I’m an ISTJ but funny enough, I find “disruptive forces” to be attractive. I tend to gravitate towards daredevil free spirits who are also intellectual.
Bruh you summed up my type in a sentence. I couldn't put it into words but you captured it eloquently. I'm an ISTJ too by the way. Currently crushing on an INTP...
This is so true. It took me six months to convince my ISTJ husband to try a new restaurant that I had already been too and loved. His reason for not wanting to try it? He had never been there before! That kind of circular reasoning is not easy to overcome.
My ISTJ grandma is like this. I’ve gotten her to try all sorts of new restaurants by letting her eat something at home she knows she likes for dinner, and then ordering out for myself and getting an appetizer, entree, and dessert I know we both like. Then I give her some of my food. She’s okay with trying new things, it seems, so long as she’s not in the spotlight.
I did land navigation recently with an ISTJ, basically we had to use a map, a protractor, and a compass to find locations in the woods in the dark with headlamps. She was very good at initially establishing a plan on how to hit those points on the map, I was mostly just following her lead. Then when we set out into the woods it was mostly me leading the way, trusting my intuition, barely getting flustered when a path wasn't there that was "supposed to be there". She was pleasantly surprised as she thought I was kinda dumb since I wasn't planning thoroughly. I'm an INTP btw. However I think we complemented each other very well because her planning ahead gave some sort of structure I obviously would've struggled coming up with in a short period of time, such as counting how many steps it would take, which road to be on, etc
Hahaha! There must really be something in the air lately, that’s drawing our ISTJs deep into nature. I’m deep in the woods right now, with my ISTJ, as well! We just got married in the sunset last night. He planned EVERYTHING and it was absolutely magical! I’m an INFJ, btw.
ISTJ here who has such a soft spot for ESFPs and ESTPs and it's because the ones in my life have always been able to tease me about my little eccentricities and quirks whilst also being respectful of them. (in other words, I don't get on their nerves, haha) Love your videos and thank you for making them!
I got my ISTJ grandma to try fried Oreos at the carnival because she still got her funnel cake, which she loves, and then I gave her a bite of a fried Oreo and now she loves those too. As long as she can still have what she likes and wants, she’s willing to be adventurous.
I think you’ve nailed it. My ISTJ son and I (INTJ) have always had a good relationship and I imagine it probably has a lot to do with me instinctively understanding most of this. Of course there is vast pleasure in eating mac and cheese for the 1000th time, but here are some bacon bits if you want to shake things up. And I’ve already warned him he will be joining us on whatever adventure INFJ grandpa cooks up 2 out of 7 days of our vacation in 4 months.
I’m an ENFP who sorely misses her ISTJ soulmate who passed away in 2020 🥺 One of my favourite games to play was to guess what my husband would order from a restaurant. He was adorably predictable and I knew him so well. I was only ever wrong once, and that’s because it was a work lunch where I wasn’t aware that the other person was paying (in which case he chose his favourite, expensive option 😄). I miss him every day. Anyone in love with an ISTJ, hold onto them tightly xx
Same here... at the gym right now, listening to this. Used to think my old man was an ISTJ. Now I'm sure he is an ISFJ. Either way he makes a mean meatloaf - ESTP 8w7
I absolutely need my routine and don’t like my environment to change… I like knowing exactly what is happening and exactly where everything is. Great video!
Yes. The concept of 'let's wing it' is an overwhelming idea. If I'm going to 'wing it', then could you provide exactly what that entails and what I'm supposed to do during this 'winging time' :p
ISTJ with very high F feeling - For us a bad plan is better than no plan. Then we can mentally be prepared ahead for the event will not go so well. We can also search/plan ahead for possible supplement alternatives or slight adjustments to someone else's bad plan. A bad experience will not crush us emotionally or such dramatically nonsense like that. If it requires too much effort and energy to turn a bad plan into a great plan, we will not waste that energy. We are logical people and know that not everything or every event will be perfect. The key is "time to mentally prepare ahead for whatever will come", so that we can adjust, be flexible in our expectation and follow others' bad plan while gently nudging it to the direction which we think we will make it less of a bad plan. As we age, we come to the realization that not everyone is organized or efficient as us. "Not everyone is a great/exceptional worker like you, you can't compare others to your standard." - my former manager commented some version of this line to me. It's not detrimental and world shattering if disruptive events happen. We just prefer routines and plans simply so that we so that run head on and get things DONE, or not done if we are feeling lazy and lack motivation. Reasoning: When things are out of whack, which happens often and every week at work, we loose times in thinking up new ways to get things done.
