Someone you love could be a sex worker | Valerie Scott | TEDxToronto
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- Опубликовано: 26 июн 2024
- On October 22, 2015, some of Toronto’s greatest thinkers and change-makers joined together onstage at TEDxToronto to deliver powerful talks and performances that embodied our theme, Thresholds.
To learn more visit: tedxtoronto.com.
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Valerie Scott is a Sex Worker & Advocate.
Valerie Scott always wanted to be a sex worker and has extensive experience in her chosen profession. She is a founding member and legal co-ordinator of Sex Professionals of Canada, a sex worker rights organization. She has been a passionate advocate for her colleague's human, civil, and legal rights for the past 30 years. She has testified at Canada's Senate and at several Parliamentary committees. She has spoken at numerous community meetings, colleges, universities, and conferences about the humanity of sex workers and the need for full decriminalization of adult sex work.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx
She is human. She reminds us that her colleagues are human and that they are all around us along with their clients. In most cases, they are filling a human need. We are all in this world together. Stop judging and be kind to each other.
yeah
@@SA77888 Simp
Lol I won’t be kind and I will judge.
@@alexs5744 F you! We will judge you everytime you have s*x and judge you too!
We don’t get to pay for that which was intended to be the most intimate & lasting of human connection. You find a mate, and strive to connect in the most touching of ways, for life. Those who take short cuts, damage their psyche & relationships in ways no one wants to admit, until the price is paid. The damage to the center of the brain which was made for lifetime physical connection, by cheapening it or worse paying for it rather than taking the time to form the bond it was meant to be cultured in - is bad for our mind, families & society. This line of work is damaging for all parties - though this woman is so damaged she can’t even see it & instead brags about & propagates it in a Ted Talk.
I can only hope everyone will hear this wonderful story and the message from this courageous and amazing woman that we all need to hear.
i found this video by accident... very inspirational... here i was complaining i have to fight for my rights at work... i'm a ballet teacher, at least i GET to defend myself... some people can't even do that
These choices this woman enjoys do not exist for women being trafficked and pimped. We need to protect women's rights to choose sex work, and also women's rights to not be victimized by pimps and madames. Violence against a person, PROSTITUTE OR NOT, should not be met with the arrest of the victim under any circumstance. That is insane.
The most unbiased judgement.
Well, prostitution is illegal. That's like a drug dealer demanding protection because his or her supplier is demanding more money than initially agreed upon for the drugs the supplier forwarded.
@@HopyHop1 No. People who are trafficked are FORCED into prostitution. They don't choose it. Imagine if someone held a gun to your head and forced you to swallow drugs and then sent you through the airport to smuggle them, and you knew that if you were caught, no one would believe you that it wasn't your fault. THAT is the situation we're talking about here.
@@RavynSkye617 Are you saying that those employed as law enforcement have no interest in enforcing laws against kidnapping? I won't be able to drive 20 blocks without a police officer pulling me over if I drive without license plates, but those same officers aren't concerned with real crimes like kidnapping. How did we end up in such a backwards world?
@@HopyHop1 Comparing prostitution with drug use? Hmm… 🤔
Valerie, an amazing speech. You are very articulate and well spoken.
Great, measured delivery. Message sent loud and clear.
ANYBODY WHO THINKS PROSTITUTION IS ACCEPTABLE IS A PIECE OF SHIT
yes, agreed, until you go to third world country, and you realize the mothers you are feeding also sell themselves so they can feed their children. Take a trip and donate your time. you will see things differently, I think. and ceasar is not god, and yes, muhammad sucks.
Ehhhh no, it's just your barbaric, feral, bias
@@peterfitzgerald7734 as are humans!
