MONTESSORI AT HOME: Independent Sleep
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- Опубликовано: 30 сен 2024
- MONTESSORI AT HOME: INDEPENDENT SLEEP // Discover practical ideas on how to approach sleep training from a Montessori perspective. Ashley also shares her personal journey in helping her toddler to achieve independent sleep.
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#montessori #parenting #sleeptraining
I think about 50% of us aren't even close to having kids... 😂😂😂
Yet, the amount of information in your channel is sooo helpful, important and beautiful!
I'd love to see an updated version of everything you learned in round 2 with Mia!! Xxo
Yassss pleaseee 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
Me too .... im so tired
Yes please!
Yes!!! I’m in a pretty similar boat right now as you were in this video! I have two kids (one toddler and one 9 month baby) whom I fallen into the same rut of nursing to sleep. The first one still comes into my bed in the middle of the night. Very much hoping for an updated video of how Mia’s sleep training went!
Please do!
maria montessori was a trained doctor, an avid observer of children and a mother... all this combined makes me think she probably wouldn't support anything CLOSE to cry it out. todays psychologists and child development experts (even neuro-scientists!) speak widely on the benefits of attachement/relationship style sleeping where the child will feel the strongest bond with the parent, and develop into a more secure and independent person. there are many articles and even research that shows the harm of child isolation and cry-it-out methods. honestly, i don't think maria montessori would support something like this. this type of child independence is more of a modern, american convenience for parents i regret to say... it isn't necessarily the best thing for child development. i know many won't like what i'm saying, but it's in the data, in the research and in the hands of experts that study children, their brains, their development and their overall, long term growth and well being. here's one such example: www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/moral-landscapes/201112/dangers-crying-it-out
Agreed to this comment! In my country bonding is very important.
i have to mention this, too: my friend who was a montessori school guide (teacher) told me that sleep is taught by MODELING. the children and teacher would all lay down and the teacher would show the kids, essentially, how to fall asleep. this is cosleep, folks. this is how it works biologically and developmentally. montessori methods make sense, even though sleep wasn't exactly covered by maria, i think it goes without saying that we continue the method of supporting their learning by being present and modeling it for them. co-sleeping really does work that way!
greatCabbageAge238 wait. She didn't use the cry it out method did she? Thought she stayed with the child until the child fell asleep ?
Thanks for sharing this article!
Ann Betsa agree. She did the opposite of the cry out method.
She didn’t leave her daughter to cry for hours on end.
She did it in stages, allowed checking and provided support and comfort.
Big difference to shutting the child away to cry for hours until they’re exhausted and fall asleep from that vs being tired.
In case no one has told you today,
You are a great Mom ❤️
Thanks, Haley. 😊
My personal preference is to sleep with my baby it's alot more natural and comforting for baby and mum.
same. best sleep we've all ever had! it's so much easier and sweeter and makes for great sleepers!
Yes I was thinking the same think
@@olgasavestheday I am paralyzed with fear at the thought of sleeping with my baby. We know from research that co sleeping and bed sharing can lead to death by SIDS. I can't get that statistical truth out of my head. I would be riddled with horrific guilt for the rest of my life if anything happened.
@@fighttheevilrobots3417 that's not true. in India we sleep with our babies and SIDS is almost unheard of. You will be there with your baby anytime they need you. It is relaxing for mom too as she doesn't have to go to her babies nursery again and again.
@@fighttheevilrobots3417 actually we know from researches that there is no danger, as long as all conditions are checked, like no smoking, no drugs, no obesity, no big comforter or blanket on the child, nor big pillows, sleep on a firm mattress (not a sofa or inflatable mattress). Extra rules for the first months : the baby should be near the mum who can check on her baby all night long even asleep, but not near the dad who has not the same instinct, the mum and the dad won't have the same blanket for the same reason. But that is true if you nurse your baby only
Mmm.. I have to disagree with nursing to sleep being a "nasty" sleep association. It's completely normal and healthy.. though it does suck for us mamas lol. But I'm totally going to be trying these methods out because this mama has been trying to wean for about a year now. 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
I meant “nasty” as in a VERY strong association, not gross. 😊 I agree that it is 100% healthy and normal! 👍🏻
@@HapaFamily oh ok 😂 I was gonna say. I was really shocked when you said that. 😂
I probably should have worded it differently, lol. Thanks for watching!
To wean my 15mo (I still dry nurse from time to time) it really helped that dad is now in charge of sleep. He puts her on his shoulder and she's right off to sleep! I got pregnant again when she was 10 months and a half and my production stopped a few weeks after that, plus my breasts got super sensitive... And she got SO mad that I had no milk. I hope you managed to wean! ♥️
I love nursing my 11 month old to sleep. It’s such a sweet time to snuggle up together and I watch his little body slow down and his eyes gently shut. Once he’s asleep I pick him up and rock him for a few moments and feel the full weight of his body before I lay him down. It’s so special to me as I know these special snuggles are limited and he’ll be a big boy very soon.
