@@OboeLatte1 Thanks 😊 I think this is original 🤔 Richard Lingard’s 1696 pamphlet entitled “A Letter of Advice to a Young Gentleman Leaving the University Concerning His Behaviour and Conversation in the World,” “If you would read a mans (sic) Disposition, see him Game, you will then learn more of him in one hour, than in seven Years Conversation.”
@sroth2021 Inspire the idea to have fun if you want to know someone's character winning and losing and also how they handle a challenge, which is life. You need a good team to endure life's ups and downs, and you might as well have fun. I didn't lie, I was mistaken thinking it was Plato. I was happy finding a better answer.
Looking into the right eyes can change your whole world. You stare at their soul when you look into their eyes. You can see pain, happiness, anxiety, excitement and anger.
Dr. Peterson is always so good at verbalizing the unspoken truths about human behavior!! The between-the-lines things that describe us as beings, yet most of us can't quite put into words the way that he does.
@@mirosDV A nice joke yes but hips do not lie. A person that cares to about you or what you have to say typically orients their body to face you or moves a bit closer to you.
While I was in a shopping centre, someone caught my eye. Without even thinking, I smiled. A relaxed, casual smile. She didn't know what to do. How to take my smile. I watched her go through what I felt was surprise, oh, someone noticed me, slight embarrassment, then the realisation that a complete stranger smiled at her. Sincerely, with no other expectations. This all went through her mind within a fraction of time. Then, she smiled back. It was lovely. A learning experience for me. I spent a couple of hours smiling randomly at people while walking around, enjoying those that responded positively. A few people didn't react whatsoever, their thoughts elsewhere. And then one or two absolutely scowled at me! I left thinking about the body language, eye contact (or the lack thereof), and the vibes I got from one or two people that rendered them into a dark category all of their own. It had been a very enlightening day. And one I'll never forget.
Agreed, however, I used to work with young people with autism, and I have learned a lot, non verbal communications, people's energy. I pay attention to someone entire body when they are communicating. Their energy, state of mind, their mood, especially how they interpret words.
Most communication is non verbal. This is often struggle with Autistic people, many have face blindness. However they struggle even more on the telephone, even though they struggle face to face.
I was going to say...I'm autistic and can't look at people when I'm speaking...I physically can't do it. My body pushes it away involuntarily and to override it feels like a violation...
Dogs don't have the advanced brain of a human brain, human babies give that trusting look as well up until 6 according to the attachment theory while the brain is a sponge
You feel them. You can feel people's intent. You can feel if they are nice or if they are mean. You have their thoughts and you will notice that they aren't yours sometimes, you'll think why am I thinking that? And you'll realize they are their thoughts. When a foreign person is talking to you, you can understand what they say, you can feel them upset or flustered, you can feel when they have joy and yes you can see it in their eyes but you feel that inside. When you talk about aim, I really get that. You mentioned it in another video and said the chair is no longer a chair because your aim is the stairs, now the chair is an obstacle. That was so cool that everything we manifest is based off our aim it was a great perspective and helped very much so.
You think you can but some people have become "mean" because they've been dealing with "mean" for years but that isn't who they are away from mean people. For example, say you take a lifelong farm girl and place her in a highly populated metropolis in a dangerous neighborhood rife with thieves, pimps, rapists, drug dealers, etc. if you met her after a year or two she'd seem different than how you knew her but that doesn't mean she's actually mean, she adapted to her surroundings. Remove her from those surroundings and she'd revert to her baseline niceness. Can't be nice in a high stress situation, gets you exploited. You're right about thoughts though, if you're empathic you pick up on thoughts that don't belong to you at all. Life situations too apparently.
@@NDAsDontCoverIllegalActs I understand, it's like having kids. I often wonder if mothers were nice, then they had kids and were super stressed and just became mean. However I know that if someone doesn't feel that they will get shot they won't, if you feel bad about yourself you will do all kinds of stuff to you. So if that person was meant to leave the farm and adapt to the city then that's what they do, or if the mother has kids that's what they do. If they never wanted to do that and stay "nice" then they wouldn't do that or they would still stay nice. I would say that all that we manifest is from the product of our environment. If that person left the farm life it is because they had a reason, if a person becomes a mother they often say that their kid gave them a reason to live. Above all, no one wants to be alone. We often put ourselves into extreme situations for the fact that we try too hard and too fast to not be alone while not feeling that we deserve the best. We eventually teach ourselves though and become more wise through these experiences, or we put ourselves through hell to experience heaven. I made it so I have to try in life or else the whole world crashes down on me, I'm looking into heaven and hell at the same time and I did that to myself. I know I will succeed, I'm often scared that I won't but that's my drive to do so, I see it as a tool. The me I know I me as is not scared, but the me I am now needs that to become that person. Control your thoughts, and your actions follow, you have a reason for all that you do.
Whenever someone speaks to me, I hear them. But i ain't listening. I'm too busy focusing on their body language and their eyes. "The eyes Chico, they never lie."
My eyes wander around when I’m talking because I find a lot of eye contact to be distracting. I’m not intimidated, I just can’t think as clearly when I’m making eye contact.
