I may be the ghoster (is that a word?) in my situation. I’ve known her over 30 yrs. I helped through cancer, her divorce from my brother etc. Then she betrayed me in some really thoughtless ways but I forgave her. I even apologized just to end the bad blood (though I was the “injured party!) When she came out of left field one day blaming me for my brothers legal end to paying child support (for a 23 yr old college age kid) she sounded nasty, petty and just not nice. Bitter. I realized I was simply done. I stopped any effort to communicate. Though it still hurts, I know she is actual quite a narcissist who never valued me as a person, just her manipulation of my kindness.
I had a close friend who said she thought of me as "family". But, our friendship somehow just disappeared, for no apparent reason. She sadly passed away about a year and a half ago. It still hurts to this day. I really needed that connection with her. 😞
So very true Laura…I felt so guilty and even though I helped this person move not once, but twice, due to flood damage, I was floored when she just dumped me after 5 years. No email, no calls, no texts! So hurtful, the very least a friend can do, or have the respect to give an explanation. At least pets love you unconditionally! ❤
I had to ghosted someone because the “ friend “ is not mature enough to have a decent conversation, I like to tell the “ friend “ what went wrong in the relationship but I know she will have no insight and she will get into arguments instead of reflect on how the relationship can be repaired and move forward positively. I have no other choice.
Good questions. My mother always taught me that you only need one really good friend, and to some degree I agree with that, but I also now know it’s incredibly needy and smothering to put that much pressure on someone!
I just found your channel and already I’m looking back on my failed friendships and I’m seeing the signs I chose to ignore. Several friends I still keep in touch with, but no longer have expectations of a deep relationship.
Wow you hit the nail on the head. Friends for over 50 years. Sent an email to me to tell me she was done with me This came two weeks after a very pleasant phone call .also not the first time she had sent me a message like this. This person is house bound, divorced for years with children she is always at odds with. I still work am married and live three hours away. I am going to honor he wish this time to remove herself from my life. I already feel a weight lifted from my shoulders
This happened to me a few years back. My closest friend of 25 years (we were like sisters) downgraded our friendship to the point where it just couldn’t continue. I couldn’t change her ‘change’ towards me and our friendship. We are both now in our early 50s. Time has healed. You get used to not having this person in your life anymore and other people kind of fill that gap I guess over time. It’s been a life lesson for me.
Many years ago, even before cell phones, i ghosted a so called friend i had since junior high/high school and into our thirties. I just got tired of her selfishness and her antics. After so many years i needed to move on. She had moved out of state but came back to visit family. We made plans for dinner at my house. She never called or showed up. I was pretty irritated and just let it go. We would write letters pretty often and i got a letter, thinking i would get an explanation i was glad to get the letter. Not one word, not a im sorry, nothing, just like nothing happened. I never responded although she wrote several other letters. I decided that i didn't have time or the inclination to put up with her crap anymore.
Hi Laura, I discovered your channel a few weeks ago. This is my favourite clip so far. It resonates with me. It’s a bit late at night right now for me to share my stories but I hope to do so at some point. Thank you for sharing your personal experiences along with your loving advice and guidance.
I don't have a close friend and don't expect to ever have another one in this life time. At 80, and with no reliable way to travel, I just have to be happy by myself. It isn't easy, as I'm not naturally a hermit, and it will probably shorten my life, since I have stage 4 breast cancer, but I accept that this is my life and I have to make the most of it.
Keeping you in my prayers! Glad you found my channel. There are lots of online chat groups that you might find interesting. No matter what your interests. I even saw some libraries have online reading/ discussion groups.
People grow and change just like the world does. I read the other day, "Just because you were friends years ago doesn't mean you should be friends today." I've gone through this with more than one person that I thought was a "friend" 40 years ago. I've had to learn that they weren't true friends at all. They were people I crossed paths with in a certain era of my life. Like pieces to a puzzle, we dont fit anymore, and we move on. Its not easy. Sometimes we dont understand and have hurt feelings. We have no choice but to accept and go on. What's sad is that from now on, you're careful from now on as to who you allow in your life.😊
Love this! Such a healthy outlook. We shouldn’t be embarrassed when things don’t work out. It’s just part of life❤ plus we call everyone a friend and honestly some people never really were
I’ve often thought that the mark of a true friend is real happiness for you when things go well, celebrating in your successes and achievements. It’s easy to be sympathetic when times are tough. I think we’re lucky if we can count true friends on one hand in our lifetime, sad to say. I can’t say I’ve been stabbed in the back more than once, but I’ve experienced ghosting or what I call ‘the fadeout’ several times. Painful, but I’ve learned to move on.