Just a word of advice about the floor beds:
Be sure to take opportunities to prop them (the mattresses) both up so the underside can air out. Having the mattresses directly on the floor without any kind of slats to raise them up and promote air flow can actually lead to mold growth. [Also remove any waterproof protectors you might use regularly; moisture can get trapped INSIDE and again, promote mold growth. I speak from experience.]
We live in a very dry climate, and Kylie has been on floor bed for 2 years without any mold issues. With that said, we do still check weekly each time we wash and change the sheets. :) However, for those of you who live in a wetter climate and have legitimate concerns about this, there are other options available to help raise the bed off the floor slightly to prevent this issue (while still keeping it as a floor bed). Here’s a great example of one that I would personally use if this were a concern: sprout-kids.com/products/low-montessori-floor-bed-for-toddlers Hope this helps! 😊
We have had a floor bed for 1.5 years, and last winter when our heating broke actually got a little mold on the walls around the windows. Never around the mattress tho. We air her room regularly, try to keep it at a stable temperature, and pick up the mattress weekly. Just keep an eye on it. Or a nose. The smell is the first to tell.
So true. Idk why nobody talk about it !!
A mattress need air under it. Humans sweat so much during sleep.
Sound advice! 🙏
Question: What did you do when Kylie woke up in the middle of the night and you weren't there? And did that even happen?
I have the same concern!!
We did the Ferber method with our daughter at I think 6 months (let cry for 2 minutes, go check on her, let cry for 5 minutes, etc) and as hard as it was to let her cry, it helped to have a timer, like "ok only 3 more minutes and then I can go touch and sooth her" and within 2 or 3 days she was goimg to bed just fine, no crying 9 times out of 10.
Now she's waking up a little earlier so blackout curtains seem like a good idea!
Nurse to sleep is not a nasty sleep association. It’s very normal and biologically appropriate. They all stop nursing to sleep when they’re ready all on their own. Don’t need to fight it, that just creates a whole extra level of stress. If it doesn’t feel right it’s because it isn’t. When you take away nursing you lose your best and most reliable strategy to get them to sleep. So now you’re having to replace it with one thing and then another thing with all this effort that could’ve been saved, and not to mention zero crying. I’m so sorry you’ve been told nurse to sleep is bad for your child and that it influenced your journey. We all end up at the same end goal and we can all get there without the upset. Sleep is important yes but it’s not like they’re getting more sleep or Better sleep when sleeping alone, quite the opposite happens. Babies and toddlers are meant to and do wake frequently and nursing to sleep is what supports their development as it’s both nourishing and minimises time spent awake as they can re settle quickly.
Anyone else noticed she said “the new normal” a year before covid? Prophetic
I am so appreciative for you talking about your struggle with the sleep association. I too have struggled on and off with my daughter and breastfeeding to sleep. You come across as a very strong and “have it altogether” mom so it is so refreshing to hear you be real about the hard parts about being a mom..you help me feel like I am doing a better job than I think I am!! Thank you so much Ashley
You are such a champion. Mentally filing this away for the future! Even though I don't have kids yet, I really love your videos because they are so thorough and easy to understand. Thank you for sharing all of your experiences!
It is always very interesting to see how the sleep "issue" is solved in so many different ways. The ideal solution for us is co-sleeping with our 18month old toddler. I still nurse him to sleep, he still wakes up multiple times during the night. Anyways, since we sleep all in one bed, I don't even notice when he nurses during the night and we have a similar sleep to as it was before having a baby. 👣👶 Besides that, we love sleeping in one bed and enjoy the cuddles. I am excited to see where our journey leads us and how long we will continue to be breastfeeding. 😍 I love your channel and all the videos on the Montessori approach! They are so well researched and interesting! 🤓 Greetings from Germany. 🇩🇪
We're in the same boat. I would like to see her address the parents who still breastfeed their child at night. I haven't watched all her vids, but it seems like she stops breastfeeding early on. Is there a solution later on for when parents wing them off?
Check out Andrea Olsen at Go Diaper Free, she recommends weaning off nursing to sleep at daytime naps which will help baby wean off nursing at night. Baby will be able to go back to sleep themself without needing to nurse.
Reisetagebuch congratulations! I’m still co-sleeping with my 19 month old and 5 year old! I’ve been nursing for 5 years! Co-sleeping and child lead weaning has allowed us to sleep 8-9 hours every night. Rested parents = happy parents.