Valerie, You've made me reconsider many views that I've held about prostitution, and a persons right and ability to say yes, or no. Your rights are no less important than anyone else's. I live in a marriage where there has not been sex for seven years.
my wife did this to me. she is an asshole...sorry to hear. don't know if it is a medical problem in your marriage, but it wasn't in mine
wow, you figured that all out from my post?. not that my wife was crazy bitch who for years thought God told her she was going to marry a famous singer, and that I would die. oh, yes, also, that the famous singer's wife would also die so she could marry this man.well, it has been 7 years, and I am not dead, neither is the famous singer's wife. she is a freak. destroyed our family for nothing. she was mentally ill before we married, I thought I could help her. but one day, she turned her mental illness against me. this is not my fault. I was good, faithful husband, and good father. Women who withhold sex in marriage are deliberately sabotaging marriage. I define such woman as an asshole. A BOOK SAYS,... THE FOOLISH WOMAN TEARS DOWN HER HOUSE WITH HER OWN HANDS...... I know many men don't deserve to have a wife, but this was not our situation. HJ, you can't judge every situation. Yes, there were some things I could do better in marriage. But this was her responsibility. YES,,, I am a victim. I only wanted to be faithful husband and father......
Marek K Have you tried counseling? I have participated in counseling at different times in my life and it has saved me. One thing I have learned is I am not a victim I have choices. Good luck.
I just recently gave this advice to my step-son who proposed to his girlfriend: "The first year of your marriage you put a penny in a jar every time you have sex. After the first year your goal is to take a penny out of the jar every time you have sex...you'll never empty that jar". For me, sex is just a way to get to know someone more intimately. After that it normally becomes a chore for one or the other.
yes, years of counseling. she didn't even want sex on wedding night. we were not together before marriage. if she didn't need me, or a man in general, she should not have made marriage contract to make man miserable for ten years.
Moving, poignant, and inspiring. Thank you so much for expressing these things, Valerie & TEDx.
I wish everyone in this world listen her speech here. Valerie Scott, you are such an amazing woman.
I've been married 51 years and you brought tears to my eyes when you told about the man who had lost his wife to cancer and just held you and cried and talked about how much he loved his wife and how cold the house was now. That would be me for sure.
Have you ever been sold something horrible because of the way it was marketed? This is exactly it.
Full of conflicts and absolute nonsense. And what if a person whom I happen to know, or even myself, did something wrong? That doesn't make it any right! STDs originate from such relationships. And most men who seek such relationships don't want to be held accountable for a family. Whenever they want to leave, they just turn their back and disappear. So why not build a secure family and spend the time with your clean mate and innocent kids! Make a strong bond a generation can lean on.
This is a really great talk. Very sad that Canada has unfortunately taken a very regressive stand in this matter. I have always admired sex workers for the amazing job you all do, in spite of the extraordinary obstacles put forth to the very practice of your profession. People say how can we allow women to sell their bodies, but no body is selling bodies. Sex workers sell sexual services. They use their bodies to provide the services. If that is a crime, so is every profession. What about a doctor or an engineer selling their brains? Should that also be criminalized?
people scare to take position on....
So true. I say legalize it and get off the high moral horse so they can protect themselves or call for protection without fear. Legalizing prostitution will also help to get rid of the worst predators trafficing the vulnerable.
Kinda really sleazy, women only did this who could not read or write, libtards are odd ducks.
Incredible speech. Congrats, dear Valerie. So sad this video still has so few views. It really deserves millions. Really. Best regards from my heart. Wish you the best.
Absolutely. Great talk. And also, real Libertarians have fought for this concept for years in the struggle for real freedom. Author and columnist Vin Suprynowicz talked about it in one of his books back in the nineties and probably before that. We're with ya!
World needs more Libertarians in life and this country.
"...moving from a place where we are quick to judge, to a place where we are curious and ask questions, and respect each other because at the heart of everything we know we are all human."
Let it be written in the holy wars, corruption, cruelty, injustice, and life knows where else it must be written so this world comes true.
An extremely well presented advocacy of libertarian ideals. Women are not tribal property.
Play at x1.25 speed and everything goes back to normal. Have a good day.
thank you
Proof positive that the Internet shrinks your attention span.
Much better. I thought she had some kind of impairment.
Thanks
THANK YOU FOR THIS!
Ty for being brave, determined, confident enough to voice extremely important viewpoints.
Absolutely Amazing!! So On point, I applaud her courage and passion🙏😄
D. Lol she make it so nice but is not mast man last 5 mins when they pay hahaha
Shout out from New Zealand!
Brave woman and well spoken painting the reality of her trade. No one has the right to judge and this lady has my utmost respect. Hope you attain your dreams and goals
Why not? I would never choose a job like that & im horrified that anyone could do that to themselves. The world makes me so sad
no, brave is going out onto a battlefield. Americans are so superficial with words.
