I Never Ever Thought I Would Tell This Story, So Emotional

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  • Опубликовано: 27 дек 2024

Комментарии • 301

  • @bukelwamlanjana4666
    @bukelwamlanjana4666 2 года назад +145

    your father did not love your mother, he wouldn't be doing this to her children if he did. God is the father to the fatherless. what a privilege that is

  • @crazybeautifullens
    @crazybeautifullens 2 года назад +101

    Oh Owamie! I totally understand what you’re talking about.
    My father is such a narcissistic toxic father. The trauma he put my mom, sister & I in the 20 years that my parents were married is indescribable. Thankfully my mom divorced him 15 years ago & by the time my mom passed away earlier this year, she had been able to rebuild her life in the 15 years she was divorced to him.
    Unfortunately for me, even after my mom divorced my father & even after all the trauma he put us through, I STILL gave him chances he never deserved. I forgave apologies that I never received. I gave him so many chances in hope that he would change. In hope that he would finally BE an actual father. In a way I was also “begging” for an authentic relationship with him. I lived in great delusion because of this! UNTIL two years ago I had to start facing the REALITY of who my father is (and has always been) instead of the DELUSION of who I wished he was! I finally CUT HIM OUT OF MY LIFE & for the very first time in my life I am at peace. I am finally healing from trauma, finding my self worth etc. all my life I had dealt with anxiety to the point that I had to be prescribed anti-anxiety medication. I also had chronic insomnia and had to be prescribed sleeping pills just so I could fall asleep. I also had diagnosed depression & had to go on anti/depressants at some point in my life. Many people in my life (except those that were close to me at the time) didn’t know all of this because I was very “high functioning” - successful & a high achiever!
    But since cutting my father out of my life - because I realized that he was the source of all these medical ills since he was the source of all my trauma - I was finally weaned from all those medications. For the first time in my life I can sleep naturally without the need of sleeping pills or anti-anxiety medication. I haven’t been dealing with chronic depression either. My narcissistic father truly was toxic for me - in every possible way. Cutting him out of my life was the BEST thing I could do for myself. I am two years narcissist-free and I couldn’t be happier.
    I’m happy you share your journey Owamie as it encourages me to share my stories too. A lot is alway spoken about toxic fathers who disappear from a child’s life from before they are born. But little is spoken about toxic fathers who are IN the child’s life but their very PRESENCE is harmful. Sometimes I would wish that I didn’t know who my father was because knowing him was too much trauma. At one point I thought of even changing my surname to my mothers name because I HATED EVERY PART OF MY FATHER & wanted nothing to do with him. If I could even extract parts of my DNA that were from him I would have paid for that procedure because that’s how much I hated him & was angry at him. But after the healing journey I realized that hatred would get me nowhere. Also I’m Zulu (not white lol) & changing my surname has much more deeper significance which is bigger than him. Also I realized even if I changed my surname, took out his DNA from my body (if that were possible of course) it wouldn’t erase the pain & trauma he caused. I realized that the answer in my healing and moving forward was to first cut him out of my life, and then to confront the trauma & pain so that I can finally heal from it and move on.
    & the pain of being alone is real. However it doesn’t mean you have to keep a toxic person in your life because of it. Because that does more harm than good.
    All the strength and prayers to you Owamie and your sisters. God will continue to see you through ❤

    • @Mabsknows
      @Mabsknows 2 года назад +4

      Thank you for sharing. It’s so helpful to hear the side of the child. This is what most mothers are afraid of and why they keep toxic baby daddies away from their kids. But people will always just preach about the rights of the father to access the child. These men do so much harm. I’m so glad you are healing ❤️‍🩹

    • @The_Flower_Enhle
      @The_Flower_Enhle 2 года назад +1

      Im really sorry about what you went through💓

    • @The_Flower_Enhle
      @The_Flower_Enhle 2 года назад +1

      Im really sorry about what you went through💓

    • @beewest5704
      @beewest5704 2 года назад +1

      You are on the path of thriving instead of just surviving. At the end of the day radically excepting ppl even our parents for who they are & putting up boundaries even if that means cutting them out of our lives is what needs to be done.

    • @nzimadmz7131
      @nzimadmz7131 2 года назад +2

      You took a great decision to cut him off and focus on you. Ey, sorry 😭

  • @mavisnkwinika9335
    @mavisnkwinika9335 2 года назад +27

    I think kindly also when you able to save money, build a home for you and your siblings, even if it is small. If God forbid you leave this world your siblings will suffer

  • @Trymond
    @Trymond 2 года назад +59

    MENTAL HEALTH CHECK INS ARE SO IMPORTANT. Big ups to you for being aware and vulnerable. KuROUGH. MOTHER'S DEATHS JUST HIT DIFFERENTLY NJE💔

  • @nomondefalasi4533
    @nomondefalasi4533 2 года назад +44

    Morning Queen Ninja,you know my elder sister once found me busy filling some forms from work and I put both my Son's as only beneficiaries to what I was busy filling,so she asked me why is it only my Son's she dsnt see my husband name. I told her that everything that belongs to me even Life Policy both my Son's are the beneficiaries because I need them to be covered incase anything happens to me. My husband will have to forgive me on this one because he might wanna get married again and I will rest in peace knowing my kids have a Shelter that I left for them and cash to start up their lives

    • @ChroniclesOfANamibianGirlChild
      @ChroniclesOfANamibianGirlChild 2 года назад +2

      I hope you are not married in community of property.

