Slowly waning out of an understanding with a friend. The realization that they, or worse, you, were never what you believed to yourself to be. "Or did you never used to be." Perhaps none of us are as kind as we initially believed ourselves to be? Perhaps we can grow beyond it, beyond ourselves.
I watched this movie a few days ago and after it ended, I just bawled my eyes out, Not because I'm trying to hype it up or anything but because i could heavily relate to it, And in some parts, It made me see myself in it, Made me see the worst parts of myself in colm and the innoncent parts of myself that slowly fade away as time passes by in Padraic, And how slowly but surely everyone I love keep fading away in the end, I thought I was nice, Or maybe I never used to be, Yeah... Maybe I never used to be...
not everyone is perfect my friend, yes we do make mistakes that make us feel the worst at times but we should not punish ourselves for the past mistakes we made because we are just humans, we make mistakes, what's important is that we must learn our lessons and keep moving forward, peacefully. that's all. Hope u are okay, friend. Take care of urself
I'm always nice. And wow, I loved people. Maybe because I liked them so much, I believed they liked me too. No idea. I suppose it's possible to totally misread people in such a way. I hope not though.
Sometimes it’s not necessary that someone we like will also like us back and that’s harsh when you realise it but that’s how world is, that’s how PEOPLE are. So know your worth always and back off from the places and people that don’t appreciate you and ur friendship. Hope this helps ♥️
I recently fell out with a friend. This reminds me of our conversation/argument. In 2022 I came out as trans and since then, I thought he supported me but some thing bothered me and I decided to talk so I’d know, he’s not who I was making things up about. If I take things out, he’s reassure me he’s my friend and he respects who I am. And when I asked if he’ll ever see me as a guy; he said no. Not even in the future he won’t. One of the things that stuck with me from the talk was when he said we both knew out differences but we were still friends. I didn’t know. I always thought he was my friend who saw me as one of the boys. But he just made me feel more stupid for thinking we were friends.
It's not always possible to change how you view someone in order to align with the way they view themselves, especially if you've known them for a long time, before the change. I don't know your friend and I'm certainly not trying to invalidate how you feel, your feelings are valid. But if he truly supported you and respected you, isn't that the most important part of a friendship? It sounds like he at least respected you enough to be upfront and honest with you when you asked him a hard question, knowing that you wouldn't like the answer...Someone who didn't respect you would just lie and tell you what you wanted to hear. I'm not saying be friends with him again if you don't want to, it's entirely up to you. All I'm saying is, I don't think that him not being able to see you as "one of the boys" meant that he wasn't your friend, it just meant that he wasn't able to align his view of you with your view of yourself. And ultimately, it's rare that we'll find anyone in life who sees us exactly the way we see ourselves or want to be seen. I say this as someone who has lost friends unnecessarily before due to disagreements or misunderstandings like this. Friends don't always have to see eye to eye on everything, what's important at the end of the day is they're there for each other and respect each other. Those kinda people are hard to come by, so hold onto them when you find them.
@@Sparxychu I get that. We both wanted to be friends but I just couldn’t stay around a friend who has probably been considering me as a female. He just made me feel terrible at that point because the times the males of the group hung out on his plans or the little comments were kinda proven to be his true opinions. He called another friend of ours, confused because that friend said he was gay while dating another trans guy. At that moment, I thought he was making one of those weird jokes (I don’t know how to explain it) and I just kinda awkwardly let it slide. During our argument/last talk, he was….like, not listening to my reasons/answers. He said “why do you feel like a boy?”, I answered, “I just do. I feel like that is right, it makes me feel comfortable”. His response, “why?”. I had to somehow answer him again saying it made me feel better than being a girl? He asked why again. He probably asked me why like 5 times. I was hella upset. To me, you can’t just ask “why” over and over to a personal question. It’s like….my opinion? Like, I love apples. “Why?”, cuz they’re tasty. “Why?” ….cuz they’re crunchy…? -I just don’t get how you can ask why multiple times to a personal preference/opinion/whatever you wanna call it. To me, my friends are the ones I care and love and they do the same back. I treat them how I wanna be treated And I have said to a mutual friend who is still friends with him, that she can tell him; if he wants to I don’t know, say he’s sorry for upsetting me and that he considers me a guy, I will gladly apologise too and be friends again; fresh starts. Side note; i love your profile picture :)