I had my cousin in my life for 40 years. I grew up with her and thought of her as a sister. Then my mum died and very quickly she ghosted me. I realised quickly becouse of the large amount of time we had spent and how we kept in touch by phone if she was away. Many of your points hit home with me especially that she accused me of stalking her when I just wanted closure. She has never said why and never will now.
Some people drain you. Some love drama and you are their only outlet. This is not friendship. Yes, the red flags are always there. I have made the mistake MANY TIMES of thinking in befriending someone I could help them in some way. No more. It always ends up going south.
Thank you for this. I have really enjoyed listening to this “series”. Quite a few things you said gave me pause to think. I was hurt for a long while from a friend abruptly ending our nearly 20 year friendship and your thoughtful insights are helpful. It’s not easy finding new friends once you are over 50. Most women are already established in their friend groups. Thank you for a thought provoking topic!❤️
It’s hard to admit someone you like & have things in common with are just not into you. Tough lesson to learn but when you look back you can see the flags you so greatly ignored. Why was I the one who always added to the friendship… still learning at 70 💕
Well this one ended with a knife in the back. I’ve known her since i was 13. Im 67 now. She was the older sister of my closest friend. She used to be cruel to me, calling me thunder thighs and always demeaning me. I let all that go and we became friends, where she was in my wedding, socializing thru decades. I moved away for 10 years and when i came back she was mean, hostile, uncaring. After 2 years of this she unfriended me on Social Media. I told her sister i had had enough toxicity. my priority is to stay healthy so i can enjoy my grandchildren for decades to come. Some people do not age well. She’s an alcoholic on 2 antidepressants and Xanax. Im glad my trajectory is different.
Well there is never a way to manage someone else’s addiction. It usually becomes very toxic and never ends well….how could it. Sounds like you are much better off
Thanks for this I have really struggled after the loss of a long term friend. I feel like the you hit the nail on the head with how some friends love you to stay where you are. I did a huge life change and went travelling for a year and the real nail in the coffin is getting a job role that took her a considerable time to get. I secured the job without even trying. The jealousy she had for my success was so painful because I supported her through all her struggles. Now I realise I was a good friend and I was just her counsellor. That was a hard bitter pill to swallow and still saddens me to this day
I love how you referred to yourself as her counselor. I honestly think so many women are looking for an ‘ear’ but it’s always one way. Just cheaper than paying someone🤦🏻♀️
Thanks a lot vor your insights.🌹 Well, I had an issue with a close friend I've had known for over 40 years. And in first Hand she was better than my real sister. In the end she ghostet me. It hurtet a lot. There never was an explaination of excuse. After that I pushed the breake . A while after that a met a new woman and made friends with her. She was so grateful etc etc. Just as you said.......Now I'm ghosted again. I'm done with it now. We're all in die sixtys now and there's not much to come. They all have their besties. I don't have the energy anymore. Lots of love from Germany 🌹💓
Well don’t give up! Find things that interest you pursue the things you love and enjoy and that is where you will meet new people. Maybe a new friend, maybe a new acquaintance sometimes it’s just enough to have a few folks you enjoy grabbing a cup of coffee with❤. Thanks for sharing.
Thank for your kind words.🌹 Well, in the last years I had some health issues. In time between I was happy to have a friend to talk to besides my husband. The last one I don't run after. If I have a friendship I want a sincere one. If not it doesn't matter. I like your videos. There's s lot of truth in. Take care 🍀
I’ve decided I need to be with healthy person. I can have compassion, but I am active and find that being around younger people with similar interests keeps me energized without that intense and draining commitment of the relationships of our youth . Grateful for my dog and a job that is meaningful.
Sometimes our innocent words wound someone close. Best to ask WHAT you have done…..allow her to respond……then you will know if you unknowingly wounded her.
