive. I thought my life was over. You are right, positive thoughts kept me into the positive mind set. Doing thinks I enjoyed helped me to start enjoying life again. Enjoying being on my own was hard but I love myself now. Thank you for your videos. You have helped me understand that being alone does not make me lonely.
Congratulations on breaking free! Oh I agree with you....alone does not equal loneliness...there is nothing more lonely than being abused by the one person that vowed to cherish, protect and love you. That is true loneliness...A very happy weekend to you! Love Always, Susan & Dez
@@rhondaalan8436 I loved him and always hope it would get better. We have 2 children together who I wanted to grow up in a normal family. It was not the best decision but I did what I thought was best for them. I knew things were not normal but I realized after I left he was a narcissist. It was devastating but it answered a lot of questions on why he treated me so badly. My life has just begun. I try to think, things could be worse. My children and grandchildren are my life.
@@annetterhynold5177 that’s how it is with me after 39 years 3 kids, 8 grandkids. and he wants to leave me now. But the thing is Im not ready to let him go sad as that sounds!
@@annetterhynold5177: Narcissist always blame the other person for their miserable existence, and they gaslight the victim into believing there is something wrong with them. you integrate his reality of you and it destroys the true self.. But not completely. You will survive and thrive if you decide . God Bless.
To all the women who have started over after a heartbreaking situation - You've got this! Susan, your video brought tears to my eyes. I've moved on after my ex-husband left me for another woman years ago. It was cruel and heartbreaking. I was pregnant. I had been married to him for 5 years. I had morning sickness. He acted more annoyed that I was sick. Then, he would say he was going to get gas and not come home until 5 or 6 in the morning. I thought I was over this but this video still made me cry. Maybe it's because I'm grateful that I was able to start over again. I was younger at the time. In my late 20s and pregnant with my first child. I moved back to Texas and had my baby with the support of my mom and dad. My ex and his new woman treated me like I was the "other woman" and infringing on their rights. It was a horrible time, but I came through it! I went to college and graduated. I found love again and my son is now 31 years old! My ex, my son's father died last Summer. He was an alcoholic and drank himself to death. Very sad. He had very little to do with my son. I raised him on my own with the help of my amazing parents. We do survive! Sending you love! I watch all of your videos. I love Dezi too. He's so precious.
Him leaving was a blessing to you and your son. Can you imagine if your son had an alcoholic man in his life as a role model. I doubt if the other woman was happy with him. There house was dysfunctional. You my dear was spared that disaster.
@The mysterious Miss X He was involved with his new mistress and didn't want to help. In fact, they treated me like I was the other woman. "All of you people"? There a lot of people that stand up and make promises they don't keep. Not sure why you're making this about my parents and what their responsibility was. My parents are amazing. I love them. And they loved me a lot more than my ex-husband did apparently. I would have been homeless without them. I don't know what your point is. You have a problem with my parents helping their daughter? The wedding day didn't mean much to my ex, but I meant something the THEM. Very grateful. I am way past this. It was a complete blessing.
@@texasmimi5566 Hi Texas Mimi! I am in Texas also. It was over 31 years ago. Bullet dodged for sure! He died in July 2021. I hope he found peace beyond.
My mom had three children 6, 3, & 2 when my dad left us with under $100 in the bank. She made it work. We all went to college & have successful children of our own. My brother became a PhD researcher at pfizer and was instrumental in the research that created the covid treatment. She was an amazing woman that lived until she was 97.
Thank you for sharing your story. My mother is 80 and will soon turn 81 in June. My mother got the Pfizer shot, please let your brother know I said thank you! 🌼
Your mother definitely was a strong woman. Her strength is what made you children's strong and into better adults because she put your children first. She was a pioneer of a woman because she had to be and she lived a long life. I wish I could have been strong like that.
I understood when your goal was to not cry. When my husband asked me for a divorce I was shattered, but I had to show up for work. I had my own floral biz in Park City for 25 years. In any case, I allowed myself a pity party and to cry all I wanted in the shower and I watched my tears go down the drain and it was very healing. Then, one day, the tears, they stopped.
I'm 60... I'm the one that had ZERO years with a man I loved and who loved me..... And at this age, I still pray for a good husband, even if it's only for 6 months. I haven't been hugged or given a Christmas present in 40 years by someone who loves me
Give yourself a present to you from you.Self love is a beautiful thing. Love yourself and make yourself happy. When the right man comes along he will need to love you just as much or more as he loves himself. Hug a friend.
Loneliness has its own sadness that we learn to work through, but being with someone and feeling lonely is such a bitter feeling. You see the grass as greener on the other side, but "it could always be worse" might be being married, getting crumbs and disdain and coldness from the one who is "supposed to care: Maybe the one who is supposed to care about us IS ourselves. I know this doesn't give you someone in your life, but I heard a great metaphor once that just because you didn't have a great bonfire of love was no reason not to sit by the smaller fires of others. Be those fires of friends, or acquaintances, adventures, or volunteering. ANY time 2 humans are together, there is a little campfire of the soul going , and it's okay to warm your hands and heart with a smaller fire. It is better to warm yourself by those little fires than to yearn for a great bonfire to appear while you slowly freeze to death. And you might just find that those little fires can keep you as toasty and warm as a big bonfire. My heart goes out to you, and I wish you the best. @@artsylady3187
@@nelvinlewis23I understand your point but I am in her position and I do give myself great gifts for my birthday, Christmas and sometimes just because, but it’s just not the same as receiving from someone who genuinely loves you and wants to make you feel special.
Ladies, you will be fine. Sometimes, we don't understand the magnitude of damage that is done when these men walk out. You are the epitome of all great, grand, beautiful, and wonderful things. You are equipped with everything that you need and much more inside of you❣️ Forget about him. You do not need someone that will walk out on you.....he was just a lesson, that's all... nothing more. You got the lesson now. Go and get your blessings❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️
When I walked out on him 2 years ago at 62, I wasn't sure what my future would be, but I've never looked back at that moment with regrets and I'm happier now than I have ever been as an adult. Life is beautiful... now. Thanks for sharing your story.
I am so happy to read this Kathy...I felt I almost lived some of this journey with you. You look 10 years younger since you got your divorce...that sad look in your eyes is gone! I am so happy for you!!!
I am 67 too since last September and I have been single/divorced since 2001. He was a very successful surgeon. We lived in Cairo, Egypt six months a year however, I left due to abuse physical and emotional that I had been conditioned to tolerate since a very abusive childhood. I have no children Before, and after college, I was in a long-term relationship for 16 years that also was abusive with a man who loved his mother more than life itself and even me. After 2001, I dated a few men but I no longer wanted or even trusted myself in a committed relationship and I knew I could never go through another break-up so I simply stopped trying. I used my nursing background to do some work as a Surgical Coordinator and then also used my acquired Administrative skills and worked for a Church for over two years. My Church job was eliminated due to the budget, and I worked with an oral surgeon until last April 2 when he died of the virus. After the practice was sold, I became semi-retired and I work with animals, dog walking, and cat sitting a few hours Monday to Friday to supplement my income and keep fit. I did pick myself up each time, I had no choice. It is not easy to go through life alone, but I learned to enjoy my alone time and I own my own condo. I would love to retire somewhere but have not yet zeroed in on where that would be. My family is not nearby and I take it a day at a time. I do thank God and I am grateful for what I have and I try to be content with the life I am leading. The story is not over yet.
Your comment is inspiring in that you're still working on life improvements. I'm nearly 66 and have had a very unpleasant time trying to meet nice people in a new city. It's just not worked out- except for valuable self growth. But people wise it's been brutal and currently is a bit frightening. I feel tired but need to get ready to move as soon as I can, and am considering moving to a friendlier city that could suit my personality better.
Your comment is inspiring. I'm nearly 66 and have had a very unpleasant time trying to meet nice people in a new city. It's just not worked out- except for valuable self growth. But people wise it's been brutal and currently is a bit frightening. I feel tired but need to get ready to move as soon as I can, and am considering moving to a friendlier city that could suit my personality better.
Hi Susan, thank you for today. I'm 67, and this is the loneliness I've ever been. Looking back, I realize I've always people-pleased my friendships. Needless to say, those 40+ year relationship have not survived. I woke up. Thank God. But now I have no friendships. Pray for me that someone comes along for friendship and/or companionship. Peace friend. 🙂❤
@@LadyBug31705 Thank you sweet friend. Just your responds to my comment...made my day. I will absolutely add you to my prayer time. Have a Blessed weekend. 🙏❤
@@ceciliaabwao5958 Stay strong friend. God sees you...and he hears your prayer for fellowship. We gotta believe beautiful (real) relationship are just around the way. Peace friend. 🙏❤
Right there too with many of you out there. This is what I have learned clearing the tables in your life will leave nothing on that table for awhile and maybe a long while but when you begin resetting your table it will be with a completely different set of dishes and silverware. The ones you choose and that are not chosen for you. The ones that make you rejoice and speak uniquely to the person you are today. Be patient your new table is becoming piece by piece together beautifully.
8 Year's ago August 24th 29 year's married and 8 year's of dating I was with this man my husband who was having an affair, I threw him out of the house and from there I started over, I was very scared, my late sister Patricia helped me get through most of the divorce proceeding's but she died suddenly and I no longer had her, I pushed on and when I held those divorce paper's in my hand I looked up to the sky and I said "Patricia I did it" and I cried, I still pushed on, I prayed to Jesus to give me the strength to help me and here I am happy he is out of my life, no one deserves to be treated the way he treated me and I learned to Love myself and I pushed on and on, I said No this person isn't going to bring me down anymore I continued to go to the gym through it all take care of myself and Learned I had Worth and that I'm smart and that I can take care of myself......
you deserved better than what he did to you, i am so happy he is out of your life, my daughter has been through it TWO times, the second husband was worse than the first but she is free now of both of them. i hope you continue to take care of yourself---never give up and never stop treating yourself like No. 1...you are the master of your own life.
I don't know anything about your relationship but most men have to endure an awful lot of misery to get them to the point of filing for divorce and or moving out. The main things most men want is some semi routine sexual activity and some peace and quiet. Most men don't want to be on the hamster wheel of always having to chase materialistic things in order to make a woman "happy"! But like I said I don't know anything about your relationship but sometime it does help us to do a little bit of self reflection and ask if we done everything we could have? And if the answer is yes then we can walk away with clean hands. If the answer is no then we can take the lessons that we learned from that relationship and hopefully not make the same mistakes in a new one. Good luck to you!
During one hot July l lost my husband (he died), my tenant, and my job. In that same month my daughter's nanny moved to a different Province. I was 59 (almost 60). For a year l stayed at my daughter's during the week to care for the kids. On weekends l took care of my own place. That was 17 years ago. After a year the nanny came back and l started living my own life but those were hard times. I believe we should never give up. The bad days are just bridges to better ones.
Women should be taught at very early age to have Plan B in case he changes his mind. There is no "death do us part" written in scriptures; ergo you may be traded in for a 1995. Be prepared, especially financially.😮
At least you got the house, the neighbourhood and neighbours. I was forced out of my jointly-owned home after 23 years of marriage because he decided he wanted it for his own so decided to emotionally and verbally abuse me, and break my possessions. I took a small settlement because he threatened to bankrupt me in court if I took it to court. He had hidden bank accounts. I bought a small condo in an excellent location but was in horrible state in the unit. I completely gutted it and renovated it. Over the past 5 years I have taken great pleasure putting my touches to it. I have been getting counselling to deal with the trauma. He still has the house, our neighbours and friends who believe him when he says I LEFT, poor boy! I lost literally everything, but I gained much more. Safety....freedom.....
When you said my goal is not cry , tears come from my eyes. My husband passed away 5 years ago. 2 years ago I lost my best friend- my mother in low and my daughter lovely grandma and I’m really lost. Tried to find friend just friends - nobody. Grow daughter by myself . No relatives to help. I just put everything in God’s hand.
I lost my husband a few years ago too. I’m sorry you also lost your friends. Keep sowing into new friendships, even if it takes so much energy. God does not want you to sit home alone all day and night.
I watched Mum start over 3 times! Once after my father with her 2nd husband. Then after him (no 2). Then she went to Ireland on her own for a year. She came back to UK, to start yet again, she was home for a month then died. She'd been diagnosed with lung cancer in R.O.I. My Mum was FEARLESS. Courageous to the last.
My life turned upside down when my husband of 42 years died. He was my best friend. I still miss him every day but realized for my sake and the sake of my family I had to "put in the work" to grieve and move forward. The Lord was right beside me and I discovered that focusing on service to others, gratitude for what I had . . . . and THRIFTING helped me a lot. I decided I wanted to live a nice frugal life and THRIFTING helped me to make my home cheerful and cozy. Discovering your channel has been a real blessing. You prove that you can decorate beautifully on a budget and I appreciate your wacky side. Thank you! 💐♥️
Thank you so much for being here and sharing your story....I think service to for others is such a rewarding life. It's very tough for me to feel anxious when I am not thinking about myself. It wasn't until I stepped out the circle of myself that I started to grow so much happier and calmer. Going thrifting is so good for me....it takes me back to objects I have not seen in 60 years...it reminds me of people I loved...it turns me on to new painters, artists and designers I never would have discovered...and I meet lovely people there to boot! I have decorated with so many loving finds from the thrift store....and once in a great while I glance over to the men's shirts ad I sigh when I see a special one my husband would have worn...and then I move on..with my camera in tow and my heart in the right place...my love to you and yours, Happy Sunday, Susan & Desi
There is nothing like thrifting.Unknown treasures are wonderful conversational pieces that tell the story of where we have been and where we would like to go.
