Trauma happens when we can't absorb the full reality - because the full reality is so big and horrible it would destroy us. When we are too small to handle an overwhelming evil, we break everything down to survive. Some of it we burry, some of it we frame as us being the problem.... whatever we do to get by. We end up turning ourselves into disjointed pieces of a person. To overcome trauma, we must learn to put our fractured sense of self back together so we can be whole. All healing takes place inside Oneness. G-d is One.
I couldn’t say it better! That happened to me and it would have killed me as a child,they almost did but I made it. People that haven’t been thru these horrors can’t understand,some of my experiences I didn’t realise they happened until I had my own kids.
@@silverlining6259 I'm so glad you made it! It sounds like a miracle you survived and what a blessing that you are now the silver lining for all of us!
What I get from Rabbi Manis Friedman is, we are bigger than our problems. A person that does not acknowledge your beauty does not have the authority to address your ugliness. The scriptures teach you must heal others for their sake and not your own. It’s about awareness and not social correction.
Great quote. "A person that does not acknowledge your beauty has no authority to address your ugliness." Most times one's journey towards wholeness will be continued alone when a "good doctor" gets side-tracked or there is a disconnect. Trust is an evolving thing so yeah may need to trust oneself when that happens. Love your comment. .
It's interesting to see old school thinking meeting with the younger generation's idea of trauma. There's certainly more literature on it by now, but that doesn't necessarily correlate with a better understanding of it in general. Everyone wants to believe their problems are a lot bigger than they really are. At all levels.
I can easily see why rape, war, kidnapping and hostage taking are not personal and should not be taken personally. They are finite incidences. But if someone deliberately and actively causes sterility/infertility, even if you are not the only one, there is no remedy for that. The act of involuntary sterilization is very personal, so how can it be taken impersonally? And even if it is “impersonal” the damage is the same and it is for life. A woman’s instinct and desire to have children is primal. What’s your remedy, Rabbi Friedman? Don’t say, “You can always adopt.”
You could ask your question directly by joining the VIP discussion group Rabbi Friedman leads. I think he might respond by laying out the difference between "existence" and "life". He uses these terms in a very specific way, which I found very surprising, as I am not Jewish, and it took me a while to wrap my head around. I found him explaining them at minute 32 and following in this discussion: ruclips.net/video/lFuOP75_OrI/видео.html Apart from that, it doesn't seem that all sterilization operations in females are irreversible. One common method called "tubal sterilization" can be reversed surgically. Maybe others might follow during the lifetime of a woman being victim of this crime? But even if you underwent a forced sterilization, which was not reversible, it would still mean that your "existence" as defined by Rabbi Friedman would be miserable, yet your "life" couldn't be ruined by it. This is not said to belittle the victim's pain, but to transform it and liberate...
How ridiculous can you get? What is the context of what Jordan Peterson was talking about. Even Mannis Freedman one of my favorites says he doesn't know what Petersons point is. You have the middle of a conversation less than 60 seconds and Mannis is supposed to figure out what is being talked about. Was Peterson talking about what someone else was talking about?
It does alter the size of the problem, when you minimise it, it's only when you think about something or remember it you get upset aswell.. the word trauma is over used!
Cyrulnik would concur, that as horrible, say, middle school was, we tend to remember the good times and have forgotten the bad ones, and that seems resiliently healthy.
Wait...the solution is to minimize our trauma? That...doesn't...make...sense. So many times people are traumatized precisely because they were told to "get over it" and had their feelings or perceptions minimized.
That’s not what he’s saying. Basically he’s saying to talk to a person you deeply trust about the trauma. Work with the person to yes, minimize the trauma, in other words, put the trauma in a better perspective that allows you to make it smaller on your own.
When perverted individuals hurt someone it has nothing to do with the victim. It is only the fault of the perpetrator, that is what the rabbi is saying. The victim needs to hear that there is nothing wrong with them which made them the target because internally victims tend to feel at fault, which is crazy but it happens. That is what it means to minimize. “This terrible thing that happened was not your fault, and there is nothing wrong within you that attracted this. You were taken advantage by a perverted individual because they had the circumstances to do so. And yes, this individuals will do it again to someone else if they have the chance. So, it is not about YOU, because there is nothing wrong with you that attracted this. Everything is wrong within the perpetrator. So, it takes time, work and the help of someone you trust to heal. But, the point is to heal and thrive . As a survivor of abuse, I came to realize this things. I know thrive in my happy fulfilled life after I realized it was them not me ; and I refused to continue feeling as a victim of a crazy person. And of course, Justice should always be served in the external so this Perverted individuals are stopped from hurting others. ❤ good day!
