I’d be curious to see the emoji in question. When he said grimace, I pictured 😬, which actually pops up as a suggestion when you type that word. A wry smile seems like it would be the smirk 😏 emoji perhaps. Certainly hard to confuse an obvious grimace for a smile either way.
Yo he used only 16min and explained everything consistently and clearly. Literally by 5 to 7min you can already get the whole case. What an amazingly scripted channel. Great analysis as well!
“Why didn’t she just leave?” is the typical question of someone who has no idea about how domestic violence works. When an abuser hits a woman, he has already destroyed her emotionally before, so she doesn’t rebel.
@@katherinerosemore274 that's true, but it doesn't mean all women will or can leave. There's so many factors at play, starting with something as simple as person's personality. Survivors of domestic abuse carry out risk assessments all the time- and research is clear on the fact that the abuse increases significantly when the person wants to leave/leaves.
She was also seen by a SANE nurse months before she killed him. That nurse said that in her entire career at a SANE, 15+ years, she had never seen such severe injuries to a victims vulva as she had seen on Nicky. That’s crazy. I don’t understand why the prosecutor couldn’t see that. Additionally, he had been threatening to shoot her in her sleep and in such a way that she would be aware of her surroundings but unable to move and that she would be dependent on him for care. A number of those searches were related to this very thing. I will never be convinced that she had any other option. If she had left, I believe he would have come looking fo her and probably killed her or worse.
As a nurse myself, that is exactly what is suspicious. Never have seen injuries like that? This woman was getting injured that severely on the regular and could still walk around normally? It is very much a red flag to keep in mind when evaluating a patient. Watch Gone Girl too where the main character shows how she abused herself to look like abuse.
@@MJ623NY They had been reported on multiple occasions. The children told people that they had seen him beat their mother. Then there is the video evidence of him sexually assaulting her and uploading it to some porn site.
@@MJ623NY The problem here wasn’t just with healthcare workers, there were many healthcare workers who made reports. The problem was nobody doing anything about it. Also, with the children not being physically harmed, it becomes a more difficult situation. If an adult victim doesn’t accept help, we cannot force it on them. And they often refuse help because we can’t offer them protection. Women, sometimes men but it is generally women, who are being abused get judged for not leaving all the time, but we offer them no kind of protection and so they end up having to choose whether they think that they’re abuser is likely to kill them.
The system failed her... It's insensitive and unreasonable to ask why she didn't leave. If he mistreated her this poorly when she was obeying him, then what would he have done had she stood up for herself??
My family were victims of domestic violence from my moms ex for years. We never murdered anyone. It is scary to leave. He threatened to kill us on the reg but we made a plan. He drunk himself to sleep, and we quietly gathered the kids and our important documents, got in the car and left the state. Now with a clear head we're able to protect ourselves and the children without hurting anyone else.
@@vanessalutz9740 so in others words people who commit murder and people who are claimed to be abused can be unimpressive or even bad people? shocking.
As a Latina PhD student in her second year in Scotland, Dr. Grande gives me hope that a doctorate is actually worth it. My field is trauma and testimonial theatre, so this channel is quite inspiring. You’re amazing, doc! 🙂
I suggest you watch the 48 hours episode on the case ..Amber Heard vibes all over... She was cheating on him, was apparently willing participant in submissive sexu@l videos w/ her husband ,made several accusations of abuse from other ppl in her life ! Just like DeppxHeard case, mainstream media trying to push the narrative " believe all women" 🙄🙄 Poor research here
I strongly suspect that chris was furious after that visit from CPS. He may have scared her so badly that she felt she had no choice but to kill him first.
@@doit9854 isn't it more likely that he feared that CPS were going to deprive him of his most valuable asset for controlling her, and decided upon annihilating them?
"women killed their spouse, an intimate acquaintance, or a family member in 60% of cases. When men killed with a gun, they most commonly shot a stranger or a non-family acquaintance.' -Men, women, and murder: gender-specific differences in rates of fatal violence and victimization A L Kellermann 1, J A Mercy - your thesis is false.
You're absolutely right about that. My ex stalked me off and on for years. When I left him he searched the City until he found out where I had moved. Then breaking into my apartment and leaving post it notes in my bed, moving things around but nothing that I could prove or press charges on. This went on for years.!!
I've watched quite a few true crime stories where a domestic partner is killed. I've watched VERY FEW where the partner has LEFT, and is subsequently killed. Would love to see some official stats on the two
Dr. Grande, the voice of reason, always! And the "take away" point he made from this case is so true and valuable! Never let anyone cross your boundaries, not in the beginning, not ever. Those boundary-crossing actions will only happen more frequently and more seriously with time. Also, don't ever get ANYONE become everything to you (ie, your only friend, or family. and your only source of income.) always remain independent for you.
I really feel for those children. They really lost both parents that day, and before that, had regularly witnessed their mom being abused by their dad. That might’ve been harder for the mom to bear than the abuse itself. This case has a lot of complexities about it.
People think one can only be a victim or a perpetrator of domestic violence, but there is also a big probability of being both things at the same time. Good video, Dr. Grande.
I was in an emotionally abusive relationship with a narcissist for 20 years. He had control of the finances and resources to hire good lawyers and I have chronic illness. I stayed with him as long as I did only because I didn't want him to be able to force visitation with my children or possibly even take full custody (which he would have done just to spite me, not out of love for our children). Once both of my children were of age to choose whether to see him, I left with them. He was not physically abusive, but he did starve us out so that I finally gave up and signed mediation papers that left us with nothing but debt. I consider the police and the courts complicit in this since there were never any consequences of any kind for him refusing to honor legal agreements. Leaving someone like this "the legal way" is not just hard, but devastating. My kids never got anything from him - no college, no car, no financial support or health care and he set them up to start their adult lives behind, but I followed the law. If not for food stamps, we would have starved and we are still locked in poverty. When faced with the facts of this case, it baffles me how they jump to the conclusion that she abused herself rather than the all-too-common scenario that she was abused by her partner. If she had left him, statistics tell us that she would most likely have been killed. Either way, those children were set up to lose the most. I feel like women who kill abusive partners are treated much more harshly than men who kill women. I don't understand it, but the very reason she is believed to have murdered him is because if he was awake and struggled for the gun, she would have been unlikely to prevail. WTF? Does that not support the idea that she couldn't have just left? Basically, the message is that she was supposed to take her children and run with no help from authorities or roll the dice and fight back when he next attacks her.
I agree. Women are held to a much higher standard in a lot of incidences when it comes to legal charges. Women (or men) that have been married to or in relationships with a psychopathic narcissist and been lucky enough to come out alive and mostly intact know that “just leaving” isn’t really an option. When you leave there are very specific things you have to do and people don’t just magically know how or what to do. I do believe that this woman could’ve felt killing her husband was the only way out. Even if he was sleeping, which I’m not sure about, it doesn’t mean she didn’t truly believe that was her only good opportunity to not be overpowered and killed herself. Having survived a relationship similar to this, and I’m legitimate my ex husband was sentenced to prison for what he did to me when he thought I was going to leave, I can say that it’s just as likely he handed her the gun to terrorize her. Abusers with a weapon fascination will pull weapons on you and then hand them to you and say stuff like “kill me”. I believe he did make her put bullets in the gun. They terrorize you. I believe that she truly thought if she went to sleep with him that night, she wouldn’t wake up.
