I’ve seen some narcissistic couples up close. I don’t know how they did it, but they would agree on giving a public appearance of success and stability. Meanwhile, all the time, behind the scenes it was non-stop bickering, gossip, schemes to steal each other’s assets, not talking for weeks at a time - a power struggle more petty than anything I ever saw on a soap opera.
@Adam Johnston If you were in the house, you would find out the story pretty quickly and there was always the chance you might witness an argument, which could be heated or subtle and bitter depending on the day.
Seriously it’s so weird! They maintain their image while being fully into literally bout to kill people be another and then in the next second they are smiling and getting alone
Your every single word is 100% spot on.. I know this exactly because I am a daughter of a narcissistic couple. Its all about appearance and image and nothing is deep, intimate and actually worthy of being jealous. Hypocrisy, hypocrisy & hypocrisy .. nothing else..!
About this topic of 'what if two narcissists got together': there is no "what if" with this - it really happens, and let me tell you how disastrous and devastating it plays out. Two narcissists getting together is hell: I am the product of two malignant narcissists as parents, and come from a narcissistic family tree that is rotten to the core and needed to be chopped down in my life. I consider myself a graft, or something: I have barely survived this, and others have not. Two narcissists who get together often have children to use and exploit for and as supply - as well as pets - and these narcissists participate in horrendous and insurmountable child abuse, maltreatment, and neglect. Please, please, please: get this. The relationship between the two narcissists often only last together depending upon how much supply that they are still deriving from the offspring and pets - who they often see as slaves to them. Please read Elan Golomb's "Trapped In the Mirror" if you haven't, yet.
I am a child of a grandiose narcissist father and covert narcissist mother. Endured their mental torture for 29 years. Moving out now. Will they keep each other busy or will they keep chasing after me? What do you think?
My ex narc's NS is a narcissist and it just makes me think of the lyrics from a Bob Seger song...."he used her, she used him, but neither one cared, they were getting their share "
My malignant covert narcissist ex-husband had a girlfriend while we were still married and he got her pregnant and we divorced. She turned out to be a covert narcissist and she made his life a living hell. He deserved exactly what he got from her. He died suddenly from a pulmonary embolism and I was shocked that she was so cold about his death.
My ex covert narcissist cheated with another covert narc that was leaving notes on his car, all the while knowing he was in a long term relationship. We broke up and she showed up on his door step claiming she lost her apt and was going to be homeless even though she had a dozen relatives living in town. In less than a month she was pregnant. Her cousin told me this girl baby trapped him because her last boyfriend didn’t want to have a baby with her. She wanted my ex to marry her but he refused. He had a high paying job. He didn’t want to have a baby but she had it and refused to work, demanded an allowance. Then stopped intimacy after the baby was born. My ex was reaching out to be the entire time but I refused to meet with him. He cheated on her with someone else. They had a toxic relationship and when he lost his high paying job and told her she’d have to work, she left him and is now taking him to the cleaners. Good people do not deliberately break up relationships those are more often than not narcissistic people. Not always but a majority of the time
Everything you say is true Eva, and there is a lot of wisdom in your advice. In my life I’ve seen it just as you described. Fortunately, by the time I was discarded I had already seen the game, so I could protect myself. My attractive female somatic covert narcissist ex found an attractive male somatic grandiose narcissist. But they both needed to stay open to secondary sources of supply, so their relationship was polyamorous. It was superficially wonderful for them. They made each other look good (the halo effect). But emotionally it is empty, artificial, manipulative, dishonest and sick.
You are such a kind hearted gentle soul. I really admire and look up to you. You're one of my favorite go to's. Thank you for this episode. I hope that you are doing well.