Prof Peterson is a precious gift to all Humanity... no evil how ever it shows itself will not change that... Know This evil vs The Divine and Humanity, only ever one outcome.. and May God's Pure Love Bless Us All..
I think Professor Petersen needs to brush up on some facts. Also if he had all his facts straight, zi would show appreciation in thanks but without acolades
I know the people I have spent time with very well. Those same people don't and will never know me. They don't care don't listen don't care? Idk but I can tell you after I exposed myself to people I cared about showed me how much they did not care and were self absorbed. I don't trust many people but I trust in God
When I'm listening to someone I am focused on their eyes. When I speak to someone, my eyes wander around as I try to formulate my thoughts. Peterson is correct in paying attention to the eyes when getting to know someone. And when those eyes lock, both souls meet each other. You'll feel it too; and it will either make you nervous, or give you comfort. When you're met with anxiousness, then you need to be very careful with understanding why. A lot of the time the anxiousness isn't coming from the other person, it's coming from yourself. You get a deep introspection about your own insecurities.
The single biggest difference between understanding a character in a movie vs understanding a person in a conversation - in a movie most people have up to 100% of their focus on the character, in a conversation most people have up to 80% of their focus on the person.
Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let him go i did all i could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back
@juanruandk8969 & @elladonaldson-lh6nc. What the heck! You don’t manipulate someone to get back in relationship with you! That is not love. If you actually loved them, you would let them make their choices of their own free will. This so not the kind of stuff you want to play around with, in order to get your own way. Your heart will heal. It’s important to break any spiritual strongholds and soul ties that had been made and that will help you let go and feel better.
Given I’m a deep eye, forward sitting, conversationalist,… I’ve frightened most of my kids friends. Now I understand what I was doing. ThankYou Dr Peterson. As always. Clear and enlightening.
This was the most convoluted way of just saying "put yourself in other's shoes if you want to understand them" that I have ever seen, amazing way of making simple things sounds fancy
I purposely avoid eye contact with strangers when I'm walking by them. Have no issues maintaining it if I'm talking to people. I'm guessing this must be a subconscious way of communicating with strangers "Don't approach me".
If you want to truly know the people you thought were your closest friends, associates, and coworkers, just have a financial crisis and see who cares to help. When Jesus taught the story of the Good Samaritan, He was teaching what true human compassion acted like. This explains why most people walk past you as if you aren't there, unless you have something they can gain. They are the religious hypocrites of Jesus' days, who only wanted to be associated with people they could make money off of, not spend money on helping to improve their lives.
No, people may be in a financial crisis themselves without letting you know. People should be able to help with a place to sleep and food while you're there. Lending money to people is reserved to immediate family, who you already know you can trust. If someone has a financial crisis and they got there because of gambling or drugs, no one should just give them more money. Delusional take my guy.
@@sp0r26 You can help somebody through a financial crisis without lending them money. It's called being there for them when they need you. My car broke down earlier this week, I didn't have the money to fix it, and I needed to get to school that day to take my lab final. Several people that I hadn't even asked for help pulled out the stops to help me get through the day when all I wanted to do was break down.
Wait until you get into deep shit and who busts out their cutlery. You will always find that most of your friends never really were there for anything but themselves and that complete strangers can be the best friends you ever had.
@@JamesBongo It sure is, which is why meeting up with a date is really important. I try to spend more time promoting my music these days. Thanks for your reply and take care.
Don’t try to work out the world before you step foot in it because you’ve already been born into it. Know your values and be sure that they’re good and fair, use your discernment along the way.
I stare at the point above the bridge of the nose. Because so many people get upset about eye contact. I can't/wont do it. It makes me mad, upset. It makes me feel angry about it.I want to fight them when they lock eyes with me. Its a way of adapting. Hope some people can benefit from that if its not posted already.
Understandable. But what I'm also getting from this is that for one to get to know another one must pay particular attention to what topics the other person suggests because underneath the fog of their words is their initial aim and if you can dig through that by enquiring more as to why they said what they said then you are one step closer to making real connection. The battle now becomes you failing to listen attentively while being curious, in most cases people just want to interject with something smart, which is not a good long-term strategy.
Do most people literally, consciously, figure out the aims of people they meet and know, or is it more just intuitively understanding how they might act based on past experience of them and knowing people like them? And do most people often build mental models of how the world must look through the eyes of people they know, or do they usually just get an instinct for what other people value and feel, without the stage of trying to model their perception? (Genuine questions, as I pretty much just go on instinct, but I'm curious about how literal JP's stages are for many people.)
Its astounding how easy it is and yet toxic people scream mute Maybe that person does not want to speak to you because you take too much energy Thankyou JP for yr videos
Eye contact sucks. But so does face blindness. I can read the eyes and see if they are congruent with the rest though. Trust me learn to use eye contact. Its the main non-verbal I intuitively understand.
This is precisely why I avoid strangers eyes when I go out. To let them know that I am 100% NOT interested in interacting with them. Works all of the time! Well ocasionally you run into one of these "homo sapiens" that is terrible at reading others and STILL comes up to you to "talk". But other than that, it works!
