Hey BEAT fam! I'm BEHIND on responding to comments so PLEASE forgive me! Today we are dealing with a very practical and real issue. You're in a relationship but you start feeling someone else. What do you do? What has your experience been? What advice would you give? Leave some comments below! AND The BEAT is going live soon so stay tuned!
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P Vincente stop with the men bashing. Temptation affects women equally to men. Men can’t have affairs by themselves. We live in a lust society and men and women are struggling with this. Nobody is free of sin and we all look. This video is helpful to those who want to do lords will but struggle apparently you have been hurt and have bitterness in your heart and no better than the people that did you harm. Gods word can restore I seen it. If you are without sin then why are you on this earth? You talk abkjt Allen parr in a disdainful way keep your negative views elsewhere. You say people that have this problem need help it sounds like you need help based on your comments about this video you are calling a man who’s trying to help slimy and curse and all he is doing is encouraging people.
I also going through that situation , im attract to that person, bcoz of his spiritual life and he speak gently and have respect to each other. that time i find out that he also attract in me, 😩 ahh im very guilty to my husband every night i always pray and pray that God will take a away this feeling. praise GOD😇 answered prayer, my feeling for him is slowly disappear nothing is imposible to GOD😇♥
another great message brother. the struggle and temptation is real and too many times people play around with this. there are plenty of good looking girls at my work and I used to try to purposely avoid them cause I felt like I should never even acknowledge their presence. but I learned that there's no way we can possibly avoid the other half of the world for the rest of our lives and that God made us men visual creatures so its not sinful to acknowledge womens beauty. to deny that there's no other good looking females except for your wife would be lying right there. BUT WE MUST NOT LET OUR EYES WONDER IN AREAS WHERE THEY HAVE NO BUSINESS GOING. cause then we are led to list and fall. so when I am around these girls I don't just rudely ignore them but I am careful with how I speak and don't go to lunch or anything like that cause that would be stupid to do and just asking for trouble. also a little tip here to make them aware I mention my wife when I can in conversations so they know I'm married and off limits. you can be friendly without being flirty and with discipline you can control your eyes from roaming around where they shouldn't.
no need to play with fire. yes finding someone else attractive is normal. but there is a difference between being attractive and desiring someone. I can find a girl very attractive while being with someone but me desiring her changes everything. it will lead to temptation. so if thats the case its best to run like you said and always set boundaries. if you dont respect your own boundaries no one would ever respect you.
I witnessed this last year. At the time I was single, but a girl who was in a relationship would constantly flirt with me, even in the presence of her s/o at times. That showed me just how disrespectful she was to her man and it broke my heart. I could never bear to stand for that behavior out of a Woman.
Physical attraction isn’t the problem for me...it’s the personality. That’s the temptation and thankfully I have always been able to see that the grass isn’t greener majority of the time
@@xxunprecidablexx6709 I’ll tell you this. If you’re looking for a wife. Do this ask both of them to Write down What they value in a relationship also. Take both of them out to dinner at different times Act like you left your wallet and see which one generous enough to pay The. Also do this. Ask them both are their fathers in their lives if they have something bad to say about him. You probably don’t wanna date those girls
@@xxunprecidablexx6709Go out with both of them. Don't be exclusive until you figure out which one is right.dont have a scarcity mindset and only focus on one person.have multiple dates with different women.thats my 2 cents.
I feel like this is something thats such a deep down problem that goes on internally and no one really knows how to handle it properly . I think now's the time people should know how to combat it 👏
Thanks again brother Allen. Got saved in 2019, married the father of my child. 2.5 years later, I am currently faced with being strongly attracted to a co-worker AND fellow brother in the Lord! I NEVER thought this could happen. Its the most embarrassing and shameful feeling. We are all wicked in the flesh. Now I know how serious to take this and to extinguish this (or at least prevent) this from becoming anything more harmful than what it already is. I confess to liking the inappropriate attention he gives me, (many compliments and strong eye contact) and believe there is mutual chemistry. I don't want to quit my job... and I told my husband everything. We have a strong marriage and are always honest with each other. If anyone reads this please send a prayer. thank you. Replies rooted in love are welcome.
@@laurenfrost6147 It all turned out just fine. I ended up confessing this to my pastor and his wife together at the same time, not because I thought I had to but I did it for accountability and also thought someone should know I felt flirted with because this man is now a head pastor at another local church. God worked everything out for the good. I confronted the man and told him to stop complimenting me and admitted I believed him to be a stumbling block for myself. His response showed me that he was already possibily aware and he did not apologize but, instead, backed off. That day I confronted him, as he was leaving the work place... shot my a knowing glace on his way out the door. The look said it all. I was definitely right to be cautious. We both ended up quitting for different reasons and God has led us in two separate directions. Now I am pregnant with my 3rd child! This is the biggest blessing and this man is no longer in my life.
It's no coincidence that attractive woman will come my way during Rocky moment's in my marriage. And honestly I was tempted to be unfaithful. But then I had to remind myself that a one time fling isn't worth losing everything I've gained in my marriage
Serious question. And im only asking because I struggle with the idea of marriage even as a Christian man. Do you ever wish you were never married in the first place? If not, You’d be free to flirt with attractive women as you please. Right?
oh boy this video was so timely😁....I'm currently engaged to a Christian guy......he's kind, God fearing, honest & no drama praise the Lord - I'm attracted to him on a intellectual & spiritual level mostly.......so from time to time I notice I'm now attracted to people I wasn't even attracted to before. He lives in another country so we don't spend much time together. But I'm always praying & staying obedient to God's word....... hopefully when we marry & spend more time I will have a better connection with him
Well now I understand better why I've been cheated on in previous relationships........I'm always the one being loyal and focused on the relationship but these worldly dudes ain't loyal😂. So I'm now stepping out in faith......I ditched the last one & got saved instead......became obedient to God & put him 1st in my life.....and now I'm engaged to a god fearing christian man so that's a testimony indeed😁......I'm still focused on God 1st & I never want to put anything before him ever again.......read my Bible everyday.....pray & stay obedient to his word.......sharing the good news every opportunity I get......I've never been this happy & fulfilled🙌
Hey Jarx, thanks for sharing with us. You definitely need attraction but it's not the most important thing. But if you have lost all attraction for someone then I wouldn't move forward with marriage because that can be a red flag and a very serious problem.
THE BEAT by Allen Parr I haven't lost attraction - I'm just saying that how I'm attracted to the person is different than my previous relationships........in other words the attraction is not a highly physical one but more intellectual & spiritual.
Great message. I dont who are the 30 people who disliked this video. This video is dead on. Everyone thinks the grass is greener on the other side.....only to find weeds!.
In such a situation, my advice is to avoid the person as much as is possible (like you mentioned) and whenever you do have to speak to him or her, stay on topic. In other words, say what you need to say and then leave. No need to be jovial and open. Of course, be polite but you don't have ask those common questions like, "Did anything interesting over the weekend?" It may sound harsh but not taking these steps is really opening the door to building a relationship with this person. That being said, great job Allen and God bless.
Yesterday I met a lady who happens to be a director of an organization, we got to talk about places in Mexico since she has Mexican roots, she took down her mask and I got to see her face. She was naturally beautiful and I even told her she is 😄 and she was flattered. But I’m already in a relationship… I can’t do anything else.
If it's simply finding someone attractive, but you don't have any desire at all to forsake your partner to be with them, that's one thing. But when you feel a strong desire to be with the other person and that doesn't go away, it's a sign that your current relationship is in danger. And from there, your options are determined by your current level of commitment. If you're in a marriage, then you have no choice. No contact. Don't even fantasize about the idea. Your commitment is to the person you married, and them alone. If you're not married to the person you're currently with, then you need to take some time to seriously reflect upon your desire for another person. Because at the end of the day, Christian dating is supposed to help you figure out whether or not you can get married to another person or not. That involves forsaking all other lovers, and loving each other to the point where you will die and even serve one another. So if you fully realized that you can't have that kind of relationship with your current partner, and you know that you'd at least be better off alone than with them, then break up with them as soon as possible. Don't try to have your cake and eat it too by still being in a relationship that you feel like is doomed to end soon while trying to set up your next relationship with the new person. That's not fair on your partner, and certainly doesn't create a foundation of trust and mutual respect for the other person if you do end up with them. And if you genuinely realize that you love your current partner that way, and they do to you, then don't forsake that. Finding that kind of relationship is incredibly rare, and attraction alone can never be a threat to that kind of relationship. And no, you wouldn't be an evil or bad person if you stuck with a partner you don't want to be with. You'd only be evil if you continue to lie to yourself and your partner that you love them when you truly don't, and stick with them when you could have both moved on and found better partners.
