Just when I thought I was free of narcissists because I had gained discernment, my son's girlfriend dumped him by leaving a note on the door and texting ME to tell me to give it to him. I sat down with the two of them (they are teens) and during the course of a discussion, I asked her several questions to gauge her empathy. Her answers indicated that she doesn't have any. So now my poor boy has experienced his first narcissistic discard and devaluation. I hope it will be his last. Guys, they are everywhere.
heck no it's just beginning. but he will be strong and resilient. it's such an advantage honestly. he's beyond lucky to have a good dad like you and this future advancement
I started studying Narcissism 7 years ago. It only took 2 weeks to figure out He was a narcissist. I quickly got away. I dated him 3 months and left him. I moved and made myself unavailable to him . He had no idea as to where i was. I deleted all social media and changed my phone number. I ran into him a year later and of course, he hoovered, but nothing worked. Best move i ever made!! I'm still educating myself today! A narcissistic relationship is the most horrific thing anybody can get involved in. Run! People and never look back. I never thought those kind of people existed in this world!! Get Away!!❤
Narcissists are disappointing, it's like going to your moms house to make a crispy buttery grilled cheese sandwich then opening the butter container to find old baked beans 😮
Recently, my son while working out at his local gym, was approached by 2 gym members who asked him, "Are you a Christian?" My son answered, "Yes", but was surprised by the two guys' question and asked them why they asked that. They said, they have noticed him over time at the gym and see how he treats others. My son is a bodybuilder and gym members are constantly asking him stuff how they can improve their workouts, etc. members appreciate his expertise and taking time to help them. The 2 guys told my son, they thought he's a Christian because it shows in his face. My son was surprised by their answer and appreciated it. I told my son, yes, true Christianity shines through a person, it can be felt. One doesn't need to proclaim they're one and they don't need to prominently display a cross. Being a Christian carries a responsibility in following Christ in how we live and love others.
God designed my Discard and holds my hand . 19 months No Contact. I am no longer a Carnal Christian. I have the knowledge at 56 years of age and know now I was brought up in a family of Narcissists. We thrivers need to give ourselves Grace with all the abuse and trauma we’ve been through. I am back in church and doing small group Bible study. My life has been difficult, but God sees me and has always been with me. I wait for His timing now. I submit to His Will. Thank you Dave. You and Paula from Narc Con are the best.
“You start to hate mankind… You start to hate people!”So true dave! I am a registered nurse and I absolutely love people and have always felt pretty jovial and enjoy conversation with my patients. 4 1/2 years in I begin feeling so impatient with my patients and my children, and really only felt good when things were going ”well”, with the narc. All I could do was desire to get out of my patient room and get back to my computer, which is completely 100% unlike myself. I am now 10 months exactly no contact and I am feeling myself enjoying my job again, although there are still days, I greive, I am feeling myself laughing again, and enjoying the personalities of my patients and my friends and family! Thank you so much for your videos… They have literally saved me! Praise God, he is so good!
We are in the end times and the elite that control this realm are creating or bringing out narcissists in there droves social media has a lot to do with it but people are being told they have one life ! Live your best life this creates greed and hate out of people believing there’s nothing else after death it’s disgraceful
I understand the grief you experience from time to time because it's not what you planned, but then I remember that I'm Free, 🎉 to share my life and my time with Jesus 🙏😂
The narcissist pretends that there caring and loving during the LoveBomb after the LoveBomb they argue one second they love you the next and they try to get you to question your reality in every conversation
The night I met him I was due to be at choir rehearsal, but I ditched it, and that took me into 22 years of mayhem with this narcissist. I finally left one night while we both were supposed to be at work I moved out into my own placeand I haven’t looked back thank God
The devil goes after the creme of the crop..those that have a purpose and a mission for God, the devil wants to destroy that person but the victory belongs to Jesus!!! Dave thank you for your amazing, Holy Spirit filled videos!
Terrible stress/fear of being left in desperate situations without means. It happened repeatedly. Sleepless nights....days without food...walking on eggshells...chest pain...terrible abdominal pain...on and on it goes.
Go get a job…pray to GOD to take away your pain - because when you do - it actually happens immediately! And then you pray to GOD to give you the MAN you’re supposed to be with- and HE WILL. BLOCK THIS PERSON WHO’s destroying your soul. He’s joy is to see you this hurt- don’t give it to him. - NOW walk on top of him…FOREVER.
The aging covert Narc pretended to be like he wasn't aging, never admitting to not being able to hear as well or even his vision getting bad. The ugly ones will waste way more of your time, sadly. thanks Dave!
These comments are disturbing; I’m so glad I decided to stay single… Dealt with the Malignant one time and 4 Covert, I’m sticking with God. He has been the only one who has ever added value to my life!!
Looking back i was too trusting......he appeared to be so interested at the start but it was like you said......they were collecting inventory to be used at a future date......i was making excuses for poor behaviour all the time, hoping he would change. But he never did. When i finally figured him out, he threw me away and our family like we were trash. 30 + years of being married meant nothing to him. God removed me from this nightmare last year, hurt and broken but HE has filled the void with his love and I'm healing. Thank you Dave. You're right God gave me dreams about him and he was caught messaging other women and planning to meet up.
They best is when they try to recreate you, the life you provided, and even cook the foods you used to but fail at it. They even have the new supply recreating the home you gave her, try to convince themselves he’s just like you, and even have the new suplly dress like you. My kids always come home and say how mom tried to cook something like you and it was gross. Thank God for this, and other channels, guiding us towards healing and we can chuckle at their attempts to recreate what they threw away.
After wrenching free, I have Zero empathy for these weasels. They cannot get any more of my energy. They stole enough time, money, and genuine love. Thank you for your healing clarity!