Oh my goodness. This woman is a real person coming out of my own dreams. I loved to follow her; follow this splendid topic/speech. And by the way, this fighting and dreaming woman, Valerie Scott, is a dream come true for me. Best, fuf
Wow!! This was an amazing talk. I personally support every single word said by her. Unrelated, beautiful woman.
Thanks for uploading this video. Her talking is easy to understand and listen. It's always refreshing to listen to different perspective.
The typical dysfunctional marriage is like a complicated bartering arrangement. The "oldest profession in the world" seems more straightforward and honest. Valerie is very progressive and well-spoken! :-)
You have admire her for her courage.
One of the most elegant Women I’ve ever heard and seen in my entire life ❤️
you are an amazing woman!! thank you so much for being who you are and never giving up, dont worry, a rally call is being sent out, this fight isnt over yet!
mel
Charming lady!! Her message moves conscience.
Very well articulated! Informative and thought provoking. Great talk
Sounds like Canada has gone the wrong way at this time. I hope your industry becomes safe for all and I think you're in it for the right reasons. It can be a legit career without judgement.
Yeah... if the country illegalizes buying sex, but doesn't illegalize consenting sex, then doesn't that mean that a customer should stiff the prostitute on the payment?
Love you Valerie! Wonderful talk!
An excellent talk. Very informative and thought provoking. Well done.
Hey .Valerie Scott .. You and i use to dance in bars ( we were strippers) nice to see you are still going strong ... Do you remember me " Strawberry Cher " here !
*used to
Hey Valerie.. I need to add we also stripped at the Old Victory Burlesqu in Toronto. I think there is a need for what you do .. LOL
I think the second Carol is fake.
this is iconic aweeee ♥️♥️♥️♥️
Valerie. I applaud ur consistent courage thru the years to move this issue forward.... well done .... in the name of equality for ALL and hoping that one day Canada will be truly a just and highly evolved society not only in words. but action....i look forward to meeting u again soon ... Katherine Merlot....
@wesolekcleaner W If you learn even basic spelling and what words are and where they go,people might pay more attention . You make it sound like your not at all smart.
@wesolekcleaner W What makes you think she doesn´t use proper protection? And she doesn´t ask for any glorification. Just equal rights, and not double punishment, from predators or unjust laws...
@wesolekcleaner W Maybe she protect herself?
Thank you so much Valerie.
beautiful message.
I feel that we should make sex work legal, but regulate it. Have it so no one under a certain age can be a sex worker, or hire one. Things like that.
which age exactly
Ebony Panther that’s still young
@Ebony Panther m m
VERY good speech
I used this video to tell the people close to me about what I do❣️❣️❣️❣️
I wish I COULD pay taxes! Instead... Charity.
Could you say this to everyone in my life? Because I'm terrified of saying this to a lot of people.
Absolutely Amazing!! So On point, I applaud her courage and passion🙏😄
Great speech. Thank you Valerie
That story about the man whose wife died of cancer made me teary-eyed. :,(
Me too. That bit was incredibly poignant.
very professional presentation. unfortunately our society pretend to be doing the good by always ruling out the nature of things. maybe if sex worker would be more organized and our judges stop being puritans. i like very much this presentation and i will recommend it to others as well.
Good talk. Well done for giving this interesting talk. Thank you.
I am very happy that this woman is happy with her profession, however, even she has to admit that many women involved in sex work have been trafficked and the tricky part is protecting those women without stigmatizing and criminalizing those who genuinely chose sex work of their own volition and whose consent is genuine. Many sex workers, especially street level prostitutes have a history of abuse, a history addiction, and a current situation of pimps who take their money, beat them, and abuse them emotionally, mentally, physically, and sexually. The girls keep NOTHING in that world.
Many people who pick tomatoes or strawberries have been trafficked, too. But for some reason, whenever someone gets upset about THAT, the first thought isn't "Maybe we should just illegalize tomatoes and strawberries because some of those people have been trafficked".