I listened to this knowing I have 2 narcisstic parents. I'm the youngest of 3 kids. They tortured my sister and even smeared her post mortem (she died 7 years ago, and there will be forever unanswered questions to that). She was 15 years older than me. My brother, I believe is on the psychopathic spectrum, 11 years older than me. So, it makes sense that i fell into these dynamics with others. I wonder if I am a narcissist all the time, because how can I not be, coming from this cult like family system? But I feel. I hurt. I've loved too. I care. They are now targeting me in a way that makes it urgent for me to go no contact. I have been accepting financial support over the last few years, and since I got out of there when I was 17 (I'm now 37), I believe I accepted their help as love. I've fallen into fear and learned helplessness, but since I know I survived that horrific "childhood," I know I've done it before. I also have likened it to narcisstic "frienemies" who have flaunted their narcisstic cohorts after they devalued me. I am sick as to who these sperm and egg donors were. They've triangulated me, too, with a downstairs neighbor in my building who is psychopathic, who they know has hurt me because I told them. Trying to move on and sever the ties with self care, and learning to love myself. That I *have* a self. They will never say sorry, admit to their gaslighting, and I know now, that they actually know what they're doing (versus others having had told me, "It's just the generation" or "they don't know any better." Thank you.
I'm so sorry to hear about what you went through and your sister. I think it's common to have low empathy or hyperempathy in that situation. Psychopathy is genetic, sociopathy is more environmental.
I believe a couple to be a somatic and cerebral pairing. They stroke each other's egos in different ways, but the fights and anger toward one another is off the chart at times. It's like they live for the fight. Then they pretend it's just a quirk of theirs, and no one could ever handle their relationship. "You're just too sensitive. He's just joking." When it comes to friends they are always trying one up. The spotlight can never be off them for too long. Because of this they have cycled through so many friends.
Adam Johnston she blocked me a long time ago , but stayed friends with all my friends , family and our kids . That is where I was getting info . Kids don’t want to see her now iether .. 😔I am sad for them that she discarded us all . But such is life . We are well together 😊
So glad you did this video! I've been pondering this topic for 2 years. Everything you said was spot on, and I needed this little reminder, thank you ♥️
Your message makes a lot of sense to me, especially about social media strategy to protect yourself, properly disconnecting from those people and not giving margins for comebacks.
Two narcs of any kind will never last before someone gets hurt . Just like two "so called normal people" never last together in general. In the beginning couples can have fun but usually once the golden period has past it becomes a relationship of toleration and who can take the most abuse is what it boils down to. With narcs It is a degrading type of relationship with lots of mental anguish and a variety of abuses. People are people and everyone has their own bullshit and baggage I mean EVERYONE.
HI! Where are you going looking so nice. :) I'm envious of the stylish and cosmopolitan. Two narcissists in a relationship. I imagine that being a shit-show. I watched that trending show *Tiger King* and that is what I imagine a double-narc relationship being like. Constantly one trying to leverage the other. Their dependence on an image is laughable, their immediate weakness. And it's true that that is how they attract people (like you said, it's an evolutionary trait of people). Even an image of being spiritual, but their image does not sync with their underlying intent. It's so bizarre how they're not exhausted by it. What seems to exhaust and flummox them, and anger them, is when someone is on to them. I know I complimented your looks, but I know you're more than that. All the work you do here is for a greater good. Thank you.
I realize I knew two people who were narcists. One stayed for the millions of dollars and the other stayed because he liked the way the woman looked. It is a very explosive situation. I was triangulated in the middle of iit. He would ask she is in San Francisco for example right. She likes this man right. I said he has to ask her. They yell at each other and are very abusive.. I am out of the picture. They can control each other. I think most narcissists if they go together the rest of us are saved....So true. They didn't trust each other. She would look at his phone to see what is going on.
Thanks for another great video and yes this is exactly what they do and it takes awhile before you can see the truth but it will show up you'll notice that the New Supply after some time will began to stock you and want to know how your life is because her so called perfect life with your ex is crumbling the same way your life crumbled with that Asshole!!!