Reisetagebuch Thank you for sharing this 💕 I can relate to your comment more than this video because I’m currently bed sharing with my almost 6 month old and It works great for us. I’m just thinking it’s time I try to put us on a schedule rather than just going with the flow ( I’m struggling to have a productive schedule for myself because I don’t know when or how many naps, and some nights it’s harder to get her to sleep, even with nursing)
@@kias7791 This is amazing. We love co-sleeping with our little one. It makes everything so easy.
Checking for mom 7-8 times to make sure she’s still there outside the door. 😭 Why is that making me cry?!!!!! It’s so freaking cute and sweet and innocent. Little humans are so precious
Me tooo 😢
Why should babies sleep by themselves? What's the benefit for children in being alone instead of cuddling and staying close to mum and/or dad?
Our baby sleeps with us in our bed during the night, but we can't stay with her when she naps during the day (3 times). If she stayed close to me, she would have far too many stimuli to be able to fall asleep.
Fithrildith that’s interesting. My baby is actually the opposite. I let him cuddle and stay with me for most day time naps but he sleeps in his own bed at night. He is also only 7 weeks and I know as he gets older and naps less frequent, we will have him also nap on his own.
I feel that it’s important to establish independence and it’s important that they sleep in there own space so that they get there best sleep and you get your best sleep
sabine meyer I was wondering the same ... I have been co sleeping with my baby since he was born , and always nurse him to sleep as that is what he wants to do ... they won’t need our help for long ... we should just follow they lead
I would say for my family the pros are: sleeping through the night, for parents and baby. My kids are kids that NEED a lot of sleep, so because we gently sleep trained, they have never gotten out of bed to come to us, they sleep through the night unless sick, too wet of diaper, or still feeding in the night as an infant. Also, I am a thrasher in my sleep and my husband is a very large man who sleeps through chainsaws, so it's also a matter of safety.
I’m high school student (and certainly very far from having children) but I’m glad I’m discovering these methods! I’m glad there are videos like yours online that I can use in however many years when I do have kids :)
I’m SO appreciative for this video right now. Your daughter sounds exactly like mine with what we’ve been through (first time mom here who has done exactly as you described) but I’m late to the disassociation work, just starting at 17 months. I write this after a two hour session trying to go down for nap and feeling so heartbroken after she finally went to sleep. Evenings seem surprisingly ok with fighting sleep but not crying. However, naps seems to be horrible and the fighting of sleep, longer. Thank you for being another parent who talked about this and picked me back up in the middle of it (while enduring insane fires & COVID 🤯😭).
I'm a new subscriber, this is the second video I watch and I have to say I feel tremendously identified and glad. I love I'm not the only one trying to raise a child this way. I'm still breastfeeding my 13 months old boy to help him sleep (we actually co-sleep) and I'm in the process of letting him on his own bed next to mine (not so easy). So thanks a lot for giving me ideas and hope! 🌺
I love all of your videos! I’m 6 weeks pregnant (first time mom) and so happy to have found your channel. I have a passion for a Montessori teaching/parenting style and you’ve really helped me understand it better! Thank you so much!!!
My kids are 10 and 6 and I wish I had exposure to this content in my first pregnancy. You’re ahead of the game! Great channel and a beautiful philosophy.
Hi! Would be really interesting to hear any updates about Mia's independent sleep situation! Hopefully, you plan on doing a similar video at some point in the future.
Thanks so much for sharing your experiences as a mom, Ashley!
Yes, ill be waiting for thar too. Thanks!
Nursing to sleep is not a horrible thing. It’s natural. I’ve successfully been able to do this with two kids so far. Eventually by 12-16 months they sleep on their own ❤️
I agree. I've always nursed mine to sleep and two of them coslept with me until later in toddlerhood. They want to nurse to sleep because it's comfort for them, they aren't even hungry usually, and it shouldn't be viewed as a bad habit. It's natural. It's security.
@chattykathy can you give some tips about nap time? Currently nursing to sleep for bed time... which is ok w me. But need to rock and baby wear for naps. Can’t get anything done.
@@emilygeorge5988 what do you do for nap time? Need help! Thanks!
@@Mei-gg1ns I would change their diaper, nurse them in their room instead of other parts of the house so they knew it was sleep time, lay them down and close the door to where I had a half a foot opening (the door open was signal to them for awake time and mostly closed meant sleep time but not closed to where they felt alone). This took a week or two for each of them to get used to and I’d have to go in a couple times in the beginning to quietly lay them back down when they called for me if they didn’t fall asleep while nursing. After that I was able to nurse and lay them down and they’d put themselves to sleep. Night time is different I always nurse them to sleep.
do you leave the white noise machine on the entire night or do you turn it off when baby is asleep?
Hi,
You said in this video that you follow a sleeping routine every time before putting your daughter to sleep. Could you give an example of sleeping routine?