@@corn_flakez3495 Thank you! My friend drew it for me years ago haha And yeah, I get what you're saying. Ultimately it's entirely up to you who your friends are, if you're not comfortable being friends with someone for whatever reason, you should never feel forced to. I understand it's frustrating to be questioned on part of your identity like that. It can be hard to explain why you feel the way you do to someone else, especially if you're not even exactly sure why you feel that way. From my perspective, it sounds like maybe he was trying to understand what it means to be trans for you, especially since different people are trans for different reasons. For some it's because they have dysphoria over their physical bodies/their secondary sex characteristics (breasts, genitals, facial hair, etc.) while for others it's more so of a social dysphoria, they don't fit into gender stereotypes/roles or society's expectations of their gender, or they typically enjoy things that are "for" the opposite gender (according to society 🙄) and so they feel that they should be that gender instead. For some it's a mixture of both. Regardless, like I said I'm not telling you to be friends with him again. I guess my only advice would be, accept that some people will probably never see you exactly the way you see yourself/want to be seen and that's okay, it doesn't take away from who you are and it also doesn't make them bad people or mean that you can't be friends with them (if you want to be). It's just not as easy as some people think to change your perception of a person, our brains just aren't wired like that. I'm not trans myself but I know many people who are and one of them once told someone else who was questioning if they were trans, something along the lines of, "Ask yourself if you'd be happy living as a trans-man specifically and potentially non-passing, or if you'd only be happy being perceived as a cis or 'real' man. Ask yourself if you could be secure in yourself because you see yourself as a man, or if you could only be secure if others also see you as a man." He basically told this person (the one questioning if they were trans/should transition) to not expect to be treated like "one of the guys" and that they should only transition if they want to do it for themself and themself alone, not to be accepted as a man by others, because chances are most people that they knew beforehand wouldn't just start automatically seeing them as one all of a sudden. He wasn't trying to discourage the person from transitioning, he just wanted to give them a reality check and make sure they knew before transitioning that they probably wouldn't be treated like a cis man, because they weren't a cis man, and that was okay, that was just part of being trans. It was more important to be secure in themself rather than expecting society to validate how they felt. But sorry for that tangent, chances are you probably already knew all of that anyway being trans yourself. Regardless I hope you're able to work past the fallout with your friend, whether that's accepting life without him or reconciling with him. I know fallouts like that can be really upsetting, wouldn't wish it on anyone.
Кино
probably the most haunting edits ive ever seen, im so watching this movie
thank you for the nice words and yes you should watch this movie, it left me speechless
@@tesfaye.mp4yup. Watched towards the end of 2022. I was in tears basically the whole time
Slowly waning out of an understanding with a friend. The realization that they, or worse, you, were never what you believed to yourself to be.
"Or did you never used to be." Perhaps none of us are as kind as we initially believed ourselves to be? Perhaps we can grow beyond it, beyond ourselves.
damn bro, hope you are okay
@@tesfaye.mp4 Perfectly fine. Life just takes some people down different, often surprising paths. That doesn't mean you have to be sad about it.
Glad to hear that, life's not easy for some people but you gotta be strong and keep moving@@passerby1200
Oh Tobb and Copper when will you learn.
will learn what?
I watched this movie a few days ago and after it ended, I just bawled my eyes out, Not because I'm trying to hype it up or anything but because i could heavily relate to it, And in some parts, It made me see myself in it, Made me see the worst parts of myself in colm and the innoncent parts of myself that slowly fade away as time passes by in Padraic, And how slowly but surely everyone I love keep fading away in the end, I thought I was nice, Or maybe I never used to be, Yeah... Maybe I never used to be...
not everyone is perfect my friend, yes we do make mistakes that make us feel the worst at times but we should not punish ourselves for the past mistakes we made because we are just humans, we make mistakes, what's important is that we must learn our lessons and keep moving forward, peacefully. that's all. Hope u are okay, friend. Take care of urself
@@tesfaye.mp4thanks, man. I really needed those words 🫂
This looks so professional! I can see this at the Cannes or Toronto Film Festivals as a trailer.
Omg! Thank u for the kind words❤
makes me wanna watch this movie!! Such a good edit 🩵
Do watch the movie it’s a must and thank you for the kind words🫶🥹
I still am
I'm always nice. And wow, I loved people. Maybe because I liked them so much, I believed they liked me too. No idea. I suppose it's possible to totally misread people in such a way. I hope not though.
Sometimes it’s not necessary that someone we like will also like us back and that’s harsh when you realise it but that’s how world is, that’s how PEOPLE are. So know your worth always and back off from the places and people that don’t appreciate you and ur friendship. Hope this helps ♥️
Whats the song in the background for this?
Agape by Nicholas Britell
@@atiithe THANK YOU YOU ARE AMAZING
I recently fell out with a friend. This reminds me of our conversation/argument. In 2022 I came out as trans and since then, I thought he supported me but some thing bothered me and I decided to talk so I’d know, he’s not who I was making things up about. If I take things out, he’s reassure me he’s my friend and he respects who I am. And when I asked if he’ll ever see me as a guy; he said no. Not even in the future he won’t.
One of the things that stuck with me from the talk was when he said we both knew out differences but we were still friends. I didn’t know.
I always thought he was my friend who saw me as one of the boys. But he just made me feel more stupid for thinking we were friends.