Hi Dr. Grande, just wanted to drop a comment on how your earlier videos on SPSS have gotten me through my thesis. My initial thesis unfortunately was graded as insufficient and I had one more chance to repair it. With your help I was able to hand in a much better repair version and as a result, I graduated from university and received my BSc. in International Business! I really became a fan of yours when I started watching some of your other videos on more interesting topics (SPSS wouldn't be my normal topic of interest, no disrespect haha!). I love your genuine, nuanced, highly professional and analytical approach and your sense of humor throughout all your content. Outside of the intellectual sense I would assume we are very different sorts of people (24 y.o. Dutch creative aesthetics-minded art person over here), so it has been refreshing to get out of my usual bubble and enjoy your knowledge and opinion sharing! You're truly an inspiration I never saw coming, given how I got to know your channel. The way you approach your topics of discussion is a way I wish everyone would, especially during these times where people have access to so much (unfounded) information and will just about believe everything they read on the internet, and form opinions just like that without much thorough prior research. Thank you for all that you contribute to the world, genuinely.
Love how so many always say 'why didn't they just leave?' It's not always as easy just 'leaving' when you're being physically and mentally abused, controlled and every move monitored.
NO ONE IS SAYING IT'S EASY. LIFE IS HARD. THESE SITUATIONS ARE *VERY* HARD. MURDER IS EVIL AND IT'S NO EXCUSE. The law defends murder in self-defense ONLY when reasonable not excessive force was used if they felt their own life was threatened IN the moment. He was found laying face down, she texted about figuring out a way to murder him, it was obviously premeditated. She SHOULD have left. There is no option as a society to give people a carte blanche to kill their abusers just because they're abusive in general.
There aren't always ways to leave when someone's controlling you, biting, burning and grabbing you - in front of your kids no less. If she did kill him to breathe fresh air and obtain her right to liberty and the pursuit of happiness, then I'm glad she did it. Men victimize women physically all the time. At some point it has to stop. If the law won't do it, (i.e. O.J. Simpson et.al), then maybe it's the right thing imo. Thank you Dr Grande. 👍🌹
So if a man did this to a women you would justify it? Because men are physically abused my their partners all the time. The most underreported. She planned this out. She killed a defenseless man who wasn’t a threat at the time. Killed him while he slept. How is that justified in your eyes?
@@unknownlifeform8458 ummm. Yes she did kill him in his sleep. There were no indications that he was attacking her at that moment. And also the fact that he was laying in bed with his hands under his head
I think this is the best video yet. I had not heard of the case but was able to follow the narrative and information whilst still being able to understand and explore the critical analysis. Perfectly concise Dr. Grande.
I think she was in a "kill or be killed type of situation." We all know how domestic violence can potentially end and how difficult it is to escape it despite resources. Sometimes to hr resources are inadequate or fail. At times, the victim's escape comes in the form of death. The victim's death. I know two women who have left abusive, narcissistic partners. Despite moving to get further away, one of my friends has to move to get away. He has found her and is harassing them once more. She will most likely have to move again. She does have a restraining order. The other still endures harrassment. Her car brakes were tampered with. He has harrassed her employers and her lawyer. She has lost jobs because if him. He breeches the restraining order without consequences. He has not paid childcare or any court ordered costs. That tells you how broken this system that is supposed to help them, truly is.
Right. I hate when people ask the victim why she didn't just leave. Victims of DM are ALWAYS looking over their shoulder bc their perpetrators prey on their fear. If he bear her when she obeyed him, what would he have done when she stuck up for herself and left?
The problem is when you do it this way you create a situation where anyone looking from the outside in has no idea which version of reality is the true one. Either your BF was an abusive SOB or you are an abusive SOB using feminism as a cloak for your actions. Either narrative can be true. Shooting someone point blank on a couch is always going to look bad. If you have a chance to leave you take it. If the fucker shows up you fucking light his ass up before he even gets to your door. Two in the chest, one in the head and one more in the head just in case. If you do it that way then no one in the right mind (outside of maybe NY and CA) would even think of charging you and everyone would know what happened.
@@cominroitover80 That is a short sighted approach. You are always going to face charges if you do that and while you may be or are supposed to be presumed not guilty until proven guilty that is nor reality. You will be assumed guilty until you can prove self defence. Doing that is a big lottery. The only realistic alternative is to create a paper trail through the courts, get court orders, have good advocates and a support network and don't do anything to compromise your own freedom. You have to find energy and money and get lawyers to do the fighting for you. While it may seem fun, you cant go around shooting people Willy Nilly. This is not Pulp Fiction. It is reality. You want to avoid jail and let him find it.
That's terrible!! I divorced my second husband.. honestly I was relieved to know that he married quickly. I knew it meant he had someone else to focus on. But I was also fearful for her... because I knew what she was facing.. ugh- I was married to him for almost 9 years. He married her 4 months after the divorce papers were signed. (She was not the girl he was engaged to before we were divorced😬) that marriage did not last 5 months.☹️ I feel sad for her because she was never married before.
Interesting and illuminating. I do believe she was abused and not establishing an alibi. Otherwise she would have told the officials at the hospital she was abused. The theory she created the abuse is ludicrous. Thanks doc g.
Its so refreshing to hear a case analysis that gives both sides and speaks about personal responsibility. Boundary crossing is like that old adage give someone an inch and they take a mile we all must be careful who we choose to give power over our lives. From significant others to politicians we need to do our homework. I appreciate Dr Grande for his channel that promotes personal responsibility combined with great compassion.
Thank you Dr. Grande for your evidence and motive analysis. This case makes me wonder if it was merely a matter of time and the flip of a coin, as to who would end up dead. I sincerely hope someone saw this as the cautionary tale that it is.
I agree with most of your conclusions but I just think 19 years is way too long of a sentence. I think she had a history of severe abuse, not only by her husband, and that she lost control. I think it’s a significant mitigating factor and should’ve been considered during sentencing. I do believe she is culpable but I wish she had taken that plea deal! Another great vid Doctor!
Another great video Doc! Can you do an examination of the personality and mental health on Christine Chubbuck? She was the news anchor that killed herself on live television in the mid 1970's. One of your viewers requested this awhile back and I would love to know your input on this. Thank you.
Sad story and I hope the children are going to be ok and have someone to talk to and grow up happy. Domestic violence can make people afraid to leave, and some times this is the only answer they can think of. Not a good one answer for sure. Good talk.
To say someone is purposely causing themselves harm to have some master murder plot is incredibly damaging to abuse survivors. This is heartbreaking. I can’t imagine being constantly abused and to come out the other end as a villain
I don't believe that to be the case. The reality is that woman who murder their partners often say they where abused even when its not true. That doesn't take away from real victims. That's why its important to investigate and gather as much evidence. You cant assume someone is lying or telling the truth either way. This case is very hard because it seems like there was abuse and she did murder him. She really should have left when CPS arrived.