So it's true what you say that there is a lot of trafficked and abused women out there, but If it were legal to choose the profession it would be easier to help those being trafficked and pimped out. It would be easier to see who's doing the abusing. During prohibition people went to "illegal" speakeasies that were run by the underground instead of going to the store or an above board bar. People would just visit a legal sex workers place instead of going to a trafficker or pimp.
Ravyn Skye decriminalization would dramatically improve the safety of not only sex workers who do it by choice, but also the victims and children. the myths and stereotypes around prostitution make many people mistakenly believe they are almost the same thing. victims are afraid to speak up for fear of being outted and disrespected by law enforcement and society, criminalized, and finally released from prison or jail back into the same cycle of poverty and desperation that caused them to be victimized in the first place.
Ravyn Skye look over the FBI crime data base under human (sex) trafficking. In 2015 there were 744 TOTAL cases reported of which only 310 were cleared or rather confirmed. That isn't an epidemic especially when compared to the number of prostitution arrests that result in thoroughly damaging lives! Both are human rights violations- forced sex labor and arresting people for prostitution. It's not tricky either- decriminalize consensual prostitution and you'll be dramatically changing the situation! New Zealand did it 13 years ago and NZ hasn't seen a rise in forced Sex labor and the quality of life has been raised for sex workers. A brothel worker won a case of sexual harassment, if a client doesn't pay or is violent the provider can and do call the police, another case involving a man being charged for removing the condom was brought forth. It's amazing to have equal protection under law! To criminalize prostitution you are not preventing a single case of forced sex labor. It is a false myth that criminalizing prostitution protects ANYONE. It only harms! Fight to Decriminalize prostitution if you care about these human beings- victims of forced sex labor or consensual sex workers shouldn't be arrested and they ARE. Including minors! Who btw report that POLICE hurt them more than anyone including pimps because the majority of people in the sex trade including minors are not working under a pimp! With the internet people (minors and adults) work of their own volition in the majority of cases. Research supports this but the 'army of pimps' myth is strong and anti prostitutionists need a boogie man in their narrative. Yes there are pimps but nowhere close to what the narratives claim.
PROSTITUTES SHOULD BE HURT THEY ARE NOT HUMAN, THEY ARE DEMONS THAT NEED TO BE ROOTED OUT FROM SOCIETY. BUT I WILL ADMIT SOME WIVES SHOULD PLEASE THEIR HUSBANDS BETTER BUT SO SHOULD SOME HUSBANDS PLEASE THEIR WIVES BETTER AS WELL. PROSTITUES STILL SHOULD NOT EXIST.
its true what she said I am educated well 15 years in IT and I choose it from my heart I am Mistress and intime specialist, I really like my work
I wish governments would actually consider of the unintended consequences of the laws they pass. I'm referring to the Canadian law you spoke of.
That is a well delivered speech, a great presentacion of one's profession, in a career with passionate conviction. Thank you Valerie.
This was the best TED talk I have seen.
Your courage is inspiring. Thank you! 🙌
Although I've never paid to have sex with someone it did cross my mind that somehow, someday, I could fall in love with someone with such background due to the fact that love is indeed blind.
PrimiusLovin dude is not because is blind is because most many young girls 18-24 try it at least one time.
Everyone got mentality of get money
do u have a girlfriend or a wife
Valerie, you are so clear in your message, and I agree with you 100%. I could not have said it better. Thank you.
Awesome talk!
This is rather sad. Valerie Scott is articulate and tells some uncomfortable truths.
Amazing talk !!!
She is amazing
Thank you.
Regards,
Geoff. Reeks
Brilliant woman!! Powerful insight and truth.
Wow this just made me tear up ✊😢
Got alots conversant related to every kind os topic which is very important to understand for all human beings... thanku TED to being such a part of our life's and providing every single knowledge and i think we've got alot about everything.... we must need to reproduce our basics duties to maintain peace and create a world who would be full of sober and having respect for all human beings..... Be authentic for all kind of work either related to pious organisation or either related to high tech related issues ...
She is super sympathic.
The points she makes are clear and interesting. And her jokes in between lighten the mood.
I personally wouldn't visit a prostitute, cause it's never the same as having sex with someone you have at least high sympathy for, if not even love.
The money involved makes it impossible to know if she might actually like the customer or is just acting.