    • @nomondefalasi4533
      @nomondefalasi4533 2 года назад +1

      Nope I'm not reason ,when I met him I had already bought a property that I'm renting it out and one of my Parents house they left it on my name so I could not take any chances not that I would say we will divorce or anything but you can never know the future and besides he already had triplets with his late wife so incase God calls him back I don't wanna find myself or kids when I'm not around being in nasty Court battles with my in-laws. This new house we just build we both paid for it so we busy preparing with the Lawyers to have a joint Will. I also did not have a problem when we were planning to get married that he would like us to start fresh and don't stay in his late wife home because his sister and his kids are staying there so I was okay we bought a land while we were renting and saved money then after 5 years we build our home

    • @ChroniclesOfANamibianGirlChild
      @ChroniclesOfANamibianGirlChild 2 года назад

      @@nomondefalasi4533 power to you queen. ❤️

    • @ChroniclesOfANamibianGirlChild
      @ChroniclesOfANamibianGirlChild 2 года назад

      @@nomondefalasi4533 power to you queen. ❤️

  • @mahlatsehlatse449
    @mahlatsehlatse449 2 года назад +10

    The number of people who relate to this 😭May our children never suffer from what we have suffered. May women have the courage to leave toxic setups for their sake and that of the children.

  • @leratogao2267
    @leratogao2267 2 года назад +13

    Your story is similar to my ex colleague she used to treat me so bad.. but I always remembered that she had been through a lot her mom died when she was young and her father never wanted anything to do with her, her aunt abused her so she turned into be a covert narcissist.. her anger was because of her family background and it had nothing to do with me.. I wish she also self reflect like you and heal.

  • @anittanxusa
    @anittanxusa 2 года назад +16

    Oh 😥💔 Owamie… I am so sorry. Just watching this breaks my heart. I’m sorry that you have had to carry this pain in your heart and now you are still having to fight for yourself and your sisters. Healing is a journey so it’s okay to go back to therapy❤️🤍 hang in there 🥺🙏🏾

  • @brillianthadebe
    @brillianthadebe 2 года назад +10

    I love how open you are about your pain. You don't understand how many ppl resonate with your story. Sending love and healing ❤

  • @Vuyo777
    @Vuyo777 2 года назад +79

    These kind of scars don't heal, you just learn to live with them. I lost my mom in 2004, at 16years old. It didn't take long for my 2 brothers and I to realize we were on our own. People said and did things that hurt so deeply, family members mostly. Constantly appeasing people just so you had a place to belong was tough. If you still have a loving parent in your life, count yourself blessed.

    • @lulufierce01
      @lulufierce01 2 года назад +1

      ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

    • @kekeopinions5034
      @kekeopinions5034 2 года назад +2

      Yooooh this😱😢😥😭 I know sis exactly what you talking about😓💔

    • @anitatumeka1466
      @anitatumeka1466 2 года назад +3

      All the love and light to you❤️❤️❤️

    • @Vuyo777
      @Vuyo777 2 года назад +10

      Thank you guys ❤. If back then someone had told me life would turn out well for me, I wouldn't have believed them. I must, though, acknowledge that a neighbor, who didn't have to, stepped up and contributed to where I am in life today. She, herself had her own responsibilities and earned a teachers salary.

  • @Tanya_M988
    @Tanya_M988 2 года назад +44

    I can totally relate to this. The sad part is when people judge you thinking you are disrespectful towards your parent but when the reality is there is just sooo much pain and anger that they don't know about.
    God said we must honour our parents and honestly like you said we don't set out to want to fight with them but sometimes it is very difficult to honour them.
    Love and light Queen Ninja ❤️

    • @ntokotom147
      @ntokotom147 2 года назад +2

      The same verse that says parents should be respected says fathers shouldn't provoke their children

    • @Tanya_M988
      @Tanya_M988 2 года назад +1

      @@ntokotom147 I guess I should revisit tha verse. It hurts honestly because you somewhat feel like God won't bless you because you don't honour the father he gave you

  • @naledindlovu976
    @naledindlovu976 2 года назад +4

    I have no words literally, I have no words for Mr N💔😭🥺 love you girl...big hugs and sending you lots of love & light❤️💕❤️💕❤️💕❤️

  • @mantemoruthane8975
    @mantemoruthane8975 2 года назад +55

    It’s Been 20 yes plus since I lost my mom, seeing listening to your story just sent me back to the day she left me 😭😭😭 yoooh my God please be kind to yourself my sister and take it a step at the time you are strong and wise 💕

    • @gracelubisi7440
      @gracelubisi7440 2 года назад +1

      Marked 23 years this year January 😢😢😢. Not having a mother is not easy 💔.

