Vaush Reworks The Bible Into a Better Story (Why God is a Mary Sue)
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- Опубликовано: 19 ноя 2024
- Our father who aren't in heaven... Don't watch this video...
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Развлечения
*Vaush:* _"How many nukes can one angel survive?"_
And that's how we started down the Evangelion timeline
evangelion moment
Vergil solos
power-scaling the bible would be a pretty interesting endeavor to undertake.
And in salvation wars tge question is answered
Worth it. Just for the bragging rights.
Bible 2: He's not crucifuckin' around.
The Sequel
"I swear to me, if I see one more fucken' crucifix I'm going to Figtree some motherfuckers.
Do you know how much that sucked?!"
@@SA-mo3hq that sounds like something darkmatter2525 would say
Isn't Bible 2 technically the Quran?
@@InfiniteDeckhand Bible: First of the Undead, Bible 2: The Book of Mormon, Bible 3: Jesus in Space
my man, writing bible fanfiction like dante before him
🇮🇹 🤝 🇮🇪
"the issue with the bible" is a sentence that has started a few wars
Oh boy I sure do love being a Muslim living in the periods between 1095 and 1291 I sure hope no giant religious conflict resulting in the deaths of hundreds of thousands of people occurs
@@SkulloMad that’s when the crusades happened right?
A particular one in Europe lasted for 30 years
@@SkulloMad brother just convert and believe something you’ve never heard of and it’ll all be fine!!!
Unironically look into the original Mesopotamian myths that influenced Judaism and then Christianity (Canaanites are the origin for these faiths, edited for more accuracy). It's a way more interesting story, a humble gardener caring for humans becomes an absolute tyrant
The original Animal Farm
>birthed
"influenced" would be a more appropriate word
@@gunjfur8633 I like birthed more.
@@gunjfur8633 Lay the groundwork for.
is that gilgamesh?
Jordan Peterson: “we need to tell a better story”
Vaush: *this video*
Jordan Peterson: wait no
thicc snek > chaos dragon
"But Satan's got magical powers."
"Yeah, but he's also an emo bitch."
That's Paradise Lost right there.
I could watch an entire video about Vaush learning about how insane Norse Mythology is and planning out how to kill everything in it
Only so much and only so much that cannot be solved with nukes, but fenrir maybe? Big wolfy with the power to eat the sun and has to be contained by magic
That depends. Fenrir was eventually killed via one of Odin’s sons (whose name escapes me) stomping down their lower jaw with a large boot before ripping him in half… god I love how fucking weird Norse Mythology can be…
@@defensivekobra3873 let's see what happens when fenrir wakes up second on a deserted island
Vaush couldn’t kill a medium sized house cat
@@Abysalss he owns a gun
what i like about Vaush is that despite his success he´s stayed down to earth and humble and doesnt have a messiah complex
_Doesn't have a complex messiah_ you mean?
@John Doe eh, somewhat, he is humble and down to earth, but his ego does get the better of him a lot which doesn’t allow him to admit mistakes.
eh, somewhat, he is humble and down to earth, but his ego does get the better of him a lot which doesn’t allow him to admit mistakes.
@@BlueTyphoon2017Example?
„To be sorted“. That was just incredibly unprofessional, and at least he apologized to us for making it so hard to defend him.
4:43 there's this one tale in the bible where this one dude was being persecuted by an army. And according to the Bible, every person has a guardian angel meant to back them up against extreme danger. So this dude's guardian angel, with just a simple thought, defeats this entire army making them all go blind. This isn't necessarily a feat of endurance, but something that can incapacitate an entire army with literally 1% of it's power has got to be just, insanely powerful.
Were all the guardian angels of the soldiers on a family reunion or something, hmmm.
Dude had a stand
Maybe they’re glass cannons and can’t take what a they put out
@@rennnnn914 ig god just liked the dude more and just told the other guardian angels to back off. And besides, they're not dead. Just a little blind :)
@@CPSPD well good luck dealing with the other angels. Guardian angels are really just the pretty faces of the group. Y'know the funny "be not afraid" angel? Well that's one type of angel known as Thrones. In a separate tale of the Bible, some other dude recounts seeing one. And according to him, this thing was HUGE. As big as the entire sky. So these mfs may as well be as big as the Moon. Tell me, do we have enough nukes to destroy the moon? And if we do, do we have enough to destroy a million magic moons?