Thank you Nathan. It's a big Yes to me. As an ISTJ, to have people that value that 'structure' and 'over-communicating'. I was mad when an ESTP close friend broke their promise to go to the meal (I planned to pay), it's about my graduation congratulation and i wanted to share with 2 close friends (ISTP and ESTP) (back story that I very much treasured them to pay this meal (70%), because I choose not to go to the Graduation Ceremony at Uni). But in the last minute, the ISTP friend got sick, couldn't make the promise. And all I asked is the postponed date where the meal can happen, I let them please pick for me a time (the need for schedule here). But the ESTP told me she saw my 'attitude' when I texted in the group chat, and she was busy for work and for the trip. I tried to call her but fail, with so many calls, not a pick-up one. Cause the person refused to communicate, it was the dead-end for me to know more about their 'details' of life, they stop my way of gaining more data to make any judgement. The ESTP friend told me she won't go, told me to cancel the meal or just go with the ISTP friend - due to my 'attitude' in text (Text are bad source to make any judgement about 'attitude'). This completely derailed me, as their 'Fi blind' clashed with my Fi, and my 'Fe blind', as they thought, clashed with their Fe. So we ended up not being close friends. I captured the story in my diary but i got anger and unfriend on FB. After she like a post on my Insta, I asked her to accept to friend request or i just took it back. And she told me to took it back. I'm still friend with the ISTP friend. So I think, it's their choice to not being friends, and I just judge on the 'data' they gave me. 'Healthy' is not just a trait of MBTI. Someone doesn't know about MBTI but can still act good. I'm open to all new 'data' (Si) or 'possibilities' (Ne), ready to listen to the person, to make the most right judgement I can, cause I know we ISTJ never got enough data to encounter new situations to solve. But the 'data' they gave me told me I just gotta leave the relationship for the better, to both of us. I know about the 'Fe blind' and I tried to combine 'Te + Fi = Fe' for the situations that need. But sometimes people thought i was imperative - which, well, I extroverted through Te and Ne, so that's somehow inevitable. I just wanna try the most effective solution for whatever the problem that needs - and sometimes that involves with, well, people. :)
Wtf. There's millions of houses, thousands of cities in this world. These beuracrats dominant society we lived in are full of ISTJ lol. School, hospital and any kind of rule-established jobs we have, I feel like it's the creation of ISTJ (the idea) and to place all ISTJ there. (sorry if way too stereotypical).
I saw this vid first thing this morning when I woke up in this ultra secluded cabin in the woods beside a beautiful lake. My ISTJ brought me here to marry me! This video is *such* an affirming sign! Now we’re about to head out for a nice afternoon canoe trip. 🤖💚👽 ISTJ 💚 INFJ
@@marycamerlengo - Thanks! Any helpful tips? I feel like we’ve done fairly well, but it took awhile for us to figure each other out. Learning how to communicate properly with each other was what really changed things for us in *big* ways. That’s very possibly why we’re even still together, content and happy.
Please.. when you describe INTJs as "controlling", people imagine that we dominate and control the free will of other people.. but in my case, it is simply that I want to control the amount of sugar in my diet, so I cook my own food at home. There are specific things I want from my wardrobe - and if I can't find them in the stores, or can't afford to have them custom-made, I will sew them myself. (multiply this by a lifetime) I am under no illusion that I have the ability or energy to control what other people do... but I will make life as easy as I can if someone wants to fall in with my plans for things.
you are hilarious. thank you. I am a facilitator of a different set of temperament profiles, but I use your videos on 16 personalities to add humour to my couples sessions. ENFJ👋
“If they trust the decision you make will go down well, then they’ll be much more inclined to follow you down more weird and wonderful paths in the future.” Thats what my ISTP husband had to do when we first started dating. Baby step suggestions…now I feel like I can go down those weird and wonderful paths with him, but yes…baby steps are the key lol
i know my husband loves me so much *ISTJ and im madly in lvoe with him (ENFP) i honestly love where he lets me run free like a horse be a dreamer, yet he helps me so much w the things i dont like about myself (being disorganized etc) but the part about trying new things but not to the extreme is very on point! I feel i've introduced him to cooking which i love and he wasnt in before but showed how it can be done in his ISTJ ways and its something weve found we love to do together! also i do not judge him about things, i love that we are different! but i guess thats the ENFP in me LOL
I don't know how ISTJ ended up being "the most common" type. In my entire life I have met only one true ISTJ -- a family member. This family member is truly loyal, reliable, steadfast, dutiful, and all those other characteristics of a typical ISTJ. I have never met any one like that. Of course, I can't know each and every person's type, but it looks like the majority of ppl I've come across in my life consist of a bunch of ENFPs, ENTJs, ESTJs, maybe, a few ISTPs here and there, quite a few ESTPs (mostly as highly annoying neighbours), but I have never ever met ISTJs (and yes, I think INTJ, INTP, and INFJ are fairly rare, indeed). In my opinion, ISTJ should be right there with INFJ, INTP, INTJ in terms of 'rarity.'
Get out more maybe. ISTJs and ISFJs are literally everywhere. Maybe you are a type that is naturally very compatible with them and so their presence is not jarring for you.
I am INTP and my wife is ISTJ. No "seduction" needed. We just fell into the calm, loving relationship from the start with no drama, no whirlwind. It just keep getting stronger and better, too.
I'm a female ISTJ and the only man who perked my ears recently was a gay man describing how he came out to his parents. He presented a case where he explained the history of homosexuality. He sounded like he was in court arguing, very well, for his case. It truly moved me and made me think, something that I desperately desire but just don't ever experience. I guess what I'm saying is, I wonder if this video is for men who are ISTJs because really nothing can seduce me at this point in my life.