From my own personal experience another reason she may have been afraid of leaving is the idea of him possibly getting partial or even full custody of the children. The potential of him having visits with them without anyone being there to protect them. People do not understand that once you leave the threat doesn't always end especially if you have children involved.
@@elainehiggins713 Just the opposite, all of her admissions about his parenting were basically glowing, according to he he was great father and she wanted he kids to grow up in a home with two parents.
Hi Doctor Grande. Thanks for another top-notch upload.★ I've never heard of this case before. Best we use emojis thoughtfully! I'm pretty sure we all over Chris Watts by now but how about Cindy Watts (his Mum)? Now there's a whole deluded family, Mum, Dad and Sis. (I couldn't see that you had covered her) Anyhow, just throwing that in the ring...
Sound analysis and I've said on another of your videos that I believe that jury's should be made up of people like yourself the trained professionals who are excellent critical thinkers and would debate the verdict, in my opinion much better than the average person, now I'm not saying that the average person is stupid but I think some would go with the flo when debating in general. As always keep up the good work Sir 👍.
There should be an update for this, she was resentenced in late 2021, and now has 7.5 years for the new Domestic Violence Survivors Act after appealing to the higher courts.
@@leiylahcamp8442 No, it means that people who talk to police without a lawyer present all too frequently talk themselves into worse difficulties. Guilty people know what the cops are after, and can at least try to dodge it; innocent people don't. This is why I call B/S on anyone who thinks lawyering up is or looks like a sign of guilt. Innocent people want to do things the legal way. It's *guilty* people who fly the Hail Mary Pass of trying to talk their way out. They know what happens when the attorney shows up: law and facts start actually mattering, and then it's all over but the pleading.
You know, I left my husband 100 times before I finally got away. The dynamics of abusive relationships have a really big range. As for me, I wanted to kill him on several occasions. I most certainly knew I would get caught tho and didn’t want to go to jail, but going back time after time because of some reason or another was devastating in its own right. It is the lesser of two evils. P.S. I was very young and do not have the desire to Murder anyone. I did get counseling y’all.
Nikki is given way too much credit for playing the part of the villain. Fact: a woman will do whatever is necessary to protect her children. This story could easily have ended in Chis murdering his wife and children.
Thank you, dr g. This case is infuriating, this woman was BRUTALIZED and it is well known that attempts to leave your abuser is frequently the tipping point that results in your death. Why couldn’t she just leave? Well he woke up, grabbed a gun, aimed it at her and was preparing to shoot, so, umm....?
Last time I beg you to analyze someone but can u analyze JESSE PINKMAN? He’s such an interesting character and I can’t stop rewatching Breaking Bad again. Your channel is more addictive than the whole blue Meth! 😅
Would love your thoughts on the Yorkshire Ripper and the new Neflix series about him. It was truly awful that he got away with it for so long because the victims were labelled as prostitutes from the very beginning and as such the public support for an investigation was non existent - that's until a young "respectable" girl was killed. Fascinating case.
Oooh, so now Dr. G is a mind reader I see, lol.. I literally just watched about this on CourtTv 2 days ago and here we are.. Still would like to see you do the school shooter TJ Lane.. I cannot find much information on him, what it all was that happened, why he did it etc so I can try and analyze it for school and so hoping you could find more in your capacity and intellect.. You're a huge roll model for PhD students like myself. I talk about you a lot in class..
Doctor Grande you are amazing! Could you please do a diagnosis on the fictional character Basil Fawlty from the British comedy Fawlty Tower's? Thank you so much for your fantastic content.♥️ and happy holidays ☃️
I actually struggled with the counting, touching items behaviors as a pre-adolescent, and then other behaviors symptomatic of a stressful childhood. But, I am curious, was that a simple statement of fact, that 10 people agreed with? Do they know you, or are they fellow sufferers? I'm teasing. If it was a statement of fact, obviously, I sympathize. Mostly, I just love this channel and wondered if one of his signature jokes went over my head:)
She sent a text saying she hasn't figured out how to kill him yet six weeks earlier. The gun was touching his head when it was fired. He was either asleep or unconscious. He might very well have been an abuser, a horrible abuser. Sorry but that doesn't allow you to shoot a person in the head, especially if they are asleep or unconscious. The jury believed that she was a victim of abuse. They also believed that she was a master manipulator. They heard all the evidence, from both sides, yet found her guilty. The master manipulator part is what makes me pause. Even the Doctor in this video says it's possible that she made up some or all of of this that still doesn't excuse murder. Umm doc you say she's not guilty beyond a reasonable doubt but then say you believe she murdered him. The fact that she probably used his phone to make searches makes me see why the jury saw her as a master manipulator.
Appreciate you breaking this down more! When I heard about it I was LIVID! But diving more into the details I must agree that she intentionally killed him, it was no self-defense. And that's incredibly unfortunate because one cannot understand being a victim of abuse unless they themselves have gone through it. I imagine she was fed up and murder was the easiest out. The safest way to ensure he wouldn't come for her and his children. And it's just really sad to be honest :(
It's mindblowing the number of people who believe it's easy to leave their abuser. The vast majority of people engage in that victim blaming mentality. That's why victims like Nikki Addimando, who endure years of torture and abuse, end up imprisoned.
@@jtrocks39 Is this how you interpret Sarah's reply? Are you intentionally misinterpreting it or proving Tessa's and Sarah's point by way of irony? Genuinely confused.
Oh and I have a few requests for future subjects! - Roger Stone - Dave Chappelle - Brooke Shields -“Memento” - Shia LaBeof - Mitch McConnell (there’s a great podcast about him from “Embedded”) - Billie Holiday - James Baldwin - The events at Chernobyl - Mahatma Gandhi - Joan of Arc - Chairman Mao - Joseph Stalin - Salvador Dali - John Lennon - Harriet Tubman - Nina Simone - Grey Gardens! Ok um... that’s probably enough 😂
Isn’t that literally Roxie’s defence in the movie/musical Chicago? The boyfriend reaches for the gun but she gets it first and shoots him. Of course the reality was he dumped her and she shot him in a rage.
To be honest, I still struggle with that subject too. In some cases, I do see why a woman was so damaged that she couldn't make that decision, but in others, absolutely not. They had decent paying jobs to earn their own money, they were educated, they had friends and family that begged them to leave and offered their help. They also had law enforcement that knew the truth but couldn't do anything until the woman was honest. Most importantly, if you have children, even if you don't care enough about yourself, as a mother you would want to protect your children and get them out of that environment. I do have sympathy for women (or men) that are abused like this, but I also have my doubts.
@@LariaX I understand what you are saying . Usually the abuse doesn't start until the victim is firmly committed to the relationship . At first At least there are loving times and intense feelings . The abuse usually starts as one off attacks. Sometimes she goes to friends and family who feel betrayed when she returns to him . This isolates her which is perfect for him. The leaving is a process it takes time and usually the victim is not clear headed. She will doubt her own mind due to the gaslighting ,fear lack of sleep etc. Most of us do not abandon a relationship, romantic or not without trying to fix things . We believe things will get better if ( name anything here, a new job , counseling, more money , New place to live .etc ) The victim has to get through to the point where she/he can and will step over the love and leave . Sadly by this point she probably feels she will die. It is likely by now no one believes in her . That's why refuges or shelters are so important . They will pick up the pieces when everyone else has given up on her. ( I don't blame them for this at all ) supporting victims is hard work and the victim will probably leave many times before a permanent shift . The victim is also exhausted and stressed , it's hard to make such a big move when you are already depleted . Thus it usually requires a crisis to provide the momentum to get away .