@@MESSIMAHJJL1233 he has an academy, they are using the knowing to understand life and use it with science to expand the conscious I believe. Pretty impressive. The Peterson academy. I can only tell that all you ever felt is the truth. and your making all of this just like I am or anyone else. We are all one. We are all God.
Many people are like what you've described. There are always exceptions to everything. I know this because I am exactly the same person with everyone I encounter. I see people I know transform into different personalities with each individual. Should I be concerned about their authenticity?
I pay attention to body language and voice tone, plus one of my best friends is blind so this isn’t for everyone, there’s different types of people out there that are even deeper.
The way you can tell someone is looking at you without you looking at them directly, is because even with the farthest part of the peripheral vision you can see the full whites of their eyes, and if you see that then they are looking at you. Use this wisely.
One of the ways I found out my man was cheating was he suddenly stopped looking me in the eyes when we spoke. After that came blaming me for things I didn't do, and then, comparing me to other women. He didn't know I realized and I caught him in the act. After begging him to stop over 5 times with no change or anything but an " I'm sorry." Sorry isn't action.
Idk man. I always look away cause my culture says that its rude to stare at someone while talking to them. I would look at them for a few seconds, then my eyes would wonder off somewhere else, then back at them, so on. Im still fully listening and paying attention though.
So how does it work if you are blind ? Well ? Learn to think for yourselves people as all theories are biest and nothing other than opinions in somebody else's mind, not yours !!! Live your ! Life ❤❤❤
@@stephenmellor9264 if the person is blind they can't see the reactions of the other person to the faces they give off. When they feel disgust they will show it blatantly and they will have a much harder time hiding it than most people. As for the blind person knowing someone, you can hear it in their tone. I agree on the think for yourself part, however what people think of you is what you think of yourself. So it's actually your opinion of you that they are thinking.
@@woo1818And on top of that the people spamming it, seem to not understand that they’re narcissistic too. There’s just certain people with higher levels of it than others.
Im autistic , i can gleefully connect and say with joy hello to most if not all animals reptiles birds etc, but when i am confronted by a human,... I freeze, i feel instinctively that I sm an unwanted persona, i go outside with my dog, . I see a bird 3:323:32 reptile or mammal and i say hello and ask how they are doing and am ready to chat, however with people im screwed. And it's not for the want of trying. ....WHY?
are like a circuit board" means that, just like a circuit board in electronics, the people or elements within a group are interconnected and rely on each other to function effectively, with each individual playing a specific role in the overall system
Thank you. God says the heart of man is "dispicably wicked" and unknowable. We really can't always see 100% into souls or predict what people will do. That's one of the many reasons we need God.
Relationship have it’s principles, in relationships people have choices and people have mutual understanding. Sometimes I even can’t sit at toilet calmly with my phone on, cause in the morning I hear, try not create CO2, an unwanted not known surveillance from inside the phone is scary and it’s not normal.
Eyes are powerful, in my culture we avoid eye contact. When during an argument someone says to me :" look into mt eyes when you talk to me" I perceive and consider it as micro agression. I wont look strangers in the eyes (unless is flirting with a person I consider attractive), I wont look anyone in the eyes if I dont want to, looking into someone's eyes is reserved for romantic context, yes I am looking at you but not in your eyes. My witch grandma taught me better ( who knows , knows! 😂
0:20 None of that's true?... Most of what he's saying is correct, but to say "none of that's true", regarding the substance of what your conversations are with the person you're trying to connect with, is absurd. I like JP a lot, but one of his biggest flaws is how he tends to over-dramatize things to make them sound absolute and impactful. He could have easily made the same point about the importance of looking at someone's eyes while talking to them, while maintaining the importance of other aspects.
he never said alienate yourself from the conversation dummy, what you're doing here too is kind of an over-dramatization which makes you a hypocrite, but the word of mouth cannot be trusted and even honest people are rarely aware of their own true nature, which means you have to observe the non verbals to truly figure someone out. if you actually read some books (which jordan did) you'd know that between 70% and 93% of communication is non-verbal, and only about 10% is verbal, and there are also other forms than verbal or non verbal.
you're honestly just criticizing him, as if he's supposed to be a perfect man and not many any mistakes or have any imperfections, he's honestly one of the best teachers on the internet but people like you can't live without drama, cheers 🥂
I get your point. I think what He is saying is that it isn’t sufficient enough to understand the person as a whole just by talking about facts or just by talking in general. Yes he said “none of that is true” that being said The truth needs more depth than just spilling words, and that doesn’t help us understand the persons truth if we cling to just what they say. And dramatic conversations that are derive with truth is necessary even we do it subconsciously, for others to connect more and get what we mean (not just logically ) but emotionally as well… we are emotional beings after all. Maybe That’s why we struggle to think. And maybe that’s why your in his RUclips channel as well 😂
It may or may not be hyperbole but people can easily lie and tell someone what they want to hear or say what they think should be said instead of whatever they want to get off their chest
Yes. The Etes have it. But, a bit if a problem if you're short sighted, like me. And you're not wearing your glasses. I have to get up close. So I've learned to compensate using other means and senses and forms of communication. Not just eyes.