If an experience incurs a life-long disability such as meniere's disease, which is often caused by stress for example, I believe it still qualifies as true trauma warranting a proportionate settlement. You can say "depersonalize it" all you want, but the disease incurred remains. That person's life will never be the same again, so there is a fine line. PS: Next disclosure's in 5 days.
7:24 Manis Friedman AGAIN disappoints with his take on traumatic experiences (see also his comparison of trauma through s**ual ab**e with having a diarrhea). Lots of jewish spiritual leaders lack in empathy regarding trauma. To "get over it" is, if even fully possible, a result of decades of therapy and struggling. How heart crushing must it be to come to your rabbi confessing a heavy trauma in hopes of getting help and soothing advice and then hear this kind of stuff. Tell a person who's got s**ually ab**ed as a child to "not take it personal and be wise"... Come on. And the core issue about trauma is NOT about taking it personally - it's about sth. really bad happened to you that you got no control over, your sacred free will and consent having no effect and it haunts you and seeps into many aspects of your life because your memory + nervous system is impacted by it and your body keeps that score. Soll er gezunt bleiben!
Too simple...It doesn't work that way... So much knowledge missing, sorry to tell you Rabbi... It's so much more complex... And by the way, the only one we can trust 100% and through whom we can heal is Hashem...in the Name of Yeshua Hamashiaj for sure. And of course it's personal, as we are uniques for Him, He helps us to heal in a very unique and personal way.
John 4 31Meanwhile his disciples urged him, “Rabbi, eat something.” 32But he said to them, “I have food to eat that you know nothing about.” 33Then his disciples said to each other, “Could someone have brought him food?” RABBI WORD HAS NOT BEEN SOWN YET
Your fabricated fl"Rabbi" is but a character found only in the Greek Tall Tales of Heathen Man/NT and Joe Smith Jr's Book of Mormon, just like his sidekick the Greco-Roman Devil with his lake of fire, fabrications of Heathen Man.
Peterson speaks in such an overcaffeinated way that it can be difficult or impossible to really know what he actually meant. I am not sure what his point is supposed to be.
Peterson isn't very bright. Much of what he says is word salad. Many in his following are either young, or never went to college, so Peterson impresses those kinds of people with his "intelligence;" which is mostly bs.
@@brynawaldman5790 The men can have babies crowd has spoken. Tell that to the thousands who attended his classes and graduated college, not to mention all the patients he helped. Why is J-TV picking a fight with JP?
You have to understand that this is an outtake from a lecture. It’s a part if his maps of meaning lecture series that he had taught for 20 years at different universities (13 part 2 hours each). A little clip is not enough to convey his points
@@skumflum3768 I, for one, have listened to lots of JP clips. Lots. He thinks his values are universal truths & wants to force them on everyone else. Telling boys to clean their rooms may be a good thing, but this guy is fomenting violence & persecution upon more than one marginalized groups. There are fascists who clean their rooms.
Trauma happens when we can't absorb the full reality - because the full reality is so big and horrible it would destroy us. When we are too small to handle an overwhelming evil, we break everything down to survive. Some of it we burry, some of it we frame as us being the problem.... whatever we do to get by. We end up turning ourselves into disjointed pieces of a person.
To overcome trauma, we must learn to put our fractured sense of self back together so we can be whole. All healing takes place inside Oneness. G-d is One.
I couldn’t say it better!
That happened to me and it would have killed me as a child,they almost did but I made it.
People that haven’t been thru these horrors can’t understand,some of my experiences I didn’t realise they happened until I had my own kids.
@@silverlining6259 I'm so glad you made it! It sounds like a miracle you survived and what a blessing that you are now the silver lining for all of us!