@@Slickmickyoyo97 wow that’s an incredibly ignorant and untrue statement. And at the time of my need for CPS for my daughter I was the primary provider for years and had been sober for years. F off
TY. Please analyze the Ross Harris murder case. He was convicted of murder, he said he forgot his child was in the car left in the hot parking lot. Was he guilty of murder or not.
I agree with you. I certainly think she should've left and in my opinion, murdering Chris was absolutely unacceptable. I highly doubt she would've ended up in possession of his firearm in a struggle, that's just a ridiculous story. Yes I feel for victims of DV as I have BEEN a victim, and although I feel strongly, I don't condone shooting and killing someone. Due process. Take them to court. Call the police. Leave. There's tons of options and I just don't believe her story. This is happening A LOT and I think these women believe that if they tell their story of violence and assault that it's going to be accepted and praised and they'll get off easy. I'm not a fan of this trend.
Hey Dr. Grande, I really enjoy your videos and insight. I would like to see your opinion on Wendy Williams. Particularly addressing the bizarre behavior on one of her shows recently and also how she addressed it on the following show. She was accused of being under the influence. Thanks! (Watch her show on RUclips from 10/23/2020)
I think 2 things can be true someone can be a victim of dv and also murder someone. I don't think she did it in self defense but I do think she may have been pushed to it. So getting 7 years she got off easier than most would.
@Dr. Todd Grande I'm not a "Professional" but...I truly believe that her defense mechanism was on auto pilot in an ongoing a flight or fight response. Doesn't make it right. But, it should be a warning to love & protect the children you bring into this world. Period.
I had NOT heard of this case, but was surprised to hear that an Emoji Expression 🙄 was analyzed as part of the evidence.
Ive noticed in a couppe of recent cases that emojis as well as text speak are being brought up. Changing with the technology!
So was I. But if you really want to see splitting hairs, look at my mathematical career.
When did this case take place? Lord have mercy, such senseless violence. 😟
Dr grande when you would talk about the case of mark bridger he is the murderer of april jones it is case in machynlleth wales
I’d be curious to see the emoji in question. When he said grimace, I pictured 😬, which actually pops up as a suggestion when you type that word. A wry smile seems like it would be the smirk 😏 emoji perhaps. Certainly hard to confuse an obvious grimace for a smile either way.
Yo he used only 16min and explained everything consistently and clearly. Literally by 5 to 7min you can already get the whole case. What an amazingly scripted channel. Great analysis as well!
Dr Grande is a genius!
“Why didn’t she just leave?” is the typical question of someone who has no idea about how domestic violence works.
When an abuser hits a woman, he has already destroyed her emotionally before, so she doesn’t rebel.
If leaving somebody was easy, there would be few marriages left. People stay because divorces are costly, hard, difficult on children.
Not all women respond that way. I know women who left their abusers.
It's just stupid democrats trying to shame violence and rape victims
@@zhbvenkhoReload huh what does this have to do with politics???? Be smart.
@@katherinerosemore274 that's true, but it doesn't mean all women will or can leave. There's so many factors at play, starting with something as simple as person's personality. Survivors of domestic abuse carry out risk assessments all the time- and research is clear on the fact that the abuse increases significantly when the person wants to leave/leaves.
She was also seen by a SANE nurse months before she killed him. That nurse said that in her entire career at a SANE, 15+ years, she had never seen such severe injuries to a victims vulva as she had seen on Nicky. That’s crazy. I don’t understand why the prosecutor couldn’t see that. Additionally, he had been threatening to shoot her in her sleep and in such a way that she would be aware of her surroundings but unable to move and that she would be dependent on him for care. A number of those searches were related to this very thing.
I will never be convinced that she had any other option. If she had left, I believe he would have come looking fo her and probably killed her or worse.
As a nurse myself, that is exactly what is suspicious. Never have seen injuries like that? This woman was getting injured that severely on the regular and could still walk around normally? It is very much a red flag to keep in mind when evaluating a patient. Watch Gone Girl too where the main character shows how she abused herself to look like abuse.
And why didn't the nurse report such severe injuries especially given there were children in the household?
@@MJ623NY They had been reported on multiple occasions. The children told people that they had seen him beat their mother. Then there is the video evidence of him sexually assaulting her and uploading it to some porn site.
@@MJ623NY The problem here wasn’t just with healthcare workers, there were many healthcare workers who made reports. The problem was nobody doing anything about it. Also, with the children not being physically harmed, it becomes a more difficult situation. If an adult victim doesn’t accept help, we cannot force it on them. And they often refuse help because we can’t offer them protection. Women, sometimes men but it is generally women, who are being abused get judged for not leaving all the time, but we offer them no kind of protection and so they end up having to choose whether they think that they’re abuser is likely to kill them.
I agree. Why did she kill him? Because he was regularly abusing her, threatening her and she wanted to live and protect her kids! Free nikki!
“There is no sense in having boundaries if there are no consequences to violating them” 👏👏👏Very well said and a very good lesson indeed.
The system failed her... It's insensitive and unreasonable to ask why she didn't leave. If he mistreated her this poorly when she was obeying him, then what would he have done had she stood up for herself??
@@willhelmberkly3025 lol
My family were victims of domestic violence from my moms ex for years. We never murdered anyone. It is scary to leave. He threatened to kill us on the reg but we made a plan. He drunk himself to sleep, and we quietly gathered the kids and our important documents, got in the car and left the state. Now with a clear head we're able to protect ourselves and the children without hurting anyone else.
Yes the system failed her, they expect perfect angels as victims, if they aren’t perfect they are painted as master manipulators
@@vanessalutz9740 so in others words people who commit murder and people who are claimed to be abused can be unimpressive or even bad people? shocking.
That prosecutor is a fool. What would Nicole have to gain by killing him?
As a Latina PhD student in her second year in Scotland, Dr. Grande gives me hope that a doctorate is actually worth it. My field is trauma and testimonial theatre, so this channel is quite inspiring. You’re amazing, doc! 🙂
L C
Where are you getting your degree from?
Congrats!
That sounds fascinating!
What a coincidence I am also a student in the U.K, I am studying Counselling Psychology so Dr. Grande's videos are the best!
Latinx lol
Good luck to you!
Dr. G is always fair minded and impartial in these cases. Facts are facts and I appreciate his honest opinion on subjects like this. Bravo 👏🏻
I suggest you watch the 48 hours episode on the case ..Amber Heard vibes all over... She was cheating on him, was apparently willing participant in submissive sexu@l videos w/ her husband ,made several accusations of abuse from other ppl in her life ! Just like DeppxHeard case, mainstream media trying to push the narrative " believe all women" 🙄🙄 Poor research here
I strongly suspect that chris was furious after that visit from CPS. He may have scared her so badly that she felt she had no choice but to kill him first.