Wow that’s cool! So the cognitive function pairing is an interesting match! ESFP has Se, Fi, Te and Ni inferior then ISTJ has Si, Te, Fi and Ne inferior. I can see that being really solid!
I'm starting to think that the character for my book is no longer an ISTJ.... he was at the start of developing it, but now.... He hates plans, rules and everything related. So.... I need to reevaluate him....
"To seduce a type, make use of and target their inferior function" : that's interesting, but in my case (ENFP), I can't imagine any activity flattering my low Si that would be seducing. Any ideas ? 💡
@@freregregoire2685 Well, that's also what I had been imagining, but I don't think I could be seduced by the fact that someone is taking care of my physical needs, like inviting me for dinner, for example. But now I am thinking about other types of sensations, it's true that dancing with someone could be very seducing?... But I am much more sensitive to conversations and activities that stimulate my intuition and involve feelings.
Do ENFPs care about nostalgia then? Since Si is basically your past (more complex than that I know). Like someone playing music or a movie from when you were younger and maybe dancing to the music, would that be more enjoyable than someone taking care of your needs?
I'm ENTP myself, so also a NE user. Maybe to us it is more like to just pick one of our crazy ideas and just plan for it. Some secret surprise and try to force us to stick to it and not back off in the very last minute. We are more of brainstormers than executors. But there should be room for some spontaneous NE action also. Sometimes I talk, think and research a lot about activities but then end up to do no one. Mostly because I jump from one idea to the other and find a lot of pro and cons and stay stuck in this circle.
@@ellem8990 Good point ! That's true, I would probably feel very charmed if someone started to play a music I know and like. But I am wondering if this wouldn't be more linked to Fi than Si. I mean, I would maybe be more sensitive to this attention because it feels romantic and beautiful, than because it's reactivating old memories and sensations... Interesting, I need to think about it 😃 Thank you!
Based on the test done in college, I appear to be a perfect ISTJ/ISFJ, and I believe that I live my life accordingly. Multiple time I have suddenly surprised people with dramatic changes that I planned thoroughly ahead of time. Even people who know me very well will be shocked, whether it is a new restaurant, moving to a new residence, or deciding to take a four hour drive for a book.
I would say a real partner would be someone who makes themself fit into my routines and plans, so that I am able to stay in control of my life. I used to like ENTPs/ESTPs/ESFPs but I don't want to date or marry one because they disrupt my methods and flow too much. I'll stick to ISFJs and another ISTJ if I can find one IRL. 😆
I’m looking forward to that one too. Perhaps as a teaser: Listen to our big picture world-shaping ideas without getting blown away or thinking it’s silly. Take care of all the details-but have us research all the possibilities- at a new (intellectually stimulating) vacation spot. Handle the bills/groceries/reservations so we can focus on making the environment/experience extraordinary. Gentle sensory gifts (candles, chocolate, back rubs) for no reason without asking (I forget to ask and feel selfish if I ever do think about it) make us feel cherished not used.
what’s your dynamic like? as an enfp i’ve noticed i don’t have many istj friends or partners because i feel like there’s such a huge gap in the way we function and communicate
@@kikicupcake711 he’s very blunt and sarcastic, and more quiet. But unlike a lot of istjs, he isn’t annoyed by my hyper activity or random puking out ideas. He finds our differences to be fascinating, so do I! Sometimes he can sound irritated when I can’t focus well in conversation or do something silly in public, but I will laugh at how serious he sounds and then he will end up laughing about it too 😂 I guess he’s not AS MUCH of a hard ass as the istj stereotype
My 25 yo ISTJ is fairly different than the 55 yo version I am now. At 25, I couldn’t calm down if the towels were folded “wrong”! Now, I just need an outline of plans ahead of time mostly so I can muster the energy it will take to “do the things” (travel, hike, shopping trip, you get it). As long as I’m with a smart capable person, I can let go and roll with what comes at us. The real hitch is when I don’t have confidence in the other person’s common sense and judgment, (I’m always prepared for a worse-case scenario and I think it’s careless not to be 🤷🏻♀️). Experience has taught me there will ALWAYS be a disruption of plans so lowering expectations is a must - even better is to not have any. Nathan, you are absolutely right, when other’s over communicate their thoughts, ideas, expectations that may change the outlined plan, I find it VERY thoughtful, even kind and respectful. That mixed with intelligence, playfulness, and sharp wit is a winning combination in my book!
sounds very similar to the ISTJ in my life. You, guys, seem to relax a bit with time and age, being with the right and trustworthy person certainly helps. I like ISTJs a lot (even though they do tend to be very worked up over "incorrectly" folded towels :)).
I like how everyone says that istj is the mоst common type in the world but I didn't meet any other istj who isn't me before Thanks world, I appreciate it
I usually dont comment but when you say chaotic and disrruptiv and i am Entp( The god of Chaos ) currently in a Realationship with an Istj. Laughed alot tho : Hard life 😂❤
It could happen since si is about comfort >>laziness and fi is about feelings >>mood , so they could be that lazy type that is never in the mood to do anything .