I have not gotten a hoover phone call yet to my understanding maybe I did but I did not pick up the phone for numbers I don't know. But in January 2024 the 4th yes I don't forget the discard date one of the days the transformed my life will mark 2 year's since being discarded. Ok to business. I believe that how you were discarded the level of damage done is the longer the narcissist waits to try to come back to you. The narcissist is not stupid they know what they done. If minimal damage has been done the narc will try to return to you quicker. If they just dropped a warhead missile on a person it may take about 5 to 10 years for the dust to settle and that's when you may hear from them. The trick is they want you to believe they changed. They have not! They only changed supply! Let's not be deceived any longer, the pain they have caused too me and you do you really want to go through that again? Let's move on God removed these people for a reason out our lives he's got something better for us! Let's do our part and stay strong and believe in his promises. 🙏🏾💪🏾❤️
In the 5 years we were together he had opened up 3 times. The first time he told me he was bullied as a child. The other 2 times he was crying but I couldn’t make sense of what he was saying but we were hugging. He stopped opening up- there were no more heart to heart conversations.
I took my narcissist ex back not knowing what narcissism was when he came back he got so petty he must have been throwing out my clothes hair ties 😒 you are so confused you think you misplaced something all along they just didn't want you to have anything you enjoyed when you really are gone they regret the things they didn't get to hurt you by.. ty🌹
@@PanelsWainio I gave up my apartment moved with him. First argument he an his friend threw my things all over the driveway I got another apartment now . Glad I'm free
An ex-narc called me over to him at a party we were both attending and when I approached him, he threw a drink in my face in front of everyone. I punched him in his jaw so hard in front of everyone, and then poised myself and walked away with my head held high. The look on his face due to the stares and whispers he received was Epic! He wanted to put on a show and I gave him one😏
The more I accept my mistakes accept my past shame and mistakes and sins I've come to really find out that I'm much more stronger then everyone who failed at Tearing Me Down my whole life. Life's a journey I intend I'm not wasting the remainder of my journey God bless you cheers
Dave, your videos are SO reassuring to victims of narcissistic abuse because of your godly perspective on narcissism and because your knowledge and understanding of this spirit is so exacting! I certainly appreciate you and may God bless you in Jesus name!
They withhold everything that's near and dear to your heart. The list is made during the love bomb, they're working hard at that time. It's only during the discard phase that you'll see any more energy/effort from them , at that point it's demonic and it's directed at you. The account of pain they attempt to cause you, is commensurate to the amount of love bomb intensity that they provided.
Never doubt Dave You make a difference!!!!! My mother and one of my sisters are malignant narcissists.... Of course I didn't know it at the time...but I knew something wasn't right with both of them. Knowledge is power Dave. I thank you every day for making me aware of this nasty mental illness. I am an ampath and they can't stand it. I went no contact with my sister and I feel 100 percent better and happy. They effect your physical and mental health. Now I am free. My Mom passed 20 years ago......without a word of apology about the emotional...psychological abuse she inflicted on me as a child growing up.....and until her death. Thanks again Dave. I am so happy you found a truly good woman and that you are happy. You deserve it man!!!!
I don't usually write comments, but here's to hoping this will feel a bit therapeutic or enlighten someone else... In the beginning, I didn't want to listen to my gut because I like to give people the benefit of the doubt (word of advice, don't do that. Allow people to prove themselves through their actions and behavior. Look at how they treated their previous serious relationships). Three traumatic years later, here I am feeling so foolish for not listening to my gut instinct and for not applying what I knew about covert narcissists and narcissists in general. Man guys.. I really, really loved him.. but even that starts to feel confusing after some time because you find yourself seeing another side to this person that you don't even recognize and you start to feel alone because you only sometimes get to see those glimpses of who he "pretends" to be and maybe that's who I fell in love with. That's the "person" I stuck around for. Then I'd get berated for pointing out the discrepancies in his behavior/personality and my love would get questioned because he'd imply that I must not "love "all" of him then but only the "good parts" of him. That pushed me into wanting to prove my love more and more; even during the ugly times which slowly and gradually led me to become subservient. Before I knew it, I was constantly apologizing for the smallest of things because I just got so burnt out from arguing with him all the time. He was so nit-picky about everything; especially the things from my past- even though I'm pretty much an open book- to a fault, Doesn't matter though. If you overlook ONE detail from 5 or maybe even 10 years ago, he'll question eeeeeverything about you; even though you've remained pretty consistent in your present relationship otherwise. These people have extreme trust issues, so one oversight or mistake and you're not their lover anymore, you're a suspect. Also, pay attention to the patterns. They're there. I don't even know if HE realized it to be honest. I wasn't even LOOKING for them, but eventually something started to eat at me. I subconsciously felt something was off or maybe even felt.. familiar. As if I've seen this before. I don't think narcissists consciously do that. I tried to point it out to him because I loved him and I wanted us to become better people together, but of course that just pissed him off even more because he'd deflect and get defensive and say I was "invalidating his feelings." Watch out for that; especially the ones already familiar with psychology. They'll use it against you. I got to the point at the end of our relationship where I just couldn't un-see the patterns. I could literally predict when he would be in a mood (sometimes when I was sick or if things didn't go his way, or if I was happy in the company of other people. Hell, if they find out you're having a better day than they are, they'll strike with something from either 5 years ago or maybe even the way your tone was last week when you were talking about such and such. It never fails. They'll always find something to be bothered about and I honestly just couldn't be bothered anymore. I was so burnt out that I became indifferent. He used my indifference against me saying I was acting suspicious and acting like a "b****" or that I reminded him of his ex. That was enough for me to walk away. Trust me, the understanding and empathetic part of me could have kept fighting for the relationship, but once my boundaries were constantly being crossed and the name calling continued any time I was becoming frustrated and assertive, I'm out.
Brutal , soul murderers I was a widow , and he appeared ! I feel your pain I’ve experienced a second death mainly my own . Everything you just wrote I went through . But I’m gonna make it ! Molly Ringwald (they didn’t Brake me) ! Physician heal thyself.❤
i thought a decent person was easy to come by. i was a great person and the narcs had a mask on to seem great. i was duped. it’s not my fault. i was 16 when i met my first narc. then another one right after that. 7 years of constant torment. i’m so glad to be safe now and healing still.
I was young living in the flesh because I had such low low self esteem. I got married due to guilt of well I was already with this one and I didn’t want a “high body count” i felt sick to get married but I felt bad for his immigration status. My God is freeing me now. Lord help me.
