Correction: Park Seo Joon (Sentient Plank of Wood) is not a member of BTS. I heard he was from a video I watched during my research but did not double check. I apologize to BTS for suggesting they had anything to do with this movie. I will endeavor to learn from my mistake and do better research in future. The Despot always eats his Ls. Thanks for watching! (I stand by my statement that the role should have gone to Billy Corgan).
They just stole the 'flying into a sun' bit from Dark Phoenix in X-Men, pretty sure the Phoenix flies directly into the sun to get rid of her 'Phoenix powers' can't remember if this was in the X-Men comics or the animated TV shows though, perhaps both?
Park Seo Joon is actually a very good actor. I know he’s astonishingly awful here but I place it on Disney sucking out all his talent and him having to play in language he doesn’t speak or even know enough. You can check clips from dramatic scenes in Itaewon Class or his korean movies though I doubt you’re really interested. Either way thanks for the review. I write stories myself and can’t express enough how I enjoy your style of analyzing characters and plot points, cruelly realistic and logical.
I thought it was Seo Joon's face I saw in these short clips - I still couldn't bother looking up the cast to check who the poor victim was that took this role. I'm guessing he's in this for a paycheck. The guy is a decent actor. Oh, how the hollypoop corrupts 😢
i'm looking forward to hearing this review twice at least. You may also have to clip the Blade 4 synopsis as i just heard it and it turned me inside out with laughter.
It is not about the money friend, it is only propaganda for The brainwashing needed to destroy the greatest civilization the world has ever benefited from.
There's a book out there called 'How to Write Science Fiction' put out by Writers Digest, and it talks about Rubber Science, which is the idea that any science fiction has to have forms of science that, though they are fiction, combining different elements of real studies of science or pseudo-sciences, combining them at will, they still need to have rules, and often these rules of the fictional science are what can shape the story and allow the writer the opportunity to explore the human condition with the conflicts that arise from the rules. What the Marvels are failing to do is make their fictional sciences have rules. No verisimilitude, no real conflict, just flashy CGI.
Was nice back when science fiction was actually _science_ fiction, and was written mostly to speculate on the possibilities with actual scientific fact. Not just fantasy in space with a different sort of magic claiming to be "science". Seriously, most sci fi is actually just space fantasy. Micheal Crichton wrote science fiction, literally.
There's a huge irony, they cast Park Seo-Jin, a Korean actor who doesn't sing or dance, in the role of a guy who sings and dances. If only Korea had a huge industry of professional singers and dancers with famous people to draw from....
It seemed like you might not have been joking that you thought it was a member of BTS playing that Korean guy, but it wasn't--they really should have cast a singer and dancer.
Yet another bafflingly ass-backwards decision in a movie project full of them. The people at Marvel Studios are just flailing in the dark at this point, utterly disconnected from audience feedback, industry wisdom and common sense.
@@isaacpriestley yeah, I shut the review off about 5 or 10 minutes after. It would have been funny if he was just calling a pretty boy Korean actor "guy from BTS", but it seems like it was just a lie inserted into the review so he could go on a rant about musicians being actors, and ultimately to make fat jokes about lizzo. Which I'm fine with, call her fat and gross if you want, but there was no basis for it in this review in the slightest. And then he said people used to listen to good music, and compared BTS to smashing pumpkins. Again, The thought of bald ass Billy Corgan being Captain Marvel's husband is a funny image, but the whole logical basis of that comparison is the contrast with music of today I guess? Wouldn't it make more sense to compare BTS to like backstreet boys, or whatever boy band Robbie Williams was in? And how bad faith and misleading is it to use "a bullet with butterfly wings" as an example of smashing pumpkins music. You know one of the most meek, soft and whiny bands of the 90s. He uses literally the one song they have that is slightly hard edge and screamy. To make the whole point work he must have had to spend a long time thinking about the perfect song from the late 90s with kind of a hard edge. Like "hmm, bittersweet symphony? No no no. Jumper from third eye blind? No, that won't work. Steal my Sunshine? No......maybe Believe by cher?" The 90s were pretty soft musically, as far as mainstream radio hits are concerned. He had to pick one song out of hundreds of hit songs from the 90s to make his point work. Sorry for the rant, but I had to turn his review off shortly after this because it would be psychotic to listen to someone pontificate about poor writing, when this is how poorly they write their points. This man must be quite limber after how hard he was stretching.
The fact Park Seojoon is actually one of the member’s friends, who yk actually sings, dances and can act well💀. Tho honestly I’d rather him take one for the team than anyone else be stuck with this project on their resumé. Tho I’m sure this guy was joking.
Disney and Marvel's idea of "fighting" seems to involve a lot of unnecessary jumping and spinning to make it seem like something is happening. Acrobatics isn't fighting. I think someone needs to tell them that.
Unfortunately that's been a trope since the beginning of time. I'm so tired of the lazy nonsensical spinning attacks. Yes that includes George Lucas's movies too although Maul did it rather well.
Whoever the fight choreographer for Captain America: Winter Soldier was, needs to stay on cause the fights there were the best of the MCU (in my opinion)
Which is just baffling considering they have literal comic books and access to comic book artists via Marvel to do combat storyboards. The fight scenes honestly should be top fucking notch with this chemistry of creativity, but nope.
My favorite part was Monica explaining her powers: "I can see light!" Congratulations, Monica. You can see light. That was the moment when I realized that literally NOBODY involved with this movie cared at all about what they were doing. Not the writers, not the so-called "Director", and certainly not the actors.
@@alexanderayotte8867Yeah, even most legally blind people can still see light. This is what you get when you treat everyone and their feelings as special and protection worthy.
That is a hilarious line. The only time I've heard something similarly stupid was a trailer for Mass Effect: Andromeda that listed "water" and "ice" as two seperate resources.
@@Diablo_Himself to kick hot vampire ass in revealing lether outfit. Not like any popular vampire movie was about anything else than ´´i want to f*ck that vampire´´
It's actually pretty hard to make a male villain compelling in a female led Marvel movie because males are not allowed to beat females in any way at any time.
This is why these kinds of movies are boring because the people behind them are interested in the " message". Not so much the story, plot and/or character. We want entertainment, not your feelings and politics.
It's actually kind of disturbing the amount of female characters that are displaying genocidal and/or sociopathic tendencies being portrayed as heroic recently.
I was hoping you’d cover this movie! I took my mom for her birthday because she’s just a content consumer, and even she hated this it. “Where are all the men?!” she exclaimed. She said at least the 1st Captain Marvel had Judd Law, heart throb. Unless you’re a lesbian (I’m guessing), women don’t want to just see an all female cast either.
There were men... effeminate, Asian men. And effeminate, black men. And effeminate brown men. But as far as I could tell, there wasn't a single white male with a speaking part in the entire thing. I'm tired of arguing with Liberals about this kind of bigoted stupidity. It's time to let our wallets make the point for us.
dont you see that you/we are the audience they want to attack? they have made it obvious that this is how they want to strike because for them its not about the money they dont care if they lose heaps of money their main objective is simply to be SEEN or "included" and especially for you to listen and hear thier "message". Thier main objective is for your eyes to find creatures like Lizzo "attractive"
@@thelobster7277 your Point was „mostly male readers“ Guess what Mr Einstein Lord of the Rings fanbase is mostly man…. Fk idiot. Don’t try to make a Point when your just a braindead pos
The biggest enemy of globalisation are strong nations. Diversity hiring helps to weaken those nations from within. This is the only reason why all global companys are pushing this agenda so hard. Globalisation is more important for them than money.
It's just nice to see them admit, outright, that "you're being a white man" is a cardinal sin in their religion. They want us to stop being, which, in this context, literally means they want us to die. Glad they admit it. And admit that they suffer from crippling mental health disorders.
Yes it’s pretty funny. Granted, there are a ton of scam bots these days so maybe one of the hidden replies is them. Reporting those is the only acceptable interwebs tattle tale
Correction: The actor portraying Prince Yan is Park Seo-Joon, who is not a member of BTS. Although he is a decent Korean actor known for his work in various Korean series, his performance in this particular role is truly lacking depth. Sometimes, there are actors who can only deliver performances effectively in their native tongue, and based on this movie, it appears that Park Seo-Joon might fall into that category.
Sentient plank of wood is actually very charming and funny in Korean TV. I felt a brief flicker of interest when I heard he’d been cast, but it died when I realized I had no faith that current Marvel Studios would be able to write itself out of a paper bag, much less produce an interesting script for him
Korean TV does have different standards, but in this case being really good in Korean doesn't mean that you will be instantly a good actor in another language. He doesn't sound like he really speaks strong English, and how do you compellingly act in a role for a language you can communicate in at best. It might be different if the role required him to demonstrate, to _act out _ his role, but it's just speaking mostly, and was a weak script to start with. And of course not all actors are meant to play all roles. You can be really excellent in some roles, that doesn't mean you are capable of playing a dignified nobleman for example. Cheech was a fairly good actor in his role, but imagine him being cast as a 18th century Spanish aristocrat, or Incan emperor? Although now that I say that I would have been glad to watch him try. Who knows, maybe he has untapped potential? Wonder what the hell he's doing these days anyway.
He speaks Korean usually too doesn't he? I knew instantly he could speak English, but not super well. It's very obviously just a conversational language for him. Reminds me of the joke Gabriel Iglesias does about the super intimidating mexican fighter speaking english like a child trying to be tough.
The issue being he can talk clearly in his own language, but cannot speak in English, meaning it's worse than casting a non actor for an English language film, just to pander to the Korean market
Carol Danvers was in the military - risk of "not returning" comes with the job. It would seem really immature from adult Monica Rambo to hold that against Carol, especially as Monica is in similar line of work now and no doubt has seen a couple of colleagues "not returning".
@@twrcrew8852true, but pilots and astronauts are among the military jobs where it's definitely understood that not coming back could be part of the job.
7:20 I totally agree, they literally chose her because she is Tom's partner or Tom told her he was going to see a casting and that's why she got the role
You know hearing all these bad ideas is actually inspiring to me because it can push you to think in new ways you had it before. When you brought up about how scientifically horrible the idea of Dobbins just dumping a sun in their solar system was a bad idea in detail made me think of how that could be twisted around to work where in Universe this is acknowledged and this being extension of Dar benz's Madness. A Madman eager to pursue a solution that would not only destroy another world to work but destroy their own world in the process it being completely counter-intuitive to their goals, to be terrifying. Does this concept have a name? To take a bad idea and redeem it by making a bad idea in universe as well?