Hello! 👋🏻 Thanks for watching! Our bedtime routine is typically dinner, bath, pjs/brush teeth, bedtime stories, and lights out. :)
You are a beautiful Mother ❤️
Thank you for making these videos. I found out a couple weeks ago that I’m pregnant and I’m really glad I found these and I’m glad I have this ability to prepare. I’m so excited to see your new content and I’m excited to learn from you, so, thank you :)
Idk I just couldn’t do this yet with my 4 month old... he’s still to young IMO
With my second baby I did
the "put down when still awake" method from day One 😂 because my First daughter learned to sleep completely alone at 5 y.o. 😱
I don’t think that’s what she is saying at all Nadia...I understand her statement completely. I screwed up my oldest child’s sleep in so many ways and he was also not able to fall asleep alone until close to 5 years old and struggled with sleep for a long time after that. So when my second son was born I did a lot of research and also did the awake to sleep. Not because I cared less but because I knew I needed to set my baby up for success and also not be a sleep deprived zombie myself.
I tried to do that from day 1 as well. She would wake up every time, other times just fuss/cry in her bed... solution still to be found 😅
I wished that worked for me. mine would pass out from trying and in the process smash her head on the crib I tried everything so I ended up co sleeping but she will only go to bed if I do. 😕
Hi there! Thanks for your great videos ! They are so helpful. I’m wondering more about achieving independent sleep with a Montessori floor bed set up. My 7 month old seems to get separation anxiety when I leave the room and crawls around the room crying until I come in. This can go on for quite some time too. She even goes to the door. It’s heart breaking and I can’t find any information out there for sleep training in a Montessori bedroom. I was wondering if you had any more information in addition to what you mentioned in this video. I am also doing this “gradual further away” method and letting her cry it out within reason. It’s heartbreaking and I find myself seeking more guidance for sleep training in a Montessori environment. Thank you so much!!
Did she ever make an updated version with strategies for Mia?
I was lucky with mine. She started putting herself to sleep at around 6 months. I watched this for #2 which I will be breast feeding for much longer. I'm sure it will not be nearly as easy. Thanks for the content!
Thank you for the video. I really want to try this but I'm so scared. My baby has made a strong boob to sleep association and if I would put her in bed awake she would not only cry but scream her lungs out. 🙄
I'm interested to know about your bed time routine. We already have a bath after diner but she goes to sleep at a different time every night and if I try to put her down before she's ready she will wake soon after. She already wakes several times in the night sometimes every hour and I feel like I'm going crazy not to mention feeling like I'm failing motherhood hard.
Hey, guessing this got better. Can you please tell me how?
Following. How has it been going?
Cry it out is super counter-productive to trust. It's been scientifically proven over and over that children's stress level do not go down when the tears stop all your child learns is you won't help so in fact they are learning not to trust you... Just food for thought.
That’s such bs. I have 2 kids. One was a good sleeper, the other wasn’t. I let him cry it out after all his needs were met. He finally slept through the night at 18 months. Other than sleep, he was the happiest, easiest, funniest, smartest, most enjoyable child imaginable, and is now a successful adult with whom I have a close, loving relationship. There was never a trust issue.
@@lessehead so you're scientific data of 1 says that you know more than science. Good to know let's go tell the presses to ignore all scientific data cause one kid seemed to not be affected negatively. 🤔
@@andreapatterson1482 Babies need to learn to self soothe. The Ferber method is just a nice way of putting it. If patting them on the back and then walking away makes you feel better, then do it, but it’s for the parent, not the baby. After you have determined that your baby isn’t wet, hungry, or sick, there’s not a whole lot left that you can do. I never co-slept with my kids because I believed that everyone sleeps best when in their own sleep spaces. My kids loved their rooms, and I needed private time with my husband and a good night’s sleep! Parents today seem to be so paranoid about everything! Kids don’t remember what happened when they were a few months old, and they will not learn “not to trust you”. That is pure silliness!
@@lessehead All of this is based on outdated/ incorrect information.... Again I base my practice in peer reviewed up to date science...
@@andreapatterson1482 The Ferber method is not outdated. It is what pediatricians are advising parents to use with problem sleepers now, and parents are swearing by it. You are making this much more complicated than it needs to be. Whatever works!
Thank you for this advice. I would like to ask how do you put your little one for a naps.
We always wondered what and how we should break the sleep association and our presence in the room. But at some point we thought about our own childhood. We talked to our friends and almost all of them got up at night regularly and went to our parents bedroom, because we just didn't want to be alone at night. So it was settled, we did what most Scandinavian countries do and introduced a family bed. Now we all just sleep together in one large bed. Sure... it's not always super great for sleeping when our little one has a bad night, but we never wanted to go through the process of weaning him into being alone. Most adults don't like sleeping alone, so I feel it's a bit tough to demand that of a young human being. Anyways, your channel is inspiring and your approach to making montessori work is impressive. I wish I could be even a fraction as disciplined and structured about it. All the best for your, your family and you channel :)
I like a lot of aspects of montessori but ill stick with co sleeping it makes my baby happy and content and breastfeeding at night is a breeze
I'm a mama to be in September. My sis did co sleeping and just stopped breastfeeding (my niece is 4!😆). I like the idea but it can be exhausting when she wakes to nurse a lot and not sleep through the night. I got a baby side bed and I'm not comfortable with letting baby cry..any advice? Tips?
