One of the pitfalls I come up against with this approach is that it is undeniable that everyone wants to get better so the "acceptance" becomes a means to an end. People are trying to accept/allow in order to hopefully heal but ultimately nobody wants these symptoms. Inevitably one gets frustrated when they don't go away, and starts seeking solutions in other places again. I have gastroparesis from LC and supposedly that never goes away, I can hardly eat anything, and I feel scared and like I'm dying almost every day. I end up feeling like it's my fault that I'm sick because I don't have the right mindset or meditate enough.
I agree. What we call long covid is probably a bunch of different conditions lumped together each of which have very different underlying dynamics and very different degrees of severity. What I’ve found is that there is in fact a lot you can combat with medicines and supplements, but that pacing and stress reduction and sleep are essential too. You need to do everything you can to tame this beast. That’s what it’s like for me. For others it seems that they just need to let their body do the fighting. It wasn’t like that for me. I did let my body do the fighting for quite a while and I took lots of rest and had reduced my stress and overwall extertion down to a very low level, but I didn’t fully recover. I guess everyone is different.
In the end, it's all about dropping the fear and learning to be OK despite symptoms because we actually ARE ok. Improved well-being and empowerment is a by product of that. Also this mindful approach is helping thousands recover from chronic illness. It's only natural that our protective brain will send more messages of threat if we are feeling fear or frustration and intensify symptoms. Detaching ourselves emotionally and seeing them for what they are, is the best thing you can do for your nervous system. 🙂
This technique is amazing, I start with Raelan and your videos 2 months ago and now a can go to places that the sensation of fear conquer me, now it's a little bit better, there are just sensations, emotions and the only way to showed that they are safe is experimenting, living, and let it be Thanks and a big hug from México Kyle
Thankyou❤ This was really helpful for me today. Its the perfect example of mindfulness and i need to get better at practicing it. I also remind myself that this period of time is a stepping stone to increased capacity in my recovery journey.🙏
I’m trying more and more with this so thank you. It’s so damn hard and I often have total meltdowns because of my frustration of my limitations. I compare myself to others doing better ( this is probably deep rooted but didn’t realise until now that I’m unable to do what I want). I worry my frustration and anger at my body and the rage and tears that come up aren’t helping, but sometimes especially when dealing with stress I can’t handle but have to, my symptoms terrify and anger me. I am trying but omg!! Thanks again
Thanks for your great videos Kyle! I'm recovering from LC and since I am using this kind of methods I've made big steps :) Keep up the good work! Greetings, Thymen
Developing the ability to concentrate is crucial for making this work; that's when the 'aha' moment really struck me. I recently watched a video about the posterior cingulate cortex of the brain and how it expands when engaging in exercises that demand focus and mindfulness. Thank heavens for neuroplasticity, it really works!
Hi Kyle, Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom, extremely helpful :) A while ago I saw your interview on Raelan's channel, that's where I found you. You said that you used to struggle with social anxiety too; I've been struggling with this for many years (at the moment it's mostly anxiety about the stress-response it invokes and therefore worsening my long-covid symptoms). I am wondering if you used the same approach to heal from this (allow, accept, compassion)? When I look at my own experience, I can see that in moments when I'm alone at home and I think about some possible future social event, I start having anxious thoughts but mostly my nervous system responds with fight/flight/freeze (usually even without me having conscious anxious thoughts). I see that this would be an opportunity to sit with the sensations and the emotions. But then, how to deal with this in the actual social situations? The responses are so fast, so that when I'd find myself in social interaction, I'm already in some kind of survival response, mostly Fawn or Freeze, I can't think clearly anymore, am disconnected from myself and the ability to be the observer doesn't seem available at that time. I wonder if you could say something about this (I'm sorry about the long text...!) With love from the Netherlands :)
I would recommend the same approach + maybe some techniques to calm the nervous system (meditation, yoga nidra, light stretching, nature) and just notice the fear around the symptoms and let it be felt and allowed to come up
Same, i have this from the Vak. Its frightening and i cannot breathe going to sleep eith the adrenaline dumps, constricted nerves, muscles and lung spasms. It feels like im dying.