What bugs me about the "song as language" concept is that in musicals, the songs are non-diegetic. The characters aren't literally singing to each other or the audience (unless it's an actual performance in-universe), the songs are just representations of the feelings and motivations of the characters conveyed to the audience using music. Which happens to be one of the reasons why musicals don't work so well as live-action movies.
The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals is a fantastic exception. All the songs are diegetic, because the characters are being mind controlled by an alien hive mind, forcing them to perform choreographed musical numbers. It’s on RUclips.
@@Film_Sushi Exceptions don't make it a rule. Other than that, _Sound of Music_ has a mix of non-diegetic and diegetic numbers, with the latter being the majority. It also wasn't a copy-paste from the original stageplay, with is why it worked so well. _Singin' In The Rain_ is also an example of this, as well as _Chicago._ _Moulin Rouge_ also worked because it embraced the campiness of its premise. When musicals try to become gritty-realistic, that is where it falls apart. Take _Les Miserables_ and _Cats_ as examples for that.
The thing that made Thanos a threat was the fact that he wasn't just a leader that sits back and lets his men do the work and gets beaten easily when he has to fight himself. He gets involved when he has to and when he does, shit gets done Thanos knew how to fight, he was a straight menace in a fight and you know that the first scene he's in He didn't have power, he had access to power, which made him an even bigger threat, especially when you know his plans with that power. In Infinity War, he was mostly just using the stones to fight, then in Endgame, he's using his own fighting talents to run hands with the Avengers In both films, he's extremely tough to take down That basically shows you that he's not just a tough bastard because he has powerful tools with him, he's able to fight by himself We aren't just told "he's really powerful, we can't win" they said he was strong, but seeing him actually fight Vs someone telling you about him is a completely different story Maybe not a perfectly written villain, but definitely a better one
the lack of chemistry between brie larson and teyonah parris was because they had on set beef because teyonah parris is upset that monica rambeau should have been the mcu captain marvel like she was in the comics
12:37-13:00 I appreciate your positive remarks of Iman Vellani. When a film is overall terrible, it's easy to paint all aspects of it as terrible. I'm glad to see some credit given to an actress who genuinely did the best she could on such a sinking ship.
It's sad to realize there are still people who have that passion for superhero movies and roles, but few of them are either allowed to be in such movies, or they are crushed by the experience. It's sort of like the stereotypical case of a boy who loves sports until his peaked-in-highschool dad makes him absolutely loathe it due to dad's overbearing attempts to live vicariously though his son.
If I would be paid this much at this age I would also perform cheerfully and vigorously. What is the point for praising sovereigns they are FKIN PAID FOR?
Hey GOTG3 was great, No Way Home was fun outside of ruining the MCU Spider-Man’s chance of ever having his most important story (the Osborne’s/Goblins and Octaviois) or most of his biggest villains.
Also- Danvers' ship bearing a strong resemblance to a misshapen chubby with tiny, tiny testicles says rather more than I think the filmmakers intended.
At 38:30 Speaking of Blade not being in a hurry to leave, I knew someone who once fell into a vat of whiskey. Four men jumped in to save him but he fought them off and drowned instead.
You know, I know he was just shooting the shit, but I would unironically pay to go see a Blade/Underworld crossover movie. Hell, that literally would've been one of the biggest movies of 2012! The biggest Underworld movie made $62.3 million; this would've easily made $100 million. Why the f*ck didn't they ever make that movie?!
Nostalgia Critic brought up the comedy problem in his Mamma Mia review. If comedy is based on misery, Hollywood has proven its cowardice in that it REFUSES to be mean to women in its movies.
Hollywood also shows their cowardice with rarely making female characters evil while also having relatable or empathetic aspects to them. Amy Dunne from Gone Girl is a rare example. She's evil yet incredibly smart, gets cheated on, and has a brilliant "cool girl" monologue that women universally relate to. Now that's an interesting female character with depth, which we need more of.
@@ipodtouch5963 Eh, more like that their cowardice comes from the fact that they can't make comically evil villainess characters of any moral and ideological spectrums, Hollywood stops being able to self-deprecate itself even on making fun of their own turfs/comfort zones (hence one of the biggest reasons we never got parody/spoof genre of movies anymore nor even well-written and well-directed movies akin to Rush Hour 2), at most we're going to get mediocre/mid sequels that maybe got 2-3 good things while either being pale imitations at most or at worst just falls off (Sometimes it's not even due to just recent aforementioned bucket of contrived "woke" factors, it's more of the inbreeding of creativity occurring in Hollywood until they use clutch and padding like political correctness to make things worse recently, yet even if it's stripped out, it would took them time until their nepotism needs to fall off and take someone with both talent and interesting creative prowess honestly, I'm pretty sure that one needs actual capabilities of scientific/STEM degrees before able to jump into the creative industries and forms breakthroughs with it)
Disney is now trying to get the Russo brothers to come back for the next two Avengers films. Besides the fact that Disney cancelled the actor that was supposed to be their big bad villain, I doubt there are any directors that can salvage the trash heap that the MCU has become. They’ve stopped hiring directors and started “casting” them instead. “A black nonbinary lesbian Eskimo dwarf that has never seen a camera? Give her $200 Million and send her off to shoot the next MCU film or D+ show.” Short of literally retconning everything post-Endgame and letting the Russo brothers run the MCU entirely without any DEI nonsense, there is nothing short of a miracle that would get fans interested in the MCU again. The only good thing we got was channels like this entertaining us with their accurate reviews of the garbage they had to watch so we didn’t have to.
Just like how Secret Invasion introduced the MCU's version of Perfect Cell, The Marvels film has officially made Carol Danvers into the MCU's Vegeta. If the intense gravitational force and heat of the Sun can't even burn her armor off ( thanks, Marvel, for not even giving us a nude and flustered Carol), there is nothing in the MCU that could stop her, save for a Black Hole, and the most that would do is trap her for all eternity.
A big problem with the way female superheroes are written is that they think just making them powerful is enough when that's not even close to being enough. Saitama and Superman for example are stupidly powerful, but the story uses that to turn their drama into a moral and emotional one. They explore what it feels like to have every fight end early with one punch, or what it means to be the strongest being alive and to be a symbol of hope for people Captain Marvel however uses none of that, and just goes "look, she powered up a sun, she's awesome right?", and think that is enough to make her as impactful as Superman
Exactly. You look at Spider-Man and people forget that this teenager has stupid super human strength, but the reason we love that character is because he doesnt use it. Superman ruins any space he takes up because he is unbeatable, same with Captain Marvel. Endgame the stakes were high, Thanos was losing so he rained choas in a last ditch effort, but before its too late bumba bumba here comes captain marvel to instantly wipe out that threat. Fucking snooze fest, and then they show 8 shockingly under powered females that are supposed to "help" captain marvel, after she did that? Fk off writers. Seriously though, when you think of good female super heros, you think of Black Widow, Wanda and possibly some others, but what they all have in common is their femininity, without that they are basically just ugly, weaker men. Widow has cool flips and shit, and brings the team down to earth and Wanda went crazy over the love of her children, both equally important female traits that are lost on most female characters. Echos Love for her father may have put her on a path of revenge, but she was ultimately a pawn for super powered female generational magic, which blows, because I really wanted her to be like Black widow, but ended up boring af. Ms Marvel doesnt fight to save her family, in fact her family was saving her majority of that fight, which is very odd and not feminine at all, Rambou has no female traits whats so ever and Captain Marvel is a board as usual. Nothing female in these characters at all, which makes them unrelatable to women and girls, and not at all interesting to men. When men say Women dont know what they want, or are indecisive, this is what we mean, you dont want these characters really, but you think you do until you have done it.
You ate getting too much credit to one punch man because neither of these were mentioned in manga, original webcomic or anime. There is no debate like that, even fight with one eyed alien overlord was very artificial and superficial in that regard. So don't make philosophy to something that was drawn for creeps and pretending to be deep work of art 😅
@@zawarudo1041that's true. Saitama's character is symbol for justice in manga and not for heroism. His character is represented as unconditional good work put forth for vague purpose. Story of opm does not revolve around Saitama, he is used as scape goat when villain's get increasingly dangerous. He is in story to represent strength and that's all.
I don't think the comparison with Disney's Aladdin is really fair when it comes to villains gaining the ultimate power seconds before defeat. If you play the fight in its entirety, Jafar had the upper hand the entire time until Aladdin tricked him into making the critical mistake that ended the fight. After all, we're talking about a resourceful and clever guy who spent several days talking to a genie who told him about the restrictions he has to abide by, facing a power-hungry maniac who only knows genies are powerful. Aladdin successfully exploited Jafar's flaw by reminding him of the genie being the source of his powers and capable of taking them all away, and Jafar didn't think for a second about the consequences of becoming a genie himself. It's a classic victory of cunning against raw power.
Sun temperatures are not a problem for a blonde woman, she will fly there at night. But seriously. Fun fact is hitting a Sun is not that easy. Anything starting from Earth has inherent speed about 30km/s perpentual to E-S axis. It's hard enough to leave Earth gravity which only requires 11km/s. It's actually easier to hit the Sun from Earth by taking the opposite direction, leaving the Sol system and sling back, then "shooting" something from Earth directly. But as for Sun gravity - 28g - that's nothing for cpt. Marvel. As even if she maintained this kind of acceleration it would take 1.2 days to travel from Earth to Sun alone. More if the intention was to not to hit the star at full speed about 3000km/s. But she wouldn't. Space navigation was not part of the set given her by a writing team. So she would probably head directly into the Sun, missing it for sure due to that initial perpentual speed vector.
1 hour and 22 minutes of this golden review is why I am thankful that Disney made this movie! Without the movie we wouldn't have this review! Thx Iger!
So, I take it you only want to watch bad movies just for the fun of the negative reviews of them? How bad do you want bad movies to be if your philosophy is that worse movies make for better reviews that are more entertaining than the movies they criticize?
45:26 Not only was Randy Quaid trying to protect his family when he took out the aliens, but he had a personal, dark and REAL reason: revenge. "Hello Boys, I'm BACK!" was SO thrilling in theaters because after all the abuse he went through at the hand of the Xenos. All the trauma of people not believing him back on Earth and claiming he was crazy. All of this came together in a moment of cathartic justice at the finale. His arc completed in the most brilliant way possible as he managed to somehow save the world -- _as a side mission._ Excellent reference, Despot.
He might have been crazy but he died thinking he gets revenge and redemption. He also developed a martyr complex that ends up helping him because he doesn't hesitate when his missile won't fire.
