There was a update i forgot to include! - *****New Update Post: (8.5 months later)***** Hello everyone, It’s been a long time since I’ve been here, a lot has happened and truth be told I haven’t had the time to post an update here, but I finally have a quiet moment to give you an update. First, I want to thank everyone here for helping me at such a pivotal time in my life. After re-reading my original threads, I can’t believe how indecisive and weak I came off in them. The prospect of my marriage ending and dying alone really kind of shook me to my core, and thus made me come off that way. I started therapy and it made me realize that being single wasn’t the worst thing that could happen to me, in fact I’ve turned my loneliness into solitude and have taken the time to work on myself. And if that last sentence didn’t tip you off, then let me be the first to tell you that I’m single now. Me and Andrea are legally separated and currently in divorce mediation. Unfortunately Andrea is still very much in denial and is trying everything she can to get me back, including delaying the divorce as much as possible so that we can work on our marriage. She claims that she’s begun seeing a therapist who’s helped her see the problem she has and has gotten her on the path to recovery. I don’t know if I buy it, but I told her it’s a good thing if it’s true. She has also apologized to my parents, hers and her late husband’s parents for what she’s done and offered to pay back the money, they’ve all forgiven her, but are keeping her at an arms length. She’s been desperate to reconnect with Cassie, but Cassie has kept her word and decided to never speak to her mother again, or at least until she’s ready to. Andreas wealthy friends she was so desperate to impress have been around our house offering their help. They may be nosy busy bodies, but they were very nice to me and Cassie in the immediate aftermath of Andrea’s betrayal. They offered everything from a shoulder to cry on, to baked goods to spa dates. I only ever really took them up on the baked goods because I will never turn down homemade lemon bars and oatmeal raisin cookies. Cassie did take them up on spa dates, so there’s that. One woman in particular, Susan has been around more often than the others. While I feel like the other friends were prying for information, she seemed more genuine and just there to help me and Cassie heal. She cooked meals for us, helped around the house and just spent a lot of quality time with me in particular. We didn’t ask, want or need her to do any of this for us, but she did it out of the kindness of her heart and I really appreciate it. We’ve gotten a lot closer in such a short time, and I truly consider her a friend. It’s actually amazing I could get along with someone who’s so much younger than me(14 years) usually I have a hard time connecting with younger people, even if they’re adults. But now we get to the most important part of this update: Cassie. As a cheer up Christmas gift I took her and one of her friends to Montreal last month to see her favorite artist Billie Eilish at this festival. She loved it, and Montreal is such a beautiful city to visit. All in all, she took the loss of her college fund pretty well. Cassie is a very hard working person, and she put her nose to the grindstone trying to find a scholarship. Unfortunately she missed the cutoff for most of the scholarships she could have qualified for, but the school of her choice is giving her a very generous financial aid package. In addition, she qualified for some local grants so she got her entire first year covered. And yes, Cassie did thankfully get into her school of choice, in fact she had many acceptance letters and full ride offers but she had her heart set on her school of choice. In fact, I dropped her off last week I’m extremely proud of her and I know she’ll do well. I’m an empty nester now all alone in this big house, and the silence is deafening, but Susan has been around to keep me company and I’ve taken up bike riding as a hobby. So all in all, things are okay, not great, but certainly better than before. And with that, I think I can put this saga to bed, the divorce will hopefully be finalized in the next few months and I can finally move on with my life. But the most important thing is that Cassie is fulfilling her dreams and potential and I couldn’t be happier about that.
@@shadowmaster335i don't really think so. Now that cassie is going off to post-secondary, the frequency of the visits should see a sharp decline. But who really knows.
@@Seafor-v4l Dude sounds well off, at least on the surface with all the expensive things his wife was buying, and he didn't blink an eye like they would be normal any other time. Could just be someone seeing an opportunity now that the cash cow is single. Can really only base this off the info provided though.
The type of people who called Story 2's Stepdad "creepy" for hugging his crying daughter are the type of people who never experienced proper parental love and care.
No bro, it’s the way he worded it that made it sound weird he didn’t say he consoled her or allowed her to vent he said he cuddled her. That’s weird way to word someone crying on your shoulder.
If my father who abandoned me told me 'if you two can't get along I am going to give my inheritence to the kid I was able to raise', my response would have simply been 'so you're going to pretend to like me just so you can manipulate me and threaten to abandon me for a second time? Be honest with yourself, you didn't lack ability to raise me, you lacked interest in doing so' and hung up. In that moment, OP's dad showed exactly why his brother is so entitled - the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
@@AECH_CH Assuming he honestly intends to leave him anything. This scummy sort of behavior and entitlement, mixed with his favoritism towards his second son? It stinks of carrot-on-string behavior used to try to control OP. I've heard of people dangling inheritance over others for control, only for people to find out they were tricked and weren't getting anything. In any case, I doubt this will be the only thing daddy dearest does threatening to withhold inheritance if his demands are not met. It's likely just the first thing.
Think it was more an empty threat, some people that like/love two people can’t understand why they might not get on . Like it’s just because they are being awkward, and can’t get it that some people just are different. Especially with siblings if one is always nice to your face and seems agreeable and the other questions and disagree it’s hard to see what they are really like!
@@danijohnson-dm9lh I disagree, for the simple fact that his dad's reaction was like a flip on a switch - OP says his dad just seemed to out of nowhere shift his demeanor and threaten to take away his inheritance if he didn't continue pampering his brother. For him to flip like that seems to me to be a show of his true colors - he clearly has a favorite kid, and he clearly did not appreciate the child he abandoned speaking poorly of said favorite.