❤ thank you for being Jordan ❤ so real ❤ so rare ❤ so needed ❤ I love and live with the Trinity ❤ marriage dysfunctional for 36 years ❤ no exit plans ❤ I love and trust my husband ❤his actions are Christ like ❤ his grooming to be a leader at a young age I believe had a harsh impact on hubby’s emotional well being ❤ hero burn out is his issue this week ❤ my offering to our family has been changed since we met ❤ I’m pretty sure he was taught you don’t work you don’t eat ❤ I know you don’t want my history ❤ I’m doing this more for me ❤ thanks for the space ❤
Explains why communication in social media is do difficult. The partnabout dogs though. I believe animals are much deeper than people give credit. Its more than simply a dog sees you as pack leader. Still the eyes are key. Windows tobthe soul.
When I’m out and about with those closest by me I always make it clear I see you and say hi and try to have situational awareness. Avoiding the people around you in public will make you a target.
@@HarmoniousHiker…..Not been my experience……looking into the eyes of an abuser, has only made them more vicious, as they now ‘see’ that they have my full attention to go red hot mad. Not looking into their eyes tends to defuse them a bit….confuses them. Also, I detest looking at them. I just want to get away.
@@cristinabadea6344 An abused child cannot leave. A woman (especially if she’s got kids) cannot leave her abusive relationship. It’s not that simple. And, then, there is love. I am in an abusive relationship with the world but it’s damn hard to leave because I am in love with life.
How about me tho? I can't hold eye contact sometimes because I'm nervous with who I'm talking to, or I need to concentrate so hard on what I'm thinking about to say that I need to look away
“You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation.” - Plato.
Not actually a Plato quote though :)
@@OboeLatte1
Thanks 😊 I think this is original 🤔
Richard Lingard’s 1696 pamphlet entitled “A Letter of Advice to a Young Gentleman Leaving the University Concerning His Behaviour and Conversation in the World,”
“If you would read a mans (sic) Disposition, see him Game, you will then learn more of him in one hour, than in seven Years Conversation.”
what's your aim pal? is it likes? why lie?
@sroth2021 Inspire the idea to have fun if you want to know someone's character winning and losing and also how they handle a challenge, which is life. You need a good team to endure life's ups and downs, and you might as well have fun.
I didn't lie, I was mistaken thinking it was Plato.
I was happy finding a better answer.
@@sroth2021 Lighten up buddy. You’re a member of the Human Race but who’s winning?😁
The eyes are the window of the soul.
I though it was the Nipple???
Kaskade
Eye the tiger wood.
I'm Sagittarius
@@ochakijwhat?
Ryan Caraveo- pumpkin pie
Looking into the right eyes can change your whole world. You stare at their soul when you look into their eyes. You can see pain, happiness, anxiety, excitement and anger.
Or a mask
..which is also why some of us, who are super sensitive, often avoid looking into people's eyes. It's too much to take in sometimes.
@DolphinsPlayingInAquaMoonlight yes I have this issue lol
right eye from their perspective or mine?
@@ali-cat2029 right eyes, as in the right persons eyes is what I think he meant.
Dr. Peterson is always so good at verbalizing the unspoken truths about human behavior!! The between-the-lines things that describe us as beings, yet most of us can't quite put into words the way that he does.
He's a well spoken person who knows how to communicate and has a head full of knowledge.
Helping the masses
Absolutely !!
Sometimes, not always though
Agreed 1000 percent. It's profound how much he talks about life and struggle and how to overcome them
The Eyes Chico, they never lie.
Also the hips. Hips don't lie.
True. I can read most of people eyes but the hard ones are the nordics, like scandinavian. Very hard sometimes to see through them.
@@BoreasCastel what's with hips?
Hips don't lie, a Shakira song. He was kidding. Nice joke 😅
@@mirosDV A nice joke yes but hips do not lie. A person that cares to about you or what you have to say typically orients their body to face you or moves a bit closer to you.
While I was in a shopping centre, someone caught my eye. Without even thinking, I smiled. A relaxed, casual smile. She didn't know what to do. How to take my smile. I watched her go through what I felt was surprise, oh, someone noticed me, slight embarrassment, then the realisation that a complete stranger smiled at her. Sincerely, with no other expectations. This all went through her mind within a fraction of time. Then, she smiled back. It was lovely. A learning experience for me. I spent a couple of hours smiling randomly at people while walking around, enjoying those that responded positively. A few people didn't react whatsoever, their thoughts elsewhere. And then one or two absolutely scowled at me! I left thinking about the body language, eye contact (or the lack thereof), and the vibes I got from one or two people that rendered them into a dark category all of their own. It had been a very enlightening day. And one I'll never forget.
Thats something really different and unique, i'll try it too!
I am going to try this one day.
Agreed, however, I used to work with young people with autism, and I have learned a lot, non verbal communications, people's energy. I pay attention to someone entire body when they are communicating. Their energy, state of mind, their mood, especially how they interpret words.
They are great teachers.
Thank you! - Ausomely Autistic
What do you mean by ''interpret words''? How they react I suppose, but could you please give me an example?
Most communication is non verbal.
This is often struggle with Autistic people, many have face blindness. However they struggle even more on the telephone, even though they struggle face to face.