On the topic of boss fights: As a DM, one of the most important aspects to a combat encounter is the scene. I may not tell my players directly, but when I tell them things, describe things to them, or if they as for any more information regarding the area, I fully expect them to use their heads and use the location to their advantage such as throwing a chair, flipping a table, burning the stairs, climbing the rafters… because I want them to feel like heroic, I want them to be engaged. This is such a basic thing I cannot believe that the final boss fight is so shallow, the environment itself is a character too. I love Jackie Chan movies for this very thing, he uses the whole scene to his advantage. How do you mess up a fight scene?
24:17 This line reminded me of a joke someone once made: "When god was giving out intelligence, you were sitting on the toilette, but when he gave out stupidity did you go and get a second portion"
Something interesting I noticed about women in combat is that we're often much, much better at being sneaky and quiet while getting the drop on opponents than we are at outright assaulting them. I noticed that when my friend and I were talking about operators in R6- we were discussing realism, and Caveira seemed to be the most realistic of the female ops. She's light and her specialty is being quiet so she can ambush attackers, knock them down with a silenced weapon, interrogate them to reveal their teammates' positions, and then kill them. She's scary as fuck to play against, especially if you're still new to the game. I offhandedly suggested that all female ops be a bit more like her, with lighter arms but being much faster and quieter than most of the males (and also having fewer of them since about half the roster is women), and that made all of my friends upset. They'd hate to have an entire team of Cavs because she's so frustrating to play against, even by herself. It would be unbalanced as all hell, but I think giving all of the female ops more potential to be sneaky could be very interesting. I wish that movies took that female aptitude for quiet, sneaky, and cunning in attacks more seriously. It's extremely satisfying to have a Mission Impossible style sneak session end with the quiet assassination of enemies, or to go wrong and force the perpetrator to find a creative escape route. Not every encounter needs to end with an all-out brawl. Power doesn't always come from physical strength. Having sequences that are quiet but thrilling keeps movies interesting, and it seems like fewer and fewer movies today have those quiet but intense scenes. They just want to have people, particularly women, beating the shit out of the baddies. It's boring. I'm really tired of everything being the exact same fight. That's why I don't really care for mainstream superhero movies anymore; I much prefer the thoughtful, tension-filled deconstructions of superheroes like The Boys (at least, the first season- haven't watched the second yet). There's plenty of fighting in that, but there's a balance with people sneaking around and avoiding getting into fights. There's also a demonstration of the power that women can have that doesn't involve physicality, and I find that much more interesting than having unrealistic fights where a 90 pound child can beat the shit out of a 6'4" roided out gym rat every single time they cross paths. My strength as a woman doesn't come from my ability to beat the shit out of people. It comes from my ability to navigate social situations, be cunning, and having a network, among other non-physical things. It's not bad to have the occasional badass woman that could realistically take on a man, maybe even a couple of them at the same time if she's skilled enough, but that has to be the exception instead of the rule. The vast, vast majority of real women can't do that. Making it seem like that's what we're supposed to do and we're weak, useless pieces of trash if we can't isn't empowering. It's degrading. Seems like no one in media got that memo, unfortunately.
Correct, women are better at stealth and subtlety. And when you fail or are caught, you immediately collapse emotionally into blubbering babies, invoking your little girl voices hoping that will get you mercy. Much of the time it works, until you encounter the one man who's immune to your blubbering. That man you label "misogynist" and scream for all the other men to save you from him. It's an effective, time-tested method of getting your way--but now men are hip to how fake you all are and are behaving accordingly.
I wholeheartedly agree on this one. I've never played the game, but I would take this from a different angle. In this case, books. Like, I don't know, but the latest story I've been writing on, I made sure to make a point out of the fact that women are not as physically capable (it's fantasy, but fantasy is no excuse for bat shit writing and having no rhyme or reason to your strength system is bat shit writing). I like to ground physical aspects in reality, which means that, as long as physical training remains a thing to be necessary, a woman will not overpower a man with the same training that she had. Sorry, honey, your opponents won't run into war with nothing in their hands. Either way, I had someone tell me that it was backwards thinking, especially since the story is set in an alternative victorian era world and there's mostly men in power, which "should not be the case, because fantasy". If I let women fight (if no stealthing is possible), it usually comes down to what the character can do - is it fantasy or not, and if so, what does it grant - but I usually go with the swift fighting style. For example: Don't use long and heavy-ass swords, use short ones with a long grip, so you can prop them against your forearm if you have to block. Otherwise, long blades could get hit on the longer end, ripping that shit out of your hands. Getting in close fast, dosging instead of blocking, and going in for blind spots, with short weapons that you can pressure on with your body weight, without having to waste energy trying to swing them.
Absolutely true! Men and women have different "strengths" so play into those. Make women be more cunning, emotionally mature, be able to read situations better, etc. Instead of making them as physically strong as men, which is nearly an impossibility.
*”The Marvels is the worst movie of 2023!”* Yeah…but only because there aren’t any more major Disney releases for the rest of the year that it could risk losing the title to (since Disney is their own biggest rival in the *“worst movies ever”* competition)… Disney just constantly keeps one-upping themselves with each new release (which is actually quite an impressive achievement)!! 🤣🤷♀️
@@suzygirl1843 This movie was absolute garbage. The flash and Black Adam had a few points that could be considered entertaining (Michael Keaton and Pierce Brosnan were both good in these films), but this movie had absolutely nothing worth watching. There is absolutely nothing to praise in The Marvels.Nothing.
Iman Vellani looks like she's having an absolute blast. It's unfortunate that she's in such a bad movie; I hope she gets other roles that allow her to really show off her excitement and acting ability to the fullest extent before she turns into a jaded actress who's just there for the money. It really shows when actors don't care about the roles they're playing- Iman deserves to have a shot at being the best actress she can be while she still has the drive. Props to her for her performance.
Yeah, props to Iman, she is the only positive in this entire abomination. The utter shiet she's sourounded by makes her stand out even more, so hopefully that'll help her career, even though this movie sucked.
Yep unfortunately I think she’s being used as a token middle eastern girl for shitty writers to throw in for diversity/virtue signaling reasons, instead of having writers who give a shit writing good roles for her. That’s Disneys formula though, throw some absolute low effort shit or remake together and throw in some tokens who deserve much better roles and stories to get other virtue signalers raving about it, defending it, and throwing awards at it.
I think I finally understand modern storytelling. It's all withdrawals and no deposits. Nothing goes into the bank, but the script takes out whatever it wants at any time.
Been looking forward to this for awhile now. Glad to finally see it! Strange that I enjoy watching a deep dive on a film and not watching the absolute tripe film itself. Keep up the great work Despot.
Are you telling me that the follow up to a billion dollar movie, produced during a phase of awesomeness from a company making bank did poorly?!? My heavens. *[ Sarcasm]*
I love the fact that your review is so thorough and you leave no mistake unanswered. You actually make the movies entertaining without having to watch them cause let's face it, we'd put a bullet in our heads halfway through these movies they are so bad. But, your reviews are the same runtime and satisfying. Please please please review the newer Evil Dead movie. My wife and I made it 15 mins before we determined that it was a huge waste of time.
Ohhh the villain arc. That’s one thing I particularly enjoyed from the latest Spiderverse movie. Spot started as this comical little criminal that was totally unthreatening and did a 180 as the movie progressed and he accumulated more power. Loved it.
"2023 will be remembered as the year the superhero movie died." 2023 might be remembered as the year Hollywood died, as even the majority of big-budget non-superhero movies were flops too.
It may have died in 2023, but it was on its death bed since after Endgame. There may have been hope in Spiderman and GotG3, but that has long since passed and unfortunately the new Echo series is exactly the same bs strong female cus female strong messaging we've been getting. They couldnt just leave her as a rage filled, revenge assassin, nah she has magic now.
I like how they have Monica say she can see light, when she should've said she can see raw energy and its flow. Ya know, like it was literally shown to us in Wandavision (I say energy instead of light because she could also see Agathas magic roots lining the walls to the cellar. So in short the powers are as following Captain Plank is an energy source, and can expel it at people (and apparently reignite a fucking sun) Ms. Marvel can harness energy into solid matter Monica Ramboring can see and absorb energy and then use it till she is drained This took me 5 minutes to understand better than a team of professional writers
David Bowie, Barbra Streisand, Cher, Will Smith, Jared Leto, Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin and on and on and on. Love this dude's videos, but his comment was the dumbest comment I may have ever heard
Removing Carol from Endgame would let characters do some things they should have done in her place. Rocket should have been the one to rescue Tony and Nebula, Thor could have Bifrosted him to Nidavellir and he could take the pod from there. At most it should have been Rocket and Thor together. This would have given the movie time to show him learning that all his friends were dead. Thor could have taken out Thanos's ship, it would be a nice gesture after all the Fat Thor jokes. Instead CM just sort of showed up and did stuff.
I had similiar thoughts with Kraglin rescuing Tony with Rocket later joining him . Carol Danvers' presence felt forced while Nebula & Rocket fitting in with the Avengers well
Rambeau looked so interesting in WandVision and i really wanted to learn more about her character and was curious how it'll continue, but The Marvels really never caught my attention.
@MollieLolly You can make Dar-Benn work with minimal effort if you just admit Captain Marvel is the villain (which she _is_) and have this be a story about Dar-Benn being the protagonist trying to save her/his people from a space tyrant who thinks she's a god. There; I just saved The Marvels in literally the least effort possible.
Interestingly enough, I watched the Marvels and Blue beetle on the same day (I was feeling particularly masochistic that day) and was given two distinct flavors of bad. The Marvels was much more incompetently made, but I didn’t feel anything beyond mild bemusement while watching it. I also (conveniently) missed the portion involving sentient plank of wood, because I decided to take a bathroom break just before they got to the singing planet. Blue beetle on the other hand had some high points I enjoyed, but it also annoyed me a lot more. It definitely felt like the kind of movie I’d seen a million times before, so I was waiting impatiently for the characters to catch up and stop going through the same superhero tropes every other movie had done (they never 👎 )
I laugh out loud every time Nixon pops up to says "that means it is not illegal" Excellent work! Thank you for suffering through this movie to make us laugh.
The only reason the villain, whatever tf her name is, was cast is because she's Tom Hiddleston's baby mother. That's it. You can see by her terrible acting. At least it doesn't stand outwith the rest of the awful acting.