@@dawnforlife my baby actually sleeps better in with me and a much deeper sleep because he knows im near and hes safe best tips would be research it a lot and follow all the guidelines so no pillows or blankets near baby and sleep in the C shape around them especially if bed sharing with your partner its best to have the on the side away from them to prevent rolling over onto them and befd side guards if you dont have it against the wall
@@dawnforlife and sometimes its best to just let baby cry i dont mean for ages either but s tired out baby will only cry for about 10mins max before falling asleep any longer than that something is wrong but as long as you stay next to them in the bed and soothe them with your voice as they cry its fine
For those desperate parents watching this, one of the most important things you can do is diagnose why your child isn't sleeping. There are countless reasons. Before embarking on any strategy, get the why figured out. This could range from sleep associations, to sleep disturbances, restless leg/iron deficiency, or anxiety or not being tired due to the schedule you've set up. Some solutions work for one reason but are counterproductive to other reasons. Dr Ferber's book will help you diagnose these issues. Whether or not you follow his solutions is a personal choice, but the diagnosis part is very informative.
Happiest baby on the block book was a gane changer for my son. He was sleeping through the night by 12 weeks and I exclusively breastfed. He is still an amazing sleeper now at 16 months. He has been sleeping 12-13 hours per night since he was about 9 months old. He naps throughout the day on a set schedule. He is definitely the happiest baby on the block.
Raishelle Meagher how did you get him to sleep through the night being breastfed?
Regan, getting on a set schedule during the day for naps,feeding and play then bedtime helped. I made sure he nursed efficiently during the day. I was crazy about our schedule and routine which was a bit of a sacrifice but I wasn’t willing to live with the consequences of not sticking to it. It all happened together honestly...everything was in place and the baby was living harmonious. All his needs were met so he just didn’t need to wake up to eat. Black out curtains, swaddling and sound machine were major contributing factors.
Raishelle Meagher will you please share your schedule of day naps and feeding? I have a three month old, exclusive breastfeeding baby, I really need to put him to schedule for feeding more than anything. As of now he sleeps 8-9 hours at night!
I would love your help on how you approach Mia's sleep this time around. I have a 7 month old in a floor bed and we struggle with her sleep. she fights sleep unless I hold her until she is basically asleep. she is only sleeping throughout the night for 3 hours at a time. I'd love some advice. btw I always look forward to all your videos. you are amazing!
oh man i feel Kylie's weening phase - doing this with my daughter too.
I don't mean to create negativity, I love your channel so far and I am a new subscriber and I think you are a wonderful mom, but I disagree with such an abrupt weaning. It cannot be "on the child's terms" if the child is crying (especially for 2-3 weeks like you say, even if it was for 1 day). Kylie was crying because she didn't want to wean, and definitely not like that. A toddler younger than 2 years of age does not want to wean on its own unless the mother drives breastfeeding towards that direction gradually. And the fact that you were planning a 2nd pregnancy did not mean you had to wean her; tandem is a reality in many families (and I understand it is a choice). In any case, there are IBCLC specialists who can show a mother the right way to wean, with respect to the baby's needs and feelings. I wanted to share this info since there is a plethora of mothers who are viewing and reading. Like I said, I thoroughly enjoy your channel!
I agree completely with you, but I am not really mad at her for saying what she said because she did mention in the beginning that she is just a mom, not an expert. If she claimed to be an expert, THEN I would be mad at her lol
I think she just wanted to stop nursing to sleep in anticipation of the new baby. Then she couldn't stop complete weaning off
Your channel is amazing and really helpful and still up to date in 2022! Thanks for all this content and advices.
When you sit in the room away from the bed, what do you do when the child comes to you? My daughter likes to play in her bed or in the room and fights sleep.
Please do a video on how you manage sleep with Mia! Thank you xx
I would love a video on you sleep routine! My husband and I never had one as children and it feels like we are just constantly guessing trying to find something that works for our daughter. Thank you for making these videos! ❤️
When Mia went to check if you were still outside the door, how did she check? And did you put her back in the bed or she went back on her own?
I saw your videos and tried my 2 yo to sleep independently last night. And we did it !!! I am soo happy she slept 10 hours, she did cries at 4:30, 5:30 and 7:00, first two times I didn’t go coz she stopped within a minute, however at 7:00 she cried much more so I went to her room and lay next to her for about 5 minutes and left her asleep again.