Such a kind and wise presence is Rabbi🙏🙏🙏
What I get from Rabbi Manis Friedman is, we are bigger than our problems. A person that does not acknowledge your beauty does not have the authority to address your ugliness. The scriptures teach you must heal others for their sake and not your own. It’s about awareness and not social correction.
Great quote. "A person that does not acknowledge your beauty has no authority to address your ugliness."
Most times one's journey towards wholeness will be continued alone when a "good doctor" gets side-tracked or there is a disconnect. Trust is an evolving thing so yeah may need to trust oneself when that happens. Love your comment.
.
Loved this. Thank you 😊
Thank you, Rabbi.
Maybe Rabbi Manis' side should be resized to fit better
Mania needs no resizing to spread light
Thank you
You're welcome
It's interesting to see old school thinking meeting with the younger generation's idea of trauma. There's certainly more literature on it by now, but that doesn't necessarily correlate with a better understanding of it in general.
Everyone wants to believe their problems are a lot bigger than they really are. At all levels.
The question is WHERE one can ACTUALLY find such a mentor whom one can truly trust! Where?
❤ I trust Rabbi freidman and G-d , they both challenge me , and help me clarify who might be a local mentor ❤
I can easily see why rape, war, kidnapping and hostage taking are not personal and should not be taken personally. They are finite incidences. But if someone deliberately and actively causes sterility/infertility, even if you are not the only one, there is no remedy for that. The act of involuntary sterilization is very personal, so how can it be taken impersonally? And even if it is “impersonal” the damage is the same and it is for life. A woman’s instinct and desire to have children is primal. What’s your remedy, Rabbi Friedman? Don’t say, “You can always adopt.”
You could ask your question directly by joining the VIP discussion group Rabbi Friedman leads. I think he might respond by laying out the difference between "existence" and "life". He uses these terms in a very specific way, which I found very surprising, as I am not Jewish, and it took me a while to wrap my head around.
I found him explaining them at minute 32 and following in this discussion:
ruclips.net/video/lFuOP75_OrI/видео.html
Apart from that, it doesn't seem that all sterilization operations in females are irreversible. One common method called "tubal sterilization" can be reversed surgically. Maybe others might follow during the lifetime of a woman being victim of this crime?
But even if you underwent a forced sterilization, which was not reversible, it would still mean that your "existence" as defined by Rabbi Friedman would be miserable, yet your "life" couldn't be ruined by it. This is not said to belittle the victim's pain, but to transform it and liberate...
How ridiculous can you get? What is the context of what Jordan Peterson was talking about. Even Mannis Freedman one of my favorites says he doesn't know what Petersons point is.
You have the middle of a conversation less than 60 seconds and Mannis is supposed to figure out what is being talked about. Was Peterson talking about what someone else was talking about?
It does alter the size of the problem, when you minimise it, it's only when you think about something or remember it you get upset aswell.. the word trauma is over used!
The salient good Rabbi Manis is again 100% correct.
Cyrulnik would concur, that as horrible, say, middle school was, we tend to remember the good times and have forgotten the bad ones, and that seems resiliently healthy.
Grief. Trauma brings grief.
Thank you Rabbi Friedman on trauma and reaction. Not having an over reaction to avoid panic. TRUST is essential
Wait...the solution is to minimize our trauma? That...doesn't...make...sense. So many times people are traumatized precisely because they were told to "get over it" and had their feelings or perceptions minimized.
That’s not what he’s saying. Basically he’s saying to talk to a person you deeply trust about the trauma. Work with the person to yes, minimize the trauma, in other words, put the trauma in a better perspective that allows you to make it smaller on your own.
When perverted individuals hurt someone it has nothing to do with the victim. It is only the fault of the perpetrator, that is what the rabbi is saying. The victim needs to hear that there is nothing wrong with them which made them the target because internally victims tend to feel at fault, which is crazy but it happens. That is what it means to minimize. “This terrible thing that happened was not your fault, and there is nothing wrong within you that attracted this. You were taken advantage by a perverted individual because they had the circumstances to do so. And yes, this individuals will do it again to someone else if they have the chance. So, it is not about YOU, because there is nothing wrong with you that attracted this. Everything is wrong within the perpetrator. So, it takes time, work and the help of someone you trust to heal. But, the point is to heal and thrive . As a survivor of abuse, I came to realize this things. I know thrive in my happy fulfilled life after I realized it was them not me ; and I refused to continue feeling as a victim of a crazy person. And of course, Justice should always be served in the external so this
Perverted individuals are stopped from hurting others. ❤ good day!