Hi Kyle ive just found your channel ❤️🙌 thankyou for your work! Just wondering, the technique in this video, is it quite similar to "somatic tracking " ?(if ypu have heard of that)
You're welcome! I think it is because others have mentioned that, I don't know enough about somatic tracking to say for sure haha But I wouldn't worry too much about designating differences between techniques, just apply what works :)
Kyle my bro, the volume is much better on this video, good job. Also wondering if you could give me some pointers on what I'm dealing with concerning getting the symptom imperative to stop.
I was doing a lot better but recently had food poisoning and now think I’m going through a major relapse. My stomach has started rejecting all food again (I get these surges of awfulness when I eat). I try to do the somatic tracking to stay with my symptoms during these surges and through the pain but struggling. Is this the right approach? My old fears of worrying about what I’m eating and how often are all coming back…plus seeking help from someone else… would have any advice?
Not at the moment, I would suggest maybe just watching this video to get a feel of it and then set time daily to feel into doing it in a way that works for you 🤷🏼♂️
I just can’t deal with my anxiety. It feels like my brain predicts everything I feel and is confused as to why I am so scared all day now. I was diagnosed with pots 7 months ago but am just confused and constantly scared all day about irrational fears but also how I feel and how I felt previously. I can’t seem to get past the idea of acceptance when my brain is always scared and triggered by everything. Whether it’s thinking of being I’ll or comparing to others who have gone to hospital makes me so scared that I will have to even though I won’t as everyone is different and doctors have always been reassured. I can’t seem to get on with life because due to constant stress that any second something bad will happen and trying jy to exercise and contact friends but just worrying all day. Sometimes it’s so overwhelming I can’t even sit still and can’t watch TV. I guess my question is how did you deal with the mental side as it feels like my anxiety is the most intense out of the two and lessening it will help massively in my road to complete recovery. I’ve been able to cycle for hours and eat at a restaurant but some days I just feel like being scared and sitting in bed worrying that I’m not safe. As an 18 year old I’m so scared that my body can’t cope with this and just can’t see how I’m going to get my old life back. What was your daily life and did you ever travel or were you housebound?
Have you tried any sort of talk therapy? I've found that expressing these sorts of feelings out loud to a caring professional can really help to alleviate some of the weight that this anxiety causes. I know that going to a therapist can itself be very anxiety inducing BUT I've always personally felt so much better when I've left. I have been struggling a great deal lately and have not been seeing a professional to talk with and I know it would help me a great deal. I'm going to get back on track with finding someone I feel I can trust and open up to. I hope you can do the same.
Hey man, I can relate to what you're experiencing. Firstly I'll just say that it's ok. It's ok that there is all this fear, it's ok that there is all this anxiety and crazy thoughts. It's really ok and you're not going crazy despite what the thoughts might say. I would suggest really giving yourself some more space to allow these deep fears and emotions to be felt. Don't identify with them but really recognise that it is ok that intense fear is here, you're allowed to feel it. I would recommend the same approach I share in this video for the fear and the thoughts. Also check out some of my other videos about emotion work, I talk a bit more about this. It's ok if you can't go out and do things sometimes you just need to be alone and feel and process. I spent a lot of time house bound and unable to do any exercise or socialising at all. It was tough at the time but a blessing in the end because it forced me to face all that stuff that was coming up and needed to be felt. Also like the other commenter mentioned talk therapy can be quite helpful because it allows these emotions to come out. There's a lot to unpack so if you need additional support I do offer one on one sessions to help people work through their situations. You can email me at kylemeintjes@gmail.com and we could set up a session to work through this stuff. Otherwise yeah any good therapist that resonates with you.