I would like to ask if she cries similarly, should I wait for her to cone out of bed to put her back or just go while she’s still on the bed to reassure her?
I am curious to know what exactly you are doing with your youngest to encourage independent sleep. I am due with my first child in november and would like to avoid the crib altogether and am curious to know how it is going for you 😊 thanks!
Thank you! I have a baby on the way and was already thinking about this, it's perfect. I love peaceful parenting xx
Can I just say, I like you SO much! You’re knowledgeable, welcoming and validating of others’ parenting experiences. I’m 20 weeks pregnant and so grateful I came across your videos. They’ve had a huge impact on my plans to parent. Thanks for making these concepts so accessible!
You mentioned your tot can leave the room whenever she wants. We intend to do a floor bed from infancy (initially sleeping in our room with a bassinet). I kind of assumed that I’d have a child proofing device on the doorknob to ensure baby stays in their safe environment. I live in a three storey townhome, so the stairs and amount of distance away I could be from baby’s room are part of my concern. Additionally, I don’t trust my cat not to smother baby in their sleep (out of love, hate, or some combination of the two!). Any thoughts on this?
Jo I know that Ashley puts a child gate on the outside of the door at night. So while Kylie can leave her bed and open the door, she cannot actually leave her room. Hope this helps, and congrats on the new little one! 😊
Hi Jo! Thanks so much! My toddler no longer has a gate at her door, as the other person mentioned... that was only when she was much younger. (The gate is now actually on our infant's door so that Kylie cannot get into it without us at night). Our bedroom floor has a permanent gate at the top of the stairs, so there's not much for her to do except wander into our room (which is what she always does if she leaves her own room). Nothing wrong with the lock on the door from the outside, though, if that's the only option you feel is safest (especially with your cat). :)
Hapa Family My mistake! I just recently discovered your channel so I’ve been binge watching all your old videos 😂 Learning about Montessori is so interesting and I would like to implement it when I become a mama someday and maybe in the classroom when I become a teacher! Thanks so much for sharing your beautiful family with us- I look forward to watching new videos! 😊
Hi Ashley! In Alex's room, there's only some plush toys and a few books, as you mentioned, I didn't want him to have too many toys to distract him from sleeping. We still use the white noise machine as well, it helps a lot during the day if there's any noise outside. I can imagine how you must've felt when you had to stop nursing Kylie. I am still nursing Alex at 21 months old and I get sad thinking that soon I am gonna have to stop nursing him. You are an amazing mom, Ashley! Mia and Kylie are so lucky to have you as their mom ❤️!
I cried MANY times after she was done, it was such a sad loss. 😞 My only good feeling about it was knowing it was entirely her choice. That certainly helped. Thank you so much for all of your support, you’re so sweet. 💕
Dear Ashley, thank you for sharing your practices, stories and ideas. I can't express enough how much you helped me figured out what to do and why. You have a fantastic family. Much love from UK!
would love to have a video about your bedtime routine.
Love your videos - very helpful and informative :))))
Now that Mia is older I was wondering if you could share whether she is falling asleep by herself and what kind of strategy did you use to help her achieve independent sleep. Appreciate your advice : ))
I will talk about it in an upcoming vlog. 😊
@@HapaFamily Could you link that vblog please? Also could you maybe do an updated version of this video but about Mia instead? And touch on a follow-up of Kyle's sleep?
I love your videos! I'm a first time mom and my son is 4 months old. I'm learning so much and I love that Mia is a month older than my son it helps give me ideas on what to do. How do you put Mia to sleep?
Thanks so much for watching, I’m glad to hear you’re enjoying the videos! My sleep approach with Mia is currently “under construction”, lol, but what I’m doing at the moment is nursing her until she’s very sleepy and then putting her down in her bed. On occasion, she fusses for a few minutes (which I allow as long as it’s not hard crying), but usually she’ll fall asleep within a reasonable amount of time on her own. 😊👍🏻
@@HapaFamily that's what I do with my baby. She is about to be 1 year old and this method actually works perfect for us.
I really love your videos I think they are very informative and helpful but I do not agree with this one ... nursing to sleep is normal and makes your baby feel same ... yes I do agree is hard work for us parents , currently my son is waking up every hour in the night and we do sleep and nurse to sleep but I would never be able to leave him crying when I can just nurse him to sleep ... training a child to sleep is not child led , because you are going against what the child is wanting , of course they will all outgrow that sleep association and some point and self wean which is proven to have lots of Benefits for the child ...
thank you for your videos tho as I said they are very helpful I just have to disagree with this one .
If y’all are looking for sleep help go to taking Cara babies
Just found your channel and I am in love! The amount of information is amazing for this ftm ☺️ thank you so much!