I’m not 60 yet, but not not only do I not dread it, but you show that a woman can be beautiful at any age. I’m determined to look & be even better in my 60’s than my 50’s. And to enjoy life even more! Thank you!❤🎉
My husband left me 4 years ago this July for a man! This was my 2nd time around with him and I was totally blindsided! Left a note on the kitchen table, 28 years down the drain, now 31, as I am still married because I can't afford a divorce. He is still paying the mortgage but won't get a divorce. I am now 70, gray and fat and I feel used up and abandoned. I have to work part-time to help pay Medicare insurance. I wish I had stayed in South Jersey and never given him a 2nd chance.
its ok sweetie i,l keep u in prayer prayer is the powerhouse keep praying God will undertake for you i hope you are ok an safe you watch God move God bless u sweetie 😊❤🙏🧔♀👵💐
Martna1, you don't need money for a divorce. You can file yourself at the couthouse. You don't need his permission. You say you "feel like a fat old lady". You can't reverse your age, but you can lose weight, which will help you physically and soulfully.
Now you can do what you want to do. You will feel happier as time goes on. Start taking care of you now. Exercising and eating fresh foods will help. Join something you are interested in.
I praise my Heavenly Father for giving you, Little Poet, so much strengh and determination to be HAPPY... which you are achieving graciously and beautifully!!! 💖
🔥🔥Am 51 and I Went through a tough tyme in my early 40s,, Prayers Helped Me, And The Good LORD Showed Me That It was For His Good Purpose, He Taught Me To Leave Every Pain And Burden On His Feet, He Showed Me That Jesus Would Carry me Through, I have learnt, Peace, Love, Joy, Forgiveness,Endurance, Patience, Long Suffering, By Help Of Holy Spirit.. Reading The WORD Of God , And Finding Strength In The LORD...❤
I ask my family for help since I need it, I’ve been sick. They will provide simple tasks and indicate they will. Although, they do nothing! It’s really a shame since I spend day and night alone. The man I live with at 70 works comes home and gets on games every night. Never spends a moment with me. My daughter is in college and indicated she has no time for me. Friends have left since I’m sick…so I live all alone everyday!
I know that being 2x divorced and at 50 yrs, I used to feel shame and humiliation. But NOW, I knew it was diving salvation. I get my moments , of course, but the resonance of inner peace is matchless to what tears meant. My recent divorce was a win not a loss. Thank you for your message at the right time. 🙏🏼💐
Dear Sweet Susan, We all here on your channel are so blessed to have you! You’re an inspiration and hope for us all. I look forward to visiting with you and all the beautiful friends that I found here on your channel at just the right time in my life when I was so lonely. You asked what we did to help when we were in a low point in our lives. I remember during lockdown from covid and trying to work from home and take care of my elderly mother I gave up on myself. No makeup wearing pajamas all day I’m sure some days I didn’t even brush my hair I just put it up in a clip. I remember sitting at my little makeup table thinking what happened to ‘me’ where did I go? In a little dish on the table was some pretty aqua blue earrings and I thought today I’m going to wear my earrings. And every time I looked in the mirror I’d see those beautiful little earrings dangling and it make me feel more like me. So the next day I put lipstick on with my earrings and each day I took a little time to add back something I did for me. I sounds silly but it made me feel better and got me to remember how the little things we do for ourselves no one else mean so much. We love and appreciate you thank you so much. Love always, Donna
I so understand what you are saying. I also took care of my mom and many days I would just pull my hair back in a ponytail, washed face and that was it.
My mom had to start over when my dad left her and it was so hard. I felt so bad for her. She had never worked a day in her life so she was terrified. Thank you for this. I wish my mom could have seen it. Love to you Susan. Melissa
Hello sweet Melissa! Oh I thought of you when I was thinking back on my early years ( I know yours were very tough too)...my Mom so distant and alone...terrible apartments and crying. I looked around and the walls were so bleak..I vowed when I grew up I wanted to make everything pretty. Your home is a masterpiece and your taste is exquisite in everything from makeup, clothes to furnishings...and you also have a great sense of humor...you make me laugh...your Tom Ford spoof is one of my favorites...your beautiful spirit will always soar...like you were born to make people happy. xxoo Sues
@Melissa55 same thing happened to my mom, I was 8 years old when my dad left her and us 3 kids, it was a very sad and hard life growing up, I miss my mom.🙏🏻❤️
@@BlingyBea Me too, My mom had nothing, when my dad left. I remember all the crying and how hard her life was, but she was a hard worker in the end she bought a house! She worked her way up in the world. It's so hard as a child to see your parent so sad and struggling.
@@kimlinford3484 same here, my mom had always been a housewife with only a 3rd grade education, she worked in a cleaners as a presser all her life, we had to move in with my grandparents, she did everything for us three kids and she never remarried, I miss her everyday, she passed 8 years ago at 90 years old.❤️🙏🏻
Beautiful video. Thank you so much for creating it. I left my marriage 33 years ago. I sometimes look back and wonder what my life would have become. And then I realize that I wouldn’t be me if I had stayed.
I've been dumped plenty of times in my life but I did my share of dumping partners too. This made me finally consider how my X's that I left felt. It awoke the compassion in me. I'm alone with my cat & 74 now and have convinced myself that that's just fine.
Yes I've spent my life turning nothing into beauty...💐 I'm an expert at starting over however when my mother passes (I am currently her sole caregiver) I will have no family...This will be a very different kind of starting over ..I never dreamed that at 66 I would be without family...😞 My goal is to move to Costa Rica and grow a medicinal herb garden since I won't be able to depend on Amazon for my supplements haha and everyday watch the sunset... What always helps me is crying, singing, dancing, journaling, creative self expression. ..but it's never easy...
The bad times pass...they always do . We realize we are so much more braver, stronger, wiser than we ever dreamed . I became a widow at 43 ,I'am 72 now, and I have survived and life is good. We change grow,and roll with punches. Love your positive take on life and all the good advice and tips
This month will be the 4th anniversary of my husband's death. After he died I found out he was cheating on me. He was 65 seeing a woman in her 40's with 3 teenagers. What was he thinking? She was only taking to him to get money. He found this out and had a heart attack, died 30 hrs later. I wad so mad, my God took care of him. Done even think about him anymore. I feel bad for my kids, they didn't deserve this!!! Hope you move on.
After my divorce 14 yrs ago, i stopped watching all the shows i loved , the medical, lawyer and cop shows, and just watched comedy, and thats pretty well all I watch these days, i need the laughter, the lightness, the no brainer entertainment. After all these years, i still dont know where im going, but im selling this run down house, selling and donating everything that doesnt fit on one pallet, and will leave this town, this island and this country and will start a new adventure. I cant wait !!!
My husband died in 2016 after being ill and I was a caregiver and many other job titles as well. I had to face many new things at age 57. I never thought I’d still be living in the home we built and shared for 30 years. However, I’m still here and the memories are so strong. My faith and reading the Bible helped me through so much. So many don’t realize what a huge loss it is unless they’ve experienced it. A friend, a lover, your children’s father, and your shoulder to lean on are gone forever. Can’t wait for your anniversary video. It’ll be awesome I know.
Cheryl, SO SORRY for your loss .I KNOW exactly how you feel as I also lost my husband. It will be 7 years ago this June and I still cry for him. As you said, No one will ever really understand what it is like to lose your spouse who played so many countless roles in your life. I wish you well and God's Blessings of strength and comfort as you walk through these years. I share your faith in believing through God's Word that we will be reunited one day. Thank You, Jesus !!!!!
@@pattyallen5313 oh thank you Patty. My husband, Larry, passed in the month of June also. I am sorry for your great loss as well. I am so grateful that I had 32 years with him. We will be reunited with them one day. Thanks for your kindness. God bless you. 🙏🇺🇸
Another wonderful video . . You shine, my friend. My ex just walked out, when I was 57. I'll be 72 in September. it was rough, not going to lie. I dated a bit and had one very comfortable and promising relationship; however it was not to be. I still struggle with whether or not I even want a man at this point. I like being in control of my life and doing what I want. I'd like more gal pals!
I'm trying to remember in my 20's when I was struggling with the ability to hold a job cause I was always crying. [Depression] What got me through was my mom's smile. Her constant reminders that your going to be ok. It will happen was her reminder. It did. My God if she only knew how I'm doing. God Bless her soul. 🙏
Winston Churchill stated, "Never,Never,Never,Never Give Up." I like the saying and it helps me. For all the loss I experienced, I got everything I lost back and I am stronger for the experience.
My Mom had a saying, "Things could never be so bad that they couldn't get worse."I had a friend who was so negative that I had to break up with her. She would go on a cruise and complain about everything about it.Negative people love to drag us down.Your Spirit is so uplifting,people must love to be around you.
When my husband died a couple of years ago, I felt so lonely and sad 😥, but with God's help I have made it! I have 2 knees that need replaced, but I have to lose 40 pounds and it is very hard to do when you can barely walk, but I have hope and that keeps me going..Love you sweet gal ❤
I had knee replacement … kept putting it off but the pain keeps you awake at night and we need our sleep. Do something good for yourself and talk with a dietitian and they can help you loose that weight….I know, been there and done that. God be with you and best of luck! You can do this!!
I have osteoporosis and am on a cane, but I changed my diet got rid of anything with added sugar, removed grains from my diet and slowly loosing weight. It can be done.
Susan, you are just getting more beautiful every year. I think it’s because you are happy and secure with yourself. I think I know how you feel because I divorced after 41 years! I was miserable for the last 20 of those years but stayed because of my children. It was scary to leave but I loved being on my own and free from all that conflict and worry. It cost me a lot in many ways but almost 10 years later, I’ve met someone who loves me, holds me and we live with no worry or conflict. Just love. I will never feel insecure and scared again even if I find myself alone again. We are strong women.
I'm going through divorce now - very hard but I know I deserve better - someone that is loving and has empathy. My ex was narcissistic to extreme. Glad I'm on my healing journey now. I do miss the companionship of having someone to do things with. How do you meet someone when you are older? Where do you meet a decent man? Seems they are all selfish these days.
Whenever I feel a bit sad or just fed up there is a saying that motivates me. “Every journey begins with that first step”. Helps me get out of bed and move on. Xx.
Omg how crazy. When you first said the goal.......as I listen with never ending it seems tears.......in my head I said my goal is to "not cry" and then you said it 😱 so wow bittersweet to know I'm not alone. I just turned 60 in October. Divorced since 2015 and recent break up with someone I dated the last couple years. Damnit I just can't become okay with being alone 🤷🙄. Why? I mean I stay busy to keep my brain occupied but when I sit to break or rest I hate it. I hate the silence. I hate eating alone. I have never even went out to eat by myself. I just want a husband a partner a companion. This feels uncomfortable. Being alone just feels lonely 😭. Maybe I should get a puppy. Maybe I should drink more wine 🍷 ugh. Thank you for letting me vent on your comments you're so sweet 💖
Hi Susan, I've been binge watching your videos, especially the ones on starting over. I'm 65 and am raising my 7 yr old granddaughter. Listening to each video makes me want to take notes, so I don't forget the amazing wisdom you have shared. I'm still married but am filing for a divorce. He has been verbally abusive and emotionally and physically neglectful. I'm just tired of the empty life I lived. You have been so encouraging and insightful I feel that I can take this leap of faith and get out. Starting over is what is in my head and I see myself in my own apt. living the way I want not according to him. Thank you for sharing your struggles, strengths and victory's. I feel I have a chance for a new life. Hugs to you and Desi!!!
I found you about a month ago. I wish I had found you seven years ago!! My husband left me after 47 years of marriage for a younger woman. I also lost my mom and dad unexpectedly earlier the same year. To say I was Devastated is an under statement! I knew I wanted to be happy again. My dad always asked me if I was happy. He said that’s the most important thing! I wanted so bad to be happy. I made sure I had plans every weekend. Sometimes I dreaded the upcoming weekend all week but I made myself do it! I still remember meeting two friends for Lunch and it hit me. I was happy for the first time in several years. It’s been 7 years and I still fret over why. But my word for the year is toward. And I try everyday to look forward and not dwell on the past. Thank you for your reminders! You give me the drive to keep working toward my happiness! My Daddy would be proud!