With all due respect, people unfortunately change whether it is better for the best or the worst... I have to believe that during my experience of my personal path of mortal existence, everyone does change....I'm a very proud man who will always understand what a man has to embrace during our personal periods of having to run the gauntlet and become better and stronger.... Unfortunately when disagreements arise.....a man has to understand that he has the public arena to embrace and to win the crowd and understand in the end that all he has is shadows and dust during the closing moments of his personal chapter....Respectively...
Thank you for such great insight on this subject… I think we or “I” have too of of expectations with certain friends and then get discouraged when they don’t meet your high standard of a true friend.. I learned the hard way😊Kind Regards Coco
There is a reason people cut others out or "ghost" someone. Most times people don't really want to know the reason. Communication is the last frontier.
@@laurahillauthor People are afraid of ghosts and don't know how to talk to them. All relationships are two ways streets. Thank you for your insightful perspective.
I have been ghosted a couple of times. The last time, I can see things I could have handled differently. But I got the buzz off message on my voice mail that was ten years ago. I no longer care.
I’m thinking of withdrawing from a 44 year friendship. For so many years my low self esteem kept me making allowances for her not being there for me. We’ve had more than one conversation in the last few years when I told her how I felt, and she agreed that she’d been a ‘rubbish friend’ and would try harder. It was recently my birthday and she made no effort to do anything for me, not even a card. I feel really hurt and that it’s time I value myself and pull back, even though I only have one other friend. She is totally oblivious that I’m even upset, and will be shocked when I tell her. I guess we just have different values; it’s so sad as we have a lot of shared history but I just can’t keep doing this to myself. 😢
You will never loose the great memories and maybe if you pull back she will rethink and come around. You just can’t get stuck on a see-saw. Sorry I know it’s hard
if a person is a user, makes nasty remarks and put downs, is bossy, oversteps boundaries then they should not be surprised when they are ghosted. that's why i dropped my neighbor like a hot potato.... and i don't feel i owe her any explanation. she knows how she was behaving and didn't care. many people who are ghosted have ruined friendships / relationships before and they never change. if you are not one of these people and you're ghosted then you have a clear conscience and consider it a blessing that a person was weeded out of your life.
It hasn't been my experience to "make friends at every age". And I think that is probably more common than those who do make friends at every age, although, I could be mistaken.
It would have been better if I clarified that’s there is no stage of life that is solely the ‘making friends’ stage, but rather it’s possible to make friends at any age as long as you want to. Thanks for your comment. Wish I had said it better
I had a long term person in my life..43 years..I had a loss due to death recently and this person ...living a block away...could not manage to come over and even give a hug...six months pass..and a couple of weeks ago...I finally told her of the expirence she gave me and the truth of how it effected to me...and the response she gave was my first reality of what a true 'gasligher' is...she said...I really need to do something about my anger...and the county has mental health help available for me. WOW...I was not even angry when I told her of my truth of her non action as it were... All I could say was ...she never holds her self accountable..( there had been many similar situations thru the years of being her 'friend)..her response to that was...I don't know her. Well, actually I do.....and now more than ever. it's funny because ...she actually was probably looking in the mirror when she responded to me as she did...but I am sure she would never see that reflection. oh, what a relief it is to have that energy out of my life...
What a painful way to find out who a person really is. I hope you know that this is all about them and their shortcomings and has nothing to do with you. Some people have no empathy, and yes some are just downright selfish and cruel. You’re smart to get help if you need it. ❤❤
Women need to get real about why they want some women as friends and not others. Too many women are treating youtube speakers like this one like friends. Too sad!
Concerning the vaccine beliefs. I might be wrong, but many of us who were/are against the vaccine are viewing it from a biblical aspect. And it absolutely terrifies us when our friends so willy-nilly think nothing of jumping thru our government’s hoops. Not sure which side you were on in your debate, but yes, I certainly can understand how friendships might go adrift. THIS subject can definitely cause people to be testy.
I’d love to see a video about navigating work friendships. Many times when I’ve moved to another position or workplace those friendships don’t last. I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Never in a situation where we couldn’t dodge eachother but it’s been atleast four years since even that has happened I was the mayor for many years so unfortunately there were some events where I just had to suck it up and look the other way.