@@AECH_CH If you're below a living wage, then yeah. But most people don't need that money, and even if they did, most people would spend it far too quickly to make any actual difference in their lives.
Story 1: I would tell the dad to keep his inheritance for the son he raised. He used that against OP once, and I would never let him have the opportunity to do it again. So what he apologized? His pride is why he never contacted the son he STEADILY did wrong. This man lacks any follow through, integrity, etc. If he had raised his son properly, then this wouldn't have happened.
Story 2: I love that OP defended her, and is willing to sacrifice his retirement for his daughter. I can see why Cassie loves him more than her mom. He believes in her. He should still divorce. Cassie will be 18, and can choose to stay indefinitely with her dad and grandparents. She doesn't deserve to stay with her mom who won't take accountability for ruining someone's future
They know the game by now and can't be threatened. That inheritance is fairy money anyway with the way that family spends. Don't depend on it and you can't be robbed of it.
Story 1 dad can still do better. People can change, even if they were unspeakable awful before. And yes, holding the will against the OP was messed up. But if the dad can admit he was wrong and the OP can forgive him, then I don't see why they can't be a happy father and son duo, despite the ugly past
In the 2nd story the OP isn't a step father he is a father, I heard and read a lot of story and it is rare to see a step father did what the OP did, most of the times they don't care about their step child, but this one did, he go futher and beyond to make sure her daugther get the future that she wants and deserve, if she is as brilliant as he said, she deserve to be in that Ivy school, also Cassie seems to be responsible, she know about the money but doesn't touch it.
@@Nameless01153 No they are not or not like this, I repeat that heard and read a lot of stories and I tell again is rate, do you really think this is the only place where I hear stories? Because it isn't, not to mention the ones that I actually read, is not like is always time bad, but like the OP on this story, never, like I said, he isn't a step father he is a father.
@@DarkHeartTheEmo he’s not a stepfather or a father because he doesn’t have children. He’s a stepdad if it’s not your nut then you’re not a father you’re a dad but yeah many stepdads are this way where the fuck you’re reading is gloomy as fuck but a lot of stepdads are this exact same way I read so many sites where I hear people who act the exact same way I don’t know what the fuck you’re reading but it’s depressing
@@jordanwardle11 As I understand the curriculum between colleges is mostly identicle so i would compare these kind of colleges more to the supreme brand than anything. Functionally identicle to its vastly cheaper peers but comes with the prestige of being expensive.
It depends on your school. With the more expensive ones, you're basically paying for the name and prestige that comes with it. This gets you better job offers afterwards, so depending on your field it's entirely worth it. I have a friend who paid something like $60k a year for a 4-year study. She had to take loans out for it, but then was able to pay back those loans in just 2 years since getting a job, as she got into a very well paying position due to the school she went to.
Story 1 is a bit confusing because OP calls Justin, his “stepbrother”, but he’s actually OP’s half-brother because it’s his father’s biological son. I thought I missed a chunk of the story, but it just turns out that the OP didn’t use the correct terminology.
@@satyadeepcreation6549, huh? Step-siblings do not share a biological parent, so there is no blood relation (unless they’re cousins or otherwise related, but that’s a different story). Half-siblings, on the other hand, share one biological parent and are blood related. So, technically, they are not the same. Although, people who have strong, positive relationships with their step or half siblings often don’t even make those distinctions, and just call them “my brother or sister”.
@@whitehawk7082 I agree with you about what you have said but at the same time I can't. The reason is that in many countries like mine, all half-siblings are also termed and can be called as step-siblings but vice versa can't be said. We take half-siblings as one of the conditions of step-siblings.
@@satyadeepcreation6549 , the two terms are not interchangeable in English speaking countries. Legally, they must remain as two distinct relationships, although I’ve heard people incorrectly use either term in social situations.
"If you two can't be brothers, I'd have to give my wealth to the person I've been able to raise." He means the one that he chose to raise. And if him pretending to love his son who he abandoned is dependent entirely on putting up with his favorite spoiled brat, then losing him is probably a gift
The good part of the first story is that the patents didnt deny their enabling. Especiallythe mom. She tpok full responsiblity and try to fix op and his father relationship. And the father didnt argue and immediately attempt to mend
second story: a 7 y.o. lexus... she had to replace a 7y.o. lexus and paid for a new mercedes in CASH, nah uh, car gets sold ASAP, money back in fund, divorce unless she forks the rest of the money ASAP, she can get a 30 y.o. mercedes and lexus and she can start wearing from thrift stores for all I care, everything she owns and uses goes on sale
2nd OP is through-and-through a doormat. His STEP daughter can apply for scholarships, or a cheaper school. Compromising your life's work/retirement for an overpriced degree is lunacy.
@@zamp_gaming Yes and no. While it is good that he ultimately didn't end up doing what you mentioned, he had to be thoroughly convinced to not. 13:09 He even says that himself, without the intervention of redditors, calling him a doormat... He would have absolutely done all that. Men are in a terrible state, if we need redditors of all people to convince us to NOT be doormats.
@@zamp_gaming Ivy League schools do mean something if you go to college you graduate and you go tell a company that you went to a college that isn’t really known you’re less likely to not get hired versus if you told them you went to a college like Harvard the schools the more expensive ones set you up with connections and make life easier because you’re more likely to get the highest paying job, the start.