It took almost a thousand years but finally is here: BIBLE 2: Electric Boogaloo
This time, it personal
Isn't The Torah technically "The Bible 1" and The New Testament is "The Bible 2: Electric Boogaloo"?
@@gogetyourgun1490 and the quoran is Bible 3: Tokyo drift.
@@jizburg The Bible: The Fast and the 4-rious
@@gogetyourgun1490 the bible 5 with a vengeance
I’ll be honest, my favorite take on the Judeo Christian God is YHWH from the Shin Megami Tensei series. He is straight up God. An egotistical self-centered self-righteous law-and-order asshole That is his infinite hubris, Made his name literally unpronounceable. The only thing he cares about is having people follow his laws to the letter and to praise no God other than himself. This is in fact a plot point because gods are demoted into demons (and become killable) when they have no prayer.
You are one of culture I see!
Yo which SMT is this?
@BitterOrange A bit of a correction - that only happens on the law path, where you side with Satan.
YHVH IMMEDIATELY disintegrates Satan, then Aleph (SMT2 protag) punches and kicks YHVH to fucking death.
Lol Gill and Urien from Street fighter are the exact same character as this
@@SamuraIcarus3 They're talking about 2, but YHWH has a fairly significant (though unnamed) role in SMT3, and is the main antagonist of the SMT4 duology.
i’m loving this “Reworking Cristian Lore Saga” so far, wanna see where they go next
The Old Testament has instances where there are other gods, who are real to the people who worship them, and that YHWH just happens to be the most overpowered of them all. Like the part where Aaron threw down Moses' staff and turned it into a snake, the pharaoh's magicians also did it too, but created weaker serpents, that were all defeated by YHWH's power. The other gods in the old testament were made to be super weak.
Exactly. That, and the 2000 years of continued Christian tradition have yielded some pretty metal shit.
damn, and i thought neil gaiman did it first
Yeah, el was the chief god and yahweh and baal were his sons. Then, isrealites merged El's and baal's attributes to yahweh. Yahweh was actually an actual human too. Lived in a mountain, walked, etc. Good book just came out about this called god, an anatomy by Francesca stavrakapoulou
Yes but they were demons this is a theological concept that is not well known to non Christians and even some liberal Christians but according to Christianity all gods that that various cultures have worshiped through history were real spiritual beings but they were demons. More specifically they were angels that were supposed to mediat between God and those cultures but they sided with Satan thus becoming demons.
@@gavindavis9636 this is a Christian view, correct. Paul did state that all gods besides yahweh we're actually demons but the old testament was more monolotrous ie acknowledged other gods but yahweh was the god of the Israelites. Gods being demons came much later after the old testament.
Archaeologically, the ancient Israelites we're polytheists who worshipped El, yahweh and baal with El being the chief god and the father of Yahweh and baal. The scholarly debate is how late and to what extent were the Israelites polytheists. Most say during the monarchic period in the days of David and solomon
The thing with God in Christianity is that he's kind a mess that's always in conflict with himself. He sabotages himself, does one thing, then swings in the opposite direct. You could make Christianity cooler by just diving deeper into that aspect of his character. There's like a Sheogorath/Jygalag story somewhere in there.
That's why I like the gnostic story better, it gives God a decent back story for why he is like that.
At least the greeks were honest and gave their Gods flaws which they aknowledge in their stories.
@@Somerandomguy524 The theoi were meant to represent Greek society as it was seen by the elites, with Zeus as the archetypical Greek patriarch, Hera as the ideal wife, etc. God is decidedly not that.
Also, the myths alone do not paint a completely accurate picture of how the gods were perceived, since the Olympians were also interacted with in a ritual context that has been lost to time.
I remember someone saying that in the Hebrew faith, YHWH was not the only God, he was just the top dog but at some point, references to other deities were replaced with YHWH. This ends up with a very contradictory and seemingly deranged God.