Awesome video. I would suggest that anyone in this situation should get godly perspective in prayer. Also, it takes communication and opening up to the spouse.
@@kierrarichardson80 It’s important to find a way to talk it out. It’s not easy but you can’t go on wasting your time with someone who doesn’t have all of your affection.
@@carlel121 I can understand your point but if you have a desire for someone else, the person you are with will not get all of you. It’s not an easy thing but it has to start with being open and honest.
Am just happy you gave practical advice instead of saying just pray the feelings away. Thats the only I have hearing for years as a christian to just pray everything away
Wow! I like the honesty in handling this topic Allen....""out there will always be people that seemingly are more beautiful,intelligent, smarter.....than your spouse....
You explain things so well! I'm a new subscriber and really have been enjoying the topics! Stuff most people don't want to talk about or don't know how! Keep it up! I've been sending a lot of the videos to people I think need them and to ministration staff!
Hey Niecybaby1960! That is awesome. So glad that you have subscribed! You will truly enjoy this channel, the free resources and the community of people we have who engage quite a bit on the videos. God bless you and thanks for subbing!
I just started going out with this girl and I realized I’m more into this guy who I’m positive is into me but I don’t want to break off the relationship with the girl because I don’t want to hurt her and things
Thanks for the comments.. currently struggling with the attraction to the other person who honestly makes me feel like going ahead. We talk and agree to stop but the attraction lingers..
Needed to hear this. I've been with a guy for almost 3 years but I have always had strong attraction for a guy that didn't want a relationship now he gives me attention but I must ignore it because I will ruin something stable and good. But the temptation is like fire I want it but gotta stay away.
@@lzyt6709 I suggest you look for their shortcomings. You find someone's attractive because of their strengths, but you can also uncrush them because of their shortcomings. At lease this works for me.
Flirting is what I do. And I can’t imagine living in a world where I cannot do so because I’m married. I’d rather never get married and never find out if I have what it takes to commit. I’d rather not set myself up to fail by getting married.
So i’m in a healthy relationship, and as a child i used to always like this guy. This guy is my best friend, and he told me he didn’t like me back, i accepted and forced myself to move on. After a couple months of my relationship i started to notice multiple signs but i ignored it. And now it’s really getting on to me, i don’t want to let this person go because i’m still trying to get him over his ex. And with my boyfriend, he really means the world. But i want to stop and try to get out of being in love with my best friend- please help me- what the hell do i do?
What I like about this dood is that even though he is religious he doesn’t wave off reality. A lots of People say oh nothing can happen to me cuz got protects me. I can’t get coronavirus cuz god is with me they loose the consept of reality. This dood is realistic and not unoing like all this people that talk about god a lot.
nice message in a nutshell. it could be spoken for a while without an end..remember our commitment a known devil is better than an unknown angel,resist and the devil will flee this verse realy works.
Thank you so much for making this video. I really needed the advice you gave. I don’t have any family or friends that I trust enough to ask for this kind of guidance! Thank you thank you thank you and God bless.
i had this friend. once my ex left me, he was there for me and helped me through it all. we started dating a month after. we’ve been dating for 4 months now but now we rarely hang out. he never talks to me, and if we do hang out, he never says ‘i love you’. but now i have this other friend. we’ve been friends for 6 months. however, he makes me feel ways i can’t explain. every time i’m around him i always get nervous and start smiling like crazy. he makes me feel so confident about my self. but here’s the difficult part. now, my bf has been spending time with new recently. and still makes me feel loved. but my friend is just-.. amazing. i don’t know whether i should stay with my bf, be with my friend, ignore my friend so that i can focus on my bf, or just hide it all. help?
Hey,I know I previously commented before on tattoos I read your article on it which was very interesting and well presented,Now I'm also comfused on rather God is against cosmetics such as surgery and makeup,It would mean so much to me if you discuss this topic.Thank you for your previous response 😄and if you already have please post a link 😆
Yes, I've gotten the question regarding make-up before. Here is my stance. If make-up is used to enhance one's beauty then I see no problem with it. If it is used because someone does not feel good about themselves behind the make-up, then that is another deeper issue that needs to be addressed. It illustrates that something is missing and that you only feel good about yourself behind a mask. Those are my thoughts.
I was married once to my beloved hubby after that i find no other man more attractive then him, but because im a bigger size n hes a smaller size, im not really that attractive to him long story of heartaches n sadness but eventually were not together for 5 years now i end up being a widow now for 5 years lol
Pastor, This happen to me a month or so ago. The eye contact along with a great smile was giving me the business. I made it through, but she came back a few days later and introduced me to a family member, so shortly after that meet and greet..... I walked to my car and left my job for about twenty minutes... When I returned she was gone... #Whew
Once the person notices their attraction, it is wise to open a dialog with their significant other. Be careful not to hurt them with words. Your truth can still be sin, if it hurts others. Use tact to raise the issue. Do not say “you”, but use “I” statements. If sweeter words can not be found, ask the congregation’s leader to mediate. It is unnatural for men and women to communicate. So, supernatural assistance may be needed. Most importantly, do not give up. It is never greener on the other side. This is more for married people, but use as necessary. There also comes self-evaluation, and humbling ones self. It does not feel natural, but when the relationship matures with our lord in the middle, it is better then the puppy love stage(lust stage). Last thing I will put in, is keeping your guard up. Not allowing the ways man, to keep you from the joy God has attended for you.
I agree with some of these points but I don’t believe if it was there at one point you can get it back. Sometimes too much has been done or said and you can’t get it back. This you must walk away. Also, in my case, I met someone else while married on a fluke..wasn’t looking but I was extremely unhappy. Stuck financially and wanted out because of abuse. In this case, cheating to me is not wrong. He didn’t deserve my faithfulness.
im watching this cos im on the other side of this topic. i cant do this anymore. i just wanna breakup with this guy, but he begs me and forces me to stay in our relationship even tho he is into someone else. i just feel like im being torn apart everyday of my fucking life.
I am in same situation, tho married, seperated for over 10 years, and it fucking sucks, tried everything, me counciling the works but she refused to proud, to relegious, to stuck up, judgmental, sexless, fussy, judgemental and I'm expected to put up with that, live in negitivity visiting her always seeking some affection and never getting it, only get the silent treament and spend money on her. Have no kids to her, but I do have a daughter to my ex that I never married because it was stopped by her parents and some age difference too. It had all the passion, but gave it all up for relegious reasons, was not born again, new nothing about grace, always repenting for sins when the bible says we cannot repent of sins, but we repent by changing our mind.....We should be evenly yoked in marrige even in christ... This business the bible says we cannot devoice if the negitive partner or spouse not want a devoice, how ridiculous is that, how soul damaging, robs self -esteem and self worth, sucidial feelings, going to hell anyway, so might as well devoice myself. In your situation sister, your not married right? so no problem leave the guy easy for you, hard for me.....So you still love this guy even tho he into someone else? what a beautifal woman you are, you deserve better. Doest he tell you he loves you, adores you??? Is the sex great that keeps you together? Outside of marrige a good sex relationship is fine with me if that was my choice but marrige it has to be true love, romance, and evenly yoked in christ. merry xmas sister. you can contact my facebook darryl kirky, here in australia as if I dont get back with my ex mother of my daughter for any reasons that is stopped again, I am going to need a real woman friend. Im done with the insanity of biblical judgments that can lead a person to suicide. I want out of my marrige and be with a woman who inspires greatness in me to serve the lord evenly yoked. The mother of my daughter was once relegious like I used to be and now in no mans land, but if she accepted the grace of jesus christ we I would take her back and marry her.. Until then I am still done with my marrige and I will end up with the right woman and it surely arnt or not my fucking sexless ex. I should stop giving her money too as I have no kids to her... You free to leave your guy, but if the sex is great, that would be hard, but if its true love in christ which it is not, then get married... Lust without love is a cursed sin and that is what jesus meant not to lust as otherwise a man would have to go around with his fucking eyes closed all the time to avoid lust........Contact me if you need a friend. god bless you..... cheers. darryl kirky perth western australia.