I was going to say...I'm autistic and can't look at people when I'm speaking...I physically can't do it. My body pushes it away involuntarily and to override it feels like a violation...
"cause most of the dogs you own don't talk"
I see Dr. Peterson didn't want to exclude Scobey doo
Or Huskies...Didn't want to exclude Scooby Doo *or Huskies
😂
dog’s eye so deep, incredibly honest sooooo kind NO WAY a human ever has such
Dogs don't have the advanced brain of a human brain, human babies give that trusting look as well up until 6 according to the attachment theory while the brain is a sponge
You feel them. You can feel people's intent. You can feel if they are nice or if they are mean. You have their thoughts and you will notice that they aren't yours sometimes, you'll think why am I thinking that? And you'll realize they are their thoughts.
When a foreign person is talking to you, you can understand what they say, you can feel them upset or flustered, you can feel when they have joy and yes you can see it in their eyes but you feel that inside.
When you talk about aim, I really get that. You mentioned it in another video and said the chair is no longer a chair because your aim is the stairs, now the chair is an obstacle. That was so cool that everything we manifest is based off our aim it was a great perspective and helped very much so.
You think you can but some people have become "mean" because they've been dealing with "mean" for years but that isn't who they are away from mean people.
For example, say you take a lifelong farm girl and place her in a highly populated metropolis in a dangerous neighborhood rife with thieves, pimps, rapists, drug dealers, etc. if you met her after a year or two she'd seem different than how you knew her but that doesn't mean she's actually mean, she adapted to her surroundings. Remove her from those surroundings and she'd revert to her baseline niceness. Can't be nice in a high stress situation, gets you exploited.
You're right about thoughts though, if you're empathic you pick up on thoughts that don't belong to you at all. Life situations too apparently.
Exactly
@@NDAsDontCoverIllegalActs
I understand, it's like having kids. I often wonder if mothers were nice, then they had kids and were super stressed and just became mean.
However I know that if someone doesn't feel that they will get shot they won't, if you feel bad about yourself you will do all kinds of stuff to you.
So if that person was meant to leave the farm and adapt to the city then that's what they do, or if the mother has kids that's what they do. If they never wanted to do that and stay "nice" then they wouldn't do that or they would still stay nice.
I would say that all that we manifest is from the product of our environment. If that person left the farm life it is because they had a reason, if a person becomes a mother they often say that their kid gave them a reason to live.
Above all, no one wants to be alone. We often put ourselves into extreme situations for the fact that we try too hard and too fast to not be alone while not feeling that we deserve the best. We eventually teach ourselves though and become more wise through these experiences, or we put ourselves through hell to experience heaven.
I made it so I have to try in life or else the whole world crashes down on me, I'm looking into heaven and hell at the same time and I did that to myself. I know I will succeed, I'm often scared that I won't but that's my drive to do so, I see it as a tool. The me I know I me as is not scared, but the me I am now needs that to become that person.
Control your thoughts, and your actions follow, you have a reason for all that you do.
@@TheLinkThruTime❤
Your last paragraph provides the missing context of this video. Thank you
Whenever someone speaks to me, I hear them. But i ain't listening. I'm too busy focusing on their body language and their eyes. "The eyes Chico, they never lie."
The eyes show all your unspoken desires.❤
...or no desire at all:-))
My eyes wander around when I’m talking because I find a lot of eye contact to be distracting. I’m not intimidated, I just can’t think as clearly when I’m making eye contact.
❣️💯💥❣️
I am the same way.
I spent 21 years in customer service, I don't wanna look at people let alone their eyes lol
Prof Peterson is a precious gift to all Humanity... no evil how ever it shows itself will not change that... Know This evil vs The Divine and Humanity, only ever one outcome.. and May God's Pure Love Bless Us All..
I think Professor Petersen needs to brush up on some facts. Also if he had all his facts straight, zi would show appreciation in thanks but without acolades
To keep my focus on God - and not be distracted by this fleshly earthly evil world.
I know the people I have spent time with very well. Those same people don't and will never know me. They don't care don't listen don't care? Idk but I can tell you after I exposed myself to people I cared about showed me how much they did not care and were self absorbed. I don't trust many people but I trust in God
When I'm listening to someone I am focused on their eyes. When I speak to someone, my eyes wander around as I try to formulate my thoughts. Peterson is correct in paying attention to the eyes when getting to know someone. And when those eyes lock, both souls meet each other. You'll feel it too; and it will either make you nervous, or give you comfort. When you're met with anxiousness, then you need to be very careful with understanding why. A lot of the time the anxiousness isn't coming from the other person, it's coming from yourself. You get a deep introspection about your own insecurities.
The single biggest difference between understanding a character in a movie vs understanding a person in a conversation - in a movie most people have up to 100% of their focus on the character, in a conversation most people have up to 80% of their focus on the person.
Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let him go i did all i could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?
Her name is Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive
@juanruandk8969 & @elladonaldson-lh6nc. What the heck! You don’t manipulate someone to get back in relationship with you! That is not love. If you actually loved them, you would let them make their choices of their own free will. This so not the kind of stuff you want to play around with, in order to get your own way. Your heart will heal. It’s important to break any spiritual strongholds and soul ties that had been made and that will help you let go and feel better.