@@IAmDaedem god was the first You Laugh You Lose youtuber
You know I don't mind that God is a marie Sue . But I mind that he only has 2 modes nuclear or turning water in to wine and no in between. The hindu gods are marie sues but they have a couple of "Madara vs the 4 nations" type battles in hindu mythology
Along with Vaush's blackpill that Norse Mythology isn't uniquely cool, its the mythologies of the Abrahamic religions which are extremely boring, here's another: if Norse mythology is so cool while we only have our limited understanding of it from the surviving sources, imagine how many cool stories have been lost to time because Christians came through and almost completely destroyed these unique parts of cultures across Europe (and later in the Americas too). Like how many stories, how much unique culture and such from the Slavic, Greek, Celtic, Norse, etc mythologies has been lost because Christians were incapable of accepting that other people didn't believe in their shitty set of stories?
Christians are like a shitty fandom
mfs will literally say "gods plan" and "free will" back to back as if theyre not contradictory
All of this is answered in Neon Genesis: Evangelion I.e. how many Nukes an Angel can resist.
Answer:
EVERY MISSILE HIT THE TARGET!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!
Except instead of nukes it's fucked up teenagers.
The Mahābhārata and Ramayana stories are much longer than the Bible and many times more epic. I'm not Hindu, nor have I read much, but from what I've seen in my research for other videos about India, there are superpowers, huge wars, monkey people. I'd love a stream watching Vaush checking out other mythologies and religions stories. The Bible was absolutely a mishmash of older stories.
This is why anime always make Satan into a Prometheus like figure, he at least has a narrative arc.
I think that dates back to John Milton's Paradise Lost and the narrative of the rebellious Lucifer, having risen up to dethrone god but failed an being condemned to become Satan, the king of hell.
Honestly in this as well as Dante we can see that christian fanfiction tries to compensate hard and does at times succeed.
I honestly think one of the most damning arguments against the existence of God is just how badly he translates from a story to real life. In a story, it makes sense that an all powerful creator would allow evil to exist, because without evil there wouldn't be any conflict, and without conflict it would be a pretty shit story, especially if the intent is to teach people the moral values of the community. But take that same creator and put them in reality, and suddenly they seem like a tyrant who knows they can stop all the evils in the world but chooses not too for their own sick pleasure. (Sidenote, its pretty telling when one of God's titles is the Lord of Hosts. Hosts means the angelic armies of heaven, he's the LORD OF ARMIES)
The same thing is true for Satan: its easier to talk about the concept of evil by giving it a face and name and say "Oh you know that horrible thing you did, that was this guy tempting you. But don't listen to him or you'll go to hell". But in real life, Satan becomes either sympathetic or just hard to understand. He could be sympathised with as someone rebelling against an oppressive tyrant or as a creature damned to be the personification of evil, since if everything is God's creation that includes Satan so Satan has no choice but to be evil. The unsympathetic angle is that he has the free will to be good but chooses evil to rebel against God, otherwise why does he care if mankind commits evil? I guess more people go to hell and he gets enjoyment from us doing evil and then being punished for it, but even that seems like a pretty weak reason.
My point is that these things work in a story where a lot of them are just metaphors and allegories for abstract concepts, but trying to say they're real entities suddenly makes things a whole lot harder to justify.
Agreed
Heavily agree. Imo I think the how folks engage with the Bible being a real thing and not an assortment of narratives meant to try and tell a point by different people, regions and time makes it way less intresting and shallow. It boils down to "Accept God or go to hell".
The real life changing of certain points in the book and how they come to our modern understanding is very intriguing. That's because people are intriguing.
If the Bible was more badass like an epic fantasy book I bet more people would be Christian
Isn’t that what C.S. Lewis tried to write with Chronicles of Narnia?
L. Ron Hubbard would like to speak with you
Look up the fight between Samson and 1000 Philistines, and Ehud vs 600 men. The Bible has actually has some lit fights, it's just that screen writers are forced by many of these conservative Christians to only make family friendly stories when they adapt the Bible.
Nope, we’d just have more suicide bombers in our religion…
And school shooters…
Mentioning Odin. He was told of his doom by a soothsayer, but by acting in fear he causes the forces of ragnarok to exist.
So just like the Kronos myth?