    • @thoesibanda7769
      @thoesibanda7769 2 года назад

      Marks 27 yrs in Dec💔💔

    • @mantemoruthane8975
      @mantemoruthane8975 2 года назад

      @@gracelubisi7440 sending love and comfort 💕💐

    • @mantemoruthane8975
      @mantemoruthane8975 2 года назад

      @@thoesibanda7769 sending love and comfort💐💕

  • @simphiwemabuza3229
    @simphiwemabuza3229 2 года назад +22

    I am so sorry queen ninja 🥺🥺😔. At this point I think an absent father is better than a toxic one. My father has never been present watching this really breaks my heart, ncesi kakhulu 🥺😔

  • @Drip3657
    @Drip3657 2 года назад +11

    The pain of having a father who behaves like a non living thing💔🤦‍♀️😔...I can relate.i thank God for my mom daily.🇧🇼💕.. I'm so happy I managed to contain my emotions watching this,... Im still fighting my way out of depression and taking medication for it..rough childhood, endless life struggles except for love and grace from above keeping me. Love and light to you Sis🕯️🥺🫂. Please make sure that book lands here in BW🇧🇼...so many Ninjas dwn here

  • @mzansigossip9336
    @mzansigossip9336 2 года назад +32

    I totally understand queen. My son is also going through the same with his dad. That he finally decided to cut him off his life.its very painful ninja😢

    • @nzimadmz7131
      @nzimadmz7131 2 года назад

      Ey, hanging around a toxic parent can have lifetime implications. I'm glad your son decided to move away to save his sanity

    • @mzansigossip9336
      @mzansigossip9336 2 года назад

      @@nzimadmz7131 it's heartbreaking hey. And I even talk to my son to make peace with him. But he refused, saying why should he care about someone who dsnt care about him. All i can do at this point is love my son so much that i fill out that void. He just turned 21 this year and doing his final year in varsity, and I've raised him alone since he was 3 years

  • @tebogomokobane8094
    @tebogomokobane8094 2 года назад +3

    I wish i never knew my dad. Like why is his in my life. The most usless guy in the world. So much trauma 😥. Your sisters will one day thank you for being a second mother to them. Its ohk to cry it helps you to let go slowly

  • @nkhen_c357
    @nkhen_c357 2 года назад +14

    It is so important to marry a man/woman who likes you as a person because as people we get involved and marry our enemies.....

  • @viwemahlamvu9040
    @viwemahlamvu9040 2 года назад +16

    Off topic but Wow Owamie your skin looks amazing 😃 hoping for a skin care routine soonest ❤️

  • @lee9068
    @lee9068 2 года назад +5

    To be honest some parents are just toxic, I know and understand your pain, as much it hurts you just let it go, you can't change a grown up man. One thing I have noticed is that these people are hurting us intentionally. I know that pain very well.

  • @1justWannaKnow
    @1justWannaKnow 2 года назад +4

    I lost my mom in 2020 I cannot heal I don't think I ever will. I understand 🙏🏾💕

  • @hyunbinsdimple5803
    @hyunbinsdimple5803 2 года назад +22

    Hey Owamie, I really hope that one day you meet a man, who will be a great husband to you and a wonderful father to your kids. I honestly believe that even though it didn’t happen for you, one day seeing your husband love your children will be both comforting and healing.

  • @thoughtprocess8730
    @thoughtprocess8730 2 года назад +46

    I’m so sorry that you are going through this. Being the eldest and most responsible child is exhausted. My father is alive and is married to my mother and I constantly have to beg him to pay for my minor siblings fees, accommodation etc. My mother does too much and I was working and just chose to replace him financially but I was so drained between that and my manager literally abusing me at work I couldn’t do it and found myself in a recovery center. I lost my job and I’m just tired 😓
    Women please when you get married and have children watch how your husband behaves. How much responsibility does he assume in being a father? Is he hands on? If not don’t have more kids. I don’t have children of my own but I’ve been a parent since I was 8 years old. I’m tired.
    May God give you grace and carry you and your siblings Owami. Please continue to share. Those who can, will watch relate and support

    • @Aseza_Memke
      @Aseza_Memke 2 года назад +2

      Thanks for sharing

    • @mzansialerts2474
      @mzansialerts2474 2 года назад +2

      Kids are one way to make contribute to poverty and thankfully we can chose to not have them. I experienced something similar between a toxic workplace and my mom and siblings alienated me because I couldn't afford to help S they expected. They were super entitled and did disgusting things to me and it affected work in a lot of ways.