I found your channel recently- while researching different discipline ideas for my 1.5 year old! I absolutely love your channel! Loving the montessori parenting approach, and it has been working great with my son so far! Thanks for all your help! I also have a youtube channel, but I dont make any videos in regards to parenting styles- so I really appreciate that about your channel!
Ashley, thank you for the amazing videos, as always!
Curious to know your "practices" with white noise machines.
1. Do you systematically use it?
2. If not, what is the "trigger" to using it?
3. Some online resources mention that it should not be used more than 2 hours a day as it may disrupt REM sleep. What are your thoughts on this?
4. Some online resources mention that it should not be more than 50dB. What are your thoughts on this?
5. Any other tips?
Cheers from Tokyo, Japan!
I nurse to sleep so he can get as much breastmilk as possible, since I don't exclusively. Once he's stops and sleeps, I sneak away 😹😹😹
When Kylie would open the door to check if you were there, did you say anything to her? Did you interact with her in any way?
I would reassure her I was still there, whisper a gentle reminder that she should be in bed sleeping, and then quietly and quickly help her back into her bed. :)
Hi there! Thank you so much for this video. I am currently using a similar approach to put my baby (10 months old) to sleep in a Montessori bed. I sit in the middle of the room and sing a lullaby on repeat until she falls asleep. This happens pretty quickly. In about 5-10 mins. Then I leave the room. So that’s fine. The issue we have is that she wakes up multiple times per night and she is not able to fall back asleep on her own. And because the bed is on the floor, she crawls out of it and start wandering out of the room until we get there… what to do then?!?!
I am nursing to sleep since birth, too. But now she (15 months old) doesn't fall asleep that often and it took me aprox 1 hour to get her to sleep. Rocking, carrying, back to bed, waiting, crying, back in my arms and so on. I started with the bedtimestories as you mentioned in an other video, she still signaled me that she wants nursing. I have the feeling, that she uses me as a pacifier. I will try it again and again. I know my daughter needs time with it. For her nap, a book and carrying max. 5 minutes is all she needs there (did this for one month now).
Hopefully we will get it till the end of the year.
God luck with Mia's sleep 😉😘
Totally want to know how things went with Mia!
My son is 8months and he is a very active sleeper too. He find it hard to calm down by himself. I just have a question. When your baby would van to find you. Did you go and put her down again? Did you talk to her this whole bedtime to calm her down?
Thanks for this video! I'm in the same boat, cosleeping and feeding to sleep because it's what worked. But, it's time for a change. Going to try this!
Incredibly hepful and reassuring video! Thank you so much for sharing.
We have a 16 month old boy and he stil cant fall asleep independantly. What you did to help Kylie learn to fall asleep is very simiar to the chair method which I was considering to start doing very soon. I like the idea of a floor bed, but I think it would make the process much more difficult as I am sure my boy will keep getting up. How did you cope with that when you moved further away from her bed?
Greetings! I believe Maria Montessori intended to give a little independence to Italian children, even just to let them have some physical space around them, as we all know Italian mothers generally were not famous for teaching their children to be independent before the age of 30..and even then.. I do find the method fascinating and helpful! Independent sleep I believe is a different business, encouraging is great but I think a child can sleep alone when the child is ready and feels safe. To the pretty lady: thanks for the videos! :)
I've understood that it is possible to get used to individual sleeping on a bed on the floor from 3 months of age. What about before 3 months? Where should the baby sleep? In a separate baby cot? Together with parents or already in its own huge bed on the floor?
Thank you for your videos!! They are truly helpful. I’m thinking of switching my 14month old from a crib to a floor bed but am curious as to how to do it. He is sleep trained and can fall asleep on his own but I worry that if he has the ability to leave his bed that he may go play with the toys in his room rather then go to sleep. Would I need to just remove the toys from his room or is there something else I should be doing here? Thank you!
Thank you for sharing your experience. I have a quick question - how did you keep her contained when you were sitting next to her? My baby would crawl on me if I sit in the room. Also when you moved yourself out of the room with little door open, didn’t she try to come closer to the door to get out? Thanks
Was this specific for naps ? I have two boys 16 months apart. I still lay with my 2 yr old for all sleeping 😬 but need to change that ASAP! I also nurse my 1 yr old to sleep. And back to sleep in the night. Any tips for not doing that ?
