Now that I have all of this information, the help has stopped when I need it now more than ever. My family has brushed all of this to the side (swept it under the rug), and not validating me for who I really am; yes I try to fake it with jokes, humor too, although I'm in desperate need of further professional help. I hope things are different for you, that you're still receiving the help and validation you need. I wish you the best of luck and thanks for making these awesome videos!
Oh, one other thing I sort of related to that you mentioned was that you were depressed, but if you got interested in some subject or activity, you would get excited, and that would make it seem like you were going from low to high, maybe bipolar, etc. I had some version of this, myself. I would be going around depressed, then it would occur to me to start a project, and suddenly, I'd be all enthusiastic. Then it would burn out after awhile, and I'd go back to being depressed.
Great story! I vicariously enjoyed your cleaning up of the aquarium - that must've been quite satisfying. My own stay in a psych ward was shorter and a bit different. I was 19 or so, and in music school. They actually let me practice in the room there -- they said that would help get the other patients out into the day room! It certainly did. I hung out and talked to a few, and they decided I was a "plant" - like I'd been put there to get them to talk.
That may have been because a number of them had paranoid schizophrenia. The only other thing I remember from it that was really quite eerie is that I heard some girl howling and wailing "daddy! oh daddy!" for quite awhile. Later, someone said that it was actually one of the mental health workers there ... interesting. Maybe something there had pushed her buttons, or she was just really into Janov primal scream, or something! I'll never know!
Thank you for sharing these in depth experiences about this time in your life. I've had similar experiences too, a couple of times. Funny thing, I liked it there too. Although I didn't find out everything I wanted, they did provide a good start. Further help finally brought about some more focused diagnoses of Autistic Disorder, PDD-NOS, Aspergers, Non-Verbal Learning Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder, and Anxiety Disorder.
Well I'm in year 11 and I've been depressed for a long time now, until I went on study leave away from everyone! I think I have aspergers syndrome ,your videos are really helpful and showed me the depth of aspergers syndrome,I never thought I had it until we had to study autism in the child development GCSE
I also feel like I do so much for approval. When I was in high school one girl said "people at school told me not to talk to you because you care too much what other people think". Later only in life I realized people do a lot less things than I do in order to gain pride or get others approval. Like people enjoy things like preparing a nice meal or talking to friends, or dancing. Everything I did felt like I did it for pride.
This is precisely it. Also, I always found the "loss of interest" part of depression to only vaguely apply when I was depressed. There was always something going on. Whether it was an interest in the mental disorder I thought I had, or the fish tank, I never completely wallowed in my own depression. To be completely stripped of interests would be to die for me.
I was referred to psychiatrist who basically coerced me into staying in the psych ward for observation. I wasn’t any risk to myself but my behavior was strange enough that she believed I was psychotic. It was a terrible experience, I felt like a prisoner
Life skill and intelligence I totally agree are serrate from each other. And I think I started thinking about this a lot more than I did before when I looked at Aspergers.
Do you not experience as many depression parts? Because not experiencing the typical depression tendency with Bipolar, only mostly manic during my episodes, I thought it was not Bipolar 1 even though I quickly somehow was diagnosed with it. I always felt the diagnosis was so fast. How could they know only from a day what happened to me, because they gave me this diagnosis the second day after getting admitted due to some unusual behavior. And also I remember now that in my childhood and all since then I frequently have an extremely happy mood. I remember going outside during recess in Elementary school and laughing non stop for fun.
Now that I have all of this information, the help has stopped when I need it now more than ever. My family has brushed all of this to the side (swept it under the rug), and not validating me for who I really am; yes I try to fake it with jokes, humor too, although I'm in desperate need of further professional help. I hope things are different for you, that you're still receiving the help and validation you need. I wish you the best of luck and thanks for making these awesome videos!
Oh, one other thing I sort of related to that you mentioned was that you were depressed, but if you got interested in some subject or activity, you would get excited, and that would make it seem like you were going from low to high, maybe bipolar, etc. I had some version of this, myself. I would be going around depressed, then it would occur to me to start a project, and suddenly, I'd be all enthusiastic. Then it would burn out after awhile, and I'd go back to being depressed.
Great story! I vicariously enjoyed your cleaning up of the aquarium - that must've been quite satisfying. My own stay in a psych ward was shorter and a bit different. I was 19 or so, and in music school. They actually let me practice in the room there -- they said that would help get the other patients out into the day room! It certainly did. I hung out and talked to a few, and they decided I was a "plant" - like I'd been put there to get them to talk.
That may have been because a number of them had paranoid schizophrenia. The only other thing I remember from it that was really quite eerie is that I heard some girl howling and wailing "daddy! oh daddy!" for quite awhile. Later, someone said that it was actually one of the mental health workers there ... interesting. Maybe something there had pushed her buttons, or she was just really into Janov primal scream, or something! I'll never know!
Thank you for sharing these in depth experiences about this time in your life. I've had similar experiences too, a couple of times. Funny thing, I liked it there too. Although I didn't find out everything I wanted, they did provide a good start. Further help finally brought about some more focused diagnoses of Autistic Disorder, PDD-NOS, Aspergers, Non-Verbal Learning Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder, and Anxiety Disorder.
Sort of "self medicating" with the excitement of a project or subject. I don't think I really had any bipolar component.
you seem happier and/or have more energy in this video than the usual ones. :)
Well I'm in year 11 and I've been depressed for a long time now, until I went on study leave away from everyone! I think I have aspergers syndrome ,your videos are really helpful and showed me the depth of aspergers syndrome,I never thought I had it until we had to study autism in the child development GCSE
I also feel like I do so much for approval. When I was in high school one girl said "people at school told me not to talk to you because you care too much what other people think". Later only in life I realized people do a lot less things than I do in order to gain pride or get others approval. Like people enjoy things like preparing a nice meal or talking to friends, or dancing. Everything I did felt like I did it for pride.
This is precisely it. Also, I always found the "loss of interest" part of depression to only vaguely apply when I was depressed. There was always something going on. Whether it was an interest in the mental disorder I thought I had, or the fish tank, I never completely wallowed in my own depression. To be completely stripped of interests would be to die for me.
Thanks for the suggestion. The video is up, but it's lengthy.
I love your videos. Don't stop.
I was referred to psychiatrist who basically coerced me into staying in the psych ward for observation. I wasn’t any risk to myself but my behavior was strange enough that she believed I was psychotic. It was a terrible experience, I felt like a prisoner
I hope you find someone that can back you up rather than question or suppress the details of your situation. Are you going for therapy?
Life skill and intelligence I totally agree are serrate from each other. And I think I started thinking about this a lot more than I did before when I looked at Aspergers.
oh my god. Mine also happened in grade 11. And I actually got diagnosed as Bipolar 1!
I saw! Great video.
so whats the story behind your actual diagnosis?
Do you not experience as many depression parts? Because not experiencing the typical depression tendency with Bipolar, only mostly manic during my episodes, I thought it was not Bipolar 1 even though I quickly somehow was diagnosed with it. I always felt the diagnosis was so fast. How could they know only from a day what happened to me, because they gave me this diagnosis the second day after getting admitted due to some unusual behavior.
And also I remember now that in my childhood and all since then I frequently have an extremely happy mood. I remember going outside during recess in Elementary school and laughing non stop for fun.
lolz awesome videos