Sounds like the dad is very rich. If its like a $1m + inheritance then you should suck it up. That money will secure a good life for you and your family.
S1: I don't get why you would move back to the US after retirement. Right at the point of your life where you're going to have health issues, you're leaving a country with proper healthcare. Bye bye money.
Story 1: OP thought its good idea to invite a man who he never met in his house around his wife.. even if its a stepbrother from a different country with a different culture... Few month more we would hav a totally different story about cheating......how his wife and step brother sleep. Blaming his wife...
2:02 A will is only worth anything if there is something in it. And if someone tries to bite you with a will, you probably won't get a dime. 5:20 Why did your wife let them in or didn't kicked them out, maybe with the help of police. I would have expected my wife to already have dealt with that. 7:33 And the next sign that your Clara isn't that good of a choice. 12:49 She committed a severe case of felony theft, she's not in the position to make any demands. Next question would be why she even had single full access to that account so that you don't even get the bank statements and why you don't press charges against her?
2) What makes him think life is over if she goes to an affordable college? Did you not learn anything over the years? These schools traded academics for profit. Its gotten so bad they ask how you payed for college on interviews.
Honestly her problem seems manageable. It's stupid, yes, but it's still infinitely better than cheating which causes irreparable damage imo. If she takes full accountability, sells the stuff she bought to recoup part of the money, goes to therapy, and makes a plan to start saving money from her job and make a new secure savings account, I think OP could give her a chance.
Story 2: a hug is not sexual. Some of you act like he’s a nonce or something when he was just comforting the person he sees as his own daughter and I’m sure who sees him as her real dad, there’s nothing wrong with it. Anyway the mother knew what she was doing and knew the risks behind her spending that money so deserved to take the blame.
I would tell my dad point blank at this point in time you'll be serving time in prison for neglect and child abandonment. Many judges have put dads in their 60s in prison who abandoned their children to run off to other countries to avoid having child support updated and visiting and having a relationship with it's considered neglect and abandonment.
saying you’ll just give the money to the child you raised is so telling those kids aren’t equal one is his child and the other is a child related to him
I agree. OP's dad failed as a father, but not for the reasons you suggest. One son (OP) can stand on his own, the other (Justin) is weak, and wouldn't survive the day without his parent's money to throw around. A Father's job is to prepare their kids for the world, the good and the bad. He only succeeded in OP's case by staying away. Had they been raised as equals, there would be two useless, weak children. OP may appreciate any inheritance, but he doesn't need it. He'll live a good life with or without it. Anything Justin gets, he'll blow through in a year or less, he'll end up broke, and absolutely helpless to re-establish himself without his parent's money or nepotism. But I have a sneaking suspicion the father knows this. Why else would he force a relationship between them? He knows OP will ultimately need to take care of his brother, manage his finances, bail him out of trouble. He has two sons, one responsible, the other... not so much. I think he was hoping OP might form a bond with his brother and perhaps become the custodian of his trust-fund one day. I know a lot of wealthy people, and this is often how it plays out. The most responsible child inherits their share and the rest is left to a legal trust to be paid out at fixed intervals so the irresponsible children don't blow through it too quickly. But someone needs to manage it, pay taxes on their home, make sure they don't get scammed into a bad investment, etc. The trust could be overseen by a simple legal framework, but appointing a family member as custodian gives a lot more flexibility. With large inheritances, this is almost standard practice, but he needs to know OP truly has his brother's best interests at heart before making that decision. Returning to the U.S. might even be a part of that plan, as the U.S. has a more favorable system for that, but they all need to be naturalized citizens. OP's dad might not be father of the year, but I don't get the sense he's an idiot either. You don't become wealthy or maintain inherited wealth for very long if you don't know how to use the system to your advantage, and these moves are all predictable from a financial and inheritance standpoint. His actions may not have been in the best interests of familial harmony, but viewed from a more pragmatic stance, it's very calculated. There's another agenda here.
@@Arkryal you just typed out a longer version of what he literally said, and said that you believed it was for a different reason, even though you just said in a longer version the exact same thing as what he did
Story 1: Bro, it is better if you don't threaten me, if you do then you can go to hell for all i care doesn't matter bs like blood ties when you were the one who abandoned me first
@@LordePhantom Firstly your talking about story 2. Secondly, while true Ivy league schools will open doors. Once you get your first job and get your experience, no one will care what school you went to. Better to get a scholarship to an average college and spend that 200k on a house.
If you how to fix your car you dont need a mechanic Dont jump to therapy for every little thing It will make you guys depended Therapy is a service a business they will recommend it but take charge of your life
there's restaraunt jobs in NA where if you're not getting tipped you're pretty much not getting paid. This is mostly at restaraunts fancy enough your food gets carried to your table. Don't tip, expect resentment and shenanigans. Just how much was this guy tipping that he ran out of money though!? Probably unreasonable amounts
I'm confused is it his step-brother or his half brother, he states his step-brother was born after his dad remarried so wouldn't that make him his half-brother.
Can someone actually tell me why they just resell the shopping items or the mercedes or what not somewhwre or the other, cuz i find it extremely stupid for not just sellong all those expensive pieces of crap. Couldve released the burden somewhat, really
Honestly, it sounds like he was just doing that to protect himself and Cassie. He was afraid Andrea would do something drastic and since she had already broken trust, he wanted to prevent any possibility of her messing things up more than she already did. I do admit, that I personally feel it is a bit weird that he decided he is a pushover if he does not divorce her rather than at least trying to help her through therapy, I can only assume there were many more issues previously that he did not mention in his posts and this was rather the straw that broke the camels back. If this was the first major issue he had with her though, I don't see why you can't try a bit harder to make things work if you love her, then again, she tried some shady shit after she was caught, I would have more sympathy if she did not try and avoid accountability and even attempting to have him take accountability for her actions in her stead after she got caught.