I'm an ISTJ and like Nathan said, we find it attractive when people respect our need and value for structure, organization, privacy, and consistency. We hate people who are being overfamiliar with us in order to get us to like them. That's not the way. We can spend a good day on our own but if you so much would like to get to know us more and appeal to us, try bringing/suggesting new things to the table. We're really drawn to that (we're not quite good at compelling ourselves to indulge on something entirely new but we fixate on the idea). However, make sure that whatever new thing you present to us, will not in any way dominate or overtake the structure we already had for the day. Like suggesting a new side dish. We like the details, y'know.
I'm an INTP but for some damn reason any time I like anyone they tend to be INFJs or ISTJs (as well as ENTPs, ENTJs, INTJs, and ENFPs). I guess I understand the rest but ISTJ caught me off-guard. A weirdly high number of people or characters I end up liking tend to be ISTJs which I find funny since they would probably not stand my lifestyle. I also tend to go off on tangents all the time and love learning and exploring the most useless things. Maybe it's the fact that they tend to have qualities that I kinda need in my life to be less useless.
i see tons of INTP and ISTJ pairings in the comments... but do y'all think INFP is compatible with ISTJ? i'm an INFP who keeps falling for ISTJ's and i can't seem to find much info on this pairing anywhere
I have several INFP coworkers and while I adore them, I don’t know if I could date any of them. It might just be the ones I know but they’re super sensitive and I always walk away from conversations feeling as though I’ve wounded them when that is not my intention at all. I would feel like I was walking on eggshells all of time, and nobody wants that. They are all super sweet people and really good listeners, though. I try to return the favor as much as possible. They are my favorite NF type, and second favorite feeler, after ISFJ. -an ISTJ
@@erinl422 wow, thanks for the detailed comment! i can totally understand your point of view, seeing as i was once that super sensitive INFP myself 😅 but i do feel like i've outgrown it (mostly). I also know a couple ISTJs who are overly rigid and serious, which puts me off romantically, but some of yall can be so thoughtful, caring and goofy, and i love that. I guess every type has its different... well, types. hahaha
'You have to inject a little bit of chaos and disruption, without being too chaotic or disruptive' As an ENFP I found that offensive XD!! No way I can do that.
It's important to remember that MBTI is pop-psychology and sometimes underlying disorders cause people to type a certain way. Regarding ISTJs and "controlling", my immediate thoughts were OCD, OCPD, and autistic traits. Not to say that's always the case, but the MBTI community is full of people who rationalize their untreated mental health issues.
I’m an ISTJ but funny enough, I find “disruptive forces” to be attractive. I tend to gravitate towards daredevil free spirits who are also intellectual.
Bruh you summed up my type in a sentence. I couldn't put it into words but you captured it eloquently. I'm an ISTJ too by the way. Currently crushing on an INTP...
@@idiotka172 So like an intp myself? 😀
@@bhavyashokeen8106 Hmm I don't know you so I can't say!
@@idiotka172 Funny enough I ve been dating an istj for 6 months. But I'm starti g to realize that maybe I'm too introverted for her...
Same 10000%. I love xxTPs lol
How to seduce an ISTJ:
**Pulls out rulebook**
*Istj suddenly appears* "I have been summoned."
This is so true. It took me six months to convince my ISTJ husband to try a new restaurant that I had already been too and loved. His reason for not wanting to try it? He had never been there before! That kind of circular reasoning is not easy to overcome.
May i know what's your type?
@@febphoebe - I'm an INFJ.
My ISTJ grandma is like this. I’ve gotten her to try all sorts of new restaurants by letting her eat something at home she knows she likes for dinner, and then ordering out for myself and getting an appetizer, entree, and dessert I know we both like. Then I give her some of my food.
She’s okay with trying new things, it seems, so long as she’s not in the spotlight.
I did land navigation recently with an ISTJ, basically we had to use a map, a protractor, and a compass to find locations in the woods in the dark with headlamps. She was very good at initially establishing a plan on how to hit those points on the map, I was mostly just following her lead. Then when we set out into the woods it was mostly me leading the way, trusting my intuition, barely getting flustered when a path wasn't there that was "supposed to be there". She was pleasantly surprised as she thought I was kinda dumb since I wasn't planning thoroughly. I'm an INTP btw. However I think we complemented each other very well because her planning ahead gave some sort of structure I obviously would've struggled coming up with in a short period of time, such as counting how many steps it would take, which road to be on, etc
Hahaha! There must really be something in the air lately, that’s drawing our ISTJs deep into nature. I’m deep in the woods right now, with my ISTJ, as well! We just got married in the sunset last night. He planned EVERYTHING and it was absolutely magical! I’m an INFJ, btw.
@@janeofthejungle4 congratulations sound wonderful!