Man, why did we ever drop these myths? People would learn way better life lessons from "don't act out of paranoia and turn your fears into a self-fulfilling prophecy" than "pray to God to press the win button and eternally condemn everyone who disagrees with you".
@@FelisImpurrator Good is not easy, easy is not good I guess.
I've been saying God Is OP for YEARS!
Nerf God please
So, I'm going to rewrite the bible, better characters, less mary sues and some epic angels vs. demons stuff!
Maybe I drop all the stupid bigotry and that slavery stuff, but more kinky sexy stuff!
Best thing, the copyright is long gone!
ill take 1000 copies
and you can actually sell signed copies too
The Abrahamic faiths have a lot of interesting aspects, but they only get to shine if you retool the meta
Idk about all that. I think the most influential addition to the meta was the Islamic expansion. That one really shook up Christian dominance in the Abrahamic servers. Simply adding perspectives can result in engaging gameplay without having to retool the whole meta or nerf anyone
What if Thor was responsible for the widespread use of plastic around the world, playing the long game
"Why God is a Mary sue" is a phrase I didn't know I needed to hear
The movie Dogma does a good job of making the catholic cannon seem cool.
Mom, I want cool badass Norse mythology
Mom: we have mythology at home
Mythology at home: Bible
now to be fair, christinaity started as a simewhat peaceful religion
@0:24 Idk man the Bible has actually had some pretty awesome fight moments. Samson defeating 1,000 men with a Donkey's jaw bone. Ehud killing 600 men with a sheep's shard. Also in Daniel 10, Gabriel was held back in a fight with "The Prince of Persia" (understood to mean Satan) for 21 days, before Michael the Arch Angel (Depending on Theology is understood to mean Jesus) helped him.
Also let's not forget about all of the psychedelic visions involving "The Dragon" (understood to be Satan by many Christians), and other monster in both Revelation and Daniel. I think the Bible has some really great stories, that if shown in all its violence and gore would be awesome. It's just that Christians keep putting limits on film writers who try to make movies about these stories.
I only knew about Samson because of SAO abridged lol
My favorite part of this discourse is how it glosses over that all the polytheistic religions I looked into have the gods embracing humans getting knowledge. The Abrahamic ones starts with us getting banished from the garden of Eden for biting into the fruit of knowledge 😅
Consider: the core message of the Bible is that you are supposed to be mindless chattle in the name of god
When you watch the Spirit Science video and then see new Vaush Pit but it's just a clip from the main channel
😔
The Bible is an ok series, with a toxic fandom.
lol
Truth.
I like to think there is a secret entrance to Hell in the Mariana Trench
Does this means Japan is the "eye of terror"?
Thank you for using your platform to bring attention to this. It’s not talked about enough. Hail Lucifer.
In the name of the father, son, and holy ghost, head, shoulders, knees, and toes, turn up ur nose, strike that pose, heeeeyyyyy Macarena
💜bb
Satan:Fuck you dad!
God:SHINIGAMI CHOP!
Vaush learning about Norse mythology is pretty entertaining. Loki has some wild kids, Vaush. Really wild.
Vaush should check out The Salvation War, basically a Biblical military fanfic where God gives up on humanity, unleashes Hell on Earth… and after a few days of shock, humanity rallies and its combined military and technological might fucking curbstomps the demonic armies. Then they invade Hell. THEN, in the sequel, they turn their vengeful eyes on HEAVEN.
And the way he writes it? Fucking plausible lol
As far as fiction goes, the Bible is even worse than an R.L. Stine book. Absolutely no creative energy went into that.
Imagine the massive plot twist during the Rapture Arc where it's actually most of the Evangelical Conservatives that are left on earth to battle Lucifer?
They should nerf God! the game is unbalanced!