  • @ZeeInterpretationz
    @ZeeInterpretationz 2 года назад +6

    The problem is we think a person will change coz they becoming older. No matter that you have aunties and uncle's when you lose a mum you an orphan. Those people will never help you.

  • @seforatshabalala7798
    @seforatshabalala7798 2 года назад +11

    Cry sister...those tears will dry and only God is a waymaker. These things happen to people. Get stronger for yourself and your siblings.That pain must not keep you on hold, keep on moving with faith🤗❤

  • @G.DD3SS
    @G.DD3SS 2 года назад +19

    Hey Owamie. I can relate to some of the pain that you are going through. I too have felt rejected by my own parent who considered me and my siblings a burden and prioritised other people over her own children. I'm still healing from that and I wish healing and peace for you and your siblings too.

  • @sonwabilesharon3193
    @sonwabilesharon3193 2 года назад +5

    Toxic Father's 😭😭😭😭😭 yoh I can relate . It all began 2014 I started also beging for my father's love but I was done.

  • @victoriasomtyato4400
    @victoriasomtyato4400 2 года назад +4

    So sorry that you are this hurt by the situation with your father.

  • @queenm5394
    @queenm5394 2 года назад +8

    I'm number 1 on the pre-order list, no matter how long it takes I'm getting that book queen ninja 🤗🤗

  • @JustDiane.
    @JustDiane. 2 года назад +4

    I understand because its been 5 years and im still battling. Don't rush the grief

  • @likhonafihlani3862
    @likhonafihlani3862 2 года назад +6

    I wish I could just give you a warm hug...2013 was the worst year for most people as I also lost my grandmother who was everything to me and my family. She left a void that that is unreplaceable.

    • @florencemasuku7550
      @florencemasuku7550 2 года назад

      I lost my grandma in November 2013 as well, I still remember it like it was yesterday. I feel sad seeing my mum feeling low at times cause I know she misses her mum more than anything. But I just thank God for giving us a good dad and husband to my mum . No one deserves to go through what owamie is going through. So sad

  • @miriammij5254
    @miriammij5254 2 года назад +5

    I know what you going through my father is the same he even turned my mom against me all my siblings don't talk to me because of the man I call father my mom died last December after 16yrs not taking I just called her not knowing she was going to die I knew it's not my mom foult we forgave each other
    What has helped me is pray coz it gave be depression for year almost took my own life but the lord saved me

  • @disekomotsepe
    @disekomotsepe 2 года назад +7

    Thank you for this vid. I am going through something very different, but letting out the tears just cleared my mind. Now I have to start making decisions ❤️❤️❤️let's figure out this life things together. Stay true and keep fighting

  • @thumekajordaan3920
    @thumekajordaan3920 2 года назад +3

    This is too painful ninja, it cuts the deepest 💔💔

  • @mbalimokoena2750
    @mbalimokoena2750 2 года назад +3

    This is really emotional.. Thank you for letting us in and sharing these unfortunate times with us.. You are loved and appreciated

  • @myselfazania7771
    @myselfazania7771 2 года назад +18

    One thing about black fathers …they will hurt you when they get a chance . If my father hadn’t done what he did , There’s some mistakes that I know for sure that I wouldn’t have done . But I thank God for being with me and turning my life around . Even after success I still couldn’t get over what my dad put us through. The shame , the prolonged years of suffering, the hopelessness that he put us through. But one day I had to look at the mirror and face my past demons and allow for complete healing. And after I did that I felt whole again . But some people don’t get that chance . They suffer from trauma forever 😭

  • @phuti_leblomo9000
    @phuti_leblomo9000 2 года назад +25

    Not me crying with you through out this video😔💔. I'm sending you love and strength Owamie, you and your siblings, may God carry you guys through this hard time and give you the strength to accept so that you can enjoy all the good things in your life without having to worry about the constant pain that you feeling over certain things. We love you so much queen Ninja ❤❤❤

    • @mrsx2596
      @mrsx2596 2 года назад

      Tjooohh that was me 😓😓

  • @thenamakays6871
    @thenamakays6871 2 года назад +6

    My heart was bleeding from watching this video, I know what is to have a bad parent 😔 😞 😢 💔...Owmie God knows what you are going through and he wants to make you very strong so you will be able to take care of your baby sisters..hugs and love ❤ 🤗🤗🤗

  • @fikilemahlindza3152
    @fikilemahlindza3152 2 года назад +3

    'That's what happens when you're motherless '...that broke me .

  • @wanderlustkuki
    @wanderlustkuki 2 года назад +2

    Thank you for being so open and vulnerable. You are helping so many of us.