So don't change the restaurant last minute and don't disrupt the perfect meal by suggesting something waaaaay different. Ok got it 😊
ISTJ here who has such a soft spot for ESFPs and ESTPs and it's because the ones in my life have always been able to tease me about my little eccentricities and quirks whilst also being respectful of them. (in other words, I don't get on their nerves, haha)
Love your videos and thank you for making them!
I love my ISTJS!!!!
I got my ISTJ grandma to try fried Oreos at the carnival because she still got her funnel cake, which she loves, and then I gave her a bite of a fried Oreo and now she loves those too. As long as she can still have what she likes and wants, she’s willing to be adventurous.
That is so adorable, I could cry. 😭 I miss my grandma so much! 💕
Me, an ISTJ: why are there never any ISTJs in the comments :(
Also me: never comments
We're here 🤫
Literally something i would do 😅
ISTJs unite
Hello
I think you're the type who listens more than comments far and wide.
As an ISTJ this is pretty accurate. We value our schedule and time and need time to think through plans or have a foundation to go off of.
I am an ISTJ and this video is spot on in my case. I like some fun and new experiences but always within a context of order. Plans must be followed.
I think you’ve nailed it. My ISTJ son and I (INTJ) have always had a good relationship and I imagine it probably has a lot to do with me instinctively understanding most of this. Of course there is vast pleasure in eating mac and cheese for the 1000th time, but here are some bacon bits if you want to shake things up.
And I’ve already warned him he will be joining us on whatever adventure INFJ grandpa cooks up 2 out of 7 days of our vacation in 4 months.
You’re a great mom!
I’m an ENFP who sorely misses her ISTJ soulmate who passed away in 2020 🥺 One of my favourite games to play was to guess what my husband would order from a restaurant. He was adorably predictable and I knew him so well. I was only ever wrong once, and that’s because it was a work lunch where I wasn’t aware that the other person was paying (in which case he chose his favourite, expensive option 😄). I miss him every day. Anyone in love with an ISTJ, hold onto them tightly xx
As an ENTP, I have never clicked on a video so fast in my life
Same here... at the gym right now, listening to this. Used to think my old man was an ISTJ. Now I'm sure he is an ISFJ. Either way he makes a mean meatloaf - ESTP 8w7
holy shit I'm also a fellow ENTP wanting to seduce an ISTJ
I am an INTP and oooh I definitelly inject some chaos into my ISTJ partner's life
How did you two meet if you don't mind me asking?
I absolutely need my routine and don’t like my environment to change… I like knowing exactly what is happening and exactly where everything is.
Great video!
Yes. The concept of 'let's wing it' is an overwhelming idea. If I'm going to 'wing it', then could you provide exactly what that entails and what I'm supposed to do during this 'winging time' :p
ISTJ with very high F feeling - For us a bad plan is better than no plan. Then we can mentally be prepared ahead for the event will not go so well. We can also search/plan ahead for possible supplement alternatives or slight adjustments to someone else's bad plan. A bad experience will not crush us emotionally or such dramatically nonsense like that. If it requires too much effort and energy to turn a bad plan into a great plan, we will not waste that energy. We are logical people and know that not everything or every event will be perfect. The key is "time to mentally prepare ahead for whatever will come", so that we can adjust, be flexible in our expectation and follow others' bad plan while gently nudging it to the direction which we think we will make it less of a bad plan. As we age, we come to the realization that not everyone is organized or efficient as us. "Not everyone is a great/exceptional worker like you, you can't compare others to your standard." - my former manager commented some version of this line to me. It's not detrimental and world shattering if disruptive events happen. We just prefer routines and plans simply so that we so that run head on and get things DONE, or not done if we are feeling lazy and lack motivation. Reasoning: When things are out of whack, which happens often and every week at work, we loose times in thinking up new ways to get things done.
Your intelligence amazes me.
Would be curious to know what type you are.
Keep on the great work!
Thank you Nathan. It's a big Yes to me. As an ISTJ, to have people that value that 'structure' and 'over-communicating'.
I was mad when an ESTP close friend broke their promise to go to the meal (I planned to pay), it's about my graduation congratulation and i wanted to share with 2 close friends (ISTP and ESTP) (back story that I very much treasured them to pay this meal (70%), because I choose not to go to the Graduation Ceremony at Uni). But in the last minute, the ISTP friend got sick, couldn't make the promise. And all I asked is the postponed date where the meal can happen, I let them please pick for me a time (the need for schedule here). But the ESTP told me she saw my 'attitude' when I texted in the group chat, and she was busy for work and for the trip. I tried to call her but fail, with so many calls, not a pick-up one. Cause the person refused to communicate, it was the dead-end for me to know more about their 'details' of life, they stop my way of gaining more data to make any judgement. The ESTP friend told me she won't go, told me to cancel the meal or just go with the ISTP friend - due to my 'attitude' in text (Text are bad source to make any judgement about 'attitude'). This completely derailed me, as their 'Fi blind' clashed with my Fi, and my 'Fe blind', as they thought, clashed with their Fe.
So we ended up not being close friends. I captured the story in my diary but i got anger and unfriend on FB. After she like a post on my Insta, I asked her to accept to friend request or i just took it back. And she told me to took it back.