That's why in some cases privacy is power
what do you mean? please elaborate, sounds interesting.
The eyes are the mirror of the soul.
The Bible teaches us everything
I ow my life to you. Helping people as a hypnose&Regression therapist....I came from very deeply far... Thank you
Given I’m a deep eye, forward sitting, conversationalist,… I’ve frightened most of my kids friends. Now I understand what I was doing. ThankYou Dr Peterson. As always. Clear and enlightening.
This was the most convoluted way of just saying "put yourself in other's shoes if you want to understand them" that I have ever seen, amazing way of making simple things sounds fancy
I purposely avoid eye contact with strangers when I'm walking by them. Have no issues maintaining it if I'm talking to people. I'm guessing this must be a subconscious way of communicating with strangers "Don't approach me".
Same, I don't look at people in streets neither in restaurants
Your focus may be interpreted as intrusive or predatory.
I avoid eye contact too because I can somehow read whatever they’re thinking of me. And sometimes it’s just too much.
Dr Peterson is truly a cut above
I try always to understand biased what everyone feels in and I feel pure to associate with people who are like me
It's observatory thinking like this that makes me love Jordan more..
Bless him LORD❤
Truth! Absolute truth, the eyes tell more than we listen
Love it. I often talk to my hypnosis clients about the LOA. No, not the Law of Attraction, but the Law of Attention.
If you want to truly know the people you thought were your closest friends, associates, and coworkers, just have a financial crisis and see who cares to help. When Jesus taught the story of the Good Samaritan, He was teaching what true human compassion acted like. This explains why most people walk past you as if you aren't there, unless you have something they can gain. They are the religious hypocrites of Jesus' days, who only wanted to be associated with people they could make money off of, not spend money on helping to improve their lives.
No, people may be in a financial crisis themselves without letting you know. People should be able to help with a place to sleep and food while you're there. Lending money to people is reserved to immediate family, who you already know you can trust. If someone has a financial crisis and they got there because of gambling or drugs, no one should just give them more money. Delusional take my guy.
@@sp0r26 You can help somebody through a financial crisis without lending them money. It's called being there for them when they need you. My car broke down earlier this week, I didn't have the money to fix it, and I needed to get to school that day to take my lab final. Several people that I hadn't even asked for help pulled out the stops to help me get through the day when all I wanted to do was break down.
Wait until you get into deep shit and who busts out their cutlery. You will always find that most of your friends never really were there for anything but themselves and that complete strangers can be the best friends you ever had.
I am always been an eye woman myself, but the eyes can also be deceptive.
Rarely, even good actors
@@CHDean This reply seems incomplete.
@@gwynnielsen5081 How so? Even good actors are rarely deceptive?
Body language is important
@@JamesBongo It sure is, which is why meeting up with a date is really important. I try to spend more time promoting my music these days. Thanks for your reply and take care.
I'm mind blown. I wish I could get to the entire speech or extract. This topic is very interesting
Don’t try to work out the world before you step foot in it because you’ve already been born into it. Know your values and be sure that they’re good and fair, use your discernment along the way.
I stare at the point above the bridge of the nose. Because so many people get upset about eye contact. I can't/wont do it. It makes me mad, upset. It makes me feel angry about it.I want to fight them when they lock eyes with me. Its a way of adapting. Hope some people can benefit from that if its not posted already.
Genius.
I honestly think he is. I saw him describe his artwork about music to Dr. Oz and I was like: that's it, he's one of those brains.
Understandable. But what I'm also getting from this is that for one to get to know another one must pay particular attention to what topics the other person suggests because underneath the fog of their words is their initial aim and if you can dig through that by enquiring more as to why they said what they said then you are one step closer to making real connection. The battle now becomes you failing to listen attentively while being curious, in most cases people just want to interject with something smart, which is not a good long-term strategy.
You are so observant, and looking at yours I have made my deductions.#respectDP
Great title, spot on.
Most valuable in our closest relationships.
so deeep so true watching this with a feminst right now and she agrees the eyes are crazy love th ebit about dogs!!!!
Do most people literally, consciously, figure out the aims of people they meet and know, or is it more just intuitively understanding how they might act based on past experience of them and knowing people like them?
And do most people often build mental models of how the world must look through the eyes of people they know, or do they usually just get an instinct for what other people value and feel, without the stage of trying to model their perception?
(Genuine questions, as I pretty much just go on instinct, but I'm curious about how literal JP's stages are for many people.)
Its astounding how easy it is and yet toxic people scream mute
Maybe that person does not want to speak to you because you take too much energy
Thankyou JP for yr videos
The thing that comes to my mind is the difficulty with eye contact when you’re on The Spectrum.
Eye contact sucks. But so does face blindness. I can read the eyes and see if they are congruent with the rest though. Trust me learn to use eye contact. Its the main non-verbal I intuitively understand.
Practice eye contact in the mirror! Napoleon practiced hours in front of the mirror
This is precisely why I avoid strangers eyes when I go out. To let them know that I am 100% NOT interested in interacting with them. Works all of the time!