  • @mphomirandalefhatshe4342
    @mphomirandalefhatshe4342 2 года назад +6

    Hi Owamie you may have forgotten to put the link to the travel youtubers..

  • @innoh3895
    @innoh3895 2 года назад +6

    As a first born with responsibilities I totally understand. Love and strength to you Wamie, keep pushing, do your regular self introspection and check ins, stay prayed up and allow the Lord to lift off all the heaviness. Take care of yourself my love, you are doing the best you can continue❤

  • @happilysmile01
    @happilysmile01 2 года назад +2

    I’m so sorry, he sounds like such a horrible man Owamie. Please don’t ever waste another second of your life on that nasty man. I’m praying for your healing.

  • @Veey10
    @Veey10 2 года назад +7

    Wow this is so painful! I literally cried with u. 😭😭 I'm so sorry that u had to go through this my Queen, but U are going to be& are fine without him, I know it's hard, especially when it's your very own making your life hell. Sometimes we just have to be kinder to ourselves& do whatever the heck is right for us. Sending u love& light hunny 🙏🏽💜💜💜

  • @thatcoding_teacher1258
    @thatcoding_teacher1258 2 года назад +3

    I am very sorry you are going through this. No one deserves so much pain. Please seek help. Strength and light.

  • @lesterdampie6134
    @lesterdampie6134 2 года назад +2

    We appreciate you so much. Thank you for sharing such a vulnerable part of yourself, yet again. Wishing you so much strength, healing, and successful therapy. ✨️ Please gift us that book. The OG Ninjas will support you. ❤️🌹

  • @tatsohrams
    @tatsohrams 2 года назад +7

    You are your mother bbes… I swear she is smiling 🙂 cry bbes but you are killing it hun ❤️❤️❤️ God is with you .. you will never struggle again don’t worry bbes ❤️❤️💕💕sending hugs to you❤️❤️💕💕

  • @naledikuse6343
    @naledikuse6343 2 года назад +19

    Your skin is fresh and clear 😎😎

  • @annamayyy9771
    @annamayyy9771 2 года назад +2

    Hey Owamie,
    I'm sorry about the trauma you have endured. You know I used to think I was alone. Thank you for sharing your story. I lost my mother when I was 10 and she passed away on Christmas day in the evening. 2years later my grandmother from my mother's side passed. She loved me so much. I then discovered later that my father never cared about me. He never defended me. People saw how he treated me and took advantage eventually I gained the courage and left. Alot happened. Alot of pain. I ended up cutting communication with my father completely he never had anything positive to say. I then discovered that he was a narcissist. My mother passed away at 29/30. She had me when she was young. The good part is that you have gotten to a place where you are financially stable. And with children that are orphans the good part is God gifts you with success. Stay strong. God loves you.

  • @joyceradebe9835
    @joyceradebe9835 2 года назад +3

    God Has been your Strength and will always be🙏

  • @lioness3433
    @lioness3433 2 года назад +8

    Owamie...thank you for sharing. I feel like a load has been lifted on my side by your story. What happened to you I can relate, there's too much on my side as well. In summary, my dad pulled an axe on us for donation money that was collected at my mothers funeral. The first year of having to live without our mother, we were in court with an assault case against our living parent. Ladies should never say they are staying in toxic marriages for the children...those children are going to be traumatised adults. I'm an orphan with a living parent.

  • @tshegosspace4754
    @tshegosspace4754 2 года назад +8

    U have been through a lot and through it all u have been putting other people first. I'm glad ur acknowledging when ur not okay and going to therapy, ur mental health is important. Whenever u need to release or rant or cough out feel free, we might not change the experiences in ur life but we're here to listen. U will get through this, I love the fact that u deal with situations in ur life head on. When u feel overwhelmed take a little break and deal with things one at a time, right now it's just too much for one person. I have u and sisters in my prayers💕

  • @joyent7643
    @joyent7643 2 года назад

    On behalf of all fathers who are and have inflicted pain on their children knowingly or unknowingly, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry that someone who is supposed to protect and fight for you, love you didn't do so. I am sorry. I have also experienced such and for the life of me I cannot figure how someone does that or where they get the audacity from to say the things they say.
    I am sorry.

  • @mantemoruthane8975
    @mantemoruthane8975 2 года назад +8

    Morning you highness… it’s okay to feel overwhelmed sometimes, I don’t judge you my sister we all have those times where 1 feels like the world is unfair and have so much questions, sending you love and light❤️❤️♥️💐

  • @Skhonza
    @Skhonza 2 года назад +2

    Sending you lots of warm hugs. love and Light to you hun!!

  • @tatsohrams
    @tatsohrams 2 года назад +7

    The man won’t change
    Hope your sisters let him go …
    That’s all they should do tbh 🙏🙏we have a father in heaven 💕❤️

  • @anitatumeka1466
    @anitatumeka1466 2 года назад +3

    Allow yourself to feel dear❤️🌹 love and light.