I’m so conflicted... I went to Homecoming with my friend Jack, we both know we like each other, we both assumed we were going to date any day now... but then I met this guy Lucas... and he’s amazing. I told Lucas about Jack and now I think he won’t be interested in me (he really seemed to be before) I wanna be with both of them so incredibly bad. What do I do?? Whatever happens will hurt the other
people pray for me idk why but every single day for about 2 weeks know i been getting some toughts in my head that god is mad at me because ived sinned i cant get it out of my head i just keep getting toughts that hes going to punish me and i cant stand those toughts i want to prove to god that i believe in him and that i have. faith ive stooped doing sins like smoking or drinking those were easy but i cant get rid of these toughts
Maria Arana i'm no pastor or bible scholar, but that could just be the devil trying to make you feel unworthy of receiving Christ in your life again, using your sins of which you have already repented & turned away from to discourage you from having a relationship with God. Just keep seeking God and ask for clarity on your relationship with Him, and ask Him to get rid of those thoughts for you if they didn't come from Him. I struggle with that too sometimes so I just pray to Him directly and ask Him to show me what Ive done wrong and ask whether He has truly forgiven me. And it always help to continue turning from your sins to show God that you are serious about it. Just seek Him and He will help you, im sure 😊
You should check out The Bondage Breaker by Neil Anderson. This sounds like the enemy is trying to attach you with thoughts of condemnation. James 4:7-8 and Ephesians 6:10-18.
What gets me about this kind of situation is a lot of Christian guys will go to great lengths to AVOID & not talk to a woman they find attractive, even if they work with her or go to the same church. The comments below prove this. But this is unbelievably immature & shallow when most of the time they don’t know anything about her or whether they’d be compatible with her anyway. It makes the woman feel like she must be seen as Jezebel or something! It’s not on to rudely ignore someone when you should be a source of godly & brotherly encouragement to them either in church or in the workplace. Gosh, this isn’t primary school. Some of these men need to seriously grow up. She most likely wouldn’t be interested anyway . Allow yourself to admire her beauty in a godly way, but gosh, treat her like a respectable human being !
Theyre taken. They shouldn't entertain the company of another woman. The flesh is weak but the spirit is willing...they kniw this and are doing their best to honor their significant other. Many women or people in general have no problem stealing a man or woman.. That's reality.
I prayed so hard last night for God to take away the intense attraction I have for my neighbor. He lives right downstairs and I often hear him ( sexually). At first I thought it was gross but one day our eyes met and I felt like I had been hit by lightning and I dont know if he feels the same. I see him only every now and then but when I do, he stops whatever he's doing and stares at me. I stared back the last time. I have a husband and I believe he has a girlfriend and I don't want to be that kind of person who doesnt care. It doesn't help that he is the best looking man I have ever seen in my life. Help me Lord. This is tough. And I don't think he is a guy who cares about right or wrong or relationships. I dont think he would be good for me even if we were both single. He has had alot of women in his apt. I have so rarely ever in my life felt for anyone, what I felt for him that day our eyes met that day that I felt like it should be pursued, like it was natural but it is wrong, at least this is what I keep trying to tell myself.
Hey Friend! I enjoy your videos very much, and I always take the time to hear them. My husband and I are both mildly on the Spectrum and neither of us can really relate to this. I’m not sure, but I think that my husband and I might be what is known as Demisexual, which means one is only attracted to someone with whom they share an emotional attachment. I looked it up and now I feel that it would explain a lot. He never had a relationship before me and had never even felt the desire to kiss anyone. I had been married but had never been attracted to any other man, besides my childhood crush, whom I still never had sexual feelings for. I don’t have lesbian tendencies, so I knew it wasn’t that. I was so upset when my teenage friends talked about what they wanted to do sexually with men that they just thought were attractive.. Gross! My husband’s family describes him as being exactly the same way growing up. It took a long time for him to kiss me.. A long time. Our courtship was also a bit long. However, we were always very affectionate and by the the time we were ready to get married, we couldn’t resist one another. We just can’t get enough of each other. His father once asked when we were courting if he was homosexual because he never showed interest in females... I asked if he showed interest in males, and he said.. Well, actually no. He shows curiosity about human behavior and psychology in general and is known as the innocent guy in high school. The weird guy. I was the same. Just never had that interest, but I am soooooooooooooo attracted to him. The attraction between us feels cosmic. It’s nuts, because we were both basically “aesexual” most of our lives, and now he and I are “naturals” with one another and just can’t stay away from one another. It’s powerful - like a light sprung on. I always wonder why the Bible never mentions people like us.. Any insight?
Great perspective. I’m on the spectrum (‘high-functioning’) too and you’re right there’s not much understanding of people like us and the way we behave and see things. I could only focus on one person too. Wish to find a connection like yours one day!
I recently had this temptation. I realize it’s just a matter of feeling like your in a chase again. It’s the novelty and newness of the feeling of what could happen. It happens quick but you have to act fast. I cut the relationship off and explained to the individual that we probably should probably keep our distance in person and virtually. It wasn’t easy because of the temptation and also the reality that nothing had really happened. However I felt it was wise to stop well before anything occurred.
But what if the person you like isn't out of lust or anything? Does that still make it consider as sin? What if you found the real one given that you are not married yet?
I went on a date with this wonderful Christian boy, but he said we wouldn't work since he was going back to his home country for a year. So a couple month later i started dating this boy, he is wonderful, kind, funny and loving but hes not a Christian at all, but now the first guy has returned and he keeps comeing into my work and i don't know what to do cause I still like him. Please help
Is it okay to be friends with that person, without any flirting if I don't have any romantic intentions but crave for a brotherly affection with that person?
I never tried finding a sweetheart. I have been too busy playing video games. I do have youtube videos about my memories, the bible, and some strategy games that I play like Total Annihilation and Total Annihilation Kingdoms.
God hasn't necessarily made your significant other. There's a difference between people we chose by our own beliefs and between partners who are truly from God. God gave us free will but never push the whole responsibility on God when we've made our own choices.
But anyway thanks for your video it helped. Yeah truth is I have a little crush on someone but I have a boyfriend. But I'm not being flirty with this guy who likes me I'm being the friend zone to him. I'm controlling myself trying to keep it cool. Because I love my relationship I'm with now. I don't just want to break up off my current relationship. Cuz if I did I'd be crying and broken for hurting his feelings. This guy I have a little crush on ask me if I wanted his number. I didn't take it I didn't text him when he gave it to me. I didn't say I love you either. I'm being on the friend zone.
Am currently in a relationship, but (not married, Recently I meet a former college mate, am beginning to get the feelings of falling in love all over again, my current gf is a nice woman but not without her weakness. this other lady is really nice as well and what attracts me most about her isn't her beauty as they are both beautiful it's her maturity and take on life, we are also alike in alot of stuff and easier to get along with.. I love my girlfriend but am just not sure anymore I don't want to hurt her feelings and at the same time I want to make the best decision concerning who am going to spend the rest of my life with. Please help
My situation is the same I'm attracted yo a woman who works infront of my work I cannot avoid her we're always seeing each other and i have serious girlfriend in the same time . Wtf should i do ! It's nightmare maybe i'll pray my neighbor getting boyfriend soon and releases me from that temptation
hey brother, your videos really help me. I was seeing this video many times 2 weeks ago ans I didnt watch this though I had a feeling to do it. Earlier when I was at my work, i saw this girl our new sales staff and I am attracted to her. This is very wrong. i must overcome. thank you for this vid bro. thank you for encouragement . God bless you.