Well ocasionally you run into one of these "homo sapiens" that is terrible at reading others and STILL comes up to you to "talk".
But other than that, it works!
Insight can be a frustrating and isolating trait to have in abundance.
hey is there any books and litteratature to understand such concept more deeply, i would like to learn more.
@@MESSIMAHJJL1233 he has an academy, they are using the knowing to understand life and use it with science to expand the conscious I believe. Pretty impressive. The Peterson academy.
I can only tell that all you ever felt is the truth. and your making all of this just like I am or anyone else. We are all one. We are all God.
NOT 1 PERSON IN THIS WORLD- REALLY KNOWS - ANOTHER PERSON - EACH ONE OF US - IS DIFFERENT - WITH OTHER PEOPLE - THAT'S THE TRUTH !!!
I am the walrus, coocoo-a-choo
Many people are like what you've described. There are always exceptions to everything. I know this because I am exactly the same person with everyone I encounter. I see people I know transform into different personalities with each individual. Should I be concerned about their authenticity?
I pay attention to body language and voice tone, plus one of my best friends is blind so this isn’t for everyone, there’s different types of people out there that are even deeper.
The way you can tell someone is looking at you without you looking at them directly, is because even with the farthest part of the peripheral vision you can see the full whites of their eyes, and if you see that then they are looking at you. Use this wisely.
Thank you for sharing an expanded perspective of the Soulful eyes. 🙂
One of the ways I found out my man was cheating was he suddenly stopped looking me in the eyes when we spoke. After that came blaming me for things I didn't do, and then, comparing me to other women. He didn't know I realized and I caught him in the act. After begging him to stop over 5 times with no change or anything but an " I'm sorry." Sorry isn't action.
From which contribution/video is this extract taken? Please indicate the source.
Idk man. I always look away cause my culture says that its rude to stare at someone while talking to them. I would look at them for a few seconds, then my eyes would wonder off somewhere else, then back at them, so on. Im still fully listening and paying attention though.
God bless you mr peterson🙏
Great video and also very much informative ❤
Two things come into my mind :
- about perspective
- that eyes are the window to the heart
Where’s this full lecture?
God bless you. Dr. Peterson.
So how does it work if you are blind ? Well ? Learn to think for yourselves people as all theories are biest and nothing other than opinions in somebody else's mind, not yours !!! Live your ! Life ❤❤❤
Biased
@@stephenmellor9264 if the person is blind they can't see the reactions of the other person to the faces they give off. When they feel disgust they will show it blatantly and they will have a much harder time hiding it than most people.
As for the blind person knowing someone, you can hear it in their tone.
I agree on the think for yourself part, however what people think of you is what you think of yourself. So it's actually your opinion of you that they are thinking.
I was thinking that. I have had many blind friends and acquaintances. Or so sight impaired they couldn't see your eyes well.
You're Genius.
I believe that the other is an enigma that can never be known because all attributes and identities are just projections.
Yeah my words have driven me into the ground. I’m not that smart! What’s their aim? However, I am still true!The eyes are the seat of the soul!
The eyes are ‘the windows of the soul’( an wise old saying). I often think people who wear ‘shades’ are hiding their souls for some reason.
Or maybe it’s a sunny day
Some of us are light sensitive. Others are blind. Don't be quit to snap judgments.
@marisamartin3664 So why do Gangsters all wear Shades? Just wondering.
Narcs pay attention to themselves by not looking at you.
I swear, every few years the internet finds a new disorder to spam. Schizo, ocd, adhd, autistic, narcissist.
So profound
They usually do that when there are many other around. When alone they look deeply into the eyes.
@@woo1818And on top of that the people spamming it, seem to not understand that they’re narcissistic too. There’s just certain people with higher levels of it than others.
Narcs look at you without blinking, the stare
The best storyteller
Thank you ❤
JP the king of trivia
…and intimate wisdom
😂
That's one of the things I hate about adhd. It's painfully near impossible for me to give good eye contact AND concentrate at the same time
Im autistic , i can gleefully connect and say with joy hello to most if not all animals reptiles birds etc, but when i am confronted by a human,... I freeze, i feel instinctively that I sm an unwanted persona, i go outside with my dog, . I see a bird 3:32 3:32 reptile or mammal and i say hello and ask how they are doing and am ready to chat, however with people im screwed. And it's not for the want of trying. ....WHY?
The eyes are the windows of the soul - I get it. But it’s not always so clear cut, if someone is just looking at you, like normal eye contact?
are like a circuit board" means that, just like a circuit board in electronics, the people or elements within a group are interconnected and rely on each other to function effectively, with each individual playing a specific role in the overall system
"most of your dogs don't talk"
*Husky shaking*
True discernment comes only from the Holy Spirit .
Thank you. God says the heart of man is "dispicably wicked" and unknowable. We really can't always see 100% into souls or predict what people will do. That's one of the many reasons we need God.
Does anyone know the music in the background?
I ❤ your videos!!😊
Any tips for people on the spectrum who have a difficult time with eye contact?
Sounds like the judicial system, the blindfold, see no justice.
Relationship have it’s principles, in relationships people have choices and people have mutual understanding.