Hmm I really like the Emotion Work playlist from Simply Always Awake, I've shared some of my favourites in the community tab, probably the ones titled Uncomfortable Try This and Granular Emotion Work. Of my videos I think the ones called Compassion Work and Allow Yourself To Feel It All are good for just allowing whatever challenging experience is coming forward @@arieldeangelo8439
Hi Kyle, I resonate with the technique and I am starting to do it but I have some doubts. As you are feeling the emotions, thoughts in the body, you are narrating out loud something? or is it just about feeling the sensation without speaking anything? if while doing the technique come tears or strong emotions, we continue with it feeling them? how to know when we can end the technique? because it could become endless and how would be a good way to end it? if when we stop it we feel sadness for example, we do the technique again with that emotion? or it would be advisable to do some more positive visualization to get us out of a possible loop to the resistance of not having managed to minimize any symptom? sorry for so many questions! I do not know if I am explaining myself well as it is not my first language, but any help will be very welcome. Thank you Kyle!
I feel what's important for you is to not overthink this, it's not a complex thing. Just feel. All those questions are just doubt thoughts. You feel the emotion and then doubt is coming up to hold you back from just letting go and feeling, it's all fine but just notice oh I'm getting up in my head about this, what if I let go of all doubts and questions and just allow and feel what comes up. And maybe you need to feel a lot of doubt, that's absolutely fine but just don't hold on to the thoughts and questions, let them just come and go, oh that's just some doubt. So, you can talk out loud to yourself or not when when doing this. It can be helpful but just do what works best for you. You can feel what ever comes up and you don't need to control or stop it, just allow and soothe and give it lots of love and space :)
@@life.withkyle wow, brilliant Kyle. I realize how unconnected I have been with my body my whole life, living only through my ''head'', rationalizing everything and not allowing myself to feel through my body, which probably played a part in getting me to where I am today. Proof of this is that I am asking you how to do something that seems logical that we would know how to do innately and easily. Thanks for your help and for being there. Big hugs and congratulations on your great journey.
Sorry just a second point. How do you deal with fear of being Ill on top of all of this especially when that’s what triggered everything in the first place?
It really just has to be acknowledged, felt and explored. It's challenging and scary at first but it really is ok to fully feel that fear and just let it come up. Give it compassion and space and allow it to be felt. The technique I describe here is really applicable to any emotion
Don't resist the resistance allow it to be there and show love and compassion it's confusing a little bit to me still it's like I'm not trying I'm just allowing acceptance compassion
I really struggle with the resitance, i feel it and i think that i dont want to feel it. You made it a little bit more clear for me, is it enough to say i see the part of me that is feeling resistance and you can be here?
Yeah exactly that's great, and then I'd suggest just really trying to feel into that resistance in a gentle way. "Can I explore it a bit more, give it more space to be felt, really explore what it is that can't be felt" It can feel quite restless and uncomfortable but just stay with it as much as possible and notice the resistance thoughts that come up as well "this is too intense" "I can't stay with this" etc. Just thoughts and explore the feelings as you can in a way that works for you :)
One of the pitfalls I come up against with this approach is that it is undeniable that everyone wants to get better so the "acceptance" becomes a means to an end. People are trying to accept/allow in order to hopefully heal but ultimately nobody wants these symptoms. Inevitably one gets frustrated when they don't go away, and starts seeking solutions in other places again. I have gastroparesis from LC and supposedly that never goes away, I can hardly eat anything, and I feel scared and like I'm dying almost every day. I end up feeling like it's my fault that I'm sick because I don't have the right mindset or meditate enough.
I agree. What we call long covid is probably a bunch of different conditions lumped together each of which have very different underlying dynamics and very different degrees of severity. What I’ve found is that there is in fact a lot you can combat with medicines and supplements, but that pacing and stress reduction and sleep are essential too. You need to do everything you can to tame this beast. That’s what it’s like for me. For others it seems that they just need to let their body do the fighting. It wasn’t like that for me. I did let my body do the fighting for quite a while and I took lots of rest and had reduced my stress and overwall extertion down to a very low level, but I didn’t fully recover. I guess everyone is different.
In my opinion you accept them, to make them go away. That's not acceptance. Not judging you, just what I read in your words.