Happy Friday to you too. He was controlling and behaved like a child at times. I gave him a few months to prove himself, but when the name calling happened I knew something wasn't adding up with this guy. I began to feel unhappy and felt insecurity around him. Then I found your channel and then I began to change towards him. He realised the change and avoided to see him. I had to tell him I met someone to get rid of him. Thankyou Dave, I am free from that loser.😅😅😅😅
At the discard I was CONSTANTLY referred to as a “stupid beoth”. I kept thinking of all the things to call me? Why? Stupid?!? I am highly educated with many accomplishments but stupid is not how anyone would describe me. Now I realize why he kept saying that- because I had the veil on my eyes and didn’t use discernment to SEE who he was because I loved him. All the while he was getting away with all kinds of debauchery, theft, cheating you name it. The joke was on me. So grateful to be out of that.
"trying to please this person, who actually hates you." That one hit pretty hard. My Narcissistic husband, while obviously hating me, would stand around mostly naked, and still try to touch me. It was absolutely degrading. I asked him..."are you in the habit of sleeping with people you hate?" Apparently they are.
I watch your videos several times a day. It’s been 4months since I kicked him out. I packed all his belongings and placed them outside the apartment. I had no clue why his behavior had shift. I got in contact with his ex and asked her questions and she had all the answers. She said he’s a narcissist and send me a link to your video now I am Mrs. A. Thank you for your service
I just left my boyfriend after 4 years. He was the most calculated discrete narcissist I have ever met. It took me 4 years to see his true colors. I lost friends, pushed family away and began to make excuses for his behavior. I lost myself and it took me finding out that he was talking to someone else behind my back to leave. I ignored the plethora of red flags for the sake of “love”. I truly pray for anyone who is bound to a person with this disorder. I also pray for anyone who has NPD and that they find God. Thanks for your help!
Current gf dealing with that right now. Never even dated him but he thinks they need to have children and marry. Dude was gonna leave his wife for her until I stepped in. Now his wife knows and he's without a spouse or a woman. Wasn't what I wanted to do but he was relentless I had no choice.
Incredibly accurate; I recently found out that my ex narc did know of me before I knew about him; I was lucky, received epiphany and it's been 8 months of healing ❤ great video, thank you!
It feel like order #66 has been activated...Narcs seem to be lossin it, it is time to abandon these empty vessels...Thank you so much, Dave...Love u too =-)
Dearest brother in Christ Jesus, thank you for your stewardship unto the Father, His children~ His kingdom . . . You are a blessing and inspiration to mankind, truly! . . . I am truly honored to have been led by the Holy Spirit to your knowledge understanding truth discernment and wisdom, as I have learned the intricacies of this end times plague upon this dying world, that we must endure to the end in faith and righteousness in overcoming all things, as we gain the promise of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, to know the truth in all things, as we live in the Atonement of His love for us in DOing His Fathers will upon all of His precious children . . . Thank you Dave, may His love and peace continually strengthen your beautiful heart, 😊 this day and forever I pray in the holy name of Jehovah . . . Amen.
Omg yesss. A new relationship I had recently was worming his way into my apartment. I broke it off. It was like what? I never asked you to move in here.
Jesus delivered me from the worst narc ever(the man that opened my eyes to this devilish world of naricissim.) after 3 and a half years. Tho, I will never be the same, and it took me years to recover. I am grateful to God for delivering me from that hell and leading me to your channel. Thank you for your Christian and personal perspective. I appreciate you and your work very much.
After a 5 year engagement to a narcissist, i really never knew him, let alone his Childhood. When I left him, he went bar-hopping and met a RICH woman who he married 2 weeks later. He married her Bank Acct. I have no idea where he is today. I changed my phone #, i got off fb, and i moved. He never found me.
@@JavManTube Just Remember the devil wanted to be god and he and 1/3 of the angels got thrown out of heaven. Get Saved my friend before you end up where the devil will be in eternity. GOD IS LOVE!!! 🙌❤️ Proverbs 3:5-6 KJV
"Sleep with who you want but don't let me find out about it" was the worst thing I could have said ..but this is how desperate things become....nothing you say will deter her from doing anything and they don't care either way. ✝️✝️✝️✝️✝️🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
As soon as I figured her out, I informed her I was going to take over the finances. I was finally going to set a boundary I should have set decades earlier...... Then she filed for divorce. She rushed to the end of the discard.... I was actually relieved.
Dave you ARE a big time preacher, maybe better. Dont understate the sane healing value you bring to this precious recovering community, especially with your anointed Christian perspective…which is rare. Thank you 🙌🏻
Exactly what happened to me. God woke me up at 2 am and told me to check her phone. All the sick and sordid evidence was there. I was able to get rid of her before she was able to discard me. All the glory to God!
After 4 years my Narc came back around. I am healed and have been since 6 months after the escape as I had been doing the work for 2 years prior to leaving. However, I found myself feeling sorry for him and I’ve come back to these videos to remind me who he is. I have changed so much Praise God. He has not changed a lick except gotten older. I have been single, working on my life and the happiest I have been ever! Thank you Dave. Keep doing what you’re doing. God Bless you 🤗
Great episode, Dave. I thought of you and our group the other night. I heard a Barbara Mandrell song from 1983 called "One of a Kind, Pair of Fools" where the lyrics show she as the wife who had been cheated on, confronts and collaborates with the "new supply" about her husband who had been cheating on both of them. I've heard that song for 40 years, and that was the first time I understood the lyrics! (Thanks to the education from this group and your knowledgeable tutelage in the subject) Thanks for some good moments in our walk down memory lane. God bless you Dave and your ministry.
It was 21 years for me before I found out what narcissists were thanks to your videos and others!!! Unfortunately it took 21 years together and 20 of those 21 years to find out who he really is he walked, I filed and then got mad bc I filed lol…..make that make sense🙄🙄🙄🙄so insane I guess I beat him to the punch, 2 years into the divorce and finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel bc he’s been lying and delaying things
I married my ex after only 2 years together. I thought I knew everything about her after only a couple of dates. Fell for all the bull. Finally had the courage to divorce her after 17 years. I’ve moved on and I’ve been with a wonderful person now for 4 years , however I realize and understand that I still have a lot to learn about my girlfriend and taking my time.