WOW! You are amazing! This is my second video and it has won me over. I love the method you used--you were very detailed in explaining how you achieved independent sleep in a very humane way. I can't wait to try this with my 7-month old. I feel so confident now after watching this that we will have the same success. Seriously, i've read and researched so much on sleep training and your experience is the best one i've come across. You have just earned a subscriber!!🥰
Omg ! I have a 11 month baby and I nurse to sleep .. I am sooo tired ! Will try your method sounds good , I don’t like the cry out . Thank u
Ashley, thank for inspiration. Do you know what I shall do if my 10 month old baby rejects the bottle? He is ok not to nurse to sleep now, but he doesn’t take a bubies during the day either. I’m not sure what else to do. It seems like he tries the bottle and like nah I don’t want it and that’s it. No milk during the day. I don’t know what to do
Oh,thank you so much for this video...had no idea how i was going to sleep train my baby...i have a question though,when you were now sitting away from her and not holding her hand, what were you doing as she was crying?like were you looking at her smiling or were you giving your back at her?Maybe i missed the part...thank you for your response
Love the info needed a refresh to avoid errors in this trial time. My baby is 6 month old and he fall sleep by himself. Sometimes I miss him falling sleep in my arms but he dont like to cuddle to sleep. What really worked was weaning him off: make him fall sleep different positions on my arms then get him off my arms ... laying side by side. And finally off to the crib and holding his hand a few times until finally he is off on his own. I do the same for the pacifier. Sometimes I purposely dont give to him so when it's time he will be ready to drop as quick as within 2 weeks. This worked for my daughter. As of room ambience ... make everything very quiet (even if TV is on but VErY LOW, sometimes I need to turn off) lights off and comfortable temperature if possible and my beautiful lullaby ( same song same melody tells their brain time to turn off) . G L every one.
Hey, how long did Kylie take to fall asleep during the transition phases - when you would sleep in the middle of the room or next to the door?
Also, did u sleep train for the naps simultaneously? Or tackle night sleep first and then extend to naps?
Right now, my 11mo falls asleep on her own at night when I lay on the floor next to her floor bed, but is rocked to sleep by nanny for two naps in daytime.
I would love details on how you took the slats out of the ikea bed. Also what mattress do you use?
As a new momma, I'm lucky that I have a fairly good sleeper, but I have to say I love watching your videos and have learned so much from you. I'm VERY new to this whole Montessori idea but I can already see my ideas of raising my son are diverging a LOT from non-montessori minded parents which is interesting. so, I guess I just want to say thank you again! You're a wonderful momma!
Thanks for this video. What would you do if she kept getting up? Just lay her back down?
Thank you so much!! How long would you hang out outside of the door??
I have a 27 month old who sucks his thumb to fall asleep. What recommendations would you give to help him ween off this habit?
i don't understand how she still stayed in bed crying next to yoh. my LO would get out and climb in my lap🙈
Hello, I've found you yesterday and I am watching a lot of your videos! I find them very helpful.
I have a question regarding floor beds, if the baby has free access to the floor, isn't there a risk of asphyxial death?
I mean, when transitioning from the bed into the floor, if its carpeted or soft, wouldn't it be potentially dangerous for them?
I like how you love and teach ur kids 😍😍 sending hug from Indonesia 😍
I hope I can be the best mother for my lil one
What do you do if she wakes up multiple times in the middle of the night because she can't see you next to her?
Do you use sleeping bags? And were you worried about them getting out of bed and somehow hurting themselves while in their sleeping bag?
You are SO patient and I hope that I can be this patient when I have a child! I watch all your videos and I look forward to using so much of what you talk about. Also I really appreciate you sharing that this was difficult for you as well!
How did you get your kiddos to stay on their floor bed while you were letting them cry? Mine keeps crawling away and crying
Thank you for this video. Such useful information 😊😊😊
Hi. Did she not get out of bed all the time? If she did how did you stop her, how did you keep her in bed. What about waking up at night?
This is such a great approach ! Thank you, keep the videos on this topic coming.
I would recommend "The Continuum Concept" by Jean Liedloff for parents with children that have difficulties falling asleep. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Continuum_concept
This is very interesting. I had never heard of it. Thank you for mentioning it! A lot of it resonates with my parenting style/philosophy. ☮️💟
I find myself breast feeding my little one to sleep on and off. I so didn't want her to get a comfort to sleep like this ugh.
As she was crying each time though did you pick her up or just let her cry.
Wondering if you swaddles and, if you did, how you transitioned out!
Right now I'm doing what you did! Great advise without leaving her!
I just found your Channel and loved the Videos, it really feels Right in my heart and is quite similar to what i do home with my daughter. I am wondering if you know the book The Continuum Concept- Jean Liedloff, this was my bible somehow. It says that a human child has the Need to be carried all the time. So i did. My daughter slept through the night from birth, but i never laid her somewhere. The first 4 months we carried her all the time, than she started to crawl and the Need of being carried was less every day. Now she is almost 3 and crazy independend and so calm, happy. I am so in bliss that i found your channel, cause i always try to reflect myself more and more to find our what to do better. You did remind me on how important it is to stay always calm! Thank you so much for sharing. I hope you liked my Story
Hey hey, I'm a mama to be in September, may I know what you meant when you said carried her all the time? So you baby wear? And you never laid her somewhere..but how do you do in the night? Thank you :)