Whatif it’s the other way around? I was the one who stopped talking to a friend of more than 20 years when she became mean and passive aggressive towards me when I started doing very well in life and marriage. I know that if I confront her about her attitude (and these passive aggressiveness didn’t happen just one time they were starting to become her norm) I know she will deny and tell me I’m being too sensitive. So, am I the bad person for walking away without explaining why?
@@Nwladylaura369 Thank you, your kind words gave me so much comfort❤️ It has been weighing heavily in my heart and I keep thinking what if I said something but I knew then that even if I talk to her the friendship is not going to be the same.
Only you can make the decision for what is right and best for you. It sounds like you did that. Not every relationship ends the same way. You have to protect yourself first
0:27 The assumptions have to go. No some people are always making friends, other people reached their limits long ago. If you are on a platform that is global, then realise, not everyone is like you and you don't have a clue about the rest of the people, because you don't care at all to know the rest of the people, because its all about you, very onesided, not healthy.
I may be the ghoster (is that a word?) in my situation. I’ve known her over 30 yrs. I helped through cancer, her divorce from my brother etc. Then she betrayed me in some really thoughtless ways but I forgave her. I even apologized just to end the bad blood (though I was the “injured party!) When she came out of left field one day blaming me for my brothers legal end to paying child support (for a 23 yr old college age kid) she sounded nasty, petty and just not nice. Bitter. I realized I was simply done. I stopped any effort to communicate. Though it still hurts, I know she is actual quite a narcissist who never valued me as a person, just her manipulation of my kindness.
You did what was best for you.
I had a close friend who said she thought of me as "family". But, our friendship somehow just disappeared, for no apparent reason. She sadly passed away about a year and a half ago. It still hurts to this day. I really needed that connection with her. 😞
Oh I’m so sorry. It is so hard when things are left unsaid, thank you for reminding us that life is fragile😢
So very true Laura…I felt so guilty and even though I helped this person move not once, but twice, due to flood damage, I was floored when she just dumped me after 5 years. No email, no calls, no texts! So hurtful, the very least a friend can do, or have the respect to give an explanation. At least pets love you unconditionally! ❤
Sometimes it makes zero sense! And yes agree on the pets
I had to ghosted someone because the “ friend “ is not mature enough to have a decent conversation, I like to tell the “ friend “ what went wrong in the relationship but I know she will have no insight and she will get into arguments instead of reflect on how the relationship can be repaired and move forward positively. I have no other choice.
Often there is no other choice. You have to do what is best for you.
Good questions. My mother always taught me that you only need one really good friend, and to some degree I agree with that, but I also now know it’s incredibly needy and smothering to put that much pressure on someone!
I just found your channel and already I’m looking back on my failed friendships and I’m seeing the signs I chose to ignore. Several friends I still keep in touch with, but no longer have expectations of a deep relationship.
Glad you found the channel. Happy we are all talking about this topic
Wow you hit the nail on the head. Friends for over 50 years. Sent an email to me to tell me she was done with me This came two weeks after a very pleasant phone call .also not the first time she had sent me a message like this. This person is house bound, divorced for years with children she is always at odds with. I still work am married and live three hours away. I am going to honor he wish this time to remove herself from my life. I already feel a weight lifted from my shoulders
gosh what a tough time but sounds like she has a lot of stress in her life and you may be the "punching bag" you are smart to let it go Good luck!
She is deliberately pushing your buttons to gain attention. You are responding CORRECTLY. Do NOT back down.
This happened to me a few years back. My closest friend of 25 years (we were like sisters) downgraded our friendship to the point where it just couldn’t continue. I couldn’t change her ‘change’ towards me and our friendship. We are both now in our early 50s. Time has healed. You get used to not having this person in your life anymore and other people kind of fill that gap I guess over time. It’s been a life lesson for me.
I’ve learned the same lesson
Many years ago, even before cell phones, i ghosted a so called friend i had since junior high/high school and into our thirties. I just got tired of her selfishness and her antics. After so many years i needed to move on. She had moved out of state but came back to visit family. We made plans for dinner at my house. She never called or showed up. I was pretty irritated and just let it go. We would write letters pretty often and i got a letter, thinking i would get an explanation i was glad to get the letter. Not one word, not a im sorry, nothing, just like nothing happened. I never responded although she wrote several other letters. I decided that i didn't have time or the inclination to put up with her crap anymore.
You tried! That's all you can do, at some point you need to put yourself first.