Dearest Susan, I was so happily surprised yesterday when, in my shock, I shared about losing my darling Angel, a buff Tabby. AND YOU ANSWERED!?! And this community listened and you all cared. 💗 Thank you x 1000! I was young when I got divorced, 25. I felt like I was going to implode. WHAT HELPED ME THEN was to set milestones. 1Day, 1 Week, 1 Month, 1Year. I kept a journal(kinda), I embroidered & framed The Serenity Prayer and I believed that God, and my friends had something better for me. I felt it was out there. JUST one foot in front of the other. A day, A week, A month and A year at a time...letting those emotions, struggles, triumphs and fears flow on to the paper. It all started to take on the presence of a watercolor, or fall together like a lyric to a melody. Your genuinely sincere demeanor helps us through. Today was A Day since I lost my little Angel. It has been hard, tears come easy and I can imagine touching her incredibly soft fur. It would drift on a breeze if I held a bit up to the sky. Like this community, I will hold her in my heart, and each week spend a few minutes lovingly remembering My Angel Bug. With all of you to laugh & cry with. I will get through. Never did I think an online community would be this real. But it is, and Susan, you are the Highpriestess of Hopefulness. 😘😢🐾🌈⚘
I want to just hug you...your baby was so pretty...I loved the pictures! I am so sorry you are sad...it is just devastating to lose a pet...part of our family,,,,, part of us. It is my honor to talk to you and know of your life. We gals have to stick together....xxoo May your weekend be peaceful and full of good memories...love to you and yours, Susan
@@LittlePoet She was a beauty to be sure. I found some fur in her brush, and taped a bit into each card that came along with the paw print we got at the Vets office. It was truly like silk, in both denier and texture! Her fur was her crowning glory...her temper was her sore spot. Just proving to us all that being loved is possible without being perfect!
20:40 "where women are right now". I'm set to retire in one year and I have no friends to socialize with. For the past 35 years, I've been working, raising a son, keeping a house, caring for pets and elderly parents. And now at 60 yrs old, no friends. Is it possible to make new friends at 60 yrs old?
Yes. I have moved twice since retiring. I am a joiner, so I joined a church, clubs and volunteered. I do things that I want to do trips, theater,movies etc. I sometimes meet people, I sometimes don't but I have an interesting experience. My conversation is more interesting, I enjoy new places and things and get to see new places. It sure is better than being bored, lonely and stagnant
I wonder the same thing! I’m too much of an introvert! I had close friends (some of them died) but some just didn’t stick around during the years I gave care to my husband. So here I am all alone and wondering if life is worth all the trouble. I have grown sons and grown grandchildren but they don’t have time for an old woman. And I never tell them how I’m feeling either. Now on a happy note I do have a wonderful 3 year old doggie who is the absolute love of my life.
Yes, you are at the beginning of a new adventure! There are always people that need a friend. Put on a smile and join other like minded people and you will meet friends.
@@Paula-xp7ve Kids shouldn't have to be told that their mother needs some attention. I'm sure you had time for them as you were raising them, so now it's your turn. But we get overlooked as we get older. Dogs are very loyal and will stick by us. We are never too old for our dogs and they bring so much to our lives. I am also an introvert and it is hard to meet others as we get older. Hang in there!!
I used the occasion to work with my 4 children, theirs spouses...my grandchildren, helping to transition with dignity, family respect intact. 10 yrs.passed now and I feel Marvelous. The grandkids are having kids an I am ready to make a great thing. Its a good feeling having respectfully taken care of Bussines.
You always know how I feel and give me exactly what I need to hear, so thank you so much for being there for me. My husband and I were High School sweethearts. We married though in 1995. We were married almost 26 years until my husband passed away from cancer. Since that time I have been trying to heal.
Oh Cynthia I am so deeply sorry you lost your dear husband last year. I am comforting knowing you had so many years with a man you loved so deeply...and that is a small consolation now in your time of healing...but I see it. I am sending you well wishes and prayers....thank you so much for being here, Susan
Hello Susan, I have had to reinvent myself quite a few times. I have always been a strong woman. I'm now 63 and have been living the high life...haha, for 18yrs. My second husband died when I was 45. My son was on his own and I was so ready for an adventure, so he got my home and I got an apartment, changed jobs and moved away from my home town. It's been interesting to say the least. I got arrested for defending myself against a bully. Don't fret, the charges were dismissed and my reputation restored. I've had to retire last October, due to sever arthritis, and I just finished paying off my mini home, sold my other home to my son.He got a deal...lol I too have a dog, Sir Simon Wigglebutte. My greatest love .. So I know how to get er done. Yes, I like living alone and being retired is a learning curve for sure. I Never gave it a thought that I couldn't make it...Just knew I could do it. Oh, I had my moments, yet I had ME and I know ME. What a lovely surprise to finally discover how unlonely being alone can be. Ellen Burstyn What I'm having some issue with is my disability. It's making me mad that I can't do all the things I was so looking forward to doing once I retired. So, I'm back to having to reinvent me again. I was a nurse all my life.....Being a patient isn't going to be something I will adapt to easily. You give Desi a scratch for me. God Bless you Susan.
🥳🥳MAZEL TOV!!!!! 7 YEARS!! How wonderful!! and you are more beautiful everyday!! I know it has been a long hard road but the truth is you are truly amazing and you have really created a beautiful life for your self and an amazing community of women are here every week to celebrate with you because of your sweetness and transparency and desire to help women get back on their feet. The one thing I do when I find myself having my own person pity party is to get up, take a shower and get outside because it just helps to re-direct my emotions. I go to an antique or thrift shop and find some pretty things to look at. I stay gone until my mood has changed and I have left the pity party behind me. After all, "It could always be worse"!!! Love to you and Gangsta Dez 💝
Thank you, currently going through a breakup and turning 60 in a few days. Throughout this relationship I have lost my self worth, my confidence, I have lost ME.
I can relate to that. I hv been with my husband for 34 years. just found out he has been gambling for at least the past year. I am 67 and not in good health. this channel feels like a life line
Bless you Darling. You can cope! You won’t see it now. Tomorrow next month or even next year. But you will. Time is a good healer.I’ve been in my own 14 months now. My Husband left me after 35 years. I wanted to die, I tried to take my own life. But God didn’t want me in his world yet. He won’t want you either Darling. What I believe now is this. If someone can come along n take him from me he wasn’t mine in the first place. He was weak. But I’m strong. Us Ladies are strong. We have to be. God Bless you. Think of all the good you have in your life. Is this man worthy of uou. No he’s not. Xxx
Get mad. Anger will move you forward. It is very motivating. Then over time, you will settle into a calmness. That's how I coped with it. I now live in a little place by the seaside retired. I didn't need him. That is the amazing thing.......you don't need him.
@@MyMaria1224 I still love my Husband now. But would I take him back no. You won’t see it now lovely but in time you’ll remember this message n think this woman was right. You take care of yourself .
I kicked him out 7 years ago. He was an alcoholic and a jobless bum. He didn't want me to work because that meant he wasn't a "man" 🙄. I planned everything with the assistance of a DV counselor, as far as the laws, as what I could and couldn't do. All the bills had cut off notices and I had no job, but I had my house, that's all I needed. I have a wonderful friend who gave me the money to keep my lights on until I found a job. I never looked back and have never been happier. Best decision I ever made, should have made it sooner. Thank you so much for your video Susan.
I used to say it could have been worse. It got me through a lot of bad times. Then, 4 years ago, the worse actually happened; I lost my daughter, my only child, to cancer. Now I say. I got through (if that's possible) the worst thing that could happen.
Now, at age 65, I help to raise her daughters (16 and 18) because their dad could not get through the worst thing that happened to him. I help my granddaughters learn to grow up to be strong, independent women. That is my gift to my daughter.
I try to keep my old sense of humor that my daughter loved so much. I continued to work every day until I retired, 5 months ago (that was hard).
So, my "starting over" was learning how to live without my daughter. I had to struggle with questions like "am I still a mom if I no longer have a child" and what it will it be like to never hear someone say, "hey mom" ever again. I had to learn to listen attentively to my friends talk about their adult children and not be angry or jealous that they are still moms.
Now, my "things could be worse" affirmations are: thank God for my beautiful granddaughters; they give me a reason to live and be happy again.
I guess we all start over in our own way after various events and phases of our lives.
Love your videos; they always make me think and smile.
Thank you!
Hello Dawn, thank you so much for being here. I read your words twice over. I did cry...i am so deeply sorry for your loss. What an amazing gift to your daughter, yourself, and your two girls that they know you as a Mother/Grandmother figure...and oh how they must love you so deeply. Your words touched my heart so much and allowed me to see that loss comes in many ways and how we cope with it may be less important than our will to live the best way we can for ourselves and for others. Turning our sorrow and anxiety into action and purpose. Your words will stick with me long after today...I hope I am so lucky to see you here again. Your heart is so beautiful....xo Love to you and your girls, Susan & Dez
Lost my 17 year old son to Leukemia. I am one of the few that truly understand what its like. One foot in front of the other - years go by - then decades and finally you can smile and laugh when you remember your child. But have I healed - NO. There's still a whole, but I have learned how to live again and enjoy the present. Sending prayers your way.
❤❤❤❤❤
Lost my son 21 devastating got divorced at 44 now 79. I guess I learned to be a strong 💪 person left with nothing. Now have a house. Just retired from Wall Street. Living my life with beautiful memories of my son. And have beautiful daughter and grandchildren. Stay strong ladies. Life’s not easy 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏❤️🥰you start over because that’s life.
@@geraldinebowbia5176 I am so very sorry for the loss of your child. God bless you.
Not all storms come to disrupt your life,some come to clear your path
What a thought provoking quote, Love it ☀️
Wow. What a profound true statement. Thank you.
I have read that quote, and that is so true!!
I love that perspective.
That's beautiful. Love it.
At 65 starting over yet again. God help me. I am thankful for my health, my job, my income, my car and my new 2 bedroom apartment overlooking the city. Thank you God, my help comes from the Lord.
Amen
🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
Romans 8:28 sustains me - praying for you 🙏
Gratitude is everything ..we are all very privileged..we are not living in poverty in 3rd world countries!
Best to you !
Just finished my divorce and it is such a peaceful time. No one yelling at me, no one hurting me, and yet life is scary. I am trying to be better.
God bless you
I hope you'll seek Jesus for these needs. He has held me and provided for me so many times.
я желаю Вам счастья ,радости и побольше впечатлений.
Men do not yell for no reason! One has to wonder what you did tomcause that reaction!
@@LWRCRight, just like a woman "makes" a 'man' (you're really no man, just a male) hit her. Get your abu&ive axx on. Literally get out of here. Why are you here??? This channel? The planet?? Don't you have some Red Pill content you could be choking on? Go
Trying to start over myself. He & I were together 34 years, that was 10 years ago. He is remarried to his lover and I am still lost and alone. This year I am going to live a wonderful life and find my joy and happiness again.
I was a month short of my 60th birthday when my ex husband threw me out without a job or savings. I bounced from house to house for 4 months....but now 5 1/2 years later...I have NO REGRETS
Why didn't you take him to the divorce court??
My husband left me for a younger woman age 45 after a 25 year marriage. He had been a headteacher but he left me penniless and homeless. I am also blind. God helped me and I discovered that I had some amazing friends. I also discover that some friends weren’t friends at all. One thing that helped me was getting up early and going out - just to say hello. I got a job and rebuilt my life, my job was a huge help. I also learned to go out and eat alone in places where I didn’t feel uncomfortable - this was a big help. The biggest thing that helped me, however, was to accept that my husband wasn’t coming back. Now I am so glad he didn’t! Thank you for your channel. ❤️
Divorced at 61 and started completely over.
Scared as hell but new I did the best thing for me.
I’m free from the hell the narcissist put me through.
Happy, healthy and doing very well.
Só do i…. After 16 years in a “ mariage” só abusiv, FAKE . Disrespectuble
Good for you, and Jesus loves you!
Narcissistic men, me too.
What the hell! He just a week ago told me he wanted a divorce. 48 years married and for what.
@@cats2ish no one seems to know how to stick it out with one woman any more.....men have thousands of young women to look at and chat with on the internet in SO many ways....it is tearing families apart
@@cats2ish women do the same terrible things to men. There are narcissist women too, and lots of them. Keep an open mind.
Hello! My husband left me after 43 years of marriage. It was very hard for me I cried all the time! My two daughters helped me through it! I prayed a lot too! It’s been 3 years now and I thank God every day. I have so much peace in my life now and I am truly blessed! God bless you !
Same here!!!!!!!!!!
How are you now? My sincerest love and prayers are with you 🙏
God bless you
Thanking God is the best way to do it!. I'm having a bad divorce day today, but I will just keep saying "Thank you Lord" until I feel better, and remember, it could be much worse.
I'm divorcing my husband of 40 years, and I never felt better.
I am 57,single,live alone and I have never been as content as I am now, being manless is the best thing ever. My whole life revolved around my significant other,I couldn't bear the thought of being alone. I wish I had realized how happy I would be without a man in my life. Ladies most men just drag us down,life is so wonderful without a man. Men don't want romance,women do. Men want variety,women want one good man. These are the facts. Ladies you are worth so much,a man should lift you up. If he doesn't drop him like a bad habit.