The "wide eyed, teeth bared" villain part is particularly unfortunate for this actress because of that gap in her front teeth. I can't take her seriously when she's trying to be menacing, and flashes those chompers. Edited for typos.
I don't really see what the issue with them being unknown actors is, plenty of good actors aren't huge stars. Also, the actors aren't even really unlikable they're just portraying characters people don't like. And as the above comment said a feminist director isn't inherently a bad thing. Seriously I don't like this movie but complaining that the actors are "unknown" or that the director is a feminist is just so stupid.
The insertions of "the steacks" is killing me 😂😂 Awesome review and critics, with a lot of good points that obviously remind me of the Drinker or the Reaper... 💪😎
I saw Blade when it came out. When the sunglasses get tossed up in the air and he catches them to put them back on people CHEERED. Man I miss good movies in the theater.
Independence Day wasn't the best movie, quite a few flaws in it, but damn it had to many good, inspiring, heroic, heart-tearing scenes. Also no stupid diversity stuff, just people being people.
An important element at play, too, is that it's sincere. The movie itself and everyone involved in making it seem to care about it's characters and story as much we're supposed to, so it's easy to be... manipulated (for lack of a better word). That actually used to be common practice but it feels like that's becoming a lost art for some reason.
@@ASpooneyBardI swear movies in the past, even the ones that could be considered bad from a critical standpoint , were more enjoyable because at least they were sincere with what they were presenting to the audience.
@@ASpooneyBardThat'd because people at large have became more cynical, sarcastic and fake as social media had an increasingly bigger impact on society.
There are so many criticisms of The Marvels in this essay, but no mention that Capt Marvel found a home world for the Skrulls and Fury should have been furious after the events of Secret Invasion. I have to wonder what was left on the cutting room floor.
I've just seen The Marvels but there is something that has been confusing me. In Secret Invasion, literally a few months ago, a faction of the Skrulls tried to ignite WW3 on Earth...so now in The Marvels, Valkyrie takes them all from the colony to New Asgard, but didn't the President of the US in the MCU sign a bill to treat Skrulls as a hostile threat? The US in the MCU knows about New Asgard, don't they? Surely they'd figure out the Skrulls are all there now and doesn't that mean the Skrulls are in even more danger? When does The Marvels take place? Is it before Secret Invasion or after?
Captain Marvel was overpowering God mode Thanos in End Game, but a girl boss with a grill gave Karen, I mean Carol, all she can handle. OK film. That'll due.
This video should be required viewing by all directors, producers, writers and studio executives before any movie is allowed to begin production. And BTW: The kids that lost out on your being a teacher to them is a tragedy. What an incredible educator for young minds you'd have been. Fortunately, you still educate to VERY LARGE classes, only via RUclips now. You're one of the best minds on here. The analysis in this video is brilliant!
All videos like this should be. There is absolutely no excuse for the mediocrity being displayed in the film industry right now. Especially since these people are supposed to be "the best" in the business.
Those kids are fortunate. This idiot is yakking on about a b level 90 minute movie for 83 minutes. The movie isn't influential nor was it a big hit. So this video is like using an AR 15 on an ant. His complaints are nitpicking.
I think the writers were so worried about AI taking the jobs because they have been using it instead of actually putting in to work of making a good original script from scratch
Dude you can watch everything everywhere all at once and see how incredibly capable a woman can be in a fight, they just consistently fail to make it believable
@@miturbinizdurdy Not to put down the movie but you could make a looong list of movies they should take notes from. Really they should head back to middle school Shakespeare at this point.
or watch the live action re movies, cgi yes but Alice isn't a Don't need no man kind of character, because Men save her and protect her often in the movies.
"How in the name of Harvey Weinstein's chastity did this get made?" God dammit man, i was drinking water when you said that and i almost choked to death trying not to spit it out XD
The singing prince isn't from BTS. He's a well-known South Korean Kdrama actor (who's actually really talented if you watch Fight for My Way, What's Wrong With Secretary Kim, or Itaewan Class). Maybe the issue here is the language barrier or the fact that he's not really a singer/dancer by trade. Its sad, because he's actually an amazing actor (see the shows I listed above).
![[FULL] RETROSPECTIVE : Final Fantasy Tactics](/img/1.gif)
Correction: Park Seo Joon (Sentient Plank of Wood) is not a member of BTS. I heard he was from a video I watched during my research but did not double check. I apologize to BTS for suggesting they had anything to do with this movie. I will endeavor to learn from my mistake and do better research in future. The Despot always eats his Ls. Thanks for watching! (I stand by my statement that the role should have gone to Billy Corgan).
Thanks. Anyway, I hope you can do videos on Slender Man and Netflix One Piece respectively since you've seen them and have your own thoughts on both.
They just stole the 'flying into a sun' bit from Dark Phoenix in X-Men, pretty sure the Phoenix flies directly into the sun to get rid of her 'Phoenix powers' can't remember if this was in the X-Men comics or the animated TV shows though, perhaps both?
Park Seo Joon is actually a very good actor. I know he’s astonishingly awful here but I place it on Disney sucking out all his talent and him having to play in language he doesn’t speak or even know enough.
You can check clips from dramatic scenes in Itaewon Class or his korean movies though I doubt you’re really interested.
Either way thanks for the review. I write stories myself and can’t express enough how I enjoy your style of analyzing characters and plot points, cruelly realistic and logical.
I thought it was Seo Joon's face I saw in these short clips - I still couldn't bother looking up the cast to check who the poor victim was that took this role.
I'm guessing he's in this for a paycheck. The guy is a decent actor.
Oh, how the hollypoop corrupts 😢
He's Itaewon Class guy
I’ll never watch The Marvels, but I’ll happily watch the Despot talk shite about it for an hour and a half, twice! 😂👌
Same here
i'm looking forward to hearing this review twice at least.
You may also have to clip the Blade 4 synopsis as i just heard it and it turned me inside out with laughter.
Same here. Watching this again at work.
samesies
@@michaelfields7088 So you're gossipers????
Over half a century, thousands of comic books with hundreds of great story lines and Disney comes up with pure dog sh*t.
For real. You would think they would have you know- DONE THE FREAKING KREE-SKRULL WAR! It's like they hate money.
It is not about the money friend, it is only propaganda for The brainwashing needed to destroy the greatest civilization the world has ever benefited from.
Guess they didn't even bother to read some of the comics
@@riojohn-c8r Neither do most of you who bitch these movies out.
I'm happy I grew up when things were pure we are heading towards an abyss 🎉
What Scrubs taught me was that when everybody around you is singing and dancing then that's either a brain aneurysym or psychosis.
And in Buffy it is a dancing demon, or in Lucifer it is God being a cheeky bugger who likes music.
@or in TGWDLM it’s an invading alien hive mind
its guy love
That was a great Scrubs episode.
Captain Marvel, so powerful she can reignite a planet's sun...gets knocked out multiple times by a woman with a staff and a bracelet. 😭
And Captain Marvel is a guy!
Another gender swap, for no reason.
@@lonestar6709
Yeah they hoed his character tbh.
They hoed his kids characters in a way to.
There's a book out there called 'How to Write Science Fiction' put out by Writers Digest, and it talks about Rubber Science, which is the idea that any science fiction has to have forms of science that, though they are fiction, combining different elements of real studies of science or pseudo-sciences, combining them at will, they still need to have rules, and often these rules of the fictional science are what can shape the story and allow the writer the opportunity to explore the human condition with the conflicts that arise from the rules. What the Marvels are failing to do is make their fictional sciences have rules. No verisimilitude, no real conflict, just flashy CGI.
Was nice back when science fiction was actually _science_ fiction, and was written mostly to speculate on the possibilities with actual scientific fact. Not just fantasy in space with a different sort of magic claiming to be "science". Seriously, most sci fi is actually just space fantasy. Micheal Crichton wrote science fiction, literally.
There's a huge irony, they cast Park Seo-Jin, a Korean actor who doesn't sing or dance, in the role of a guy who sings and dances. If only Korea had a huge industry of professional singers and dancers with famous people to draw from....
It seemed like you might not have been joking that you thought it was a member of BTS playing that Korean guy, but it wasn't--they really should have cast a singer and dancer.
Yet another bafflingly ass-backwards decision in a movie project full of them. The people at Marvel Studios are just flailing in the dark at this point, utterly disconnected from audience feedback, industry wisdom and common sense.
@@isaacpriestley yeah, I shut the review off about 5 or 10 minutes after. It would have been funny if he was just calling a pretty boy Korean actor "guy from BTS", but it seems like it was just a lie inserted into the review so he could go on a rant about musicians being actors, and ultimately to make fat jokes about lizzo. Which I'm fine with, call her fat and gross if you want, but there was no basis for it in this review in the slightest.
And then he said people used to listen to good music, and compared BTS to smashing pumpkins. Again, The thought of bald ass Billy Corgan being Captain Marvel's husband is a funny image, but the whole logical basis of that comparison is the contrast with music of today I guess? Wouldn't it make more sense to compare BTS to like backstreet boys, or whatever boy band Robbie Williams was in?
And how bad faith and misleading is it to use "a bullet with butterfly wings" as an example of smashing pumpkins music. You know one of the most meek, soft and whiny bands of the 90s. He uses literally the one song they have that is slightly hard edge and screamy.
To make the whole point work he must have had to spend a long time thinking about the perfect song from the late 90s with kind of a hard edge.
Like "hmm, bittersweet symphony? No no no. Jumper from third eye blind? No, that won't work. Steal my Sunshine? No......maybe Believe by cher?"
The 90s were pretty soft musically, as far as mainstream radio hits are concerned. He had to pick one song out of hundreds of hit songs from the 90s to make his point work.
Sorry for the rant, but I had to turn his review off shortly after this because it would be psychotic to listen to someone pontificate about poor writing, when this is how poorly they write their points.
This man must be quite limber after how hard he was stretching.
Park Seo Joon can sing, he even does tracks for several of his dramas. But, yes, he is predominantly an actor.
The fact Park Seojoon is actually one of the member’s friends, who yk actually sings, dances and can act well💀.
Tho honestly I’d rather him take one for the team than anyone else be stuck with this project on their resumé. Tho I’m sure this guy was joking.
Disney and Marvel's idea of "fighting" seems to involve a lot of unnecessary jumping and spinning to make it seem like something is happening.
Acrobatics isn't fighting. I think someone needs to tell them that.
Unfortunately that's been a trope since the beginning of time. I'm so tired of the lazy nonsensical spinning attacks. Yes that includes George Lucas's movies too although Maul did it rather well.