Your suspect.
@@doit9854 isn't it more likely that he feared that CPS were going to deprive him of his most valuable asset for controlling her, and decided upon annihilating them?
@@tomsdottir No. It sounds like your trying very hard to make excuses for murder.
@Rub 2004 you mean a victim/murderer?
@@doit9854 I'm not sure she's suspect when the point of this video is to discuss what may have happened in a situation like this...
Leaving is not the end of the abuse...it just changes and so many women end up dead after they have left
"women killed their spouse, an intimate acquaintance, or a family member in 60% of cases. When men killed with a gun, they most commonly shot a stranger or a non-family acquaintance.' -Men, women, and murder: gender-specific differences in rates of fatal violence and victimization
A L Kellermann 1, J A Mercy
- your thesis is false.
@@truthsocialmedia where did you get those statistics ?
@@truthsocialmedia you left out how many women are strangled or beaten to death .
You're absolutely right about that. My ex stalked me off and on for years. When I left him he searched the City until he found out where I had moved. Then breaking into my apartment and leaving post it notes in my bed, moving things around but nothing that I could prove or press charges on. This went on for years.!!
I've watched quite a few true crime stories where a domestic partner is killed. I've watched VERY FEW where the partner has LEFT, and is subsequently killed. Would love to see some official stats on the two
Dr. Grande, the voice of reason, always! And the "take away" point he made from this case is so true and valuable! Never let anyone cross your boundaries, not in the beginning, not ever. Those boundary-crossing actions will only happen more frequently and more seriously with time. Also, don't ever get ANYONE become everything to you (ie, your only friend, or family. and your only source of income.) always remain independent for you.
I really feel for those children. They really lost both parents that day, and before that, had regularly witnessed their mom being abused by their dad. That might’ve been harder for the mom to bear than the abuse itself. This case has a lot of complexities about it.
I soooooo needed a Dr. Grande video after my day!!!! :)
Me too! Can't even explain it, it was just a shit day. Be well!
Wtf is wrong with you?! This is a case about domestic violence and murder. You need help.
You enjoy hearing about domestic violence?
People think one can only be a victim or a perpetrator of domestic violence, but there is also a big probability of being both things at the same time.
Good video, Dr. Grande.
Finally I understand how vital emojis are. Will use them more often. 🐰
Oh yea, me too! ❤️❤️😜😉😝
@@Swnsasy 😊
Very pretty woman btw.. I'm jelly of your cheeks.. Lol.. They are so bright and I want them!! Oh wait, my whole brown skin.. Darn it 😡😁😘
@@Swnsasy 🧡
Haha - I'm sitting far back from my screen and that looks like a pair of pliers from here!
I was in an emotionally abusive relationship with a narcissist for 20 years. He had control of the finances and resources to hire good lawyers and I have chronic illness. I stayed with him as long as I did only because I didn't want him to be able to force visitation with my children or possibly even take full custody (which he would have done just to spite me, not out of love for our children). Once both of my children were of age to choose whether to see him, I left with them. He was not physically abusive, but he did starve us out so that I finally gave up and signed mediation papers that left us with nothing but debt. I consider the police and the courts complicit in this since there were never any consequences of any kind for him refusing to honor legal agreements. Leaving someone like this "the legal way" is not just hard, but devastating. My kids never got anything from him - no college, no car, no financial support or health care and he set them up to start their adult lives behind, but I followed the law. If not for food stamps, we would have starved and we are still locked in poverty.
When faced with the facts of this case, it baffles me how they jump to the conclusion that she abused herself rather than the all-too-common scenario that she was abused by her partner. If she had left him, statistics tell us that she would most likely have been killed. Either way, those children were set up to lose the most. I feel like women who kill abusive partners are treated much more harshly than men who kill women. I don't understand it, but the very reason she is believed to have murdered him is because if he was awake and struggled for the gun, she would have been unlikely to prevail. WTF? Does that not support the idea that she couldn't have just left? Basically, the message is that she was supposed to take her children and run with no help from authorities or roll the dice and fight back when he next attacks her.
ok
Exactly
TL;DR
You are right. Statistics show that women who kill an abusive spouse are given harsher sentences than abusive men who kill their spouse. Bizarre.
I agree. Women are held to a much higher standard in a lot of incidences when it comes to legal charges. Women (or men) that have been married to or in relationships with a psychopathic narcissist and been lucky enough to come out alive and mostly intact know that “just leaving” isn’t really an option. When you leave there are very specific things you have to do and people don’t just magically know how or what to do. I do believe that this woman could’ve felt killing her husband was the only way out. Even if he was sleeping, which I’m not sure about, it doesn’t mean she didn’t truly believe that was her only good opportunity to not be overpowered and killed herself. Having survived a relationship similar to this, and I’m legitimate my ex husband was sentenced to prison for what he did to me when he thought I was going to leave, I can say that it’s just as likely he handed her the gun to terrorize her. Abusers with a weapon fascination will pull weapons on you and then hand them to you and say stuff like “kill me”. I believe he did make her put bullets in the gun. They terrorize you. I believe that she truly thought if she went to sleep with him that night, she wouldn’t wake up.
Hi Dr. Grande, just wanted to drop a comment on how your earlier videos on SPSS have gotten me through my thesis. My initial thesis unfortunately was graded as insufficient and I had one more chance to repair it. With your help I was able to hand in a much better repair version and as a result, I graduated from university and received my BSc. in International Business! I really became a fan of yours when I started watching some of your other videos on more interesting topics (SPSS wouldn't be my normal topic of interest, no disrespect haha!). I love your genuine, nuanced, highly professional and analytical approach and your sense of humor throughout all your content. Outside of the intellectual sense I would assume we are very different sorts of people (24 y.o. Dutch creative aesthetics-minded art person over here), so it has been refreshing to get out of my usual bubble and enjoy your knowledge and opinion sharing! You're truly an inspiration I never saw coming, given how I got to know your channel. The way you approach your topics of discussion is a way I wish everyone would, especially during these times where people have access to so much (unfounded) information and will just about believe everything they read on the internet, and form opinions just like that without much thorough prior research. Thank you for all that you contribute to the world, genuinely.
Your degree is worth shit all if that is the case then
You know humanity has come a long way when the correct use of an emoji is being analyzed in a MURDER trial 😅🤣...
I'd love to see the attorney bill: "Emoji Analysis: $750"
@@doit9854 😝
Love how so many always say 'why didn't they just leave?' It's not always as easy just 'leaving' when you're being physically and mentally abused, controlled and every move monitored.
NO ONE IS SAYING IT'S EASY. LIFE IS HARD. THESE SITUATIONS ARE *VERY* HARD. MURDER IS EVIL AND IT'S NO EXCUSE. The law defends murder in self-defense ONLY when reasonable not excessive force was used if they felt their own life was threatened IN the moment. He was found laying face down, she texted about figuring out a way to murder him, it was obviously premeditated. She SHOULD have left. There is no option as a society to give people a carte blanche to kill their abusers just because they're abusive in general.
There aren't always ways to leave when someone's controlling you, biting, burning and grabbing you - in front of your kids no less. If she did kill him to breathe fresh air and obtain her right to liberty and the pursuit of happiness, then I'm glad she did it.