Hi Laura, I discovered your channel a few weeks ago. This is my favourite clip so far. It resonates with me. It’s a bit late at night right now for me to share my stories but I hope to do so at some point. Thank you for sharing your personal experiences along with your loving advice and guidance.
I’m so glad you enjoyed it !
I don't have a close friend and don't expect to ever have another one in this life time. At 80, and with no reliable way to travel, I just have to be happy by myself. It isn't easy, as I'm not naturally a hermit, and it will probably shorten my life, since I have stage 4 breast cancer, but I accept that this is my life and I have to make the most of it.
Keeping you in my prayers! Glad you found my channel. There are lots of online chat groups that you might find interesting. No matter what your interests. I even saw some libraries have online reading/ discussion groups.
I also have metastatic breast cancer. Even with friends it can be lonely.
People grow and change just like the world does. I read the other day, "Just because you were friends years ago doesn't mean you should be friends today." I've gone through this with more than one person that I thought was a "friend" 40 years ago. I've had to learn that they weren't true friends at all. They were people I crossed paths with in a certain era of my life. Like pieces to a puzzle, we dont fit anymore, and we move on. Its not easy. Sometimes we dont understand and have hurt feelings. We have no choice but to accept and go on. What's sad is that from now on, you're careful from now on as to who you allow in your life.😊
Love this! Such a healthy outlook. We shouldn’t be embarrassed when things don’t work out. It’s just part of life❤ plus we call everyone a friend and honestly some people never really were
I’ve often thought that the mark of a true friend is real happiness for you when things go well, celebrating in your successes and achievements. It’s easy to
be sympathetic when times are tough. I think we’re lucky if we can count true friends on one hand in our lifetime, sad to say. I can’t say I’ve been stabbed in the back more than once, but I’ve experienced ghosting or what I call ‘the fadeout’ several times. Painful, but I’ve learned to move on.
I had my cousin in my life for 40 years. I grew up with her and thought of her as a sister. Then my mum died and very quickly she ghosted me. I realised quickly becouse of the large amount of time we had spent and how we kept in touch by phone if she was away. Many of your points hit home with me especially that she accused me of stalking her when I just wanted closure. She has never said why and never will now.
So sorry. I am sure jealousy was the reason.
Some people drain you. Some love drama and you are their only outlet.
This is not friendship.
Yes, the red flags are always there.
I have made the mistake MANY TIMES of thinking in befriending someone I could help them in some way. No more. It always ends up going south.
You are so right! Thanks for sharing
Thank you for this. I have really enjoyed listening to this “series”. Quite a few things you said gave me pause to think. I was hurt for a long while from a friend abruptly ending our nearly 20 year friendship and your thoughtful insights are helpful. It’s not easy finding new friends once you are over 50. Most women are already established in their friend groups.
Thank you for a thought provoking topic!❤️
Thanks so much! We are all working through the same things❤
It’s hard to admit someone you like & have things in common with are just not into you. Tough lesson to learn but when you look back you can see the flags you so greatly ignored. Why was I the one who always added to the friendship… still learning at 70 💕
Me too!!!! There are a lot of us
Well this one ended with a knife in the back. I’ve known her since i was 13. Im 67 now. She was the older sister of my closest friend. She used to be cruel to me, calling me thunder thighs and always demeaning me. I let all that go and we became friends, where she was in my wedding, socializing thru decades. I moved away for 10 years and when i came back she was mean, hostile, uncaring. After 2 years of this she unfriended me on Social Media. I told her sister i had had enough toxicity. my priority is to stay healthy so i can enjoy my grandchildren for decades to come. Some people do not age well. She’s an alcoholic on 2 antidepressants and Xanax. Im glad my trajectory is different.
Well there is never a way to manage someone else’s addiction. It usually becomes very toxic and never ends well….how could it. Sounds like you are much better off
She used to be cruel and demeaning to you. She just never stopped. I had a sibling who treated me this way until I realised that I deserved better.