I'm still friend with the ISTP friend.
So I think, it's their choice to not being friends, and I just judge on the 'data' they gave me. 'Healthy' is not just a trait of MBTI. Someone doesn't know about MBTI but can still act good. I'm open to all new 'data' (Si) or 'possibilities' (Ne), ready to listen to the person, to make the most right judgement I can, cause I know we ISTJ never got enough data to encounter new situations to solve. But the 'data' they gave me told me I just gotta leave the relationship for the better, to both of us.
I know about the 'Fe blind' and I tried to combine 'Te + Fi = Fe' for the situations that need. But sometimes people thought i was imperative - which, well, I extroverted through Te and Ne, so that's somehow inevitable. I just wanna try the most effective solution for whatever the problem that needs - and sometimes that involves with, well, people. :)
How to seduce an ISTJ… Recommend a new side sauce 😂 💀
You came back to this series! I’m glad
Hey Mr. Nathan, so awesome you made a new one of these :D thanks and hope things are going well :)
Yeah… No plan is better than a bad plan. - ENTP
There's no way ISTJ is the most common. People hardly act like it!
Wtf. There's millions of houses, thousands of cities in this world. These beuracrats dominant society we lived in are full of ISTJ lol. School, hospital and any kind of rule-established jobs we have, I feel like it's the creation of ISTJ (the idea) and to place all ISTJ there. (sorry if way too stereotypical).
I saw this vid first thing this morning when I woke up in this ultra secluded cabin in the woods beside a beautiful lake. My ISTJ brought me here to marry me! This video is *such* an affirming sign! Now we’re about to head out for a nice afternoon canoe trip.
🤖💚👽
ISTJ 💚 INFJ
I am an INFJ married to an ISTJ, and I saw this comment on our 26th wedding anniversary. :) Congrats you guys!!!
@@marycamerlengo - Thanks! Any helpful tips?
I feel like we’ve done fairly well, but it took awhile for us to figure each other out.
Learning how to communicate properly with each other was what really changed things for us in *big* ways. That’s very possibly why we’re even still together, content and happy.
My husband, ENFP: "Why are you in a bad mood?"
Me, ISTJ: "How dare you just leaving the table not telling me where you are going?"
I laughed out loud so bad.
Please.. when you describe INTJs as "controlling", people imagine that we dominate and control the free will of other people.. but in my case, it is simply that I want to control the amount of sugar in my diet, so I cook my own food at home. There are specific things I want from my wardrobe - and if I can't find them in the stores, or can't afford to have them custom-made, I will sew them myself. (multiply this by a lifetime) I am under no illusion that I have the ability or energy to control what other people do... but I will make life as easy as I can if someone wants to fall in with my plans for things.
*ISTJs not INTJs
@@AK-jt7kh INTJs were mentioned. They are not the main type being discussed, but they are mentioned. As being "controlling".
you are hilarious. thank you. I am a facilitator of a different set of temperament profiles, but I use your videos on 16 personalities to add humour to my couples sessions. ENFJ👋
“If they trust the decision you make will go down well, then they’ll be much more inclined to follow you down more weird and wonderful paths in the future.” Thats what my ISTP husband had to do when we first started dating. Baby step suggestions…now I feel like I can go down those weird and wonderful paths with him, but yes…baby steps are the key lol
i know my husband loves me so much *ISTJ and im madly in lvoe with him (ENFP) i honestly love where he lets me run free like a horse be a dreamer, yet he helps me so much w the things i dont like about myself (being disorganized etc) but the part about trying new things but not to the extreme is very on point! I feel i've introduced him to cooking which i love and he wasnt in before but showed how it can be done in his ISTJ ways and its something weve found we love to do together! also i do not judge him about things, i love that we are different! but i guess thats the ENFP in me LOL
I don't know how ISTJ ended up being "the most common" type. In my entire life I have met only one true ISTJ -- a family member. This family member is truly loyal, reliable, steadfast, dutiful, and all those other characteristics of a typical ISTJ. I have never met any one like that. Of course, I can't know each and every person's type, but it looks like the majority of ppl I've come across in my life consist of a bunch of ENFPs, ENTJs, ESTJs, maybe, a few ISTPs here and there, quite a few ESTPs (mostly as highly annoying neighbours), but I have never ever met ISTJs (and yes, I think INTJ, INTP, and INFJ are fairly rare, indeed). In my opinion, ISTJ should be right there with INFJ, INTP, INTJ in terms of 'rarity.'
I agree with you and I hardly see any info on ISTJ either
@@Therealsoso10 unfortunately, yes - very little info about them
I'm an INFP and I feel left out 😔
@@Therealsoso10because they can be internet despiser, and conventional jobs orientated, that's why you don't find them much here or their info.
Get out more maybe. ISTJs and ISFJs are literally everywhere. Maybe you are a type that is naturally very compatible with them and so their presence is not jarring for you.
I am INTP and my wife is ISTJ. No "seduction" needed. We just fell into the calm, loving relationship from the start with no drama, no whirlwind. It just keep getting stronger and better, too.