  • @melisahluthando57
    @melisahluthando57 2 года назад +3

    Intandane enhle ngumakhothwa ngunina 💕, hope you heal from this🥺💐

  • @florencemasuku7550
    @florencemasuku7550 2 года назад +1

    So sad . No one deserves to go through this .

  • @veniadolph7375
    @veniadolph7375 2 года назад +3

    The trauma parents put kids through😔 Sending you so much love Owamie❤️

  • @katli..._everyday
    @katli..._everyday 2 года назад +3

    I am sorry for your ordeal I hope that your sister's can see that he doesn't want them and he doesn't care so they can close this chapter with him and understand and value your hardwork trying to make a life for them, because there is nothing as hurtful as raising ur siblings or ur kids in this situation alone and degraded only for them to grow up and be successful and go share their success and spend on that same person who didn't support them or care if they are alive or dead...
    Don't worry my love God has got ur back just continue to pray for strength and wisdom and open opportunities for you we will support u in our own little way of watching ur videos and all the ads..
    Stay positive and prayerful with ur siblings and show them everything make sure they are aware of what's happening with their father let them be part of the process

  • @kekeopinions5034
    @kekeopinions5034 2 года назад +5

    Your story Owamie😢😥💔I know exactly what you talking about💔😭This cut deep😢I think most of us we've been surviving 😓to go by everyday I pray to God for a new strength and courage to go on because without those I don't think I can survive 🙏 so you too Pray to God to give you new strength and the courage to move on and move forward ❤

  • @PhilileNhlapo-k8o
    @PhilileNhlapo-k8o 3 месяца назад

    Exactly my father. Evil, wicked toxic and ....

  • @kerilengzungu8703
    @kerilengzungu8703 2 года назад +7

    Now it makes sense now. I always thought that maybe your issues feel like from the polygamous marriage, where things were not treated equally or fairly. 🙏💔

  • @leratopalesankonoane3644
    @leratopalesankonoane3644 2 года назад +2

    I am sorry you have to go through this. But God will not give you challenges u can't handle. To be honest you have done so well for yourself most people will not be able to achieve what you have achieved. Keep your head high, I pray you find peace and healing in all this.

  • @phililemosia6956
    @phililemosia6956 2 года назад

    So imotional that I cried with u Owamie 😢 💔. Thank u so much for sharing bcz a lot of ppl are going through similar issues and u are giving hope to many.

  • @sinazosolani2402
    @sinazosolani2402 2 года назад +5

    You strong sana as I’m watching you I’m going through it’s tight ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️ I love you 😘

  • @perekisi
    @perekisi 2 года назад +14

    The best love you can give to your husband is to love his children as a step mother. Is to encourage your husband to do the right things to your step children.

    • @mrsx2596
      @mrsx2596 2 года назад +1

      My goodness you took my words there is no way as a stepmom I will allow a man to do this to he’s own kids but to be honest I wouldn’t be even a stepmother cause he wouldn’t deserve me if he treats he’s own kids like that 🙄

  • @victorioussisters3307
    @victorioussisters3307 2 года назад +11

    The Holy Book states: Love covers a multitude of sins. I believe it more now. Your mum shielded you guys from your dad’s toxicity, she’s the one who took it all in; and made sure that you see him like a father, a loving man. So when that shield (mum) was taken away now you experience everything she’s been through since she was with your dad until her last moment.
    I pray that you all heal sisi, pray, pray, pray. Also pray for him. The Lord is so good, He’s carried you this far for a reason, now you’re their pillar and shield. I’ll keep you in my prayers too. ❤️

  • @kelebogilepreciousmoloko87
    @kelebogilepreciousmoloko87 2 года назад

    I need your strength to let go of toxicity.... But I am praying for myself, God will see me through. Thanks for this Owamie. More blessings to you

  • @gardeningwithbettyk8840
    @gardeningwithbettyk8840 2 года назад +5

    Why are you making us cry so early in the morning 🥺🥺😢😢😢 please do check in cos this story is painful sending love and light 💡 your way ❤️

  • @rabelanirabs6099
    @rabelanirabs6099 2 года назад +12

    This is where one had to remind people that when you talk about her don't forget to say " but honestly her ninjas love her shame" ❤️
    The love I am seeing on comment section is so humbling ❤️

  • @boitumelomonageng4320
    @boitumelomonageng4320 2 года назад +4

    Thank you for this video, sadly so relatable.

  • @justhumanrampai4882
    @justhumanrampai4882 2 года назад

    💔💔… so sorry momma. I wish you light, strength and healing.