Men victimize women physically all the time. At some point it has to stop. If the law won't do it, (i.e. O.J. Simpson et.al), then maybe it's the right thing imo.
Thank you Dr Grande. 👍🌹
So if a man did this to a women you would justify it? Because men are physically abused my their partners all the time. The most underreported. She planned this out. She killed a defenseless man who wasn’t a threat at the time. Killed him while he slept. How is that justified in your eyes?
@@jtrocks39 he didn't die while sleeping.... Rewatch watch the video. How do you think she bit her own shoulder? I can't bite my shoulder. Can you?
@@unknownlifeform8458 ummm. Yes she did kill him in his sleep. There were no indications that he was attacking her at that moment. And also the fact that he was laying in bed with his hands under his head
@@unknownlifeform8458 There is no proof he was the one who bite her.
@@unknownlifeform8458 yes I can bite my shoulder
Thank you for the ending - it’s important to set boundaries and notice when someone consistently oversteps them even if it’s tiny ones
I think this is the best video yet. I had not heard of the case but was able to follow the narrative and information whilst still being able to understand and explore the critical analysis. Perfectly concise Dr. Grande.
I think she was in a "kill or be killed type of situation."
We all know how domestic violence can potentially end and how difficult it is to escape it despite resources. Sometimes to hr resources are inadequate or fail. At times, the victim's escape comes in the form of death. The victim's death.
I know two women who have left abusive, narcissistic partners.
Despite moving to get further away, one of my friends has to move to get away. He has found her and is harassing them once more. She will most likely have to move again. She does have a restraining order.
The other still endures harrassment. Her car brakes were tampered with. He has harrassed her employers and her lawyer. She has lost jobs because if him. He breeches the restraining order without consequences. He has not paid childcare or any court ordered costs.
That tells you how broken this system that is supposed to help them, truly is.
Right. I hate when people ask the victim why she didn't just leave. Victims of DM are ALWAYS looking over their shoulder bc their perpetrators prey on their fear. If he bear her when she obeyed him, what would he have done when she stuck up for herself and left?
The problem is when you do it this way you create a situation where anyone looking from the outside in has no idea which version of reality is the true one. Either your BF was an abusive SOB or you are an abusive SOB using feminism as a cloak for your actions. Either narrative can be true. Shooting someone point blank on a couch is always going to look bad. If you have a chance to leave you take it. If the fucker shows up you fucking light his ass up before he even gets to your door. Two in the chest, one in the head and one more in the head just in case. If you do it that way then no one in the right mind (outside of maybe NY and CA) would even think of charging you and everyone would know what happened.
@@cominroitover80 That is a short sighted approach. You are always going to face charges if you do that and while you may be or are supposed to be presumed not guilty until proven guilty that is nor reality. You will be assumed guilty until you can prove self defence. Doing that is a big lottery. The only realistic alternative is to create a paper trail through the courts, get court orders, have good advocates and a support network and don't do anything to compromise your own freedom. You have to find energy and money and get lawyers to do the fighting for you. While it may seem fun, you cant go around shooting people Willy Nilly. This is not Pulp Fiction. It is reality. You want to avoid jail and let him find it.
@@mrparlanejxtra Thank you for being a voice of reason. Well said. 👍
That's terrible!!
I divorced my second husband.. honestly I was relieved to know that he married quickly. I knew it meant he had someone else to focus on. But I was also fearful for her... because I knew what she was facing.. ugh-
I was married to him for almost 9 years.
He married her 4 months after the divorce papers were signed.
(She was not the girl he was engaged to before we were divorced😬) that marriage did not last 5 months.☹️
I feel sad for her because she was never married before.
I gave up trying to decipher meaning in emojis long ago! Never had heard of this tragic case. Hope the kids are doing well! Great video dr!
Interesting and illuminating. I do believe she was abused and not establishing an alibi. Otherwise she would have told the officials at the hospital she was abused. The theory she created the abuse is ludicrous. Thanks doc g.
Thank you so much Dr Grande!!! I requested this case in on Twitter. It’s heart wrenching.
Could you look at the psychology involved in the crimes of former MMA fighter War Machine (Jonathan Paul Koppenhaver)?
That would be a good one!
Good recommendation
Was just thinking about that one the other day
Yooo we need Todd's analysis on this fr
@Robin Yabanks edgy
I enjoy the manner in which you analyze your cases. You explanation of what you will be discussing is very much appreciated
Perhaps she felt she had no where to go if she ran? I don't know. Awful situation and no one should ever have to face it. Great video, Doc! 🙌
Its so refreshing to hear a case analysis that gives both sides and speaks about personal responsibility. Boundary crossing is like that old adage give someone an inch and they take a mile we all must be careful who we choose to give power over our lives. From significant others to politicians we need to do our homework. I appreciate Dr Grande for his channel that promotes personal responsibility combined with great compassion.
Seems like she committed murder due to "battered wife syndrome". I'm surprised they didn't use that as a defense and that you didn't mention it.
Thank you Dr. Grande for your evidence and motive analysis. This case makes me wonder if it was merely a matter of time and the flip of a coin, as to who would end up dead. I sincerely hope someone saw this as the cautionary tale that it is.
Violent in a sexual way. Now that's who I want coaching my daughter's in gymnastic
I know!! I heard that and cringed 🤢
I agree with most of your conclusions but I just think 19 years is way too long of a sentence. I think she had a history of severe abuse, not only by her husband, and that she lost control. I think it’s a significant mitigating factor and should’ve been considered during sentencing. I do believe she is culpable but I wish she had taken that plea deal! Another great vid Doctor!
Another great video Doc! Can you do an examination of the personality and mental health on Christine Chubbuck? She was the news anchor that killed herself on live television in the mid 1970's. One of your viewers requested this awhile back and I would love to know your input on this. Thank you.
Sad story and I hope the children are going to be ok and have someone to talk to and grow up happy. Domestic violence can make people afraid to leave, and some times this is the only answer they can think of. Not a good one answer for sure. Good talk.
To say someone is purposely causing themselves harm to have some master murder plot is incredibly damaging to abuse survivors. This is heartbreaking. I can’t imagine being constantly abused and to come out the other end as a villain
He didn’t say that listen again carefully, he was posing scenarios which he stated did not add up .
I don't believe that to be the case. The reality is that woman who murder their partners often say they where abused even when its not true. That doesn't take away from real victims. That's why its important to investigate and gather as much evidence. You cant assume someone is lying or telling the truth either way. This case is very hard because it seems like there was abuse and she did murder him. She really should have left when CPS arrived.
Well but it happens all the time!! The perpetrator usually plays the victim, and he/she does it very well.
I had not heard of this case. Thank you for this analyzes!
The fact that she didnt take the agreement tells me she could likely be innocent
From my own personal experience another reason she may have been afraid of leaving is the idea of him possibly getting partial or even full custody of the children. The potential of him having visits with them without anyone being there to protect them. People do not understand that once you leave the threat doesn't always end especially if you have children involved.
There was no evidence Chris harmed the children. Nikki never claimed that.