Awesome
I'm a female ISTJ and the only man who perked my ears recently was a gay man describing how he came out to his parents. He presented a case where he explained the history of homosexuality. He sounded like he was in court arguing, very well, for his case. It truly moved me and made me think, something that I desperately desire but just don't ever experience. I guess what I'm saying is, I wonder if this video is for men who are ISTJs because really nothing can seduce me at this point in my life.
You just described how you were seduced.
Im enfp and my friend is istj and even though we are completely different we find something that make as wanna to spend time together.
My brother is an ISTJ and his wife is ESFP
Wow that’s cool! So the cognitive function pairing is an interesting match! ESFP has Se, Fi, Te and Ni inferior then ISTJ has Si, Te, Fi and Ne inferior. I can see that being really solid!
I'm starting to think that the character for my book is no longer an ISTJ.... he was at the start of developing it, but now.... He hates plans, rules and everything related. So.... I need to reevaluate him....
"To seduce a type, make use of and target their inferior function" : that's interesting, but in my case (ENFP), I can't imagine any activity flattering my low Si that would be seducing. Any ideas ? 💡
Si is tied to hunger, thirst, comfort. So, chocolate, good meal, stuff like that, how does that sound?
@@freregregoire2685 Well, that's also what I had been imagining, but I don't think I could be seduced by the fact that someone is taking care of my physical needs, like inviting me for dinner, for example. But now I am thinking about other types of sensations, it's true that dancing with someone could be very seducing?... But I am much more sensitive to conversations and activities that stimulate my intuition and involve feelings.
Do ENFPs care about nostalgia then? Since Si is basically your past (more complex than that I know). Like someone playing music or a movie from when you were younger and maybe dancing to the music, would that be more enjoyable than someone taking care of your needs?
I'm ENTP myself, so also a NE user. Maybe to us it is more like to just pick one of our crazy ideas and just plan for it. Some secret surprise and try to force us to stick to it and not back off in the very last minute. We are more of brainstormers than executors. But there should be room for some spontaneous NE action also.
Sometimes I talk, think and research a lot about activities but then end up to do no one. Mostly because I jump from one idea to the other and find a lot of pro and cons and stay stuck in this circle.
@@ellem8990 Good point ! That's true, I would probably feel very charmed if someone started to play a music I know and like. But I am wondering if this wouldn't be more linked to Fi than Si. I mean, I would maybe be more sensitive to this attention because it feels romantic and beautiful, than because it's reactivating old memories and sensations... Interesting, I need to think about it 😃 Thank you!
As an ISTJ is find this crazy how he pictures my paradise, word for word😅
Based on the test done in college, I appear to be a perfect ISTJ/ISFJ, and I believe that I live my life accordingly. Multiple time I have suddenly surprised people with dramatic changes that I planned thoroughly ahead of time. Even people who know me very well will be shocked, whether it is a new restaurant, moving to a new residence, or deciding to take a four hour drive for a book.
I am married to an ISTJ. This is very accurate.
I would say a real partner would be someone who makes themself fit into my routines and plans, so that I am able to stay in control of my life. I used to like ENTPs/ESTPs/ESFPs but I don't want to date or marry one because they disrupt my methods and flow too much. I'll stick to ISFJs and another ISTJ if I can find one IRL. 😆
Hahahhaha you should be a comedian, so witty
Ok, if intj/istj similarity is spoken out that loud, then maybe we will finally get a video with INTJ/ISTJ comparison.
This might be helpful in the future. - ENTP
Surely words to live by.
That looks like a job for ENTP, especially that disruptive force.
Pls do how to seduce INTJ. Than you
I’m looking forward to that one too. Perhaps as a teaser: Listen to our big picture world-shaping ideas without getting blown away or thinking it’s silly. Take care of all the details-but have us research all the possibilities- at a new (intellectually stimulating) vacation spot. Handle the bills/groceries/reservations so we can focus on making the environment/experience extraordinary. Gentle sensory gifts (candles, chocolate, back rubs) for no reason without asking (I forget to ask and feel selfish if I ever do think about it) make us feel cherished not used.
I’m an enfp dating an istj and it’s freaking awesome
what’s your dynamic like? as an enfp i’ve noticed i don’t have many istj friends or partners because i feel like there’s such a huge gap in the way we function and communicate
Yea I would love to know what the dynamic is like!
@@kikicupcake711 he’s very blunt and sarcastic, and more quiet. But unlike a lot of istjs, he isn’t annoyed by my hyper activity or random puking out ideas. He finds our differences to be fascinating, so do I! Sometimes he can sound irritated when I can’t focus well in conversation or do something silly in public, but I will laugh at how serious he sounds and then he will end up laughing about it too 😂 I guess he’s not AS MUCH of a hard ass as the istj stereotype
My 25 yo ISTJ is fairly different than the 55 yo version I am now. At 25, I couldn’t calm down if the towels were folded “wrong”!
Now, I just need an outline of plans ahead of time mostly so I can muster the energy it will take to “do the things” (travel, hike, shopping trip, you get it).