I totally agree 👍
OMG you are speaking right to me tonight.....I feel I need a man to make my life complete...I miss my 20 year long marriage....I was alone for 13 years then I fell in love with this guy who has abused me and used me horribly for the past 2 years and I can't leave him .....I just love him so much ..i don't know why....he is horrible to me....I mean horrible.......yet I keep begging for his love and attention.....I don't live with him so that is a help.....but he is a player for sure and needs variety .....but all I want is HIM....he is killing me every day.....now I have stage 4 cancer and he doesn't even know......I beg for his scraps.....it is so sick and sad ....I feel pathetic
@artsylady3187 if your partner/man is so horrible, why do you stay with him even for one more minute??? Just grab your Toothbrush and go.
may I suggest that you, as a woman, are not in a position to speak about "what men want". men want love and romance and togetherness and happiness. Just because you had a bad marriage does not make all men bad and selfish just as it doesn't make all women bad and selfish. It is wonderful that you are happy alone and that you "don't need a man", but telling women that "men don't want romance. Men want variety" is a distorted and harsh judgment call on your part. I can assure you that for every man "looking for variety", there is a woman looking for variety too.
@@explorermike19💯% Agree!
I'm just about to turn 50. Last year, after a violent incident, and losing our family home, I left my marriage of 16 years, with my 16 y/o daughter. We left with only the clothes we stood up in, and my estranged husband being in and out of County jail, facing many pending criminal charges. Thanks to the grace of my many friends (and strangers), I resolved to take my new life day-by-day (moment by moment, if I had to). Things are getting better. We now have our own apartment, that is safe, secure, and fills regularly with sunshine. We both feel beyond blessed. Thank-you for sharing your wisdom and insight. We are all on a journey.
We've gotta laugh 😃
God bless you x You’re so brave and now with a peaceful base - your new home, you can start planning your future x 🙏🏻
Never look back, one foot in front of the other. Head up. Positive thoughts. You both will do great 👍
My husband went through some kind of mid life crisis and decided he did not want be married anymore after 26 years. I did not see it coming and was heart broken. I loved him very much. I was also 60. It has been 6 yrs now and I am a stronger, more independent person. Women are survivors and we are more powerful than we think we are.
I’m so sorry that happen to you. It’s been 6mo for me. I hope everything is better for you
Amen. Amen. Amen
I was 55 at the time of my divorce and it took me about 3 years before I didn't cry at least once a day. One day I realized I hadn't cried at all for a couple of days and now I can't remember the last time I cried. I think that's ok.
Amén
I think that's great!
EncourGing! Thank you ❤
I'm starting over because my husband passed. It happened during Covid quarantine. I'm paralyzed, confused, disorganized... so alone.
I can't go through boxes, I can't open mail. I live in 2 rooms, in a 4 bedroom house. But, I am making progress.
I'm trying to make new friends, reconnect with old friends, even those far away.
One day at a time...
You worded this so well. Hope you are thriving now a year later
Iam so sorry Mariansmith76 please find support so that you can get through this
Thank you for a lovely video as usual. You are an inspiration. l was divorced after 55 years of marriage but not an angry situation. It was fair - l got the house he got the income. We never fought afterwards. Pushing 80 l sold the house, moved to another country l could afford, bought a new place and love the people here and the wonderful expats l have met. Every day is an adventure learning the language and never have been sorry for one minute. It has been 3 years and l am so happy. Needless to say many people were shocked at my action but now want to visit.
I find your comment VERY inspirational. I'm nearly 66 and hate where I live and am in the slow process of preparing to move out. I'm thinking of moving to another city which I think might suit my personality more.
Where I'm living is very aggressive and rough. The new city has a reputation for being friendly and artistic and polite - all my styles, so hopefully I get there and find a better fit.
All I want is a peaceful kind place where I can set up a home just the way I like it and pursue my artistic practice, do some writing and hopefully meet some people with common interests and kind personalities.
Good for you.
You are very brave.
Just curious what country you moved to.
Wow, where did you move to?
@@mwhappy24 By the largest lake in Mexico.
A line from Shakespeare, I think King Lear, is that when we say things are the worst, they are not. when things are truly the worst, we will not know it! I was left in our countryside home with 2 young children, no car!, by an alcoholic husband. Who also had a girlfriend. I had the support of both sides of the family and a 4 year degree + teaching certification. I was heart broken and my best friend sent me a card that said on the journey, I would emerge on the other side of a bridge- not sure if how I got there, but would never want to go back. It proved so true when I saw things as they really are. I found out how much resolve I had!! Daughters grew up great- they have good mates. One daughter is a chiropractor and other a lawyer. With FIRST QUALITY HEARTS!!
When a man doesn't want you or want you anymore, respect yourself enough to accept it and don't cry over it, he's not crying over it, he's excited to start life without you.
Sad but true
While I appreciate your attitude, when a woman is devastated, and she just craves for him to still want her, that's going to take some of us time to overcome. Not crying over it will come later. Thanking God the loser left will come later. But for now...some of us need to let our broken heart cry. 🙂
If only ever time something bad happened werl could just get over it. If only it was that black and white. Give me someone who is vulnerable, authentic and honest than Ms Sunshine Positivity.
Crying is therapeutic 😊
Cry, but understand that God will make things okay. You can move forward
He doesn't want to be there while the grass looks greener but when he realizes it's turf and he needs you he comes crawling back. I wish women would stop running to their rescue. Two of my friend's fathers did the same thing and when they got sick the mothers took care of them after they left them cheated on them and treated them badly in the marriages
As a 71 year old woman starting over was hard I was 55 when my husband died from a massive stroke and I’m still in recovery because everyday there is something new so I say to those of you who’s watching and reading you can make it just awaken each morning thanking God YOU are able to see another day and keep progressing. From Texas
God bless you I do that every morning
Cynthia I can relate to you my dear my husband passed away 11 years ago and I still shed a tear drop for him everyday !
I’m 70 years and really feel that I’m just waiting to pass away sometimes, I’m very active and my daughter lives with me with her beautiful Swiss white shepherd . But deep down in my heart I know my life will never be the same with out my husband . Praise God I’m a Christian , without the lord in my life I know i wouldn’t make day to day ! Im sending a prayer your way my sister in Christ , God Bless You 🙏🏻❤️🇺🇸
My husband passed away 14 years ago and I still think of him every day. I will be 61 in a few weeks and I’m still trying to figure this life out.
I am 73 and lost my husband 14 years ago. I miss him every day. I understand how you feel. A great guy married me. He was and is my life's greatest blessing. I wish you calm and peace...until you meet again.
I will think of you during my morning walk. God bless 🙏💞
I had to start over at 40 my husband left me for his mistress. And later married her. Lesson I learned is it doesn’t matter how pretty you are how good you are men can decide to go. So I became very independent and strong and slowly re built my life. I find everyone changes as they get older and we want different things.
I am a 59 year old guy 2 years out of divorce from the woman I always thought was the love of my life.
I just found your channel. I realize it is intended to be for women. I hope you don’t mind that I watch your videos.
But I have to say…how on this earth is a woman as beautiful and sweet and funny and….and…and…..there just arent enough good things to say about you. But how are you still single??? How is that possible??? There must be a long line of men at your door vying for your attention. I hope that one day the right one finds you and treats you with all the love and respect that you deserve. You are really something. It breaks my heart to hear you talk about crying. Women like you should never cry. EVER!!!
Keep the videos coming. I enjoying hearing your voice and energy.
some females are knockouts and smart....bad luck do strike upon the best of the best....l know all too well
Two things help me: a short list of good decisions I'd made, like buying my car, and, when I just feel lousy I think of another lousy time-- that I'd gotten past, of course then I can tell myself "you won't always feel this way. All I had to do was replace "divorce " with "life altering illness " for our stories to be so similar. What you've shared translates to every unplanned life change. I know God led me to your channel. At 61 I'm sitting in a physical rehabilitation recovering from multiple illness, including a stroke. Life may never be the same, but I do believe it can be even better. Thanks 🎉
Raised three beautiful children in Maryland, lost my grocery store, ended up in a homeless shelter in California. Threw my pity party for so long but things are turning around. Now I know my true friends. Awesome Susan.
A very happy weekend to you Caro! i am so glad you made it!! Love Always, Susan & Dez
@@LittlePoet Thanks Dez. You always put a smile in my heart. Remind me of Blue,, my poodle. Miss him.
@@LittlePoet ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Yes you learn quickly who your true friends are in times of adversity
That's how you find out who your true friends are.
Two things have changed my life and saved my life. First, meditation. I went through a period of high anxiety, including panic attacks. Meditation and an excellent teacher saved my life and I’ve never suffered from anxiety again. The other thing that has saved my life recently was having put in place medical authority and power of attorney a few years ago. In late September I had an outpatient surgery that ended me being in the hospital for nearly 2 months, including nearly 3 weeks in the ICU, intubated and in an induced coma. I cannot count on family to help nor make the right decisions for me. Thank goodness I chose these 3 people so well. When I was discharged my surgeon told me that he never saw 3 friends works so well together in their friend’s interest. When I woke up I knew I had a new life and that I was alive thanks to my friends love and support throughout. ❤
Lucky you, hope I can count on one friend in my time of need.
Divorce is difficult.
I went through 2 of them !
But life goes on and I moved on .
Thank goodness for friends !
😊
Just celebrated 30 years of marriage today. He is such a good man. Woke up to flowers and a mushy card. I am grateful for him and to him for giving us a wonderful daughter. I am 70 now and hope nothing changes our love for one another. I wish everyone out there a loving and good life.
You are Blessed ❤
Sounds exactly like my life. Till it wasn’t.
Congratulations I guess some people never do find mr. Or Mrs. Right 😅
Wishing you every happiness!
Your husband was a complete and utter schmuk to let go such a lovely lady such as you. I'm confident he will always regret it. I know I don't know you personally but I'm so proud of how you turned your life around. You are truly an inspiration x
Is it possible you don't have the full story of why there relationship dissolved?
I have a wonderful husband, but at present, we're going through a rough patch. After a hysterectomy about 12 years ago, and getting older, I find sex to be VERY painful. So, I just don't care for it. Really, I don't have any desire for it, but he does. 😞 To boot, he is a noisy, restless sleeper (snoring, gasping, sometimes screams at night, and at times twitchy, although a heavy sleeper, and I suffer from insomnia. So, I don't like to sleep with him. We're both missing that intimacy we used to have when we first got married. So, all that is taking a toll on our marriage. We're living like roommates rather than husband and wife. He's very unhappy, and I'm unhappy that he's unhappy. I swore that I would never mention the "d" word, but lately...well I don't know. I hope we find a way to patch things up. 😞
@marialeach8960 do your best to work it out. Sex is a compromise for both partners, but sex or at least intimacy is important at every age. Fill the sex gaps with lots of other kinds of assuring intimacy like cuddling, massages (doesn't have to be sexual massage), kind words, doing special things for each other. Look into sexual activities that don't require actual intercourse.
Research how you might alleviate your sex pain with methods or positions or lubrication. Chances are, his sex drive is slowing down or will slow down. Probably he doesn't want SEX as much as he just doesn't want to be rejected by you. When you reject his sexual advances, it is hurtful to him.
As for his sleeping noises, it sounds like he might have sleep apnea which can be treated. He might also have anxiety which can be helped professionally.
Seek help with professional counselors and doctors instead of lawyers. The cure for the problems you describe are easier to fix and have better results than divorce. Divorce really sucks.
Maria, I am so sorry for your pain. I too have suffered with loss of intimacy because of the pain (married 41 years). Maybe you should check out hormone replacement therapy? There’s an MD on RUclips who explains everything in detail called Menopause Barbie. Because of the education I got from her, I started back on hormones and even though I am 62, sex is at last no longer painful. It was terrible and sad to lose that closeness with my husband too. I pray you are able to get the help you need. Take care.
@@lisa-4770 Thank you. I will check that out. God Bless!
I was married for 27 1/2 years. My husband decided to marry someone he had an affair with at work. We had just built a log home and he was going to retire from there. I started over, losing that home and having to move to another area of the state to get a job and support myself. I had to reinvent myself. Thank you for sharing your life with all of us.
Just think.....they both cheated on you....then got married......wonder which of them will have an affair on each other........js
Congratulations Connie....you broke free! I am sorry you had to go through that initial pain but thank goodness you are done with him. Thank you so much for sharing your story with us....you are beautiful!!! You are free! xxoo Happy weekend!!! Susan & Dez
@@sirtedricwalker2979 so true
God bless you on your journey. You are worth it.
Thank you for sharing your story of victory. I got hit by a car and in recovery am thinking about what I will do once I’m walking again. Better relationships. I wish you true happiness.
I moved 9 times since my divorce 11 years ago. I am so tired of moving and starting over but I am blessed to get to start over and not have to answer to anyone.
Me too I moved alot, awful situation could not settle, still don't feel I belong were I am..I wish you well for your future..UK
"and not have to answer to anyone." That's it right there. My life is mine. Finally. Mine.
Thank you for the encouragement. I too am over 60. And after 30 years of marriage find myself starting over. It’s good to know that the sun will shine once more in the future.
I hope the sun will shine for me too. After 33 years of being married I was told he didn't love me any more and said he knew I had a one night fling 12 years ago which I never had. This and for other reasons I believe he as dementia but I can't prove it. I am sorry for him but I can't live this way. I don't have any money but where do I start? No friends or family. I feel lost.