@@elainehiggins713 Just the opposite, all of her admissions about his parenting were basically glowing, according to he he was great father and she wanted he kids to grow up in a home with two parents.
Thank you Dr Grande😊I wasn’t familiar with this case. I feel bad for their children. Your analysis was beautifully done on a complicated case.
This reminded me of the Burning Bed case. That was a case with similar circumstances but she was acquitted.
Hi Doctor Grande. Thanks for another top-notch upload.★
I've never heard of this case before. Best we use emojis thoughtfully!
I'm pretty sure we all over Chris Watts by now but how
about Cindy Watts (his Mum)? Now there's a whole deluded
family, Mum, Dad and Sis. (I couldn't see that you had covered her)
Anyhow, just throwing that in the ring...
Sound analysis and I've said on another of your videos that I believe that jury's should be made up of people like yourself the trained professionals who are excellent critical thinkers and would debate the verdict, in my opinion much better than the average person, now I'm not saying that the average person is stupid but I think some would go with the flo when debating in general. As always keep up the good work Sir 👍.
Another jewel of a video with some valuable truths. As always, thank you for sharing your insight and wisdom with us!
Now THIS was a very thoughtful analysis 👏
Hi Dr. Grande! Just want to drop a video request for Rudy “The Miami Zombie” Eugene. Great stuff as always!
There should be an update for this, she was resentenced in late 2021, and now has 7.5 years for the new Domestic Violence Survivors Act after appealing to the higher courts.
"She talked to the police without a lawyer."
Just one of many fatal errors, right there, and the one that applies whether you're guilty or innocent.
so would it mean because she talked to the police without lawyers that she guilty?
@@leiylahcamp8442 No, it means that people who talk to police without a lawyer present all too frequently talk themselves into worse difficulties. Guilty people know what the cops are after, and can at least try to dodge it; innocent people don't.
This is why I call B/S on anyone who thinks lawyering up is or looks like a sign of guilt. Innocent people want to do things the legal way.
It's *guilty* people who fly the Hail Mary Pass of trying to talk their way out. They know what happens when the attorney shows up: law and facts start actually mattering, and then it's all over but the pleading.
Until you've lived in those circumstances you cannot know. And, the biting? He was a sadistic bastard all right.
i click a doctor grande video, i like it, THEN i watch it..... already know it’s gonna be quality content.....
Joan Crawford or Trisha Paytas and Ethan Klein frenemies analysis!
Can’t wait till 600k.
WHAT happens at 600K? A new RUclips certificate or a kick arse new video?? 🤔
Yea Joan Crawford would be very interesting! 👍
He has done Tricia Paytas - google his name followed by hers.
@@elphaba4674 ~ Yes! I'm a big fan of Joanie but her private life? Mommie Dearest indeed!
@@sherunswithscissors yes, but OP asked about the Frenemies drama, as in more things have happened with her and Ethan from H3H3
You know, I left my husband 100 times before I finally got away. The dynamics of abusive relationships have a really big range. As for me, I wanted to kill him on several occasions. I most certainly knew I would get caught tho and didn’t want to go to jail, but going back time after time because of some reason or another was devastating in its own right. It is the lesser of two evils.
P.S. I was very young and do not have the desire to Murder anyone. I did get counseling y’all.
Thank you. That was imo a very good comment and not from theoretically view.
I hope you are doing well now.
Nikki is given way too much credit for playing the part of the villain. Fact: a woman will do whatever is necessary to protect her children. This story could easily have ended in Chis murdering his wife and children.
It would have ended that way had she not killed him
@@sarahsmith3682 agreed.
Hey there Dr. Grande! 👋🏼
I was just thinking about how I’d love an update on this case.
I hope you are well!
Very good analysis, especially on guilt beyond reasonable doubt vs actually guilty 👍🏻
60 second standing ovation for your good common sense combined With legal and reality based analysis.
Thank you, dr g. This case is infuriating, this woman was BRUTALIZED and it is well known that attempts to leave your abuser is frequently the tipping point that results in your death. Why couldn’t she just leave? Well he woke up, grabbed a gun, aimed it at her and was preparing to shoot, so, umm....?
Last time I beg you to analyze someone but can u analyze JESSE PINKMAN? He’s such an interesting character and I can’t stop rewatching Breaking Bad again. Your channel is more addictive than the whole blue Meth! 😅
Since when is a normal woman is going to lose her children?
Would love your thoughts on the Yorkshire Ripper and the new Neflix series about him. It was truly awful that he got away with it for so long because the victims were labelled as prostitutes from the very beginning and as such the public support for an investigation was non existent - that's until a young "respectable" girl was killed. Fascinating case.
Great analysis Dr. Grande! Thank you.
Was waiting for this! Love your videos. It helps makes my commute on the train bearable.
Very interesting!! Please do a video on Edwin Lara soon!
Hello from your new Patreon member.
Can you please discuss Trangenders. This is very common and has become politicized. We need clear thinking people like you to discuss this.
Oh yes please! I find it very difficult to even ask polite questions about this issue without being labelled transphobic
Don’t you think this miracle man treaded enough dangerous water with this topic alone?
Oooh, so now Dr. G is a mind reader I see, lol.. I literally just watched about this on CourtTv 2 days ago and here we are.. Still would like to see you do the school shooter TJ Lane.. I cannot find much information on him, what it all was that happened, why he did it etc so I can try and analyze it for school and so hoping you could find more in your capacity and intellect.. You're a huge roll model for PhD students like myself. I talk about you a lot in class..
Great one as usual. Thanks for covering it. Could you do one on Lorena Bobbitt please. Keep up the good work and take care.
Always excited for a new video by the good Doctor..
Doctor Grande you are amazing! Could you please do a diagnosis on the fictional character Basil Fawlty from the British comedy Fawlty Tower's? Thank you so much for your fantastic content.♥️ and happy holidays ☃️
I've never heard of this case but this was a veryyyy interesting video! 💕
OCD is killing me .
I actually struggled with the counting, touching items behaviors as a pre-adolescent, and then other behaviors symptomatic of a stressful childhood. But, I am curious, was that a simple statement of fact, that 10 people agreed with? Do they know you, or are they fellow sufferers? I'm teasing. If it was a statement of fact, obviously, I sympathize. Mostly, I just love this channel and wondered if one of his signature jokes went over my head:)
She sent a text saying she hasn't figured out how to kill him yet six weeks earlier. The gun was touching his head when it was fired. He was either asleep or unconscious.
He might very well have been an abuser, a horrible abuser.
Sorry but that doesn't allow you to shoot a person in the head, especially if they are asleep or unconscious.
The jury believed that she was a victim of abuse. They also believed that she was a master manipulator.
They heard all the evidence, from both sides, yet found her guilty. The master manipulator part is what makes me pause.
Even the Doctor in this video says it's possible that she made up some or all of of this that still doesn't excuse murder.
Umm doc you say she's not guilty beyond a reasonable doubt but then say you believe she murdered him.
The fact that she probably used his phone to make searches makes me see why the jury saw her as a master manipulator.
This is really interesting! Could you possibly do an analysis of Lia Marie Johnson I think she’s in a dire situation thank you !
Thank you Dr. Grande! Do you think you could talk about Don's character in Mad Men?