This video saved me. I cant even describe how i was treated by my exgf who i finally dumped 2 months ago. If you had a relationship with a narc you know. Zero empathy. Zero accountability. I dont blame her i blame myself i knew she was evil and i allowed it. 😢
Love this video because every single thing you are saying here is right on Dave!! So relatable to me in my situation with my X. Just so grateful to have found this channel which helped me right out of my deepest depression during and after my divorce from a Narc. Thank you Dave for all your knowledge on this and God and you do make a difference.
Mine I kicked out. Last March , December 12 was our 5 year anniversary, he lives 6 door's down from my house. He's become addicted to social media trash, multiple emails multiple profiles multiple phone numbers, he's blocked me from all his social media trash since the first year, he wont touch me, hes Hoovering me right now, he can see my porch from his apartment windows
Your a 1000% right with everything you said, I wished I could "HEART❤" you a million trillions 😍 you've described my ex narcissist down to a "T" thank you for your wisdom and knowledge and experience because you help us so much thank you 🤗🙏💖
I went through this post divorce. Met a girl and I wasn't that attracted but bored and got roped into this thing. Fell in love and the games began. Folks, I was so depressed and in an extremely bad mental state. I know what you go through but let me tell you.... once you realize what they are, the joke is on them. Get over it and move on. Smile you got out. I'm 3 years out and it's the best. I would never go near that girl. She tried to come back once and I said listen I'm just not attracted to you. I wish you the best… I'm not mad about anything it all boils down to me, not being attracted to you… If you say that… They will never bother you again… They will be embarrassed that you're not attracted to them I promise you nobody wants to convince someone to date them if they feel the other person isn't attracted to them… If you don't wanna do that… Just remember you've tried everything else…
It will take some time and in your own time you will heal. Going no contact is the way to get your own strength back. Self care and being grateful for your life and without a doubt pray! Pray whenever you have something to pray about. Pray when you wake up and before exiting your bed. When you realize you have survived something that was meant to take you down the cognitive dissonance is gone. I’m really enjoying this channel and I pray everyone get a the message and goes no contact! Jesus Christ did the work, it’s finished. All that is left for us to do is have faith in Him. Period.
Happy Friday Everyboby!!!! Love You!!!!
Happy Friday to you too! 🌺 🌸 🌺
TGIF Dave 🙂
The battle with Narcs only brought me closer to God, thank you! May God bless you, brother.
Likewise sweetheart ❤
I don't hate I don't trust.
What’s more important is that you realize that you’ll never go back to the narcissist.
🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Amen
Amen.
Takes learning
.
The narcissist wants to know everything about your past relationships but doesn't want to tell you about there past
YOU KNOW THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WHEN THEY TRY TO KEEP TOO MANY SECRETS.
Knowing someone's past is important. You don't have to dive too deep .. but if they were promiscuous before you. That's something you need to know.
The narc is lying about their past. It's always told in a way to make you jealous or insecure.
Just when I thought I was free of narcissists because I had gained discernment, my son's girlfriend dumped him by leaving a note on the door and texting ME to tell me to give it to him. I sat down with the two of them (they are teens) and during the course of a discussion, I asked her several questions to gauge her empathy. Her answers indicated that she doesn't have any. So now my poor boy has experienced his first narcissistic discard and devaluation. I hope it will be his last. Guys, they are everywhere.
How long were they dating
heck no it's just beginning. but he will be strong and resilient. it's such an advantage honestly. he's beyond lucky to have a good dad like you and this future advancement
they really are.
Thank you. I try to teach him what I have learned. They were together for 15 months.
@@mickcrovo5238lots of strength to both of you 🫶
I started studying Narcissism 7 years ago. It only took 2 weeks to figure out He was a narcissist. I quickly got away. I dated him 3 months and left him. I moved and made myself unavailable to him . He had no idea as to where i was. I deleted all social media and changed my phone number. I ran into him a year later and of course, he hoovered, but nothing worked. Best move i ever made!! I'm still educating myself today! A narcissistic relationship is the most horrific thing anybody can get involved in. Run! People and never look back. I never thought those kind of people existed in this world!!
Get Away!!❤
AS YOU SLOWLY GET TO KNOW NEW PEOPLE,STEP BACK OBSERVE AND WRITE DOWN THEIR BEHAVIORS.
Narcissists are disappointing, it's like going to your moms house to make a crispy buttery grilled cheese sandwich then opening the butter container to find old baked beans 😮
Great analog. They are users and abusers and they us to have nothing, last narc actually said that i have never had nothing.
😂
Happy Friday to everyone! God takes people out of your life because he's heard conversations that you haven't heard.
New one, thx 😊
Oh my Goodness i Love that❤❤
@lisamooney6297 That is so true! Thank You for bringing that fact to light, Lisa!
Yes, true. God knows the inner soul of everyone. He knows the evil plans ahead and helps us avoid them.
Recently, my son while working out at his local gym, was approached by 2 gym members who asked him, "Are you a Christian?"
My son answered, "Yes", but was surprised by the two guys' question and asked them why they asked that.
They said, they have noticed him over time at the gym and see how he treats others.
My son is a bodybuilder and gym members are constantly asking him stuff how they can improve their workouts, etc. members appreciate his expertise and taking time to help them.
The 2 guys told my son, they thought he's a Christian because it shows in his face.
My son was surprised by their answer and appreciated it.
I told my son, yes, true Christianity shines through a person, it can be felt. One doesn't need to proclaim they're one and they don't need to prominently display a cross.
Being a Christian carries a responsibility in following Christ in how we live and love others.