Whoever the fight choreographer for Captain America: Winter Soldier was, needs to stay on cause the fights there were the best of the MCU (in my opinion)
At least the prequels were flashy, what's this one's excuse
It’s the whitewashed version of the mystical wu shu stuff from Chinese cinema.
Which is just baffling considering they have literal comic books and access to comic book artists via Marvel to do combat storyboards. The fight scenes honestly should be top fucking notch with this chemistry of creativity, but nope.
My favorite part was Monica explaining her powers: "I can see light!" Congratulations, Monica. You can see light. That was the moment when I realized that literally NOBODY involved with this movie cared at all about what they were doing. Not the writers, not the so-called "Director", and certainly not the actors.
I must be a superhero,too! Everything I see is light 😂
Ahh yes seeing light, that very esoteric ability that everyone but the entirely blind can accomplish
@@alexanderayotte8867Yeah, even most legally blind people can still see light.
This is what you get when you treat everyone and their feelings as special and protection worthy.
That is a hilarious line. The only time I've heard something similarly stupid was a trailer for Mass Effect: Andromeda that listed "water" and "ice" as two seperate resources.
@@billjacobs521 They can't help it their faces were tired.
Damn you. Now I’m fixated on the idea of a Blade/Underworld crossover movie…
...in which Kate Beckinsale joins up with Wesley Snipes to kick vampire ass?
@@Diablo_HimselfPretty sure Blade would hate Selene, it'd be like Blade 2 and teaming up with those other vampires.
@@Diablo_Himself
That sounds awesome.
@@Diablo_Himself to kick hot vampire ass in revealing lether outfit. Not like any popular vampire movie was about anything else than ´´i want to f*ck that vampire´´
@@iona2225But he warmed up to the badass vampire lady at the end.
It's actually pretty hard to make a male villain compelling in a female led Marvel movie because males are not allowed to beat females in any way at any time.
Well, I think this is a woman anyways, but who knows these days honestly. It might identify as a furby for all i know.
So, SM sex is no longer an option in a Hollywood movie, lol?
This is why these kinds of movies are boring because the people behind them are interested in the " message". Not so much the story, plot and/or character. We want entertainment, not your feelings and politics.
@@mezzbyou are delusional
The whole setup for the Marvels is I've hide feminist agenda. You must be either clueless or full of bad faith to pretend it's not a case
It's actually kind of disturbing the amount of female characters that are displaying genocidal and/or sociopathic tendencies being portrayed as heroic recently.
Hey you need DEI for those roles, and they seem to play them better than a man?
Yall weren't D riding Thanos?... we really gonna lie huh
😂😂😂 Adele Hitler , her struggle
Easily explained when you realize they're all self-inserts of psychotic writers
@@bendavisyoutube1068Thanos was very clearly in the wrong and no one was “D riding” him as if he was justified.
Honestly, laughing at this movie is like fighting with a cripple:
Yeah, you technically won, but it stopped being exciting 19 punches ago
Good thing is he isn't laughing, just spitting facts.
Lol, Filip!!!
Hey, provided the cripple trash-talked and hit out because 'I'm a cripple, you can't hurt me!', then it deserves more crippling.
"CRIPPLE FIGHT!!!!!"
At least they tried standing up for themselves.
I was hoping you’d cover this movie! I took my mom for her birthday because she’s just a content consumer, and even she hated this it. “Where are all the men?!” she exclaimed. She said at least the 1st Captain Marvel had Judd Law, heart throb. Unless you’re a lesbian (I’m guessing), women don’t want to just see an all female cast either.
Lesbian here, nope. The best actors should be placed in their most compatible roles.
The only man missing that needed inclusion is Blue Marvel
Nobody wants an all female cast, especially if it’s trash writing.
"Where are all the men?'
The Marvels writing team interpretation: "So you hate yourself."
There were men... effeminate, Asian men. And effeminate, black men. And effeminate brown men. But as far as I could tell, there wasn't a single white male with a speaking part in the entire thing. I'm tired of arguing with Liberals about this kind of bigoted stupidity. It's time to let our wallets make the point for us.
10:55 - men use insults that are not genuine to socialise with each other, women use complements that are not genuine to socialise with each other.
Who would ever seriously think it would be a good idea to have all female writers for films whose fan base (comic book readers) is 95% male?
It defies logic
dont you see that you/we are the audience they want to attack? they have made it obvious that this is how they want to strike because for them its not about the money they dont care if they lose heaps of money their main objective is simply to be SEEN or "included" and especially for you to listen and hear thier "message". Thier main objective is for your eyes to find creatures like Lizzo "attractive"
Uhhh what? Lord of the Rings the Movies had 2/3 female writers 😵💫 i hate the woke bs Just as much as you do. But your Point is litterly pure bs
@@SaltareObscurum is lord of the rings a comic book?
@@thelobster7277 your Point was „mostly male readers“ Guess what Mr Einstein Lord of the Rings fanbase is mostly man…. Fk idiot. Don’t try to make a Point when your just a braindead pos
"You're being a white man." is my favourite compliment of 2023.
The biggest enemy of globalisation are strong nations.
Diversity hiring helps to weaken those nations from within.
This is the only reason why all global companys are pushing this agenda so hard. Globalisation is more important for them than money.
It's just nice to see them admit, outright, that "you're being a white man" is a cardinal sin in their religion. They want us to stop being, which, in this context, literally means they want us to die. Glad they admit it. And admit that they suffer from crippling mental health disorders.
but when i say you`re being a NI- i get banned from the server
3 replies, all hidden. 🤔
Yes it’s pretty funny. Granted, there are a ton of scam bots these days so maybe one of the hidden replies is them. Reporting those is the only acceptable interwebs tattle tale
Correction: The actor portraying Prince Yan is Park Seo-Joon, who is not a member of BTS. Although he is a decent Korean actor known for his work in various Korean series, his performance in this particular role is truly lacking depth. Sometimes, there are actors who can only deliver performances effectively in their native tongue, and based on this movie, it appears that Park Seo-Joon might fall into that category.
I literally just commented the same thing, should’ve seen your comment first.
Thanks, I've posted a correction.
"Why have you come?"
Maybe with enough practice he can improve, but that remains to be seen.
@@wrath231Soz, it just felt too good I couldn’t help it.
Sentient plank of wood is actually very charming and funny in Korean TV. I felt a brief flicker of interest when I heard he’d been cast, but it died when I realized I had no faith that current Marvel Studios would be able to write itself out of a paper bag, much less produce an interesting script for him
Korean TV does have different standards, but in this case being really good in Korean doesn't mean that you will be instantly a good actor in another language. He doesn't sound like he really speaks strong English, and how do you compellingly act in a role for a language you can communicate in at best. It might be different if the role required him to demonstrate, to _act out _ his role, but it's just speaking mostly, and was a weak script to start with.
And of course not all actors are meant to play all roles. You can be really excellent in some roles, that doesn't mean you are capable of playing a dignified nobleman for example. Cheech was a fairly good actor in his role, but imagine him being cast as a 18th century Spanish aristocrat, or Incan emperor? Although now that I say that I would have been glad to watch him try. Who knows, maybe he has untapped potential? Wonder what the hell he's doing these days anyway.
He speaks Korean usually too doesn't he?
I knew instantly he could speak English, but not super well. It's very obviously just a conversational language for him.
Reminds me of the joke Gabriel Iglesias does about the super intimidating mexican fighter speaking english like a child trying to be tough.
The issue being he can talk clearly in his own language, but cannot speak in English, meaning it's worse than casting a non actor for an English language film, just to pander to the Korean market
Park Seo-joon was never in BTS but he might actually be a sentient plank of wood 😂
Carol Danvers was in the military - risk of "not returning" comes with the job. It would seem really immature from adult Monica Rambo to hold that against Carol, especially as Monica is in similar line of work now and no doubt has seen a couple of colleagues "not returning".
as a veteran of 13 years, I should mention that not all prior service members (most i'd say) have ever seen anything traumatic. rather the opposite.
@@twrcrew8852true, but pilots and astronauts are among the military jobs where it's definitely understood that not coming back could be part of the job.
They can keep spending 300 million per movie so I can keep enjoying reviews like this.
Disney didn't learn any lessons from an all female Ghostbusters film.
What lesson was there to learn?
They successfully pushed through more propaganda.
You think they care about money?
Oh you naive summer child.
7:20 I totally agree, they literally chose her because she is Tom's partner or Tom told her he was going to see a casting and that's why she got the role
The Prince, Park Seo Joon, he isn't a kpop star, he's an actor. I'm shocked they DIDN'T actually get a kpop star instead.
That blade section legitimately sounds like the perfect late 90s vampire movie that I would pay thousands of dollars to watch ONCE
Unfortunately we know the new Blade movie will be complete Gurl power crap
This! We need this movie right now in order to get the taste of MCU out of our collective mouths.
@@brianmurphy250Would be so funny if it was recast with an overweight black woman as Blade
@@paulvontarsus729you have my vote for Blade Lizzo
@@deputyporker2856Oprah Blade!
Even the Terminator was kinder and more human than Captain Marvel. What a great comparison, lmao.
Yes...
But was the terminator...
CURRENT YEAR?
You know hearing all these bad ideas is actually inspiring to me because it can push you to think in new ways you had it before. When you brought up about how scientifically horrible the idea of Dobbins just dumping a sun in their solar system was a bad idea in detail made me think of how that could be twisted around to work where in Universe this is acknowledged and this being extension of Dar benz's Madness. A Madman eager to pursue a solution that would not only destroy another world to work but destroy their own world in the process it being completely counter-intuitive to their goals, to be terrifying. Does this concept have a name? To take a bad idea and redeem it by making a bad idea in universe as well?
It’s not that they don’t understand their own character; the writers don’t understand how normal humans actually function
what is shocking to me is that not a single actor at any point said "guys, i won't do that. it is really bad"
A famous actor (I wish I could remember who) once said "I'm trained to be an actor, not a movie star".
Someone just needs to say stop to the woke, and that man is Johny Dep, and he’s dropped Hollywood
When the Commissar says "JUMP!", you jump.
Everyone is afraid of being cancelled.
You can’t afford to do that in a professional setting, especially in Hollywood. Contracts, blacklists, being outcasted, yeah no.
I love how Despot casually drops like 15 plots to movies that we'd actually fking pay to watch. 🤣
That Blade one sounded pretty cool.