Hey Bryan, you are so welcome. Yes, it's a part of life and a struggle for us all. Many people just don't admit it. Thank you for being honest with us and with yourself. God bless,
What if ur partner isn't really doing anything in the relationship and don't really make me happy and the person I like my bestfriend treats me better but he far away
It's called a "SPELL" and "TEMPORARY". Cause it was never real. That's why when cheaters finally get into a serious relationship with each other, majority of the time, it never last. Relationship is like a vacation- it's only fun in the beginning when it's new and short term. Stay too long, reality will hit- got the bills to pay, weeds growing in your yard to pull and trim. House breaking apart. Same old problems always arise. That's why some people change partner often- cause they crave and want to find that emotional high again and again like a drug. Consequently, these kind of people end up being alone and lonely because they never set up root and invested in a real home when later they need it. Sure. While your permanent home may not be as grand as some. And you will always have to work hard putting in the effort to maintain it. At least whenever you come home, you will always have a place that you belong and those that love you no matter what like your family.
I am not bragging that i can steal boyfriends but i think i do attract them. maybe as long as they are not married they can still seperate. im not saying it is good to steal boyfriends tho
I was in a 3 year relationship with my boyfriend and everything was good. But deep down I had the curiosity to talk to other guys and see if they liked me. I don’t really know why I wanted to to do that because I really really loved my boyfriend, he was always treating well etc...he was the dream guy of many girls. Anyway, one day a guy texted me “hello” and I took that as a chance to put my curiosity in a test so I answered him. I didn’t want anything serious to happen, just a little talk..but We started talking and some days after the flirting was extremely obvious in our messages from both sides. One day we accidentally met and really felt something. I didn’t know what to do, I loved my boyfriend so much but my attention was on this new guy. For the next 2 or 3 weeks I was very confused about what I should do. I took the decision to break up with my boyfriend and start something new with the other guy. Then, when I was with my new boyfriend I was very happy but as soon as I returned home I started crying because I had regretted my decision. This situation kept going for about 3 months. It was a very stressing and confusing time for me and again I didn’t know what to do. One day I sat down and thought of all the memories I had with my ex and realized I only wanted to be with him. So, the next day I told my boyfriend I wanted to break up. The thing is that he was so addicted to me and really loved me in addition to me where I was just seeking for attention and maybe the feeling of other men seeing me in an erotic way. I completely messed it up. So, I told him I wanted to break up and the next day I returned to my ex and we were okay again. But the other guy saw me with him after 3 days of our break up and he literally went bananas. He stated texting me and threatening me that he would tell my boyfriend that I cheated on him etc After some time things finally went well...but guess what.. Now almost after 9 months of this situation my boyfriend has changed and I find myself a lot of times missing the other guy...
That's really rough how are you doing now? Are you still with anyone? Are you still with the ex that you broke up with? I'm in a little situation myself. this guy has a crush on me and I have a little crush on him too but I have a boyfriend. I love him. And I'm happy with him. I have a little crush on this other guy I feel kind of nervous around him when I see this guy in public. But the crush is not serious it's small not that big and serious. I'm not flirting with him. I'm not saying I love you. I'm just being a friend zone person to him. I'm doing the best I can to the control myself. Cuz I love my relationship I'm in with now.
This doesn’t appear to be biblical at all. In that sense, this is the opinion of Mr. Parr-I have a lot of respect for Mr. Parr. I think the word attraction is being misused here. We are all humans and can find the opposite sex attractive. But that’s no different from noticing a nice looking car. We also can notice if a man or woman is well spoken, funny, etc. However, one can’t be really attracted to someone else without some kind of effort. I am guessing Mr. is taking about noticing qualities rather than having some sort of relationship with that person. I also think we’re not giving God enough credit when it comes to being happy with what we have. The people in relationships who find others so attractive to the point where they would need to avoid them are people who have been looking for such things.
can you do a video about Transgenderism....my Christian friends and I had a discussion about it....they think it is judgemental to not accept it..... also can you do a video in judging...I'm so tired of other lukewarm Christians saying it's judging to stand on God's word....
So are we talking about married people only? If someone has a girlfriend or a boyfriend , should they be off limits? If you know there is a mutual attraction but there is also respect for that , but the attraction continues...What to do? We’ve all had a bf or gf it didn’t work out with, so this is an odd situation. Stay away from the other person completely?
I have a boyfriend now but I have a crush on someone else and that person is worried that I have feelings for him how do I keep it just friends with him?
Sorry late comment don't know how you doing now if you're with your boyfriend or you're with the other person now? But I am in the same since situation kind of too. I have a little crush on someone but it's not that serious. But I have a boyfriend I love him to death. I'm not just going to break off my current relationship. Cuz I don't want to ruin my relationship that I'm happy with. My current boyfriend already met my parents. So It just wouldn't make sense and my parents will be so confused saying what's going on. I don't want them to think something's wrong with my current relationship. So I think it's a better choice to be friends with this guy that has a crush on me as well or I just stay away from him. This new guy blockes me for no reason as well when he thinks I'm at him. It's like he's mad that I won't go with him. I am just being friendly with him friend zone.
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Hey BEAT fam! I'm BEHIND on responding to comments so PLEASE forgive me! Today we are dealing with a very practical and real issue. You're in a relationship but you start feeling someone else. What do you do? What has your experience been? What advice would you give? Leave some comments below! AND The BEAT is going live soon so stay tuned!
THE BEAT by Allen Parr awesome
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P Vincente stop with the men bashing. Temptation affects women equally to men. Men can’t have affairs by themselves. We live in a lust society and men and women are struggling with this. Nobody is free of sin and we all look. This video is helpful to those who want to do lords will but struggle apparently you have been hurt and have bitterness in your heart and no better than the people that did you harm. Gods word can restore I seen it. If you are without sin then why are you on this earth? You talk abkjt Allen parr in a disdainful way keep your negative views elsewhere. You say people that have this problem need help it sounds like you need help based on your comments about this video you are calling a man who’s trying to help slimy and curse and all he is doing is encouraging people.
I also going through that situation , im attract to that person, bcoz of his spiritual life and he speak gently and have respect to each other. that time i find out that he also attract in me, 😩 ahh im very guilty to my husband every night i always pray and pray that God will take a away this feeling. praise GOD😇 answered prayer, my feeling for him is slowly disappear nothing is imposible to GOD😇♥
I am also currently in the same exact situation. The feelings just don't want to leave me.😢
another great message brother. the struggle and temptation is real and too many times people play around with this. there are plenty of good looking girls at my work and I used to try to purposely avoid them cause I felt like I should never even acknowledge their presence. but I learned that there's no way we can possibly avoid the other half of the world for the rest of our lives and that God made us men visual creatures so its not sinful to acknowledge womens beauty. to deny that there's no other good looking females except for your wife would be lying right there. BUT WE MUST NOT LET OUR EYES WONDER IN AREAS WHERE THEY HAVE NO BUSINESS GOING. cause then we are led to list and fall. so when I am around these girls I don't just rudely ignore them but I am careful with how I speak and don't go to lunch or anything like that cause that would be stupid to do and just asking for trouble. also a little tip here to make them aware I mention my wife when I can in conversations so they know I'm married and off limits. you can be friendly without being flirty and with discipline you can control your eyes from roaming around where they shouldn't.
John Lauland Wow! Thanks for being honest 😊
Very wise advice John! I do the same thing man! Mention my wife all the time!
John Lauland THANK YOU SIR, IM JUST BARELY GETTING BACK TO THE BASICS AFTER GOING THROUGH
John Lauland amen brother. Thank you for sharing and God bless. You are a true inspiration.
Amen brother
no need to play with fire. yes finding someone else attractive is normal. but there is a difference between being attractive and desiring someone. I can find a girl very attractive while being with someone but me desiring her changes everything. it will lead to temptation. so if thats the case its best to run like you said and always set boundaries. if you dont respect your own boundaries no one would ever respect you.