God designed my Discard and holds my hand . 19 months No Contact. I am no longer a Carnal Christian. I have the knowledge at 56 years of age and know now I was brought up in a family of Narcissists. We thrivers need to give ourselves Grace with all the abuse and trauma we’ve been through. I am back in church and doing small group Bible study. My life has been difficult, but God sees me and has always been with me. I wait for His timing now. I submit to His Will. Thank you Dave. You and Paula from Narc Con are the best.
Amen. You are Blessed!
Very Well Said !! 💯
I feel like a different person now my energy is back thank God
“You start to hate mankind… You start to hate people!”So true dave! I am a registered nurse and I absolutely love people and have always felt pretty jovial and enjoy conversation with my patients. 4 1/2 years in I begin feeling so impatient with my patients and my children, and really only felt good when things were going ”well”, with the narc. All I could do was desire to get out of my patient room and get back to my computer, which is completely 100% unlike myself. I am now 10 months exactly no contact and I am feeling myself enjoying my job again, although there are still days, I greive, I am feeling myself laughing again, and enjoying the personalities of my patients and my friends and family! Thank you so much for your videos… They have literally saved me! Praise God, he is so good!
We are in the end times and the elite that control this realm are creating or bringing out narcissists in there droves social media has a lot to do with it but people are being told they have one life ! Live your best life this creates greed and hate out of people believing there’s nothing else after death it’s disgraceful
Yes, it is true, i had same feeling. Yes, they turn us slowly to negativity, it is awful, so vile "people".
I understand the grief you experience from time to time because it's not what you planned, but then I remember that I'm Free, 🎉 to share my life and my time with Jesus 🙏😂
I thank God He made a way for me to get out ,I won't ever give that narcissist a chance to get close to me again ever.
I escaped, and I’ll never look back 🙏🏻 now I get to experience the good that truly is around me
Did it take a long time
That's exactly what happened to me! For me, he's the most beautiful man in the world on the outside and demonic on the inside...
The narcissist pretends that there caring and loving during the LoveBomb after the LoveBomb they argue one second they love you the next and they try to get you to question your reality in every conversation
Phone number change = PEACE.
The Blood of Jesus! It was the Blood of Jesus that keeps me from the evil narcissists.
The night I met him I was due to be at choir rehearsal, but I ditched it, and that took me into 22 years of mayhem with this narcissist. I finally left one night while we both were supposed to be at work I moved out into my own placeand I haven’t looked back thank God
My energy is mine My soul is God's
Boom!
Amen
The devil goes after the creme of the crop..those that have a purpose and a mission for God, the devil wants to destroy that person but the victory belongs to Jesus!!! Dave thank you for your amazing, Holy Spirit filled videos!
Terrible stress/fear of being left in desperate situations without means. It happened repeatedly. Sleepless nights....days without food...walking on eggshells...chest pain...terrible abdominal pain...on and on it goes.
Go get a job…pray to GOD to take away your pain - because when you do - it actually happens immediately! And then you pray to GOD to give you the MAN you’re supposed to be with- and HE WILL. BLOCK THIS PERSON WHO’s destroying your soul. He’s joy is to see you this hurt- don’t give it to him. - NOW walk on top of him…FOREVER.
The aging covert Narc pretended to be like he wasn't aging, never admitting to not being able to hear as well or even his vision getting bad. The ugly ones will waste way more of your time, sadly. thanks Dave!
Haha it’s true. My covert narc is fat, ugly 63 y.o guy. He was not happy whenever i told him he is old now
They are Master Liars!
Not good at it after u catch on
LIARS, THIEVES, AND DESTROYERS.
These comments are disturbing; I’m so glad I decided to stay single… Dealt with the Malignant one time and 4 Covert, I’m sticking with God. He has been the only one who has ever added value to my life!!
❤❤❤
Looking back i was too trusting......he appeared to be so interested at the start but it was like you said......they were collecting inventory to be used at a future date......i was making excuses for poor behaviour all the time, hoping he would change. But he never did. When i finally figured him out, he threw me away and our family like we were trash. 30 + years of being married meant nothing to him. God removed me from this nightmare last year, hurt and broken but HE has filled the void with his love and I'm healing. Thank you Dave. You're right God gave me dreams about him and he was caught messaging other women and planning to meet up.
I told him I was never coming back. Who needs such rotten treatment. I knew he could find another. Don't care..
They best is when they try to recreate you, the life you provided, and even cook the foods you used to but fail at it. They even have the new supply recreating the home you gave her, try to convince themselves he’s just like you, and even have the new suplly dress like you. My kids always come home and say how mom tried to cook something like you and it was gross. Thank God for this, and other channels, guiding us towards healing and we can chuckle at their attempts to recreate what they threw away.
she wanted to piece it together, have our attributes with individuals, but seems she can't find the undying love i gave her freely
For the first time I changed my number, closed all social media, and am moving. YESS IM FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
There's burned bridges and then there's bridges nuked from orbit.
It's the only way to be sure.
THEY STILL WILL TRY TO HOOVER
@@treelover1050 Even when you left Hoover so they can get you back and hurt you worse 😭😭😭😞
After wrenching free, I have Zero empathy for these weasels. They cannot get any more of my energy. They stole enough time, money, and genuine love.
Thank you for your healing clarity!
I have not gotten a hoover phone call yet to my understanding maybe I did but I did not pick up the phone for numbers I don't know. But in January 2024 the 4th yes I don't forget the discard date one of the days the transformed my life will mark 2 year's since being discarded. Ok to business. I believe that how you were discarded the level of damage done is the longer the narcissist waits to try to come back to you. The narcissist is not stupid they know what they done. If minimal damage has been done the narc will try to return to you quicker. If they just dropped a warhead missile on a person it may take about 5 to 10 years for the dust to settle and that's when you may hear from them. The trick is they want you to believe they changed. They have not! They only changed supply! Let's not be deceived any longer, the pain they have caused too me and you do you really want to go through that again? Let's move on God removed these people for a reason out our lives he's got something better for us! Let's do our part and stay strong and believe in his promises. 🙏🏾💪🏾❤️
In the 5 years we were together he had opened up 3 times. The first time he told me he was bullied as a child. The other 2 times he was crying but I couldn’t make sense of what he was saying but we were hugging. He stopped opening up- there were no more heart to heart conversations.