@@suef5417so important to face reality
Thanks for this I have really struggled after the loss of a long term friend. I feel like the you hit the nail on the head with how some friends love you to stay where you are. I did a huge life change and went travelling for a year and the real nail in the coffin is getting a job role that took her a considerable time to get. I secured the job without even trying. The jealousy she had for my success was so painful because I supported her through all her struggles. Now I realise I was a good friend and I was just her counsellor. That was a hard bitter pill to swallow and still saddens me to this day
I love how you referred to yourself as her counselor. I honestly think so many women are looking for an ‘ear’ but it’s always one way. Just cheaper than paying someone🤦🏻♀️
Thanks a lot vor your insights.🌹
Well, I had an issue with a close friend I've had known for over 40 years. And in first Hand she was better than my real sister. In the end she ghostet me. It hurtet a lot. There never was an explaination of excuse. After that I pushed the breake . A while after that a met a new woman and made friends with her. She was so grateful etc etc. Just as you said.......Now I'm ghosted again. I'm done with it now. We're all in die sixtys now and there's not much to come. They all have their besties. I don't have the energy anymore. Lots of love from Germany 🌹💓
Well don’t give up! Find things that interest you pursue the things you love and enjoy and that is where you will meet new people. Maybe a new friend, maybe a new acquaintance sometimes it’s just enough to have a few folks you enjoy grabbing a cup of coffee with❤. Thanks for sharing.
Thank for your kind words.🌹
Well, in the last years I had some health issues. In time between I was happy to have a friend to talk to besides my husband.
The last one I don't run after. If I have a friendship I want a sincere one. If not it doesn't matter.
I like your videos. There's s lot of truth in. Take care 🍀
I’ve decided I need to be with healthy person. I can have compassion, but I am active and find that being around younger people with similar interests keeps me energized without that intense and draining commitment of the relationships of our youth . Grateful for my dog and a job that is meaningful.
knowing yourself first, so important. Thanks
Sometimes our innocent words wound someone close. Best to ask WHAT you have done…..allow her to respond……then you will know if you unknowingly wounded her.
With all due respect, people unfortunately change whether it is better for the best or the worst...
I have to believe that during my experience of my personal path of mortal existence, everyone does change....I'm a very proud man who will always understand what a man has to embrace during our personal periods of having to run the gauntlet and become better and stronger....
Unfortunately when disagreements arise.....a man has to understand that he has the public arena to embrace and to win the crowd and understand in the end that all he has is shadows and dust during the closing moments of his personal chapter....Respectively...
Thank you , I needed to hear this.
❤❤
Thank you for such great insight on this subject… I think we or “I” have too of of expectations with certain friends and then get discouraged when they don’t meet your high standard of a true friend.. I learned the hard way😊Kind Regards Coco
Thanks❤
There is a reason people cut others out or "ghost" someone. Most times people don't really want to know the reason. Communication is the last frontier.
Isn’t that the truth!!
@@laurahillauthor People are afraid of ghosts and don't know how to talk to them. All relationships are two ways streets. Thank you for your insightful perspective.
thank you!
I have been ghosted a couple of times. The last time, I can see things I could have handled differently. But I got the buzz off message on my voice mail that was ten years ago. I no longer care.
You don't know what you had till it's gone.
I’m thinking of withdrawing from a 44 year friendship. For so many years my low self esteem kept me making allowances for her not being there for me. We’ve had more than one conversation in the last few years when I told her how I felt, and she agreed that she’d been a ‘rubbish friend’ and would try harder. It was recently my birthday and she made no effort to do anything for me, not even a card. I feel really hurt and that it’s time I value myself and pull back, even though I only have one other friend. She is totally oblivious that I’m even upset, and will be shocked when I tell her. I guess we just have different values; it’s so sad as we have a lot of shared history but I just can’t keep doing this to myself. 😢
You will never loose the great memories and maybe if you pull back she will rethink and come around. You just can’t get stuck on a see-saw. Sorry I know it’s hard
Let her be shocked. You do not need her.
@@mikewebber2637 Thank you
These people may act naive, but they know what they are doing. She may "act" shocked, but really, she isn't.
OMGOSH! I LOVE your kitchen. Yours is the most perfect kitchen I think I’ve ever seen.
Thanks so much. After 24 years in our house we finally did a little update ❤
Love, love, love your thoughts and observations. Great video!