@@patbowman6723 I'm with you.. I'm where you are also.. God bless us all who are facing this..
My husband is divorcing me after almost 39 years of marriage. He feels he deserves to be happy and is hoping to find a young women to date(good luck with that). I’m just trying to stay strong for my kids and grandkids. It affects us all. I’m so thankful I have the assurance that God is my protector and will get me through this heartbreaking divorce. 😢
@@conniesolano7549 I'm with you! 37 yrs here! Just poof, he's gone. Moved 13 hrs away.. but we're stronger than we think! We got this, let's show our babies and grand babies what a strong blood line they come from!! Love to you & God bless.
Lil B thank you for your encouraging words! I needed to hear them.
I went through a lot of financial crisis during my divorce, I had to raise my two kids alone, Currently I'm living smart and frugal with my money. Bought my second house already. Saving and investing lifestyle made it possible for me; even till now I earn monthly through passive income. I'm planning on retiring when my kids finish college..
I'm a single dad. Not quite long I started investing. I'm very curious and need help on how to enhance and increase my returns. Any good investment tips would be appreciated
@Puneet Jajoo JR That’s great , your investment advisor must be really good,I have seen testimonies of people using the help of investment advisors in making them more financial stable. Do you mind sharing more info on this person?
@Puneet Jajoo JR Just got out of my marriage,I have had the intentions of starting investing. But I always thought it was late and I think I need to stop procrastinating. I will definitely 🔍 Regina Louise Collaro and see what she can advise .Thanks a lot . This was of so much help to me .
@Puneet Jajoo JR You are right, I am one of many who has benefited from investing with Regina Louise Collaro. 2020 is an unforgettable year in my life, back then I lost my job due to covid, my marriage and had no reason to live. Regina made a good life possible for me through passive income and I owe her my life. To be honest, I feel like she is an angel of who was sent to help those who are suffering financially.
Yay you! If only I could stop going out for those Texas Margaritas! LOL
I was married once and was so in love. One day he left without saying anything to me. I was devastated. I cried every single day and felt horrible. I had anxiety and panic attacks. I sold my home and moved to two small rooms in my parent home in the basement. It was so sad and depressing for me. I used to go running every night after work and all I Did was cry and cry some more. One night after my run I came to my small apartment, and I was mad with God and asked Him why I was not getting help from Him. I was so exhausted from crying, and I dropped on my sofa. I felt the voice of God saying to me, how can I help you if you never stay quiet enough to hear me. After that night my life change drastically, and I was happy for the first time in month. That is part of my journey.....today Iam happy and look forward to a new day.................thanks for sharing your story and for allowing me to shared part of mine................until........................MUCH LOVE, MINDY
Mindy, isn't it wonderful when we learn to communicate with God. When your loved one leaves , it is just like death. Been there. Blessings for you. 🌹❤️
@@patsyjohnson3963 Thank you so much. How sweet of you to reached out.
Bless you🙏🏻❤️
Mindy that’s awesome!! My husband has stage 4 cancer and not doing well. I have accepted he will pass away and my life will be vastly different. Of course I can’t really know until it happens how I will handle things but I do think about it often. I pray that I can continue to find happiness and reasons to smile. You sharing your story has encouraged me. Thank you.
@@alifeblessed2218 Reached out to me please.
Suzan, because you have given me the strength to do so..... I have an appointment with a divorce lawyer next week. After 45 years of marriage.... I am ready to live my life. Thank you ❤️
You got this beautiful soul 💚
Dear Rosemary,
YOU are brave… strong,
But most of all, in case you have forgotten
CAPABLE and resilient.
You will see. 🌹🌹🌹🌹
Best to you Rosemary. I've been there done That. Just remember not every day will be sunshine and rainbows. But not every day will be dog eat dog either. Find something of the little girl in you to find who you are. I once took some craft paint and painted 🎨 roses all along the edge of my bathroom mirror 🪞. Why? Because I could. Turned out so cute I painted Easter eggs on entry mirror. Wish you the best.
Thank you for the empowering message. Literally while I was watching this video, my spouse of 40 years told me to talk to a divorce lawyer because it is over. Susan, you, and this community are so very helpful in these difficult times.
Go girl! 💥 💥 💥 You have a cyber nation of women here to support you.
You were talking about me when my husband left after 25 years together. The part your right is I was so hurt that my life would never be the same. A life I loved. I’v never lived by myself until he left. I hate being alone, I never dreamed I’d be divorced at 69 yrs old and totally by myself. It’s been two yrs and I still can’t believe how fresh the wounds are. I never can get it out of my mind. Thanks Susan you always make me feel better and I love listening to you .
Take care and stay well. Till next time.
Hope you are doing better.
My husband walked out on me and left me in Canada, exactly 4 years ago tomorrow, after 37 yrs. I was 63 yrs young. We had duo citizenship so I choose to stay in Canada and that was the best decision I ever made. It was hard but I rediscovered myself after losing my identity in him. I’m not young but, I’m not old. I’m here. Flourishing and loving life. You are such an inspiration, Susan. ❤️😘🌹
Whenever I start feeling a bit sorry for myself, I think about how lucky I really am. And think about my blessings and don’t focus on my tragedies - and there have been plenty. I’ve been a widow for over 20 years. But have had a happy fulfilled life in the time since.
I live in a nice apartment in a lovely town and have a sweet little dog who brings me joy every day.
Life at 80 is good. 😊
Bless you❤🙏🏻
I’ve been divorced for 17 years. I died the day, a Sunday, I found him with someone else. He asked me for a divorce that same day and next Friday we signed the papers. I had to learn to breath. I lost 30 pounds. I had married in love wanting to die beside my husband. My prayer every day was to survive that day. The same prayer for six months. Over and over and over again. I am a special education teacher and I never missed a day of work. My students mom every once in a while I’d need one of the moms to watch my students while I went into the bathroom to cry. And I did. And then I came out to work again. I prayed and prayed and prayed. I went to a psychologist. My parents and best friends lifted me up. And after six months I was able to breathe and walk again. My heart had scars but it had started to heal.
These years have been difficult. No economic support from my ex for my kids but I am a brave hard working woman and God has been good. We have been tight money wise but have never gone with out a meal on our table.
I am grateful. God is so good he gave a chance to be truly happy, loved and in peace.
Women are strong and God is good. One day a time. I made it through. You can too. We all can. ❤️ Love from Costa Rica to you Susan and to all the woman working hard today. Don’t let go of Gods hand! ☺️🙏🏼🌸🇨🇷
Lost so much in this past year....a Tsunami of Trauma what with 3 deaths...one which broke my heart...my place of birth burned down....my original birth certificate has been lost in the post...I was unfairly omitted from my mother's obituary by my sister(family feud).... moved home to a completely different area from city to deep countryside ....my beautiful baba cat of 15 years died a few months before my move....I'M FEELING LOST AND OVERWHELMED BY THESE CHANGES !!
Your video which suddenly came up on my feed is so Welcome and Inspirational....giving me hope of not only finding myself again but to embrace all that is new....one day at a time ! 🙏❤
How are you now?
Women are leaving their husbands late in life too. I did a study on the subject. Here are some explanations why women called it quit after many years of marriage.
"I would never feel that I was actually retired if I stayed with him."
"The stress of growing older seemed to be all on me and not on him".
"I was nothing but a nurse and housekeeper but did not get paid and received no credit."
"I wanted to simply for once in my life focus on my own needs".
"There was no happiness possible living with him."
All my thoughts exactly.
True
"He loved someone else, and hated me"
You really hit the nail on the head. People say that love is blind, they are right. I think a lot of women of my generation, were nurturers. I didn't realize that he didn't care about my needs as much. It seems that people don't change how they think, they do change how they feel, because, then they want someone to care about how they feel.
Suddenly you realise there's only one person pulling the cart, while he was pretending all along.
You are an inspiration to me. I will be 71in May, thought I married the love of my life Sep 2012, messy divorce. In process of packing up my house with the help of a 48 yo friend, going to finish packing and loading truck tomorrow, unload at new townhouse, starting over with a twin bed, microwave, computer, and a dream of going to grad school to obtain masters social work, dual degree mental health and substance abuse. I have been in my current position 16 yr in August, love what I do. Watching your videos helps to keep me moving forward. Blessings dear one.
The first time I started over, I was 30. I was married to the love of my life (a musician) and surprise surprise….he cheated on me. I was devastated. The 2nd time I started over I was 40 with a 2 year old son. So devastated this time for my son. What helped me start over was I knew I was never alone. My deep faith in God/Jesus helped me through. Knowing he was always with me made it so comforting. Also, family and close friends. Like you, I always thought that there are people that are suffering and have it much more difficult than my situation. Then at 42, I was diagnosed with the worst case of leukemia- AML. I was always grateful I had my parents always by my side when there were people in the rooms next to me fighting alone. There is always someone that has it worse than you do. Also, your channel has really helped me in a lot of different ways. You are like my mentor and you give me ways to cope and you have such an artistic way of expressing yourself and I love that! Thank you for everything that you do for so many people in sharing your life. I’m so glad I found your channel. Love, Devon Leigh ❤️
Oh Devon Leigh...you touch my heart so...I am so lucky you found me! A very happy weekend to you! Love Always, Susan & Dez
Hope you are feeling better Devon
At 61, my life seemed more like a tattered jigsaw puzzle that had been put together and torn apart one too many times. Like you, Susan, I couldn't get my thoughts together, I felt a gamut of emotions, grief, loss, failure, hurt, betrayal, empty. All I could do was cry or sleep to escape the dread of every day waking up to the same emotional upheaval, hours wasted just staring at a blank wall, zoning out. Like the old pinball ball machines that would hit TILT, and everything stopped, that's how my life felt, and at one point I wanted it over for good. But each day, I started to realize I could breathe again, I had no more anxiety, I could seriously grasp what internal peace and calm felt like. I felt truly free.
My whole life had revolved around someone else, what they liked, what they wanted, how they wanted things, was I pretty enough, thin enough, and on and on, until I wasn't really there anymore. I'd put me on a shelf somewhere and then forgot about me. I really didn't know who I was anymore. But everyday I started to get to know myself again. I felt incredibly free...I only had to take care of ME. What I wanted to cook IF I wanted to cook, how I wanted to decorate my place to please ME, buy furniture without consulting anyone but ME, myself, and I. It was soooo much fun! Taking care of myself, learning to love myself, instead of constantly feeling like a one woman entertainment committee, that if I didn't measure up, and perform everything correctly, I could easily be replaced. It was like walking on eggshells every day.
Going it alone is a major adjustment, it's really a type of death, and there is going to be a mourning period. Everyone deals with the loss differently, but once you start loving on yourself, like you loved on someone who maybe didn't value you, it's the greatest thing. Loneliness comes and goes, but mostly goes. I know some people feel like they need someone in their life, but I think, the more time you spend taking care of yourself, you realize you don't really NEED someone...you may want someone, then again, you may realize that you kind of enjoy being free. And that's okay too.
Thanks for sharing.
@@christinehodder2747 Oh my gosh, Christine...how tragic. I can't fathom losing my only sister. As we've both gotten older, I think about it more often. We're just 3 years apart. She's the one I call or text about everything on a daily basis, and I tell her I love her every time. How painful for you to lose your sister; I can't imagine the depth of loss and grief. I'm praying for your wounded heart. But I am very glad she had a taste of joy and freedom for herself...even though it wasn't for as long as she or you may have wished.
Everyone that replied here has helped me today and Susan's video was very sad and away because of what Billy did to her 20 years with one man. I left a man after 15 years because he had PTSD. Thought at 43 I would find someone that would treat me well but I didn't.
Every man had bandages and it never worked out.
It was again a sad time and now I feel I can't let a man hurt me anymore.
So how do you go on when you really want love again?
Thank you for sharing this, Michel. You are right -- being totally responsible for yourself can be scary and intimidating, but gaining your own sense of autonomy and power is the most wonderful thing!
@@susan6398 the book that the back was read during this video that Susan got at the thrift store..."Traveling Light" by Max Lucado, has been such a blessing to me. I read it in just a couple days, not realizing there was a study guide in the back, so I'm re-reading it and doing the study guide at my own pace. I think one of the first things we really have to do is realize the baggage we ourselves carry around. It really impacts the type of people we're attracted to...and sometimes they're really NOT the kind of person that's good for us...but there are subconscious signals we give off and others give off that we may recognize as familiar and we end up gravitating towards that end up just the same as the hurtful relationships we've had before.
When I was trying to figure out why I always met people who seemed so wonderful in the beginning, romantic, attentive, kind...everything I wanted...only to end up with another physically and verbally abusive person...it felt like I must deserve this because that's how each person treated me. I got to a point where I just wanted to die, just so the pain would stop.