I took my narcissist ex back not knowing what narcissism was when he came back he got so petty he must have been throwing out my clothes hair ties 😒 you are so confused you think you misplaced something all along they just didn't want you to have anything you enjoyed when you really are gone they regret the things they didn't get to hurt you by.. ty🌹
My goodness, he recruited help to mess with the house and my stuff specifically. I feel you ❤
@@PanelsWainio I gave up my apartment moved with him. First argument he an his friend threw my things all over the driveway I got another apartment now . Glad I'm free
@@PanelsWainio they are so cruel. Hope your doing ok
An ex-narc called me over to him at a party we were both attending and when I approached him, he threw a drink in my face in front of everyone. I punched him in his jaw so hard in front of everyone, and then poised myself and walked away with my head held high. The look on his face due to the stares and whispers he received was Epic! He wanted to put on a show and I gave him one😏
Scary how easily disposable people are to them.
They come into your life like a steam roller, with too many secrets . Eventually, some come to light
The more I accept my mistakes accept my past shame and mistakes and sins I've come to really find out that I'm much more stronger then everyone who failed at Tearing Me Down my whole life. Life's a journey I intend I'm not wasting the remainder of my journey God bless you cheers
🙏
Dave, your videos are SO reassuring to victims of narcissistic abuse because of your godly perspective on narcissism and because your knowledge and understanding of this spirit is so exacting! I certainly appreciate you and may God bless you in Jesus name!
Amen!
Indeed. It's a form of closure for me that I'll never get from him
They Withhold Affection/ They Are All the Same!
Same Playbook!
Thanks Dave! Keep it up
They withhold everything that's near and dear to your heart. The list is made during the love bomb, they're working hard at that time. It's only during the discard phase that you'll see any more energy/effort from them , at that point it's demonic and it's directed at you. The account of pain they attempt to cause you, is commensurate to the amount of love bomb intensity that they provided.
How is it that they all operate from the same playbook? How is that even possible?
Yes across the world
Because it is the same evil jezebel spirit operating in all of them.
"Sell You Down the River".......classic
Never doubt Dave You make a difference!!!!! My mother and one of my sisters are malignant narcissists.... Of course I didn't know it at the time...but I knew something wasn't right with both of them. Knowledge is power Dave. I thank you every day for making me aware of this nasty mental illness. I am an ampath and they can't stand it. I went no contact with my sister and I feel 100 percent better and happy. They effect your physical and mental health. Now I am free. My Mom passed 20 years ago......without a word of apology about the emotional...psychological abuse she inflicted on me as a child growing up.....and until her death. Thanks again Dave. I am so happy you found a truly good woman and that you are happy. You deserve it man!!!!
Thanks! God Bless You!
Thank you.....God bless you also Dave......I know there is a special place in heaven for you.
I totally agree with you! Dave has helped so many and speaks a timely, God centered message!!!!’
I promise you Dave - if my ex sat down and watched your video today he’d burst 💥 into flames 🔥. Dead on interpretation 😮
Spontaneous Narcissistic Combustion! 💥💥 Al-a-kablam! 🔥🔥
You said it best, Dave!
They are cowards.
They have no honor.
True. All their feelings are for them and their needs only and plan to use you to get that for them only.
Your voice is very soothing and heavenly.
Thanks!
I agree 🎉 very Bill Kurtis tonality
They say their childhood was fine. Once again lying
I don't usually write comments, but here's to hoping this will feel a bit therapeutic or enlighten someone else... In the beginning, I didn't want to listen to my gut because I like to give people the benefit of the doubt (word of advice, don't do that. Allow people to prove themselves through their actions and behavior. Look at how they treated their previous serious relationships). Three traumatic years later, here I am feeling so foolish for not listening to my gut instinct and for not applying what I knew about covert narcissists and narcissists in general. Man guys.. I really, really loved him.. but even that starts to feel confusing after some time because you find yourself seeing another side to this person that you don't even recognize and you start to feel alone because you only sometimes get to see those glimpses of who he "pretends" to be and maybe that's who I fell in love with. That's the "person" I stuck around for. Then I'd get berated for pointing out the discrepancies in his behavior/personality and my love would get questioned because he'd imply that I must not "love "all" of him then but only the "good parts" of him. That pushed me into wanting to prove my love more and more; even during the ugly times which slowly and gradually led me to become subservient. Before I knew it, I was constantly apologizing for the smallest of things because I just got so burnt out from arguing with him all the time. He was so nit-picky about everything; especially the things from my past- even though I'm pretty much an open book- to a fault, Doesn't matter though. If you overlook ONE detail from 5 or maybe even 10 years ago, he'll question eeeeeverything about you; even though you've remained pretty consistent in your present relationship otherwise. These people have extreme trust issues, so one oversight or mistake and you're not their lover anymore, you're a suspect. Also, pay attention to the patterns. They're there. I don't even know if HE realized it to be honest. I wasn't even LOOKING for them, but eventually something started to eat at me. I subconsciously felt something was off or maybe even felt.. familiar. As if I've seen this before. I don't think narcissists consciously do that. I tried to point it out to him because I loved him and I wanted us to become better people together, but of course that just pissed him off even more because he'd deflect and get defensive and say I was "invalidating his feelings." Watch out for that; especially the ones already familiar with psychology. They'll use it against you. I got to the point at the end of our relationship where I just couldn't un-see the patterns. I could literally predict when he would be in a mood (sometimes when I was sick or if things didn't go his way, or if I was happy in the company of other people. Hell, if they find out you're having a better day than they are, they'll strike with something from either 5 years ago or maybe even the way your tone was last week when you were talking about such and such. It never fails. They'll always find something to be bothered about and I honestly just couldn't be bothered anymore. I was so burnt out that I became indifferent. He used my indifference against me saying I was acting suspicious and acting like a "b****" or that I reminded him of his ex. That was enough for me to walk away. Trust me, the understanding and empathetic part of me could have kept fighting for the relationship, but once my boundaries were constantly being crossed and the name calling continued any time I was becoming frustrated and assertive, I'm out.