I just prefer someone who says "yes!" to me personally and my body without being affected by "needing the money for living" in her decision. If I even think about having to get out of the room and couldn't snuggle, just because of "time is up, goodbye" what's the point of intimicy in the first place?
To me sex isn't just sex. Its about sex, intimicy and sharing.
"Intimacy". 33 years together. I miss it.
Great talk, thank you!!!
Bravo to this brave woman. Excellent.
great speech, great person !
Maravilloso.
Claro.
Y valiente.
Muchas gracias por ayudarme a entender
6:22 - that's one of her clients in the audience
what a great speach! i love her!! bravo
When the men are happy, there is no war. It is a public service and should be legal. The girls and guys should be well taken care of.
Well said.
Very well expressed Valerie Scott. :)
Great delivery.
Thank you for what you do!
Your talk speaks exactly the opposite of the previous one I watched, an ex-policewoman sharing her views. I think you approach it from am entirely different perspective, with the luxury of much more choice and self-respect built in. So many of the women trafficked into sex work these days do not have that choice. I have respect for you that you did, and that you fight for a safer environment for women who do.
And right now, I will indulge my good man more than ever in his fantasies for I never want him to be seeing 'love' or sexual fantasies elsewhere when it's all here right at home.
That's good to hear,keep your man happy.
@@carolhunter9342 Also to Irene that's sweet best regards to both of you
What's the timestamp for the interesting part?
There’s so many men that would love to have you as a life partner when your older it doesn’t matter what you did they will still love you
Thank you Valerie.
Sadly true. Be kind to those who have no choice they can see except sordidity.
Brilliant!!!
Well spoken... this is the Real Truth of this job
Great.. now how can I book you?!
thank you for the information, i learned a few things. rg, kiril
This what is up!, She is so right, escorts have to make a living too, its time to stop the judging and show the love!
That's the sad part....no love there, if you know what I mean.
I have to say that my predisposed opinion of prostitutes is just what it is, as she said, drugged out or damaged goods. However, I have to say that she seems to be very intelligent and like any regular person.
There are all kinds of women “forced” into the business, To suggest otherwise is disingenuous.
shes a spoilt new worlder what would she know lol
Wow! Thank you for sharing your story. I personally believe that if prostitution became legal we wouldn't hear about these horror stories of women being forced into the sex trade. I don't know, maybe I'm wrong on that front but I think it would at least put a dent in it. I know several countries have legalized prostitution, such as New Zealand, Australia, and Denmark just to name a few. I'm curious as to what your thoughts are on how to we could make prostitution legal in the U.S. or at the least decriminalize it.
I would welcome your thoughts on the matter.
Best regards,
Jerry,
One way you could talk to your Mayor or City council or State Congress.. You could get a following online as well people who are in your community.. They can legalize it in any city in the US if you want we just have to talk about it online and talk to our representatives and community to see what they think and try to get it legal. It's not illegal in the US just if you traffick people.
I would disagree with claiming that forced prostitution is a myth. I'm glad that for this lady it wasn't/isn't the case but it is for a lot of women and men out there. Legalising prostitution and treating it as a service like any other would drastically decrease this though in my opinion, so I'm definitely on board!
I agree with her 100%.
So integrated by now, it takes a certain kind of lived in field work to differentiate origins and up front impressions among the seemingly all inexperienced. I believe thats why I am experiencing this clash of returning (and new) entities to and from known communal zones. And thats why I can't pursue it expecting things from new vulnerable naive eyes anymore.
Sounds like a first lady
what a queen. i want her to adopt me 🥺♥️
God has already Blessed you.
Thank you madam.
They are your brothers, colleagues...
you forgot to mention ....and me.
What a lovely lady!!
Cheers ma'am!
I would *..*
and in the next ted talk a former police officer talks about no one wants to do it etc I think its probably closer to traffic then pretty woman
a neutral position would be to legalize prostitution but not trafficking or pimping
I have more respect for her than some women I knew =)
Her voice makes "a cold river" run down my back.
Agree , to reduce crime against women, one of the solution is making it legal, but to absolutely stop crime only education and culture to respect woman from childhood is more better solution.
And the public
Thats why I don't love anyone easily.