Then one day I picked up a book, can't even recall the title of it. It was written by 2 psychologists. In one chapter they were talking about being co-dependent. A term I didn't fully understand...but they described it like this: You're a recovering alcoholic, you're invited to a big party. But at this party no alcohol will be served at all. There are about 100 guests at the party, and somewhere in that group of 100 people there's 1 other recovering alcoholic. By the end of the evening, those 2 alcoholics will be together at the party. They said that when a person is healthy, normal, they see/recognize the RED FLAGS given off by the alcoholic, and heed those RED FLAGS as warning signs. To another alcoholic, who is familiar with all the RED FLAGS and know the ins and outs of alcoholic struggles, instead of being a warning to stay away or avoid...it's more like a gigantic WELCOME sign.
This can apply to any relationship. It can be an abuser relationship. Abusers can pick out a potential victim in a group the same way and will zero in on them. I actually dated a very kind person; gentle, so compassionate and caring...and I couldn't handle it. I used to tell friends I could bob and weave to avoid getting hit, but had no idea how to receive being treated kindly. It wasn't until I turned 29 and gave my life to Jesus that He showed me just how precious and wonderful He saw me. He showed me I deserved to be treated with love and compassion.
But, as the book, Traveling Light, describes..a lifetime of crap makes us carry a bunch of baggage that Jesus says we don't need to bear. We first have to recognize the baggage and then lay it at His feet and trust Him to take care of each burden as we recognize what they are. They're really like bricks we build around our hearts, that prevent us from loving freely without taking one of those bricks and throwing at the person trying to get to know you.. If we don't figure out the baggage and work to get rid of it one piece at a time, we'll just keep being attracted to the same type of people who end up treating us the same way as the bum we got rid of or who betrayed us.
Trust is a big issue with me. Do I trust God enough to remove a bag of betrayal, fear, pain, bitterness? Until I work on my trust issues and unload the baggage, I'll just build walls around my heart like a fortress and would throw them at anyone who attempted to come into my life. I'm gonna be 70 this year and don't have time to waste anymore on a relationship I'd no doubt sabotage and end up saying..see, I knew this would happen. Nope...I gotta work on unloading some baggage.
I hope you find the person who will love you like you want to be loved....and you might think about getting Max Lucado's book...I laughed and cried...but I'm working on being free of a lot of burdens Jesus says I don't need to carry.
We’re women and we are pretty strong when we have to be.
That's true 😊
Hi there my name is Steve I'm 61 years old I'm so sad what you ladies went true I just didn't know there was so many crazy guys doing these things😢 please take care of yourself Whis you the best. Don't give up you ladies are special ❤
I left my husband at age of 58. We were married 34 years, together 36. I loved him very much but he was verbally, mentally and emotionally abusive. I thought my life was over. You are right, positive thoughts kept me into the positive mind set. Doing thinks I enjoyed helped me to start enjoying life again. Enjoying being on my own was hard but I love myself now. Thank you for your videos. You have helped me understand that being alone does not make me lonely.
Congratulations on breaking free! Oh I agree with you....alone does not equal loneliness...there is nothing more lonely than being abused by the one person that vowed to cherish, protect and love you. That is true loneliness...A very happy weekend to you! Love Always, Susan & Dez
That is along time, what made you finally decide?
@@rhondaalan8436 I loved him and always hope it would get better. We have 2 children together who I wanted to grow up in a normal family. It was not the best decision but I did what I thought was best for them. I knew things were not normal but I realized after I left he was a narcissist. It was devastating but it answered a lot of questions on why he treated me so badly. My life has just begun. I try to think, things could be worse. My children and grandchildren are my life.
@@annetterhynold5177 that’s how it is with me after 39 years 3 kids, 8 grandkids. and he wants to leave me now. But the thing is Im not ready to let him go sad as that sounds!
@@annetterhynold5177: Narcissist always blame the other person for their miserable existence, and they gaslight the victim into believing there is something wrong with them. you integrate his reality of you and it destroys the true self.. But not completely. You will survive and thrive if you decide . God Bless.
To all the women who have started over after a heartbreaking situation - You've got this!
Susan, your video brought tears to my eyes. I've moved on after my ex-husband left me for another woman years ago. It was cruel and heartbreaking. I was pregnant. I had been married to him for 5 years. I had morning sickness. He acted more annoyed that I was sick. Then, he would say he was going to get gas and not come home until 5 or 6 in the morning. I thought I was over this but this video still made me cry. Maybe it's because I'm grateful that I was able to start over again. I was younger at the time. In my late 20s and pregnant with my first child. I moved back to Texas and had my baby with the support of my mom and dad. My ex and his new woman treated me like I was the "other woman" and infringing on their rights. It was a horrible time, but I came through it! I went to college and graduated. I found love again and my son is now 31 years old! My ex, my son's father died last Summer. He was an alcoholic and drank himself to death. Very sad. He had very little to do with my son. I raised him on my own with the help of my amazing parents. We do survive! Sending you love! I watch all of your videos. I love Dezi too. He's so precious.
God has worked in your life, hope you realize you dodged a bullet with this man.
Him leaving was a blessing to you and your son. Can you imagine if your son had an alcoholic man in his life as a role model. I doubt if the other woman was happy with him. There house was dysfunctional. You my dear was spared that disaster.
@The mysterious Miss X He was involved with his new mistress and didn't want to help. In fact, they treated me like I was the other woman. "All of you people"? There a lot of people that stand up and make promises they don't keep. Not sure why you're making this about my parents and what their responsibility was. My parents are amazing. I love them. And they loved me a lot more than my ex-husband did apparently. I would have been homeless without them. I don't know what your point is. You have a problem with my parents helping their daughter? The wedding day didn't mean much to my ex, but I meant something the THEM. Very grateful.
I am way past this. It was a complete blessing.
@@texasmimi5566 Hi Texas Mimi! I am in Texas also. It was over 31 years ago. Bullet dodged for sure! He died in July 2021. I hope he found peace beyond.
My mom had three children 6, 3, & 2 when my dad left us with under $100 in the bank. She made it work. We all went to college & have successful children of our own. My brother became a PhD researcher at pfizer and was instrumental in the research that created the covid treatment. She was an amazing woman that lived until she was 97.
Tell your brother "Thank you." from me.
Wow😊
Thank you for sharing your story. My mother is 80 and will soon turn 81 in June. My mother got the Pfizer shot,
please let your brother know I said thank you! 🌼
The world’s people thank your brother and his co workers.
Your mother definitely was a strong woman.
Her strength is what made you children's strong and into better adults because she put your children first.
She was a pioneer of a woman because she had to be and she lived a long life. I wish I could have been strong like that.
I understood when your goal was to not cry. When my husband asked me for a divorce I was shattered, but I had to show up for work. I had my own floral biz in Park City for 25 years. In any case, I allowed myself a pity party and to cry all I wanted in the shower and I watched my tears go down the drain and it was very healing. Then, one day, the tears, they stopped.
Bless you.
I have a pity party 1 day a month for 2 minutes. Haven’t shed any tears. Life is wonderful
I'm 60... I'm the one that had ZERO years with a man I loved and who loved me..... And at this age, I still pray for a good husband, even if it's only for 6 months. I haven't been hugged or given a Christmas present in 40 years by someone who loves me
Give yourself a present to you from you.Self love is a beautiful thing. Love yourself and make yourself happy. When the right man comes along he will need to love you just as much or more as he loves himself. Hug a friend.
i know what you mean.....no gifts or celebrations for many years for me......I don't think God is going to send me someone to love me.....
Loneliness has its own sadness that we learn to work through, but being with someone and feeling lonely is such a bitter feeling. You see the grass as greener on the other side, but "it could always be worse" might be being married, getting crumbs and disdain and coldness from the one who is "supposed to care: Maybe the one who is supposed to care about us IS ourselves. I know this doesn't give you someone in your life, but I heard a great metaphor once that just because you didn't have a great bonfire of love was no reason not to sit by the smaller fires of others. Be those fires of friends, or acquaintances, adventures, or volunteering. ANY time 2 humans are together, there is a little campfire of the soul going , and it's okay to warm your hands and heart with a smaller fire. It is better to warm yourself by those little fires than to yearn for a great bonfire to appear while you slowly freeze to death. And you might just find that those little fires can keep you as toasty and warm as a big bonfire. My heart goes out to you, and I wish you the best. @@artsylady3187
0h so sad making me cry .love you all honestly. WishingI could see you and hug you.I understand.
@@nelvinlewis23I understand your point but I am in her position and I do give myself great gifts for my birthday, Christmas and sometimes just because, but it’s just not the same as receiving from someone who genuinely loves you and wants to make you feel special.
Ladies, you will be fine. Sometimes, we don't understand the magnitude of damage that is done when these men walk out. You are the epitome of all great, grand, beautiful, and wonderful things. You are equipped with everything that you need and much more inside of you❣️ Forget about him. You do not need someone that will walk out on you.....he was just a lesson, that's all... nothing more. You got the lesson now. Go and get your blessings❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️
When I walked out on him 2 years ago at 62, I wasn't sure what my future would be, but I've never looked back at that moment with regrets and I'm happier now than I have ever been as an adult. Life is beautiful... now. Thanks for sharing your story.
Choosing to be single as a mature woman I feel is the greatest give we can give to ourselves....Congratulations...enjoy yourself to the fullest 💚
Same here.
Kathy, I’m that woman too! I’m 62, getting rid of most everything I own and moving on! Thank you and Susan for the encouragement!
I am so happy to read this Kathy...I felt I almost lived some of this journey with you. You look 10 years younger since you got your divorce...that sad look in your eyes is gone! I am so happy for you!!!
@@LittlePoet So agreed it shows in Kathys face!
I am 67 too since last September and I have been single/divorced since 2001. He was a very successful surgeon. We lived in Cairo, Egypt six months a year however, I left due to abuse physical and emotional that I had been conditioned to tolerate since a very abusive childhood. I have no children Before, and after college, I was in a long-term relationship for 16 years that also was abusive with a man who loved his mother more than life itself and even me. After 2001, I dated a few men but I no longer wanted or even trusted myself in a committed relationship and I knew I could never go through another break-up so I simply stopped trying. I used my nursing background to do some work as a Surgical Coordinator and then also used my acquired Administrative skills and worked for a Church for over two years. My Church job was eliminated due to the budget, and I worked with an oral surgeon until last April 2 when he died of the virus. After the practice was sold, I became semi-retired and I work with animals, dog walking, and cat sitting a few hours Monday to Friday to supplement my income and keep fit. I did pick myself up each time, I had no choice. It is not easy to go through life alone, but I learned to enjoy my alone time and I own my own condo. I would love to retire somewhere but have not yet zeroed in on where that would be. My family is not nearby and I take it a day at a time. I do thank God and I am grateful for what I have and I try to be content with the life I am leading. The story is not over yet.
Your comment is inspiring in that you're still working on life improvements. I'm nearly 66 and have had a very unpleasant time trying to meet nice people in a new city. It's just not worked out- except for valuable self growth.
But people wise it's been brutal and currently is a bit frightening.
I feel tired but need to get ready to move as soon as I can, and am considering moving to a friendlier city that could suit my personality better.
Your comment is inspiring. I'm nearly 66 and have had a very unpleasant time trying to meet nice people in a new city. It's just not worked out- except for valuable self growth.
But people wise it's been brutal and currently is a bit frightening.
I feel tired but need to get ready to move as soon as I can, and am considering moving to a friendlier city that could suit my personality better.
So happy to find your channel. I’m struggling to start over at 63 fearing the future being alone. Thank you for sharing.
Hi Susan, thank you for today. I'm 67, and this is the loneliness I've ever been. Looking back, I realize I've always people-pleased my friendships. Needless to say, those 40+ year relationship have not survived. I woke up. Thank God. But now I have no friendships. Pray for me that someone comes along for friendship and/or companionship. Peace friend. 🙂❤
I am with you on that boat.. no real friends, and the loneliness is almost the monster in the shadows or your shadow
Me too! It's the loneliness that is almost killing me. Happy Dee Dee. I will pray you find companionship. And I ask you pray the same for me.
@@LadyBug31705 Thank you sweet friend. Just your responds to my comment...made my day. I will absolutely add you to my prayer time. Have a Blessed weekend. 🙏❤
@@ceciliaabwao5958 Stay strong friend. God sees you...and he hears your prayer for fellowship. We gotta believe beautiful (real) relationship are just around the way. Peace friend. 🙏❤
Right there too with many of you out there. This is what I have learned clearing the tables in your life will leave nothing on that table for awhile and maybe a long while but when you begin resetting your table it will be with a completely different set of dishes and silverware. The ones you choose and that are not chosen for you. The ones that make you rejoice and speak uniquely to the person you are today. Be patient your new table is becoming piece by piece together beautifully.
8 Year's ago August 24th 29 year's married and 8 year's of dating I was with this man my husband who was having an affair, I threw him out of the house and from there I started over, I was very scared, my late sister Patricia helped me get through most of the divorce proceeding's but she died suddenly and I no longer had her, I pushed on and when I held those divorce paper's in my hand I looked up to the sky and I said "Patricia I did it" and I cried, I still pushed on, I prayed to Jesus to give me the strength to help me and here I am happy he is out of my life, no one deserves to be treated the way he treated me and I learned to Love myself and I pushed on and on, I said No this person isn't going to bring me down anymore I continued to go to the gym through it all take care of myself and Learned I had Worth and that I'm smart and that I can take care of myself......
you deserved better than what he did to you, i am so happy he is out of your life, my daughter has been through it TWO times, the second husband was worse than the first but she is free now of both of them. i hope you continue to take care of yourself---never give up and never stop treating yourself like No. 1...you are the master of your own life.