I really don't understand story one and why the original poster cares if her dad disinherited her from his inheritance like I get why the original poster is doing it because however much money the dad is going to hand over from his inheritance understandably is probably going to be life-changing but yet the fact that the original poster literally states that she wants nothing to do with her dad and she knows he's a piece of crap I don't understand why she just let him back into her life so easily just because him and her had one emotional moment between each other but she couldn't see that he was still that same person going forward when she asked for his stepson to be living in her house and her life literally becoming a living hell going forward just because of the inheritance I know for a fact if I was in that situation I would try to put up with a two just to like get the money out of it but that's going to be for such a long time so at the same time I feel like fuck I might just get out of there and just be like screw this I'm not going to deal with this shit even if I get disowned by the dad and don't get to have it as inheritance
Collegefund evaporating Hell no, i would not be taking the fall for that … no way I would be selling anything and everything bought with the money and is viable to be sold. All the sell your shit apps here i come
So, OP's wife in story 1 got sexually harassed by Justin's drunk friend when he trashed the house but she is demanding he pretends to like the brother for what? I'm getting gold digger vibes from her.
well he apparently has no significant money so can't really say she's a gold digger but it does appear like she's concerned about the inheritance, which most people would be to varying levels.
Or she's like most wives who don't want to be responsible for their spouse breaking contact with family. She knows how much OPs dad means to him, and so she was ready to ignore harassment for him. Good thing OP is a better man than his father because he didn't allow that for his wife
Lol, I will say tho it kinda feels like he's jumping the gun and this looks like a problem that could be fixed together. Maybe it's just me being naive, but the divorce seems kinda extreme.
3:35 Was on the OP's side and shook my head when he said he wasted food, but when he said the waitress WANTED a tip, I saw OP as the alien here. You don't demand or ask for a tip, you should get one if the person feels like giving one. A tip is a nice charitable gesture, not an expectation.
There was a update i forgot to include! -
*****New Update Post: (8.5 months later)*****
Hello everyone,
It’s been a long time since I’ve been here, a lot has happened and truth be told I haven’t had the time to post an update here, but I finally have a quiet moment to give you an update.
First, I want to thank everyone here for helping me at such a pivotal time in my life. After re-reading my original threads, I can’t believe how indecisive and weak I came off in them. The prospect of my marriage ending and dying alone really kind of shook me to my core, and thus made me come off that way. I started therapy and it made me realize that being single wasn’t the worst thing that could happen to me, in fact I’ve turned my loneliness into solitude and have taken the time to work on myself.
And if that last sentence didn’t tip you off, then let me be the first to tell you that I’m single now. Me and Andrea are legally separated and currently in divorce mediation. Unfortunately Andrea is still very much in denial and is trying everything she can to get me back, including delaying the divorce as much as possible so that we can work on our marriage. She claims that she’s begun seeing a therapist who’s helped her see the problem she has and has gotten her on the path to recovery. I don’t know if I buy it, but I told her it’s a good thing if it’s true. She has also apologized to my parents, hers and her late husband’s parents for what she’s done and offered to pay back the money, they’ve all forgiven her, but are keeping her at an arms length. She’s been desperate to reconnect with Cassie, but Cassie has kept her word and decided to never speak to her mother again, or at least until she’s ready to.
Andreas wealthy friends she was so desperate to impress have been around our house offering their help. They may be nosy busy bodies, but they were very nice to me and Cassie in the immediate aftermath of Andrea’s betrayal. They offered everything from a shoulder to cry on, to baked goods to spa dates. I only ever really took them up on the baked goods because I will never turn down homemade lemon bars and oatmeal raisin cookies. Cassie did take them up on spa dates, so there’s that. One woman in particular, Susan has been around more often than the others. While I feel like the other friends were prying for information, she seemed more genuine and just there to help me and Cassie heal. She cooked meals for us, helped around the house and just spent a lot of quality time with me in particular. We didn’t ask, want or need her to do any of this for us, but she did it out of the kindness of her heart and I really appreciate it. We’ve gotten a lot closer in such a short time, and I truly consider her a friend. It’s actually amazing I could get along with someone who’s so much younger than me(14 years) usually I have a hard time connecting with younger people, even if they’re adults.
But now we get to the most important part of this update: Cassie. As a cheer up Christmas gift I took her and one of her friends to Montreal last month to see her favorite artist Billie Eilish at this festival. She loved it, and Montreal is such a beautiful city to visit. All in all, she took the loss of her college fund pretty well. Cassie is a very hard working person, and she put her nose to the grindstone trying to find a scholarship. Unfortunately she missed the cutoff for most of the scholarships she could have qualified for, but the school of her choice is giving her a very generous financial aid package. In addition, she qualified for some local grants so she got her entire first year covered. And yes, Cassie did thankfully get into her school of choice, in fact she had many acceptance letters and full ride offers but she had her heart set on her school of choice. In fact, I dropped her off last week I’m extremely proud of her and I know she’ll do well. I’m an empty nester now all alone in this big house, and the silence is deafening, but Susan has been around to keep me company and I’ve taken up bike riding as a hobby. So all in all, things are okay, not great, but certainly better than before.