@@teddybearroosevelt1847do you have hypomobility àspergers different nervous system.whats worked best for you fybromyalgia 6 years due to mcas CFS 26
In the end, it's all about dropping the fear and learning to be OK despite symptoms because we actually ARE ok. Improved well-being and empowerment is a by product of that. Also this mindful approach is helping thousands recover from chronic illness. It's only natural that our protective brain will send more messages of threat if we are feeling fear or frustration and intensify symptoms. Detaching ourselves emotionally and seeing them for what they are, is the best thing you can do for your nervous system. 🙂
@@leahcalabro2787has it worked for you
This technique is amazing, I start with Raelan and your videos 2 months ago and now a can go to places that the sensation of fear conquer me, now it's a little bit better, there are just sensations, emotions and the only way to showed that they are safe is experimenting, living, and let it be
Thanks and a big hug from México Kyle
So great to hear! You're welcome 🙏🏼🤍
Thank you for continuing to upload Kyle. These techniques have been crucial in my life.
You're so welcome, glad to hear that!
Thankyou❤ This was really helpful for me today. Its the perfect example of mindfulness and i need to get better at practicing it. I also remind myself that this period of time is a stepping stone to increased capacity in my recovery journey.🙏
You're welcome! Good way of looking at it✨️
I like the 2 mins from 18:02 - 20:02 it feels like a good summary. Thanks Kyle.
🙏🏼🙏🏼
I’m trying more and more with this so thank you. It’s so damn hard and I often have total meltdowns because of my frustration of my limitations. I compare myself to others doing better ( this is probably deep rooted but didn’t realise until now that I’m unable to do what I want). I worry my frustration and anger at my body and the rage and tears that come up aren’t helping, but sometimes especially when dealing with stress I can’t handle but have to, my symptoms terrify and anger me. I am trying but omg!! Thanks again
Same here decades how are you now
Your work reminds me a lot of the ENERGY FLOW COACHING Program I am doing with Kyle Davies in Wales.
Thanks for your great videos Kyle! I'm recovering from LC and since I am using this kind of methods I've made big steps :) Keep up the good work! Greetings, Thymen
Thanks Thymen! :)
Developing the ability to concentrate is crucial for making this work; that's when the 'aha' moment really struck me. I recently watched a video about the posterior cingulate cortex of the brain and how it expands when engaging in exercises that demand focus and mindfulness. Thank heavens for neuroplasticity, it really works!
Hi Kyle,
Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom, extremely helpful :)
A while ago I saw your interview on Raelan's channel, that's where I found you. You said that you used to struggle with social anxiety too; I've been struggling with this for many years (at the moment it's mostly anxiety about the stress-response it invokes and therefore worsening my long-covid symptoms). I am wondering if you used the same approach to heal from this (allow, accept, compassion)?
When I look at my own experience, I can see that in moments when I'm alone at home and I think about some possible future social event, I start having anxious thoughts but mostly my nervous system responds with fight/flight/freeze (usually even without me having conscious anxious thoughts). I see that this would be an opportunity to sit with the sensations and the emotions. But then, how to deal with this in the actual social situations? The responses are so fast, so that when I'd find myself in social interaction, I'm already in some kind of survival response, mostly Fawn or Freeze, I can't think clearly anymore, am disconnected from myself and the ability to be the observer doesn't seem available at that time. I wonder if you could say something about this (I'm sorry about the long text...!)
With love from the Netherlands :)
Thank you for this great video. Just what I needed to hear today! It literally couldn't have come at a better time
You're so welcome man! Glad to hear it 😁
I’m going to try this technique. Thank you for posting. God bless you🙏🏽
You're welcome! Good luck doing the work 😄🙏🏼
Thanks so much Kyle! This is gold!
You're welcome, glad to hear it! 😁🥇
What about disordered breathing ? Thanks
I’m also having the disordered breathing
I would recommend the same approach + maybe some techniques to calm the nervous system (meditation, yoga nidra, light stretching, nature) and just notice the fear around the symptoms and let it be felt and allowed to come up
Same, i have this from the Vak. Its frightening and i cannot breathe going to sleep eith the adrenaline dumps, constricted nerves, muscles and lung spasms. It feels like im dying.