I met my ex girl friend we were together for yrs it's was ok for long time. I never new what a narcissist was until my girlfriend told me about her grandma. being an extreme narcissist when she came down to live in the same state. Oh boy she sure was right how she talked about every body all day if her lips are moving it was about what she knows and anything negetive she had on someone . Well my girl friend found a friend. And my girlfriend started using meth with this friend . And but before I new she was using meth I didn't realize the change at first but I noticed she started to hate me . And raging on me all day . Let's just say I kinda didn't make it out ok these days i stayed thinking I can help her that it not her in away I still believe that. The meth trigerd her just like her grandma . I went threw some extreme trauma I wanna say .crazy embarrassing like I can't talk about I feel stuff with her . And there completely heartless about it . I still talk to her she still on meth it's . But she like the devil in the way she will rub anything and every thing in my face ruthless I wanna say with it . Am kinda smart I guess I think but kinda dumb to but she always thought and kinda every one els I never feel like I am trust me . So now thats she's trigered into this disorder am her target for everything . It don't matter what I say what I do am wrong and she's against me about it and I can say the sky is blue and she would come up with something to say against it. I mean I've been watching these video about narcissism and man she is a text book case her and her grandma are textbook cases for everything like they have every trait. It's so bad . She really messed me up no lie I have so much anger built up inside of me from it all that I have not been able to function yet in normal society. It's crazy how they can't see how their narcissist because she shows me things about narcissist all day still when she's around and talks about her grandma and I'm like and I'm like you're just like your grandma now like the drugs have triggered you into this disorder and she's had schooling in the disorders and addiction and all that and crazy how she's can't see it it's crazy how they can't see it how extreme she is .it's even turned her whole look about her differently she doesn't even look like her . So if anyone or if you're still with me after all this LOL my questions to you is is narcissism hereditary and can it be triggered by drugs since she's had schooling I asked her that question and she denies it that no it's not possible and she even tells me about some forms and stuff you know the textbook narcissist. It sucks because she's so nice everyone else and I don't know she targets me only and the intelligence she thinks I have which she never wins a conversation LOL and it pisses her off more and she leaves.
Oh and what made me find your video is now she is staying with her grandma they extreme narcissist and her an extreme narcissist so I was wondering how is that going to work out
And the sad part about it is was crazy I didn't realize it my mother is a narcissist extreme narcissist yeah have had no counseling yet and now I see why I'm so messed up
Oh and threw seeing my ex how she watches these videos and how she makes her self out the expert . And to maybe some extent she is even though she can't see that she is herself I guess I feel like I have to be careful because narcissists are kind of intelligent about it and they know people know about it and it's in their world so they want to learn all about it that the experts themselves are the narcissists as well in some cases I guess some of these videos I watch and I think to myself they are the ultimate narcissist and people don't even realize it and you're just listening to a narcissist explain what a narcissist is.. I don't know ,just a crazy thought and feeling that I have may or may not be true
I'm a narcissist and I've tried out the empathy direction they were boring and I ditched them,a narcissist needs another narcissist to get what we need a little piece of another narcissist, although I'm a criminal narcissist that is in pursuit of a female narcissist that's been convicted of homocide,and me an her are 100% identical personalities and characteristics, so I'd say it's the most even narcissistic relationship that could exist.a narcasist just wants thier narcissist partners body and vice versa
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I’ve seen some narcissistic couples up close. I don’t know how they did it, but they would agree on giving a public appearance of success and stability. Meanwhile, all the time, behind the scenes it was non-stop bickering, gossip, schemes to steal each other’s assets, not talking for weeks at a time - a power struggle more petty than anything I ever saw on a soap opera.
@Adam Johnston If you were in the house, you would find out the story pretty quickly and there was always the chance you might witness an argument, which could be heated or subtle and bitter depending on the day.
I guess in there nobody gets hurt because they can’t be hurt 😂
Seriously it’s so weird! They maintain their image while being fully into literally bout to kill people be another and then in the next second they are smiling and getting alone
@@rickaster wisdom detected. Please lets connect at ruclips.net/user/doctorsammybaya .