And with that, I think I can put this saga to bed, the divorce will hopefully be finalized in the next few months and I can finally move on with my life. But the most important thing is that Cassie is fulfilling her dreams and potential and I couldn’t be happier about that.
i have a feeling there'll be an update down the line where "surprise" susan & op are dating
@@shadowmaster335i don't really think so. Now that cassie is going off to post-secondary, the frequency of the visits should see a sharp decline. But who really knows.
@@Seafor-v4l Dude sounds well off, at least on the surface with all the expensive things his wife was buying, and he didn't blink an eye like they would be normal any other time. Could just be someone seeing an opportunity now that the cash cow is single. Can really only base this off the info provided though.
I am actually surprised... I thought the friends were going to drop Andrea and Cassie like last night's napkin.
I am Not looking in comments often do you Forget edits/updates often?
The type of people who called Story 2's Stepdad "creepy" for hugging his crying daughter are the type of people who never experienced proper parental love and care.
reddit
They are, likely, also the type to do something unimaginable if they were step dad.
I like to point those people as the ones who watch to much of a certain category of corn
They’re the type that watch’s step parent and sibling naughty vids.
@@TheReal_AntreyI had a friend like that who was addicted to corn he said it was weird and creepy that I hugged my mother and lifted her up
Leave it to Reddit to make a father hugging and consoling his daughter seem inappropriate
I swear he could say he punched her in the mouth and these weirdos wouldnt care as much as when he hugs his own damn daughter.
Reddit is a bunch of terminally online coomers
Of course Reddit does lol
Those comments are likely from bitter feminists
Yep "all men are rapists" people
Anyone who says it's weird for a father to console his daughter has never experienced true familial love. I feel sorry for them.
No bro, it’s the way he worded it that made it sound weird he didn’t say he consoled her or allowed her to vent he said he cuddled her. That’s weird way to word someone crying on your shoulder.
@@Nameless01153 same, I get what OP meant but with the word and the way this channel reads out the word it sounded off but I knew he meant console.
When fathers actually doing what fathers supposed to do, people really calling them creepy.
Imagine, he he just trying to keep his family together
It’s the way he worded it not what he did
@@Nameless01153 Seek help
If my father who abandoned me told me 'if you two can't get along I am going to give my inheritence to the kid I was able to raise', my response would have simply been 'so you're going to pretend to like me just so you can manipulate me and threaten to abandon me for a second time? Be honest with yourself, you didn't lack ability to raise me, you lacked interest in doing so' and hung up. In that moment, OP's dad showed exactly why his brother is so entitled - the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
Depends on the inheritance, principles don't count much, bank does.
@@AECH_CH Assuming he honestly intends to leave him anything. This scummy sort of behavior and entitlement, mixed with his favoritism towards his second son? It stinks of carrot-on-string behavior used to try to control OP. I've heard of people dangling inheritance over others for control, only for people to find out they were tricked and weren't getting anything.
In any case, I doubt this will be the only thing daddy dearest does threatening to withhold inheritance if his demands are not met. It's likely just the first thing.
Think it was more an empty threat, some people that like/love two people can’t understand why they might not get on . Like it’s just because they are being awkward, and can’t get it that some people just are different. Especially with siblings if one is always nice to your face and seems agreeable and the other questions and disagree it’s hard to see what they are really like!
@@danijohnson-dm9lh I disagree, for the simple fact that his dad's reaction was like a flip on a switch - OP says his dad just seemed to out of nowhere shift his demeanor and threaten to take away his inheritance if he didn't continue pampering his brother. For him to flip like that seems to me to be a show of his true colors - he clearly has a favorite kid, and he clearly did not appreciate the child he abandoned speaking poorly of said favorite.
@@AECH_CH If you're below a living wage, then yeah. But most people don't need that money, and even if they did, most people would spend it far too quickly to make any actual difference in their lives.
He ain’t a step dad, he’s the dad who stepped up
While the mom stepped down
Story 1: I would tell the dad to keep his inheritance for the son he raised. He used that against OP once, and I would never let him have the opportunity to do it again. So what he apologized? His pride is why he never contacted the son he STEADILY did wrong. This man lacks any follow through, integrity, etc. If he had raised his son properly, then this wouldn't have happened.
Story 2: I love that OP defended her, and is willing to sacrifice his retirement for his daughter. I can see why Cassie loves him more than her mom. He believes in her.
He should still divorce. Cassie will be 18, and can choose to stay indefinitely with her dad and grandparents. She doesn't deserve to stay with her mom who won't take accountability for ruining someone's future
They know the game by now and can't be threatened. That inheritance is fairy money anyway with the way that family spends. Don't depend on it and you can't be robbed of it.
Story 1 dad can still do better. People can change, even if they were unspeakable awful before. And yes, holding the will against the OP was messed up. But if the dad can admit he was wrong and the OP can forgive him, then I don't see why they can't be a happy father and son duo, despite the ugly past
@@darryl0745he was gone from his kids life and dangled an inheritance first chance he got he’s a POS father.
In the 2nd story the OP isn't a step father he is a father, I heard and read a lot of story and it is rare to see a step father did what the OP did, most of the times they don't care about their step child, but this one did, he go futher and beyond to make sure her daugther get the future that she wants and deserve, if she is as brilliant as he said, she deserve to be in that Ivy school, also Cassie seems to be responsible, she know about the money but doesn't touch it.