Have you tried an arcane-bleed build?
idk, the demi-fiend could kick his bitch ass and Kazuya/Abel's war against him seems to work out pretty well.
some quirked up anime rpg bois would like a word
bible review: needs more anime
If Ragnarok comes we're all fucked. The planet sized serpent is just the half of it, we also have to deal with Fenrir, who is said to be so large that his lower jaw scrapes the earth while his upper jaw reaches the heavens. Then there's his two sons, Skoll and Hati, who will devour the sun and moon. There's Surtr, who will engulf the world in flame using his sword (keep in mind that Surtr comes from Muspelheim, the realm of fire where all heat in the universe, including the stars and the sun, comes from). Before Ragnarok even starts we've gotta survive Fimblwinter, basically a 3 year long global winter.
just hit em with the good ol' left-right-goodnight
Is the global winter mandatory, cuz global warming kinda already stopped that for good
@@lucky-segfault I mean its meant to be what heralds in Ragnarok, killing off pretty much all life to leave the earth an empty battleground for the war to be fought on. So its probably mandatory.
Omg just thought of a sick idea for a comic/video game: you're a human trying to survive in the apocalyptic hellscape of Revelation while cosmic forces are battling it out.
No way they called it fimblwinter, they were doing so good
Love when Vaush streams go in this direction !!
There is an apocryphal story where the magicians of the Pharaoh who taunted Aaron and Moses clad themselves in magical talismans and shitstomped several layers of heaven, and only lost because Metatron tricked them into removing their own protections.
The apocrypha in general are more interesting than the original text, probably by design because those authors had similar critiques to Vaush, but saw more potential in the original text.
i remember Jacob wrestled with God an for some reason God had to cheat to win, so yeah the author never had an idea of how to keep Gods power level consisted, hell Lucifer barelly killed around 10 people canonically, Lucifer is a shit tier villain that the author almost forgot towards the end of the story, only returning for the final arc
really, the best thing about Lucifer is that his origins inspired Morgoth (Melkor) an thats about it, Lucifer has no feats worth mentioning
“How many nukes can an angel survive?” (4:45)
I would have to say 2. You gotta use a trinity of nukes to take out an Angel.
New favorite yt vid just dropped
I'm very sad to tell to most of the people here that a lot of what you would consoder the cool parts of christianity were not actually parts of the original story and were basically canonized fanfics, demonology, paradise lost, the 7 circles of hell
Correction, they're not in the text. That does not necessarily mean they aren't Christian. That's a lie Orthodox theologians would have you believe. Also, early Christianity was situated in a context in which things like demons and magic were considered a given and were believed in by everyone, not just Christians. So basically, early Christians had things like protective amulets, demon exorcisms, and stuff like that.
Jacob wrestled with God until daybreak and wouldn't let him go til God blessed him, God GAVE UP and renamed the dude Israel. We can totally kick the devil's ass in the end times
By any metric God is portrayed as a tyrant and autocrat, who loves you in so far you are loyal, the way heaven is organized is clearily incompatible with the concept of democracy, God is not good because he does good things, God is good because he is God and because he gets to decide what good is. And so on and so forth.
Christianity is BORING? Do I need to get some biblically accurate angels in here?
🎶dooon… deenö…. Doon…duh….
The Edas (the oldest sources we have for Norse mythology) weren't written until AFTER Scandinavia was fully christianized. So imagine how much MORE metal they were before they had to shoehorn in Baldur being Jesus and such shit.
I’m a Christian, but I find this pretty hilarious
@@matt5004 Lol please stop your "No True Scotsman" fallacious claims. Christianity as a religion has way too many denominations, hermeneutics, theologies; even theodicy argument, and basic conflict over what is considered 'acceptable' Liturgy; to make a claim that that anonymous commenter is not a Christian.
@@matt5004 bro, the pope is the Hokage of christians.
@@matt5004 Only if he'd said, "I'm a TRUE Christian." Then you could argue that there's no such thing. But all he said was that he's a Christian, and assuming he's a member of one of the myriads of Christian institutions and at least believe in the basic faith of Christianity he's legally a Christian and there's nothing you or anyone else can say about it.
Let’s be real folks, the devil is the dark anti-hero of the Bible. How are people gonna choose good if they don’t have the option to choose evil?
- john milton, before writing paradise lost
@@narikobeilschmidt Hey, Milton's Lucifer is a based freethinking chad.
@@FelisImpurrator Until he kinda isn't.
Also, the Devil is barely a character in the Bible. Later Christians vastly overstate his role.
That's actually true, in fact the whole point, though, the devil is truly evil and no anti-hero, as he rejected God on his own from pure hatred for him and humanity. It is impossible to have good without evil. But I ask this. Do you think man needs the devil to be evil, or are they fully capable of it themselves?