Thanks so much!
if a person is a user, makes nasty remarks and put downs, is bossy, oversteps boundaries then they should not be surprised when they are ghosted. that's why i dropped my neighbor like a hot potato.... and i don't feel i owe her any explanation. she knows how she was behaving and didn't care. many people who are ghosted have ruined friendships / relationships before and they never change. if you are not one of these people and you're ghosted then you have a clear conscience and consider it a blessing that a person was weeded out of your life.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
So good …….”unhealthy relationships end with a knife”…………happened to me.
Hope you’re all better now!!
@@laurahillauthor I am MUCH better. The knife was not a surprise really and I did not react - responded casually and moved on.
It hasn't been my experience to "make friends at every age". And I think that is probably more common than those who do make friends at every age, although, I could be mistaken.
It would have been better if I clarified that’s there is no stage of life that is solely the ‘making friends’ stage, but rather it’s possible to make friends at any age as long as you want to. Thanks for your comment. Wish I had said it better
I had a long term person in my life..43 years..I had a loss due to death recently and this person ...living a block away...could not manage to come over and even give a hug...six months pass..and a couple of weeks ago...I finally told her of the expirence she gave me and the truth of how it effected to me...and the response she gave was my first reality of what a true 'gasligher' is...she said...I really need to do something about my anger...and the county has mental health help available for me.
WOW...I was not even angry when I told her of my truth of her non action as it were...
All I could say was ...she never holds her self accountable..( there had been many similar situations thru the years of being her 'friend)..her response to that was...I don't know her.
Well, actually I do.....and now more than ever.
it's funny because ...she actually was probably looking in the mirror when she responded to me as she did...but I am sure she would never see that reflection.
oh, what a relief it is to have that energy out of my life...
What a painful way to find out who a person really is. I hope you know that this is all about them and their shortcomings and has nothing to do with you. Some people have no empathy, and yes some are just downright selfish and cruel. You’re smart to get help if you need it. ❤❤
Wow. Swear words and a certain finger gesture are not always the answer but in this case…. Just wow
Women need to get real about why they want some women as friends and not others. Too many women are treating youtube speakers like this one like friends. Too sad!
I think it’s about shared experiences not friendship. Thanks for sharing your thoughts
So good! Love your five points. 🥰
Thanks so Much! Appreciate all your support❤
I lost a friend of 40 years because of our different vaccination beliefs.
So many women have lost friends over beliefs like the vaccine. Politics, religion and covid have ruined so many friendships
Concerning the vaccine beliefs. I might be wrong, but many of us who were/are against the vaccine are viewing it from a biblical aspect. And it absolutely terrifies us when our friends so willy-nilly think nothing of jumping thru our government’s hoops. Not sure which side you were on in your debate, but yes, I certainly can understand how friendships might go adrift. THIS subject can definitely cause people to be testy.
I’d love to see a video about navigating work friendships. Many times when I’ve moved to another position or workplace those friendships don’t last. I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Thanks! That’s actually my strong suit and what got me into leadership speaking. I’ll definitely do that
@@laurahillauthor You are so good! Such a pleasure to hear your discussions. It's so real and speaks to me and my life.
❤❤❤❤❤❤
Laura, did you ever again run into this person???
Never in a situation where we couldn’t dodge eachother but it’s been atleast four years since even that has happened I was the mayor for many years so unfortunately there were some events where I just had to suck it up and look the other way.
Whatif it’s the other way around? I was the one who stopped talking to a friend of more than 20 years when she became mean and passive aggressive towards me when I started doing very well in life and marriage. I know that if I confront her about her attitude (and these passive aggressiveness didn’t happen just one time they were starting to become her norm) I know she will deny and tell me I’m being too sensitive. So, am I the bad person for walking away without explaining why?
No you are not! Just let her go. New kinder people will come your way. ❤
@@Nwladylaura369 Thank you, your kind words gave me so much comfort❤️ It has been weighing heavily in my heart and I keep thinking what if I said something but I knew then that even if I talk to her the friendship is not going to be the same.
Only you can make the decision for what is right and best for you. It sounds like you did that. Not every relationship ends the same way. You have to protect yourself first
0:27 The assumptions have to go. No some people are always making friends, other people reached their limits long ago. If you are on a platform that is global, then realise, not everyone is like you and you don't have a clue about the rest of the people, because you don't care at all to know the rest of the people, because its all about you, very onesided, not healthy.
Thanks so much for your insight. You are correct we can only share our own experiences and learn from others