"I don't understand what his point is." did you forget to cut that statement out of the video? I would recommend thinking before making the video.
Rabbi missed the point of the first part. How do you not see the point ??
If an experience incurs a life-long disability such as meniere's disease, which is often caused by stress for example, I believe it still qualifies as true trauma warranting a proportionate settlement. You can say "depersonalize it" all you want, but the disease incurred remains. That person's life will never be the same again, so there is a fine line. PS: Next disclosure's in 5 days.
So abuse, rape, etc..not personal?? Please help me make sense of that.
Rabi freeman is Not addressing real trauma. Here..this is a definition of oversensitivity or psuedo trauma. . I'm sorry he is misleading here..
Theory and practise make the difference...😒
Does Rabbi Friedman have the guts to help people outside of the Jewish people? or just lip serves?
Ask him
Here speaks a man who has never really know trauma! Don’t ignore it or run from it face it.
❤ how do you face it ? And if you don't ru how do you live to face it ?
7:24 Manis Friedman AGAIN disappoints with his take on traumatic experiences (see also his comparison of trauma through s**ual ab**e with having a diarrhea).
Lots of jewish spiritual leaders lack in empathy regarding trauma. To "get over it" is, if even fully possible, a result of decades of therapy and struggling. How heart crushing must it be to come to your rabbi confessing a heavy trauma in hopes of getting help and soothing advice and then hear this kind of stuff.
Tell a person who's got s**ually ab**ed as a child to "not take it personal and be wise"... Come on.
And the core issue about trauma is NOT about taking it personally - it's about sth. really bad happened to you that you got no control over, your sacred free will and consent having no effect and it haunts you and seeps into many aspects of your life because your memory + nervous system is impacted by it and your body keeps that score.
Soll er gezunt bleiben!
Too simple...It doesn't work that way... So much knowledge missing, sorry to tell you Rabbi... It's so much more complex...
And by the way, the only one we can trust 100% and through whom we can heal is Hashem...in the Name of Yeshua Hamashiaj for sure.
And of course it's personal, as we are uniques for Him, He helps us to heal in a very unique and personal way.
John 4
31Meanwhile his disciples urged him, “Rabbi, eat something.”
32But he said to them, “I have food to eat that you know nothing about.”
33Then his disciples said to each other, “Could someone have brought him food?”
RABBI WORD HAS NOT BEEN SOWN YET
Your fabricated fl"Rabbi" is but a character found only in the Greek Tall Tales of Heathen Man/NT and Joe Smith Jr's Book of Mormon, just like his sidekick the Greco-Roman Devil with his lake of fire, fabrications of Heathen Man.
Peterson speaks in such an overcaffeinated way that it can be difficult or impossible to really know what he actually meant.
I am not sure what his point is supposed to be.
Peterson isn't very bright. Much of what he says is word salad. Many in his following are either young, or never went to college, so Peterson impresses those kinds of people with his "intelligence;" which is mostly bs.
@@brynawaldman5790 The men can have babies crowd has spoken. Tell that to the thousands who attended his classes and graduated college, not to mention all the patients he helped. Why is J-TV picking a fight with JP?
@@brynawaldman5790 ruclips.net/video/JM2o9e-pwoE/видео.html
You have to understand that this is an outtake from a lecture. It’s a part if his maps of meaning lecture series that he had taught for 20 years at different universities (13 part 2 hours each). A little clip is not enough to convey his points
@@skumflum3768 I, for one, have listened to lots of JP clips. Lots. He thinks his values are universal truths & wants to force them on everyone else. Telling boys to clean their rooms may be a good thing, but this guy is fomenting violence & persecution upon more than one marginalized groups.
There are fascists who clean their rooms.
Peterson;" I have dreams of my grandmother's hairy pubic region. Please buy my new book!"
The Rabbi:" Huh? May God help you in life...some how."