Well said Eddie.
Don't flirt And Run
That's the best advice thank you 💙
I witnessed this last year. At the time I was single, but a girl who was in a relationship would constantly flirt with me, even in the presence of her s/o at times. That showed me just how disrespectful she was to her man and it broke my heart. I could never bear to stand for that behavior out of a Woman.
Interacting with a woman like that will show you two things
Who you really are. And how devious woman can be
I was going to skip this one, but I'm glad I didn't. Great advice. I passed it on to all my children.
Thanks so much Tux1. We can never be too careful. God bless you,
Physical attraction isn’t the problem for me...it’s the personality. That’s the temptation and thankfully I have always been able to see that the grass isn’t greener majority of the time
Yo I need help, im talking to this one girl but I also like the other girl and she likes me too
@@xxunprecidablexx6709 I’ll tell you this. If you’re looking for a wife. Do this ask both of them to Write down What they value in a relationship also. Take both of them out to dinner at different times Act like you left your wallet and see which one generous enough to pay The. Also do this. Ask them both are their fathers in their lives if they have something bad to say about him. You probably don’t wanna date those girls
@@xxunprecidablexx6709Go out with both of them. Don't be exclusive until you figure out which one is right.dont have a scarcity mindset and only focus on one person.have multiple dates with different women.thats my 2 cents.
I feel like this is something thats such a deep down problem that goes on internally and no one really knows how to handle it properly . I think now's the time people should know how to combat it 👏
Thanks again brother Allen. Got saved in 2019, married the father of my child. 2.5 years later, I am currently faced with being strongly attracted to a co-worker AND fellow brother in the Lord! I NEVER thought this could happen. Its the most embarrassing and shameful feeling. We are all wicked in the flesh. Now I know how serious to take this and to extinguish this (or at least prevent) this from becoming anything more harmful than what it already is. I confess to liking the inappropriate attention he gives me, (many compliments and strong eye contact) and believe there is mutual chemistry. I don't want to quit my job... and I told my husband everything. We have a strong marriage and are always honest with each other. If anyone reads this please send a prayer. thank you. Replies rooted in love are welcome.
the same exact situation, the only difference is the work part and the fact that I'm not married
Praying! 6 months out, how’s it going?
@@laurenfrost6147 It all turned out just fine. I ended up confessing this to my pastor and his wife together at the same time, not because I thought I had to but I did it for accountability and also thought someone should know I felt flirted with because this man is now a head pastor at another local church. God worked everything out for the good. I confronted the man and told him to stop complimenting me and admitted I believed him to be a stumbling block for myself. His response showed me that he was already possibily aware and he did not apologize but, instead, backed off. That day I confronted him, as he was leaving the work place... shot my a knowing glace on his way out the door. The look said it all. I was definitely right to be cautious. We both ended up quitting for different reasons and God has led us in two separate directions. Now I am pregnant with my 3rd child! This is the biggest blessing and this man is no longer in my life.
It's no coincidence that attractive woman will come my way during Rocky moment's in my marriage. And honestly I was tempted to be unfaithful. But then I had to remind myself that a one time fling isn't worth losing everything I've gained in my marriage
Serious question. And im only asking because I struggle with the idea of marriage even as a Christian man. Do you ever wish you were never married in the first place? If not, You’d be free to flirt with attractive women as you please. Right?
While this is not my situation as I am single, this is great teaching and information when I am blessed with my Boaz. Thank you Sir!!
Praise God Tammy! Yes, store it away for another time and season. Let's pray for your Boaz to come!
Amen!
Outstanding! You have unpacked why flirting does not bring God glory. Thank you.👍🏻
Make your current relationship fun again.
oh boy this video was so timely😁....I'm currently engaged to a Christian guy......he's kind, God fearing, honest & no drama praise the Lord - I'm attracted to him on a intellectual & spiritual level mostly.......so from time to time I notice I'm now attracted to people I wasn't even attracted to before. He lives in another country so we don't spend much time together. But I'm always praying & staying obedient to God's word....... hopefully when we marry & spend more time I will have a better connection with him
jarxcistkris84 satan trying to steal from you kill your spirit an destroy your testimony
Well now I understand better why I've been cheated on in previous relationships........I'm always the one being loyal and focused on the relationship but these worldly dudes ain't loyal😂. So I'm now stepping out in faith......I ditched the last one & got saved instead......became obedient to God & put him 1st in my life.....and now I'm engaged to a god fearing christian man so that's a testimony indeed😁......I'm still focused on God 1st & I never want to put anything before him ever again.......read my Bible everyday.....pray & stay obedient to his word.......sharing the good news every opportunity I get......I've never been this happy & fulfilled🙌
Hey Jarx, thanks for sharing with us. You definitely need attraction but it's not the most important thing. But if you have lost all attraction for someone then I wouldn't move forward with marriage because that can be a red flag and a very serious problem.
THE BEAT by Allen Parr I haven't lost attraction - I'm just saying that how I'm attracted to the person is different than my previous relationships........in other words the attraction is not a highly physical one but more intellectual & spiritual.
If I find myself attracted to someone els I just don't talk to and avoid that person.
BreenSings It but that’s rude :(
BreenSings It i cant do that bc the other kid likes me too but they also like someone else
This was me with an old friend and so I totally avoided her, stopped calling at her house to hang out...sad, I've not seen her for 20 years or so.
same
I do this but I cant trust myself enough. I always doubt myself thinking im a cheater and other stuff.
Great message. I dont who are the 30 people who disliked this video. This video is dead on. Everyone thinks the grass is greener on the other side.....only to find weeds!.
In such a situation, my advice is to avoid the person as much as is possible (like you mentioned) and whenever you do have to speak to him or her, stay on topic. In other words, say what you need to say and then leave. No need to be jovial and open. Of course, be polite but you don't have ask those common questions like, "Did anything interesting over the weekend?" It may sound harsh but not taking these steps is really opening the door to building a relationship with this person. That being said, great job Allen and God bless.
Yesterday I met a lady who happens to be a director of an organization, we got to talk about places in Mexico since she has Mexican roots, she took down her mask and I got to see her face.
She was naturally beautiful and I even told her she is 😄 and she was flattered.
But I’m already in a relationship… I can’t do anything else.
If it's simply finding someone attractive, but you don't have any desire at all to forsake your partner to be with them, that's one thing. But when you feel a strong desire to be with the other person and that doesn't go away, it's a sign that your current relationship is in danger.
And from there, your options are determined by your current level of commitment. If you're in a marriage, then you have no choice. No contact. Don't even fantasize about the idea. Your commitment is to the person you married, and them alone.
If you're not married to the person you're currently with, then you need to take some time to seriously reflect upon your desire for another person.
Because at the end of the day, Christian dating is supposed to help you figure out whether or not you can get married to another person or not. That involves forsaking all other lovers, and loving each other to the point where you will die and even serve one another.
So if you fully realized that you can't have that kind of relationship with your current partner, and you know that you'd at least be better off alone than with them, then break up with them as soon as possible.
Don't try to have your cake and eat it too by still being in a relationship that you feel like is doomed to end soon while trying to set up your next relationship with the new person. That's not fair on your partner, and certainly doesn't create a foundation of trust and mutual respect for the other person if you do end up with them.
And if you genuinely realize that you love your current partner that way, and they do to you, then don't forsake that. Finding that kind of relationship is incredibly rare, and attraction alone can never be a threat to that kind of relationship.
And no, you wouldn't be an evil or bad person if you stuck with a partner you don't want to be with. You'd only be evil if you continue to lie to yourself and your partner that you love them when you truly don't, and stick with them when you could have both moved on and found better partners.
Awesome video. I would suggest that anyone in this situation should get godly perspective in prayer. Also, it takes communication and opening up to the spouse.
Yes it does. Well said Cory. Wise man...
How could you open up to the other person?
Opening up? what are you going to say, I’m attracted to somebody else, and fantasizing with him instead of you? you never talk about it, ever!