@@emyywolf why do you think so
Your every single word is 100% spot on.. I know this exactly because I am a daughter of a narcissistic couple. Its all about appearance and image and nothing is deep, intimate and actually worthy of being jealous. Hypocrisy, hypocrisy & hypocrisy .. nothing else..!
Yes, there is no ability to self reflect or even simulate empathy, so their hypocrisy is lost of themselves
Fake as hell literally
@@RedPillDiaries wisdom detected
@@stevenclark5682 lets connect
About this topic of 'what if two narcissists got together': there is no "what if" with this - it really happens, and let me tell you how disastrous and devastating it plays out.
Two narcissists getting together is hell: I am the product of two malignant narcissists as parents, and come from a narcissistic family tree that is rotten to the core and needed to be chopped down in my life.
I consider myself a graft, or something: I have barely survived this, and others have not.
Two narcissists who get together often have children to use and exploit for and as supply - as well as pets - and these narcissists participate in horrendous and insurmountable child abuse, maltreatment, and neglect.
Please, please, please: get this.
The relationship between the two narcissists often only last together depending upon how much supply that they are still deriving from the offspring and pets - who they often see as slaves to them.
Please read Elan Golomb's "Trapped In the Mirror" if you haven't, yet.
You are spot on!! I really feel bad for the children it’s really sick
I am a child of a grandiose narcissist father and covert narcissist mother. Endured their mental torture for 29 years. Moving out now. Will they keep each other busy or will they keep chasing after me? What do you think?
My ex narc's NS is a narcissist and it just makes me think of the lyrics from a Bob Seger song...."he used her, she used him, but neither one cared, they were getting their share "
Or the movie/song "Thin Line Between Love & Hate". I can't see it ending well for one of the narcs in a narc/narc relationship.
My malignant covert narcissist ex-husband had a girlfriend while we were still married and he got her pregnant and we divorced. She turned out to be a covert narcissist and she made his life a living hell. He deserved exactly what he got from her. He died suddenly from a pulmonary embolism and I was shocked that she was so cold about his death.
Interesting and sad
😯
I’m so happy you got to witness that! Haha whew deuces 🤷🏼♀️
@@90charim please lets connect
So coverts are more dangerous than malignant
My ex covert narcissist cheated with another covert narc that was leaving notes on his car, all the while knowing he was in a long term relationship. We broke up and she showed up on his door step claiming she lost her apt and was going to be homeless even though she had a dozen relatives living in town. In less than a month she was pregnant. Her cousin told me this girl baby trapped him because her last boyfriend didn’t want to have a baby with her. She wanted my ex to marry her but he refused. He had a high paying job. He didn’t want to have a baby but she had it and refused to work, demanded an allowance. Then stopped intimacy after the baby was born. My ex was reaching out to be the entire time but I refused to meet with him. He cheated on her with someone else. They had a toxic relationship and when he lost his high paying job and told her she’d have to work, she left him and is now taking him to the cleaners. Good people do not deliberately break up relationships those are more often than not narcissistic people. Not always but a majority of the time
Everything you say is true Eva, and there is a lot of wisdom in your advice. In my life I’ve seen it just as you described. Fortunately, by the time I was discarded I had already seen the game, so I could protect myself.
My attractive female somatic covert narcissist ex found an attractive male somatic grandiose narcissist. But they both needed to stay open to secondary sources of supply, so their relationship was polyamorous.
It was superficially wonderful for them. They made each other look good (the halo effect). But emotionally it is empty, artificial, manipulative, dishonest and sick.
That is what I witnessed happen as well; except he was also violent towards her.
Precisely!
@@raerae2885 tell me more
So Mr. and Mrs. Smith were just playing themselves.
You are such a kind hearted gentle soul. I really admire and look up to you. You're one of my favorite go to's. Thank you for this episode. I hope that you are doing well.
Thank you...