Disordered breathing is this when you feel like auto breathing has shut off or not keeping pace with your heart rate?
Hi Kyle ive just found your channel ❤️🙌 thankyou for your work! Just wondering, the technique in this video, is it quite similar to "somatic tracking " ?(if ypu have heard of that)
You're welcome! I think it is because others have mentioned that, I don't know enough about somatic tracking to say for sure haha
But I wouldn't worry too much about designating differences between techniques, just apply what works :)
So good!
Bedankt! 🤭
Kyle my bro, the volume is much better on this video, good job. Also wondering if you could give me some pointers on what I'm dealing with concerning getting the symptom imperative to stop.
Glad to hear haha!
Not sure I understand your question, could you elaborate?
How can I follow this advice for the symptom of fatigue?
For example, when I stand or walk, should I get excited and do this technique?
I was doing a lot better but recently had food poisoning and now think I’m going through a major relapse. My stomach has started rejecting all food again (I get these surges of awfulness when I eat). I try to do the somatic tracking to stay with my symptoms during these surges and through the pain but struggling. Is this the right approach? My old fears of worrying about what I’m eating and how often are all coming back…plus seeking help from someone else… would have any advice?
Thank you🙏🏼
You're welcome!!
Hi Kyle, do you mean just allow “everything”, any doubt surfacing, any thought, any emotion, any sensation or symptom ?
Yes
Do you have a guided meditation that walks through the process you outline in this video?
Not at the moment, I would suggest maybe just watching this video to get a feel of it and then set time daily to feel into doing it in a way that works for you 🤷🏼♂️
I just can’t deal with my anxiety. It feels like my brain predicts everything I feel and is confused as to why I am so scared all day now. I was diagnosed with pots 7 months ago but am just confused and constantly scared all day about irrational fears but also how I feel and how I felt previously. I can’t seem to get past the idea of acceptance when my brain is always scared and triggered by everything. Whether it’s thinking of being I’ll or comparing to others who have gone to hospital makes me so scared that I will have to even though I won’t as everyone is different and doctors have always been reassured.
I can’t seem to get on with life because due to constant stress that any second something bad will happen and trying jy to exercise and contact friends but just worrying all day. Sometimes it’s so overwhelming I can’t even sit still and can’t watch TV.
I guess my question is how did you deal with the mental side as it feels like my anxiety is the most intense out of the two and lessening it will help massively in my road to complete recovery. I’ve been able to cycle for hours and eat at a restaurant but some days I just feel like being scared and sitting in bed worrying that I’m not safe. As an 18 year old I’m so scared that my body can’t cope with this and just can’t see how I’m going to get my old life back.
What was your daily life and did you ever travel or were you housebound?
Have you tried any sort of talk therapy? I've found that expressing these sorts of feelings out loud to a caring professional can really help to alleviate some of the weight that this anxiety causes. I know that going to a therapist can itself be very anxiety inducing BUT I've always personally felt so much better when I've left. I have been struggling a great deal lately and have not been seeing a professional to talk with and I know it would help me a great deal. I'm going to get back on track with finding someone I feel I can trust and open up to. I hope you can do the same.
Hey man, I can relate to what you're experiencing. Firstly I'll just say that it's ok. It's ok that there is all this fear, it's ok that there is all this anxiety and crazy thoughts. It's really ok and you're not going crazy despite what the thoughts might say. I would suggest really giving yourself some more space to allow these deep fears and emotions to be felt. Don't identify with them but really recognise that it is ok that intense fear is here, you're allowed to feel it. I would recommend the same approach I share in this video for the fear and the thoughts. Also check out some of my other videos about emotion work, I talk a bit more about this.