@@kierrarichardson80 It’s important to find a way to talk it out. It’s not easy but you can’t go on wasting your time with someone who doesn’t have all of your affection.
@@carlel121 I can understand your point but if you have a desire for someone else, the person you are with will not get all of you. It’s not an easy thing but it has to start with being open and honest.
Am just happy you gave practical advice instead of saying just pray the feelings away. Thats the only I have hearing for years as a christian to just pray everything away
This is EXACTLY what i needed, thank you!
When you are single
You don't have to worry about these issues.
Attraction is common but don't act on it.
Keep God first.
THANK GOD FOR ALLOWING ME TO COME ACROSS THIS VIDEO.
I was going down this path. I absolutely agree with what your saying. I should stop the bad before it happens.
Wow! I like the honesty in handling this topic Allen....""out there will always be people that seemingly are more beautiful,intelligent, smarter.....than your spouse....
this is exactly what I needed to hear.
You explain things so well! I'm a new subscriber and really have been enjoying the topics! Stuff most people don't want to talk about or don't know how! Keep it up! I've been sending a lot of the videos to people I think need them and to ministration staff!
Hey Niecybaby1960! That is awesome. So glad that you have subscribed! You will truly enjoy this channel, the free resources and the community of people we have who engage quite a bit on the videos. God bless you and thanks for subbing!
Get intimate with the Lord. Ask God to strengthen your faith in times of warfare. and just simply RUN to Jesus. Accountability is huge too!!
I finally found the right vid!!
I just started going out with this girl and I realized I’m more into this guy who I’m positive is into me but I don’t want to break off the relationship with the girl because I don’t want to hurt her and things
Thanks for the comments.. currently struggling with the attraction to the other person who honestly makes me feel like going ahead. We talk and agree to stop but the attraction lingers..
Needed to hear this. I've been with a guy for almost 3 years but I have always had strong attraction for a guy that didn't want a relationship now he gives me attention but I must ignore it because I will ruin something stable and good. But the temptation is like fire I want it but gotta stay away.
Posey ik that feeling ):
Dont do it....trust me. Disengage from that attraction.
So how do you solve it ?
@@lzyt6709 I suggest you look for their shortcomings. You find someone's attractive because of their strengths, but you can also uncrush them because of their shortcomings. At lease this works for me.
Flirting is what I do. And I can’t imagine living in a world where I cannot do so because I’m married. I’d rather never get married and never find out if I have what it takes to commit. I’d rather not set myself up to fail by getting married.
So i’m in a healthy relationship, and as a child i used to always like this guy. This guy is my best friend, and he told me he didn’t like me back, i accepted and forced myself to move on. After a couple months of my relationship i started to notice multiple signs but i ignored it. And now it’s really getting on to me, i don’t want to let this person go because i’m still trying to get him over his ex. And with my boyfriend, he really means the world. But i want to stop and try to get out of being in love with my best friend- please help me- what the hell do i do?
What I like about this dood is that even though he is religious he doesn’t wave off reality. A lots of People say oh nothing can happen to me cuz got protects me. I can’t get coronavirus cuz god is with me they loose the consept of reality. This dood is realistic and not unoing like all this people that talk about god a lot.
How could u open up to ur partner without starting an argument or someone feeling hurt.?
nice message in a nutshell. it could be spoken for a while without an end..remember our commitment a known devil is better than an unknown angel,resist and the devil will flee this verse realy works.
Good message! Substantive and succinct! Thanks for sharing.
Thank you so much for making this video. I really needed the advice you gave. I don’t have any family or friends that I trust enough to ask for this kind of guidance! Thank you thank you thank you and God bless.
I’d also like to add that I prayed and prayed and prayed to God to show me what I need to do. Through His gospel I now understand.
Thank you again 🙏🏻
i had this friend. once my ex left me, he was there for me and helped me through it all. we started dating a month after. we’ve been dating for 4 months now but now we rarely hang out. he never talks to me, and if we do hang out, he never says ‘i love you’. but now i have this other friend. we’ve been friends for 6 months. however, he makes me feel ways i can’t explain. every time i’m around him i always get nervous and start smiling like crazy. he makes me feel so confident about my self. but here’s the difficult part. now, my bf has been spending time with new recently. and still makes me feel loved. but my friend is just-.. amazing. i don’t know whether i should stay with my bf, be with my friend, ignore my friend so that i can focus on my bf, or just hide it all.
help?
how did it go1 year later?
leave ur boyfriend because he deserves better
So good... am in a distance relationship hahaha. This is so good
Hey,I know I previously commented before on tattoos I read your article on it which was very interesting and well presented,Now I'm also comfused on rather God is against cosmetics such as surgery and makeup,It would mean so much to me if you discuss this topic.Thank you for your previous response 😄and if you already have please post a link 😆
Yes, I've gotten the question regarding make-up before. Here is my stance. If make-up is used to enhance one's beauty then I see no problem with it. If it is used because someone does not feel good about themselves behind the make-up, then that is another deeper issue that needs to be addressed. It illustrates that something is missing and that you only feel good about yourself behind a mask. Those are my thoughts.
I was married once to my beloved hubby after that i find no other man more attractive then him, but because im a bigger size n hes a smaller size, im not really that attractive to him long story of heartaches n sadness but eventually were not together for 5 years now i end up being a widow now for 5 years lol
Pastor, This happen to me a month or so ago. The eye contact along with a great smile was giving me the business. I made it through, but she came back a few days later and introduced me to a family member, so shortly after that meet and greet..... I walked to my car and left my job for about twenty minutes... When I returned she was gone... #Whew
This was so great Allen! I really needed this
Once the person notices their attraction, it is wise to open a dialog with their significant other. Be careful not to hurt them with words. Your truth can still be sin, if it hurts others. Use tact to raise the issue. Do not say “you”, but use “I” statements. If sweeter words can not be found, ask the congregation’s leader to mediate. It is unnatural for men and women to communicate. So, supernatural assistance may be needed. Most importantly, do not give up. It is never greener on the other side. This is more for married people, but use as necessary. There also comes self-evaluation, and humbling ones self. It does not feel natural, but when the relationship matures with our lord in the middle, it is better then the puppy love stage(lust stage). Last thing I will put in, is keeping your guard up. Not allowing the ways man, to keep you from the joy God has attended for you.
I agree with some of these points but I don’t believe if it was there at one point you can get it back. Sometimes too much has been done or said and you can’t get it back. This you must walk away. Also, in my case, I met someone else while married on a fluke..wasn’t looking but I was extremely unhappy. Stuck financially and wanted out because of abuse. In this case, cheating to me is not wrong. He didn’t deserve my faithfulness.
im watching this cos im on the other side of this topic. i cant do this anymore. i just wanna breakup with this guy, but he begs me and forces me to stay in our relationship even tho he is into someone else. i just feel like im being torn apart everyday of my fucking life.
Leave him.. just go hun.
I am in same situation, tho married, seperated for over 10 years, and it fucking sucks, tried everything, me counciling the works but she refused to proud, to relegious, to stuck up, judgmental, sexless, fussy, judgemental and I'm expected to put up with that, live in negitivity visiting her always seeking some affection and never getting it, only get the silent treament and spend money on her. Have no kids to her, but I do have a daughter to my ex that I never married because it was stopped by her parents and some age difference too. It had all the passion, but gave it all up for relegious reasons, was not born again, new nothing about grace, always repenting for sins when the bible says we cannot repent of sins, but we repent by changing our mind.....We should be evenly yoked in marrige even in christ... This business the bible says we cannot devoice if the negitive partner or spouse not want a devoice, how ridiculous is that, how soul damaging, robs self -esteem and self worth, sucidial feelings, going to hell anyway, so might as well devoice myself. In your situation sister, your not married right? so no problem leave the guy easy for you, hard for me.....So you still love this guy even tho he into someone else? what a beautifal woman you are, you deserve better. Doest he tell you he loves you, adores you??? Is the sex great that keeps you together? Outside of marrige a good sex relationship is fine with me if that was my choice but marrige it has to be true love, romance, and evenly yoked in christ. merry xmas sister. you can contact my facebook darryl kirky, here in australia as if I dont get back with my ex mother of my daughter for any reasons that is stopped again, I am going to need a real woman friend. Im done with the insanity of biblical judgments that can lead a person to suicide. I want out of my marrige and be with a woman who inspires greatness in me to serve the lord evenly yoked. The mother of my daughter was once relegious like I used to be and now in no mans land, but if she accepted the grace of jesus christ we I would take her back and marry her.. Until then I am still done with my marrige and I will end up with the right woman and it surely arnt or not my fucking sexless ex. I should stop giving her money too as I have no kids to her... You free to leave your guy, but if the sex is great, that would be hard, but if its true love in christ which it is not, then get married... Lust without love is a cursed sin and that is what jesus meant not to lust as otherwise a man would have to go around with his fucking eyes closed all the time to avoid lust........Contact me if you need a friend. god bless you..... cheers. darryl kirky perth western australia.