Thank you so much Brooke I really appreciate your comment...
Great job Karen! You are worth it.
Thank you a life blessed
I don't know anything about your relationship but most men have to endure an awful lot of misery to get them to the point of filing for divorce and or moving out. The main things most men want is some semi routine sexual activity and some peace and quiet. Most men don't want to be on the hamster wheel of always having to chase materialistic things in order to make a woman "happy"! But like I said I don't know anything about your relationship but sometime it does help us to do a little bit of self reflection and ask if we done everything we could have? And if the answer is yes then we can walk away with clean hands. If the answer is no then we can take the lessons that we learned from that relationship and hopefully not make the same mistakes in a new one. Good luck to you!
During one hot July l lost my husband (he died), my tenant, and my job. In that same month my daughter's nanny moved to a different Province. I was 59 (almost 60). For a year l stayed at my daughter's during the week to care for the kids. On weekends l took care of my own place. That was 17 years ago. After a year the nanny came back and l started living my own life but those were hard times. I believe we should never give up. The bad days are just bridges to better ones.
Women should be taught at very early age to have Plan B in case he changes his mind. There is no "death do us part" written in scriptures; ergo you may be traded in for a 1995. Be prepared, especially financially.😮
Love your positivity!! I've learned 2 things: 1) the glass is ALWAYS half-full, and 2) an attitude of gratitude is truly the wisest choice!!
At least you got the house, the neighbourhood and neighbours. I was forced out of my jointly-owned home after 23 years of marriage because he decided he wanted it for his own so decided to emotionally and verbally abuse me, and break my possessions. I took a small settlement because he threatened to bankrupt me in court if I took it to court. He had hidden bank accounts. I bought a small condo in an excellent location but was in horrible state in the unit. I completely gutted it and renovated it. Over the past 5 years I have taken great pleasure putting my touches to it. I have been getting counselling to deal with the trauma. He still has the house, our neighbours and friends who believe him when he says I LEFT, poor boy! I lost literally everything, but I gained much more. Safety....freedom.....
When you said my goal is not cry , tears come from my eyes. My husband passed away 5 years ago. 2 years ago I lost my best friend- my mother in low and my daughter lovely grandma and I’m really lost. Tried to find friend just friends - nobody. Grow daughter by myself . No relatives to help. I just put everything in God’s hand.
God is enough, sweetheart. Turn yourself to Him more, the rest will come.💐💐💐
I lost my husband a few years ago too. I’m sorry you also lost your friends. Keep sowing into new friendships, even if it takes so much energy. God does not want you to sit home alone all day and night.
I watched Mum start over 3 times! Once after my father with her 2nd husband. Then after him (no 2). Then she went to Ireland on her own for a year. She came back to UK, to start yet again, she was home for a month then died. She'd been diagnosed with lung cancer in R.O.I.
My Mum was FEARLESS. Courageous to the last.
My life turned upside down when my husband of 42 years died. He was my best friend. I still miss him every day but realized for my sake and the sake of my family I had to "put in the work" to grieve and move forward.
The Lord was right beside me and I discovered that focusing on service to others, gratitude for what I had . . . . and THRIFTING helped me a lot. I decided I wanted to live a nice frugal life and THRIFTING helped me to make my home cheerful and cozy.
Discovering your channel has been a real blessing. You prove that you can decorate beautifully on a budget and I appreciate your wacky side. Thank you!
💐♥️
Thank you so much for being here and sharing your story....I think service to for others is such a rewarding life. It's very tough for me to feel anxious when I am not thinking about myself. It wasn't until I stepped out the circle of myself that I started to grow so much happier and calmer. Going thrifting is so good for me....it takes me back to objects I have not seen in 60 years...it reminds me of people I loved...it turns me on to new painters, artists and designers I never would have discovered...and I meet lovely people there to boot! I have decorated with so many loving finds from the thrift store....and once in a great while I glance over to the men's shirts ad I sigh when I see a special one my husband would have worn...and then I move on..with my camera in tow and my heart in the right place...my love to you and yours, Happy Sunday, Susan & Desi
There is nothing like thrifting.Unknown treasures are wonderful conversational pieces that tell the story of where we have been and where we would like to go.
I’m not 60 yet, but not not only do I not dread it, but you show that a woman can be beautiful at any age. I’m determined to look & be even better in my 60’s than my 50’s. And to enjoy life even more! Thank you!❤🎉
How is it going? I just came upon this channel. I'm turning 60 in a few months.
My husband left me 4 years ago this July for a man! This was my 2nd time around with him and I was totally blindsided! Left a note on the kitchen table, 28 years down the drain, now 31, as I am still married because I can't afford a divorce. He is still paying the mortgage but won't get a divorce. I am now 70, gray and fat and I feel used up and abandoned. I have to work part-time to help pay Medicare insurance. I wish I had stayed in South Jersey and never given him a 2nd chance.
its ok sweetie i,l keep u in prayer prayer is the powerhouse keep praying God will undertake for you i hope you are ok an safe you watch God move God bless u sweetie 😊❤🙏🧔♀👵💐
Martna1, you don't need money for a divorce. You can file yourself at the couthouse. You don't need his permission. You say you "feel like a fat old lady". You can't reverse your age, but you can lose weight, which will help you physically and soulfully.
Now you can do what you want to do. You will feel happier as time goes on. Start taking care of you now. Exercising and eating fresh foods will help. Join something you are interested in.
Perhaps u can get half of some of his benefits if u are still married.
Just change him off yourlife insurance etc.
Don’t give up. One small day at a time. You can do it. Praying for you.
I praise my Heavenly Father for giving you, Little Poet, so much strengh and determination to be HAPPY... which you are achieving graciously and beautifully!!! 💖
🔥🔥Am 51 and I Went through a tough tyme in my early 40s,, Prayers Helped Me, And The Good LORD Showed Me That It was For His Good Purpose, He Taught Me To Leave Every Pain And Burden On His Feet, He Showed Me That Jesus Would Carry me Through, I have learnt, Peace, Love, Joy, Forgiveness,Endurance, Patience, Long Suffering, By Help Of Holy Spirit.. Reading The WORD Of God , And Finding Strength In The LORD...❤
I ask my family for help since I need it, I’ve been sick. They will provide simple tasks and indicate they will. Although, they do nothing! It’s really a shame since I spend day and night alone.
The man I live with at 70 works comes home and gets on games every night. Never spends a moment with me. My daughter is in college and indicated she has no time for me. Friends have left since I’m sick…so I live all alone everyday!
I know that being 2x divorced and at 50 yrs, I used to feel shame and humiliation. But NOW, I knew it was diving salvation. I get my moments , of course, but the resonance of inner peace is matchless to what tears meant. My recent divorce was a win not a loss. Thank you for your message at the right time.
🙏🏼💐
Dear Sweet Susan, We all here on your channel are so blessed to have you! You’re an inspiration and hope for us all. I look forward to visiting with you and all the beautiful friends that I found here on your channel at just the right time in my life when I was so lonely. You asked what we did to help when we were in a low point in our lives. I remember during lockdown from covid and trying to work from home and take care of my elderly mother I gave up on myself. No makeup wearing pajamas all day I’m sure some days I didn’t even brush my hair I just put it up in a clip. I remember sitting at my little makeup table thinking what happened to ‘me’ where did I go? In a little dish on the table was some pretty aqua blue earrings and I thought today I’m going to wear my earrings. And every time I looked in the mirror I’d see those beautiful little earrings dangling and it make me feel more like me. So the next day I put lipstick on with my earrings and each day I took a little time to add back something I did for me. I sounds silly but it made me feel better and got me to remember how the little things we do for ourselves no one else mean so much. We love and appreciate you thank you so much. Love always, Donna
I so understand what you are saying. I also took care of my mom and many days I would just pull my hair back in a ponytail, washed face and that was it.
My mom had to start over when my dad left her and it was so hard. I felt so bad for her. She had never worked a day in her life so she was terrified. Thank you for this. I wish my mom could have seen it. Love to you Susan. Melissa
Hello sweet Melissa! Oh I thought of you when I was thinking back on my early years ( I know yours were very tough too)...my Mom so distant and alone...terrible apartments and crying. I looked around and the walls were so bleak..I vowed when I grew up I wanted to make everything pretty. Your home is a masterpiece and your taste is exquisite in everything from makeup, clothes to furnishings...and you also have a great sense of humor...you make me laugh...your Tom Ford spoof is one of my favorites...your beautiful spirit will always soar...like you were born to make people happy. xxoo Sues
@Melissa55 same thing happened to my mom, I was 8 years old when my dad left her and us 3 kids, it was a very sad and hard life growing up, I miss my mom.🙏🏻❤️
@@BlingyBea Me too, My mom had nothing, when my dad left. I remember all the crying and how hard her life was, but she was a hard worker in the end she bought a house! She worked her way up in the world. It's so hard as a child to see your parent so sad and struggling.
@@kimlinford3484 same here, my mom had always been a housewife with only a 3rd grade education, she worked in a cleaners as a presser all her life, we had to move in with my grandparents, she did everything for us three kids and she never remarried, I miss her everyday, she passed 8 years ago at 90 years old.❤️🙏🏻
@@BlingyBea she sounds like a wonderful mom! I believe that a part of them is always still with us. And wow she lived to be 90!
Beautiful video. Thank you so much for creating it. I left my marriage 33 years ago. I sometimes look back and wonder what my life would have become. And then I realize that I wouldn’t be me if I had stayed.
I've been dumped plenty of times in my life but I did my share of dumping partners too. This made me finally consider how my X's that I left felt. It awoke the compassion in me. I'm alone with my cat & 74 now and have convinced myself that that's just fine.
Yes I've spent my life turning nothing into beauty...💐
I'm an expert at starting over however when my mother passes (I am currently her sole caregiver) I will have no family...This will be a very different kind of starting over ..I never dreamed that at 66 I would be without family...😞
My goal is to move to Costa Rica and grow a medicinal herb garden since I won't be able to depend on Amazon for my supplements haha and everyday watch the sunset...
What always helps me is crying, singing, dancing, journaling, creative self expression. ..but it's never easy...
The bad times pass...they always do . We realize we are so much more braver, stronger, wiser than we ever dreamed . I became a widow at 43 ,I'am 72 now, and I have survived and life is good. We change grow,and roll with punches. Love your positive take on life and all the good advice and tips
This month will be the 4th anniversary of my husband's death. After he died I found out he was cheating on me. He was 65 seeing a woman in her 40's with 3 teenagers. What was he thinking? She was only taking to him to get money. He found this out and had a heart attack, died 30 hrs later. I wad so mad, my God took care of him. Done even think about him anymore. I feel bad for my kids, they didn't deserve this!!! Hope you move on.
What a jerk, sad to say many out there just like him. I hope your doing fine
Once you start positive thinking it's hard to get out of it. :) good quote
After my divorce 14 yrs ago, i stopped watching all the shows i loved , the medical, lawyer and cop shows, and just watched comedy, and thats pretty well all I watch these days, i need the laughter, the lightness, the no brainer entertainment. After all these years, i still dont know where im going, but im selling this run down house, selling and donating everything that doesnt fit on one pallet, and will leave this town, this island and this country and will start a new adventure. I cant wait !!!
Congratulations!!!!! You broke free....your new wonderful exciting life awaits you Viktoria!!!!
You would do very very well. You have the right attitude. Amen. Amen. Amen
My husband died in 2016 after being ill and I was a caregiver and many other job titles as well. I had to face many new things at age 57. I never thought I’d still be living in the home we built and shared for 30 years. However, I’m still here and the memories are so strong. My faith and reading the Bible helped me through so much. So many don’t realize what a huge loss it is unless they’ve experienced it. A friend, a lover, your children’s father, and your shoulder to lean on are gone forever.
Can’t wait for your anniversary video. It’ll be awesome I know.
Cheryl, SO SORRY for your loss .I KNOW exactly how you feel as I also lost my husband. It will be 7 years ago this June and I still cry for him. As you said, No one will ever really understand what it is like to lose your spouse who played so many countless roles in your life. I wish you well and God's Blessings of strength and comfort as you walk through these years. I share your faith in believing through God's Word that we will be reunited one day. Thank You, Jesus !!!!!
@@pattyallen5313 oh thank you Patty. My husband, Larry, passed in the month of June also. I am sorry for your great loss as well. I am so grateful that I had 32 years with him. We will be reunited with them one day. Thanks for your kindness. God bless you. 🙏🇺🇸
Another wonderful video . . You shine, my friend. My ex just walked out, when I was 57. I'll be 72 in September. it was rough, not going to lie. I dated a bit and had one very comfortable and promising relationship; however it was not to be. I still struggle with whether or not I even want a man at this point. I like being in control of my life and doing what I want. I'd like more gal pals!