I listened to this knowing I have 2 narcisstic parents. I'm the youngest of 3 kids. They tortured my sister and even smeared her post mortem (she died 7 years ago, and there will be forever unanswered questions to that). She was 15 years older than me. My brother, I believe is on the psychopathic spectrum, 11 years older than me. So, it makes sense that i fell into these dynamics with others. I wonder if I am a narcissist all the time, because how can I not be, coming from this cult like family system? But I feel. I hurt. I've loved too. I care. They are now targeting me in a way that makes it urgent for me to go no contact. I have been accepting financial support over the last few years, and since I got out of there when I was 17 (I'm now 37), I believe I accepted their help as love. I've fallen into fear and learned helplessness, but since I know I survived that horrific "childhood," I know I've done it before.
I also have likened it to narcisstic "frienemies" who have flaunted their narcisstic cohorts after they devalued me.
I am sick as to who these sperm and egg donors were. They've triangulated me, too, with a downstairs neighbor in my building who is psychopathic, who they know has hurt me because I told them.
Trying to move on and sever the ties with self care, and learning to love myself. That I *have* a self.
They will never say sorry, admit to their gaslighting, and I know now, that they actually know what they're doing (versus others having had told me, "It's just the generation" or "they don't know any better."
Thank you.
I'm so sorry to hear about what you went through and your sister. I think it's common to have low empathy or hyperempathy in that situation. Psychopathy is genetic, sociopathy is more environmental.
I believe a couple to be a somatic and cerebral pairing. They stroke each other's egos in different ways, but the fights and anger toward one another is off the chart at times. It's like they live for the fight. Then they pretend it's just a quirk of theirs, and no one could ever handle their relationship. "You're just too sensitive. He's just joking." When it comes to friends they are always trying one up. The spotlight can never be off them for too long. Because of this they have cycled through so many friends.
Great advice ❣️stoped following her a couple months ago . And this helps me not even want to go back to look .😊
Adam Johnston she blocked me a long time ago , but stayed friends with all my friends , family and our kids . That is where I was getting info . Kids don’t want to see her now iether .. 😔I am sad for them that she discarded us all . But such is life . We are well together 😊
So glad you did this video! I've been pondering this topic for 2 years. Everything you said was spot on, and I needed this little reminder, thank you ♥️
Your message makes a lot of sense to me, especially about social media strategy to protect yourself, properly disconnecting from those people and not giving margins for comebacks.
Two narcs of any kind will never last before someone gets hurt . Just like two "so called normal people" never last together in general. In the beginning couples can have fun but usually once the golden period has past it becomes a relationship of toleration and who can take the most abuse is what it boils down to. With narcs It is a degrading type of relationship with lots of mental anguish and a variety of abuses. People are people and everyone has their own bullshit and baggage I mean EVERYONE.
Sadly I have to totally agree with you
So nice to see you. Love you.
🤗
@Adam Johnston Thank you!
HI! Where are you going looking so nice. :) I'm envious of the stylish and cosmopolitan.
Two narcissists in a relationship. I imagine that being a shit-show. I watched that trending show *Tiger King* and that is what I imagine a double-narc relationship being like. Constantly one trying to leverage the other.
Their dependence on an image is laughable, their immediate weakness. And it's true that that is how they attract people (like you said, it's an evolutionary trait of people). Even an image of being spiritual, but their image does not sync with their underlying intent. It's so bizarre how they're not exhausted by it. What seems to exhaust and flummox them, and anger them, is when someone is on to them.
I know I complimented your looks, but I know you're more than that. All the work you do here is for a greater good. Thank you.
I realize I knew two people who were narcists. One stayed for the millions of dollars and the other stayed because he liked the way the woman looked. It is a very explosive situation. I was triangulated in the middle of iit. He would ask she is in San Francisco for example right. She likes this man right. I said he has to ask her. They yell at each other and are very abusive.. I am out of the picture. They can control each other. I think most narcissists if they go together the rest of us are saved....So true. They didn't trust each other. She would look at his phone to see what is going on.
really needed this video
Thanks for another great video and yes this is exactly what they do and it takes awhile before you can see the truth but it will show up you'll notice that the New Supply after some time will began to stock you and want to know how your life is because her so called perfect life with your ex is crumbling the same way your life crumbled with that Asshole!!!