Hey Dr. G, Thanks for addressing this case. Very odd case.
No one should EVER talk to the authorities. Under no circumstances.
Especially in here in Canada - I have just found that you are not entitled to have an attorney present during questioning.
@@sherunswithscissors wait what?
@@Sarah.Riedel I don't necessarily know the specifics about having your solicitor present during questioning.
Thank you Dr, Grande. X
That was an excellent analysis!
I wish she would've at least got a lighter sentence!
If she were so afraid of him that she feared for her life she would not call him stupid
There’s been an update in the case, she’s now only serving 2-3 years in prison under the domestic violence survivor act
Actually 7.5 total with additional 5 years probation.
Appreciate you breaking this down more! When I heard about it I was LIVID! But diving more into the details I must agree that she intentionally killed him, it was no self-defense. And that's incredibly unfortunate because one cannot understand being a victim of abuse unless they themselves have gone through it. I imagine she was fed up and murder was the easiest out. The safest way to ensure he wouldn't come for her and his children. And it's just really sad to be honest :(
The jury?! How can people still say in this day and age "why didn't she just leave" ?! 🤯
It's mindblowing the number of people who believe it's easy to leave their abuser. The vast majority of people engage in that victim blaming mentality. That's why victims like Nikki Addimando, who endure years of torture and abuse, end up imprisoned.
@@sarahsmith3682 so the alternative is to kill someone while they slept and is currently not a threat?
@@jtrocks39 Is this how you interpret Sarah's reply? Are you intentionally misinterpreting it or proving Tessa's and Sarah's point by way of irony? Genuinely confused.
@@NelikNe I’m not misinterpreting anything. She is literally justifying Nikki’s actions of murdering someone.
Bcs thats a very reasonable thing to ask when you just commited murder.
I'm always excited for your content Dr. Grande. I love watching you with my morning coffee! Great video as always
Layla Maree it’s 5:00 pm in San Antonio Texas 😩
It's almost 09:00 in Queensland, Australia! 🙂
Hello, fellow Dr. Grande fans! It’s currently 22:48 here in the UK!
Lorna Ginette Harrison go to sleep!! It’s a school night
There was reasonable, REASONABLE doubt. Sad.
Oh and I have a few requests for future subjects!
- Roger Stone
- Dave Chappelle
- Brooke Shields
-“Memento”
- Shia LaBeof
- Mitch McConnell (there’s a great podcast about him from “Embedded”)
- Billie Holiday
- James Baldwin
- The events at Chernobyl
- Mahatma Gandhi
- Joan of Arc
- Chairman Mao
- Joseph Stalin
- Salvador Dali
- John Lennon
- Harriet Tubman
- Nina Simone
- Grey Gardens!
Ok um... that’s probably enough 😂
Dr Grande do a video about Cindy James! That case is truly baffling
Isn’t that literally Roxie’s defence in the movie/musical Chicago? The boyfriend reaches for the gun but she gets it first and shoots him. Of course the reality was he dumped her and she shot him in a rage.
I love it! You should do a video on the great splitting hairs vs deciphering emojis debate! Your dry humor is hilarious.
I am shocked that jury members are so ignorant they didn't understand why women don't "just leave "
Welcome to earth.
To be honest, I still struggle with that subject too. In some cases, I do see why a woman was so damaged that she couldn't make that decision, but in others, absolutely not. They had decent paying jobs to earn their own money, they were educated, they had friends and family that begged them to leave and offered their help. They also had law enforcement that knew the truth but couldn't do anything until the woman was honest. Most importantly, if you have children, even if you don't care enough about yourself, as a mother you would want to protect your children and get them out of that environment. I do have sympathy for women (or men) that are abused like this, but I also have my doubts.
@@LariaX I understand what you are saying . Usually the abuse doesn't start until the victim is firmly committed to the relationship . At first At least there are loving times and intense feelings . The abuse usually starts as one off attacks. Sometimes she goes to friends and family who feel betrayed when she returns to him . This isolates her which is perfect for him. The leaving is a process it takes time and usually the victim is not clear headed. She will doubt her own mind due to the gaslighting ,fear lack of sleep etc. Most of us do not abandon a relationship, romantic or not without trying to fix things . We believe things will get better if ( name anything here, a new job , counseling, more money , New place to live .etc ) The victim has to get through to the point where she/he can and will step over the love and leave . Sadly by this point she probably feels she will die. It is likely by now no one believes in her . That's why refuges or shelters are so important . They will pick up the pieces when everyone else has given up on her. ( I don't blame them for this at all ) supporting victims is hard work and the victim will probably leave many times before a permanent shift .
The victim is also exhausted and stressed , it's hard to make such a big move when you are already depleted . Thus it usually requires a crisis to provide the momentum to get away .
i thought this was about the nickocado avocado when i read the title XD thought the youtube drama escalated dramatically!
Thank you for covering this story
Wow, this whole thing is really disturbing. If you’re a victim *forget it*.
A side note, CPS has completely f*cked me over as well...
I am right with you
CPS only "fucks over" women with mental health and substance abuse issues. So, ya know, there's that.
@@Slickmickyoyo97 wow that’s an incredibly ignorant and untrue statement.
And at the time of my need for CPS for my daughter I was the primary provider for years and had been sober for years.
F off
@@Slickmickyoyo97 huh?
TY. Please analyze the Ross Harris murder case. He was convicted of murder, he said he forgot his child was in the car left in the hot parking lot. Was he guilty of murder or not.
He is seeking a new trial. His defence maintains he didn't receive a fair trial. What a load of BS.
Dr. Grande, please, please, PLEASE cover the Trisha/Ethan situation from the Frenemies podcast. I am dying to hear your take on it!
I have the feeling the sentence is to hard ... victims often stay with their manipulator like you say.
Maybe but do we know she was a victim?
@@coweatsman all of the injuries on her body on a regular basis.
I agree with you. I certainly think she should've left and in my opinion, murdering Chris was absolutely unacceptable. I highly doubt she would've ended up in possession of his firearm in a struggle, that's just a ridiculous story. Yes I feel for victims of DV as I have BEEN a victim, and although I feel strongly, I don't condone shooting and killing someone. Due process. Take them to court. Call the police. Leave. There's tons of options and I just don't believe her story. This is happening A LOT and I think these women believe that if they tell their story of violence and assault that it's going to be accepted and praised and they'll get off easy. I'm not a fan of this trend.
Will you ever make any more counseling role play videos featuring different kinds of mental illnesses?
Hey Dr. Grande, I really enjoy your videos and insight. I would like to see your opinion on Wendy Williams. Particularly addressing the bizarre behavior on one of her shows recently and also how she addressed it on the following show. She was accused of being under the influence. Thanks! (Watch her show on RUclips from 10/23/2020)
I think 2 things can be true someone can be a victim of dv and also murder someone. I don't think she did it in self defense but I do think she may have been pushed to it. So getting 7 years she got off easier than most would.
@Dr. Todd Grande
I'm not a "Professional"
but...I truly believe that her defense mechanism was on auto pilot in an ongoing a flight or fight response.
Doesn't make it right.
But, it should be a warning to love & protect the children you bring into this world.
Period.