  • @zinhlemthembu1067
    @zinhlemthembu1067 2 года назад +8

    We have a Heavenly Father who loves you unconditionally, your father on earth is just possessed by the evil spirits that roam this earth. Do not let these spirits pull you down, I pray that God heals you that you come to point of acceptance and let go and Let God Father you forever. Give it to the real Father and let it go. The devil always play on our emotions to mentally break us down, creating doubt about God. Let God heal you and your family.

  • @lulufierce01
    @lulufierce01 2 года назад +7

    Hugging you through the screen babe❤
    Definitely go to therapy Wamie.

  • @simphiwekhubisa5878
    @simphiwekhubisa5878 2 года назад +6

    This video is triggering😭😭😭...I can't relate but I hope you heal this is very painful watching this literally made me realize that humans can be cruel and evil. I also wish your dad learns that he failed and should try and do better. We are not here forever akazame ukulungisa leliphutha😔

    • @thatotlhowe
      @thatotlhowe 2 года назад +2

      Her dad is one of those who will call her to come home just to apologize because it's his last day breathing.
      It's sad man Yoh.

    • @simphiwekhubisa5878
      @simphiwekhubisa5878 2 года назад +1

      @@thatotlhowe very true😕

  • @lindelwamthinkulu863
    @lindelwamthinkulu863 2 года назад +8

    Hi my girl I don't know where to start as to how your lifestory is so touching as you have narrated . Let me first of all say SORRY about everything . All that you do is not in vain before God , you are such a good big sisi who needs to be appreciated and respected . We all appreciate your courage , hardworking and your success. Just keep on remembering that our rewards are in heaven . Your character will not be appreciated in your industry especially just keep on moving with the gift God has given you . Look up to Him as your SOURCE OF STRENGTH , If I could advise I could say forget about your so-called father . He only give hurt than good . You are not alone a lot of us are faced with this situation . I pray that God will help you to delete him from your mind and find comfort in God as our FATHER who cares ND loves us . I have grown without him , my mother had to raises of us alone working very hard to make ends meet. Please for your health delete and ask God to help you forgive him because it's doing damage to you than at him . Just look at your success as God's PROVISION so as to look after your siblings and provide for your needs . Do read Psalms there is a lot of comfort and encouragement you'll find as you'll identify with situations and see how they trusted God and how He intervened . It has helped me a lot in my life . The GREATEST THERAPIST IS GOD' S WORD AND WORSHIP not that you mustn't go to them but they are also human they fight with limited power whereas God gets into all corners of our life to heal us . You are such a brave girl I admire your strength and push in life . Please include God's hand in your life to fight for you for He cares . We love you 😍 you have good advises and a good heart . Don't let the enemy steal all the good that is in you . If we all can tell you what we 've gone through you are not alone .At one stage I was passing through a hard time in life in a rough marriage God directed me to Psalm 107 it really helped me a lot . Confess positively about your life say depression and other sicknesses won't affect me it's a way of getting rid of them than fearing it will come back NO we refuse about our lives to be affected when Jesus took it all at the cross on our behalf . Do confess Psalm 27 , 91 meditate on them play WORSHIP SONGS you'll feel God's PRESENCE and heal . Stay STRONG baby girl we are with you in our prayers too . Just ignore the negative and move on trusting Gor's hand . All people's actions will ONE DAY be judged by the Almighty God . Feel your memories with the love your mom gave you . Wishing you GREAT SUCCESS , OVERFLOW in everything , stay focused and let the enemies not find joy when they see your tears . You are a good girl ALL THE BEST IN EVERYTHING LOVE LOVE LOVE ❤

  • @bonolobonolo3478
    @bonolobonolo3478 2 года назад +1

    all I know is that God is everywhere even in the darkest moments and he sees everything that's happening and all the emotions happening and won't let you to suffer Owamie.... you have a lot on your shoulders and believe me God is caring it for you actually it's not on your shoulders,God took over... I hope your sisters see , understand and appreciate what you doing n going through....I hope you go to therapy and get well ,it's so sad,,my heart is so sad to see you like this💔💔💔.And it happens for one to find themselves not being liked or accepted from both mother and father family sides,, Owamie you belong to God , you're God's child and that's it...keep working hard and pray about everything I say this because I find peace n rest that way... ♥️Love you Owamie so much and one day you'll look back at this too and be shocked

  • @lindok
    @lindok 2 года назад +5

    Yoh that is so painful he couldnt wait to discard yall😭he was pretending for her yoh💔 that is horrible!