Leave hun.
Thank you. This helped me.
I’m so conflicted... I went to Homecoming with my friend Jack, we both know we like each other, we both assumed we were going to date any day now... but then I met this guy Lucas... and he’s amazing. I told Lucas about Jack and now I think he won’t be interested in me (he really seemed to be before) I wanna be with both of them so incredibly bad. What do I do?? Whatever happens will hurt the other
2o0k subss yay!!! Congrats bro! Your content needs to be heard as it is biblically based, sound & edifying.
people pray for me idk why but every single day for about 2 weeks know i been getting some toughts in my head that god is mad at me because ived sinned i cant get it out of my head i just keep getting toughts that hes going to punish me and i cant stand those toughts i want to prove to god that i believe in him and that i have. faith ive stooped doing sins like smoking or drinking those were easy but i cant get rid of these toughts
Maria Arana i'm no pastor or bible scholar, but that could just be the devil trying to make you feel unworthy of receiving Christ in your life again, using your sins of which you have already repented & turned away from to discourage you from having a relationship with God.
Just keep seeking God and ask for clarity on your relationship with Him, and ask Him to get rid of those thoughts for you if they didn't come from Him. I struggle with that too sometimes so I just pray to Him directly and ask Him to show me what Ive done wrong and ask whether He has truly forgiven me. And it always help to continue turning from your sins to show God that you are serious about it. Just seek Him and He will help you, im sure 😊
Maria Arana read you Bible.
Even you didnot undertand.
Just keep on read.
Read everyday..
You should check out The Bondage Breaker by Neil Anderson. This sounds like the enemy is trying to attach you with thoughts of condemnation. James 4:7-8 and Ephesians 6:10-18.
What gets me about this kind of situation is a lot of Christian guys will go to great lengths to AVOID & not talk to a woman they find attractive, even if they work with her or go to the same church. The comments below prove this. But this is unbelievably immature & shallow when most of the time they don’t know anything about her or whether they’d be compatible with her anyway. It makes the woman feel like she must be seen as Jezebel or something! It’s not on to rudely ignore someone when you should be a source of godly & brotherly encouragement to them either in church or in the workplace. Gosh, this isn’t primary school. Some of these men need to seriously grow up. She most likely wouldn’t be interested anyway . Allow yourself to admire her beauty in a godly way, but gosh, treat her like a respectable human being !
Theyre taken. They shouldn't entertain the company of another woman. The flesh is weak but the spirit is willing...they kniw this and are doing their best to honor their significant other. Many women or people in general have no problem stealing a man or woman.. That's reality.
This sounds more for those married. What if you are not even engaged yet but knew the other person before them?
very nice teaching...
Not having or looking for contact with that person if not nessesary.
this was so useful
I prayed so hard last night for God to take away the intense attraction I have for my neighbor. He lives right downstairs and I often hear him ( sexually). At first I thought it was gross but one day our eyes met and I felt like I had been hit by lightning and I dont know if he feels the same. I see him only every now and then but when I do, he stops whatever he's doing and stares at me. I stared back the last time. I have a husband and I believe he has a girlfriend and I don't want to be that kind of person who doesnt care. It doesn't help that he is the best looking man I have ever seen in my life. Help me Lord. This is tough. And I don't think he is a guy who cares about right or wrong or relationships. I dont think he would be good for me even if we were both single. He has had alot of women in his apt. I have so rarely ever in my life felt for anyone, what I felt for him that day our eyes met that day that I felt like it should be pursued, like it was natural but it is wrong, at least this is what I keep trying to tell myself.
This is excellent advice
Awesome video
Allen can u do a video on why sometimes why our prayers are un answered
Hey Experiment 625. I believe I have a video on that. Try this link! ruclips.net/video/6_C36nGhvt4/видео.html
I was going to skip this videos because I don't belive in that god, but the advices are so good, it really calmed me down, so thank you, so much.
Hey Friend! I enjoy your videos very much, and I always take the time to hear them. My husband and I are both mildly on the Spectrum and neither of us can really relate to this. I’m not sure, but I think that my husband and I might be what is known as Demisexual, which means one is only attracted to someone with whom they share an emotional attachment. I looked it up and now I feel that it would explain a lot. He never had a relationship before me and had never even felt the desire to kiss anyone. I had been married but had never been attracted to any other man, besides my childhood crush, whom I still never had sexual feelings for. I don’t have lesbian tendencies, so I knew it wasn’t that. I was so upset when my teenage friends talked about what they wanted to do sexually with men that they just thought were attractive.. Gross! My husband’s family describes him as being exactly the same way growing up. It took a long time for him to kiss me.. A long time. Our courtship was also a bit long. However, we were always very affectionate and by the the time we were ready to get married, we couldn’t resist one another. We just can’t get enough of each other. His father once asked when we were courting if he was homosexual because he never showed interest in females... I asked if he showed interest in males, and he said.. Well, actually no. He shows curiosity about human behavior and psychology in general and is known as the innocent guy in high school. The weird guy. I was the same. Just never had that interest, but I am soooooooooooooo attracted to him. The attraction between us feels cosmic. It’s nuts, because we were both basically “aesexual” most of our lives, and now he and I are “naturals” with one another and just can’t stay away from one another. It’s powerful - like a light sprung on. I always wonder why the Bible never mentions people like us.. Any insight?
Great perspective. I’m on the spectrum (‘high-functioning’) too and you’re right there’s not much understanding of people like us and the way we behave and see things. I could only focus on one person too. Wish to find a connection like yours one day!
It helps to know that Satan disguises himself as an angel of light to tempt us. Let us take EVERY thought captive into the obedience of Christ.
You are so right! Amen
Real talk brother
I recently had this temptation. I realize it’s just a matter of feeling like your in a chase again. It’s the novelty and newness of the feeling of what could happen. It happens quick but you have to act fast. I cut the relationship off and explained to the individual that we probably should probably keep our distance in person and virtually. It wasn’t easy because of the temptation and also the reality that nothing had really happened. However I felt it was wise to stop well before anything occurred.
But what if the person you like isn't out of lust or anything? Does that still make it consider as sin? What if you found the real one given that you are not married yet?
This channel’s cool. I learned about it via your interview with Ashely Empowers.
What if she only has a bf? It's not like its her husband, so I think she's fair game.
Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.
John 14:6 KJV
I went on a date with this wonderful Christian boy, but he said we wouldn't work since he was going back to his home country for a year. So a couple month later i started dating this boy, he is wonderful, kind, funny and loving but hes not a Christian at all, but now the first guy has returned and he keeps comeing into my work and i don't know what to do cause I still like him. Please help
You should leave ur now current b0yfriend !! because he deserves better
@@lanaw7304 I broke up with him yesterday because yeah even if nothing happens with the other guy he deserves better
Is it okay to be friends with that person, without any flirting if I don't have any romantic intentions but crave for a brotherly affection with that person?
I never tried finding a sweetheart. I have been too busy playing video games. I do have youtube videos about my memories, the bible, and some strategy games that I play like Total Annihilation and Total Annihilation Kingdoms.