What bugs me about the "song as language" concept is that in musicals, the songs are non-diegetic. The characters aren't literally singing to each other or the audience (unless it's an actual performance in-universe), the songs are just representations of the feelings and motivations of the characters conveyed to the audience using music. Which happens to be one of the reasons why musicals don't work so well as live-action movies.
Hold my beer, said Sound of Music, LOL.
This is why Charlie and the chocolate factory is the best musical movie. The songs make sense in universe.
The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals is a fantastic exception. All the songs are diegetic, because the characters are being mind controlled by an alien hive mind, forcing them to perform choreographed musical numbers. It’s on RUclips.
@@Film_Sushi Exceptions don't make it a rule. Other than that, _Sound of Music_ has a mix of non-diegetic and diegetic numbers, with the latter being the majority. It also wasn't a copy-paste from the original stageplay, with is why it worked so well. _Singin' In The Rain_ is also an example of this, as well as _Chicago._ _Moulin Rouge_ also worked because it embraced the campiness of its premise.
When musicals try to become gritty-realistic, that is where it falls apart. Take _Les Miserables_ and _Cats_ as examples for that.
@@lmahu6627 Sounds like you know what you are saying so I just remark - well done, yup. :)
The thing that made Thanos a threat was the fact that he wasn't just a leader that sits back and lets his men do the work and gets beaten easily when he has to fight himself.
He gets involved when he has to and when he does, shit gets done
Thanos knew how to fight, he was a straight menace in a fight and you know that the first scene he's in
He didn't have power, he had access to power, which made him an even bigger threat, especially when you know his plans with that power.
In Infinity War, he was mostly just using the stones to fight, then in Endgame, he's using his own fighting talents to run hands with the Avengers
In both films, he's extremely tough to take down
That basically shows you that he's not just a tough bastard because he has powerful tools with him, he's able to fight by himself
We aren't just told "he's really powerful, we can't win" they said he was strong, but seeing him actually fight Vs someone telling you about him is a completely different story
Maybe not a perfectly written villain, but definitely a better one
the lack of chemistry between brie larson and teyonah parris was because they had on set beef because teyonah parris is upset that monica rambeau should have been the mcu captain marvel like she was in the comics
Yeah well Captain Marvel failed in the MCU as much as she has in the comics, so either way its source material.
Disney: Dont you tell me to smile
Audience: Okay
The Marvels Bomb
Disney: 😢
Not smiling now eh Disney?
12:37-13:00
I appreciate your positive remarks of Iman Vellani. When a film is overall terrible, it's easy to paint all aspects of it as terrible. I'm glad to see some credit given to an actress who genuinely did the best she could on such a sinking ship.
It's sad to realize there are still people who have that passion for superhero movies and roles, but few of them are either allowed to be in such movies, or they are crushed by the experience. It's sort of like the stereotypical case of a boy who loves sports until his peaked-in-highschool dad makes him absolutely loathe it due to dad's overbearing attempts to live vicariously though his son.
If only Iman was thin, hot and generally speaking, fucking amazing. This - will end careers, mark my words... or not. LOL.
If I would be paid this much at this age I would also perform cheerfully and vigorously. What is the point for praising sovereigns they are FKIN PAID FOR?
"So, naturally, they made the incorrect decision-" really just encapsulates every single post-Infinity War choice that Marvel has made.
Hey GOTG3 was great, No Way Home was fun outside of ruining the MCU Spider-Man’s chance of ever having his most important story (the Osborne’s/Goblins and Octaviois) or most of his biggest villains.
@@anthonycowan3481 I'll give you that No Way Home was fun, if questionably written. GOTG3 doesn't even have that going for it.
Sad truth: Marvel movies have become so unremarkable at their best that I can only glean entertainment from Marvel movies at their worst...
Also- Danvers' ship bearing a strong resemblance to a misshapen chubby with tiny, tiny testicles says rather more than I think the filmmakers intended.
What are you talking about? Enjoy leftist propaganda leaflet number 7589 while drinking your soy latte consoomer.
always have been
At 38:30 Speaking of Blade not being in a hurry to leave, I knew someone who once fell into a vat of whiskey. Four men jumped in to save him but he fought them off and drowned instead.
Legend
You know, I know he was just shooting the shit, but I would unironically pay to go see a Blade/Underworld crossover movie. Hell, that literally would've been one of the biggest movies of 2012! The biggest Underworld movie made $62.3 million; this would've easily made $100 million. Why the f*ck didn't they ever make that movie?!
@@MarvinPowell1Dude! That's a fookin' good idea 💡
Nostalgia Critic brought up the comedy problem in his Mamma Mia review. If comedy is based on misery, Hollywood has proven its cowardice in that it REFUSES to be mean to women in its movies.
Man that review was so good! I'm glad you mentioned it, I'm gonna watch it tonight. Preciate it
Hollywood also shows their cowardice with rarely making female characters evil while also having relatable or empathetic aspects to them. Amy Dunne from Gone Girl is a rare example. She's evil yet incredibly smart, gets cheated on, and has a brilliant "cool girl" monologue that women universally relate to. Now that's an interesting female character with depth, which we need more of.
@@ipodtouch5963 Eh, more like that their cowardice comes from the fact that they can't make comically evil villainess characters of any moral and ideological spectrums, Hollywood stops being able to self-deprecate itself even on making fun of their own turfs/comfort zones (hence one of the biggest reasons we never got parody/spoof genre of movies anymore nor even well-written and well-directed movies akin to Rush Hour 2), at most we're going to get mediocre/mid sequels that maybe got 2-3 good things while either being pale imitations at most or at worst just falls off
(Sometimes it's not even due to just recent aforementioned bucket of contrived "woke" factors, it's more of the inbreeding of creativity occurring in Hollywood until they use clutch and padding like political correctness to make things worse recently, yet even if it's stripped out, it would took them time until their nepotism needs to fall off and take someone with both talent and interesting creative prowess honestly, I'm pretty sure that one needs actual capabilities of scientific/STEM degrees before able to jump into the creative industries and forms breakthroughs with it)
well I know what I'm watching later
@@Abraham-xi9ep Eh, I'd rather watch his wall review than the marvels.
As a korean about Seo Jun's acting... i am totally agree... he was just used as tool of directors Eye Candy and also i dont listen to K-pop either...
봐 졌어서 감사합니다.
@@DespotofAntrim your welcome, i am sick and tired of Korean suck theirselves...
I had no idea Dhar Mann was so evil.
Disney is now trying to get the Russo brothers to come back for the next two Avengers films. Besides the fact that Disney cancelled the actor that was supposed to be their big bad villain, I doubt there are any directors that can salvage the trash heap that the MCU has become. They’ve stopped hiring directors and started “casting” them instead.
“A black nonbinary lesbian Eskimo dwarf that has never seen a camera? Give her $200 Million and send her off to shoot the next MCU film or D+ show.”
Short of literally retconning everything post-Endgame and letting the Russo brothers run the MCU entirely without any DEI nonsense, there is nothing short of a miracle that would get fans interested in the MCU again. The only good thing we got was channels like this entertaining us with their accurate reviews of the garbage they had to watch so we didn’t have to.
All credit to you for making long form videos that are so good they pull me in, in spite of having no interest in seeing the movie they are about.
Just like how Secret Invasion introduced the MCU's version of Perfect Cell, The Marvels film has officially made Carol Danvers into the MCU's Vegeta. If the intense gravitational force and heat of the Sun can't even burn her armor off ( thanks, Marvel, for not even giving us a nude and flustered Carol), there is nothing in the MCU that could stop her, save for a Black Hole, and the most that would do is trap her for all eternity.
Carol Danvers trapped eternally in a black hole sounds like a win to me!
Trap her for eternity? Let's GoFundMe this!
Don’t compare this person to the absolute peak character that is the flawed and truly strong vegeta
@AzureWolf168definitely over 9000
@@odtheman1as offensive of a comparison it may be, I find it to be the most apt.
A big problem with the way female superheroes are written is that they think just making them powerful is enough when that's not even close to being enough. Saitama and Superman for example are stupidly powerful, but the story uses that to turn their drama into a moral and emotional one. They explore what it feels like to have every fight end early with one punch, or what it means to be the strongest being alive and to be a symbol of hope for people
Captain Marvel however uses none of that, and just goes "look, she powered up a sun, she's awesome right?", and think that is enough to make her as impactful as Superman
Exactly. You look at Spider-Man and people forget that this teenager has stupid super human strength, but the reason we love that character is because he doesnt use it. Superman ruins any space he takes up because he is unbeatable, same with Captain Marvel. Endgame the stakes were high, Thanos was losing so he rained choas in a last ditch effort, but before its too late bumba bumba here comes captain marvel to instantly wipe out that threat. Fucking snooze fest, and then they show 8 shockingly under powered females that are supposed to "help" captain marvel, after she did that? Fk off writers.
Seriously though, when you think of good female super heros, you think of Black Widow, Wanda and possibly some others, but what they all have in common is their femininity, without that they are basically just ugly, weaker men. Widow has cool flips and shit, and brings the team down to earth and Wanda went crazy over the love of her children, both equally important female traits that are lost on most female characters. Echos Love for her father may have put her on a path of revenge, but she was ultimately a pawn for super powered female generational magic, which blows, because I really wanted her to be like Black widow, but ended up boring af.
Ms Marvel doesnt fight to save her family, in fact her family was saving her majority of that fight, which is very odd and not feminine at all, Rambou has no female traits whats so ever and Captain Marvel is a board as usual. Nothing female in these characters at all, which makes them unrelatable to women and girls, and not at all interesting to men. When men say Women dont know what they want, or are indecisive, this is what we mean, you dont want these characters really, but you think you do until you have done it.
You ate getting too much credit to one punch man because neither of these were mentioned in manga, original webcomic or anime. There is no debate like that, even fight with one eyed alien overlord was very artificial and superficial in that regard. So don't make philosophy to something that was drawn for creeps and pretending to be deep work of art 😅
@@zawarudo1041that's true. Saitama's character is symbol for justice in manga and not for heroism. His character is represented as unconditional good work put forth for vague purpose. Story of opm does not revolve around Saitama, he is used as scape goat when villain's get increasingly dangerous. He is in story to represent strength and that's all.
I don't think the comparison with Disney's Aladdin is really fair when it comes to villains gaining the ultimate power seconds before defeat. If you play the fight in its entirety, Jafar had the upper hand the entire time until Aladdin tricked him into making the critical mistake that ended the fight. After all, we're talking about a resourceful and clever guy who spent several days talking to a genie who told him about the restrictions he has to abide by, facing a power-hungry maniac who only knows genies are powerful. Aladdin successfully exploited Jafar's flaw by reminding him of the genie being the source of his powers and capable of taking them all away, and Jafar didn't think for a second about the consequences of becoming a genie himself.