😂 correct and spot on
I met my ex girl friend we were together for yrs it's was ok for long time. I never new what a narcissist was until my girlfriend told me about her grandma. being an extreme narcissist when she came down to live in the same state. Oh boy she sure was right how she talked about every body all day if her lips are moving it was about what she knows and anything negetive she had on someone . Well my girl friend found a friend. And my girlfriend started using meth with this friend . And but before I new she was using meth I didn't realize the change at first but I noticed she started to hate me . And raging on me all day . Let's just say I kinda didn't make it out ok these days i stayed thinking I can help her that it not her in away I still believe that. The meth trigerd her just like her grandma . I went threw some extreme trauma I wanna say .crazy embarrassing like I can't talk about I feel stuff with her . And there completely heartless about it . I still talk to her she still on meth it's . But she like the devil in the way she will rub anything and every thing in my face ruthless I wanna say with it . Am kinda smart I guess I think but kinda dumb to but she always thought and kinda every one els I never feel like I am trust me . So now thats she's trigered into this disorder am her target for everything . It don't matter what I say what I do am wrong and she's against me about it and I can say the sky is blue and she would come up with something to say against it. I mean I've been watching these video about narcissism and man she is a text book case her and her grandma are textbook cases for everything like they have every trait. It's so bad . She really messed me up no lie I have so much anger built up inside of me from it all that I have not been able to function yet in normal society. It's crazy how they can't see how their narcissist because she shows me things about narcissist all day still when she's around and talks about her grandma and I'm like and I'm like you're just like your grandma now like the drugs have triggered you into this disorder and she's had schooling in the disorders and addiction and all that and crazy how she's can't see it it's crazy how they can't see it how extreme she is .it's even turned her whole look about her differently she doesn't even look like her . So if anyone or if you're still with me after all this LOL my questions to you is is narcissism hereditary and can it be triggered by drugs since she's had schooling I asked her that question and she denies it that no it's not possible and she even tells me about some forms and stuff you know the textbook narcissist. It sucks because she's so nice everyone else and I don't know she targets me only and the intelligence she thinks I have which she never wins a conversation LOL and it pisses her off more and she leaves.
Oh and what made me find your video is now she is staying with her grandma they extreme narcissist and her an extreme narcissist so I was wondering how is that going to work out
And the sad part about it is was crazy I didn't realize it my mother is a narcissist extreme narcissist yeah have had no counseling yet and now I see why I'm so messed up
Oh and threw seeing my ex how she watches these videos and how she makes her self out the expert . And to maybe some extent she is even though she can't see that she is herself I guess I feel like I have to be careful because narcissists are kind of intelligent about it and they know people know about it and it's in their world so they want to learn all about it that the experts themselves are the narcissists as well in some cases I guess some of these videos I watch and I think to myself they are the ultimate narcissist and people don't even realize it and you're just listening to a narcissist explain what a narcissist is.. I don't know ,just a crazy thought and feeling that I have may or may not be true
Yes it can be hereditary . I too have witnessed drug use trigger people
I'm a narcissist and I've tried out the empathy direction they were boring and I ditched them,a narcissist needs another narcissist to get what we need a little piece of another narcissist, although I'm a criminal narcissist that is in pursuit of a female narcissist that's been convicted of homocide,and me an her are 100% identical personalities and characteristics, so I'd say it's the most even narcissistic relationship that could exist.a narcasist just wants thier narcissist partners body and vice versa
Damn right on point ♥️
This is a late comment, but can 2 narcissists in a relationship become fatal? As in murder/suicide?
Hello, thank you!
You're welcome!
Did you mean to say people with Borderline are narcissists? Because they’re two different personality disorders.
💕