  • @cathymakoma8964
    @cathymakoma8964 2 года назад +4

    Sorry owamie.zwido fhela.this too shall pass.keeping you in my prayers 🙏 ❤️

  • @shataditswai2673
    @shataditswai2673 2 года назад +1

    You gonna be ohk ninja, you wouldn't understand if u never go through it, big hugs and kisses tight 🤗 🫂💐we are with you through all ❤️❣️

  • @nelzg5819
    @nelzg5819 2 года назад +34

    When U say Owamie that had your mom walked out of this marriage sooner (cause the redflags were always there) the outcome would have most likely been different for herself and for you guys. I felt that. To us whoz mothers were bold enough and loved us enough to walk away not cause it was easy but because they wanted us to have a better life, I agree with your statement. This is why I am no advocate of fighting for men who cheat and blaming of the other party. Men will show u Flames and they will show in marriage, during divorce and after divorce. Ladies leave when u see redflags. It can only get worse. The mental health issues will not only affect the wife but they will trickle down to the kids. Leave. There is life before marriage and life thereafter.
    I wish your mother would have had the courage to walk out and leave the psychotic man to do as he pleases with his life. U guys would have been just fine.

  • @ziphozihlealiva7947
    @ziphozihlealiva7947 2 года назад +2

    There's nothing anyone can really say to make up for all you and your family have been through. May God bless you and make you smile, I'm so grateful that you know love from your mom. Even though it may hurt, to know that you know love is a huge blessing and may God bless you in abundance ❤ we love you

  • @lelethuniselo5272
    @lelethuniselo5272 2 года назад +5

    Sending love to you and your sisters❤️

  • @toolietools1316
    @toolietools1316 2 года назад +3

    Love and light to you Queen Ninja💐❤.

  • @refiloemosikidi930
    @refiloemosikidi930 2 года назад +3

    Trust the process girl, you can never win unless you have haters ,its a fact, stay strong and remember that no matter what happens in this life, no-one can take away what God has put on this earth for you

  • @krystelkistnasamy4367
    @krystelkistnasamy4367 2 года назад

    Your pain is felt. Wish you healing always and I look forward to reading your book.

  • @simplymel_b9833
    @simplymel_b9833 2 года назад +2

    You are so strong Queen. It's been 16 years since I lost my mom and I still can not talk about her without breaking down. God has got you and he will continue to bless you and your sisters ❤️

  • @pamelasejake2198
    @pamelasejake2198 2 года назад +3

    Iyoo my Queen I 'm so sorry for everything that happened to you and your sisters it is very sad

  • @That_Shane
    @That_Shane 2 года назад +6

    30:53 and that statement... if you want to be understood then u need to come to a place where u understand that hurt people hurt people...he probably had a terrible experience coming up that made him the way he is...nd you have been getting back at people who u feel test you,you are an angry raging woman...goes back to a statement u made the other day that if people dnt get with your programme,u cut them off even if they are family...thts precisely how your da has handled people who dnt get with his program

  • @Aseza_Memke
    @Aseza_Memke 2 года назад

    Thanks for sharing Owamie, they are lot of people that are going through that. They think it is shame to share that. Thanks for opening doors of sharing and minimizing depression.

  • @kerilengzungu2206
    @kerilengzungu2206 2 года назад

    Continue your journey...Your ranting was helping healing process. It's called catharsis. God loves you. No weapon formed against you shall prosper.🙏

  • @simplynkule
    @simplynkule 2 года назад +1

    This is so sad to watch. Ncese Sisi I feel your pain. Go through those horrible emotions. Healing is a rollercoaster. Sending love to you.

  • @pozisazityebile8573
    @pozisazityebile8573 2 года назад +10

    Ur father z just like my father Ninja.. I'm just glad tht my mom was not married to him and am the only child kumamam kuye...
    Ull be fine Ninja I guarantee tht..❤❤❤

  • @xolisankonki8006
    @xolisankonki8006 2 года назад

    Owami trauma has no expiry date. You are on point, please check in with a Therapist....have an ongoing check up. Can only imagine what you're going through. Time never heal , it only gets better or you learn to live with the pain. Wishing you well.

  • @lolondlovu8207
    @lolondlovu8207 2 года назад +1

    Be strong ninja, this too shall pass your mom is in a better place now, your dad, karma knows his address his day is coming. Just release him and forgive him a selfish narcissist

  • @dineomachinene240
    @dineomachinene240 2 года назад

    I can only imagine the pain you had to deal with, it pains me just watching this. Life experiences really builds the people we are today and that is a challenge as it affects the most important decisions we make in the present. My heart bleeds because I have experienced pain that will make me cry every time I talk about it.

  • @Keekeembhele
    @Keekeembhele 2 года назад

    It’s sad to say this but I find a bit of comfort knowing that I’m not the only one with an absent father and bot just absent but absolutely selfish and narcissistic one. My mom is also late and I always hoped he would be the knight in an shinny armer who would save us from being adults at a young age but he failed to do so…as usual. May we find peace in God, our children and siblings even in partners. ❤️❤️

  • @sinethembamagasela1833
    @sinethembamagasela1833 2 года назад +1

    You have been through alot Owamie, you need professional help for your mental health. I feel like your wounds are still fresh, anyway I keep you in my prayers always 🙏