William Hackman Hi! Are you still playing video games? I like gangstar vegas. 😁
What if you were never attracted to the person you married to begin with? Well, you done messed up lmao
Yep you messed up and that's your own fault to begin with.
So why did you marry this person to begin with?
God hasn't necessarily made your significant other. There's a difference between people we chose by our own beliefs and between partners who are truly from God. God gave us free will but never push the whole responsibility on God when we've made our own choices.
What about flirtimg when your single, to someone who is single?.
But anyway thanks for your video it helped. Yeah truth is I have a little crush on someone but I have a boyfriend. But I'm not being flirty with this guy who likes me I'm being the friend zone to him. I'm controlling myself trying to keep it cool. Because I love my relationship I'm with now. I don't just want to break up off my current relationship. Cuz if I did I'd be crying and broken for hurting his feelings. This guy I have a little crush on ask me if I wanted his number. I didn't take it I didn't text him when he gave it to me. I didn't say I love you either. I'm being on the friend zone.
Am currently in a relationship, but (not married, Recently I meet a former college mate, am beginning to get the feelings of falling in love all over again, my current gf is a nice woman but not without her weakness. this other lady is really nice as well and what attracts me most about her isn't her beauty as they are both beautiful it's her maturity and take on life, we are also alike in alot of stuff and easier to get along with.. I love my girlfriend but am just not sure anymore I don't want to hurt her feelings and at the same time I want to make the best decision concerning who am going to spend the rest of my life with. Please help
Broke up with ur girlfriend , she deserves better
Thank you ❤
What if the person you're attracted to is your neighbor?
My situation is the same I'm attracted yo a woman who works infront of my work I cannot avoid her we're always seeing each other and i have serious girlfriend in the same time . Wtf should i do ! It's nightmare maybe i'll pray my neighbor getting boyfriend soon and releases me from that temptation
hey brother, your videos really help me. I was seeing this video many times 2 weeks ago ans I didnt watch this though I had a feeling to do it. Earlier when I was at my work, i saw this girl our new sales staff and I am attracted to her. This is very wrong. i must overcome. thank you for this vid bro. thank you for encouragement . God bless you.
Hey Bryan, you are so welcome. Yes, it's a part of life and a struggle for us all. Many people just don't admit it. Thank you for being honest with us and with yourself. God bless,
it's feel guilty bro.... when you r in relationship and feel attracted to someone else...
What if ur partner isn't really doing anything in the relationship and don't really make me happy and the person I like my bestfriend treats me better but he far away
It's called a "SPELL" and "TEMPORARY". Cause it was never real. That's why when cheaters finally get into a serious relationship with each other, majority of the time, it never last. Relationship is like a vacation- it's only fun in the beginning when it's new and short term. Stay too long, reality will hit- got the bills to pay, weeds growing in your yard to pull and trim. House breaking apart. Same old problems always arise. That's why some people change partner often- cause they crave and want to find that emotional high again and again like a drug. Consequently, these kind of people end up being alone and lonely because they never set up root and invested in a real home when later they need it. Sure. While your permanent home may not be as grand as some. And you will always have to work hard putting in the effort to maintain it. At least whenever you come home, you will always have a place that you belong and those that love you no matter what like your family.
Just go a be with them. If they bad, they bad.
But lusting on someone is committing adultry in his heart
Run!
I am not bragging that i can steal boyfriends but i think i do attract them. maybe as long as they are not married they can still seperate. im not saying it is good to steal boyfriends tho
I was in a 3 year relationship with my boyfriend and everything was good. But deep down I had the curiosity to talk to other guys and see if they liked me. I don’t really know why I wanted to to do that because I really really loved my boyfriend, he was always treating well etc...he was the dream guy of many girls. Anyway, one day a guy texted me “hello” and I took that as a chance to put my curiosity in a test so I answered him. I didn’t want anything serious to happen, just a little talk..but We started talking and some days after the flirting was extremely obvious in our messages from both sides. One day we accidentally met and really felt something. I didn’t know what to do, I loved my boyfriend so much but my attention was on this new guy. For the next 2 or 3 weeks I was very confused about what I should do. I took the decision to break up with my boyfriend and start something new with the other guy. Then, when I was with my new boyfriend I was very happy but as soon as I returned home I started crying because I had regretted my decision. This situation kept going for about 3 months. It was a very stressing and confusing time for me and again I didn’t know what to do. One day I sat down and thought of all the memories I had with my ex and realized I only wanted to be with him. So, the next day I told my boyfriend I wanted to break up. The thing is that he was so addicted to me and really loved me in addition to me where I was just seeking for attention and maybe the feeling of other men seeing me in an erotic way.
I completely messed it up. So, I told him I wanted to break up and the next day I returned to my ex and we were okay again. But the other guy saw me with him after 3 days of our break up and he literally went bananas. He stated texting me and threatening me that he would tell my boyfriend that I cheated on him etc
After some time things finally went well...but guess what..
Now almost after 9 months of this situation my boyfriend has changed and I find myself a lot of times missing the other guy...
damn thats rough. I feel the same about my bf, but have been there thinking about my ex's that I really love and miss sometimes...😫
Smh
You are evil. You are fucking evil
That's really rough how are you doing now? Are you still with anyone? Are you still with the ex that you broke up with? I'm in a little situation myself. this guy has a crush on me and I have a little crush on him too but I have a boyfriend. I love him. And I'm happy with him. I have a little crush on this other guy I feel kind of nervous around him when I see this guy in public. But the crush is not serious it's small not that big and serious. I'm not flirting with him. I'm not saying I love you. I'm just being a friend zone person to him. I'm doing the best I can to the control myself. Cuz I love my relationship I'm in with now.
What do I do we’re not darting but we kinda are and I have strong feelings for someone for a long time before I met the other girl
But I feel God is putting this crush on my heart, I'm not married btw
This doesn’t appear to be biblical at all. In that sense, this is the opinion of Mr. Parr-I have a lot of respect for Mr. Parr. I think the word attraction is being misused here. We are all humans and can find the opposite sex attractive. But that’s no different from noticing a nice looking car. We also can notice if a man or woman is well spoken, funny, etc. However, one can’t be really attracted to someone else without some kind of effort. I am guessing Mr. is taking about noticing qualities rather than having some sort of relationship with that person. I also think we’re not giving God enough credit when it comes to being happy with what we have. The people in relationships who find others so attractive to the point where they would need to avoid them are people who have been looking for such things.
can you do a video about Transgenderism....my Christian friends and I had a discussion about it....they think it is judgemental to not accept it..... also can you do a video in judging...I'm so tired of other lukewarm Christians saying it's judging to stand on God's word....
my boyfriend broke up with me for someone else hmm
I'm sorry.
can you do a video on violent video games and movies and is it a sin
Yes, it is.
Lazer Fly I think they can
+skyline says who?
So are we talking about married people only? If someone has a girlfriend or a boyfriend , should they be off limits? If you know there is a mutual attraction but there is also respect for that , but the attraction continues...What to do? We’ve all had a bf or gf it didn’t work out with, so this is an odd situation. Stay away from the other person completely?
I have a boyfriend now but I have a crush on someone else and that person is worried that I have feelings for him how do I keep it just friends with him?
Sorry late comment don't know how you doing now if you're with your boyfriend or you're with the other person now? But I am in the same since situation kind of too. I have a little crush on someone but it's not that serious. But I have a boyfriend I love him to death. I'm not just going to break off my current relationship. Cuz I don't want to ruin my relationship that I'm happy with. My current boyfriend already met my parents. So It just wouldn't make sense and my parents will be so confused saying what's going on. I don't want them to think something's wrong with my current relationship. So I think it's a better choice to be friends with this guy that has a crush on me as well or I just stay away from him. This new guy blockes me for no reason as well when he thinks I'm at him. It's like he's mad that I won't go with him. I am just being friendly with him friend zone.
If i was in a Relationship With my Boyfriend But Thinking about Celebrate's who are men in a Band Members form Big time rush what should i do?