They also very disrespectful and I don't do that bye
Brutal , soul murderers I was a widow , and he appeared ! I feel your pain I’ve experienced a second death mainly my own . Everything you just wrote I went through . But I’m gonna make it ! Molly Ringwald (they didn’t Brake me) ! Physician heal thyself.❤
i thought a decent person was easy to come by. i was a great person and the narcs had a mask on to seem great. i was duped. it’s not my fault. i was 16 when i met my first narc. then another one right after that. 7 years of constant torment. i’m so glad to be safe now and healing still.
I was young living in the flesh because I had such low low self esteem. I got married due to guilt of well I was already with this one and I didn’t want a “high body count” i felt sick to get married but I felt bad for his immigration status. My God is freeing me now. Lord help me.
Happy Friday to you too.
He was controlling and behaved like a child at times.
I gave him a few months to prove himself, but when the name calling happened I knew something wasn't adding up with this guy.
I began to feel unhappy and felt insecurity around him.
Then I found your channel and then I began to change towards him. He realised the change and avoided to see him.
I had to tell him I met someone to get rid of him.
Thankyou Dave, I am free from that loser.😅😅😅😅
He acts as child around you , others he's fake
At the discard I was CONSTANTLY referred to as a “stupid beoth”. I kept thinking of all the things to call me? Why? Stupid?!? I am highly educated with many accomplishments but stupid is not how anyone would describe me. Now I realize why he kept saying that- because I had the veil on my eyes and didn’t use discernment to SEE who he was because I loved him. All the while he was getting away with all kinds of debauchery, theft, cheating you name it. The joke was on me. So grateful to be out of that.
"trying to please this person, who actually hates you."
That one hit pretty hard.
My Narcissistic husband, while obviously hating me, would stand around mostly naked, and still try to touch me. It was absolutely degrading. I asked him..."are you in the habit of sleeping with people you hate?"
Apparently they are.
“Trying to please this person who actually hates you” Yep. That is it.
I watch your videos several times a day. It’s been 4months since I kicked him out. I packed all his belongings and placed them outside the apartment. I had no clue why his behavior had shift. I got in contact with his ex and asked her questions and she had all the answers. She said he’s a narcissist and send me a link to your video now I am Mrs. A. Thank you for your service
I just left my boyfriend after 4 years. He was the most calculated discrete narcissist I have ever met. It took me 4 years to see his true colors. I lost friends, pushed family away and began to make excuses for his behavior. I lost myself and it took me finding out that he was talking to someone else behind my back to leave. I ignored the plethora of red flags for the sake of “love”. I truly pray for anyone who is bound to a person with this disorder. I also pray for anyone who has NPD and that they find God. Thanks for your help!
Current gf dealing with that right now. Never even dated him but he thinks they need to have children and marry. Dude was gonna leave his wife for her until I stepped in. Now his wife knows and he's without a spouse or a woman. Wasn't what I wanted to do but he was relentless I had no choice.
I was in the marriage for 33 years 25 was Hell. I thank God for getting me out. So much I could tell so much . Jeff
My narcissist always talked about himself, his childhood, his many relationships.
Yep..glad to be over the whole nightmare...am a better person from the experience.. everything else is easy now
You are making a difference. Don’t stop. I think you for all you do. God bless.
Incredibly accurate; I recently found out that my ex narc did know of me before I knew about him; I was lucky, received epiphany and it's been 8 months of healing ❤ great video, thank you!
It feel like order #66 has been activated...Narcs seem to be lossin it, it is time to abandon these empty vessels...Thank you so much, Dave...Love u too =-)
This message is all true great message praise the lord Jesus blessed by this message praying 🙏
Afte being discarded I was anxious,stressed,avoided people,I hated men generally and feared to interact with people
Dearest brother in Christ Jesus, thank you for your stewardship unto the Father, His children~ His kingdom . . .
You are a blessing and inspiration to mankind, truly! . . .
I am truly honored to have been led by the Holy Spirit to your knowledge understanding truth discernment and wisdom, as I have learned the intricacies of this end times plague upon this dying world, that we must endure to the end in faith and righteousness in overcoming all things, as we gain the promise of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, to know the truth in all things, as we live in the Atonement of His love for us in DOing His Fathers will upon all of His precious children . . .
Thank you Dave, may His love and peace continually strengthen your beautiful heart, 😊 this day and forever I pray in the holy name of Jehovah . . . Amen.
Same to you, Amen!
Oh boy did I have dreams! Nightmares n warnings..God is so good to speak to me that way.
This narcissist I know act like they can’t do no wrong. I had to block this guy. You listed them right on point, and I need peace ✌🏾
the flowing sound gets me every video
Omg yesss. A new relationship I had recently was worming his way into my apartment. I broke it off. It was like what? I never asked you to move in here.
Jesus delivered me from the worst narc ever(the man that opened my eyes to this devilish world of naricissim.) after 3 and a half years. Tho, I will never be the same, and it took me years to recover. I am grateful to God for delivering me from that hell and leading me to your channel. Thank you for your Christian and personal perspective. I appreciate you and your work very much.
He studied me For years and watched me do all the nice things for his friend! 😅
After a 5 year engagement to a narcissist, i really never knew him, let alone his Childhood. When I left him, he went bar-hopping and met a RICH woman who he married 2 weeks later. He married her Bank Acct. I have no idea where he is today. I changed my phone #, i got off fb, and i moved. He never found me.
Sounds like he won 😂
AMEN!!! All The Glory to GOD!!!!!🙌❤️🤗
Speaking Truth, Dave
Ty🩵
@@JavManTube Just Remember the devil wanted to be god and he and 1/3 of the angels got thrown out of heaven.
Get Saved my friend before you end up where the devil will be in eternity.
GOD IS LOVE!!! 🙌❤️
Proverbs 3:5-6 KJV
"Sleep with who you want but don't let me find out about it" was the worst thing I could have said ..but this is how desperate things become....nothing you say will deter her from doing anything and they don't care either way.