It's a classic victory of cunning against raw power.
Sun temperatures are not a problem for a blonde woman, she will fly there at night. But seriously. Fun fact is hitting a Sun is not that easy. Anything starting from Earth has inherent speed about 30km/s perpentual to E-S axis. It's hard enough to leave Earth gravity which only requires 11km/s. It's actually easier to hit the Sun from Earth by taking the opposite direction, leaving the Sol system and sling back, then "shooting" something from Earth directly.
But as for Sun gravity - 28g - that's nothing for cpt. Marvel. As even if she maintained this kind of acceleration it would take 1.2 days to travel from Earth to Sun alone. More if the intention was to not to hit the star at full speed about 3000km/s. But she wouldn't. Space navigation was not part of the set given her by a writing team. So she would probably head directly into the Sun, missing it for sure due to that initial perpentual speed vector.
1 hour and 22 minutes of this golden review is why I am thankful that Disney made this movie! Without the movie we wouldn't have this review! Thx Iger!
So, I take it you only want to watch bad movies just for the fun of the negative reviews of them? How bad do you want bad movies to be if your philosophy is that worse movies make for better reviews that are more entertaining than the movies they criticize?
@@adampkalb Who said anything about watching the bad movies?
"Because if there's one universal truth about women it's that they all get along" alright, I just died. of laughter, i'm dead. lololooloolool
Say hi to the sexy vampires.
Legit my wife or some other woman is usually talking shit to me about another woman. 😂😂😂
😀😁😅🤣😂 Exactly right. Don't ever mock that statement.
@@Colonel_RamRodSo much for the Sisterhood
45:26 Not only was Randy Quaid trying to protect his family when he took out the aliens, but he had a personal, dark and REAL reason: revenge. "Hello Boys, I'm BACK!" was SO thrilling in theaters because after all the abuse he went through at the hand of the Xenos. All the trauma of people not believing him back on Earth and claiming he was crazy. All of this came together in a moment of cathartic justice at the finale. His arc completed in the most brilliant way possible as he managed to somehow save the world -- _as a side mission._ Excellent reference, Despot.
Just because the apparently crazy person is right in one aspect doesn't mean he's right in all aspects. Or not crazy.
He might have been crazy but he died thinking he gets revenge and redemption. He also developed a martyr complex that ends up helping him because he doesn't hesitate when his missile won't fire.
FUCK ya it was!
On the topic of boss fights:
As a DM, one of the most important aspects to a combat encounter is the scene. I may not tell my players directly, but when I tell them things, describe things to them, or if they as for any more information regarding the area, I fully expect them to use their heads and use the location to their advantage such as throwing a chair, flipping a table, burning the stairs, climbing the rafters… because I want them to feel like heroic, I want them to be engaged. This is such a basic thing I cannot believe that the final boss fight is so shallow, the environment itself is a character too. I love Jackie Chan movies for this very thing, he uses the whole scene to his advantage. How do you mess up a fight scene?
24:17 This line reminded me of a joke someone once made: "When god was giving out intelligence, you were sitting on the toilette, but when he gave out stupidity did you go and get a second portion"
Something interesting I noticed about women in combat is that we're often much, much better at being sneaky and quiet while getting the drop on opponents than we are at outright assaulting them. I noticed that when my friend and I were talking about operators in R6- we were discussing realism, and Caveira seemed to be the most realistic of the female ops. She's light and her specialty is being quiet so she can ambush attackers, knock them down with a silenced weapon, interrogate them to reveal their teammates' positions, and then kill them. She's scary as fuck to play against, especially if you're still new to the game. I offhandedly suggested that all female ops be a bit more like her, with lighter arms but being much faster and quieter than most of the males (and also having fewer of them since about half the roster is women), and that made all of my friends upset. They'd hate to have an entire team of Cavs because she's so frustrating to play against, even by herself. It would be unbalanced as all hell, but I think giving all of the female ops more potential to be sneaky could be very interesting.
I wish that movies took that female aptitude for quiet, sneaky, and cunning in attacks more seriously. It's extremely satisfying to have a Mission Impossible style sneak session end with the quiet assassination of enemies, or to go wrong and force the perpetrator to find a creative escape route. Not every encounter needs to end with an all-out brawl. Power doesn't always come from physical strength. Having sequences that are quiet but thrilling keeps movies interesting, and it seems like fewer and fewer movies today have those quiet but intense scenes. They just want to have people, particularly women, beating the shit out of the baddies. It's boring. I'm really tired of everything being the exact same fight. That's why I don't really care for mainstream superhero movies anymore; I much prefer the thoughtful, tension-filled deconstructions of superheroes like The Boys (at least, the first season- haven't watched the second yet). There's plenty of fighting in that, but there's a balance with people sneaking around and avoiding getting into fights. There's also a demonstration of the power that women can have that doesn't involve physicality, and I find that much more interesting than having unrealistic fights where a 90 pound child can beat the shit out of a 6'4" roided out gym rat every single time they cross paths. My strength as a woman doesn't come from my ability to beat the shit out of people. It comes from my ability to navigate social situations, be cunning, and having a network, among other non-physical things. It's not bad to have the occasional badass woman that could realistically take on a man, maybe even a couple of them at the same time if she's skilled enough, but that has to be the exception instead of the rule. The vast, vast majority of real women can't do that. Making it seem like that's what we're supposed to do and we're weak, useless pieces of trash if we can't isn't empowering. It's degrading. Seems like no one in media got that memo, unfortunately.
Correct, women are better at stealth and subtlety. And when you fail or are caught, you immediately collapse emotionally into blubbering babies, invoking your little girl voices hoping that will get you mercy. Much of the time it works, until you encounter the one man who's immune to your blubbering. That man you label "misogynist" and scream for all the other men to save you from him. It's an effective, time-tested method of getting your way--but now men are hip to how fake you all are and are behaving accordingly.
I wholeheartedly agree on this one. I've never played the game, but I would take this from a different angle. In this case, books.
Like, I don't know, but the latest story I've been writing on, I made sure to make a point out of the fact that women are not as physically capable (it's fantasy, but fantasy is no excuse for bat shit writing and having no rhyme or reason to your strength system is bat shit writing). I like to ground physical aspects in reality, which means that, as long as physical training remains a thing to be necessary, a woman will not overpower a man with the same training that she had. Sorry, honey, your opponents won't run into war with nothing in their hands. Either way, I had someone tell me that it was backwards thinking, especially since the story is set in an alternative victorian era world and there's mostly men in power, which "should not be the case, because fantasy".
If I let women fight (if no stealthing is possible), it usually comes down to what the character can do - is it fantasy or not, and if so, what does it grant - but I usually go with the swift fighting style. For example: Don't use long and heavy-ass swords, use short ones with a long grip, so you can prop them against your forearm if you have to block. Otherwise, long blades could get hit on the longer end, ripping that shit out of your hands. Getting in close fast, dosging instead of blocking, and going in for blind spots, with short weapons that you can pressure on with your body weight, without having to waste energy trying to swing them.
Absolutely true! Men and women have different "strengths" so play into those.
Make women be more cunning, emotionally mature, be able to read situations better, etc.
Instead of making them as physically strong as men, which is nearly an impossibility.
Lol.
@@redreaper3065 Emotionally mature and able to read situations better? Westerner shush.
*”The Marvels is the worst movie of 2023!”*
Yeah…but only because there aren’t any more major Disney releases for the rest of the year that it could risk losing the title to (since Disney is their own biggest rival in the *“worst movies ever”* competition)…
Disney just constantly keeps one-upping themselves with each new release (which is actually quite an impressive achievement)!!
🤣🤷♀️
So everyone forgot The Flash on Warner Bros? Or Black Adam or do we hate this because WEMEN?
@@suzygirl1843 This movie was absolute garbage. The flash and Black Adam had a few points that could be considered entertaining (Michael Keaton and Pierce Brosnan were both good in these films), but this movie had absolutely nothing worth watching. There is absolutely nothing to praise in The Marvels.Nothing.
@@suzygirl1843what? This has nothing to do with "wemen" as you described it lol. Its pure trash and you know it
@@MAGAMAN Nope. Warner Bros movies are straight garbage. You guys fail to admit it because having WEMEN led projects is far worse
One-downing?
Iman Vellani looks like she's having an absolute blast. It's unfortunate that she's in such a bad movie; I hope she gets other roles that allow her to really show off her excitement and acting ability to the fullest extent before she turns into a jaded actress who's just there for the money. It really shows when actors don't care about the roles they're playing- Iman deserves to have a shot at being the best actress she can be while she still has the drive. Props to her for her performance.
Yeah, props to Iman, she is the only positive in this entire abomination. The utter shiet she's sourounded by makes her stand out even more, so hopefully that'll help her career, even though this movie sucked.
In a bad movie and an entire series. It really shows that even the best actors cant carry a pale of shite.
Yep unfortunately I think she’s being used as a token middle eastern girl for shitty writers to throw in for diversity/virtue signaling reasons, instead of having writers who give a shit writing good roles for her. That’s Disneys formula though, throw some absolute low effort shit or remake together and throw in some tokens who deserve much better roles and stories to get other virtue signalers raving about it, defending it, and throwing awards at it.
Ok
Most unconvincing crazy eyes attempt with that Darban
I think I finally understand modern storytelling.
It's all withdrawals and no deposits. Nothing goes into the bank, but the script takes out whatever it wants at any time.
I like it how the German "Dreck" has become the word of choice for describing new MCU material.
Fits very well
More like "scheiße"
Been looking forward to this for awhile now. Glad to finally see it! Strange that I enjoy watching a deep dive on a film and not watching the absolute tripe film itself.
Keep up the great work Despot.
Thanks man, glad you enjoyed it.
Are you telling me that the follow up to a billion dollar movie, produced during a phase of awesomeness from a company making bank did poorly?!?
My heavens. *[ Sarcasm]*
Will smith and Jamie foxx are great actors. Who were music stars. Foxx was a comedian, turned music star, turned actor.
I love the fact that your review is so thorough and you leave no mistake unanswered. You actually make the movies entertaining without having to watch them cause let's face it, we'd put a bullet in our heads halfway through these movies they are so bad. But, your reviews are the same runtime and satisfying. Please please please review the newer Evil Dead movie. My wife and I made it 15 mins before we determined that it was a huge waste of time.