As long as I’m with a smart capable person, I can let go and roll with what comes at us.
The real hitch is when I don’t have confidence in the other person’s common sense and judgment, (I’m always prepared for a worse-case scenario and I think it’s careless not to be 🤷🏻♀️).
Experience has taught me there will ALWAYS be a disruption of plans so lowering expectations is a must - even better is to not have any.
Nathan, you are absolutely right, when other’s over communicate their thoughts, ideas, expectations that may change the outlined plan, I find it VERY thoughtful, even kind and respectful. That mixed with intelligence, playfulness, and sharp wit is a winning combination in my book!
sounds very similar to the ISTJ in my life. You, guys, seem to relax a bit with time and age, being with the right and trustworthy person certainly helps. I like ISTJs a lot (even though they do tend to be very worked up over "incorrectly" folded towels :)).
@@zzc8505 😂🥰😂
I have no social skills😢
I like how everyone says that istj is the mоst common type in the world but I didn't meet any other istj who isn't me before
Thanks world, I appreciate it
in my personal opinion, ISTJs are very rare
It's funny because I was patiently waiting for my type, and was shocked when the video ended- INFP
I usually dont comment but when you say chaotic and disrruptiv and i am Entp( The god of Chaos ) currently in a Realationship with an Istj. Laughed alot tho : Hard life 😂❤
Do you have an istj brother that procrastinate a lot
It could happen since si is about comfort >>laziness and fi is about feelings >>mood , so they could be that lazy type that is never in the mood to do anything .
Hello dear ISTJ friends lurking here, what would you say you find attractive in people?
I'm an ISTJ and like Nathan said, we find it attractive when people respect our need and value for structure, organization, privacy, and consistency. We hate people who are being overfamiliar with us in order to get us to like them. That's not the way. We can spend a good day on our own but if you so much would like to get to know us more and appeal to us, try bringing/suggesting new things to the table. We're really drawn to that (we're not quite good at compelling ourselves to indulge on something entirely new but we fixate on the idea). However, make sure that whatever new thing you present to us, will not in any way dominate or overtake the structure we already had for the day. Like suggesting a new side dish. We like the details, y'know.
Listening skills. The moment I sense you are not listening to me, that's it.
Punctuality. Also similar morals, and taste in films.
I'm an INTP but for some damn reason any time I like anyone they tend to be INFJs or ISTJs (as well as ENTPs, ENTJs, INTJs, and ENFPs). I guess I understand the rest but ISTJ caught me off-guard. A weirdly high number of people or characters I end up liking tend to be ISTJs which I find funny since they would probably not stand my lifestyle. I also tend to go off on tangents all the time and love learning and exploring the most useless things. Maybe it's the fact that they tend to have qualities that I kinda need in my life to be less useless.
Can this be a series if it isn’t already?
WAIT 2 years ago you did these
Everything I’ve seen says ISFJ is the most common. I know it’s a small point, but the F vs T is a decent difference.
Is anybody even in the Discord group?
Response to video 😫 I can’t do it my brain would explode
Yes , finally -istp
i see tons of INTP and ISTJ pairings in the comments... but do y'all think INFP is compatible with ISTJ? i'm an INFP who keeps falling for ISTJ's and i can't seem to find much info on this pairing anywhere
I have several INFP coworkers and while I adore them, I don’t know if I could date any of them. It might just be the ones I know but they’re super sensitive and I always walk away from conversations feeling as though I’ve wounded them when that is not my intention at all. I would feel like I was walking on eggshells all of time, and nobody wants that. They are all super sweet people and really good listeners, though. I try to return the favor as much as possible. They are my favorite NF type, and second favorite feeler, after ISFJ. -an ISTJ
@@erinl422 wow, thanks for the detailed comment! i can totally understand your point of view, seeing as i was once that super sensitive INFP myself 😅 but i do feel like i've outgrown it (mostly). I also know a couple ISTJs who are overly rigid and serious, which puts me off romantically, but some of yall can be so thoughtful, caring and goofy, and i love that. I guess every type has its different... well, types. hahaha
They both actually have the same functions, just different order. They can be compatible. Im drawn to their stability.
'You have to inject a little bit of chaos and disruption, without being too chaotic or disruptive' As an ENFP I found that offensive XD!! No way I can do that.
please have a facebook page
Personally I think this over exaggerates the control and planning oriented traits of ISTJ. One size does not fit all.
Isn't ISFJ the most common type?
❤
MAKE AN ENFJ ONEEEEE
mm, sounds like too much work-intj
Oh so treat them like a small child, okay got it
Im a little bit offended but also where is the lie. - ISTJ
@@gekkoberry371 🤣
@@gekkoberry371so true lmao
It's important to remember that MBTI is pop-psychology and sometimes underlying disorders cause people to type a certain way. Regarding ISTJs and "controlling", my immediate thoughts were OCD, OCPD, and autistic traits. Not to say that's always the case, but the MBTI community is full of people who rationalize their untreated mental health issues.
This is cringe 🤨