Yes I would love to have more female friends I can travel with and go out with.
it’s so hard finding gal pals, bless you both🙏🏻❤️
Congratulations on 7 years on RUclips. I am remodeling my condo and I look at your apartment for inspiration. You have such great taste.
Awww. I miss my mother sooooo much. Living without her so long never gets easier. The pain and loneliness just becomes my
"Normal" unfortunately 🙏😪
I miss my mother so much…I can’t not get over passing away😢..I am filled with sadness and struggle to fighting everyday!
I'm trying to remember in my 20's when I was struggling with the ability to hold a job cause I was always crying. [Depression] What got me through was my mom's smile. Her constant reminders that your going to be ok. It will happen was her reminder. It did. My God if she only knew how I'm doing. God Bless her soul. 🙏
She does.
Winston Churchill stated, "Never,Never,Never,Never Give Up." I like the saying and it helps me. For all the loss I experienced, I got everything I lost back and I am stronger for the experience.
Alright Rebecca!!!!
My Mom had a saying, "Things could never be so bad that they couldn't get worse."I had a friend who was so negative that I had to break up with her. She would go on a cruise and complain about everything about it.Negative people love to drag us down.Your Spirit is so uplifting,people must love to be around you.
When my husband died a couple of years ago, I felt so lonely and sad 😥, but with God's help I have made it! I have 2 knees that need replaced, but I have to lose 40 pounds and it is very hard to do when you can barely walk, but I have hope and that keeps me going..Love you sweet gal ❤
I had my knees replaced in 2018 I am 65 and feel great bless you
I had knee replacement … kept putting it off but the pain keeps you awake at night and we need our sleep. Do something good for yourself and talk with a dietitian and they can help you loose that weight….I know, been there and done that. God be with you and best of luck! You can do this!!
I have osteoporosis and am on a cane, but I changed my diet got rid of anything with added sugar, removed grains from my diet and slowly loosing weight. It can be done.
Try ddpy yoga. I started doing bed routine due to brain injury. Now can stand and balance.
Susan, you are just getting more beautiful every year. I think it’s because you are happy and secure with yourself. I think I know how you feel because I divorced after 41 years! I was miserable for the last 20 of those years but stayed because of my children. It was scary to leave but I loved being on my own and free from all that conflict and worry. It cost me a lot in many ways but almost 10 years later, I’ve met someone who loves me, holds me and we live with no worry or conflict. Just love. I will never feel insecure and scared again even if I find myself alone again. We are strong women.
I'm going through divorce now - very hard but I know I deserve better - someone that is loving and has empathy. My ex was narcissistic to extreme. Glad I'm on my healing journey now. I do miss the companionship of having someone to do things with. How do you meet someone when you are older? Where do you meet a decent man? Seems they are all selfish these days.
Whenever I feel a bit sad or just fed up there is a saying that motivates me. “Every journey begins with that first step”. Helps me get out of bed and move on. Xx.
Omg how crazy. When you first said the goal.......as I listen with never ending it seems tears.......in my head I said my goal is to "not cry" and then you said it 😱 so wow bittersweet to know I'm not alone. I just turned 60 in October. Divorced since 2015 and recent break up with someone I dated the last couple years. Damnit I just can't become okay with being alone 🤷🙄. Why? I mean I stay busy to keep my brain occupied but when I sit to break or rest I hate it. I hate the silence. I hate eating alone. I have never even went out to eat by myself. I just want a husband a partner a companion. This feels uncomfortable. Being alone just feels lonely 😭. Maybe I should get a puppy. Maybe I should drink more wine 🍷 ugh. Thank you for letting me vent on your comments you're so sweet 💖
Hi Susan, I've been binge watching your videos, especially the ones on starting over. I'm 65 and am raising my 7 yr old granddaughter. Listening to each video makes me want to take notes, so I don't forget the amazing wisdom you have shared. I'm still married but am filing for a divorce. He has been verbally abusive and emotionally and physically neglectful. I'm just tired of the empty life I lived. You have been so encouraging and insightful I feel that I can take this leap of faith and get out. Starting over is what is in my head and I see myself in my own apt. living the way I want not according to him. Thank you for sharing your struggles, strengths and victory's. I feel I have a chance for a new life. Hugs to you and Desi!!!
God bless you 🙏
I found you about a month ago. I wish I had found you seven years ago!! My husband left me after 47 years of marriage for a younger woman. I also lost my mom and dad unexpectedly earlier the same year. To say I was Devastated is an under statement! I knew I wanted to be happy again. My dad always asked me if I was happy. He said that’s the most important thing! I wanted so bad to be happy. I made sure I had plans every weekend. Sometimes I dreaded the upcoming weekend all week but I made myself do it! I still remember meeting two friends for
Lunch and it hit me. I was happy for the first time in several years. It’s been 7 years and I still fret over why. But my word for the year is toward. And I try everyday to look forward and not dwell on the past. Thank you for your reminders! You give me the drive to keep working toward my happiness! My Daddy would be proud!
Dearest Susan, I was so happily surprised yesterday when, in my shock, I shared about losing my darling Angel, a buff Tabby. AND YOU ANSWERED!?! And this community listened and you all cared. 💗 Thank you x 1000!
I was young when I got divorced, 25. I felt like I was going to implode.
WHAT HELPED ME THEN was to set milestones. 1Day, 1 Week, 1 Month, 1Year. I kept a journal(kinda), I embroidered & framed The Serenity Prayer and I believed that God, and my friends had something better for me.
I felt it was out there. JUST one foot in front of the other. A day, A week, A month and A year at a time...letting those emotions, struggles, triumphs and fears flow on to the paper. It all started to take on the presence of a watercolor, or fall together like a lyric to a melody. Your genuinely sincere demeanor helps us through.
Today was A Day since I lost my little Angel. It has been hard, tears come easy and I can imagine touching her incredibly soft fur. It would drift on a breeze if I held a bit up to the sky.
Like this community, I will hold her in my heart, and each week spend a few minutes lovingly remembering My Angel Bug. With all of you to laugh & cry with. I will get through. Never did I think an online community would be this real. But it is, and Susan, you are the Highpriestess of Hopefulness. 😘😢🐾🌈⚘
I want to just hug you...your baby was so pretty...I loved the pictures! I am so sorry you are sad...it is just devastating to lose a pet...part of our family,,,,, part of us. It is my honor to talk to you and know of your life. We gals have to stick together....xxoo May your weekend be peaceful and full of good memories...love to you and yours, Susan
@@LittlePoet She was a beauty to be sure. I found some fur in her brush, and taped a bit into each card that came along with the paw print we got at the Vets office. It was truly like silk, in both denier and texture! Her fur was her crowning glory...her temper was her sore spot. Just proving to us all that being loved is possible without being perfect!
❤ Hugs, Honey. I cling to Jesus and let Him hold me. I know how you feel.
20:40 "where women are right now". I'm set to retire in one year and I have no friends to socialize with. For the past 35 years, I've been working, raising a son, keeping a house, caring for pets and elderly parents. And now at 60 yrs old, no friends. Is it possible to make new friends at 60 yrs old?
It is very possible!
Yes. I have moved twice since retiring. I am a joiner, so I joined a church, clubs and volunteered. I do things that I want to do trips, theater,movies etc. I sometimes meet people, I sometimes don't but I have an interesting experience. My conversation is more interesting, I enjoy new places and things and get to see new places. It sure is better than being bored, lonely and stagnant
I wonder the same thing! I’m too much of an introvert! I had close friends (some of them died) but some just didn’t stick around during the years I gave care to my husband. So here I am all alone and wondering if life is worth all the trouble. I have grown sons and grown grandchildren but they don’t have time for an old woman. And I never tell them how I’m feeling either. Now on a happy note I do have a wonderful 3 year old doggie who is the absolute love of my life.
Yes, you are at the beginning of a new adventure! There are always people that need a friend. Put on a smile and join other like minded people and you will meet friends.
@@Paula-xp7ve Kids shouldn't have to be told that their mother needs some attention. I'm sure you had time for them as you were raising them, so now it's your turn. But we get overlooked as we get older. Dogs are very loyal and will stick by us. We are never too old for our dogs and they bring so much to our lives. I am also an introvert and it is hard to meet others as we get older. Hang in there!!
I used the occasion to work with my 4 children, theirs spouses...my grandchildren, helping to transition with dignity, family respect intact. 10 yrs.passed now and I feel Marvelous. The grandkids are having kids an I am ready to make a great thing. Its a good feeling having respectfully taken care of Bussines.
Today, I cried. This brought me to tears because it hit home. Thank you Susan for reminding me I am not alone and that this too shall pass.
Starting over at 50 with 3 teens & I feel the peace in your eyes. Love the music & wisdom in your videos. ❤ you offer HOPE
You always know how I feel and give me exactly what I need to hear, so thank you so much for being there for me. My husband and I were High School sweethearts. We married though in 1995. We were married almost 26 years until my husband passed away from cancer. Since that time I have been trying to heal.
Oh Cynthia I am so deeply sorry you lost your dear husband last year. I am comforting knowing you had so many years with a man you loved so deeply...and that is a small consolation now in your time of healing...but I see it. I am sending you well wishes and prayers....thank you so much for being here, Susan
🙏🏻🙏🏻
Hello Susan, I have had to reinvent myself quite a few times. I have always been a strong woman. I'm now 63 and have been living the high life...haha, for 18yrs. My second husband died when I was 45. My son was on his own and I was so ready for an adventure, so he got my home and I got an apartment, changed jobs and moved away from my home town.
It's been interesting to say the least. I got arrested for defending myself against a bully. Don't fret, the charges were dismissed and my reputation restored.
I've had to retire last October, due to sever arthritis, and I just finished paying off my mini home, sold my other home to my son.He got a deal...lol
I too have a dog, Sir Simon Wigglebutte. My greatest love ..
So I know how to get er done. Yes, I like living alone and being retired is a learning curve for sure. I Never gave it a thought that I couldn't make it...Just knew I could do it. Oh, I had my moments, yet I had ME and I know ME.
What a lovely surprise to finally discover how unlonely being alone can be. Ellen Burstyn
What I'm having some issue with is my disability. It's making me mad that I can't do all the things I was so looking forward to doing once I retired. So, I'm back to having to reinvent me again. I was a nurse all my life.....Being a patient isn't going to be something I will adapt to easily.
You give Desi a scratch for me. God Bless you Susan.
Love you Susan. You’ve become very successful and you should be so proud. You’re stronger than you know. You’ve made it. 😊💕
🥳🥳MAZEL TOV!!!!! 7 YEARS!! How wonderful!! and you are more beautiful everyday!! I know it has been a long hard road but the truth is you are truly amazing and you have really created a beautiful life for your self and an amazing community of women are here every week to celebrate with you because of your sweetness and transparency and desire to help women get back on their feet. The one thing I do when I find myself having my own person pity party is to get up, take a shower and get outside because it just helps to re-direct my emotions. I go to an antique or thrift shop and find some pretty things to look at. I stay gone until my mood has changed and I have left the pity party behind me. After all, "It could always be worse"!!! Love to you and Gangsta Dez 💝
Thank you, currently going through a breakup and turning 60 in a few days. Throughout this relationship I have lost my self worth, my confidence, I have lost ME.
I can relate to that. I hv been with my husband for 34 years. just found out he has been gambling for at least the past year. I am 67 and not in good health. this channel feels like a life line
Your not alone..me 2 hugs and love
Omg this is so me now after 39 years my husband is leaving me! I can’t cope 😢 I have nothing left, my mind keeps telling me to end my life 😢😢 so hard
Bless you Darling. You can cope! You won’t see it now. Tomorrow next month or even next year. But you will. Time is a good healer.I’ve been in my own 14 months now. My Husband left me after 35 years. I wanted to die, I tried to take my own life. But God didn’t want me in his world yet. He won’t want you either Darling. What I believe now is this. If someone can come along n take him from me he wasn’t mine in the first place. He was weak. But I’m strong. Us Ladies are strong. We have to be. God Bless you. Think of all the good you have in your life. Is this man worthy of uou. No he’s not. Xxx
@@amandahandford8041 I know! But I still love him even though he’s doing this to me 😓I can’t imagine him not in my Life
Get mad. Anger will move you forward. It is very motivating. Then over time, you will settle into a calmness. That's how I coped with it. I now live in a little place by the seaside retired. I didn't need him. That is the amazing thing.......you don't need him.
@@MyMaria1224 I still love my Husband now. But would I take him back no. You won’t see it now lovely but in time you’ll remember this message n think this woman was right. You take care of yourself .
You can do this! He will be so surprised when he sees you thrive!
I kicked him out 7 years ago. He was an alcoholic and a jobless bum. He didn't want me to work because that meant he wasn't a "man" 🙄. I planned everything with the assistance of a DV counselor, as far as the laws, as what I could and couldn't do. All the bills had cut off notices and I had no job, but I had my house, that's all I needed. I have a wonderful friend who gave me the money to keep my lights on until I found a job. I never looked back and have never been happier. Best decision I ever made, should have made it sooner. Thank you so much for your video Susan.