Ohhh the villain arc. That’s one thing I particularly enjoyed from the latest Spiderverse movie. Spot started as this comical little criminal that was totally unthreatening and did a 180 as the movie progressed and he accumulated more power. Loved it.
best villain arc in a while
"2023 will be remembered as the year the superhero movie died."
2023 might be remembered as the year Hollywood died, as even the majority of big-budget non-superhero movies were flops too.
It may have died in 2023, but it was on its death bed since after Endgame. There may have been hope in Spiderman and GotG3, but that has long since passed and unfortunately the new Echo series is exactly the same bs strong female cus female strong messaging we've been getting. They couldnt just leave her as a rage filled, revenge assassin, nah she has magic now.
Nah lots of movies made money
Nick Fury being described as a passport bro made me choke on my cereal....brilliance....sheer brilliance.
😂😂😂 Same! I lost it!
THIS IS NOT WHAT TONY STARK DIED FOR- the people
I like how they have Monica say she can see light, when she should've said she can see raw energy and its flow. Ya know, like it was literally shown to us in Wandavision (I say energy instead of light because she could also see Agathas magic roots lining the walls to the cellar.
So in short the powers are as following
Captain Plank is an energy source, and can expel it at people (and apparently reignite a fucking sun)
Ms. Marvel can harness energy into solid matter
Monica Ramboring can see and absorb energy and then use it till she is drained
This took me 5 minutes to understand better than a team of professional writers
David Bowie was a singer who could act as well
Loved him in LABYRINTH
@@insertnamehere5809 💯💯. His best performance
David Bowie is a superhuman so........
@@insertnamehere5809
The Prestige.
David Bowie, Barbra Streisand, Cher, Will Smith, Jared Leto, Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin and on and on and on. Love this dude's videos, but his comment was the dumbest comment I may have ever heard
Removing Carol from Endgame would let characters do some things they should have done in her place. Rocket should have been the one to rescue Tony and Nebula, Thor could have Bifrosted him to Nidavellir and he could take the pod from there. At most it should have been Rocket and Thor together. This would have given the movie time to show him learning that all his friends were dead. Thor could have taken out Thanos's ship, it would be a nice gesture after all the Fat Thor jokes. Instead CM just sort of showed up and did stuff.
I had similiar thoughts with Kraglin rescuing Tony with Rocket later joining him . Carol Danvers' presence felt forced while Nebula & Rocket fitting in with the Avengers well
Nah I liked her in Endgame.
It's so good that this video essay is almost as long as the marvels and far more enjoyable
Your Blade Pitch is FIRE
Rambeau looked so interesting in WandVision and i really wanted to learn more about her character and was curious how it'll continue, but The Marvels really never caught my attention.
To be fair, even Nicole Kidman couldn’t make Darben work
Nicole Kidman doesn't have to sleep with great actors to get roles. She's a terrific actress, unlike Tom Hiddleston's baby mama.
@@Falconer22idk, I think a role or two came off of pretending her and Tom Cruise were married.
Derp Anne.
I’d watch her try
@MollieLolly
You can make Dar-Benn work with minimal effort if you just admit Captain Marvel is the villain (which she _is_) and have this be a story about Dar-Benn being the protagonist trying to save her/his people from a space tyrant who thinks she's a god. There; I just saved The Marvels in literally the least effort possible.
Interestingly enough, I watched the Marvels and Blue beetle on the same day (I was feeling particularly masochistic that day) and was given two distinct flavors of bad.
The Marvels was much more incompetently made, but I didn’t feel anything beyond mild bemusement while watching it. I also (conveniently) missed the portion involving sentient plank of wood, because I decided to take a bathroom break just before they got to the singing planet.
Blue beetle on the other hand had some high points I enjoyed, but it also annoyed me a lot more. It definitely felt like the kind of movie I’d seen a million times before, so I was waiting impatiently for the characters to catch up and stop going through the same superhero tropes every other movie had done (they never 👎 )
I laugh out loud every time Nixon pops up to says "that means it is not illegal"
Excellent work! Thank you for suffering through this movie to make us laugh.
Still think the eternals and thor love and thunder have been the worst and she hulk is the worst tv show so far in marvel.
The only reason the villain, whatever tf her name is, was cast is because she's Tom Hiddleston's baby mother. That's it. You can see by her terrible acting. At least it doesn't stand outwith the rest of the awful acting.
The "wide eyed, teeth bared" villain part is particularly unfortunate for this actress because of that gap in her front teeth.
I can't take her seriously when she's trying to be menacing, and flashes those chompers.
Edited for typos.
Yeah, it’s goofy and ridiculous as heck
She is a distractingly unattractive woman
Half the time, I couldn't tell if she was sneering or trying to summon a ship through that *Jump Gate* between her front teeth....
And the costume and makeup departments really failed her too. She is goofy as fuck.
10:48 The Marvels watching Boogie Nights would've been interesting. Now I want to go watch Boogie Nights again.
Dirk's prosthetic 🍆 looked more realistic then the CGI in THE MARVELS
"I'm a star. I'm a bright, shining star" 😂😂
@@johnstrika9170 You've got the touch, You've got the power.
4 unlikable or unknown women as stars and a feminist as a director. what could go wrong?
The biggest superhero box office disaster of all time. That's what could go wrong.
What's wrong with a feminist director? Greta Gerwig is brilliant and she's one.
I don't really see what the issue with them being unknown actors is, plenty of good actors aren't huge stars. Also, the actors aren't even really unlikable they're just portraying characters people don't like. And as the above comment said a feminist director isn't inherently a bad thing. Seriously I don't like this movie but complaining that the actors are "unknown" or that the director is a feminist is just so stupid.
No one is going to gaslight me into believing a feminist director will ever be good.
So i agree with you. Shitty movie, and shitty actors.
Don’t know about the rest but kamala khan and iman velani who plays her are very likable.
this video has a greater duration than the time spent editing marvel
The insertions of "the steacks" is killing me 😂😂
Awesome review and critics, with a lot of good points that obviously remind me of the Drinker or the Reaper... 💪😎
I saw Blade when it came out. When the sunglasses get tossed up in the air and he catches them to put them back on people CHEERED. Man I miss good movies in the theater.
Independence Day wasn't the best movie, quite a few flaws in it, but damn it had to many good, inspiring, heroic, heart-tearing scenes. Also no stupid diversity stuff, just people being people.
ID is a masterpiece if we compare it to current Marvel or Disney movies.
An important element at play, too, is that it's sincere. The movie itself and everyone involved in making it seem to care about it's characters and story as much we're supposed to, so it's easy to be... manipulated (for lack of a better word). That actually used to be common practice but it feels like that's becoming a lost art for some reason.
@@ASpooneyBardI swear movies in the past, even the ones that could be considered bad from a critical standpoint , were more enjoyable because at least they were sincere with what they were presenting to the audience.
@@ASpooneyBardThat'd because people at large have became more cynical, sarcastic and fake as social media had an increasingly bigger impact on society.
There are so many criticisms of The Marvels in this essay, but no mention that Capt Marvel found a home world for the Skrulls and Fury should have been furious after the events of Secret Invasion. I have to wonder what was left on the cutting room floor.
That goldeneye 64 reference hit close to home, she always ran in front of the AK
I've just seen The Marvels but there is something that has been confusing me.
In Secret Invasion, literally a few months ago, a faction of the Skrulls tried to ignite WW3 on Earth...so now in The Marvels, Valkyrie takes them all from the colony to New Asgard, but didn't the President of the US in the MCU sign a bill to treat Skrulls as a hostile threat? The US in the MCU knows about New Asgard, don't they? Surely they'd figure out the Skrulls are all there now and doesn't that mean the Skrulls are in even more danger?
When does The Marvels take place? Is it before Secret Invasion or after?
im betting the writers dont even know
TFW you'd rather watch an essay that's as long as the Marvels than the movie itself. Thanks Despot, needed something to watch with my lunch!
Captain Marvel was overpowering God mode Thanos in End Game, but a girl boss with a grill gave Karen, I mean Carol, all she can handle. OK film. That'll due.
Thanos slapping her back to the kitchen was that movies high point
This video should be required viewing by all directors, producers, writers and studio executives before any movie is allowed to begin production.
And BTW: The kids that lost out on your being a teacher to them is a tragedy. What an incredible educator for young minds you'd have been. Fortunately, you still educate to VERY LARGE classes, only via RUclips now. You're one of the best minds on here. The analysis in this video is brilliant!
Yeah the classrooms' lost is our win.
All videos like this should be. There is absolutely no excuse for the mediocrity being displayed in the film industry right now. Especially since these people are supposed to be "the best" in the business.
Those kids are fortunate. This idiot is yakking on about a b level 90 minute movie for 83 minutes. The movie isn't influential nor was it a big hit. So this video is like using an AR 15 on an ant. His complaints are nitpicking.
I think the writers were so worried about AI taking the jobs because they have been using it instead of actually putting in to work of making a good original script from scratch
By far the worst MCU villain I can think of! She’s just so meh…
And the actress playing her isn’t much better
Dude you can watch everything everywhere all at once and see how incredibly capable a woman can be in a fight, they just consistently fail to make it believable
Fantastic movie. It's nice to see actual characters that can act actually developing throughout the film. All writers should watch it and take notes.
Haywire is a good movie that shows a woman being believable in fight.
@@miturbinizdurdy
Not to put down the movie but you could make a looong list of movies they should take notes from. Really they should head back to middle school Shakespeare at this point.
or watch the live action re movies, cgi yes but Alice isn't a Don't need no man kind of character, because Men save her and protect her often in the movies.
Is that the one where they wanted me to buy that a grandma is a pugilist? Lol. Lmao, even.
"How in the name of Harvey Weinstein's chastity did this get made?"
God dammit man, i was drinking water when you said that and i almost choked to death trying not to spit it out XD
At this point something being "the worst of 2023" doesn't even surprise me anymore. What a shite year for content
The "No offense 74 year old Samuel Jackson" killed me.
Oh shit! I didn’t know he could just invoke “Despotic Infallibility” like that. I’m both in shock and in awe
The singing prince isn't from BTS. He's a well-known South Korean Kdrama actor (who's actually really talented if you watch Fight for My Way, What's Wrong With Secretary Kim, or Itaewan Class). Maybe the issue here is the language barrier or the fact that he's not really a singer/dancer by trade. Its sad, because he's actually an amazing actor (see the shows I listed above).
Your Blade Movie Pitch would make me go to the cinema