Bro, you’re looking in the wrong places then cause a lot of stepdads are the exact same way with your stepchild
@@Nameless01153 No they are not or not like this, I repeat that heard and read a lot of stories and I tell again is rate, do you really think this is the only place where I hear stories? Because it isn't, not to mention the ones that I actually read, is not like is always time bad, but like the OP on this story, never, like I said, he isn't a step father he is a father.
@@DarkHeartTheEmo he’s not a stepfather or a father because he doesn’t have children. He’s a stepdad if it’s not your nut then you’re not a father you’re a dad but yeah many stepdads are this way where the fuck you’re reading is gloomy as fuck but a lot of stepdads are this exact same way I read so many sites where I hear people who act the exact same way I don’t know what the fuck you’re reading but it’s depressing
I'm glad story 1 ended with OP and his dad being able to patch things.
Redditors being fatherless enough to view a man being emotionally available "creepy" would be irritating if it wasn't so thoroughly unsurprising.
No bro, it’s how he worded it not about his emotional openness it’s the way he worded it
The dad in the first story us the only dead beat dad I've heard from reddit that actually turned out not to be an absolute **shole
Ok so I never went to college (military and trade school was better for me) but... 200 GRAND!? Is college really THAT expensive?
That's like the elite "rich kids" colleges. So like the rolls Royce or the Rolex of college. Tuition can be over 50k a year
@@jordanwardle11 As I understand the curriculum between colleges is mostly identicle so i would compare these kind of colleges more to the supreme brand than anything. Functionally identicle to its vastly cheaper peers but comes with the prestige of being expensive.
It depends on your school. With the more expensive ones, you're basically paying for the name and prestige that comes with it. This gets you better job offers afterwards, so depending on your field it's entirely worth it. I have a friend who paid something like $60k a year for a 4-year study. She had to take loans out for it, but then was able to pay back those loans in just 2 years since getting a job, as she got into a very well paying position due to the school she went to.
@@Nima-jneb The point is not really the curriculum there its more about getting connections to other businesses and prestige.
If you want to go to basically any division one school in America you have to pay at least 30k a year
Story 1 is a bit confusing because OP calls Justin, his “stepbrother”, but he’s actually OP’s half-brother because it’s his father’s biological son. I thought I missed a chunk of the story, but it just turns out that the OP didn’t use the correct terminology.
American education does that
Uhmmm...isn't the terms stepbrother and half-brother the same?
Edit: Had to Google it and yeah, I'm right.
@@satyadeepcreation6549, huh? Step-siblings do not share a biological parent, so there is no blood relation (unless they’re cousins or otherwise related, but that’s a different story). Half-siblings, on the other hand, share one biological parent and are blood related. So, technically, they are not the same. Although, people who have strong, positive relationships with their step or half siblings often don’t even make those distinctions, and just call them “my brother or sister”.
@@whitehawk7082 I agree with you about what you have said but at the same time I can't. The reason is that in many countries like mine, all half-siblings are also termed and can be called as step-siblings but vice versa can't be said. We take half-siblings as one of the conditions of step-siblings.
@@satyadeepcreation6549 , the two terms are not interchangeable in English speaking countries. Legally, they must remain as two distinct relationships, although I’ve heard people incorrectly use either term in social situations.
Why do they say “oh you can mend bridges. Why? Crap people don’t change
And I never understand trying to force a relationship with either a step parent or step siblings
Because dad's a door knob who thinks everything needs to be perfect
"If you two can't be brothers, I'd have to give my wealth to the person I've been able to raise." He means the one that he chose to raise. And if him pretending to love his son who he abandoned is dependent entirely on putting up with his favorite spoiled brat, then losing him is probably a gift
The good part of the first story is that the patents didnt deny their enabling. Especiallythe mom. She tpok full responsiblity and try to fix op and his father relationship. And the father didnt argue and immediately attempt to mend
second story: a 7 y.o. lexus... she had to replace a 7y.o. lexus and paid for a new mercedes in CASH, nah uh, car gets sold ASAP, money back in fund, divorce unless she forks the rest of the money ASAP, she can get a 30 y.o. mercedes and lexus and she can start wearing from thrift stores for all I care, everything she owns and uses goes on sale
2nd OP is through-and-through a doormat. His STEP daughter can apply for scholarships, or a cheaper school.
Compromising your life's work/retirement for an overpriced degree is lunacy.
I dont even think ive been in a room with someone who would laugh at a 2016 lexus ngl
@@Nima-jneb i never had a car that new ever
@@zamp_gaming Yes and no. While it is good that he ultimately didn't end up doing what you mentioned, he had to be thoroughly convinced to not.
13:09 He even says that himself, without the intervention of redditors, calling him a doormat... He would have absolutely done all that.
Men are in a terrible state, if we need redditors of all people to convince us to NOT be doormats.
@@zamp_gaming Ivy League schools do mean something if you go to college you graduate and you go tell a company that you went to a college that isn’t really known you’re less likely to not get hired versus if you told them you went to a college like Harvard the schools the more expensive ones set you up with connections and make life easier because you’re more likely to get the highest paying job, the start.
First story dad doesn't deserve any main character benefits. He decided to abandon his son and not even visit him.
THE STEP MOM AND THE DAD IN THE FIRST STORY ARE SANE ITS REFRESHING
Mother of Story #2 did one thing right: she found someone who could be a great parent to her child.