Sometimes I even can’t sit at toilet calmly with my phone on, cause in the morning I hear, try not create CO2, an unwanted not known surveillance from inside the phone is scary and it’s not normal.
Eyes are powerful, in my culture we avoid eye contact. When during an argument someone says to me :" look into mt eyes when you talk to me" I perceive and consider it as micro agression. I wont look strangers in the eyes (unless is flirting with a person I consider attractive), I wont look anyone in the eyes if I dont want to, looking into someone's eyes is reserved for romantic context, yes I am looking at you but not in your eyes. My witch grandma taught me better ( who knows , knows! 😂
GOD BLESS YOU!!!!! YOU ARE SUCH A TREASURE IN THIS WORLD!!!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH MR. PETERSON!!!!!!!!
0:20 None of that's true?... Most of what he's saying is correct, but to say "none of that's true", regarding the substance of what your conversations are with the person you're trying to connect with, is absurd. I like JP a lot, but one of his biggest flaws is how he tends to over-dramatize things to make them sound absolute and impactful. He could have easily made the same point about the importance of looking at someone's eyes while talking to them, while maintaining the importance of other aspects.
he never said alienate yourself from the conversation dummy, what you're doing here too is kind of an over-dramatization which makes you a hypocrite, but the word of mouth cannot be trusted and even honest people are rarely aware of their own true nature, which means you have to observe the non verbals to truly figure someone out. if you actually read some books (which jordan did) you'd know that between 70% and 93% of communication is non-verbal, and only about 10% is verbal, and there are also other forms than verbal or non verbal.
you're honestly just criticizing him, as if he's supposed to be a perfect man and not many any mistakes or have any imperfections, he's honestly one of the best teachers on the internet but people like you can't live without drama, cheers 🥂
I get your point. I think what He is saying is that it isn’t sufficient enough to understand the person as a whole just by talking about facts or just by talking in general. Yes he said “none of that is true” that being said The truth needs more depth than just spilling words, and that doesn’t help us understand the persons truth if we cling to just what they say. And dramatic conversations that are derive with truth is necessary even we do it subconsciously, for others to connect more and get what we mean (not just logically ) but emotionally as well… we are emotional beings after all. Maybe That’s why we struggle to think. And maybe that’s why your in his RUclips channel as well 😂
It may or may not be hyperbole but people can easily lie and tell someone what they want to hear or say what they think should be said instead of whatever they want to get off their chest
The eyes tell all, very quickly
What is their aim?? I will always remember that now!
Gosto da música de fundo...😌
É pena não terem colocado o nome dela.😔
Yes. The Etes have it. But, a bit if a problem if you're short sighted, like me. And you're not wearing your glasses. I have to get up close. So I've learned to compensate using other means and senses and forms of communication. Not just eyes.
Jordan ? Talk about the psychology of nondual awareness please
❤ thank you for being Jordan ❤ so real ❤ so rare ❤ so needed ❤ I love and live with the Trinity ❤ marriage dysfunctional for 36 years ❤ no exit plans ❤ I love and trust my husband ❤his actions are Christ like ❤ his grooming to be a leader at a young age I believe had a harsh impact on hubby’s emotional well being ❤ hero burn out is his issue this week ❤ my offering to our family has been changed since we met ❤ I’m pretty sure he was taught you don’t work you don’t eat ❤ I know you don’t want my history ❤ I’m doing this more for me ❤ thanks for the space ❤
Which is safer, AI or one/one conversations?
I've seen pretty people who were so souless and would try to sabtoage you. Steal your identity.
Explains why communication in social media is do difficult. The partnabout dogs though. I believe animals are much deeper than people give credit. Its more than simply a dog sees you as pack leader. Still the eyes are key. Windows tobthe soul.
Perfect 👍❤
When I’m out and about with those closest by me I always make it clear I see you and say hi and try to have situational awareness.
Avoiding the people around you in public will make you a target.
Not every individuals has same characters like yours ..some come from different cultures
This is all stuff I already know but how do I apply it to my life
I have a tendency to not look into the eyes of someone who hurts me, abuses me, or who has shown me that they are in some fashion, an @$$hole.
It depends if you want aggressive confrontation or not.
Respectful and compassionate eye contact can tame aggression
@@HarmoniousHiker…..Not been my experience……looking into the eyes of an abuser, has only made them more vicious, as they now ‘see’ that they have my full attention to go red hot mad. Not looking into their eyes tends to defuse them a bit….confuses them. Also, I detest looking at them. I just want to get away.
Look into their eyes and leave. 😊
@@cristinabadea6344 An abused child cannot leave. A woman (especially if she’s got kids) cannot leave her abusive relationship. It’s not that simple.
And, then, there is love. I am in an abusive relationship with the world but it’s damn hard to leave because I am in love with life.
How about me tho? I can't hold eye contact sometimes because I'm nervous with who I'm talking to, or I need to concentrate so hard on what I'm thinking about to say that I need to look away
This just blew my mind
I didn't get it before, but i understand now. Hmthey were keeping their flig alive by shhiting on other people. Isn't that right, passion guy 😱💪
How about people wi4h a lazy eye or a strabismus ?
ITS A GIFT OF GOD.....CFJ