✝️✝️✝️✝️✝️🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
I said this too 😥
As soon as I figured her out, I informed her I was going to take over the finances. I was finally going to set a boundary I should have set decades earlier......
Then she filed for divorce. She rushed to the end of the discard....
I was actually relieved.
They HATE BEING STOPPED IN THEIR TRACKS OF ABUSE- GOOD JOB 💯
I’m glad you are talking about this. As a Christian I totally get this, but thank God for discernment.
That was a super good pour dave … Fantastic !!!
YES. I CAN ACTUALLY SMELL THE COFFEE. NICE SOUND TOO..
Dave you ARE a big time preacher, maybe better. Dont understate the sane healing value you bring to this precious recovering community, especially with your anointed Christian perspective…which is rare. Thank you 🙌🏻
good lookin, and a college degree?!
MARRY ME IMMEDIATELY LADY 🤣
I confronted the cheating...that was the end..rage ensued. I am now a free bird. In retrospect this was all spiritual. God saved me from a nightmare.
*Like the cowards that we are*- the perfect, complete description of Narcissists.
Dave you have made all the difference in the world for me getting rid of my narc!!! Ty and praise Jesus for you ❤❤
Exactly what happened to me. God woke me up at 2 am and told me to check her phone. All the sick and sordid evidence was there. I was able to get rid of her before she was able to discard me. All the glory to God!
I'm Catholic Dave, but when you speak it's so spiritual and eloquent more than what I hear in Mass on Sunday
After 4 years my Narc came back around. I am healed and have been since 6 months after the escape as I had been doing the work for 2 years prior to leaving. However, I found myself feeling sorry for him and I’ve come back to these videos to remind me who he is. I have changed so much Praise God. He has not changed a lick except gotten older. I have been single, working on my life and the happiest I have been ever! Thank you Dave. Keep doing what you’re doing. God Bless you 🤗
Great episode, Dave. I thought of you and our group the other night. I heard a Barbara Mandrell song from 1983 called "One of a Kind, Pair of Fools" where the lyrics show she as the wife who had been cheated on, confronts and collaborates with the "new supply" about her husband who had been cheating on both of them.
I've heard that song for 40 years, and that was the first time I understood the lyrics! (Thanks to the education from this group and your knowledgeable tutelage in the subject)
Thanks for some good moments in our walk down memory lane. God bless you Dave and your ministry.
I love Barbra Mandrell 😅 I Was Country When Country Wasn’t Cool 😎😂 I’m still country 🙏 still not cool though 😂🔥💯
Ohio isn’t so country but I try 🥺🙌🏻🩵
It was 21 years for me before I found out what narcissists were thanks to your videos and others!!! Unfortunately it took 21 years together and 20 of those 21 years to find out who he really is he walked, I filed and then got mad bc I filed lol…..make that make sense🙄🙄🙄🙄so insane I guess I beat him to the punch, 2 years into the divorce and finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel bc he’s been lying and delaying things
Me too my precious time and energy waisted on absolutely nothing that's the hardest part of it all...
I love how you talk about the Lord! When you talked about the blood of Jesus I felt the Holy Spirit so strong. Thank you brother!
"Machine-gunning" questions, without genuine sharing, back and forth, is not communication.
This message is very clear. I know these things myself. Hold Fast. Its going to be okay.
I married my ex after only 2 years together. I thought I knew everything about her after only a couple of dates. Fell for all the bull. Finally had the courage to divorce her after 17 years. I’ve moved on and I’ve been with a wonderful person now for 4 years , however I realize and understand that I still have a lot to learn about my girlfriend and taking my time.
I hope he does let it sink in I'M NOT COMING BACK EVER.
The devaluation stage is horrible everything is a argument and a debate there against everything you do and say and there indifferent to everything
This video saved me. I cant even describe how i was treated by my exgf who i finally dumped 2 months ago. If you had a relationship with a narc you know. Zero empathy. Zero accountability. I dont blame her i blame myself i knew she was evil and i allowed it. 😢
Love this video because every single thing you are saying here is right on Dave!! So relatable to me in my situation with my X. Just so grateful to have found this channel which helped me right out of my deepest depression during and after my divorce from a Narc. Thank you Dave for all your knowledge on this and God and you do make a difference.
I’m already at the point of never reconciling but if another man was in the mix I wouldn’t even want her memory
Thanks! Cheers 🥂 God bless your heart 💜
Thank you! Cheers!
Mine I kicked out. Last March , December 12 was our 5 year anniversary, he lives 6 door's down from my house. He's become addicted to social media trash, multiple emails multiple profiles multiple phone numbers, he's blocked me from all his social media trash since the first year, he wont touch me, hes Hoovering me right now, he can see my porch from his apartment windows
Your a 1000% right with everything you said, I wished I could "HEART❤" you a million trillions 😍 you've described my ex narcissist down to a "T" thank you for your wisdom and knowledge and experience because you help us so much thank you 🤗🙏💖
🤗
I went through this post divorce. Met a girl and I wasn't that attracted but bored and got roped into this thing. Fell in love and the games began.
Folks, I was so depressed and in an extremely bad mental state. I know what you go through but let me tell you.... once you realize what they are, the joke is on them. Get over it and move on. Smile you got out. I'm 3 years out and it's the best. I would never go near that girl.
She tried to come back once and I said listen I'm just not attracted to you. I wish you the best… I'm not mad about anything it all boils down to me, not being attracted to you…
If you say that… They will never bother you again… They will be embarrassed that you're not attracted to them I promise you nobody wants to convince someone to date them if they feel the other person isn't attracted to them… If you don't wanna do that… Just remember you've tried everything else…
It will take some time and in your own time you will heal. Going no contact is the way to get your own strength back. Self care and being grateful for your life and without a doubt pray! Pray whenever you have something to pray about. Pray when you wake up and before exiting your bed. When you realize you have survived something that was meant to take you down the cognitive dissonance is gone. I’m really enjoying this channel and I pray everyone get a the message and goes no contact! Jesus Christ did the work, it’s finished. All that is left for us to do is have faith in Him. Period.
wow this is SO accurate ❤
I agree with this video.😢