Story 1: Fake relationship is not worth it. Don't listen to Clara. F your dad.
Sounds like the dad is very rich. If its like a $1m + inheritance then you should suck it up. That money will secure a good life for you and your family.
@@AllEy3s0nMe already had his house destroyed and wife threatened. Suck it up? How much for how long? It got bad instantly.
@@tsm688 Weak mental.
17:04 as someone who currently works at Walmart... ouch.
S1: I don't get why you would move back to the US after retirement. Right at the point of your life where you're going to have health issues, you're leaving a country with proper healthcare. Bye bye money.
Story 1: OP thought its good idea to invite a man who he never met in his house around his wife.. even if its a stepbrother from a different country with a different culture...
Few month more we would hav a totally different story about cheating......how his wife and step brother sleep. Blaming his wife...
Best part, guy had a "jet lag" so he had to rest whole next day. He travelled from UK AHHAHAHAHHA
6:20 I think OP means he couldn't care less. if he could care less it means he does care, at least a little.
2:02 A will is only worth anything if there is something in it. And if someone tries to bite you with a will, you probably won't get a dime.
5:20 Why did your wife let them in or didn't kicked them out, maybe with the help of police. I would have expected my wife to already have dealt with that.
7:33 And the next sign that your Clara isn't that good of a choice. 12:49 She committed a severe case of felony theft, she's not in the position to make any demands.
Next question would be why she even had single full access to that account so that you don't even get the bank statements and why you don't press charges against her?
Its always the Justins man
2) What makes him think life is over if she goes to an affordable college? Did you not learn anything over the years? These schools traded academics for profit. Its gotten so bad they ask how you payed for college on interviews.
Really? I was never asked, they just took the FAFSA money
Yay I'm the first!
I wanna thank my family for giving me the drive to strive for this great achievement.
🎉
Honestly her problem seems manageable. It's stupid, yes, but it's still infinitely better than cheating which causes irreparable damage imo. If she takes full accountability, sells the stuff she bought to recoup part of the money, goes to therapy, and makes a plan to start saving money from her job and make a new secure savings account, I think OP could give her a chance.
"she called and offered anything to make it right: money, segs, favours..."
well, if she could get about 170K that could be a start 😅
Cassie should not go to Ivy League. It is so not worth it
Story 1: your partner only wants you to make up with them all because she wants you to get that inheritance, that’s all imma say🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
Story 2: a hug is not sexual. Some of you act like he’s a nonce or something when he was just comforting the person he sees as his own daughter and I’m sure who sees him as her real dad, there’s nothing wrong with it. Anyway the mother knew what she was doing and knew the risks behind her spending that money so deserved to take the blame.
Make sure the mother has no access to your bank account if you put your money in to make up the college fee costs again.
Did you really conclude that from the partner 'cause of one phrase? lmao
Story 2 : This marriage is over, and divorce is the only way.
I would tell my dad point blank at this point in time you'll be serving time in prison for neglect and child abandonment. Many judges have put dads in their 60s in prison who abandoned their children to run off to other countries to avoid having child support updated and visiting and having a relationship with it's considered neglect and abandonment.
Sell everything she bought to fill in the cash gap.
Of course Reddit will find some way to try and turn a Dad who's just trying to comfort his daughter into something harmful. Idiots.
saying you’ll just give the money to the child you raised is so telling
those kids aren’t equal
one is his child and the other is a child related to him
you put that perfectly
Well yeah of course they aren't he raised him , lived with him all his life of course he'd love him more then op
I agree. OP's dad failed as a father, but not for the reasons you suggest. One son (OP) can stand on his own, the other (Justin) is weak, and wouldn't survive the day without his parent's money to throw around. A Father's job is to prepare their kids for the world, the good and the bad. He only succeeded in OP's case by staying away. Had they been raised as equals, there would be two useless, weak children. OP may appreciate any inheritance, but he doesn't need it. He'll live a good life with or without it. Anything Justin gets, he'll blow through in a year or less, he'll end up broke, and absolutely helpless to re-establish himself without his parent's money or nepotism.
But I have a sneaking suspicion the father knows this. Why else would he force a relationship between them? He knows OP will ultimately need to take care of his brother, manage his finances, bail him out of trouble. He has two sons, one responsible, the other... not so much. I think he was hoping OP might form a bond with his brother and perhaps become the custodian of his trust-fund one day.
I know a lot of wealthy people, and this is often how it plays out. The most responsible child inherits their share and the rest is left to a legal trust to be paid out at fixed intervals so the irresponsible children don't blow through it too quickly. But someone needs to manage it, pay taxes on their home, make sure they don't get scammed into a bad investment, etc. The trust could be overseen by a simple legal framework, but appointing a family member as custodian gives a lot more flexibility. With large inheritances, this is almost standard practice, but he needs to know OP truly has his brother's best interests at heart before making that decision.
Returning to the U.S. might even be a part of that plan, as the U.S. has a more favorable system for that, but they all need to be naturalized citizens. OP's dad might not be father of the year, but I don't get the sense he's an idiot either. You don't become wealthy or maintain inherited wealth for very long if you don't know how to use the system to your advantage, and these moves are all predictable from a financial and inheritance standpoint. His actions may not have been in the best interests of familial harmony, but viewed from a more pragmatic stance, it's very calculated. There's another agenda here.