It's ok if you can't go out and do things sometimes you just need to be alone and feel and process. I spent a lot of time house bound and unable to do any exercise or socialising at all. It was tough at the time but a blessing in the end because it forced me to face all that stuff that was coming up and needed to be felt.
Also like the other commenter mentioned talk therapy can be quite helpful because it allows these emotions to come out.
There's a lot to unpack so if you need additional support I do offer one on one sessions to help people work through their situations. You can email me at kylemeintjes@gmail.com and we could set up a session to work through this stuff. Otherwise yeah any good therapist that resonates with you.
@@life.withkylehey Kyle, what is your best go to video for being with emotions and emotional symptoms. I LOVE your approach. Thank you 🙏
Hmm I really like the Emotion Work playlist from Simply Always Awake, I've shared some of my favourites in the community tab, probably the ones titled Uncomfortable Try This and Granular Emotion Work. Of my videos I think the ones called Compassion Work and Allow Yourself To Feel It All are good for just allowing whatever challenging experience is coming forward @@arieldeangelo8439
@@life.withkylethanks so much!
Hi Kyle, I resonate with the technique and I am starting to do it but I have some doubts. As you are feeling the emotions, thoughts in the body, you are narrating out loud something? or is it just about feeling the sensation without speaking anything? if while doing the technique come tears or strong emotions, we continue with it feeling them? how to know when we can end the technique? because it could become endless and how would be a good way to end it? if when we stop it we feel sadness for example, we do the technique again with that emotion? or it would be advisable to do some more positive visualization to get us out of a possible loop to the resistance of not having managed to minimize any symptom? sorry for so many questions! I do not know if I am explaining myself well as it is not my first language, but any help will be very welcome. Thank you Kyle!
I feel what's important for you is to not overthink this, it's not a complex thing. Just feel. All those questions are just doubt thoughts. You feel the emotion and then doubt is coming up to hold you back from just letting go and feeling, it's all fine but just notice oh I'm getting up in my head about this, what if I let go of all doubts and questions and just allow and feel what comes up. And maybe you need to feel a lot of doubt, that's absolutely fine but just don't hold on to the thoughts and questions, let them just come and go, oh that's just some doubt.
So, you can talk out loud to yourself or not when when doing this. It can be helpful but just do what works best for you. You can feel what ever comes up and you don't need to control or stop it, just allow and soothe and give it lots of love and space :)
@@life.withkyle wow, brilliant Kyle. I realize how unconnected I have been with my body my whole life, living only through my ''head'', rationalizing everything and not allowing myself to feel through my body, which probably played a part in getting me to where I am today. Proof of this is that I am asking you how to do something that seems logical that we would know how to do innately and easily. Thanks for your help and for being there. Big hugs and congratulations on your great journey.
Sorry just a second point. How do you deal with fear of being Ill on top of all of this especially when that’s what triggered everything in the first place?
It really just has to be acknowledged, felt and explored. It's challenging and scary at first but it really is ok to fully feel that fear and just let it come up. Give it compassion and space and allow it to be felt. The technique I describe here is really applicable to any emotion
Don't resist the resistance allow it to be there and show love and compassion it's confusing a little bit to me still it's like I'm not trying I'm just allowing acceptance compassion
That's fine, don't overcomplicate this, it does just feel like allowing
I really struggle with the resitance, i feel it and i think that i dont want to feel it. You made it a little bit more clear for me, is it enough to say i see the part of me that is feeling resistance and you can be here?
Yeah exactly that's great, and then I'd suggest just really trying to feel into that resistance in a gentle way. "Can I explore it a bit more, give it more space to be felt, really explore what it is that can't be felt" It can feel quite restless and uncomfortable but just stay with it as much as possible and notice the resistance thoughts that come up as well "this is too intense" "I can't stay with this" etc. Just thoughts and explore the feelings as you can in a way that works for you :)
Thank you so much for your help🙏🏼
But how do i know if its true acceptance and not from a thought of fixing myself? I am scared that i am doing it wrong
How can I follow this advice for the symptom of fatigue? For example, when I stand or walk, should I get excited and do this technique?