@@Ass_of_Amalek The Bible indicates that it's humans who are responsible for all suffering, not God. The whole point of the Garden of Eden myth is to show God as a benevolent ruler who allows us the freedom to do what we want.
Bible 2: Return of the Lich King 🧟♂️ 👑
The Jews also have Lilith, which is a way cooler story than the re-written Adam and Eve where they pretend Lilith (the first woman) didn't exist before Eve, and they also turn the snake into an actual Satan-snake, instead of it being a half snake lady (which is Lilith when she returns to the garden).
They also have like, humans, angels and then the 3rd one is Jinn...
Oh wait that's Islam... I dunno if that's Jewish too. In Islam, Jinn existed before man... anyhoo.
excerpt from the book of ian in the new new testament
Happy 100k on the Vaush-Pit
The other thing you could have done is make him chaotic neutral. They already say he creates good and evil, so just make him give hummanity free will and get popcorn, making things more interesting here and there.
Bro the Upanishads are the most lit ancient scripture. Great story arc.
Vaush just wrote the plot for SMT VI
Horse Mythology > Norse Mythology
I think of the three main Abrahamic religions Judaism's the most interesting.
Christianity is about blind faith to God.
Islam is about submission to God.
Judaism is about getting into a ton of arguments and playing lawyer with God. What the Abrahamic faiths lack in action between powerful yet fallible beings, Judaism makes up for with battles of wits against an omnipotent being.
Also there's some whacky shit in Kabbalah about how God is actually limited by the existence of his own creation and humans have some power to affect that which is well above my understanding of Judaism.
As an Ex Muslim you are almost correct about Islam. It is more Blind Submission to God with no question asked, wether you want to or not.
Judaism is fascist idea that they are superior beings chosen by god and how other humans caste in life is to be their servants.
We finally reached 100k in the 2nd channel. While we are stil somewhat of forming a government on our own with this result we would have become a strong 3rd place in the 2022 Maltese general elections.
Where’s the movie adaptation for the Vaush Bible? We need it
YHWH, the original debate bro
That's why the Old Testament is such a more interesting read than the New Testament. The early Jews weren't monotheistic, they were henotheistic, The other gods the Israelites encountered were real entities that Adonai had to show dominance over. Adonai is also not explicitly stated to be Omnipotent. His plans are routinely interrupted by the activities of man. He sends the angel of death to destroy the Israelites and then that angel gets btfo'd by Aaron of all people. Adonai is merely the most powerful being on the planet, making deals with a people He became fond of and working to give them a land of their own while establishing his supremacy over all of the other Gods his creation worships.
From a story point of view- yes the OT has more story’s and more crazy stories at that! But the OT clearly states that THE LORD is the creator God and and is all powerful, MANY verses to back this up- he isn’t just veiwed as a powerful God, BUT THE powerful God. But yes they definitely believed in other entities and gods that were out there. The Bible says that those gods were apart of the fallen angels from heaven. Even the New Testament acknowledges this- Paul when talking about the pagan gods says “the so called gods (meaning in a mocking tone that the gods these people worship have no power) he then goes one to say “indeed there are many gods and lords” meaning he acknowledges that there are many beings out there with power and influence in this world, they aren’t gods in the sense that they made the universe but they have influence. If you are interested in this I recommend Michael Heisers UNSEEN REALM- and the Bible projects podcast on GOD and ancient cosmology- also their video on spiritual beings.
I'm still laughing at the idea of americans firing their AR-15 at Odin LMAO
he was so real for this one, so true!
I mean canonically, Odin is a bit like Batman but with the addition of magical runes. Drinking from the well of Mimir gave him a sort of limited omniscience, he has seen all that is and will come to pass. What i'm saying is, give him enough prep-time and he would be veeeery hard for us to kill. Even with nukes.
He'd be on our side anyway, right?
@@patrikvajgel240 ye but vaush stated, "we could kill him" and i just wanted to make clear how that would probably be a bad idea
@@LordZeebee yeah I agree
Literally every other religion has way cooler stories than what's in the Bible.