@@Arkryal you just typed out a longer version of what he literally said, and said that you believed it was for a different reason, even though you just said in a longer version the exact same thing as what he did
meanwhile in europe : i spent your uni funds i'm so sorry ... meh it's only 10K
Story 1: Bro, it is better if you don't threaten me, if you do then you can go to hell for all i care doesn't matter bs like blood ties when you were the one who abandoned me first
The thing I find is that those Ivy League schools carry a lot of wait and open doors especially if you have good grades to back it all up
@@LordePhantom Firstly your talking about story 2. Secondly, while true Ivy league schools will open doors. Once you get your first job and get your experience, no one will care what school you went to. Better to get a scholarship to an average college and spend that 200k on a house.
@@AllEy3s0nMe
With the way things are flying my arse would go to community college and probably put some for my future
If you how to fix your car you dont need a mechanic
Dont jump to therapy for every little thing
It will make you guys depended
Therapy is a service a business they will recommend it but take charge of your life
icl the tipping thing is culture thing we dont really tip in the uk unless it is round off a note like if the total is 55 quid you leave 3 twenties
there's restaraunt jobs in NA where if you're not getting tipped you're pretty much not getting paid. This is mostly at restaraunts fancy enough your food gets carried to your table. Don't tip, expect resentment and shenanigans.
Just how much was this guy tipping that he ran out of money though!? Probably unreasonable amounts
The fact my name is justin and i like to spend money is just 🗣️🗣️🗣️💀💀💀
Amazing mother, horrible father. FTG
What specific parkour minecraft map is this btw?
How do you spend 170k and ur partner doesn’t notice
2nd story: It's a bit strange that he didn't give her a chance. Addiction is a serious thing... Anyways, strange story...
yeah but sometimes you just have to let people go
I'm confused is it his step-brother or his half brother, he states his step-brother was born after his dad remarried so wouldn't that make him his half-brother.
Can someone actually tell me why they just resell the shopping items or the mercedes or what not somewhwre or the other, cuz i find it extremely stupid for not just sellong all those expensive pieces of crap. Couldve released the burden somewhat, really
The guy in Story 2 is just as bad as his wife, demands terms are met and breaks his word anyway
Honestly, it sounds like he was just doing that to protect himself and Cassie. He was afraid Andrea would do something drastic and since she had already broken trust, he wanted to prevent any possibility of her messing things up more than she already did.
I do admit, that I personally feel it is a bit weird that he decided he is a pushover if he does not divorce her rather than at least trying to help her through therapy, I can only assume there were many more issues previously that he did not mention in his posts and this was rather the straw that broke the camels back.
If this was the first major issue he had with her though, I don't see why you can't try a bit harder to make things work if you love her, then again, she tried some shady shit after she was caught, I would have more sympathy if she did not try and avoid accountability and even attempting to have him take accountability for her actions in her stead after she got caught.
I really don't understand story one and why the original poster cares if her dad disinherited her from his inheritance like I get why the original poster is doing it because however much money the dad is going to hand over from his inheritance understandably is probably going to be life-changing but yet the fact that the original poster literally states that she wants nothing to do with her dad and she knows he's a piece of crap I don't understand why she just let him back into her life so easily just because him and her had one emotional moment between each other but she couldn't see that he was still that same person going forward when she asked for his stepson to be living in her house and her life literally becoming a living hell going forward just because of the inheritance I know for a fact if I was in that situation I would try to put up with a two just to like get the money out of it but that's going to be for such a long time so at the same time I feel like fuck I might just get out of there and just be like screw this I'm not going to deal with this shit even if I get disowned by the dad and don't get to have it as inheritance
story two feels fake because how can she have been taking it for over the years but he never saw any withdrawals???
St 2: So wife wants to take someone down with het
how much are your colleges charging you that you need $200000 to avoid debt
well she wants to go to an Ivy League.. so
Is not step is half brother
It means the same though.
Story one seemed made up to me for some reason.
Stepbrother or half-brother?
Collegefund evaporating
Hell no, i would not be taking the fall for that … no way
I would be selling anything and everything bought with the money and is viable to be sold.
All the sell your shit apps here i come
So, OP's wife in story 1 got sexually harassed by Justin's drunk friend when he trashed the house but she is demanding he pretends to like the brother for what? I'm getting gold digger vibes from her.
well he apparently has no significant money so can't really say she's a gold digger but it does appear like she's concerned about the inheritance, which most people would be to varying levels.
Or she's like most wives who don't want to be responsible for their spouse breaking contact with family. She knows how much OPs dad means to him, and so she was ready to ignore harassment for him.
Good thing OP is a better man than his father because he didn't allow that for his wife
Why do you call your half brother your stepbrother you share a dad so that makes him your half brother not your stepbrother
So dad is a deadbeat who somehow gets to play the victim?
That's what Cassie gets for being a Billie Eilish fan
Lol, I will say tho it kinda feels like he's jumping the gun and this looks like a problem that could be fixed together. Maybe it's just me being naive, but the divorce seems kinda extreme.
Hiiii❤
🕶️🐹🔪
3:35 Was on the OP's side and shook my head when he said he wasted food, but when he said the waitress WANTED a tip, I saw OP as the alien here.
You don't demand or ask for a tip, you should get one if the person feels like giving one. A tip is a nice charitable gesture, not an expectation.
You still don't make FUN of the waitress for wanting a tip, not okay.
If that brat was acting as entitled for the waitress as he was for OP, she deserved a HUGE tip!
yeah no. the way north america works, you don't tip them, they're not getting paid at all.
Second story is womens nature in a nutshelllllll