It's not always possible to change how you view someone in order to align with the way they view themselves, especially if you've known them for a long time, before the change. I don't know your friend and I'm certainly not trying to invalidate how you feel, your feelings are valid. But if he truly supported you and respected you, isn't that the most important part of a friendship? It sounds like he at least respected you enough to be upfront and honest with you when you asked him a hard question, knowing that you wouldn't like the answer...Someone who didn't respect you would just lie and tell you what you wanted to hear.
I'm not saying be friends with him again if you don't want to, it's entirely up to you. All I'm saying is, I don't think that him not being able to see you as "one of the boys" meant that he wasn't your friend, it just meant that he wasn't able to align his view of you with your view of yourself. And ultimately, it's rare that we'll find anyone in life who sees us exactly the way we see ourselves or want to be seen.
I say this as someone who has lost friends unnecessarily before due to disagreements or misunderstandings like this. Friends don't always have to see eye to eye on everything, what's important at the end of the day is they're there for each other and respect each other. Those kinda people are hard to come by, so hold onto them when you find them.
@@Sparxychu I get that. We both wanted to be friends but I just couldn’t stay around a friend who has probably been considering me as a female. He just made me feel terrible at that point because the times the males of the group hung out on his plans or the little comments were kinda proven to be his true opinions. He called another friend of ours, confused because that friend said he was gay while dating another trans guy. At that moment, I thought he was making one of those weird jokes (I don’t know how to explain it) and I just kinda awkwardly let it slide.
During our argument/last talk, he was….like, not listening to my reasons/answers. He said “why do you feel like a boy?”, I answered, “I just do. I feel like that is right, it makes me feel comfortable”. His response, “why?”. I had to somehow answer him again saying it made me feel better than being a girl? He asked why again. He probably asked me why like 5 times. I was hella upset. To me, you can’t just ask “why” over and over to a personal question. It’s like….my opinion? Like, I love apples. “Why?”, cuz they’re tasty. “Why?” ….cuz they’re crunchy…? -I just don’t get how you can ask why multiple times to a personal preference/opinion/whatever you wanna call it.
To me, my friends are the ones I care and love and they do the same back. I treat them how I wanna be treated
And I have said to a mutual friend who is still friends with him, that she can tell him; if he wants to I don’t know, say he’s sorry for upsetting me and that he considers me a guy, I will gladly apologise too and be friends again; fresh starts.
Side note; i love your profile picture :)
@@corn_flakez3495 Thank you! My friend drew it for me years ago haha
And yeah, I get what you're saying. Ultimately it's entirely up to you who your friends are, if you're not comfortable being friends with someone for whatever reason, you should never feel forced to.
I understand it's frustrating to be questioned on part of your identity like that. It can be hard to explain why you feel the way you do to someone else, especially if you're not even exactly sure why you feel that way. From my perspective, it sounds like maybe he was trying to understand what it means to be trans for you, especially since different people are trans for different reasons. For some it's because they have dysphoria over their physical bodies/their secondary sex characteristics (breasts, genitals, facial hair, etc.) while for others it's more so of a social dysphoria, they don't fit into gender stereotypes/roles or society's expectations of their gender, or they typically enjoy things that are "for" the opposite gender (according to society 🙄) and so they feel that they should be that gender instead. For some it's a mixture of both.
Regardless, like I said I'm not telling you to be friends with him again. I guess my only advice would be, accept that some people will probably never see you exactly the way you see yourself/want to be seen and that's okay, it doesn't take away from who you are and it also doesn't make them bad people or mean that you can't be friends with them (if you want to be). It's just not as easy as some people think to change your perception of a person, our brains just aren't wired like that.
I'm not trans myself but I know many people who are and one of them once told someone else who was questioning if they were trans, something along the lines of, "Ask yourself if you'd be happy living as a trans-man specifically and potentially non-passing, or if you'd only be happy being perceived as a cis or 'real' man. Ask yourself if you could be secure in yourself because you see yourself as a man, or if you could only be secure if others also see you as a man." He basically told this person (the one questioning if they were trans/should transition) to not expect to be treated like "one of the guys" and that they should only transition if they want to do it for themself and themself alone, not to be accepted as a man by others, because chances are most people that they knew beforehand wouldn't just start automatically seeing them as one all of a sudden. He wasn't trying to discourage the person from transitioning, he just wanted to give them a reality check and make sure they knew before transitioning that they probably wouldn't be treated like a cis man, because they weren't a cis man, and that was okay, that was just part of being trans. It was more important to be secure in themself rather than expecting society to validate how they felt.
But sorry for that tangent, chances are you probably already knew all of that anyway being trans yourself. Regardless I hope you're able to work past the fallout with your friend, whether that's accepting life without him or reconciling with him. I know fallouts like that can be really upsetting, wouldn't wish it on anyone.
Non