Plot twist everyone went to heaven in the 90’s this is the rapture
This is one of the best Vaush segments
I now want something like "The Deicide Podcast," where a bunch of people talk about if/how humanity could feasibly defeat various mythological beings.
Even tho we have very few sources, norse (or I guess broadly speaking germanic) mythology is far more interesting and the characters actually have depth to them.
HOW STRONG DOES HE THINK GUNS AND NUKES ARE NORSE GODS BLOOD CREATED ALL OF SPACE AND TIME THE WORLD SEPENT CAN HARM THE TREE OF CREATION HOW DO WE WIN?
Bro odin is insane universal becaus he kild a guy big enough to build the universe out of and together wit two other guys draged him aroud. O and he has a spell that makes him emune to ALL weapons and tre spells that make him immortal...
I’ve been writing my own retelling of the Bible where God is incredibly powerful, but not nearly as powerful as he tells everyone, and Lucifer, who is almost his equal, VERY NEARLY beat him in his uprising at the end of a very extensive battle before getting beaten and stuck with the job of processing sinful souls in Hell so they can be purified and move on to Heaven.
The angels, incidentally, can shift between humanoid forms (which are usually very bishie because I am a degenerate) and divine forms (which look like Bayonetta-esque eldritch beings covered in eyes and wings and tentacles). A lot of characters will get more depth like the Archangels, Lilith is gonna be there ‘cause she’s awesome, Behemoth, Leviathan, and Ziz are gonna exist as minor gods of the land, sea, and sky, the EGYPTIAN gods (who are in fact acknowledged in the Bible) are gonna show up and potentially get pwned by YHWH during Exodus- like, how much cooler would Exodus be if it were set amidst a battle between God and the Egyptian gods? Moses calls upon God to send the plagues, meanwhile the Egyptian priests are calling upon their gods to defend themselves, and on the celestial plane, angels and monsters are shredding each other, Michael is duking it out with Horus; it’s gonna be wild.
The details are too long to list in one comment, though, especially when we start getting into how the cosmic forces of Chaos and Order work, along with the worlds of Heaven and Hell, and how nonbelievers who are still generally good people can become citizens of Pandemonium in Hell and join Lucifer’s demon army for the rebellion… But I’m drawing a lot from fanfics like Paradise Lost, weird apocryphal works, and a lot of stuff I just made up myself (as Christians have been doing since the dawn of Christianity).
Yeah, we’re gonna start our own Christian sect, and we’ll be the ones with the _cool_ Bible. And we’ll actually unilaterally make good on the whole “caring for the poor and marginalized” thing. >.>
God is original OP
Nice 100K subs congrats !
congratulations for 100 k subs :3
Angels have mind powers and look so alien that they have to say be not afraid, everytime they show up.
Vaush really needs to play an shin megami tensei game. He's so close to describing the plots of that series
If you want a good story from the bible I recommend the conflict between Saul and David
This kinda sounds like Evangelion actually
10:17 The way Vaush lectures Loki like Loki is a student of his and is in the same room!😂😂😂
the most impressive thing that Angels have done in the bible is start an Earthquake and then raise a zombie army (yes that happened in the bible). sure killing a bunch of people is a feat in its own right, but they clearly have power over natural events/disasters aswell as some degree of control over life and death.
In the Zoroastrian endtimes (which Christianity took HEAVY inspiration) there is indeed a force of good and a force for evil and they are in constant war. During a person's life they either live a life that puts them on the good side or the bad side. When the endtime comes the forces of good and evil clash in one last battle to determine the final fate of everything
This is the Vaush content I've been missing
Christianity 2 is gonna be lit🔥🔥
dystopia idea: in 2000 years, the main religion is Potterism, wherein ppl believe that Harry Potter was a description of real events that actually took place. Imagine having to put up with that.
I’m writing my own telling of the biblical apocalypse and it’s an epic battle
God is just some mf in creative mode
i pictured my jesus as like the lead singer of lynard skynard and im in the front row hammered drunk
Today I played Majora’s Mask and listened to arguments on nuking Satan. Things went differently than I thought they would
I think Cyanide and Happiness made this into a video game already.
He just wants to add a tournament arc to the Bible.